Cryptomnesia
by pinkpower
Summary: She was a lifetime Jacob's heart would always know, despite how much he wanted to forget. Jacob/Renesmee AU-ish . Rated 'M' for inevitable lemons.
1. Prologue

**Disclaimer: As per usual, nothing belongs to me, but if Smeyer wanted to leave the whole Twilight saga franchise in her will for some reason, I would gladly accepted. And of course, 'Running Up that Hill' belongs to Kate Bush, even though the Track and Field cover is _really_ good.**

**A few things before we start, that you probably might want to know so you don't get too confused: In this alternate universe, Jacob ran away (again) after Edward gave him the keys to his car, and did not end up imprinting on Renesmee, nor will he be imprinting on her when he meets her. And I'll explain much of that later on. In the meantime, R&R!**

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><p><em>It doesn't hurt me<em>

_You wanna feel how it feels_

_You wanna know, know that it doesn't hurt me_

_You, you and me_

**Prologue:**

In one impossible moment of failure, the shadows battled the radiant, warm light from the sun into submission, and his whole world had been plunged into the darkness. He could barely breathe, could barely hold on to the twine of his treacherous immortality, could barely think straight without his mind returning the same moment—where the universe had been suddenly cut away from him, all because he was too late.

"_This is all my fault."_

"_Jacob, there is nothing—nothing!—you could have done."_

"_I should have been faster, I should have never left her alone, I should have been there to protect her-"_

"_No, don't do that to yourself, Jacob! She knew what she was getting herself into, and we both know you would have done the exact thing for her."_

"_And that's it? Is this how everything is supposed to end? Without a fight? I can't accept that. I won't give up on her."_

"_Jacob, what you're wishing for is impossible. She's dead. Accept it."_

"_How can I? Tell me that! How can I? She. . . I can't."_

How long had he been lying there, numbly motionless on the hollow ground blanketed by autumn leaves? It could have been mere hours, a few days, an entire fortnight, several months, or even a handful of years. To Jacob, it felt more like the quick milliseconds kept ticking into eternity, as he gazed up at the merciless, metallic sky with all its bruised cirrus clouds, and his eyes searched for hope, but found none.

Cold.

His blood ran cold, like thick icicles trying to shove their way through his stubborn veins. It didn't matter to him anyway. There was no longer any warmth in his pitiful life to give his spirit the will to keep fighting on, nothing could replenish his weathering strength now.

The sun—what did it look like? When was the last time he saw it?

"God," he muttered, expelling a sharp exhale, "I have never prayed before, but here I am with no other choice. Please, help me. . ." It was nearly impossible to continue. His tongue swelled three times too big, dry like the Egyptian deserts, and his lips were chapped, but Jacob willed himself to keep his mouth in movement. "Help us. I can't—I can't live without her. She was my everything," his calm crashing waves, his thrumming heartbeat, and the golden light encircled around his giant star.

Again, the frigid darkness began to possess his pure heart; thus, damning his very soul.

He was a blind man once more, but the sun would not give him salvation this time around. Yet still, Jacob prayed for this miracle.

"I don't know what to offer you in return, or how I could ever make it up to you, but if want a life back—trade mine for hers. Don't bail on me now. . . I love her to much to let everything end like this, God."

His wife's life had been stolen all too soon, and every moment that passed the memories of her—how she would hum softly whilst preparing a morning meal in the kitchen, the tingling sensation on his lips after a kiss with her, or the simple rhythm of her heart—were becoming distant, fading into an alternate reality. But the existence of her remained everywhere. Jacob could still remember the gentle curve of her smile, and tasting those perfect lips for the very first time on the cliff near First Beach—their cliff.

Everything was rapidly slipping away from Jacob's feeble hands—the cables had transformed into thin balloon strings, and the weight of the world could not keep him from drifting into deep space.

"Bring her back, God," Jacob begged, "I need her!" His truth echoed into the vapid wind. He needed that woman like Earth needed oxygen to survive, needed her like flowers in bloom needed the summer sun to sustain life, needed her so desperately like the day night needed the night. "Bring her back to me!"

It should have been him. He should have been the one to die. Not her. Why? Why did she have to be so _stupid_ and go get herself murdered? She shouldn't have died in his place; she shouldn't have. . .

She should have known that Jacob would wither slowly into the dust without her.

Jacob belt out an earsplitting, echoing noise, between a splintered cry and a psychoneurotic laugh. He pounded his left fist into the ground, causing a wide crack to form—similar to the very one in the pit of his chest—and growled ferociously into the dirt. He couldn't take it. He couldn't take on life without her.

"Do you hear me, God! Bring her back! Take my life instead!"

"Jacob!" a long-familiar voice yelled—not deep like he would have imagined God's voice to be. "I think. . . I found a way."

_And if I only could make a deal with God_

_And get Him to swap our places_

_Be running up that road_

_Be running up that hill_

_Be running up that building_

_With no problems._

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><p><strong>P.S. R&amp;R!<strong>


	2. Just a Dream

**Disclaimer: Nothing belongs to me, guys! All property of SM. "Just a Dream" cover by Sam Tsui and Christina Grimmie.**

**Author's Note: I want to make it very clear that Jacob is not still in love with Bella—the only thing he feels for her at this point is resentment. ****R&R! :)**

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><p><em>'Cause I can still feel it in the air<em>

_See your pretty face, run my fingers through your hair_

_My lover, my life_

_My baby, my wife_

_You left me, I'm tied_

_Once again, the story starts with one look._

Jacob Black loathed the thirteenth of September. Every year he would have the same, dumb dream of losing her, whoever 'her' was supposed to be. He concluded that the dream must have been his former best friend, Bella Swan, since the date was her birthday, and he no longer feared losing her to some evil creature, considering that had already happened along time ago. Let her be a filthy bloodsucker!

_Pfft, Bella. . . , _he mused bitterly. He had a very little idea what had happened to her after the past eight years, and really couldn't have cared less. After he ran away with the Mercedes Guardian, Jacob bothered to call Billy once a month, but their conversations barely lasted longer than ten minutes. The most Jacob found about the Cullen coven was that they weren't far from Forks, Bella had given birth to a demonic imp, and the singular reason the La Push pack didn't dispose of it was all thanks to Leah Clearwater imprinting on it.

Thank goodness he bailed on that drama.

"Hey, Jake!" a chipper, feminine voice called.

Being stolen away from his thoughts, the shape-shifter's dark-brown eyes transitioned to his friend's pretty face—her pink tulip lips spread into a bright smile and cinnamon orbs lit to the brim with mirth and joy. Sometimes Jacob truly wished his brief sort-of relationship with Lizzie Nesam would have blossomed into a great, vigorous love, but the chemicals in his body couldn't be forced to respond in a romantic or physical way. Alas, he was grateful that they stayed friends after their mutual break-up.

"Oh, hey," he answered back exhaustively, half-smiling up at her.

Lizzie giggled, pouring some warm coffee into his blue mug. "You've been staring off into space for half an hour, buddy," she stated, sitting down in the booth, across from the Quileute native. "And you have thick bags under your eyes. Oh—the dream!" the redhead gave him an apologetic smile, reached over, and patted his shoulder in a soothingly maternal manner. "No wonder! I'm sorry."

"Don't worry, Lizzie. It's just a silly, stupid dream. No big deal." Jacob sighed, pouring a splash of cream into the black liquid and swirled the two together. He drank a sip and calm seized through his veins. "Thank you, though," he said as his mouth offered a light-hearted grin, nodding and yawning. "So, how's your morning going?"

"Slow, as Mondays go, I suppose," she replied in a tone dripping with stone-cold boredom, "but I've gotten pretty good tips. Hint, hint."

"That's good," he commented, lying down a ten-dollar bill for his friend, the happy waitress of a cafe in Seattle, Washington. "At least one of us is having a decent morning."

"Hey, you'd be having a wonderful morning, too, Jacob, if only you didn't have stick wedged up your ass," Lizzie remarked in amuse.

"Well, we can't all be rainbows and sunshine like you. Some of us regular human beings are forced to live in reality, cupcake," he responded, shaking his head.

She shrugged nonchalantly, thieving a bacon strip off Jacob's plate of pancakes and scrambled eggs. "I do live in reality, Jacob, but mine is way less depressing. With a simple change in point of view, I can make any lame day an awesome one."

If only he could make life that freaking simple; to Jacob, happiness wasn't a state of mind, just an incentive to live a certain way. But he, despite all the vast treasures he possessed in his youthful existence, earnestly felt nothing and no one would ever give him long-lasting satisfaction. Although, he tried a hundred times searching for it—with Bella, with Lizzie, with many other girls, and never once had he come within a meter of happiness.

God, he tried so hard. . .

"Awesome. You should document your philosophy and make a good buck."

"Such a sourpuss, Jake."

"At your service."

They laughed in unison.

Suddenly, the bell of the door jingled melodically, signaling the entrance of a new customer.

Jacob briefly glanced and caught himself doing a double take. It was an eighteen year-old girl-woman that walked right in, and immediately upon arrival, an enthusiastic busboy seated her at a table adjacent from Jacob's. He took her order—sweet tea and a blueberry muffin—while grinning in a creepy way, and scurried away to the kitchen. Not that Jacob could fault the poor sucker; this stochastic girl was quite the looker.

Her skin appeared white like creamy moonlight, smooth like a Chinese silk sheet, and her deep auburn hair curled into perfect, lush loops. Jacob's stomach churned chaotically, both in a good and bad way, and his head whirled. Had they ever met before? No, no way. Jacob had an elephant's memory. He would have been able to recall her for certain.

Wouldn't he?

The girl settled down on a small chair, beginning to read some romance novel with Fabio on the cover, and seemed to be smiling to herself—content and tranquil. Jacob could only watch the stranger through an acute peripheral vision as he tried to carry on his part of the conversation with Lizzie, but wasn't very convincing in his attempt. His oak-wood eyes frequently flickered back and forth betwixt his friend and the somehow familiar stranger approximately every thirty seconds.

"Of course, fairly priced jeans are hard to come by," Lizzie said, finishing her ramble. "Not that I think you care at all when you're making googly eyes with your girlfriend over there."

He arched a mockingly defensive eyebrow, black and stiff. "Hey, I'm listening. I'm just suddenly distracted."

"Spare me the details of your newfound attraction, lover boy," she teased, grinning playfully. "It's super obvious Miss Priss is out of your league." It was true. Everything about this girl breathed and screamed high-class: her cashmere pink sweater, the golden locket hanging over her chest, and that flawless posture. "I've gotta get back to work, anyway," Lizzie announced, dusting off her uniform apron. "Just finish your breakfast. If you stay any longer, I'm afraid your obese butt will leave a permanent indent on the seat."

Jacob huffed and rolled his eyes. "Eight years I've known you, and _now_ you tell me that my ass is big? Well, you know what? Your face reminds me of an ugly fish!"

"You jackass!" Lizzie smacked Jacob upside the head, but laughed whole-heartedly. "Fine, I hate you, too!"

"Join the club!" he called back as she walked away to another table, flipping the bird at him. "Is that your age or I.Q.?"

Hearing the sound of a faint giggle, Jacob noticed the girl changing the page in entertainment after probably hearing the latter half of their banter.

Geesh, what was his problem? Why couldn't be like his pack brothers and imprint already?

"Here you go, Miss, your blueberry muffin and sweet tea. May I get anything else for you?" the waiter inquired, eyeballing her fraction of exposed cleavage. "It would be my pleasure to help you out."

She smiled up at him, unaware of his flirtatious mannerisms—such as his leering stance, leaning casually on the table and waggling his eyebrows. "Thank you, but as of right now I'm enjoying my book."

"Oh, really? What's it about?" he asked indulgently. This dude didn't look like he had ever cracked open a book.

Her two pools of milk chocolate glinted vibrantly, cataloging a good explanation, and replied simply, "True love." She shrugged sheepishly, sweeping a strand of copper hair behind her ear. "It's really cheesy stuff."

"Chick-flick bullshit in a book, huh?"

She grimaced, embarrassed at her busboy's negative tone. "I-I-I suppose."

And in that instant, both pairs of brown eyes finally met. A absolute mistake. She attempted in difficulty to refuse Jacob her mystified gaze, but, in spite of herself, could not. Jacob's mouth formed a smile, the biggest he'd produced in a long time.

Consequently, the envious waiter glowered maliciously at her crystal clear disinterest with him and stomped away, grumbling and mumbling, "Fine, be that way. Let her be a book-reading slut. See if I care. . ."

And for a second—just for a second—Jacob felt a familiar warmth crash over him when he saw those eyes, big and brown as they were. He couldn't keep himself from laughing slightly as her porcelain hued cheeks went magenta.

She was beautiful, no doubt about it.

"So how long is this staredown supposed to go on?" the girl finally inquired docilely, slipping a bookmark between the novel's thin pages and closed it.

Jacob blinked, returning to actuality and answered, "Why? Do you have something better to do?"

"That depends on who you ask," the stranger said, rolling her eyes. "Personally, I could do this all day. How about you?"

"I'm game, lady. It happens to be my day off."

"Oh, lucky me! I don't want to make your waitress girlfriend jealous, however." She gestured over to Lizzie, who was busy busting other tables.

"No, no, no, _no_. Lizzie is just a really good friend of mine," he instantly retorted.

The young woman giggled, a sound that comforted Jacob's restless disposition, tapping the heel of her green converse against the chair's leg and shook her head. "I find it rather quaint that you're very eager to convince me that she is of no romantic intrigue to you, even though we've barely just met."

Jacob raised his hands in defeat. "You caught me. But to be fair, you started flirting with me first." His eyebrows furrowed, and he threw a dashing smirk her direction. "And you haven't asked me for my name either."

Crossing her legs and folding her arms gently over her bust, she glowered at him in jest. "Come again? _I_ was just striking up a friendly conversation with a dapper gentleman, who is evidently unable to keep his eyes to himself."

Winking, Jake queried, "Sure, sure. So, do I get to learn your name?"

She got up from her seat then, shoving her book into the Prada handbag, and strut over to his booth like a trained model—subtle hips swelling down from her waistline. "Tell you what—guess my name."

"Er. . . Rumpelstiltskin, right?" he joked, earning a laugh.

"No, but you're actually pretty close. Oh, well." She shrugged casually, and turned halfway to leave.

Jacob stood up, his knees reacting to her near exit like a Tug of War, yet his mind was mildly befuddled. This random girl didn't matter much at all to him. "Wait, hold on a second! Um, what-what is your name?"

Nameless Woman sighed, gently chewing her nether lip until it grew plump and red, as her chocolate orbs explored the contours of the Native American's face curiously. "If I ever see you again, then I'll know you're worthy enough to know my name."

"Why am I not worthy now?" Jacob asked, but not in offense.

Her face twisted in uncertainty. "Because given to the unlikely chances of us meeting once again tomorrow or thirty years from now, you'd forget my name anyway."

Jacob chortled to himself; a werewolf typically had a keen memory, but he couldn't tell a human that. "Is that some sort of rule you have, lady?"

She nodded. "Yeah."

"Then, I'm the exception."

"Oh?" Her tone gave away her dubiousness, and knocked on the wooden table thrice. "We shall see." She deliberately brushed her fingertips against his knuckles, and both brows quirked in disheartenment—possibly in _fear_? Had her heartbeat been that fast a moment ago? "Who-who are _you_?" She withdrew her hand. In turn, the one hundred and eight degrees Fahrenheit wolf felt cold without her touch.

Weird.

"Nope, you have to tell me your name first," Jacob stated.

"Goodbye," the girl murmured, using her curtain of bronze tendrils to shield her flushed cheeks.

And Jacob really should have left it that as he let her go without a trace; he should have never again thought about that perfect stranger; he should have never wished to her again; he should have never left it up to Fate. But when Seth requested that Jacob be the best man at his upcoming wedding, Jacob should have refused. He didn't.

Frickin' Seth.

_I was thinking about you_

_Thinking about me_

_Thinking about us_

_What we gonna be?_

_Open my eyes_

_It was only just a dream_


	3. A Drop in the Ocean

**Disclaimer: Nothing belongs to me, sadly. Someday I'll get over it. 'A Drop in the Ocean' by Ron Pope. Ooh, that song is so beautimus. :3**

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><p><em>Misplaced trust in old friends<em>

_Never counting regrets_

_By the grace of God, I do not rest at all_

_And New England as the leaves change_

_The last excuse that I'll claim:_

_I was a boy who loved a woman like a little girl_

_And still I can't let you be_

_Most nights I hardly sleep_

_Don't take what you don't need from me_

_She—the flawless counterpart to his soul, his purpose for plainly being—looked so peaceful there in bed next to Jacob, lying serenely asleep wrapped in white sheets. Her pale skin glowed like alabaster moonbeams on a winter night, but she was his renewed summer season. _

_How could a woman that beautiful be all his for always? Jacob couldn't help himself; he gingerly pressed his lips against the smooth surface of her exposed shoulder, trailing upward to nibble on her earlobe._

"_Jacob" she murmured softly, stifling a fit of giggles, and hugged his right arm closer between her breasts. "Oh, Jacob. . ."_

_Listening to his name parting from her vocal chords sent the vulnerable Alpha spiraling up to the stratosphere. It was a different sensation to love one person this much and for that one person to love him without reserve in return. She was the only lifetime Jacob ever wanted to experience over and over again._

"_I love you," the werewolf stated, feeling her body let out a relaxed breath against him. _

_Surely, this—this was heaven._

_Her body turned over on the mattress to face him, slowly fluttering her eyelids open to reveal the most spectacular shade of chocolate Jacob would ever see—like Bella's had been before Edward changed her, like the stranger's at the cafe. But tears fell like Washington raindrops from her thickly rimmed, black eyelashes._

"_Hey, hey, what's wrong?" Jacob's thumbs automatically reached to wipe the liquid away from her cheeks. "You can tell me."_

_She laughed. "Nothing. Nothing at all, Jacob. I love you, too, and I just wish we could lay like this forever. I feel complete whenever I'm with you."_

_Jacob felt quite the same. Last night, especially, survived as a highlight. Without her, Jacob was only one fraction of a whole person walking where gravity could not thrive. He. . . Sometimes he wandered what her life might have been without him, if she could have learned to love someone else, but no reassurance was necessary when he pictured his life without. _

_A selfish thought, thought it may be, Jacob didn't want to find out. _

_He chortled lightly, kissing her forehead. "Well, I've never tried anything like that before, but I'll do my best to keep us going as long as possible." If he could, Jacob would have signed his name happily on that contract to prove his vow to her, though he could sense his words alone were more than good enough on her behalf. _

_Again, she laughed, but this time it was a sound of deviltry. Of course, Jacob knew what she wanted—the chemicals of his own body had already begun to react to hers, and after a playful chuckle or two, he slipped into her, and they united as morning lovers._

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><p><strong>One week later:<strong>

La Push—where his friends and family continued to dwell and multiply, where his ancestors fought to protect and preserve human life from nasty bloodsuckers, where he could have truly belonged as Ephraim Black's rightful heir.

Jacob faltered momentarily, before knocking on the front door to Seth Clearwater's house. He could do this, no problem. This was it. Time to come home.

"Jake, buddy!" Seth greeted happily, swinging to door wide open.

"Hey, hey!" A grin spread across his cheeks; it was good to see an old friend. "Man, Seth!" The two shared a quick hug, and pat each other on the back. "How's it going?"

"Not bad, not bad. Well, obviously," Seth retorted. "Come on in, bro. Meet the fiancee. The others will get here soon. Everybody's dying to see you again."

With a patient nod, Jacob entered the house and walked into the living room where Seth's imprint was busy polishing the mantle. He smiled when she glanced up; she was definitely pretty—hazel eyes, caramel skin, black hair, high cheekbones, and admittedly chubby in most areas of her body, but not in a hideous fashion. Jacob thought she wore her skin well, and instantly decided that he liked her.

"Hi!" she exclaimed geedily. "You must be the famous Jacob Black I've heard so much about!"

"I, uh, guess so." Jacob shrugged in a confused manner, sitting on Seth's blue leather barcalounger recliner. "Are the poor, unsuspecting girl that's been suckered into being this guy's mate for life?"

"I am indeed, but it's the best prison sentence I could ever hope for."

"Hey!" Seth protested, stomping a foot in jest. "Anyway, Jacob, this is my imprint and my soon-to-be wife, Marguerite Kellar."

"Madge for short," she added immediately. "You wolves can't really stand three syllables in a name, can ya?"

"Nice to meet you, Madge," Jacob replied, shaking her hand. "So, when's the big day?"

"Two weeks," the raven-haired woman retorted sweetly, in a tone that implied she just couldn't wait until the main event. "We've been dating for three years and I don't see the point in waiting any longer."

"Yeah. . . Is it safe to assume the whole Scooby-Doo gang is attending?" Jacob inquired, barely curious for a response. He already knew that Edward and Seth had remained good pals throughout the past eight years after Leah imprinted on the Cullen spawn.

Seth nodded. "Yep! Look, buddy, I know you and Bella have a lot of unresolved issues that I can't help fix, but-"

"Stop right there," Jacob said, interrupting his former pack mate mid-sentence. "Gimme a little credit, will ya? Bella is in my past and that's where she's staying. Me and her—whatever we were back then—I am not in love with a girl who only used me as a shoulder to cry on until Eddie-boy came crying home. I'll be fine," and he meant every word spoken from his lips. "Still, catch me up a bit. What are the new terms of the treaty?"

"The Cullens aren't allowed on the land, except for emergencies and special occasion—our wedding for example. Regarding the daughter. . ."—_daughter?_— ". . . she can come and go as she pleases."

Jacob's arms flailed about dramatically, oak orbs growing wide. "Woah, woah, woah, _woah_! Wait just a second here!" That's different. Leah imprinted on a girl? "A girl?" he asked, his inner musing running an echoed muck throughout his brain.

Bella had been so certain that the abomination nesting inside her womb like a virus was male.

Seth shrugged, his shoulders trembling with roaring laughter at Jake's reaction. "Life can be funny. We all love the crap out of Ren, even Paul!"

Marguerite clapped, expressing her agreement. "Oh, yeah! Ren is the sweetest thing ever!"

Jacob huffed inaudibly and rolled his eyes. "Yup, 'thing' is the right word for this instance."

The younger shape-shifter grimaced uncomfortably, shaking his head in blatant disapproval. "C'mon, Jake. Ren's really awesome once you get to know her. She's done a great service for the tribe and for Leah. We are finally at peace with the Cullens, Leah's always blissed out of her mind and forgave Sam, and—what can I say, Jake?—Ren is-"

"She's really awesome. Sure, sure. I got it," he retorted sardonically. "Leah's imprint ties you to that freak of nature, so you aren't thinking clearly either."

Seth grinned, nearly knowingly. "Nah. I don't think so, dude. It's impossible to hate Ren. You'll love her, too," he challenged, tempting fate.

Jacob flared his nostrils wide, balling his fists at the notion of his brothers acting friendly with the enemy—eating roasted marshmallows off a stick, drawing pictures in the damp sand, twirling around by the dancing firelight, and whatever else it was that friends do.

"Sorry. That's not happening," the would-have-been Alpha grumbled. The devil's red kingdom would have to become decorated in ice crystals and pigs must be able to soar above white clouds before he befriended a stupid bloodsucker.

Marguerite and Seth exchanged glances of unusual doubt, prior to going on to plead his argument. "I guess you and Ren must think alike. Every time your name comes up in a conversation, she actually gets chills. Haha, that's always hilarious! She only agreed to tolerate you for Leah's sake."

A midnight black brow quirked in mild delectation, surprised that a disgusting creature of capable of possessing a plethora of adoration could share a mutual hatred. Jacob wasn't sure how he felt about this information. "Gross. Man, poor Leah. I feel really bad that she's forced to end up with some leech. I would shoot myself in the face if I were in her shoes."

Marguerite's face screwed up into an expression of utter irritation. "I don't really know you, Jacob, and I am reluctant to pass judgment since you were once so close to everybody, but Ren is one of the most remarkable people I have ever met. You'd realize that, too, if your ego wasn't so huge."

"Actually," Seth added, clearing his throat before tension arose, "Madge had been taking a hike in the woods when a rogue, newborn vamp leaped out at her, but Ren saved her. Of course, I had been scouting the area with her, and that's when Madge and I met." He finished his explanation, embracing his soul mate from behind.

Madge planted an affectionate kiss upon the base of Seth's jawline, her blue-green-gray-brown eyes admiring the contours of his face. "Ren is my maid of honor."

"Good for you guys, I guess. I have a life away from this place anyway. Once this wedding jazz is all over and done with, I'm outta here and back to Seattle."

Suddenly, the stubborn man-wolf felt a gentle tug from the roots of his black hair. "Jeeze, little bro, take it easy on the melodrama. How have you not been casted on 'the Young and the Restless' yet?"

Jacob turned his head and brought himself to his feet to hug his older sister. "Rachel!" It was surreal to see her face again, nearly a dream.

"Oh, Jacob! Boy, I've missed you!" Rachel exclaimed, wrapping her bronze arms tightly around his broad shoulders. "Come back home for good, Jake. I don't want my children growing up with their uncle."

He pulled away, maintaining a warm grin on his lips, as convincing as he could muster. "I can't, Rach, you know that. La Push isn't for me anymore."

"That's ridiculous, Jacob! La Push is our home, remember?" Rachel pleaded, giving him her best puppy dog eyes, but he wasn't budging on the subject. "Idiot face. . . !"

Paul gripped his imprint's shoulders, slowly massaging them until his calmed down. "It's his choice, honey. Just relax."

Rachel heaved a breathy sigh.

He couldn't blame her much, despite the tiny fact she and Rebecca once did the same thing to him, but Jacob hardly understood his own motives for staying away for so long. Maybe it was a stored wisdom that kept Jacob cooped up in Seattle, to not make a fool of himself by seeking revenge for a love long cold in the ground or an imprint he would never have. Maybe it was pride that never once allowed him to forgive those who were responsible for wounding his spirit. Maybe it was of his own freewill, at least he would never be forced to bend to Destiny like a puppet. Whatever reasons there were, Jacob still knew deep down they were all 'ridiculous.'

"I smell a teary powwow," Leah announced, her voice light and cheery to a fault that was almost unsettling to Jacob's eardrums. His brown-eyed gaze averted from his sister to Leah Clearwater, who smartly remained a secure distance. "Hey, Jake, long time no see! This is my imprint, Renesmee."

Jacob looked, in much hesitance, upon Bella and Edward's female spawn. What stood in the center of Seth and Marguerite's hallway was. . . It was not a crimson monster with glowing scales, razor-sharp fangs, or hissing snakes for hair. It was not an eight year-old girl dressed in a pink dress with her hair tied in adorable pigtails, and holding a lollipop in one hand. It—_she_ was the spitting image of everything Jacob had not imagined.

Indeed, right then and there, Jacob Black earned the right to the stranger's name, fore it was the girl he briefly encountered at the cafe a week ago—the same one he was never supposed to see again, the girl he dreamt about the other night. As she gazed back at Jake's figure in mild fascination, she seemed to have no recollection of him whatsoever.

"Ren," Leah spoke in a tone that implied her content state of being, and Jacob inwardly shuddered, "this is-"

Renesmee's strawberry lips parted slightly, staring coldly in his path in such a casual manner that Jacob was positive he was the only person that noticed. "Jacob Black." She nodded curtly. "It's interesting to finally meet you—sort of."

"You wanna get a soda for the kitchen for me, sweetie?" Leah inquired, patting the half-human half-vampire on her forearm. "Please?"

"Sure, sure," Renesmee replied. "Anything specific?"

"Surprise me." Leah sneaked a glance at Jacob, wary and cautiously. She thought Jacob might harm her imprint, but—as much as Jacob wanted to—there were some pack laws even didn't have the heart to break. "Thank you." More sentimental looks were exchanged between the two women; none that were romantic, however.

"I'll be right back," Ren said, walking away from Leah, toward Jacob. She purposely bumped her shoulder against Jacob's arm, conveying her annoyance with his presence, but smirked precariously when their eyes locked for the briefest second.

And all Jacob could think about was how Ren was far too plain a nickname for this girl.

_It's just a drop in the ocean_

_A change in the weather_

_I was praying that you and me_

_Might end up together_

_It's like wishing for rain as I stand in the desert _

_But I'm holding you closer than most_

_'Cause you are my heaven_

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><p><strong>AN: You should know that Leah and Renesmee are not lebsians. Again, I have my reasons behind this particular imprint.**


	4. That Girl

**Disclaimer: Nothing, not a thing, belongs to yours truly. (On a side note, omg! How awesome was Breaking Dawn part one?) 'That Girl' by Alexz Johnson! Love that chick...**

**Author's Note: Special thanks to all you beautiful reviewers!**

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><p><em>I say you got some issues<em>

_Yeah, you do_

_Somethings you gotta work through_

_Well, you do_

_It's sorta like a talk show_

_No, wait a freak show_

_When the freak is you_

Jacob, for reasons he found quite inexplicable, was incapable of peal his mahogany sight away from the half-breed woman, roaming about the living room with Leah trailing behind her out of protective instincts. His stomach churned, nauseated by the image of this unknown being and his pack sister giggling like giddy high school girls.

Their bond made no sense.

"Since when is Leah batting for the other team?" Jacob grumbled in botheration, trying to remind his body to keep breathing so he wouldn't transform into a wolf smack-dab in the middle of the happy couple's home; that would have been extremely rude.

_Inhale, exhale. Inhale, exhale. Inhale, exhale._

"Chillax, dude," Embry cautioned, feeling how his friend's arms violently trembled. "Ren is one of us, too."

"Yeah," Quil agreed in a careful murmur.

Jacob snorted, his face growing dispassionately hot under his hatred. The wolf spirit, too, burned perilously for Renesmee Cullen's destruction, to commit murder using only his two bare hands. He longed to toss her body, limb by limb, into a tall fire somewhere and save his friends from her poisonous presence.

"You are crazy. She will _never_ be one of us," the Quileute-borne man sneered in repulsion, a growl emitting low from his chest. Although, Jacob was well aware of the fact that he no longer had a say about any matter that was about the La Push wolf pack. Maybe it wasn't his business to still care, yet he did. "Not in a thousand years."

The half-human half-vampire turned away from her conversation with Leah and Marguerite, narrowing her chocolate eyes into a ferocious glower back at Jacob, her expression extraordinarily similar to her father's. Her arms crossed impatiently over her chest, standing straight with that signature Cullen posture.

"I am not deaf, Jacob Black," she declared, uttering every syllable of his name with dripping, crisp malevolence. "If you have a problem with me, why don't you tell me instead of mumbling to your friends like a coward?"

"_Coward_!" he repeated incredulously, stepping forward.

"Yes, I do believe that's what I just said."

"Jacob," Leah warned, taking a cautionary stance in front of Renesmee, ready to fend a battle between two different species, "just don't, please? Ren's just being her usual stubborn self. Don't let her antagonize you."

"No, Leah," the hybrid spoke clearly, lying a tentative hand on her imprinter's forearm, and Leah took a hesitant step backward. "Jacob, I am not afraid of you."

"You're an idiot not to be," he spat, aggravated. "I can rip you a part."

Well, actually, Jacob promised himself that if the opportunity ever arose, he would start by thrashing her body against a boulder until all her bones broke in half. Then, he would happily rip her apart. No—no, his mind retracted the fantasy instantly.

How could he think to do such a thing to Leah? He would never. . . He would never be that ruthless.

"Really?" she queried, practically laughing at him, the little hyena. . . Renesmee let out a steady breath, the slightest fraction of her breasts showing from her V-cut shirt, where Jacob's vision briefly lingered, and then returned to her face. "_If you can't even control your attraction to me, what makes you think I can't doge any fight you might start, Mr. Hyde_?"

Jacob's stomach coiled and tightened. Her voice sounded obstreperously, but her lips had not moved. Of course, he should have guessed that Edward and Bella's daughter would end up having some sort of demonic ability.

"You stay out of my head, bloodsucker!" he demanded, pointing a condemning index finger at her.

"You are far too easy to play with." Her words stung venomously through his veins. Those milk chocolate orbs seemed to be able to stare passed his rough exterior and into his blackish heart with peculiarity. "What am I to you, Jacob? Do you really see me as a monster?"

"Monsters are holier," the man-wolf countered.

She furrowed both eyebrows, caught off-guard by his quick remark, and her determined attitude extinguished the tiniest bit. Jacob wondered, not in concern however, if maybe that was a little below the belt.

"Go on," Ren encouraged softly. "Tell me how you feel."

"You don't belong here—not with Leah, not with the pack, or even in this world, and I don't know how you fooled my friends and family into welcoming you, but I won't do the same. I will let you live for Leah, but I don't have to love you."

Renesmee shook her head to and fro, causing her coppery tendrils to bounce, and smiled warmly at Jacob—like she had at the restaurant and something in the shape-shifter's bitter spirit thawed. It was as though she looked at him that way countless times before, studying the very essence of his jaded soul whilst calculating his every motion.

Had she? Why? Why was she so damn familiar to him? Was it just his dream of her? How could he ache for an impossible knowledge? _Fuck_, Jacob cursed himself, _none of that matters_! It was all irrelevant.

The two strode forward, toward one another magnetically, and Jacob relaxed. In spite of himself, he noticed the sweet apple-blossom scent on the half-breed's porcelain flesh and disgracefully found something relieving about their proximity.

No! He hated her!

But the feeling would not subside so easily no matter how much Jacob tried to deny it.

The girl-woman wrapped a delicate hand around Jacob's left bicep. "That's okay. I'm not fond of you either and I don't want your friendship."

"Well, that makes the two of us, Cullen," Jacob stated matter-of-factually. He was smiling. Dear God, why was he smiling?

"Whatever you say, Jacob Black, whatever you say," she whispered sarcastically and went back to Leah's side. "So, anyway, I was thinking about plucking some flowers from my grandmother's garden and tying them together in a bouquet for you. How does that sound, Madge?"

"Wonderful, Ren. . ." the other woman answered awkwardly, almost in disappointment that their scene had finished in such a bizarre way.

However, the tension was maple syrup thick in the air.

"God, she's fucking annoying," Jacob said to Embry and Quil, who both rolled their eyes in blatant annoyance.

"Leah will tear you to shreds, pal." Embry chuckled jovially, slapping Jake on the back.

A confused expression then plastered itself upon Jacob's face, seeing his two friends smile at each other in a knowledgeable fashion, as if they knew something he hadn't caught on to yet. "What? Guys, what?"

Quil open his mouth, but then decided against it. "Nothin', man."

Renesmee giggled at something Leah said, the light and kind of endearing. Jacob decided that he hated undoubtedly her even more.

"By the way, Ren and Leah are the best of friends, but completely straight," Quil informed, earning a sharp nudge to the stomach from Embry's elbow. "Ouch!"

"Why the hell would that matter to me?" Then, a lightbulb switched on his head and then realized. . . He shoved Quil and Embry outside to Seth's back porch, glancing back at Renesmee every three seconds. "You think I'm attracted to that skinny, little brat? Are you kidding me, guys? _Me and her!_ Are you nuts or something?"

That was just a disaster waiting to happen.

Quil held up his hands defensively. "Hey, now! You and Ren are the ones going back and forth like the weirdest married couple I've ever seen!"

His supposition was laughable, preposterous, and nearly actionable. Quil obvious had gone off to La-La Land during Jacob's profession of hatred toward Renesmee two minutes ago, otherwise this conversation would have been nonexistent.

"Yeah. Jake, it's pretty clear you like Ren. You're either too dense to realize it, or your prejudices about vampires are too strong for you to just admit it out loud. After all, why else would you be checking her out? Seriously, bro, you haven't even imprinted on the poor girl, and you still can't keep your eyes off her," Embry said,waggling his eyebrows and leaned in closer. "You remember Collin and Brady, right? Well, both of 'em are just itchin' to bang Ren, too, so you're not alone."

"_What_?" the more muscular man inquired in absolute disbelief. This speculation was just getting worst. Now all Jacob wanted to do was knock some sense into Brady and Collin's heads with a toilet plunger. Several incoherent mumbles came flooding out of his mouth. They were wrong. There was no way he remotely liked, not even physically, that weirdo thing.

His cellphone rang in his pocket, and he answered it.

"_Do you miss me yet_?" came Lizzie's chipper voice. "_Even just a little bit_?"

"Terribly, Liz."

"_Then you should come back to Seattle, the place where you truly belong. You know what they say, 'you can't go home again,' remember? That's some true advice_," Lizzie begged. She was probably right, too. Every time Jacob thought to return to La Push over the years, Lizzie could always be counted on to talk some wit back into the weakening man. If only he had listened this time. . . "_You don't deserve their drama_."

Jacob's mouth managed to form a microscopic grin; he wanted to flee back to Seattle and pretend Renesmee Cullen never existed. "How do you know about all the drama?"

"_According to just about every sitcom ever made, family gatherings typically entail a platter of drama with a side of alcohol. Duh_!" Lizzie elucidated, giggling. "_Please, will you just come back? I miss you over here_."

"Hey, I'm not gonna be gone forever. You can hang there by yourself for a little while," he assured his friend. "It's just two weeks."

"_But what if you change your mind in two weeks, Jake_?"

"Trust me, Lizzie, that's not gonna happen."

"_Do you promise_?"

"Yes," Jacob half-lied. When he saw how Renesmee's raspberry mouth curved in a dimpled smile, he felt funny inside—warm—complete. A small part of him didn't want to miss out on getting to know her.

"_Fine, okay. Catch ya on the flipside, Jake_!"

"Later."

Renesmee and Leah joined the guys outside, the two best friends holding hands and smiling brightly. Jacob stifled a growl, but the halfling's too-close distance proceeded to stoke his rage, or at least a feeling that felt very similar to rage, as his feet became rooted to the ground.

He wanted to, he needed to, but couldn't force himself to move away. And damn it, she smelt wonderful—the single best scent his nostrils had ever come in contact with—and Jacob. . .

Jacob knew that he was definitely not attracted to Renesmee.

_I'm the smoke from your fire_

_I'm that lie you can trust_

_I'm the chord on your guitar_

_I'm that girl you can't shut up_

_I'm the blood you might need_

_In your car way and your speed_

_In that cigarette you breathe_

_You can't get rid of me_


	5. Stigmatized

**Disclaimer: Blerdeyblerdeybler... Nothing belongs to me. :P Song by the Calling!**

**A/N: Hope ya'll had a great Thanksgiving, or just a great Thursday if you don't celebrate that holiday. **

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><p><em>I can feel the blood<em>

_Rushing through my veins_

_When I hear your voice_

_Driving me insane_

_Hour after hour_

_Day after day_

_Every lonely night that I sit and pray_

"Hey, Quil, Embry, do you two want to go down to the beach?" Ren queried, inviting the men with a kind smile, not even bothering to make eye contact with Jake.

"What, I'm not even allowed to come along?" the werewolf asked, tapping his foot on the wooden floorboards.

Ren shrugged blithely, a light pink bra strap fell faintly from her shoulder and tried to discretely pull it back up as Leah replied, "Not if you don't behave yourself. You don't seem mature enough."

Embry cracked up, chuckling as Jacob whirled his head around, looking upon his deranged lunatic of a buddy with an inflamed stare, to which Embry rolled his eyes at. "What? That's a fair assumption, considering you haven't known Ren for five whole minutes yet and you've already made your mind up about her."

Jacob's ebony orbs fixated on the hybrid creature for the thousandth time that laggard afternoon, knowing Embry's statement held the utmost honesty. Not even Edward Pretty-Boy Cullen got him this riled up, but something about Ren's simple quality frightened the crap out of Jacob. And if his massive frame hadn't been swelled to the brim with haughtiness and pride, the dimwitted numbskull might have realized that he actually-

"Guys, come on. If Big and Grumpy over there wanted to attack me, I could fight him off," Ren reasoned, tucking a stubborn, copper lock of hair behind her ear.

"Sure you could, Cullen. Sure you could," Jacob mumbled under his breath.

"Let him come to First Beach if he wants to," she continued, positively ignoring any of his input. "He's not a threat to me."

"Guys!" Seth called from inside the house. "It's a beautiful day outside. Let's not waste it!"

Ren tugged Leah's elbow, pulling them back inside through the glass doorway. She glanced over her shoulder toward the three males timidly. "Jacob. . ."

"Yeah?"

"I know my opinion doesn't mean anything to you," she frowned ironically, "but for the record, I don't think you should let your resentment for me outweigh your love for your family and friends. Your other friend is wrong—you can go home again."

The befuddled werewolf didn't know what to think about this grotesque girl perpetually calling him on his, as well as Lizzie's, crap. The way she looked him made Jacob feel buck naked—exposed to a person he barely knew and had no intention of even wanting to know, but there she was in front of him. How could Renesmee see right into him?

Jacob should have just released of his deeply rooted anger; he should have concurred with Renesmee; he should have stopped battling everything his sincerely liked about her, but all he said in return was, "This isn't my home anymore."

"Hmmm. . . That would be perhaps true," Ren began softly, allowing her advice to sink into his conscience before he suddenly snapped at her, "if only you believed it yourself."

"Don't waste your breath, Cullen. Like you said before, I don't care about anything you say," Jacob retorted and finally enabled his brick-bound feet to move at least two inches away from the half-breed menace.

"Hey, take it easy, Jake. Ren was only trying to help you out, but your big head is so far up your ass, you can't even calm down for a split-second," Leah said in a ferocious tone, locking her knees in place and adorned an agitated glare.

"Leah," Renesmee murmured warmly; Jacob mentally flinched, his russet skin suddenly sizzling at the remembrance of her flower petal touch upon his hand and realized how could he felt without her. Although, it was not a state of longing, simply a. . . an oddity that he couldn't describe quite yet. He did not feel any type of magnetic pull in Renesmee's direction. "His words won't harm me." She set her candy bar gaze on Jacob, her natural enemy. "Whatever I am to you, Jacob, you are ten times the same to me. So—come, don't come. I couldn't care less. Let's go, Leah."

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><p>Jacob abhorred the flavor of beer on his taste buds and couldn't understand were so easily addicted to the awful liquid, but he supposed the slackening of his a few temperamental emotions could be considered silver lining. On the bright side, he could sit around a roaring fire on First Beach with old-time buddies and laugh a little. The jubilant environment assisted to tranquilize Jacob's acrimonious mood, even if it did reheat every couple of minutes when his eyes accidentally landed on the half-vampire half-human monster.<p>

Renesmee hadn't wanted to hang around with chuckling wolf pack, scarfing down smores and hotdogs. Instead, the wondrous creature contented herself to a walk down the path of the vague shoreline, wrapped in a gray cotton jacket, and did it without Leah following her. Jacob found this bizarre, when Renesmee appeared like a social butterfly, yet she was alone. A part of Jacob, his ever-concealed compassionate persona, wanted to trail after Renesme, make sure she was okay.

Leah sat down on log, next to Seth and across from Jacob, grabbing a cold beer. "Boy, I am definitely due for one of these babies. I'm so thirsty!"

"Hey. What's up with Miss Swamp Creature doing all the way over there?" Jacob inquired, attempting to come across casual.

"I don't," Jacob replied evenly and quickly. "Just making some conversation."

"If you must know then, Ren always wanders up to the cliffs by herself. She goes up there to relax, to think, to just sit on the edge," the Native American woman gesticulated nonchalantly.

Jacob had to laugh at that. What peace could be discovered on a dusty cliff? He glanced over to Renesmee, whom disappeared behind a family of spruce trees, and snorted. Every aspect of her nature seemed frivolous.

"Weird."

"But I think it's cute, though," Leah remarked, beaming. "I mean, just look at her, Jake."

"Yeah, he's having a real time doing that, Lee," Sam Uley commented under his breath, laughing inaudibly alongside Embry and Quil.

Leah shook her head. "I'm serious! You know that face she makes."

"You mean that dreamy, someday-my-prince-will-come-esque look?" Brady asked, and Leah nodded. "Sure. If life was a black and white chick flick, Ren would look prettier than the usual, but you're bias."

"No, I'm not," Leah replied in offense. "You're just not seeing clearly. Just look at her, guys!"

Predictably, Jacob already was.

The vampire-human being stared up into the constellation of glimmering, alabaster stars, billions of them hanging in the indigo sky. She sat on the precipice, her milky legs swinging back and forth, with the cool wind holding those auburn spirals whilst her porcelain skin glowed mysteriously in the rays of the white sphere. It was the most alien sight Jacob ever beheld—to see a singular individual so sad and so serene at the same time.

_So beautiful_.

"What does she think about?" the shape-shifter wondered mistakenly aloud. When the words escaped his mouth, Jacob immediately wanted to retract them. He didn't care about Renesmee.

"Beats me," Leah retorted in sorrow. "Ren's always kept that a secret from me. I guess she treats that spot on the cliff as it were her diary."

"It looks like she's waiting for something," Jacob stated, examining Renesmee closer. _Maybe someone_.

He could tell that she was daydreaming, given the far-off shine unhidden in her milk chocolate orbs. If this story was a lovey dovey fairytale,Renesmee would have been standing on a grand balcony made of marble stone, dressed in peach petty coats and fancy lace. Or maybe, in a forgotten reality, Renesmee would have been there with a good friend to look out into the night sky's reflection in the ocean.

Renesmee arose and stepped off the cliff, falling into the cobalt water below. Fully clothed, too. Jacob had to admit to himself that the girl had some spunk.

"I hate it when she does that," Leah complained. "Alice always wants to murder _me_ afterward."

"She does that a lot?" he queried, quirking a black brow.

"Yup," Leah replied, popping the 'p.' "Renesmee took to the water like a mermaid when she was only three weeks old."

Jacob chortled—aware this fact wasn't really that funny—and slapped his knee. "She sure is a regular sea monster!"

All of a sudden, he felt his copper flesh being pulled taut between two sharp fingernails as Renesmee appeared. He grunted through his nostrils, pissed off—not because she hurt him, but that she had done that at all. Damn this girl!

"Haha! You're so freaking hilarious, I forgot to breathe!" Ren giggled sarcastically, dripping wet next to Jacob. Her tee shirt rode low, compressing her bosoms close together in an indisputably sexy way.

"First of all, Baby Cullen, if you touch me again, I'm gonna have to break your wrists. Second of all, it wasn't an insult this time."

"Oh, really then? What was it?"

"Just a commentary on your oddball routine that somehow Leah ends up taking the blame for," Jacob responded, keeping a neutral attitude. "So, don't get your panties in a twist?"

Renesmee leaned down to him—her lips were mere centimeters away from his earlobes—and the poor man-wolf felt her warm breath rush against the base of his throat. She hummed in delight, and Jacob momentarily pondered what he smelt like to her. Edible?

"I enjoy that you assume I'm wearing panties."

_Oh, shit_!

Jacob spluttered on a casual sip of beer, and released a sharp cough—this half-and-half thing didn't fight fair. Brady eyed Renesmee lustfully, emitting a teasing wolf whistle, receiving a punch to the arm from Collin.

"Renesmee Carlie Cullen, you'd better be kidding!" her imprinter cautioned, not in frustration but embarrassment.

"Either way, I don't want the image of your bare bottom seared into my the back of my mind." Jacob groaned, screwing the contours of his face in make-believe revulsion. He refused to allow himself fantasized about what Ren's round ass with a pair of jean-capris. But damn it, now it was all he could think of. "Ew, ew. . . Get away from me, Cullen."

Her eyes rolled in typical Edward fashion, and straightened her posture. Renesmee's soft cheeks changed to a nervous pink color, having just made an idiot out of herself, but Embry took pity on her, "Don't mind him, Ren. All of us _straight_ guys know you're drop-dead sexy."

Jacob grumbled sourly. "I resent that."

"Doesn't make you any straighter, man."

Ren sighed exasperatedly, and turned her attention to Leah. "Hey, Lee-Lee, I'm going to head home."

"Oh, okay. Do you want a ride?" Leah questioned, probably desperate for affirmation, and stood up.

"No, but thank you. I want to run and see if I can dry off. If Alice commit homicide on you, there's no way I could go on living," she replied, embracing Leah in a way that didn't remind Jacob of Sam and Emily, or even Quil and Claire.

Even if they shared a platonic imprint, a close sisterhood, the gesture of affection came off as half-hearted, insincere almost. It was blatant that Leah never wanted Ren to leave her side, but Ren just wanted to get home.

"I love you, Leah."

"Me, too, kiddo."

"See you later, guys!"

A choir of 'Bye, Ren!" and 'Catch ya later!' abruptly erupted from the crowd of shape-shifters and their imprints.

"Even Nessie needs her beauty rest, huh?" Jacob chuckled, half-joking and half-serious. He decided right then and there that his new nickname fit her perfectly, and was way less unoriginal than _Ren_. From then on, Jacob could call her nothing else.

But Renesmee's eyebrows arched in—astonishment, confusion, offense? Jacob wasn't sure exactly. Her fawn orbs widened; her heart pounded like a nato drum; her breath hitched painfully in her throat; and her hands balled into fists at the sides of her hips.

"What. . ." she muttered gently, letting out a pregnant exhale and blinked. "_What_ did you call me?"

"Nessie," Jacob repeated, wearing a devilish smirk. "Why? Does that bother you, Nessie?"

"My name is Renesmee," she scoffed, drawing out each syllable as though Jacob couldn't hear. "Ruh-nes-may."

"Don't care. Nessie suits you better," Jacob retorted in a mocking voice, and winked.

"It does not."

"Does to."

"Does not."

"Does to."

"_Does not_!"

"Does to infinity!"

"Does not infinity and beyond!"

"This isn't Toy Story, Nessie!"

Nessie pouted, glowering dangerously with her feathers all ruffled up. Now Jacob knew why Jared enjoyed antagonizing Kim most of the time. "Renesmee! It's Renesmee! If don't like it, just call me Ren or stick to calling me by my last name."

"No can do. I'm gonna stick to Nessie, whether you like it or not. NessieNessieNessieNessie!"

_Tease me_

_By holding out your hand_

_Then leave me_

_Or take me as I am_

_And live our lives_

_Stigmatized_


	6. Come On Get Higher

**Disclaimer: Nothing in the following story belongs to me. Come On Get Higher by Matt Nathanson! :D**

_And I miss the sound of your voice_

_The loudest thing in my head_

_And I ache to remember_

_All the violent, sweet, perfect words that you said_

_If I could walk on water_

_If I could tell you what's next_

_I'd make you believe_

_I'd make you forget_

_His dark chocolate eyes searched deep through the spellbinding contours of the young woman's face, trying to find any signs of reluctance or terror, but alas, she was sure that she absolutely wanted him; she needed him. And dear Lord in Heaven, Jacob wanted to give everything he owned to his new bride—his right arm, his tongue, his whole heart, his soul, his own self. . . All of that was secondary compared to her._

"_Jacob," she muttered nervously, extending her silken touch to caress is russet cheek, and grazed a thumb underneath his lower eyelashes. "I am completely in love with you."_

_He brushed his lips against the pink palm of her warm hand, letting his large frame hover over her dainty one, as his imprint's calculating eyes studied him with love and lust. "You have no idea how much I love you."_

"_Then. . .Will you show me?" she questioned, a content sigh emanating from her chest, purring like a hungry feline. "Please, Jacob?"_

_Jacob leaned down, pressing their naked chests together, as made sure not to squash her beneath his well-built figure, and molded their mouths together in a beautiful, vigorous kiss. Two sets of lips moved like eager ocean waves licking at the surface of the shore, investigating the invigorating taste of one another. _

"_Love me, Jacob," the woman whimpered. "All I want from this world is for you to love me."_

"_I do, baby. I already do, so much that it hurts and I always will," the shape-shifter vowed solemnly; although, he was grinning affectionately down at his wife._

"_You want hold back from me?"_

"_I wouldn't dream of it, babe."_

"_Good, I'm glad," she said breathlessly, smiling that gorgeous smile._

_Jacob's long digits trailed up from the base of her slim elbow, softly teasing the smooth skin, lacing their ardent hands together like copper and white fabrics. A delicious blush painted the hybrid from head to toe._

_Life was perfect._

_They belonged together—like blooming flowers in the springtime, like golden rays in the summertime, like fresh rain in the falltime, like albescent snowflakes in the wintertime. Like the seconds in a minute, like the minutes in an hour, like the hours in a day, like the days in a month, like the months in a year, like years in a lifetime. _

_Like for eternity._

"_You can't ever go away."_

"_Never, Jacob, never. For as long as you want me around, I will always be here," she promised, squeezing their fingers together. "No matter what happens, nothing will ever keep us apart."_

"_Nessie. . ." His Nessie, his beautiful forever. "Always. I need you always."_

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><p>The wolf awoke with a startled heartbeat, his attuned ears catching the sound of twigs snapping in half and leaves crackling, and he rolled his eyes when he realized that the noises were coming from two mediocre hunters. Jacob arose from the dirty forest-floor, yawning inaudibly. He fought the augmentative impulse to murder the imbeciles responsible for interrupting him from an otherwise peaceful dream.<p>

Breaking out into a full sprint, Jacob escaped the approaching hunters. It was impossible for them to catch up; they weren't competent enough to outsmart Ephraim's heir, he thought arrogantly. He doubted they could sneak up on a dying snail, let alone a horse-sized werewolf. And so, Jacob ran—ran faster than the brisk breeze could blow, and journeyed all the way to Takoma, also known as the City of Destiny.

And as the City of Destiny would will it to be, the little brat of a freakish nature would be preying upon an unsuspecting stag. She had a rapturous twinkle in her magnificent mahogany irises, entirely focused on her crimson feast mere yards away.

Nessie crouched down low to the cold ground, readying herself to pounce, but then a mischievously genius inkling presented itself in the forefront of Jacob's mind—he would jump out from his vantage point and scare the mighty buck away, leaving the vampire-human girl's throat to scorch. If any human hunters chose to come along, maybe Nessie would accidentally get their blood. Then, he would finally sink his dagger-like fangs into her creamy skin.

However, it was perhaps wishful thinking.

Of course, Jacob had not bet on the fact that his Mount Everest-sized ego would blind him from the forgotten bear trap in front of him. Alas, when his right paw moved to step downward, the device clamped shut around his furry leg.

_Oh, fuck!_

A pained bellow sounded from the injured canine, howling as the trap's teeth devoured his flesh, and the elk sprang away in fright. Subsequently, Nessie turned around, groaning her apparent irritation.

"You have got to be freaking kidding me!" Nessie yelled, stomping her foot and planted a fist on her hip. "You overgrown fox thing, I should shoot you with Grandpa Charlie's rifle, beat you to death, turn you into a throw rug, and then shoot you again!"

Jacob lifted his upper lip slightly, exhibiting his pearly white fangs. He would have growled at her, too, but when he attempted to do so, the noise quickly transformed into a pathetic whimper.

"Well, that serves you right for stalking me."

Stalking her? Yeah, right. She wishes.

_Oh, for fuck's sake, please just strike me where I stand. Do it, do it now!_ Jacob pleaded, wishing the hunting tool would magically come loose, but no such luck existed. He was here, left to rely on his worst enemy, and judging by the mammoth vein popping out of Nessie's forehead, she didn't seem very compliant. Yep, Karma loathed Jacob to pieces, but loved Nessie for some reason. _Crap, damn it!_

He whimpered again. It hurt, it hurt like a son of a bitch.

"Here, hold still. . ." Nessie warned. On instinct, the distrustful shape-shifter jerked away—an unintentional feature, however—and in turn, the trap bit deeper into his skin. "Do you want my help or not, Jacob? Perhaps, you actually want a courageous hunter to walk by and take pity on your sorry ass?"

Jacob gave her one, curt nod.

"Smart choice."

Nessie ripped off a piece of her lavender sweater, pursing her lips carefully, and tied the clot in a knot around her face, similar to the way a physician would before going in for surgery. The werewolf tilted his giant head in perplexity.

"I hope you don't think—well, I suppose you already do—but I think you smell positively, um, divine," the half-breed confessed, putting her slender fingertips on the bear trap's clamp, easily prying it open thanks to her vampire strength. Jacob's paw was at last freed from its metal prison, blood drenching his thick, auburn pelt. "Better now?"

Jacob raised his shoulders, then put them back down—a shrug—and went to go hide behind a tree, where a pair of shorts had been laid down.

* * *

><p>Morphing back into a mortal form, Jacob emerged from the streaming sunlight of the forest trees, and found his Nessie—no, Leah's Nessie. . . perched on a collapsed tree trunk.<p>

Was she actually waiting for him? Why would she do that?

"Hey, um. . ." Nessie's timid voice trailed off, furrowing her eyebrows at the ground covered in a blanket of red and brown leaves, and then briefly glanced at his healed arm. "Are you—are you all right?"

Jacob nodded, remaining unmoved and simply observed the gentle way Nessie's hands trembled as she pealed away the torn bit of a clothing. "So, I smell good to you, huh?"

"Embarrassingly so," she retorted, her cheeks changing a faint cherry-pink. "All you wolves smell delightful to me, to be honest, but you, Jacob, smell delectable." Nessie punctuated the end of her statement by swiping her pink tongue along the length of her nether lip. "I don't know why I told you that last part. Sorry."

"Sure, sure," the Quileute lone wolf responded, grinning coyly. "I mean, that is really gross that a leech wants to suck _my_ blood, but whatever."

"Okay," Nessie replied uncomfortably. "I guess I'll see you around, Jacob. B-" She stopped short, attentively listening to the mumbled sounds unintelligibly spinning out of his mouth like they lost their way. "I'm so sorry. I didn't quite catch that. Would you say that again, please?"

He sighed exasperatedly. "Th-thank you," Jake stammered, tripping over his egotistical tongue. "You know, for helping me out ago."

Nessie playfully punched him on the arm, winking slyly. "You're welcome. What are you doing all the way in Takoma anyway?

"Just browsing the area." _Cool, cool. Be cool, Jacob. _"I haven't quite learned how not to phase yet." He cleared his throat, stifling a cough. "How about you?"

"I live in Takoma."

Huh. That made sense. The Cullens couldn't be to live far away from Forks or La Push, considering Leah would never tolerate to be even a whole state away from her eight year-old imprint. And, Jacob presumed, Charlie Swan was still somewhat significant to Bella.

And then, a peculiar thought came to mind—a question that silently pondered his many other curiosities, or at least the ones centering around Renesmee. Yesterday, it had not been his first encounter with this miniature demon.

"Nessie?"

"My name is Renesmee."

"I still don't care," he remarked sneeringly with a matching scoff. "I was just wondering something."

"Fine, what?" Nessie queried indulgently.

"Do you remember the day we met?" he asked, suddenly nervous as he shifted his weight from one foot to the other. His cheeks grew abashedly inflamed. "It was about a week ago, at a cafe."

Renesmee smiled, a smile so mesmerizing and bright, the sun itself would go blind. "You remembered me. Should I be flattered?" Her question was rhetorical, beginning to twirl a chaotic, bronze tendril round her fingers. "I dare to say that you liked me then."

If only Jacob could simply admit. . . Instead, he emitted a defensive snort. "No. Never."

"Yeah, sure." The half-human half-vampire took three long strides forward, bringing herself dauntingly closer to him, and criss-crossed her arms over her plump breasts in amuse. "You hate it, don't you? It just burns you all the way down to the core of that gilded heart you have there! Jacob, I. . ." she trailed off, chewing her bottom lip. "I know you—I know you don't hate me."

"The hell I don't! When I see you, I want to hurl my guts into the nearest trashcan and rip my eyes from their sockets. What does that tell you, Nessie? That I'm in love with you? Get over yourself," Jacob answered, his oak irises darkening nefariously.

"Whatever helps you sleep at night, wolf boy," she muttered ironically.

But as Renesmee turned to walk away, Jacob's massive fingers spontaneously soared outwardly to wrap around the girl's wrist—firmly, yet gently as possible—and sandwiched her between his sin-kissed body and a tree.

Her soft, Hershey eyes expanded slightly in a momentary stupor. Jacob had no idea either what the hell he was doing. When Renesmee's strawberry-scented breath brushed vaguely against is yearning lips, the sensational, lustful _disease_ flourished brilliantly throughout the frosted chamber of his lonesome heart. Being this near to Nessie, feeling her breasts move to exhale timidly against him, was an electric thrill.

Their lips were mere inches apart. Jacob could almost soak Nessie in.

"I should throw you to the wolves," Jacob threatened menacingly, his baritone voice reverberated through the leaves.

A wicked, smug simper plastered itself on Nessie's shell-pink lips, looking her reluctant companion dead in the eye. "Anytime you want to throw me to the wolves, I dare you to attempt such a thing." Nessie pressed her slim figure just a bit closer, tilting her head to the right, and brought her lips only two centimeters away—teasing him, seducing him, and playing him like a fiddle. Before Jacob leaned in all the way, she ducked beneath his arms, murmuring like a soft air into Jacob's ear. "You might be surprised by which one of us gets eaten."

Jacob turned around to face Renesmee, arching a challenging, midnight eyebrow. "There's no way you could beat me!"

"Why is that? Because I'm a girl? Or because I'm part-human?"

"Because good always wins over _pure evil_," he countered witted, simply joking with her.

Renesmee jeered mockingly. "Really? You wanna go there, Black? Let's go there."

Jacob blinked. Did she really want to spar with him, a werewolf? How taboo, how beguiling. "Are you sure, Nessie? Leah will kill me after I kill you.

"Ha, lovely. You're too chicken." The hybrid stated, purposely provoking Jacob's easily enhanced temper. She tucked her hands underneath her armpits, flapping her arms and bucked like a hen.

"Fine! You know what? Screw Leah! I'm to wipe the floor with you!" Jacob lunged at her. But faster than his eyelids could blink, Nessie was already standing ten feet away.

She yawned, followed by a reechoing giggle. "You won't hold back from me?"

Soundlessly, something dangerous welled up inside Jacob's chest and then beat.

"I wouldn't dream of it, babe."

_I miss the pull of your heart_

_I could taste the sparks on your tongue_

_I see angels and devils_

_And, when you come on_


	7. So Contagiously

**Disclaimer: Ya'll know the drill. Song by the Acceptance!**

**Author's Note: I usually don't like to switch POVs in the middle of stories, but a lot of important things are about to start happening when Jacob isn't there—mostly, just conversations. Would you lovely reviewers mind? Anywho, R&R!**

* * *

><p><em>Oh, no<em>

_This couldn't be more _

_Unexpected_

_And I can tell that I'm been moving in _

_So slow_

_Don't let it throw you off _

_Too far_

_'Cause I'll be running right behind you_

See, Jacob had given head to at least five, respective women in his twenty-five years of life; and while the experience was typically educational, it was never as arousing as he would have figured it to be. This, however, was definitely more exhilarating than he ever hoped—having Nessie's strong thighs draped over his large shoulders, tightly wrapped around the Native American man's thick neck felt so very. . .

Well, it was a weird defensive maneuver admittedly, but a teeny-tiny fraction of Jacob's lower brain thought he'd like wrestling even more if she stripped her bluejeans away into the ground.

"Give up yet, Mister Hyde?" she queried, elevating her pelvis towards Jacob's face to get a firmer grip.

"Not a chance, Cullen," Jacob countered fiercely.

Finally, he wedged his way out of the woman's tunnel of smooth gams and lady bits, and rolled their bodies over so Renesmee was trapped underneath him. His rough hands had her wrists pinned down to the dirt, feeling her soft breasts arch gracefully into his exposed chest. And for an instant—the earth stopped spinning on its axis—when the muscles of Jacob's brawny structure started to diminish.

He saw into her, as deeply as she could see into him. It was just for a fleeting second that he wasn't afraid of himself and Renesmee.

_What are you doing, dude? She is Leah's imprint, your arch nemesis' daughter, a half-vampire, for crying out loud! You can't do this! What? No, no. She means nothing to you! Get a grip, man. You've got nothing to worry about._

Without thinking, Jacob's mighty grasp loosened around Nessie—a mistake—as those brown orbs whispered devious intentions to his own, again switching their positions.

"You're treading dangerous waters, Jacob. Be careful," Nessie instructed, straddling his waist. Her reddish-brownish tendrils cascaded from the roots of her head like a penny-colored curtain; the flaxen sunlight poured all around her as she laid an alabaster hand upon his russet cheek.

"_Jacob_," she murmured through the thin crevices of his mind, utilizing her strange ability. "_Be careful_."

"Why?" was all he could ask in consequence, astounded and stupefied by her angelic appearance. "Tell me."

Renesmee simpered down at him courageously, and lifted herself from her placement, standing up. "You know why, Jacob?" She extended a hand for him. Of course, being the dictionary definition of predictable, Jacob rejected her assistance to get up on his own for a change of pace. "Then again, maybe you don't."

"What is it that I'm supposed to know?" Jacob queried expectantly, dusting up the legs of his khaki shorts.

She laughed nonchalantly, and answered, "That I just won the match."

Jacob snarled violently, leaping forward to attack Renesmee when she became too arrogantly off-guard, but his monumental build caused both of them to tumble over and down the vast, steep hill together. They stopped when Jacob's body smacked against the base of an obese tree trunk—_Thud!_—with a screeching Renesmee once again on top.

"God, that sucked," he groaned irritatedly, jostling Nessie off, but at least there was a convenient pile of raked leaves to break her fall.

"You couldn't accept defeat like a man, could you? Oh, no! You just had to be a sore loser!" The half-breed shouted at him in make-believe anger, standing up. "Big oaf that you are. . ."

Jacob tried to stifle it the best he could, but the inevitable chortle bursting to the surface couldn't be halted. Auburn leaves became chaotically entangled through Nessie's copper locks, streaks of moist dirt printed all over her clothes, and her girly tee shirt was ripped up—giving Jacob a marvelously enticing view of the Nessie's navel. If it weren't for Nessie's classy Cullen background, she would have looked like one of those Playboy bunnies out of Embry's old, stolen issues.

"Damn, you look ridiculous!" he chuckled accusingly, gesturing up and down at her.

"_Me_?" she inquired incredulously, pointing to herself. "How about you? You're the one-"

"I know, I know. I'm the one who dragged you down here!" Jacob exclaimed, arising from the ground. "Nessie, haha, Nessie! I'm sorry!"

Nessie stamped her foot, but her shoulders, too, trembled in a fit of contagious giggles. "No, you're not, you liar!"

"You're right, this is too funny! You looked like a drowned rat!"

"Yeah?" Nessie quirked an inquisitive eyebrow, slumping either shoulder. "Well, I think you look like dirty, hairy wolf!"

"Very original," Jacob remarked sardonically. "Who're you taking insult lessons from, by the way? Aunt Blondie?"

"What is it with you and your relentless name-calling, Black? My aunt's name is Rosalie," Renesmee corrected, still laughing though. "You are first-class simpleton!"

"Thank you, thank you very much," Jacob commented in a voice that impersonated Elvis. They sat down together near the tree. "Man, some morning this has turned out to be."

"Tell me about it," the half-human half-vampire girl agreed whole-heartedly. "Today, I was planning to feed on some majestic elk's blood and maybe a bear or two. Then, you come along and spoil it all!"

Jacob grinned genuinely at Nessie, the light shining everywhere—putting the sun and all its stars to shame. "Are you upset?"

"No," she murmured, shaking her head to and fro. "Anger is far too heavy a burden to carry for long. Actually, Jacob I'm rather relieved?"

"Oh? For what reason?"

"Well, up until now, I perceived you to be some stone-cold, sullen, brooding monster, but I guess monsters don't laugh."

"Not true, Nessie. Haven't you ever seen a single Power Rangers episode? Those guys laugh all the time, albeit maniacally, but it's the same thing," the cynical shape-shifter retorted, stifling another onslaught of hysterical chuckles threatening to rumble from his lower abdomen.

"Of course not," Nessie replied, nudging her shoulder against Jacob's bare chest. "I mean,I prefer you this way.

The werewolf slanted his head to the side, confoundedly. "What way, Nessie?

Her plump, raspberry lips momentarily puckered, the interesting shape of her seductive mouth manufacturing a hesitant W, and damn it all to hell! A kiss always looked like a W. Still, Jacob's unmaintainable spirit further relaxed, traveling down a aphotic route amidst the beautiful brown of Nessie's eyes.

"When you can just be yourself. You know, with your guard down—not so defensive and stubborn," Nessie responded ever-sentimentally and ever-sweetly.

Jacob's concentrating ears listened cautiously to the light sound of Nessie's thrumming heart, and for a bantam nanosecond, there followed a lingering, deafeningly mortifying silence. _Bome, bome. Bome, bome. Bo-_

Had Renesmee's heart skipped a beat, or. . . or had his?

"Is that my mother's doing? Is she the one responsible for how you turned out?" Nessie questioned, piercing straight through the quiet. In return, Jacob's mood flared up, glowering at the youngest Cullen. "She's why you ran away. . ."

"My actions are my own, nobody else can force me to do anything. I left of my own accord to escape a home I could never truly have," the shape-shifter elucidated through gritted teeth and scooted an inch away.

"Jacob, we both know that isn't true. Everyone on La Push loves you, are so willing to forgive what happened in the past. Why can't you? Billy-"

"You-_You_ know Billy?" Crap, even Jacob's father, the one who initially warned him of the grotesque eccentricities of the Cullen cover, befriended a leech.

"Yes. For years now, in fact," Nessie answered. "He misses you, Jacob, more than you could ever know. I hear stories about you all the time—of your first steps across the shaggy rug in his living room, of your constant need to recreate and reconstruct old motorcycles, of how my mother punched you in face after a stolen kiss, and how you nearly got yourself murdered after rescuing Leah in the war with the newborn vampire army. I don't know you, Jacob, but I do know how your pack sees you." She expelled a breathy sigh, playing with a loose thread dangling from the torn seams of her shirt. "You're a hero."

Every single in hero had a tragic flaw—someone they would sign away their last breath for. For every Superman disguised as a nerdy journalist, there was the obliviously perfect Lois Lane waiting for a triumphant saving.

"There's nothing you can say that'll ever change my mind, Nessie. Seattle has been my home for eight years. I have good friends, a steady job, and an okay apartment. . ."

Jacob's excuse was bullshit. Actually, Lizzie Nesam, as dear a companion as she was to him, was not the sole reason he decided to remain in Seattle, nor was his underpaid mechanic job. Plus, that crummy shack that barely qualified as an apartment felt more similar to a cage than a home.

Nessie was right—go figure. It was Bella.

He couldn't go back home after she rendered him heartless like the Tinman, when Jacob clanged faithfully to Bella for so long for evidence of his fading humanity, only to surrender her own to a stupid, sparkling bloodsucker. Jacob lost his dignity, and there was no way he could face his former pack brothers again. At least, not rejoin them anyway.

How could Jacob expect for them to forgive him when he was unable to forgive himself yet?

And currently, here he was, alongside a young woman who was the spitting image of her father, and Jacob couldn't resist the man he so desperately wanted to be when she was around. But, he couldn't. He couldn't allow himself to ache for a feeling that could be easily severed, especially since—_Jesus Christ_—when there was Leah Clearwater to keep in mind.

"You could have a job on La Push, you already have good friends that would do anything for you, and perhaps you can make a few new friends," Nessie suggested nervously, shaking her head in disapproval at him. "Jacob, you have the power to recreate and reconstruct your _life_ here."

_What, and watch all those sappy wolves imprint on their soul mates while I rot alone? No way, forget it! No possible life is worth that pain! _But Nessie would know nothing of heartache and loneliness. Oh, no. Even if her feelings for Leah weren't at all romantic, those two still had forever to change their minds. Jacob, as soon as he learned to simply remain in a human form, wouldn't have that luxury.

"Why the hell do you care, Nessie? Huh? You don't know a damned thing about me!" Jacob growled, stood up from the ground, and she echoed his every footstep. He turned around abruptly, grabbing her around the shoulders, and it boggled it his brain eternally, as to why she made zero attempt to yank away from him when she made it clear before, Nessie could very easily escape. "You hate me, too! Remember that? You said so yesterday! Hate me, Nessie! I want you to hate me, I need you to hate me! Why don't you. . . ?"

"Because. . . I-I," Nessie stammered uncertainly. She licked those full, strawberry lips, eyeballing him as though he were a meal. "It's stupid, but I don't think it's fair for anyone to know a life without true happiness, including you, Jacob. It's strange, I'm completely aware of that, but," the girl-woman shrugged, "I feel. . . compelled to you somehow, like we were supposed to meet at the cafe that day."

"You know, Nessie, I don't get you," Jacob stated, feeling himself start to shake in frustration. If he wasn't careful, he would soon phase. She was the vampire-human incarnate of a rubix cube, to him. "You're not like anything I expected." A real mystery; he simply couldn't trust what can't be explained. God, it was so disorienting! Jacob wanted to be far away from Nessie, but at the same time, he couldn't be close enough.

"Jake," Renesmee said, gently sighing his name in amazement, and leaned into his rugged hold on her body.

"You are the most infuriating woman, vampire, _thing_ I have ever met!" he grumbled roughly, although it was meant to be half a compliment.

"You're insufferable," Nessie quipped quickly, running her slender digits through his cropped, jet-black locks of hair. "So, what are you intending to do about it, Jacob Black? Nobody is around to watch you slay me, the 'thing' as you so gracefully said before." But her words didn't correspond to her following action—letting her eyes flutter shut.

For the second time that morning, their lips were only centimeters separated. So deliciously close, Jacob sample the flavors of her breath. And this time, he lost himself to the urge and just went with it.

_Oh, you're everything I'm wanting_

_Come to think of it_

_I'm aching_

_On account of my transgression_

_Will you welcome this confession?_

_Could this be out of line?_

_To say you're the only one_

_Breaking me down like this_

_You're the only one_

_I would take a shot on_

_Keep me hanging on _

_So contagiously_


	8. Every Time We Touch

**Disclaimer: You know the drill. Nothing belongs to me. Song by Cascada!**

* * *

><p><em>Your arms are my castle<em>

_Your heart is my sky_

_You wipe away the tears that I cry_

_The good and the bad times_

_We've been through them more_

_You make me rise when I fall_

Jacob couldn't say what exactly came over him in that one, quick second. Maybe the anger burst into something all too physical. It hadn't mattered. The conclusion was the same. He crossed the line between foes and something more. If it turned out to be a big mistake, it's not like he could get a time machine and go back (and to be honest, Jacob didn't really want to). Despite the voice in the back of his head, shouting at Jacob to tear himself away from Nessie, the task became quickly too tedious. He wanted to stay glued to her like this.

It seemed like an entire millennium now that Jacob been waiting for the sparks in his impassioned heart to spread into a Greek flame, and it distraught him to no end that he, indeed, burned for this strange vampire-human creation. But God help him, because when his mouth entwined feverishly with Renesmee's, Jacob was immediately addicted to the sweet, fruitful flavor soaking into his mouth—capturing him in a wakeless, luminous, breathtaking abyss.

Jacob never knew it was possible to need someone so much in this way, just for a kiss.

He was the long drought, and Nessie was the miraculous raindrops falling from Heaven. He was the bleeding wound, and Nessie was the soft band-aid. He was the lost traveler drifting out into the spacious sea, and Nessie was the radiant starlight guiding him safely home again. He was the bleak prayer in the aphotic room, and Nessie was the humble Hallelujah. He was the bitter despair alone in his contempt, and Nessie was the hope that kept him wanting more from life. He was the determined fight, and Nessie was the almost bittersweet surrender—his white flag.

Jesus Christ, Jacob couldn't get enough of the tender caresses of Nessie's flower petal lips upon his own, in a naïve manner, and how she imprisoned him to the warmth of her arms wrapped around his broad shoulders; it had been nearly a decade since Jacob last felt the warmth of another being, considering he was roughly one hundred eight degrees—that's how he should have known the stop whatever the hell he was doing with Nessie. The comforting touch of their bodies together was too could to be true. Heaven was within Jacob's reach, and if he grabbed for it anymore, Nessie was sure to vanish forever. And damn it, Jacob wanted her.

Why did this kiss have to come so naturally, like second nature? Jacob felt like, instead of being born to lead Quileute Nation and be leader of the pack, he put on Earth for Nessie—a purpose beyond battling with vampires. Stupid, stupid, stupid. It was impossible.

His whole body felt the delicious impact of the younger woman's body pressed against his, from his stomach to his knees. In turn, as rough as he originally intended their kiss to be—punishing really—Jacob couldn't muster the strength to not attempt to be as gentle.

One of his hands cupped the back of Renesmee's head, molding their lips together eagerly. Again, that weird feeling of familiarity washed over him, and Jacob _needed _to know all about this girl. Why did she have this affect on him? How did he render himself putty in those bewitching hands to a person he loathed to the core? Ever word, every touch, every look resounded through Jacob's memory, attempting to solve the mystery to the questions Jacob kept asking himself.

It sucked to think that Nessie had set the impossibly high standard of how future girls must live up to, otherwise it would be a no-go. There was no logical explanation or proper description to label this moment, except captivating.

_Crap, I've lost my mind! This has gotta be temporary insanity! What's going on with me and this chick?_

She groaned, twister her head to give him better access to the shape of her full lips, and regretfully, Jacob was thankful for the gesture. The little noises vibrating from her on to him further spurred Jacob on. For being a bloodsucking abnormality, he could kiss her all day long permitted any sort of kindness.

However, life never once worked accordingly for him. Damn it.

"_Renesmee Carlie Cullen_!"

Nessie and Jacob simultaneously froze at the familiar sound of their inevitable interruption, their bodies withdrew reluctantly, and looked like two deer caught in the headlights. Automatically, Jacob's hand flew to the buzzing sensation of his lips, checking if anything was there.

"Muh-muh-muh," the half-vampire half-human stuttering, her nether lip jutting out in a small pout in a puppy-dog expression. "Mom! What are you doing here?"

Jacob took in the sight of the new Bella Cullen. Her eyes were no longer the comforting shade of milk chocolate, but now like honeycombs, and her skin glimmered blindingly in the sunbeams. But all the new vampire traits aside, she was still the same Bella. Yeah, still Bella. Although, her facial expression wasn't the normal blinking stare she adorned, but a livid one that was meant to intimidate.

"Leah called, wondering why you skipped out on lunch with her. I came to find you, worried sick because it's not like you to ditch your best friend, and—ugh! You're here!" she bellowed, pointing betwixt the shape-shifter and the half-breed.

"Mom, just chill out! Nothing even happened!" Renesmee retorted, glancing apologetically at Jacob.

"Really, nothing happened? It's just my imagination that I found my daughter making out with what can only described as a perfect stranger?Give me a break! Renesmee, I wasn't born yesterday," Bella said, tapping her foot impatiently.

"It was one kiss!" Nessie exclaimed defensively.

"Yeah, I'm sure one kiss made you look like a dirty slob." Bella shifted her accusatory, golden irises to Jacob in a squinty glower. "And you, Jacob Black, explain yourself."

Had Bella always been this hostile?

The Quileute native furrowed his eyebrows, folding his arms over his wide chest. "I don't have to explain myself to you, Misses Cullen. You're not my mother."

"Fine," she hissed, marching forward to him. "I'll just beat you to a pulp!"

He refused to give up his ground. "Try me." The shape-shifter couldn't control the primal growl erupting from his abdomen, unaware of the purpose behind his animosity towards his ancient friend.

Was it for Nessie?

Speaking of which, the porcelain hybrid moved to stand in the middle of the two. Jacob almost couldn't comprehend the vision—Renesmee protecting him from her own mother? "Hey, hey, hey! Everyone, let's take it down a notch! Mom, let's just go home!"

"You go on ahead, sweetie. I've got a bone to pick with my old friend here."

"Don't hurt him," she begged with desperate pupils.

If Jacob wasn't so insulted by Nessie's lack of—no—he was pissed because Bella wanted to tell him what to do and Nessie thought they could be more than just a harmless kiss, well, he would have been touched.

"Don't worry about me. I can take care of myself."

She looked at him in great concern. "Okay, if you say so." Nessie relented and started her journey home.

When she was out of earshot, Bella Cullen scowled darkly at Jacob, waiting, "Well?"

Jacob rolled his eyes. "Well, what? Gonna give me a lecture?"

"No," Bella dragged the syllable out the simple syllable in a slow snarl, fierce and steady. "Like you said, I'm not your mother. I will tell you this, though—you better stay away from my family."

"It's not your family I give a crap about, Bells." God. He despised the feeling of dread vampire Bella invoked in him, but he couldn't disregard the soft way his lips tingled with the lingering touch of Nessie's kiss.

Bella stepped closer. Her sickeningly sweet aroma assaulted assaulted the werewolf's nostrils. "Then, stay away from my daughter. Got it?"

"Just curious—what will you do to me? Huh? You don't have any power over me."

"Try this on for size, mutt. If you get any closer to Renesmee, you _will_ lose everything," she grumbled, her tone persistently dripping with scourge.

"Ooh, I'm shaking in my shorts," he replied mockingly. "Gotta say, threats aren't really your forte, Bells."

"Yes, and my eight year-old daughter isn't yours. So, seriously, back off," the vampire growled.

Jacob exhaled. He wanted to listen to Bella, and never ever get within a hundred feet of Miss Nessie Cullen. Everything, all the signs were telling him to walk away. Hell, Jacob didn't even like Nessie.

"No."

"Jacob, I'm serious! What is Renesmee to you anyway?" she inquired, becoming desperate.

His face skewed into something of dubiety. He could easily stated what his braincells knew to be the truth—nothing. Bella and Edward's half-leech daughter didn't mean a damn thing to him, but his swollen tongue struggled to get the words out. "She's. . . different."

And different Nessie was, in so many ways. Whereas Jacob was built from a coppery fiber, Nessie's skin gleamed like the moon on a dark night. Whereas Jacob was pure Native American, Nessie was all types of Caucasian. Whereas Jacob was basically a human with the ability to change his form into a wolf, Nessie remained two halves of a brand new species. They were born enemies for a reason—to collide, to hate, to terminate. Their D.N.A demanded it.

But still, Jacob nearly recognized the gentle crash of their lips, and he couldn't shake the feeling that he wanted to do that at least a trillion more time to sate him.

* * *

><p>Jacob's fingernails scratched at the wrapper around the soda bottle unconsciously, still deeply contemplating Nessie as he sat on Billy Black's old sofa; father and son watched a football game on television. It bothered him that, hours later, his stomach clenched when he recalled the chemical, magical electricity charging from the corners of Renesmee's mouth to his. What sucked, is that their kiss had been so innocent, lasting a good thirteen seconds, and all Jacob wanted to do was rewind to that moment and pause.<p>

It was stupid. Why couldn't Jacob stop thinking about Nessie? What was it about her that had him enraptured with the very thought of her? None of this made sense.

Billy sighed sheepishly, punching Jacob lightly on the arm and snapped him out of his trance. "Wipe that grin off your face, boy. I'm starting to think you have a thing for Peyton Manning."

Jacob had no idea he was smiling. . . No way! "Sorry, Pops. I just have something on my mind."

"Ren Cullen," Billy said casually, his black-brown eyes aged with knowledge. "I know. Rachel and Paul told me all about your denial over the phone."

"I'm not—I'm not in denial!" the werewolf exclaimed defensively.

"Oh. Then you've already owned up to your crush?" Billy questioned, simpering slyly.

"Crush?" Jacob's voice boomed in disbelief. "Wh-wh-what? Nessie is arrogant, stubborn, stupid—she thinks she knows everything about everything, she's a leech-"

"Yeah," Billy agreed sarcastically. "But let's talk more about her and less about you."

Maybe Jacob inherited his sense of authority from his father.

Jacob arched a singular, disinterested eyebrow. "Dad, it's not the way you think it is. There is nothing going on between Nessie and me, but pure hate."

"Sure, sure. C'mon, kid. Your mother broke my wrist the day you were born and don't forget I'm the one to defend you against Rachel and Rebecca when they wanted to dress you up like a Cabbage Patch Kid," Billy stated, waving his pointer finger around in the air matter-of-factually.

"Have you turned into a babbling old man or is there actually a point to this story?" Jacob queried impatiently.

"The point is, Jacob, I know you. Once you get around to listening to your heart, you'll figure out how you feel about Ren," Billy elucidated, smiling slyly.

"Her name is Nessie," Jacob corrected.

"You know, son. . . Sometimes I swear you're the eight year-old," the twenty-four year-old's father remarked with a bored shrug.

Jacob rolled his eyes.

_'Cause every time we touch_

_I feel the static_

_And every time we kiss_

_I reach for the sky_

_Can't your hear my heart beat slow?_

_I can't let you go_

_Want you in my life_


	9. I Don't Care

**Disclaimer: Nothing belongs to me. (Do you lovely readers ever even read this part of the fic?) Song by the Bratz... Don't judge me.**

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><p><em>I don't care what they say<em>

_I don't care what they do_

_Because they all fade away_

_When it's just me and you_

_Well, it's more than a crush_

_An impossible rush_

_I don't care what they say_

_When you're there_

_I don't care_

Two equally annoyed women came storming into the Cullen mansion, huffing and puffing at one another back and forth, while the others viewed the scene with perplexity. The youngest Cullen exhaled in infinite irritation, chewing her bottom lip like bubble gum, as her mother continued to scream her disapproval, "_I can't believe you did this and I can't believe you did that! You're only eight years old! Why are you acting like such a child? Blah, blah, blah, blah_!"

Renesmee marched into the wide kitchen, grabbed an apple from the refrigerator, and washed it in the faucet water; twisting the stem round and round, the peeved half-breed starting counting the alphabet on it.

_A. . ._

"I don't understand what your malfunction is about this whole thing, Mom. We never had this controversy when Nahuel and I were dating. One, simple kiss is not a big deal," Nessie said, tapping her foot against the tile.

She didn't appreciate the basis of this argument—who actually cared if she kissed Jacob or not? Her mother had no right to get overwhelmingly infuriated by a situation that honestly had nothing to do with her. Certainly, Jacob's love life was not of Bella's business either, after she gave up that right along time ago. They kissed—true, there was no forgetting that fact—so what? A momentary lapse of judgment wasn't necessarily the crime of the century. And Renesmee had been captivated by those measly, instantaneous seconds of pure bliss, jailed warmly inside the width of Jacob's toned, russet arms.

For a moment, Jacob had no barriers blocking Nessie from his frigid heart, and when he let her in, he did it completely. She preferred him that way—with no guard up or overbearing pride to dissuaded him from the truth of their troublesome dilemma. It was plain as day to everyone, save Jacob himself, that he was riled up so intensely when Nessie was around, only because he hated that he didn't hate her at all.

But Nessie knew—behind every action and reaction, there was some purpose. There was a magnetic attraction that pulled the Native American and the half-vampire half-human together, and Nessie couldn't find the strength within to ignore it—she gave up yesterday in Seth Clearwater's living room. She was weak to the sensation of disillusioned love that overcame her when Jacob looked at her. Eventually, Jacob was going to stop fighting his heart, and she would never reject him, because she liked him, too.

"You call me catching you with my old best friend's tongue down your throat not a big deal? You have got to be kidding me. Young lady, you've lost your marbles," Bella stated crossed her arms over her chest and scowled darkly.

Edward spat in astonishment. "What?"

"Alright, Little Rennie! You go, girl!" Emmett applauded his niece, and clapped her on the back roughly. "Who's the lucky guy?"

_B, C. . ._

"Jacob Black!" Bella answered, furrowing both eyebrows, repulsed by the memory. Her face twisted into an expression Renesmee couldn't quite figure out—one of dread and trauma, something she recognized, but still couldn't remember. Renesmee's body trembled strangely, wondering what secret her mother kept locked away.

Was she. . . Was she still in love with Jacob? Could that be possible?

Both Edward's and Rosalie's jaws dropped to the floor, topaz irises flourishing wide—disgusted, dismayed, and disapproving. "What!"

_D, E. . ._

"First of all, Mom, you're blowing this way out of proportion! Second of all, you're such a hypocrite! _I_ didn't make out with Jacob in the middle of some vampire war; _I_ didn't let myself be manipulated into a teenage boy's obsessed fantasy; and _I_ most definitely didn't cheat on anybody in the process. Third of all, Jacob's tongue was nowhere near coming in contact with my throat—we never frenched. It was completely innocent."

Rosalie grimaced. "You still let that over-sized husky slobber all over you. That explains the wet dog body odor. Gross."

_F. . ._

"Why the heck is everyone getting their underwear in a twist over this? Jacob and I, we kissed. Yes. Once, and probably never again." Renesmee shrugged using her hands, bored with the conversation. It was none of their concern about who she kissed. "I am an adult now and I'm perfectly capable of making decisions independently—without any of you poking your noses where they don't belong."

Besides. . . Nessie couldn't simply neglect the way her skin buzzed, blazing immensely and consummately, whenever Jacob looked upon her with those black-brown orbs, and she anticipated what words he would say then. Every time he called her Nessie, her stomach filled with monarch butterflies and it was a miracle how she didn't transform into a puddle of soppy goo at his feet.

She had never felt like this way for anyone before—it was devouring her avariciously, forcing her to a bittersweet, poisonous resignation—and within meeting the would-be Alpha, Nessie knew no one but him would ever grant her the crazy shakes and shivers perpetually vibrating deliciously up her spine. It was peculiar, she was well aware of this, but it couldn't be thwarted effortlessly. In Jacob's absence, Nessie pine after something—someone—she never even had.

Jacob's voice boomed, sounded and resounded, echoing constantly in the back of Renesmee's mind, sending her heart sky high, and blasted Artemis and Myriah's catastrophe completely out of the burning stars. And his laugh! Her knees wobbled at the memory.

For most the young half-breed's life, even with a lovey-dovey family, amazing friends, and the ever-magnificently beautiful Leah Clearwater, there was always that out there, somewhere, there was a piece missing. She couldn't explain why she thought there was a void unfilled. Maybe it was always being around happy couples and believing she would never know true love in that aspect with Leah or Nahuel. (Breasts and vaginas weren't Nessie cup of tea—Leah would never be more than her best friend—while Nahuel, for as much as Renesmee wanted to fall in love with him, attraction was assuredly lacking in their relationship).

And then Jacob appears out of the blue one fine day, and suddenly Nessie doesn't feel so incomplete again, as though, despite the hardship of his denial, they _could _share the real thing. Oh, who was she trying to fool? Nessie was already falling head over heels for the jerk.

She really wanted to kiss him again, no matter Bella's wrath might ensue.

_G. . ._

"Including the stupid ones?" Bella inquired, impatiently sighing. "Renesmee Carlie, you're behaving foolishly. This isn't like you!"

Nessie's face contorted into an expression of great offense. "Maybe I want to behave foolishly for a change, Mom! I have never done one, crazy thing in my entire life. I do that today, and all you can do is judge me!" Nessie complained lividly, her complexion turning carmine, shaking her head.

"Watch your tone with your mother, young lady," Edward scolded, his dark eyebrows rolling down his face. "How could you kiss a total stranger? Especially one that wanted you dead?"

The half-human half-vampire's chocolate eyes shot her father a furious glare. "As the story goes, you were no better," Renesmee countered, lowering her voice dangerously. _Monstrosity, aberration, abomination, it_. . . Edward Cullen hadn't played a large part in keeping his own daughter alive, which she had come to terms with a thousand times over; she never asked to be born. "Ugh, I can't believe this! Jeez, is this about Nahuel? Because I didn't choose him? I stray off the road you two want me on forever just this once, and you think it's doomsday! Well, guess what? I don't need your stupid road! This is _my_ life."

The very notion of going a whole day without at least hearing Jacob Black's voice scared her half to death, feeling that empty space again. . . Nessie knew that at the moment he didn't want anything to do with her, but she recognized that look of recollection in his red wood eyes—he wouldn't have kissed her if that wasn't the case. She would never stop trying to get to know Jacob for who he was underneath that broken-man exterior. Nobody could stop her, especially not her parents.

"Sweetheart, you just met him," Bella stated evenly, softening her stance.

_H, I. . ._

It didn't seem like that. Nessie swore that she must have known Jacob in another lifetime, as if she belonged somewhere in his chaotic world the same way he did in hers. But that was silly.

"Yeah, you're right. I did, and I did something I thought I would never do. Why are you so determined to steal that from me?" Nessie inquired.

"Jacob is only using you to get to me, to make me angry. You're just a device to him. He cares nothing for you, Renesmee," her mother retorted.

"Woah, easy on the ego trip there, Madre. The universe isn't a big enough place that yet," the half-human half-vampire remarked with a snort.

At last with a sharp snap, the thick stem cracked away from apple when she came to the letter _J_. Nessie smiled to herself, guessing that would be the outcome. Apples were known at the fruit of wisdom, and it must have predicted the twice-woven destiny that awaited Renesmee Cullen and the reluctant Jacob Black.

"Don't make us ground you!" Edward threatened emptily; her parents never did anything more than stick their daughter in a corner and force her to stare at a blank wall for ten minutes whenever she got herself into trouble. "No, this time I'm serious! We really will ground you!"

"So, ground me," Nessie shrugged nonchalantly. Apparently, her father ignored her declaration of independence before—you couldn't exactly ground an adult. "But whatever this is with Jacob, there isn't a thing anyone can do to keep from finding out."

"Renesmee, you will not go near Jacob again, do you hear me? Your defiance will not be tolerated in this household. This is a frivolous infatuation!" Edward placed a consoling hand on his wife's shoulder to keep her from ripping up Esme's new dinner table. If it were possible, steam would have been coming out of Bella's ears.

With salty tears stinging her sorrowful brown eyes, all Nessie could do is stare at both of her parents in pain. Had they not risked their very lives for love once upon a time? Neither of them could possibly know what was going on inside her heart when Jacob came near. Not even her own mother—the same woman who ignored her own father's request to never see Edward again—wanted to comprehend the depth of what Renesmee was so close to having in her life now, nor did Bella care.

She ran upstairs to her room, slapping the door behind her.

* * *

><p>Leah dropped by the Cullen residence, as per usual—her senses forever honed in on her imprint's conflicting emotions. It damn nearly broke her heart to see Ren's pretty brown eyes flooded and reddened with pained tears. She rocked the young girl back and forth like an older sister, allowing Ren to sob into her shoulder.<p>

"Ren, they're just trying to protect you from Jacob. In two weeks, he's going to return to his life in Seattle, and I doubt you'll be able to change his mind in such a short amount of time." Leah pulled away then, holding her soul mate's chin in her palms. "Beautiful, you wanna tell me why you're so hung up on this one guy?"

Renesmee flopped on her comfy mattress, sniffling sadly, and groaned exaggeratedly. "I don't know, Lee. . . I can't stop thinking about Jacob. This is all my mother's fault."

"What makes you say that?"

"Well, you know how my overprotective family wants to move within the next year? Last week, my mom volunteered me to go scout for a new place, so I chose Seattle. Jacob and I met in a little cafe," Renesmee confessed, staring up at the ceiling fan. "He liked me, Lee, before he discovered who I really am."

Leah exhaled awkwardly, eyes widened in shock. "Wait. . . For the past week, Jacob's the reason why you've been walking on air? Wow, okay. It's hard to believe that Edward didn't pick up on that." Actually, it wasn't. Although, Nessie wasn't a shield like Bella, but she normally thought of song lyrics to keep him from intruding in on her mind.

"Yeah. . . He is by far the most adorable man I have ever met," Nessie replied honestly, her tears drying. She simpered jovially to herself, blushing magenta.

"What? Has Jacob truly topped Brady's chicken impression?" Leah questioned, poking Ren's belly tenderly, causing the young girl to giggle.

"Definitely. I get dizzy whenever Jacob smiles."

The Quileute woman combed her copper digits through her imprint's bronze bangs, affectionately smiling down as Renesmee stretched out her arms. Sighing, Leah's mouth slanted in dubiety. "I'm kinda jealous."

Nessie blinked. "Why?"

"Because you're my best friend, kiddo, and you've already cooped yourself up here in this room because of him. I don't want that dense bastard to steal you away from me. I don't wanna share you with a guy that doesn't deserve you. Don't get me wrong, though. Jacob's like a distant, never-seen brother to me, and I wish him a lifetime of happiness, but he could never be adequate protection."

"I can take care of myself, Lee," Nessie replied sweetly, grinning. "I love you, don't you know that? I have my whole life, and Jacob Black will never ever change that, okay? No man will," Renesmee vowed, sitting up as she held Leah's hand close to her heart and kissed it. "Hey, we're soul sisters."

"You mean that?"

"Of course!"

"Good. How about I sneak you outta here? We've gotta go shopping with Marguerite for some dresses." Leah winked; Nessie grinned.

"Sounds like a plan!"

_Tell me stories_

_Paint a picture_

_Hang it in the sky_

_Tell no lies and keep no secrets_

_Time stands still as days go by_

**A/N: If you're confused about the apple thing, it's an old myth that I learned when I was five. You twist the stem around, reciting the letters, and whatever letter it breaks off it is the first letter of your future husband's name. Anywho, back to Jacob's POV next chapter. R&R!**


	10. Painting Flowers

**Disclaimer: Nothing belongs to me, but thank you for reading! You all are wonderful! This next song belongs to All Time Low.**

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><p><em>Strange maze, what is this place?<em>

_Hearing voices over my shoulder_

_Nothing's makin' sense at all_

_Wonder why do we race_

_When every day we're running in circles?_

_Such a funny way to fall_

"_No!"_

_A glass-shattering scream rang into the silent forest trees, echoing through the shape-shifter's attuned ears, causing him to follow after the worst sound. He was more scared than he had ever been in his whole life. Jacob lost it; he had let the connection to his imprint slip right out of his hands. Damn it, he could feel his heartbeat pound horribly in anxiety, ready to leap out of his chest, and was just about ready to palpitate._

_Where the hell could that women be?_

_He sprinted, moving his feet faster than he ever had before and raced with the whistling wind until he discovered a vision that would haunt him forever—a pale mother holding her pale daughter. Jacob's heart sank at the sight, and he couldn't find the strength to even stagger forward. It was hard to believe any of this real, but it was. There was no way to escape it._

"_No!" Bella Cullen cried out again, rocking her only daughter's motionless body back and forth. "Please! Come on, Renesmee, I'm here! Everything's okay, you can wake up! Wake up!"_

_But Renesmee stubbornly refused—her unblinking, lifeless brown eyes could do nothing but stare at the silhouette of the dying man watching over Bella. Her clothes were drenched in blood and there were purple bruises along the side of her face; but it was somehow clear to Jacob that, while it was sure to have been a struggle to remember, his wife had been poisoned with hind's blood._

_The female vampire dryly sobbed into the crook of her child's cold neck. "Jacob," Bella murmured, using two fingers to shut Nessie's eyelids, "they-they murdered her. . ."_

_Oh, God. . . His stomach churned tightly, bile threatening to boil over as tears trickled down his russet cheeks, stinging his eyes. This was hell. How could he let this happen to his wife? How could he let his Nessie to die in his place?_

_Jacob dropped to his knees beside Bella, stealing his Nessie into his arms, amazed by the icy touch to her skin. "You have to open your eyes, Ness. Do it for me. C'mon, I love you! I need you! Come back, Nessie!" he demanded, carefully shaking her shoulders. "No, don't you give up on me, Nessie! Don't you give up on me! Don't you give up on me!" His tears fell down to Renesmee's face, sliding down her soft cheek as his plea resounded into the humid air._

_Bella laid a hand on her best friend's shoulder, attempting to seek her own comfort. Her mouth opened, hyperventilating on her next statement: "It's no use, Jake. We lost her."_

"_N-n-no." Jacob replied, shaking his head in denial. "Bella, you can use your venom to change her! It doesn't have to be like this. Make her a vampire, too. You can-"_

"_I can't," she said, the words poked and prodded like daggers to an already open wound. "Her heart. . . Jacob, I'm sorry. You know I would if I only could, but it's already stopped beating. We were too late."_

"_No. . . No!" His voice roared, frightening a flock of crows out of a tall spruce tree, but it didn't matter. Nessie would never hear him, never again. _

_This had to be a dream. It must be a dream. Please, let this be a dream!_

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><p>Deep in his pocket, Jacob's cellphone vibrated, and awoke the napping werewolf with a start. His eyes fluttered open, remembering that he was in search for wedding attire alongside Seth and Marguerite. He must have fallen asleep, forever waiting for his pal to finish getting dressed. Once his brain jolted to action, Jacob reached for his phone and flipped it open to answer.<p>

"Yeah, hello?"

"_What's up, Jakey-Jake_?" He would know that sweet, soft voice anywhere, always giggling at him for unknown reasons. "_I sensed you were feeling homesick, so I took time out of my busy schedule to give you a call_."

Jacob lightly chuckled. "Color me grateful, Lizzie."

Lizzie expelled a sharp breath. "_So, how is dreary, ole La Push treating you, Jake_?"

For a minute, he pondered what his response would be. His heart thudded once in a strained, aching beat when a certain half-human half-vampire fleeted through his mind. Every pigment on his face turned crimson just thinking about her—how embarrassing. He could hear her soft peals of infectious laughter filling the air along with Leah and Madge.

"My life could be a lot worse. My buddy, Seth, has me dressed in some fancy-shmancy get-up."

"_I'm sure you'd look dashing in anything_," Lizzie replied, her smile heard crystal clear, even through a phone.

Jacob stood up from his seat, checking himself out in the mirror. He did look pretty spiffy, less rugged and more refined. "I do look rather groomed," the shape-shifter said in a British accent, "fit enough to be a best man."

"_Told you so. I am never wrong_," Lizzie sang mockingly.

"How are you?" Jake inquired curiously.

"_Bored to death without you. A gross, old customer slapped me on the ass, then he didn't leave a tip! I miss you, Jacob Come back, pretty please with mustard, turkey gravy, and cheese on top_?" Lizzie melodic voice begged.

"Gravy is pretty hard to resist," Jacob retorted, feigning weakness. A tiny, little voice in the back of his head told him that Nessie was much harder to resist. "Wish I could, Liz, by my word is solid."

"_Eh, I thought I'd at least take another whack at it_," she replied half-heartedly.

"I'm flattered for the effort," he told his friend.

"_That's what I get for having only one friend, I suppose_," the redhead sighed.

"Why don't you go visit your favorite place in the world? Chicago, right?" Jacob suggested. Lizzie was from Chicago, after all, and she spoke of it often—the winter snowflakes, the delicious food, the nice people. It was her home, or it would still be if her family still resided there."

"_I would love to if I could only get off work, but as it is_, I need this thing called money," Lizzie answered.

"Don't make me go Jessie J on your ass!" he jokingly threatened, followed by a long pause of silence. "We just wanna make the world dance! Forget about the-"

"_Tata, Jacob_!" Lizzie abruptly hung up upon hearing the off-key rendition of her 'Price Tag.'

Jacob laughed, shoving his cellphone back in his pocket as Seth walked out of the changing room, clad in a beige tuxedo with a black tie—same as Jacob. He swept some dust off his shoulder and glanced at Jake.

"Welp, how do I look?" the younger werewolf asked nervously.

"Handsome, bro. Oh, no. Sorry. I was just looking at my reflection. You look horrible," Jacob answered, mockingly grinning.

"Har-har," Seth replied, rolling his eyes. "Seriously, man?"

"Not bad. I'm positive Madge will be totally impressed by the suit. Who knew Natives could pull off beige, huh?" Jacob queried rhetorically.

"Um, yeah. . ." Something in Seth's voice suggested amiss.

The twenty-four year old narrowed his eyes in a suspicious glower. "It was that freak's idea, wasn't it?" Seth nodded with a guilty grimace. "Oh, well. I'll give her credit where credit is due. Her judgment is right on the money."

"Wait a minute—you complimented Ren? The world must be coming to an end," Seth replied incredulously, simpering with a sly wink.

"Hey," Jacob exclaimed, punching his shorter friend on the shoulder, "don't sound so surprised. I'm awesome!"

One of the dressing room doors swung open, and Nessie emerged with her tongue sticking out at Jacob. "No, you're not. Dude, don't lie!"

Seth chuckled. "Is it National Break out into Song Day and nobody bothered to inform me? Ruh-hude!"

Renesmee smiled a dimpled smile; Jacob thought it was kind of cute. "You look great, Seth!"

"Thank you. Not too bad yourself there, Ren. Where's Madge?" It was an instinctual inquiry, of course—it was a side-effect of the imprint phenomenon.

"In the dressing room with Leah. Wait until you see the dress we picked out for her, big guy! Good luck keeping your heart rhythm steady," Nessie said, patting him on the shoulder.

Seth grinned. "Alice will be proud. I'm gonna go find another dressing room and change out of this monkey suit," he announced, scurrying off, and left Jacob and Renesmee alone in the store corridor.

His red wood orbs stared up and down at the girl-woman's body, wearing a metallic lavender V-cut dress with spaghetti straps. Ever time she emitted a breath, her porcelain breasts softly pushed against the silk fabric. Her reddish-brown locks curled at the tips, blanketing her shoulders finely. Damn, she was a sight for sore eyes, especially with that dress accenting Nessie's subtle hips. Yep. Nessie undoubtedly managed to achieve the balanced appearance between sexy and drop dead gorgeous. The other guys must have been thinking some of the same stuff, because a few stopped dead in their tracks to stare, not that Nessie seemed to notice all the leering.

"Hey," Nessie greeted shyly.

Jacob crossed his arms over his chest, trying desperately not to fantasize about Nessie naked. "That was gonna be my opening line. Um, I'll regret saying this later, but the bridesmaid gown looks good on you." Beautiful, actually.

Nessie hummed, nodding slowly as the raspberry corners of her mouth curved into a sultry smirk. "Back at you, boo. You look quite dapper yourself."

"Thank you," he retorted, feeling his cheeks form dimples, "but I still hate you."

"I still hate you, too."

Damn it. Jacob refused to look down. He couldn't. He was afraid that the traitorous chemicals of his bloodstream might be traveling south. . . Before he could think his next set of words through, Jacob already begun to spout, "I just wanna tear that dress off-"

Fluttering her thickly rimmed, black eyelashes in a seductive manner, interrupting him with a cheery giggle. "That's really inappropriate, Jacob. Flattering, but inappropriate."

"Then, I'll burn it, and burn you."

"Hmmm," Renesmee murmured, leaning back on the wall with a straight posture. "Is that why you can't stop picturing us rolling around in a mess of sheets without a stitch of clothing on either of us?"

Without realizing it, Jacob braced his hands on the wall to bring himself closer to Nessie, as his brown eyes smirked upon her arrogant structure. "I am not. . ."

"Keep telling yourself that, Jacob, but mark my words, you won't be able to keep up this charade up for much longer." Her pink tongue licked across her bottom lip, her minty breath brushing against Jacob's cleft. "You are going to fall in love with me."

Jacob shook his head. "Never."

"Nope. Sooner than you think." Renesmee grinned, her lips full and plump and shell-pink.

"No," he denied, telling himself more than her. In all honesty, Jacob was dying to kiss Nessie again, and it was entirely unfair how this alluring creature could tempt and taunt and manipulate his natural instincts to her pleasure. Jacob could give in right now, allowing his good senses drown into her intoxicating mouth, or he could stand his ground. "We hate each other, and that's the way it should stay."

The halfling shrugged. "Perhaps, but I find doing the unexpected keeps life intriguing. I love the taste of surprise."

With the sound of a thousand mustangs madly running, his heart thumped. Right then and there, Jacob knew that his unstoppable desire was more than just temporary insanity, but he couldn't rid of the awful recollection of his nightmare—of her's mother's piercing declaration, of Nessie motionless in his arms. "Oh, yeah?" His dark eyebrows arched, observing the faint pink blush staining her cheeks.

"Mhmm. However, you're absolutely right about one thing. We would never work out in a million years." Nessie emitted a long sigh, tilting her chin upwards and all Jacob could contemplate was getting his mouth on hers once again. "I bet that kiss didn't mean anything to you."

"I wanted to wash my mouth out with soap," Jacob retorted sarcastically, leaning in further whilst their chest mashed together.

Renesmee half-smiled as her chocolate eyes smoldered. "We're not even the same species. If there were anything between us, it would be totally and utterly forbidden." But then again, prohibition was always a fun aphrodisiac.

"Yeah, and your mom doesn't want us together either," the man-wolf added.

"She loathes the idea."

"We shouldn't. . ."

"I agree."

"I do, too."

For the second time that day, the werewolf and the half-breed met in a feverish kiss, their lips harmonically molding and moving and massaging. His hands cupped Nessie's rosy cheeks, feeling their kiss in a different way. Nobody could kiss like her, fore she could make Jacob soar without his feet ever leaving the ground. This girl was an foreign to Jacob, so unusual and taboo, yet being her prescence was like relaxing at home. Although, his brain could not yet got on board with the ridiculous notion, his heart was still fervently trying to make a blind man see the light shining from this singular woman.

Jacob didn't like her, of this fact he was certain. This feeling—it was crazy, no doubt, but it was something else—out of this world. He pulled away suddenly, just to memorize her in case this was all merely a figment of his imagination. The last thing he wanted to do was wake up to an existence without Renesmee. "Ness, I. . ."

"It's okay, Jacob," she whispered contently, putting a patient finger to his lips. "I know." Renesmee smiled warmly at him, her temptress demeanor disappearing and pushed him away from her, a hurt expression worn on her face for a brief millisecond. "Just do me a favor, please?"

"Sure, what is it?" he queried.

Nessie grabbed Jacob's hand, and dragged him to the nearest dressing room.

_When I wake up_

_The dream isn't done_

_I wanna see your face and know I made it home_

_If nothing is true_

_What more can I do?_

_I am still painting flowers for you_


	11. ET

**Disclaimer: Nothing belongs to me! Song by Katy Perry.**

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><p><em>Kiss me, kiss me<em>

_Infect me with your love_

_And fill me with your poison_

_Take me, take me_

_Wanna be your victim_

_Ready for abduction_

"What are we doing in here?" Jacob inquired quietly as Renesmee locked the door.

"I have no clue. I just wanted some privacy," she murmured, sitting him down on a small bench and straddled his lap, right over his increasing arousal.

"To do what?"

"Something reckless," Nessie answered, a nefarious smirk glinted in the brown of her eyes.

Their mouths collided fervently. Renesmee's hands entwined between Jacob's cropped, midnight locks as a barely audible snarl rumbled from his lower belly, somehow unable to get close enough to her despite their hot proximity to each other. Underneath his palms, he could feel Nessie's lily-white flesh beginning to inflame with the insatiable power of lust and he felt quite the same way, if not more so. Jacob's brain turned to gooey mush, uncaring if making out with a heathen bloodsucker would ruin his reputation as a brute force in the end. Nessie was worth it. His heart couldn't stop pulsating for her at the switch of a button, nor would a surgeon be capable of somehow healing it.

His tongue gently and patiently prodded the entrance of Renesmee's sweet mouth. He felt like a love-drunk and Nessie was the clever Eve that cunningly seduced him to sink his teeth into the juicy, forbidden fruit. She was his temptation, thrumming on his heartstrings like an out of tune harp, but it was funny how she made Jacob feel at the same time. Falling between the cracks of this ever-pounding sensation, Jacob's hands tried gripping for a lifeline that would never arrive to rescue him, but he wanted to—he wanted to engulf himself in this monster's universe.

"It gets hotter in here each time," Jacob roughly whispered against her lips.

The compliance of her tongue elicited a thundering growl from the shape-shifter, whilst his wide, warm hands roamed over Nessie's soft knees. The addicting flavor of the young Cullen overwhelmed Jacob's senses, causing the blood to travel South to his manhood. She was driving him crazy, exposing the truth of his affection for her so easily, as their tongues licked and danced like flames on firewood, soaking in her breath as she stole his.

It seemed so simple, in the intensity of the moment, to come clean and confess his whole heart through a delicious kiss—easier than conveying emotion through mere words. Actions speak louder, or so the saying goes. Nothing about Jacob's attraction to Nessie made sense, and maybe he should have countered this growing craving for her mouth, but resistance was futile.

Who was he trying to fool anyway?

"Jacob, we have to stop now," Renesmee stated, gently pulling away from him. Her lips had turned a deep cerise color.

"What, why?" he questioned, partly in a whining tone of voice.

Renesmee's nether lip caught between her teeth in a sly manner. "Because if we keep going on like this, I might do something I'm not ready for yet and there's still people around," she replied, lightly slapping Jake's hand away from her ass.

"Oh, you're a cocktease," Jacob retorted huskily with a charming wink. Nessie climbed off his lap, and the two stood up together.

"I'm sorry," Nessie smiled sheepishly, her cheeks burning bright.

"You should be. Just when I sort of start to tolerate you, you turn the tables around on me."

"I'm learning to be spontaneous," she said, her brown eyes telling Jacob of her secret fantasies.

"Trust me," the shape-shifter started, quickly adjusting his throbbing self in the khaki prison, "you are a freaking pro, Loch Ness."

"Good to know, but back to the favor you so gallantly granted me."

"That liplock wasn't it?" Jacob queried, grinning.

"Nope," the hybrid answered, turned around, and moved her bronze tendrils to the side of her shoulder, and exposed her alabaster back to the lustful wolf's devouring irises. "That was just for fun, baby. Can you unzip my dress for me, please?"

Reluctantly, and swallowing down a lump of oncoming, agonizing desire, Jacob slowly started to unzip the dress, pulling down the silver lever of the gown's many teeth. Jacob massaged his lips gingerly down from Renesmee's soft neck to the smooth surface of her shoulders, taking in her apple-blossom aroma, and mesmerized every centimeter of her with his attentive mouth. He felt a light shiver erupt up from her spine, earning a delighted moan from Nessie. The wolf spirit within thirsted at the idea of pressing the half-leech's body firmly against the wall and just screw Nessie's brains out. If she didn't stop him this time, it was possible he could reduce her to a puddle of sticky mush in a matter of minutes.

Her rapid heartbeat sounded through Jacob's ears, tranquilizing him to bow to her will instead of his own. Jacob hungered for Nessie, the beast roaring at him to claim her as his own.

Nessie abruptly turned around to face Jacob. "Thank you."

"Um," Jacob gulped, "no problem."

"Now get out. Scat, vamoose! I must get out of this dress!" Renesmee told him, trying to shoo him out of the changing room.

Jacob hung his head, downtrodden. "Can't I watch?"

"Nice try, Mister." The half-breed giggled, shaking her head to and fro, and gestured a demand. "Out."

* * *

><p>A few hours later that same day, Seth and Madge had wandered off somewhere in the mall, Nessie went to go visit a bookstore, while Leah and Jacob were left to watch over the shopping bags. It wasn't awkward at all, actually. So what if Jacob's new favorite hobby was making out with Leah's imprint in strange places?<p>

Leah nervously shifted her weight from one foot to the other. "Hey, Jake. I was wondering if we could cut the uncomfortable silence and chit-chat like old times?"

Jacob shrugged nonchalantly. "Why not? How's it kicking, Leah?"

"Not bad. My brother is getting married and I just bought a beautiful dress. Life is pretty awesome," Leah replied, her tone hesitant and weary. Jacob could sympathize.

"Leah, come on. You have something to say, so say it," Jacob said, already exhausted from beating around the bush.

"You can't have my Renesmee, Jake," Leah stated, stripping away her reserve for Jacob's feelings.

Jacob narrowed his eyes into a stern stare. "Nessie doesn't belong to you."

"You know what I mean," Leah scoffed, rolling her eyes. "Stop playing around with her. Don't break her heart just because Bella broke yours."

He couldn't really blame Leah for jumping to that conclusion, albeit the accusation lain against him was insultingly presumptuous, but it was still below the belt all the same. In the eight years he spent away from his home—his life—Jacob accepted that there were other fish in the sea. Even if the contrary were true, Jacob wasn't the type of person to get back at the former love of his life through her daughter.

"This has nothing to do will Bella," Jacob told her, struggling to keep his cool. "Give me more credit than that."

"Oh, then what is this, huh? I thought you didn't like Ren," Leah replied, starting to raise her typical attitude like old times.

"I don't." And that was a genuine statement. Jacob yearned to let his lips adventure all around Nessie's lovely skin, sample each part for his own greedy entertainment, and drink in every fiber of her being.

"Then leave her alone. The game you're playing is sick."

"Game?" the werewolf repeated incredulously. "I'm not some stupid teenager anymore, okay? Bella was never the right girl for me. She was always meant to end up with Pretty Boy Cullen and be a bloodsucking vampire. Bottom line, Nessie's something different, and I have to trust that."

"She is my imprint, not yours. Back off!" She demanded, clenching her fist full of bags at her side until her knuckles were colored chalk-white.

"No."

"What is with you?" Leah inquired, her face blazed irritation. "What do you have to gain from Ren anyway?"

"Nothing, Leah. Not a damn thing, but between you and me—I don't care anymore," the Quileute man confessed, shoving his share of the bags into Leah's arms. Pretending just wasn't worth it, especially when nobody was buying his act.

"But. . ." Leah sighed sharply, shaking her head in disbelief at their predicament. "You have to, Jacob. You two are like water and oil. It will never last. You'll back to Seattle in a couple of days, and leave me to pick up your mess."

"Hey!" Jacob exclaimed defensively, knitting his dark eyebrows together. "It's not like that! I lo-. . ." His words fell dead on his lips, and glanced at the ground.

Leah quirked both eyebrows disapprovingly, contemplating Jacob with a glower of revelation and anger. "You what, Jacob?"

With a burdened breath, the shape-shifter's oak eyes implored desperately Leah, wanting her to understand. "Don't force me to miss out on getting to know Nessie, because I can't," Jacob elucidated, pondering the half-human half-vampire woman in question. Perhaps if he had remained in La Push all those years ago, he probably would have adored Nessie like everybody else.

"Yes, you can. Try, Jacob."

"No, Leah."

"Fine," she sneered. "But I promise, if you break Ren's heart, I will personally hall ass to Seattle and knock your ugly block off," Leah threatened, her nostrils flaring widely and her breathing hitched.

"Do your worst. You don't scare me." For that matter, neither did Bella Cullen. The more he thought about it, the more he urgently sought to experience every single spark along his copper skin that tickled his body when Renesmee came close. That was the real problem that frightened him to death.

"I don't trust you with Ren," Leah replied calmly, eying him carefully and appeared absolutely terrified.

Jacob shrugged, pushing his hands into the depths of his pockets. "Well, that makes two of us, I guess," he said, his head spinning in fury. "I haven't known Nessie for less forty-eight hours, but I've known her forever." His expression contorted into thought—that familiar sensation exhilarated through his veins.

"That makes no sense," Leah replied with an obnoxious snort.

"And maybe it doesn't have to." After all, Jacob hadn't exactly been normal in nearly a decade. Damn it. He would have preferred to agree with Leah and go back to hating Nessie's guts; but, hour by hour, that girl's milk chocolate orbs kept on enticing him.

"She is Bella and Edward's daughter. You have no choice—just forget about her," she half-ordered, half-suggested, solemn like a hurricane.

Jacob blinked.

* * *

><p><em>There sat a middle-aged woman—her scalp decorated in reddish-brown waves of hair, her irises twinkled like fine emeralds, and her complexion beautifully peach. Not so unlike his waitress friend, Lizzie, or Renesmee. Or even Edward. She seemed saddened, passing a quill pen and contract over to an optionless widower.<em>

"_Why are you helping us?" Bella cynically queried._

"_Because I, too, was powerless when watching my loved ones wilt away into the dust. Amongst them was my dear husband, whom shares a first name with your own, young Bella." Her green eyes flooded with tears, choking them back, and stared at Jacob. "I have been granted a gift to help and heal. This is not a trickery. I can bring back your wife, Jacob Black, in exchange for your memories of her, but I can only do this once. You know better than I that destiny can't be battled so easily."_

_Jacob's heart wrenched, a hand squeezed at his stomach, but all was a necessity. He would have happily traded his life for Nessie's, but this mysterious woman only required another lifetime. His eyes drifted to the papyrus sheet, unafraid as he reached to sign._

"_All I have to do is sign my name?"_

_The woman nodded. "On the dotted line."_

"_What's the catch?" Leah questioned, ever-skeptical._

* * *

><p>Suddenly, with another blink back into reality, Jacob's frustration boiled over at the sight of Nessie walking over to the quarreling friends. "You know what, Leah? Screw you!" Jake bellowed with ferocious growl.<p>

"Woah, what did I miss?" Nessie inquired, glancing between the two trembling werewolves. She rested a gentle hand over Jacob's accelerated heartbeat—the movement almost instinctive. Jacob wrapped his fingers loosely around the half-vampire's wrist, dragging her away with him. "Wh-what are you doing, Jacob?" She jerked his wrist back.

"Do you wanna blow off the rest of the day or what?" Jacob asked impatiently, glaring at Leah still. Renesmee's eyes widened at the request, and looked back at Leah pleadingly, who was too wrapped up in her own anger. "Are you coming or what, Cullen?"

Slumping her shoulders in confusion and guilt, Nessie twisted her fingers through the gaps of Jacob's.

_You're so supersonic_

_Wanna feel your powers_

_Stun me with your lasers_

_Your kiss is cosmic_

_Every move is magic_

_You're from a whole other world_

_A different dimension_

_You open my eyes_

_And I'm ready to go _

_Lead me into the light_


	12. Stars

**Disclaimer: Nothing belongs to me! This song is by Skye.**

* * *

><p><em>It's funny when you find<em>

_What you want was by your side the whole time_

_I couldn't quite believe it_

_Suddenly, I'm seeing_

_You saw me_

A beautiful exhaled emitted into the late noon air from the half-human half-vampire's mouth, leaving behind deep footprints in the salty sand along the First Beach shoreline, as Jacob looked on ahead expression plastered on the contours of his face. Each of his footfalls were frustrated stomps in the sand, grunting something unintelligible every so often; Nessie would have happily giggled at his caveman behavior if that weren't inappropriate for the situation. Renesmee carefully grasped Jacob's hot wrist to get his attention.

"Are you going to tell me what that debacle involved or would you rather I guess?"

The shape-shifter yanked away from Nessie with restlessness, feeling the temperature rise to his cheeks—the exact opposite of how Jacob wanted to treat the girl-woman that was conniving to steal his heart from his self. He would not let the happen; he would not surrender, though it becoming quickly too late to do anything about it, but what else could Jacob do stop to keep this atrocious torment from devouring him whole?

And he knew that look—the one he could feel scratch the surface of his soul—it was the same one Nessie had given her prey.

"I just hate it when people try to tell me what to do."

With a nod, the young Cullen replied, "Doesn't everybody? I suppose I had the same discussion with my parents that you had with Leah. My mom will probably flip her lid when she finds out I'm not with Leah."

Jacob rolled his eyes, his shoulders slouched in tedium. "You know we're gonna get into a lot of trouble just for being alone together, right?"

"Yes, I do realize that. It's unorthodox, but I can't stop it, Jake," she murmured, fiddling with the golden chain dangling around her neck. Stepping closer, Nessie's hand reached out for Jacob's, but he pulled back.

"This is so confusing. None of this can happen. You—I hate you. . . Leah is right. God, I'm so fucking stupid!" He could have pulled his hair out from its roots. His bass voice echoed into the autumn breeze, the soles of his feet magically cemented to the ground. When all Jacob wanted to do was escape Nessie's mesmerizing, sweet presence, his heart kept screaming at his brain the contrary.

"What?" Renesmee inquired with a breathy sigh, incredulous and slightly appalled. "Fine, you big blockhead! Be an idiot!"

"You wouldn't understand, Nessie."

Nessie stamped an insulted foot, quirking a unenlightened brow. "Try me."

"We're too different—too complicated," he retorted, feigning disinterest. Jacob couldn't simply tell her the truth of a silly nightmare; therefore, he preferred to proclaim a tale. "Too difficult. I'm too tired to bother with all of this, Nessie."

Gently laying a hand on Jacob's round, copper cheekbones, caressing at the skin, Renesmee teased Jacob by barely ghosting her lips on the left corner of his mouth. He should not have yearned to mesh their bodies together as one then, but he did—so, so much. He should have not wanted to steal her addicting kisses, flirting with the sweet danger of Nessie's lips, but damn it. Something in the complex existence of this peculiar, blossoming romance was all fraudulent.

Did she truly know the bittersweet torture she bestowed upon the aching chambers of his slowly thawing heart? Could she? Jacob could have dropped to his knees right then and begged her to never leave his side, but there was no dignity in such an act.

"Our worlds are different, Jacob, but _we_ are not. Deep down where it counts, we are similar in many ways," Renesmee stated, her words expressed with the utmost certainty.

"How could you possibly know that?"

Jacob's massive hands wrapped firmly around Nessie's slender elbows, pushing Nessie safely away from where he stood—though, his heart desired foolishly for a kind sentiment from her musical voice—yet his muscles shifted and his bones writhed steadily when he pictured his Nessie's body breathless in his arms; and he would not risk the ounce of goodness left in his heart for a fling that was sure to burn out. This nightmare, of her scorching blood drenching his palms as he held her body tightly close, was his burden alone to bear. His stomach churned maniacally at the remembrance of the gray forest, the lack of oxygen, Bella's screams resounding sharply through his deaf eardrums. . .

It was his despair, not Renesmee's. But. . . It was all a dream, a mere nightmare.

Wasn't it?

Jacob feared this creature, feared her with every fiber of his being, but struggled to keep his heart at bay. It was difficult, and he realized that Nessie wouldn't easily buy his act. Unlike her mother, she wasn't simply manipulated by a few weaponed opinions. For his own protection, Jacob forced himself to keep attempting the possible, and let her go when she was three feet away.

Sullen in her imploring vision, Nessie shook her head. "We both need to breathe, have beating hearts and warm hands. We both have brown eyes, and share a quality of stubbornness—that much is obvious, isn't it? Undoubtedly, the two of us are out of the ordinary. Jacob, that day we met. . . Didn't you feel it?"

It? That sensation of that, by a cruel twist of fate, they were meant to encounter on a random day out of the week? Yes, yes he did.

The part-human part-wolf nodded indecisively. "Yeah, I did—I do. I just don't want to feel it, not for someone like you anyway. Even if it's only by a half, you're still a bloodsucker and I was born to protect humans from your kind."

Nessie's nose scrunched, and the phantom of a smile sewed itself on Jacob's mouth. "In case you failed to notice, my family and I aren't your typical vampires. But your head is so far lodged up your tight ass, you're too freaking blind to see that!"

Snorting and growling, the werewolf huffed impatiently through his flared nostrils. After a short sigh, Jacob's defense softened. "Whatever. That's the way things are with me, and that's how they'll always be. If you can't tolerate that, I suggest you hit the road. You against me—it's a war, Nessie."

The eight year-old scoffed, laughing indulgently and darkly. "Pfft, you don't scare me, Jacob Black. But if that's the way you want it to be, Jacob, then okay. All these years, I've heard everybody go on about how brave and selfless you are, but that was all a scam—an act, really. Good job, Jacob, because you really do have your friends and family fooled into believing you're some courageous hero. You deserve an Oscar award. Even my dad is grateful to you. None of them realize that you are so damn weak!"

"Well, I guess you have me all figured out, don't you Nancy Drew?" he replied sarcastically, criss-crossing his arms over his chest. Honestly, it was pathetic how she could read him like an open book, when, in turn, Renesmee Carlie Cullen was such a riveting mystery to Jacob—someone he secretly wanted to get to know well.

"Yes, I believe I do. You haven't proven otherwise to me quite yet. What I don't get, Jacob, is that we could be on the verge of something magnificent together—an adventure that we will never forget—but you're letting fear and old prejudices dictate your life—what I might mean to you!" Nessie exclaimed, her porcelain complexion splattered with hurt and ire.

"Aren't you afraid, too?" Jacob inquired curiously.

"No," Renesmee answered genuinely, her brown eyes gentle and bright. "I have wanted this feeling for as long as I can remember. For so many nights, I crossed my fingers and wished with all my might that I would someday be crazy out of my mind in this way. Eight birthdays have passed me by, and my heart really wishes for is love. And you know what, Jake? _I found you_. The only thing that scares me is that you can't handle the chaos that comes along with it. I'm not worth it."

Feeling suddenly overwhelmed with guilt, Jacob frowned. "C'mon, Nessie, don't be like that. That's not it." Any guy would be straightforwardly brainless to not fall in love with Nessie, but screw them. She deserved better. "I. . . I'm in over my head for you, a-and," he stammered shyly, the words swollen on his tongue, "I've never been the best at this romance business stuff. The last time I felt anything like this, my heart got clobbered."

"Jacob," the half-breed whispered timidly, "I am not Bella."

"I know that. Cripes, believe me, I am completely aware," Jacob retorted. He extended a hand for Nessie, and he began stroking her nimble digits affectionately. "With Bella, it never once felt real. I guess I always knew she was gonna choose Edward. But this—with us, I mean—from the start, it feels different. It feels tangible and real, and it can't. I know nothing about you, Nessie."

Uh-oh, he was doing it again, opening up.

Nessie smiled, warming up Jacob's inside and making him feel fuzzy. "Alrighty, then. My favorite color is yellow. I love the smell of coffee in the morning, but I hate the taste. I like playing in the rain and splashing in the puddles. My favorite song is 'Here Without You' by Three Doors Down and-"

"Really, no kidding? It's mine, too!" Jacob exclaimed in slight skepticism. The majority of his friends didn't even comprehend the melancholy of that song.

"Mmkay, your turn now," she replied with an endearing, pink blush.

Jacob shrugged. "Well, there's not much to know. My favorite food is spaghetti and I hate watching movies by myself. I love building all sorts of vehicles from scratch, and swimming in the ocean during a thunderstorm is pretty fun. And ever since my mom died, I hate the idea of losing people I care about," the shape-shifter elaborated, the last sentence uttered in a mumble.

"I know," Jacob replied, and another thought sprang to forefront of his mind. "But there is one more thing I want to know about you, Nessie."

"Name it," Nessie giggled softly, tilting her head in a cute manner that nearly distracted Jacob from his question.

"Why are those cliffs so important to you?"

* * *

><p>Soon, the indigo night discovered the youthful werewolf and vampire-human hybrid lying down exhaustively on the cliffs of La Push, where the full moon was set high up in the twinkling sky, its beams practically spotlighting Jacob and Renesmee. The owls hooted, the trees rustled, the restless winds whistled through the red leaves, and the two natural enemies conversed.<p>

"Do you see those constellations right there?" Renesmee queried, pointing the frowning stars.

"The ones reaching for each other? Uh-huh, yeah. Why are they like that?" Jacob asked in perplexity.

"Well, Jacob, a very long time ago, they were lovers," Nessie started, inhaling and exhaling sharply, almost like she could barely speak. "Artemis and Myriah grew up in families that loathed each other, but on one spring afternoon, their paths crossed and it was love at first sight. They frequently met in secret—talking endlessly for hours, teaching each other silly songs, or just holding one another until the world would interrupt them. Then, Myriah's blowhard father discovered their deception. He forbade Artemis from ever looking upon his daughter again, otherwise they would all regret it in the end."

"So why didn't they just run away?" Jacob questioned curiously, glancing at the beautiful half-vampire half-human woman.

"They were going to. Artemis and Myriah had a anticipation plan—they would start a life together in Seattle, where they could raise their children. Artemis sent a letter to Myriah, explaining that they would meet at this very cliff at the break of dawn, but. . . Once again, Myriah's meddlesome father found out. He entrapped himself in such a rage, to the point of madness, and the punishment for her dishonesty to her family was death."

Jacob's mouth fell agape, his expression furrowing into shock and disgust. "He killed his own daughter?"

Tears moistened Renesmee's milk chocolate irises, the moonlight glistening deeply, as Jacob stared upon her with anticipation. It injured his desolate spirit to gaze at Nessie in a fragile-glass state, with small, translucent water-droplets raining from her raven eyelashes, and raining down her lily-white cheeks. Instinctively, the werewolf stretched a copper finger to cleanse away his Nessie's sorrow, but still, Jacob experienced a morose dagger stab at his chest for thinking how she appeared immensely lovely, even with tears springing at her eyes. She half-smiled, grateful for Jacob's compassionate gesture.

No longer were Jacob's feeling a meaningless lust, or a passing infatuation.

"Murder would be a more appropriate way of putting it Jacob, but essentially yes. He flung her body into the ocean," Nessie answered, the reflection of the creamy stars twinkling in her saddened orbs.

"What happened to Artemis?" Jake queried, now concerned for a fictional character's well-being.

Nessie grimaced. "When he came searching for Myriah and couldn't find her, Artemis looked down—to see her broken body floating over the rocks. The sight was too much for him. Artemis picked up a sharp rock from the dusty ground, then cut out his heart. True love is a once in a lifetime opportunity, and now that he had known it, how could he breathe. Nothing would be more painful than a life without Myriah. Then again, a life without true love isn't a life at all.

"Raven, a mystical spirit, saw them and admired their love from afar. And so, he cast their souls into the blanket of the stars. However, by a treacherous twist of fate, Artemis and Myriah were thrown mere feet apart. That's how they'll spend eternity. Both know they are destined to never touch again, but they refuse to ever stop trying," Renesmee finished, shaking her head to and fro.

"Geeze, that's depressing," Jacob said.

"Uh-huh," Nessie agreed.

"Artemis and Myriah sure do leave Romeo and Juliet in the dust," the shape-shifter commented mournfully.

"Yeah, I definitely would never desire to walk a mile in their shoes," Nessie replied.

Her eyelids fluttered sealed, snuggling up closely to Jacob's toasty warm chest, who didn't especially mind granting Nessie this proximity,and wrapped his arms around her. Nessie's heartbeat slowed to a steady rhythm, the subtle decrescendo lulling Jacob to sleep.

Jacob could easily guess that tale was a challenging thing to tell; and truthfully, he felt extraordinary to know this information about the young hybrid. She trusted _him_, she revealed her secret self to _him_, she shared her spot on the cliff with _him_—not Leah, her so-called soul mate.

"Nessie?" Jacob whispered, drinking in the intoxicating fragrance of her mahogany-red ringlets of disorderly hair. The innocent nearness of their body was making the Native American man delirious by the millisecond.

"Hmmm. . . ?" Renesmee mumbled tiredly. "What is it, Jacob?"

Jacob thought it was a good a time as ever to tell Nessie the truth, but when he readied himself to spout the words, she was fast asleep betwixt his chest and his welcoming arms. And that was okay with him; he wasn't ready to confess his heart to Nessie yet, but now, on this night, he knew the truth for himself.

"Nayeli, Nessie."

_I saw stars_

_I saw sky_

_I saw everything inside_

_And you saw me_

_Light from dark shine on night_

_Solar systems all so bright_

_And you saw me_


	13. Dante's Prayer

**Disclaimer: You know the drill. Song belongs to Loreena McKennitt. As a minor holiday present, I've included a small lemon in this chapter for ya'll! Happy holidays!**

_I did not believe because I could not see_

_Though you came to me in the night_

_When the dawn seemed forever lost_

_You showed me your love in the light of the stars_

"_Don't worry, Jacob, you never have to worry. I love you, too," the halfling murmured affectionately, her delicious breath tickling her husband's cleft. "I swear my love for you will never weather away or perish. It'll only grow."_

_The werewolf could feel his temperature rise up and boil his cheek; she could always say the things Jacob always thought about her, but would probably word the sentiments with less articulation. Yeah, his woman was sappy, but it worked well for someone of her upbringing._

_Jacob deflated on the dust-covered cliff ground; the only item between his exposed, russet flesh and the bumpy floor was his wife's checker-patterned afghan. His warm hands explored all over Renesmee's slender, alabaster skin as the half-breed's nails lightly scratched against Jacob's ebony pectorals. A stupor of pleasure electrocuted his sensitive spine, as his copper flesh puckered underneath Nessie's taunting fingertips. Her eternal swirls of Hershey's chocolate irises stared into his own—bewitching Jacob until goosebumps formulated throughout his entire body. _

"_You little devil," Jacob groaned, the aroused spell hypnotizing both individual brains into impatience._

"_You have no idea how much I try," Nessie said, smirking mischievously and two cute dimples decorated her magenta cheeks. _

_Jacob frowned at her. "Why?"_

"_Because I always want you to think I'm sexy," she replied nervously, properly straddling her soul mate's perfervid hips. "I'm not really one of those temptress type of women, you know."_

"_I know. I don't want you to be, Nessie," Jacob stated, sweeping back Nessie's auburn coils off her smooth shoulders. "I love you—all of you—nobody else."_

_Nessie whimpered restlessly, pushing down her liquid fire upon Jacob's pulsing length, and braced her on the slopes of the shape-shifter's muscular shoulders. "Oh-oooh!"_

"_Are you all right?" Jacob inquired in anxiety. Granted, they had made love a multitudinous number of times already, but never like this—out in the open and with Renesmee sitting in his lap. _

"_Oh, yes," Nessie answered, her voice nearly infrasonic from a lack of breath, and nodded. "Come here."_

_Jacob sat up on Renesmee's command, holding her buttocks wonderfully close to his throbbing erection. Her arms wrapped around him a desperate embrace, as Nessie's cranberry lips crashed in a ferocious passion against Jacob's, eliciting him to ground out a grunt. His member could have swam in his wife's tight, weeping center, where their sexes and souls connected as a singular body. _

"_Nessie!" he groaned roughly, his heart erratically pounding until it was sure to spontaneously combust. One hand went astray, reaching down between Nessie's lower lips to stroke at her beating, pink clit. _

"_J-J-Jacob!" the half-human half-vampire screamed out, forcing her pelvis to rock faster against him as her juices flowed, cascading around her husband. "Ooh, Jacob! Jacob!" she yelped. Her breath hitched sharply in the back of her throat. A purr emanated from Renesmee's chest, whilst her nether region alternated between rotating and bouncing on Jacob's lap, as he obligingly thrust needfully into her. "Jacob!"_

"_Nessie, f-fuck!" His voice spoke through a hoarse grunt as his fingers flicked and rubbed her swollen lever of intense delight, and Nessie quirked her eyebrows into a look of absolute, lustful frustration. "Nessie!"_

"_Mmm," Nessie squeaked, enveloped in a cloud of roaring pleasure while Jacob's rock-hard staff stabbed at her plump G-spot. "Oh, Jacob! Right there, just like that!"_

_With that, her binding walls squeezed warmly around Jacob, feeling herself melt away into a sweet, sweet oblivion. In turn, Jacob's own orgasm heightened immeasurable when Renesmee, for the moment, lost control of her ability—showing him her point of view of their event. A growl rippled through his abdomen and the two lovebirds were spent upon reaching their climax. Renesmee held Jacob close to her supple breasts, falling gracefully on top of him as he laid back on the ground._

"_Damn. . ." Jacob mumbled, panting._

"_Yeah," Nessie agreed with a giggle._

_The couple shared a laugh and a high-five, and then a goofy grin spread across Jacob's entire face—lighting up like a July evening. He flipped their bodies over, brushing his mouth over the base of her neck. "I am so not done with you yet, Nessie."_

"_Oh, thank goodness!" Nessie responded, laughing in exhilaration, and the two began another intimate pursuit._

_And to think, they had all eternity to simply love each other._

. . .

_In his bronze fingers, Jacob twiddled with a hand-made bracelet, studying the yellow, red, brown, and orange leather strands that were woven into the trinket's design. It was a symbol—of his dedicated promise to always protect her, a solemn vow that he would forever guard her life come hell or highwater. No matter what the obstacles, Jacob would tear down the realms of Heaven and earth to ensure her safety, his Nessie._

_Although, Jacob of course meant every solitary syllable of his oath with every fiber of his being, the gesture was deemed nothing but a lie. She had been the one—to protect him from a sure danger, to save Jacob from himself over and over again, and what did he give in her return? Nothing. He allowed her to die so easily._

_Footsteps sounded trough the small graveyard as the cold rain started to cry, drip-dropping from the silver sky. It was a dreary morning, one that would have consisted of an action film, hot chocolate, and popcorn if she were still breathing, but alas, her body lied lifeless and steady six feet underground. _

_Clearing his throat, Edward chose to speak then; thus, assassinating the pregnant silence. "You didn't kill her, Jacob. It was Faethra."_

"_That's not true, Edward," Jacob countered through chapped lips and gritted teeth; he couldn't rip his gaze away from the name inscribed on the headstone. "If I had never loved Renesmee, she would still be alive."_

"_Jacob, don't do that to yourself. Nessie didn't want misery for you. She died saving you—don't let her death be in vain," Edward begged, gripping his son in-law's shoulder, employing what ounce of strength left in his body. "It's hard for everyone, Jacob, not just you. Renesmee was my daughter, and I-I-I. . . It was never an option to lose her, but I couldn't control the path she decided to follow." The vampire endeavored to choke back the onslaught of ruefulness in his normally neutral tone. "She chose you, Jacob. She chose you until the very end."_

"_Yeah, and I got her killed, Edward!" Jacob sneered, a dagger of pain jolting from his stomach and wounded his reluctantly beating heart. It wasn't the overbearing heat that would cause him to phase into a giant wolf, but a simple icy poison that coursed through his bloodstream. A river of tears once again began to flow down his paled cheeks, onto the yellow grass. "Does it even matter anymore? She. . . She was my hero. Always kind, always strong, always willing to have faith, and always called me on my crap or indulged me when I needed her to. All I had to do was be quick enough, but no. I pay Nessie back by being too slow."_

_He placed the tiny bracelet atop the shallow grave. A fist raised high into the air, and Jacob pounded it into the cold stone, where the imprint would stay for eternity._

* * *

><p>His eyelids snapped wide open, his hands trying to find a slim figure and felt only a dirty ground. "Nessie?" Jacob arose immediately, scanning the area for the half-breed.<p>

"It's okay. I'm over here," she answered quietly, sitting on the very edge of the cliff. "You woke up in time."

Jacob sat next to Nessie, his legs swinging back and forth over the crashing ocean below, gazing at the golden sphere lifting gradually. It painted the sky tangerine, the sunrays shining over the water as the seagulls squawked. The sight was breathtaking—beautiful—but not miraculous as the light in Nessie's dazzling smile. He imagined that if he was ever to become a blind man, he would ask God to let him see her smile one last time.

"Man, it's been years since I've seen a sunrise," the shape-shifter confessed.

"Really? It's my first. However, I've seen more than my fair share of sunsets," Renesmee replied shyly, smiling oh-so tiredly and yawned. She rested her head on the Native American man's shoulder, using him as a pillow, and Jacob made no attempt to stop her.

"Sunsets are overrated, anyway. New beginnings are happier to watch, less depressing than an ending," Jacob commented, his words lighthearted and grinned joviality at the girl next to him.

"Hmmm. . . I figured you would prefer the night—when women are most likely to strip from their butt-floss panties and bow down to your sexual whims." Nessie giggled, gently poking at his abdominals with an index finger.

A deep chuckle released from Jacob's throat, and winked suggestively. "I don't need the nighttime for that, Nessie."

"Oh, is that so? Actually, it's astonishing you aren't in a relationship, Jake. Any reasons?" Nessie inquired interrogatively, giving him an attentive stare and slightly scooted away.

"If I broke out into a chorus of 'Just Haven't Found What I'm Looking For Yet,' would that suffice as an explanation?" Jacob queried sheepishly.

"No, but nice try," Nessie retorted, her nose momentarily crinkling in laughter—freaking adorable. Yeah. Unfortunately, last night wasn't just a silly fluke—he was definitely falling even more in love with this girl.

"I guess. . . For along time, I just wanted to imprint for the sake of getting over Bella—get that stupid look and that even stupider glow," Jacob elucidated, sighing heavily. "Then, that never happened. So, I tried falling in love the human way."

"And?" she encouraged, softly smiling.

Jacob rolled his eyes at himself, recalling his futile attempts at a secure, committed romance. "Bella is the closest thing I ever had at having a soul mate. Well, maybe. I don't know. I'm a total sap for it, and I'll deny that I said this, but I wanna imprint—not to get over Bella, but just for me. I wanna love someone and have it work out for once."

"You have that 'I'm sick of sunsets' syndrome." The hybrid giggled, grazing her pearly white teeth over her nether lip.

"Yep. How about you?"

"There was Nahuel."

"What's a Nahuel?"

"Nahuel is another half-human half-vampire hybrid, like me!" Renesmee exclaimed happily, followed by a hollow exhale. "We kind of had a fling to springs ago."

Jacob's stomach suddenly churned and thrashed, feeling queasy at the unwelcome fantasy creeping into his mind—a guy with a blank face snaking his arm around Nessie's shoulders during a horror film, them holding hands while strolling down the beach, and making out on a couch. He felt his insides stretch too tight, as though he was about to puke acid. After all, how could Jacob compete with someone like Nessie, a person who could truly comprehend the complexity of hybrid DNA?

"You two must have made a cute couple," Jacob commented sarcastically, stifling a possessive, rumbling snarl.

Jealousy was a bitch.

Renesmee shrugged. "I don't know. My parents thought Nahuel and I made a handsome match," she said, rolling her eyes in agitation. "Although, I did not—_do not_. Don't get me wrong. Nahuel is fun to hang out with on a boring night. We'd talk for hours, dance to smooth Jazz music, watch classic movies with orange chocolate."

"Yeah, thanks. I get the picture," Jacob grumbled, his tone seething with raw bitterness. "So, why didn't it work out?"

Moving a hand slowly to rest over the werewolf's, Nessie helped him to relax. It was amazing—with a mere touch, she had the power to make a restless, reckless man flood with relief—and Jacob was gratified. Their foreheads rested upon each others in a lazy affection when Nessie kissed his dimpling cheek.

"Do you feel that electricity?" those shell-pink lips whispered in question.

Jacob's heartbeat sped up, drumming all too frantically. "Y-Y-Yeah," he stammered nervously, actually blushing.

"There was never any of that with Nahuel. Heck! I even kissed him, because I was hoping to find a spark of the love I wished for my entire life." Nessie's mouth pursed, and shook her head. "But nothing. No magic, no chemistry, no love."

"That sucks kiddo. Looks like we both have trouble in that department."

"I did," the half-breed nodded. "And then you came along."

"Sounds more like a case of bad luck to me, Nessie. I know you could do better," Jake retorted, grinning brighter than the yellow sun.

"No," she replied. "I highly doubt I will ever feel better than I do when I'm with you." Nessie's big, brown eyes silently pleaded for him to understand the magnitude of her heart, and of course he did.

"Love-hate romances rarely ever last," the Quileute wolf stated.

"True, but I'm not talking about your relationship with your hand. I'm talking about. . ." Nessie trailed, looking away like a flustered schoolgirl.

He had to laugh at that. The half-leech half-human possessed a witty tongue and hadn't known to expect that joke at his expense. Respect. "Look, Nessie, I wanna be with you, too, but if we were meant to be, I would imprinted on you. Besides that, I'm just a robot with assimilated emotions and calculated responses."

"False!" Nessie accused, furrowing her brows. "Jacob, you've shown me your anger, your doubt, your laughter, and yeah, you could imprint today, tomorrow, or even a hundred years from now, but I always thought that—well, you know—could never be a mistake. The way I see it, you and I, we're a coin toss."

Jacob carefully observed the way her raven eyelashes brushed the very top part of either cheek each time she blinked; and it was wonderful to see those identical, liquid, milk chocolate orbs open and reopen. A miracle. An ordinary miracle. They both arose from the dirty ground, smiling at one another.

"Heads or tails?" Jacob questioned.

"Your call."

Boldly, Jacob leaned forward to the young eighteen year-old looking woman, molding his mouth to hers—eager and fervent and on fire. Getting deliriously drunk on this girl was as easy as breathing, in a very strange way, different than whatever that fling was with Bella. Whenever he was around Nessie, something happened. An alien sensation invaded the soles of his feet, like a gravitational pull towards the center of the universe. His brain begged Jacob to continue fighting off this fatal love before one of them got hurt in the process, but his heart had finally battled it into submission, so tired of being neglected.

With a sly smirk, Renesmee pulled her tee shirt over her head and tossed it to the ground. Jacob's aroused mahogany irises roamed all over the shapely surface of her porcelain figure, as if she were a full-course buffet. Nowhere was there a flaw to be discovered. And her breasts, shielded in a lavender velvet bra, appeared delectably creamy.

"What are you doing?" Jacob asked, hot and bothered. Was his mouth watering now?

"Going for a swim," she answered cheekily. "Feel free to join me."

Without realizing it, his tongue had wet his whistle. As she dove off the precipice and into the ocean, Jacob called down to her, "Nessie Cullen, you're insane!"

"I know!"

_Cast your eyes on the ocean_

_Cast your soul to the sea_

_When the dark night seems endless_

_Please remember me_


	14. Change My Needs

**Disclaimer: Nothing belongs to me. This song is one of my favorites, and it's by Scars on 45.**

_I never meant to say you were the thorn in either side_

_It was a side-effect from the scars of the fourty-fives_

_And as the vital mistakes, it reminds me of what we have_

_Despite the things you do, you know I'm a fool for you_

_They say a legal kiss is not as good as a stolen one_

_We put our lives on show and yet we sing to a different song_

_And from the bassinet to the graveside we never walk_

_Of everything I've lost, I miss my mind the most_

What a perfect day.

Renesmee came twirling through the front door, singing and humming a sweet melody that was forever playing in the back of her mind; the poor girl was lost in a sea of elation—the tides could not be simply fended, nor did she care to attempt to do so. In fact, all she wanted to do was drown happily in the pull of the misty, salty ocean waves. God, Nessie prayed Jacob's arms would simply enveloped her being into a marvelous oblivion and never let her come back for a singular intake of oxygen ever again.

Currently, Nessie's life was a tightrope, but her heart was oblivious to the impending danger ahead, for she was walking on thin air, all but soaring high—free as a bird. Cloud Nine was much closer to Earth than she was, and Jacob was all to blame. Not that she found reason to complain. Truly, whatever force it was that connected their hearts to each other was more than welcome. She would willing share in the feeling of serenity with Jacob, if eternity bid her the opportunity.

A glowing smile danced across the strawberry contours of those lips, her heart thrumming like an African nato drum as she thought back to how Jacob hugged her legs tightly, yet carefully, around his toned waist when they were swimming together in the Pacific Ocean, linking their mouths together in a ravenous fever, their tongues mingling and massaging one another until they both needed oxygen in their lungs again.

Having his warm hands venture all of her exposed alabaster skin was pure bliss, as though she was born for this brand jubilation. The hot sensation of his touch lingered all over Nessie, tingling in places that have been so long dormant and untouched while she could still smell him, his scent laced in musky forest air, the cool night sky, and just a pinch of cinnamon. Nessie thirsted for a mere sample, to momentarily become undone in Jacob's voluptuous, delectable taste and satisfy her vampire half.

It was magnetizing, whatever it was that pulled the young Renesmee Cullen toward Jacob Black, and she fell victim to the infectious magic that consumed every single fiber of her being when his fiery fingertips waltzed across the surface of her skin. Could anything compare to the ecstasy of drawing him close to her?

Oh, how Nessie felt like a mere dream without Jacob's presence, and he was her one and only reality.

Edward and Bella ran into the living room, their faces contorted into livid and agitated expressions. The aura of the space grew intensely uncomfortable, nearly breaking the spell of of enrapturing heaven. Leave it to Mister and Misses Bummer to ruin Nessie's afternoon.

"Renesmee Carlie Cullen," Bella scolded, her fists planted firmly on her skinny hips with lowered eyebrows, "where in the hell have you been?"

"Oh, puh-leeze!" the half-breed spat, annoyance dripping from her tone like slick venom. "Not now, Mother. I'm in a wonderful mood and the last thing I need is you two to murder the high."

"No. You speak to us, young lady. You were out all day and all night, and you never bother to pick up a phone!" Edward bellowed, a raged concern evidently painted throughout his features, while his golden-brown irises changed to pitch-black.

"You had us worried sick," Bella added.

"Take a chillaxtive, guys. Jacob and I escaped the rest of the world for awhile," Renesmee replied, unshrinking under her mother's dagger-shooting scrutiny. "It was fun to pretend to have no demanding, overprotective parents or responsibilities. That's not a crime!" she reasoned.

"You were out with a boy!" Edward queried incredulously angry. "Renesmee, where have your good senses gone? We are very disappointed in you!"

Nessie shrugged, still relaxed. "Be disappointed. I don't care."

"I can't believe how you are behaving. You sneak out, doing only God knows what with a grown man, and you don't even call to tell that you're okay! Do our rules mean so little to you or is this that mutt's influence, Renesmee? You are _forbidden_," Bella punctuated the beginning of her brand-new regulation by stomping her foot, "from seeing Jacob Black!"

"Mom, you cannot do that to me!" Nessie complained. "Please. . ."

"No. You want to act like a spoiled brat, then you will be treated as such," Edward agreed, knitting his thick, black eyebrows together in irritation. "Renesmee, you are not allowed to speak or see Jacob Black ever again! Do we have an accord?"

"Ooh, I'm so scared," Renesmee retorted sardonically, rolling her eyes.

Trying to shove pass her bothersome parents, her vampire mighty, cold fingers captured Renesmee's thin wrist easily and rose the other hand flying into the air. Before the vampire-human hybrid's instincts could aid her to flinch away from the contact, there was a sudden _SMACK!_ stinging sensation pulsing on Nessie's right cheek.

The shock of the drastic action gnawed at her the most, not the pain. Nessie had never been slapped, but there she stood with her own hand, caressing the pink splotch away. Her shoulders felt like the mass of the universe was attempting climb onto them, and she battled back the oncoming tears. She had never been so damn humiliated in all of her eight years.

"Don't you dare speak to your father in that tone of voice!" Bella chided, savage and demanding, which only served to strengthen Nessie's determination for Jacob.

Renesmee's milk chocolate eyes blinked, glowering darkly back at the female vampire. She used a shield of biting fury to conceal the fear ebbing away inside her stomach, where butterflies transformed into black moths of despair. Nessie yanked her arm away from Bella, breathing in and out.

"How should I speak to you then, Mother, to either of you?" The youngest Cullen laughed humorlessly. "Neither of you seem to want understand! All my life, I have been the half-dead being, breathing and walking around like everybody else, but nobody realized that there was something missing. But I feel whole when I'm with Jacob. Don't you get it? I. . . I love him."

"You are not!" Bella countered.

"No, you won't spoil this for me!" Nessie shouted. "You do not have the authority to tell me who I can and cannot love! None of you have that power over me."

Bella softened after a low exhale, now choosing the play the role of the good cop. "Sweetheart, you are my baby girl, my one and only, and I am scared to death for you. You father and I only want to protect you. Jacob is. . . Well, he will only end up breaking your heart, whether he intends to or not. Please, try to understand our point of view? I know you think I'm the bad guy, but what I say or do is out of love."

It was hard, painful, but Renesmee managed to swallow the heavy lump of melancholy emotion. "You don't know him." _Anymore_.

"Yes, I do, better than you," yet Nessie somehow found cause to doubt this statement. Rachel and Rebecca Black had been Bella's childhood playmates, not Jacob, and though they had eventually become best friends later in life, Nessie couldn't believe that she knew the man Jacob was now. "He will find real love one day and you can never be that for him. I am warning you, Renesmee, don't get involved with Jacob. He's damaged goods and that's what you'll be if you don't stop this right now."

"I know, I know. I know I am an utter moron for feeling this way about Jacob, and this might be the most selfish thing in the world, but this could very well be the only shot I ever get for a love of my own. I can't bother to be frightened by the future, or deny who I am. So, don't ask me to." Nessie's mahogany vision glanced to her silent father, who now seemed to be listening with an open mind, unlike Bella. He knew exactly what she was going through, him being a mind reader, after all.

"Renesmee, I won't dispute the fact that Jacob is a good man. He has risen to the occasion of heroism more times than I could keep track of. I don't doubt you will be the best for him, but your mother has a credible standpoint," Edward spoke, keeping is tone even. "We set these rules in place for your safety, sweetheart. Although, they may not always seem beneficial."

"Say what you want. It doesn't matter. You can't change my mind. Jacob could be imprinting right now for all I know, but that doesn't mean what we feel for each other isn't just as real. He's magnificent," Nessie explained, hopefully getting through to Edward at least.

Just thinking about Jacob set her mind at ease, tranquility washing over her body where she had been tense mere instances ago. Laughter bloomed and bubbled within the confines of her stomach when she recalled awakening that morning with her body snuggled securely between Jacob's arms and his chest as his chainsaw snoring vibrated the gravel. It was crazy, to be out all day with a complete stranger—kissing him, sharing her secret place with him, racing him through the forest—but Jacob certainly didn't feel like a stranger.

Nessie swore she had gazed upon Jacob's gigantic grin a million times before.

"It's a fling," Bella said, interrupting Renesmee's musings. "You'll get over him. It will pass in time, honey. Forget about Jacob before it's too late."

"It already is, Mom, but I'm not afraid. Why are you?" Nessie inquired, her curious words whispered delicately.

"You are my daughter! Mine! Don't ask me to turn the opposite direction while the mongrel has his filthy paws all over my precious, little nudger!"

"Ugh!" the half-breed scoffed. "I am not a baby anymore and would you like another fact of the day? All of this is extreme, but I'm not a real, existing person without Jacob."

"Renesmee, darling. . . Does Jacob care about you?" Edward questioned, softly walking closer.

"Yes," she replied, nodding. "I dare to believe he cares about me in the same way I do for him. In spite the way he tries to hide himself away from me, Jacob wants me, too. I mean, he told me so," that is, unless she dreamed of _Nayeli_ being murmured. "Even if all this amounts to nothing, he and I could still be great friends." And Nessie could live with that. It wasn't a situation of get or gain for her.

Edward heaved a sigh and smiled. "Bella, we must not begrudge our daughter when she is making her own decisions as a young woman, despite it may be a horrible mistake. Renesmee refuses to budge," he stated in admiration.

"Be quiet, Edward!" Bella snapped, snarling. "You don't what the hell you're talking about! Jacob is bad for Renesmee!"

"What can we do, love?" he queried. "We raised our Renesmee to own a strong will and an even stronger heart, which would eventually backfire on us. Above all else, she is an adult. She must pave her own road to happiness."

Bella rolled her eyes in exasperation. "This is insanity!"

Nessie looked skeptical. "Dad, are you really on my side?"

"Is your virginity still intact?"

"Of course!"

"Then, yes," Edward nodded, albeit in a strained hesitance.

The half-human half-vampire's face lit up into a dazzling smile, grateful and joyous. She leapt into her father's cold arms, embracing him around his upper torso. "Oh, thank you, Daddy! I love you!"

Edward kissed Nessie on her forehead. "I love you, too, Princess. Just tell Jacob Black that if he ever hurts you in any way, I will kick his sorry wolf butt from here to damnation."

* * *

><p>"I'm sorry for leaving you high and dry yesterday, Leah. It wasn't very cool of me," Renesmee apologized wholeheartedly, lounging on the couch in her best friend's apartment.<p>

Leah's eyes rolled, shaking her head. "Your mother is right, Rennie. He's no good for you."

"Then let me find that out for myself, Leah. Please? Don't attempt to control my love life like my mother," Nessie requested, frowning beautifully.

"Ren. . . Please, listen to me?"

"I am, Lee-Lee, every word," she retorted, tugging Leah's hand into her lap, gently stroking her bronze knuckles.

Leah growled, stealing her hand back. "Not lately. Not since Jacob Black."

The hybrid's shell-pink lips jutted out in a soft pout. "Leah, must we speak of this twice? We've been best friends since day one. Jacob and I could never have that. You're the one that taught me how to swim and how to through a left hook, remember?"

"I'd die for you, Ren. Jacob wouldn't," the shape-shifter woman retorted bitterly.

"That's okay. I would never ask Jacob to, or you," Renesmee stated, her brown eyes sad. It was disheartening to have her imprintor express her disapproval of Jacob.

"Ren, why him of all people?" Leah questioned.

"Because. . . Jacob isn't all people to me. He's got something extraordinary inside that I can't resist. I can see it whenever he looks at me. I love being around him," Nessie elaborated sincerely, smiling. "Can't you understand that, Leah?"

"But, Ren, you don't know Jacob. He's a runner, and that's what he's gonna do when things get too tough around here," Leah cautioned, having learned from experience.

"I'm not asking for a lifetime, just twelve more days," the half-human half-vampire said.

"Yeah, right. There's no way you'll let Jake go after that amount of time, little Missy. I know you, sport. You're gonna want the whole enchilada—the marriage, the sex, the house in the suburbs, the kids," Leah replied, half-joking and half-sullen. She forced out a laugh. "The moral of the story is to stay away."

"Fine, Lee-Lee," Nessie said, getting up to walk out the door. "If you can't be supportive of my choices, just keep out of this. I don't want your opinion."

_And in the half light a rush of violence is in your place_

_And if a look could kill, you'd need a license for your face_

_You say that love is blind and I'm the one who restores your sight_

_The girl who never knows. . ._


	15. Forevermore

**Disclaimer: Nothing belongs to me.**

_I can't think too much about tomorrow_

_The past is done and gone away_

_But there is one thing that I'm certain of_

_Wanna start me life with you again today_

_Damn this stupid tie! Why couldn't he just use the Force and make it form a cooperative knot? But ohhh no! Today would probably go down as the most significant day of his life, but his trembling fingers kept on fumbling around with the tie. Maybe Jacob could just go without one. Alice, that squeaking of a perfectionist, would certainly jump down his throat for it later, but he wasn't afraid of that pixie. That was for damn sure, especially on his wedding day._

"_Hey there," a feminine voice called softly. "Need a hand?"_

_Jacob turned away from the full-length mirror, sighing in resignation. "Please?"_

_Bella emitted a short laugh. "Come here, Jacob."_

_The shape-shifter walked over to his best friend with led planted in his feet, allowing her to fix up his dark blue cravat—embarrassing as it was. Jacob could resurrect all sorts of vehicles, but handling simple neckwear was too much to ask of him. _

"_You look really sharp and clean, Jake," Bella complimented through a sad smile. "It's funny. Eight years ago, all of this would have seemed frivolous, but here you are—marrying my daughter. Are you nervous?"_

"_Nah," Jacob replied, shaking his head—his fingers just didn't know it. "I can't picture myself doing anything else. Bells. . . Are you nervous?"_

_Bella exhaled wearily, finishing up her work on Jacob's tie. "It's entirely plausible that I am. Jacob, you already know that I think you and Nessie belong together. You two always did, you always will. You're the one who makes her glow and all I want is for her to be happy, but Edward and I only had eight years to spend with her. One minute, Renesmee is drawing a family portrait with crayons and the next, grown men are flirting with her from all directions! I guess I'm just going to miss Nessie."_

_In a pleasant humor, the Native American groom rolled his eyes. "I forgot how dumb you could be, Bells."_

"_Oh, that makes me feel so much better," Bella replied sarcastically._

"_Well, c'mon. I'm marrying Nessie today, not killing her," Jacob retorted, chortling his good-natured laugh. "I promise you're gonna see Nessie all the time—whenever you want." Unless they were christening some part of their newly furnished house. "With all the national holidays, birthdays, and anniversary parties, you will never have the chance to miss your little nudger."_

_Bella perked up, mirroring Jacob's wide grin. "Good answer. I'd have Edward kick your ass if it were any different." The vampire female hugged her arms around Jacob's broad shoulders, fire meeting ice in a friendly contact. "Alright, Jacob, you go out there and make this the best day of Nessie's life."_

_Jacob adjusted his tie somewhat so he wouldn't choke, and then saluted Bella. "Yes, Ma'am!"_

_. . . _

_Beautiful. Nessie Cullen soon-to-be Black was absolutely beautiful. Truth be told, she didn't an ecru-silk gown, a matching veil, and a fancy-shmancy hairdo to thieve the attention of the humble chapel; Nessie probably could have strolled down the aisle in plaid pajamas and still been just as gorgeous. She could put any Top Model to shame either way, without a single splash of makeup. And that how Jacob would have her forever. _

"_Dearly beloved, we are gathered here today to celebrate the sacred union of holy matrimony between Jacob Black and Renesmee Cullen," Nahuel's voice spoke clearly, for the entire congregation to hear. His teak irises seemed a pinch smug, having been ordained over the internet for this occasion. "Before we begin, the happy couple would prefer to share a few words with one another—to express the magnitude of their miraculous bond."_

_Jacob took a hold of Renesmee's pink palms as her knees wobbled, calming her down upon touch the way he always somehow seemed to know what she needed. Perhaps it was the magic of the imprint that let Jacob be so entirely attuned to Nessie's qualms; perhaps it were just the instincts deep down inside that caused him to react to Nessie so automatically; perhaps it was love. Lifting one of the hybrid's hands to his face, Jacob ghosted his lips over her ring finger where a Quileute promise ring sat._

"_Nessie. . . Before you came into my life, I was filled with so much hate and going nowhere—a downward spiral. I was closed up inside, dying a little bit each day and I could never figure out the point of it all, but I kept holding on reasons to live that I didn't know could even exist. Then, I saw the world through your eyes. It wasn't as hopeless as I thought it was, because you have faith—in everyone. You're so full of love and life. People gravitate toward you without thinking and aspire to be more like you. _

_You've got the kind of beauty that can't be earned through dieting or be bought with plastic surgery. No. You've got a brand of beauty that comes from the goodness of your soul. It's the kind that lasts forever. And I vow here, in front of our friends and family, that I will never forget how you saved me from myself. I will never stop being grateful for light you bring into this world. I love you."_

_Joyous water sprang to the blushing bride's milk chocolate irises, giggling the tiniest bit—the most musical sound in the universe—it could put a choir of angels to sleep. Nessie smiled, so stunning and so bright to the point where Jacob feared none of this was reality. In moments, he would awaken in his bed and walk into the kitchen for a bowl of cereal._

"_Where do I begin to explain my love for you? It seems almost preposterous to construct mere words from what we share. You have been there for me every step of the way. You had faith in me when I didn't, and you always reminded me of where I truly belonged. Jacob, I wouldn't be half the person I am today if you never there to make me laugh. Do you remember when we stole a shopping cart from a grocery store?" Images of himself pushing a red cart down the shores of First Beach, with Renesmee sitting inside the spacious basket, flooded through Jacob's memory. The sounds of their outrageously entertained laugh rang through his head. He had jumped inside with her, but his weight had been too much, and it sent them flying out on the cold sand, which only made them laugh even harder. "I never told you, but that's the moment I found out that you're the only one I will ever love this way. You make life an adventure; you make me complete. I love you, too, Jacob, and that's the thing that will never die."_

_More words were exchanged, vows were made, golden wedding bands were worn for the very first time, and small sniffles were heard from the wedding guests._

"_And by the powers vested in me, I now pronounce you Jacob and Renesmee Black, man and wife for all eternity," Nahuel announced. "Jacob, you may now kiss the bride."_

_Jacob and Nessie did as they were instructed, tenderly caressing each others awaiting mouth in a kiss that put all fairytale Happily Ever Afters to a dreadful shame. They must have kissed a million times by now—Jacob must have known how to travel around Nessie's delicious mouth without a map to help him out—but every time felt like the best time. Just as wonderful. Just as soothing. Just as electrifying. He could smell the salt from her tears falling down her cheeks and had to smile. _

_God, he loved her._

* * *

><p>Tap, tap, tap. Sigh. Tap, tap, tap. Sigh. Tap, tap, tap. Sigh.<p>

Jacob's restless digits drummed on the armrest of the couch repeatedly, busy contemplating the mysterious half-human half-vampire girl until his exhausted brain pulsed in his skull. What was it about her that made Jacob crazy? He swore there was something about Nessie that was familiar to him. Her smile, her touch, her kisses, her eyes. . .

"Was I right?" Billy Black inquired, snapping Jacob out of his thoughts.

"Well. . ."

"Well what, son? Was I right or not?"

"You already know the answer to that."

"I still wanna hear it."

The shape-shifting man rolled his eyes in surrender. "Okay. You were right. I was wrong. Nessie is fun to hang out with on a slow day."

A quizzical brow arched on Billy's forehead, tugging at his smile lines. "You two were out all night, Jake. Did you. . . ?"

"Sleep together?" Jacob finished, to which his father nodded once. "Yes, but not the you're thinking. Nessie showed me the stars and we fell asleep on the cliffs."

"That's so girlie," Billy remarked.

"Shuddup," Jake replied, slightly glaring.

"Seriously, it's about time," Billy said, the corners of his mouth curling into a crinkled smile. "It's hard not to love Ren. She wears her heart on her sleeves and on her worst days, she's still smiling. So much like you before Bella."

"Yep," Jacob agreed, popping the P. "I don't know what comes over me when I'm with her. There just this pull," like when the moon pulls the tide toward the shoreline, as if Jacob might have imprinted on her without knowing it himself first, "and it was there when we met, but I still feel like all of this is a mistake."

Billy let out a loud belch. "The only mistake made recently was eating Taco Cabana for breakfast."

"Dad. . ."

"What? For a man my age, that's a real daredevil move."

"James Bond would be very proud," Jacob commented sardonically, and then sighed. "Dad, can I tell you something?"

"Yeah, sure. Why not? I've got time to kill before American Idol," the old man retorted, chuckling lightly at his boy, who was without a funny bone in his body. Shame that.

"Gee, thanks," the werewolf grumbled ironically. "Um, I don't really like Nessie, not at all. To be honest, it's more than that. Maybe it has been since the moment I saw her, for all I know. I lo. . ."

Billy silenced Jacob by flicking his wrist to and fro, understanding of his reluctance to say what he was feeling out loud. Common sense tells us, after all, that falling in love in a day is nearly impossible, but in the magical realm where vampires and werewolves existed, common sense took an exit left. Jacob was a special case, and this love was going to take plenty of work.

"That's okay, son. I know it and you know it. That goofy look is in your eyes—you don't seem as miserable. Ren, or Nessie as you like to call her, has done you a world of good. If you let this chance go, I'm gonna ground you for life."

Jacob shook his head. "I don't deserve Nessie." His words came out in a whisper, ashamed of himself. He was an unappreciated, underpaid mechanic, not Prince Charming. He lived in a cramped apartment with a leaky roof, not a mansion manufactured from polished marble. He was a werewolf, sworn to assassinate her kind, not love her.

"You deserve more than you allow yourself to have." Words of wisdom via Billy Black.

"No. I was rotten to her, Dad—saying all sorts of crap—and I know Nessie needs someone who's sure about wanting to be with her," the shape-shifter stated, looking at his father expectantly.

"Ah, c'mon, Jake. Enough with your teenaged angst, please! You're a stubborn and a bit of an ass. That all comes with having too much to carry, but you're a good kid. A good man. Any girl would be lucky to have you. And do you remember what I told you?" Billy asked.

Jacob nodded. "Sure, sure. Behind every great man is a greater woman hold a leash in one hand and that great man's testicles in the other. Yeah, I know. You've been saying it since I was seven."

"Exactly!" Billy exclaimed, laughing. "So when is your first official date with Nessie?"

"D-Date?" Jacob stammered in inquiry.

"Uh-huh. The thing where two people, normally a male and female, chit-chat over a meal consisting of a salad, some sort of meat, and a soda, then do whatever fun activities, like going to the movies or taking a walk in the park. You did ask her on a date, right?"

"Er. . . Not in so many words or any, in fact. My bad." Jacob commented; although he wasn't so surprised that he managed to screw up once again.

Billy scolded him playfully, "Well, hop to it! Us Black man aren't stingy!"

* * *

><p>Knock, knock!<p>

The Cullen's front door flew open, and there stood a blonde demon. She huffed through her nostrils, unimpressed by Jacob's intrusion on their home. "Oh, look! It's Lassie!" Rosalie exclaimed in feigned glee. "What do you want, dog?"

"Where's the rest of your coven, Goldie Locks?" Jacob queried, peering carefully inside to see the place vacant.

"If you must know, Emmett and Jasper are playing videogames upstairs and everyone else is trying to ignore the displeasing fact that you exist. Okie dokie. You came, you saw, you didn't conquer. Bye-bye!" Rosalie exclaimed in pretend cheer and began shoving the door shut, but Jacob, ever the persistent pup, pushed his way inside the magnificent manor.

"Hey, hey! Wait a minute, Blondie. I know Nessie's here." He could smell her from where he was standing. "I wanna talk to her," he requested, stifling any oncoming signals of desperation.

Rosalie tossed her flaxen tresses over shoulder, impatiently crossing her arms. "If I give you a Scooby Snack, then will you leave my niece in peace?"

"No."

"Damn. I really shouldn't even let you live, mongrel," Rosalie said, the two glowering dangerously back at each other.

"I just have one question to ask her and then I'll be out of your hair," Jacob swore, shrugging and tapped his foot against the wooden floorboards.

"Get. Lost." Rosalie told him through gritted teeth, her tone seething in anger.

"I'll be quick," he promised.

"Oh, I have no doubt about your speed, mutt," Rosalie growled, her nose wrinkling at his putrid scent. (Did she just mock his stamina? Low blow). She sighed in defeat, and jabbed an index finger in the kitchen's direction. "Go."

Jacob skedaddled swiftly, but he didn't expect to walk in on a sight that was a billion times better than any lame-ass porn: To whichever song the girl-woman was singing to herself, Renesmee slowly twisted her hips as she swung open the refrigerator door, in a way that made Jacob ponder the weird nature of such a creature. At times she seemed so innocent, and others she was dropping it like it's hot.

Suddenly, Jacob's jeans were much too tight. Did Nessie realize how sex she was?

He watched Nessie with enticed brown eyes, observing how her shorts hugged the plump cheeks of her ass, pretending that he could extend a hand and smack it lightly, and she wouldn't be offended. Nessie took a tiny sip out of a water bottle and put it back, then closed the door. She kept up her dancing, arousing poor Jacob until the teeth of his zipper bit into his manhood, wriggling her slender curves and made his skin blaze.

Finally, Nessie met Jacob's amused gaze, but only stopped after shimmying—unashamed of her fun. "Oh, hello!"

Jacob waved at her. "Hi."

"How long were you standing there?" Renesmee inquired, tilting her head.

"Long enough to envy the refrigerator," he retorted, teasingly waggling his eyebrows at her. He took one step forward, then decided against it. If Jacob got any closer, he might have jumped her, and that wouldn't do him any good.

"Well, I hope you enjoyed the show," the half-breed replied.

"Immensely," Jacob answered licking his lips.

She giggled. "Is there a reason why you're here?"

"Um, a date," he started nervously, his palms sweating a little bit. "As in do you want to go on one with me?"

"Right now?" Nessie asked; he nodded and she beamed excitedly. "Yea, of course! Give me twenty minutes, okay? Yay!" She laughed, kissed Jacob's blushing cheek, and dashed upstairs.

_So what do you say we fall in love again?_

_Just like it was when we first met_

_So what do you say we try our love again?_

_'Cause you know we belong together_

_And I know this time it's gonna last forevermore_


	16. Tonight I Love You

**Disclaimer: Nothing, as you know by now, belongs to me. Sawry. Song by the Latency! **

_It's a beautiful night and I'm opened up_

_The look in your eyes says so much_

_Nothing can touch us out here_

_Don't know where we are, but I know what I see_

_A beautiful girl walking next to me_

_I need to hold you, my dear_

_Let's just take tonight, tonight slow_

_I wanna see where this, where this goes_

_I need you_

Jacob decided he would behave like a gentleman tonight for their date, and a true gentleman always pulls out a seat for the woman he was currently in the process of courting; therefore, he did it for Renesmee. She fluttered down, ever-gracefully of course, her auburn loops swinging, smiling affectionately up at Jacob as he scooted her close to the table.

"I'm really sorry I couldn't take you to any place fancier, you know where they serve escargot on silver platters," he apologized, sitting down adjacent to her.

"Don't be silly, Jacob. Olive Garden is lovely," Nessie replied reassuringly. "Italian food is my favorite, so dinner is going to work out splendidly."

"Really?" Jacob queried—unconvinced, but touched. "No offense, I just figured a rich girl such as yourself would prefer restaurants with string quartets, expensive pink champagne, chandeliers bigger than the sun, and dudes with European accents." Other than the fact she was much more than simply appealing, he remembered thinking that she was way out of his league when they first met.

Nessie quirked a slightly insulted eyebrow. "It seems you misjudged me."

"That's the understatement of the century," Jacob said, rolling his eyes at himself.

"Well," the half-vampire half-human girl started patiently, "you are not totally wrong. I'm no stranger to all those things you must graciously mentioned, and on occasion, I do find the lot quite enjoyable. Granted, the taste of alcohol is absolutely vile, and I'm much more accustomed to water. But I also like eating at small burger joints, where they play mainstream Hip-Hop music on the radio, and the waiter-person is wearing polyester pants and a matching promotional cap."

Jacob studied the shape of Renesmee's raspberry lips—how they moved fluidly whenever she spoke—so eloquent, so soft, so mesmerizing. He could listen to her form sentences for countless hours, even if she were to recite numbers out a monumental phonebook. It didn't really matter either way.

Renesmee was enthralling, everything about her, from her head to her toes—he couldn't resist the strong, gravitational force pulling him to her. By now, Jacob was overflowing with this dreadful, growing love. Oh, it didn't make any sense. All of this, everything that surrounded the two, was bitter and sweet. Awful and amazing.

What was it about Nessie that made her so damn special? More importantly, when could he kiss her again?

"You're the type of girl that goes with the flow." Not many girls could act in such a way. Most of the ones Jacob had encountered over the years somehow calculated every motion, every movement of the night—if they would proceed to a kiss, sex at her or his place, and whatnot. "I should have known. I'm sorry," the Native American man apologized again, looking as if he were on trial.

Nessie shook her head at Jacob, flicking her wrist at ninety degree angle. "Believe me, there is no need to feel sorry, Jake. I appreciate the effort more than you seem to aware of, but you don't to try to impress me. Be yourself, Jacob. That's who I'm attracted to," she told him gently, her milk chocolate eyes warm and soft and beautiful.

"Ah, you say that now. Wait until you see my bedside manners," Jacob retorted in jest.

Finally, the waiter, clad in a white pastel shirt, black slacks, and matching apron, came by with a happy go-lucky disposition. He was blond, blue-eyed, and had marshmallow-white skin—a real cheeseball, but familiar in a horrifying way.

"Good evening. My name is Mike, I will be your server tonight."

Somewhere in the depths of the twenty-four year-old man's mind, his brain exploded into a thousand pieces. It was an exact 'Wtf!' moment.

"Oh, crap," Jacob muttered under his breath; only Nessie would be able to hear him. "Newton. . ."

"Jacob Black!" Mike exclaimed, giving Jacob a chummy smack on the back as though they were the best of pals back in the day, and Jacob suddenly wanted to tear the stupid guy's arm out of its socket. "Man, how you do—Hello there," he greeted, glancing at Nessie in mystification and arousal. Could Jacob blame Newton for giving Nessie that look? No. Not really, but he had better back off. "Who's your friend, Black?"

"Hi. I'm Marian," Renesmee fibbed.

Mike threw a coquettish grin down at her. "Well, meeting you has been the highlight of my suckish day, Marian," he said.

"Right back at you, champ." The half-breed shot him a dazzling smirk, though it was unamused and agitated. She looked over the menu, and then handed it to Mike. "I will have the Chicken Alfredo with a pink lemonade, please and thank you."

"Yeah. And, uh, I'll have the spaghetti with a Coca-Cola," Jacob ordered, struggling to keep his tone polite while Mike Newton staring at _his_ Nessie, peaking down her v-cut tee shirt.

"Okay, I'll be right back," Mike grinned at Nessie like the Cheshire Cat, then walked away.

"Take all the time you need!" Jacob called back.

"Hey, isn't that the same guy that had a gigantic crush on my mother?" Nessie whispered in question, her expression entertained and outraged.

"Yeah," the shape-shifter nodded, and then shrugged cheekily, "except you're his new wet dream."

"In that case, Mike Newton doesn't differ much from you," she replied, a smirk creeping on to her full mouth—knowing and beguiling.

"By the way, why didn't you give him your real name?" Jacob queried curiously.

"And have that creeper call out my name when he wanks it later tonight?" Renesmee's face twisted and screwed in indisputable disgust. She pretended to gag, and kept on, "Ew, gross! No thank you!"

Jacob grinned, chuckling lightly. His hand balled into a fist, and bumped his knuckles to his date's. "Cruel, Nessie. That's real cruel."

This was by far the best date he had ever a part of, and yet there was no guarantee for sex.

"What change from two days ago," the half-breed said, sighing and laughing.

"Not really. Ever since I discovered that girl I met in the cafe was actually Bella and Edward's darling daughter, I tried to tell myself that there was no way in hell that I could could be attracted to you. . . but any walls I had, you're walking right through them. It's weird. I do feel something for you." Jacob explained.

He racked his brain through all the seconds he had spent in Renesmee's company so far. Every moment, every instant had proven to be a thrill, always leaving him thirsty for more—to merely have his heart jolt in anticipation.

"What do you feel?" Nessie timidly questioned, fiddling with a loose string dangling from the deep green tablecloth.

"Mostly confused." Between the reoccurring sensation of familiarity and visions of some sort of life—perhaps a future, maybe the past. It was an insane thing to try to elaborate on. Jacob took Nessie's hand in his, tracing the J-shaped vein beneath her porcelain skin. "Not about you, about me."

"Because we're so different?" And about a million other different reasons.

"Yeah," Jacob confessed. "Maybe that's why I'm drawn to you. You know, sometimes it feels wrong, like I'm not good enough for you." Yet, at the same time, he had an overwhelming sense of purpose, as though Jacob was never supposed to be anywhere else unless it was at Nessie's side.

"Let me tell you something, Jacob. I would rather be wrong with you a thousand times over than right with a guy who bores me to death any day of the week. Also, you can let me worry about if you're good enough or not. I pride myself on having a stellar sense of good character, and you more than measure up," she told him, her eyelashes scraped against the tippy-top of her high cheekbones.

Leave it to Mike Newton to spoil a moment.

He arrived with a silver tray, setting down the couple's food betwixt their extended hands, and thus the touch of one another was separated. "Here you are. Sorry that took me so long!" Mike handed a paper napkin over to Nessie, leering lustfully as though she was some hussy as a cheap bar.

Nessie giggled humorlessly, pretending to be charmed. "Thank you. . ."

Mike Newton once again strolled away, this time a shade more chipper, as Renesmee unfolded her waiter's message, which she answered with a roll of the eyes and a scoff.

"What is it?" Jacob asked.

"He gave me his number," Renesmee responded, showing him the scribbled digits.

Jacob grabbed it away from Nessie incredulously, crinkling the napkin into a thin ball. "That bastard. . . I mean, seriously. In the words of Stephanie Tanner, '_How Rude_!' I'm the one on a date, and Newton has the guts to try to get lucky!"

And then, Nessie retrieved it back. "Mike is bold. Obvious, but bold. I'll give him that. On the bright side, I can prank call him later on when I get bored enough." An impish simper graced her apple-red mouth, shrugged mischievously.

God, Jacob loved Nessie.

* * *

><p>Serene was the indigo nightfall, the stars shimmering high above in the silent sky. The small City of Destiny rested peacefully, only where the eagle owls hooted and the baby swallows slumbered in their secure nests. There was not a singular responsibility to imprison a werewolf and a half-human half-vampire hybrid, an obligation to pursue the natural enemies in their tracks of happiness. Simply being together, walking hand-in-hand through the park, was one of the most invigorating feelings in the known universe.<p>

Everything was down and dry—his stone defense collapsed, his ice-brick shield lowered into the dusty dirt, his swampy mote became a drought, his sharp spears stabbed elsewhere. Jacob was far too lazy to be on-guard, at least when he was around Nessie.

"It's such a beautiful night, don't you think?" My parents used to take me out hunting at night when I was a little girl," Nessie admitted, exhaling flatly.

"Why not anymore?" Jacob asked.

"I don't know," the hybrid shrugged her shoulders, her tone perplexed. "It just stopped being a tradition." All of a sudden, Nessie's expression lit up, beaming and pointing toward a playground. She started bouncing up and down, like a giddy child. "Oh, look! Let's play!

Jacob arched an eyebrow. "Play?" the Quileute Indian repeated. "Nessie, I'm not eight."

"Yeah, but I am," Renesmee stated matter-of-factually. She nudged her in elbow against Jacob's multiple abs, and winked. "C'mon, please? It'll be fun!"

"No way!" Jacob protested. "I'll look stupid."

Nessie criss-crossed her arms over her chest, furrowing her eyebrows. "To who will you look stupid to, Jacob? It's only you and me out here, all alone. . ."

The enticing half-breed tilted her head; and Jacob's mouth, in turn, yearned and watered in anticipation for the silk texture and sweet taste of those Garden of Eden lips that could only be owned by the ever-beautiful, ever-tempting Renesmee. He was sure she could hypnotize an army of men to bow down to her every whim.

Their lips entwined, tenderly yet eagerly. And thus, Jacob let Nessie sucker him into conceding to her will.

"Fine," he sighed. "You win."

"Please, tell me something I don't already know. Tag, you're it!" Renesmee swatted Jacob on the chest, then dashed off to the playground. "Come on, you slow poke! Can't catch me!"

Renesmee wrapped her hands around the green handlebars, causing her pink palms to turn red, and then slid through the square hole of the monkey bars. She employed the jungle gym as a bridge to journey to other side of playground, where the slide echoed her name sweetly, with Jacob trailing closely behind her. The woman giggled, and the man couldn't help himself from chortling.

Truth be told, being silly was a blast.

"Betcha I can!" Jacob declared in determination.

"No, you can't!" Nessie replied in a sing-song voice.

Nessie crawled through the archway of the slide, flinging herself down at a ready speed. Jacob attempted to copy her, but his built frame wounder stuck between the teeny-tiny space.

"See? You can't even fit your big butt through there!" Nessie giggled, planting her feet on the gravel.

"My butt is not big,you're just a midget!" the shape-shifter retorted, wedging himself through the opening and slid down the inclined plane. When he reached the bottom, all Jacob did was lie there as though it was a comfortable mattress. The youngest Cullen climbed back on the wide slide, straddling Jacob's waist. He grasped her hips, still laughing."Caughtcha!"

"Mhmm, so you have," she answered, nodding. Nessie rewarded Jacob with another kiss, allowing Jacob's tongue to massage her own in an easy passion. He savored the flavor of her mouth—sugary and forbidden in all her mystery. "Not that I particularly mind."

Jacob swept a strand of reddish-brownish hair behind Nessie's ear, basking in the alabaster tint of her flesh glowing in the dim moonbeams. Mercy, kindness, affection, lust, compassion, love, a story untold—it was all there—in Renesmee's eyes. Her eyes brown, like melted milk chocolate chips, bewitching him into oblivion. A heart-warming blush colored her cheeks, and his heart pounded in a frantic tempo. He had been wrong the whole time.

The creature before his opened eyes, a slow process similar to the healing of a man blind to the sun, was not a demon spawn. Maybe she was some type of angel in disguise, better than anything else this world had to offer—too good for it, in fact. Jacob couldn't stifle the message of his heart. He loved her.

"Nessie. . . You're. . ." His statement died on his tongue when Nessie placed her index finger on his lips, silencing his hesitance.

"_Jacob, you're more than sort of beautiful_," Nessie complimented quietly, using her communication ability to show him just how he looked through her eyes—glowing russet skin with a caramel tint, the most beautiful smile in the world, dark brown eyes with a small ring of honey encircling the iris.

She, too, was entranced.

_I'd give you the day but it's not mine yet_

_I'll ask you to stay here with me 'til then_

_I think I'm falling for you_

_I need you_

_I just wanna look in your eyes and see_

_All that you have looking back at me_

_I think tonight I love you_


	17. Keep Holding On

**Disclaimer: Nothing belongs to me! Song by Avril Lavigne.**

_You're not alone_

_Together we stand_

_I'll be by your side_

_You know I'll take your hand_

_When it gets cold_

_And it feels like the end_

_There's not place to go_

_You know I won't give in_

_No, I won't give in_

"So, are you courageous enough to walk me to front door?" Renesmee queried, smiling that disorienting smile.

The same one that caused his own will to melt into hers, the same one that could thaw glaciers into azure oceans.

Beautiful and innocent and sunny. She had a sunny smile, even in the depths of the perfect night.

"Courageous enough? Not even close. Stupid enough? Definitely. Your wish is my command," Jacob retorted playfully, incapable to withstand the oncoming simper tugging at the corners of his mouth. He grinned, dimples forming on his two, copper cheeks. "And if you want me to risk my life by walking you all the way to that door, Fates be damned! I'll do it!"

"My, my, my! How chivalrous!" she verbalized giddily, the faintest rose-pink blush spreading throughout the paleness of her terrific cheeks, and fluttered her black-rimmed eyelashes at him mockingly; could she hear the rhythm of Jacob's heart throb in a frantic frenzy? Nessie glanced at the ground, then back at her werewolf companion. "That's actually—. . . Strange. . ."

Her head tilted to the side, much like a perplexed puppy would do.

"What is strange?" Jacob questioned, watching Nessie's face scrunch up into a look of uncertainty.

Wow. He had never seen her unsure of anything, until now.

"The forest is," Renesmee answered, her milk chocolate brown eyes quickly appraising the area in a fearsome paranoia. "I mean, it's suddenly silent."

"So?" the shape-shifter pressed, lifting a black brow.

"It's a forest, Jake. It shouldn't be this quiet. There should be crickets chirping, owls hunting mice, or some sort of animal running around, or even a gust of wind," Nessie told him, shaking her head to and fro. "Don't you think that's just a teensy bit bizarre?"

"Maybe." Jacob shrugged nonchalantly. Although, he sensed Renesmee's terror, nothing seemed too suspicious. True, a quiet night was rare, but not unheard of. "Or maybe, all those woodland critters took one look at you, and high-tailed it to the safest part of the forest. Nobody, not even animals, are ever in the mood for being hunted."

"Maybe," Renesmee said, dramatically mimicking Jacob's relaxed tone. "I don't know. Something feels out of place, like we're the ones being hunted."

Her bottom lip tucked itself between those pearly-white teeth, nervously chewing, and the girl-woman shuddered when that sudden gust of wind combed through her lush, bronze tresses of hair. She let out a hiss, the soles of her feet frozen to the leafy forest-floor.

"Nessie, if we were being followed, I would have eventually caught some sort of scent or heard something by now. Don't worry. There's no threat," Jacob reassured, draping a protective arm around the half-human half-vampire's slender shoulders. Renesmee's goosebumps disappeared upon the warm contact, comforted by his concern.

Followed by a convinced exhale, the smile returned to Nessie's face. "You're absolutely right. I'm just being an idiot. I'm sorry," she apologized.

"It's okay," Jacob replied, spotting a white mansion, with all its lights beaming through the glass windows, through the tall spruce trees. . .

The Cullen house. That was the real danger.

"Here we are. Home sweet-" Renesmee's words abruptly came to a screeching halt mid-sentence when an audience of two appeared. One bearing a stern expression written all over her face whilst the other seemed all right, more eased, busying comforting his wife.

Edward's honey-brown orbs gazed upon the russet creature with their daughter being held in a tight embrace, slightly peeved with the peculiarity of the couple's new-found connection to each other.

"Well, this a nightmare realized," the male vampire muttered, pinching the bridge of his nose in typical paternal behavior.

"Get your hands off my daughter, Jacob Black, or I swear you will never be able to type a text message ever again," Bella Cullen threatened, standing as if she was ready for the deliverance of an inevitable, sure-fire attack.

"Relax, love," Edward said. "His intentions are pure. . .ish."

"Edward, take Renesmee upstairs this instant," Bella commanded, glowering hazardously at her old best friend, as the four marched inside the Cullen residence. "I need to have a speedy chit-chat with with her soon-to-be _ex_-boyfriend."

"No, I'm not going anywhere!" Nessie proclaimed in objection, stomping her foot in exclamation. Her dainty fingers laced through Jacob's long ones, renewing his heart with bold, Herculean strength and insurmountable determination.

"It's okay. I'll be safe, Nessie," Jacob stated easily, squeezing the girl-woman's hand to calm her down.

"Are you positive?" she asked.

When her presence was in his own, intoxicating his better, rational instincts—no, not at all. Jacob was never positive of the inescapable disarray he bound to get himself into, and all in the name of True Love. However, yes. Of all the instincts dampened and worn out, there was one of a very opposite caliber warring on—the instinct he, as well as his wolf brethren were born for—to love.

"You filthy mongrel! Her name is Renesmee!" Bella sneered, chastising him as though her were a five year-old boy with his hand embedded in a cookie jar.

"Just leave him alone, Mother," Nessie scoffed, rolling her eyes. "That nickname has grown on me."

Jacob didn't know whether or not to be feel insulted by Renesmee's somewhat bothersome concern, like he was a helpless infant under her mother's awful wrath, or to get all warm and tingly inside. At the moment, he opted for neither, because either one would have added fuel to the fire.

"Go, Nessie. Just trust me. I'll be all right."

"Mom, if you hurt him, I will never forgive you," Nessie murmured in promise, fleeting to an upstairs room with her father.

Bella sighed, throwing her arms up in the air, disoriented and frustrated. "I hope you are very, very delighted with your treachery, Jacob Black. A few days ago, Renesmee and I were the closest mother and daughter in the world, then you barge into our lives. Now, she can barely stand the sight of me. All thanks to you, I'm losing her."

Rolling his eyes, Jacob mentally went on a defensive rampage. Bella hadn't a soul to blame for Nessie's rebellion, but herself that is. Had she chosen to be more accepting of her adult daughter's decision, perhaps everything would still be composed between them. As it was, Bella had to go stick her nose where it didn't belong.

"Yeah, that was exactly my intention," Jacob began, his tone flooding with sarcasm. "Hey, I'm bored enough. I figured, 'Why don't I drive Bella and her kid apart? That'll keep me entertained for a little while!' It works every damn time."

"Don't joke around, Jake. I'm serious," Bella snarled, scowling.

"Get over yourself."

"I don't think you realize the magnitude of the predicament you are selfishly forcing Renesmee into. It's precarious for her. She is so young and stubborn," the female bloodsucker grunted, her eyebrows furrowed in bewilderment. "How can she be so certain of what she truly wants? Or needs, for that matter?"

"There is no predicament," Jacob retorted sourly, his face contorting into boredom.

Yes, Nessie was young, but she was ten times wiser than Bella gave her any credit for. More fun to be around, too.

"Of course there is!"

Jacob's oak gaze narrowed—dark and fiery—ice brewing wickedly in the cauldron of his chest.

"You can't stand any of this, can you? You don't want to see me happy, least of all with your coveted daughter. You want everyone to worship the ground you walk on and let their hearts bleed dry for you. Is the your game?" he inquired distrustfully. Any believability Jacob once felt toward Bella was long dead, buried beneath the shallow earth without a gravestone. "All the while, you're playing on both sides, and you want me and Nessie to be used as pawns."

"Is that truly what you think of me? A villain?" Bella questioned, having the nerve to act offended.

"If the shoe fits, wear it," he replied accusingly.

"Oh, don't be so holier than thou, Jacob!"

"Look who's talking!"

"Give me a break. I'm merely protecting Renesmee from the likes of your foolish lust, before you have the chance to break her heart beyond my or Leah's repair. And you have the guts to treat me like Madam Medusa. Jacob. . ." she started, her fury decreasing, "I don't begrudge you a happy experience, nor my daughter. How could honestly think that I would? But it won't work out. That momentous joy will burn out soon enough, like a dying flame on a candle. There will be repercussions to endeavor, none that either of us will wish to face. Trust me. Both you are heartbreak-bound," Bella forewarned, shaking her head in disapproval.

Her topaz irises looked on in a burdened appearance, as if a horrible future was being shown on the blank television screen.

"Do you even hear yourself, Bella? Nobody wanted you and Edward to end up together, and you had no trouble defying all that logic," Jacob rebuked, reminding the vampire of the past they once shared—the drama Bella was responsible for.

"That is very different, Jake. Edward and I love each other," Bella answered defensively, coldly glaring at Jacob as if he were ignorant of the notion of love.

"Whatever, Bella. I wish you were aware of just how damn arrogant you are. You think every relationship is inferior to epic, fairytale love story! And you know what I think? I think it's bullshit!" Jacob yelled, the wolf spirit up and roaring for release.

Screw that reeking leech, screw anything she had to say!

"Jacob, Renesmee is my daughter," Bella stated loudly as though it was possible for him to get that fact, her booming voice causing the walls to tremble. "I want you to be happy. Of course I do. We went through so much together—when Edward left me, when Victoria created a newborn vampire army, and you even surprised me at my wedding reception. Jacob, you have suffered so much for my sake, but the payment you're requesting is not something I will offer up as a consolation prize. Not Renesmee. You cannot have her."

"Oh, you have got to be freaking kidding me, Misses Leech! Nessie is not a prize, or money, or what the hell ever you think she is to me! That's just sick!"

The idea made him sick, his stomach churning in repulse. Hell, Jacob never chose to fall in love with Nessie. It never even crossed his mind to start a relationship with her to spite Bella. Kill her? Okay, yeah. He was guilty of fantasizing Renesmee's murder. But to play around with Nessie's emotions? No, Jacob would never torture anybody that way. Nobody deserved that pain.

"Just stay away from her!" Bella demanded, emitting a low growl from her chest. If Jacob bowed to Bella's order, he would never have to endure this argument ever again, and as tempting as that was, Nessie was worth it.

"Yeah, right. I'm not gonna let you boss me around," Jacob countered, chortling with an empty humor. The fight in his soul raged like a thunder storm.

He was in love with Nessie, and that was that.

"What's the point of it, Jacob?" Bella queried, skepticism evident in her hard tone of voice. If only she knew that she was armored in vein, her allegiance pledged to the losing side. "You can't imprint on her."

"I can't imprint on anybody, Bella." Jacob stated in a whisper.

"There is no future," Bella told him matter-of-factually.

Jacob shrugged. "Maybe, maybe not. You don't know that for sure."

The female vampire arched a tadpole-thin eyebrow, grimacing. "Oh, yes. I do."

Suddenly, Renesmee appeared between the two, pushing them apart.

"Okay, that is quite enough! Jacob, let's just call it a night," the young half-breed suggested, grabbing his thick wrist and led him back outside, into the chilly Takoma night.

"Thanks. For a moment there, I thought I was gonna phase."

"Jacob, please be honest with me. Is my mother going to scare you off?" Renesmee inquired, sadness transparent in those big brown eyes.

"If I can't scare myself off, Nessie, neither can Bella," he replied in a good humor.

His Nessie. His Nessie, who frowned. "She's really trying to make sure we're divided."

"Yep," Jacob agreed, popping the P. "It's only because she loves you so much."

"Too much," she added, rolling her eyes.

"Catch ya later, Nessie." Jacob turned away, walking down the front porch steps, his footfalls reluctant in their movement, as sorrow filled his opened heart to the brim. He didn't want to leave Nessie just yet.

"Goodnight, Jacob," the half-human half-vampire murmured softly, waving a hand at his black shadow.

He turned back around, taking three long strides to Nessie's side, where he belonged—maybe not forever, but for now was good enough for him. Either way, Jacob knew a small fact; he was in love with Nessie. It wasn't. . . It wasn't about the things he would take from Nessie, but about the things he would give to her. Bella couldn't see that.

"Whoops! I knew I forgot something!"

"What?" Nessie questioned, blinking in confusion.

"This," he whispered.

Jacob's tan pink lips took Nessie's captive, unable to give a crap if this action displeased Bella or not. So be it. There wasn't a single place he would rather be than with Nessie, experiencing the best kiss he would ever receive. Because it was love.

It is love.

_There's nothing you could say_

_Nothing you could do_

_There's no other way when it comes to the truth_

_So, keep holding on_

_'Cause you know we'll make it through_

_We'll make it through_


	18. I Promise You

**Disclaimer: Nothing belongs to me. Song by Judith Owen**

**Author's Note: Yeah, so I hope this answers at least a few questions about the goings-on of this story.**

_In the morning_

_When I awake, dear_

_Your memory comforts me_

_In the darkness_

_When I am frightened_

_I can see you in my dreams_

_Though I am far, dear_

_Though we have parted_

_I know the time can change nothing_

_So, if you feel afraid_

_And if your hope is gone_

_Just remember all these things I promised you_

"_What's the catch?"_

"_Leah!" the Alpha scolded, kneading his pitch-black eyebrows together in a warning glare._

"_No," Elizabeth Masen spoke in an abrupt murmur, hushing Jacob with a mere wave of the hand, but managed an understanding smile to set the poor man at ease. "It's quite all right to be inquisitive when such great powers are at work. I suspected there would be questions to answer, and Leah is correct to ask them. In return for my assistance, I require two favors."_

"_Yes," Bella immediately replied, lacking a second thought. "Anything you want. Name your price—money, clothes, jewels, a castle built in your honor. Please? I want my daughter's life back."_

_The middle-aged woman laughed softly, patting the desperate mother's arm affectionately. "I desire nothing of material value, dear Bella Cullen, fore I wish to give you the heavy burden of memory and secrecy. Only one must know of the promise transposed here today, but you may never tell or I fear this chaos will spread like wildfire once more. And you, Leah Clearwater, your obligation is to always protect Renesmee. Cherish her, love her, as your brothers love their imprints."_

"_You mean. . . I have to remember Renesmee's death? Why?" the mother demanded._

_Bella's lips parted, a delicate gasp escaping her exhausted vocal chords. If her heart could manage a tiny beat, it would split open wide for the universe to hear a mother's scream for her daughter, her perished little nudger; if her eyes could conjure tears, another arc would have to constructed from the strongest trees. _

_For all eternity, she would be forced to lie to her husband, to deny the truth from her own daughter. Could she honestly do that to her family? Yes. Of course. Anything and everything for Renesmee. Forever just wouldn't be a gift—it wouldn't be fair!—without her. _

_But why?_

_Elizabeth frowned, the flickering, dimming candlelight glowing upon her peach cheeks. "I know, and it's disheartens me to request it, but if Renesmee is to keep her life this time, she will need a mother's strength to protect her from an impending Fate. _

"_So, what is my purpose in all this?" Leah inquired, leaning back casually in the chair._

"_Well, it is similar to Bella's, except my magic shall bestow an imprint between you and Renesmee—a disingenuous imprint, however. You shall be her best friend, her sister, her protector, but never a true soul mate. That is not a magic I have the full ability to conquer, unfortunately. You and Bella have a task to keep Renesmee safe from harm," Elizabeth elucidated. Her emerald irises drifted upon Jacob's steady posture, as he slowly retreated into the polar icecaps in his soul—surrendering to the darkness. "Speak, Jacob. Are you having second thoughts?"_

"_I. . . I must always be separated from Nessie," Jacob said through parched lips, his voice hoarse and soft. To be away from Nessie was the equivalent of being cut off from truth, from reason, from happiness—from life. "That's it, right? They have a job, because we're bound to each other—forever. Would we meet sooner or later."_

"_Of course," Elizabeth retorted as if that was the most obvious fact in the world. "True love is both a blessing and a curse. Once you and my granddaughter encounter in the next life, Fate will catch up very quickly if Leah and Bella can't stop it in time."_

_Time. At the same time, there was too much and too little of it. The real enemy._

_Bella's weary golden brown orbs looked toward her best friend, resting a shaking hand on his shoulder. She knew her comforting wouldn't mean much to Jacob in his fragile state, but none of this seemed right. Deep down in her heart, Bella wondered how he could refuse Renesmee's sacrifice. "She wouldn't want this for you, Jacob. This isn't what she died for."_

_Jacob nodded, a liquid droplet tumbling down his paled cheeks. "I know that, Bells." How could he forget? "She's dead because of me, and if this is what it takes to bring Nessie back, so be it. Neither of us will remember." His words were hollow and black. He loved Nessie still and he would defy Fate for her. No price was too high. "Please, Bella, Leah. . . Keep Nessie far from me."_

"_I will try my best," Bella promised reluctantly, fully knowing she would be made to protect Renesmee from true love as well._

"_Okay," Leah sighed sharply, "I'm in, too."_

_Jacob forced a smile. "Thank you."_

_With a quill-pen firmly held between his nimble fingers, Jacob wrote his unwavering consent on the flimsy parchment. There, on the contract, Bella's knowledge of a love story never told was promised, Leah's protection to the young vampire hybrid was pledged, and Jacob's past was nearly erased. Perhaps he would never know everlasting happiness or true love, and he was okay with that. His soon-forgotten imprint was more important than any selfish treasure._

"_Now what?" Leah queried when nothing happened. The room didn't spin, the contract didn't light up, nothing._

_Elizabeth stood up, gesturing toward two exiting doors, carved from red wood and said, "Beyond those doors waits a second opportunity."_

_Bella and Jacob glanced at one another, already mourning the loss of their true reality. "Goodbye, Jacob. No matter what happens, you're not blame. I'm sorry it has to be this way." The female vampire arose from her seat, hugging her best friend one last time, and walked out into the blinding sunlight._

_Leah then got up, shrugging in a feigned nonchalance. "I guess this new life is gonna be pretty interesting, huh? I'll sorta, kinda imprint on your brat. Weird."_

"_It won't be easy, Leah," Jacob stated, twisting his wedding band around on his finger, and began listing all of his wife's faults, "Nessie's stubborn, wild, free-spirited, naïve; she always cheats in Hide and Seek." But that's why he loved her. "Are you sure you can handle it?"_

"_Don't worry, Alpha-man. I gotcha covered," Leah replied winking, smiling reassuringly, and followed Bella's footsteps out the door._

_Jacob exhaled, shaking his head as he glanced around the room, memorizing what he could of the surrounding wooden walls and the gray dust blanketing the cobblestone floor. It was a dull place and it was the last thing Jacob would see before history was permanently deleted. _

_He would soon forget the welcoming melody of Nessie's voice in the cold morning, the fruitful taste that would always bring new strength to his soul, the electrifying flower petal touch, the delicious vanilla scent clinging upon her ivory skin that would just make his day, the warm milk chocolate color of Nessie's beautiful eyes, and that smile that could save his life. Everything about her was what he would miss most of all._

_What would Nessie say to Jacob now if the wind could speak? _

"_No, don't do this," she would probably say to him, her tone pleading and apologetic. Surely, Nessie would probably grab him around the arm and never let go. He probably wouldn't want her to. "You don't have to, my Jacob. Please don't. . . Please don't forget about me." _

_Well, it was already too late to talk sense into him. She forgot all about him, what he would do without her, when she went and got herself killed; she was the one who stranded Jacob alone in a loveless reality._

"_All the precautions have been measured with the utmost precision," Elizabeth told Jacob, rolling up their agreement. "I will try all I can to assist you, but you must understand true love—it can never be wrong, and so, once it is born, it is immortal. I warn you now, be careful." _

"_Of what?" Jacob inquired dully, still imagining Nessie's voice chiding him._

"_Remnants of your life together with Renesmee may survive this deal," Elizabeth cautioned gently, her features aged with horrible wisdom. Jacob only found this woman to be mysterious and wondered how she knew so much. "Your love for her is very strong, and hers for you."_

"_Yeah," the shape-shifter half-breed agreed, rolling his eyes. It was love that got them into this disaster. "Too bad it wasn't enough." With that, Jacob finally stood up and shoved his hands into his pockets. "Thanks for all the help." _

* * *

><p>Somebody began shaking Jacob's shoulders roughly, until he subsequently snapped his eyes open.<p>

"Jake! Jake, wake up!" Billy's voice commanded.

The shape-shifter looked upon the russet features of his father—the flab of his cheeks, the wise wrinkles pulling at his eyes, the tired expression worn on his face. To Jacob, it seemed confusing to be lying here in his bed when his mind was still somewhere else, dreaming about an old woman and his signature.

Second by second, the became fuzzy and dark.

"Huh, what?" Jacob muttered, sitting up quickly, as his black-brown irises glanced around his room—mint green walls, a Sephiroth action figure standing atop the broken mini tv, an NFL poster hanging on the closet door. Being here had never felt so weird before. Almost wrong. "Wh-What happened?"

"You were having some sort of doozy of a nightmare," Billy replied, somewhat in a questioning speech.

"Yeah, I guess I was." Jacob mumbled in confusion.

Although, it certainly seemed real enough—the honesty of an untruth. The details were getting smudged—a deal for a deal, something about a wife.

"This is exactly why I told you not to eat a bowl of Lucky Charms before going to bed. Sugar gives you nightmares, but do you listen to me? Not, of course not. Youngsters these days think they always know better," Billy lectured, only half-serious as his index finger wagged mockingly at his son.

"Maybe I should start listening to you more often then," the younger man retorted, rubbing the sleep from his eyes.

"Good idea," Billy commented. "So, what were you dreaming about anyway?"

"I don't know." He sort of knew. "I don't remember." He sort of remembered. He must have been going crazy by this point. All these insane dreams, all these vivid visions—they made no sense. Jacob wasn't a psychic. What did it mean? "Um, what time is it?"

"It's five in the morning. Thank you for waking me up at such an ungodly hour, boy. I hope you're proud of yourself," Billy said sardonically.

"Oh. That sucks."

"Tell me about it. It's too early to be awake." Billy sighed, slumping his shoulders dramatically. "You know the rules—if the sun isn't up, I'm not up."

"This is Washington, Pops. The sun is never up," Jacob countered.

"Exactly."

"Well, I guess I'm not going back to sleep. Time to start the day."

"How depressing," Billy remarked, scratching the bristles of beard on his cleft. "Next time you have a nightmare, wake yourself up."

"Gee, I didn't know I was related to Grumpy," Jacob grinned at his father, who raised a mocked-insulted eyebrow.

"I'm not Grumpy, I'm Sleepy," Billy replied through a defensive mutter.

"What's the difference?" Jacob asked rhetorically.

"Smart ass," Billy grumbled.

"I'm gonna go call Nessie and maybe go for a jog later," Jacob stated, grabbing for his hotdog phone.

"Oh, sweet baby Jesus! He has a girlfriend now! Glory be to the Lord! It is a miracle!" Billy howled in a priest-esque passion, as if a choir was about to break out into a Hallelujah refrain, and clasped his hands together.

The would-be Alpha rolled his eyes. "Whatever, you old goat. Take a hike."

Billy wheeled himself out of the room, chuckling all the way, and left his son in peace. Jacob's rushing fingers dialed the buttons of Nessie's number, and waited for her to pick up. Dial tone had never been so damn annoying. By the fourth unanswered ring, he was about to call it quits and try again when she was probably awake; but thankfully, a feminine yawn sounded over the phone.

"Hark! The sound of angels!" he exclaimed teasingly, grinning to himself.

"_You couldn't have given me another hour, could you now_?" Nessie queried with another yawn. "_At least I got to hear you quote Shakespeare._"

"Sorry," Jacob apologized half-heartedly. "I just. . ." He wanted to simply listen to the sound of Nessie's voice, needing for the vibrations of her sweet laughter to echo through his mind. How could he have possibly gone myriad mornings without her? "I was wondering what you're doing later on."

"_Well, um, after breakfast, I have plans to go earring shopping with Madge_," Nessie answered; Jacob couldn't help but remember their dressing room escapades. "_But I'm free all afternoon if that's a good time for you._"

"Cool. Do you wanna catch a flick?" Jacob asked.

"_Yeah, sure_!" Renesmee replied enthusiastically, and he could practically picture the adorable, bright smile appearing on her beautiful face. "_Should I meet you there or_. . . ?"

"No. It's okay. I'll pick you up. We don't have to run again," Jacob said. However, he preferred the sight of Nessie's lower half, clad in tight-ass bluejeans, as he casually sprinted behind her and simply enjoyed the view. "Is there anything you wanna see?"

"_Not particularly. Surprise me_."

"Will do." He hoped Nessie liked Action films. Comedy films hardly were worth good spending money; Romance bored him into extinction; and Horror films were plain stupid to him, being a bloodsucker-killer and all.

"_Okay, I'll talk to you later then, Jacob! By_-"

"No, wait a minute, Nessie! I just wanted to say one more thing to you!" That he loved her.

"_Hmmm_?"

"Good morning," Jacob mumbled shyly, feeling a sheepish blush begin to consume his cheeks.

"_Oh_!" Nessie squealed in a pleased dismay. "_Good morning to you as well, Jacob_," her affectionate, melodic voice uttered as if she were actually saying, 'I love you, too,' incognito. Yep. Jacob's heart was about to burst.

"I'll see you later. Goodbye."

_I will move Heaven_

_I will move Hell and Earth to be where you are_

_And it might take this life_

_And it might take forever_

_I promise you_


	19. Shark in the Water

**Disclaimer: Nothing belongs to me. This latest song is by VV Brown.**

**A/N: I figured the previous chapter would elicit several more questions from you beautiful readers and reviewers, all questions I have every intention of answering in due time. **

_Baby, there's a shark in the water_

_There's something underneath my bed_

_Oh, please believe I said_

Quickly and most assuredly, Renesmee couldn't keep herself from falling hopelessly in love with the ever-handsome Jacob Black. She adored him with all of her heart—the way his large hands felt like an electric blanket upon her skin, the way his humongous grin set her entire world aflame, the way his feverish kisses tasted of dancing embers, and the way her named sounded from his bass tone. He was a perplexing specimen, more so now that he wasn't pretending that he loathed her. Although. . .

All that sexual tension certainly encouraged countless in Nessie's mind.

She thought back to Jacob's good morning phone call. It was pleasingly surprising, and by the time she hung up, her body went ablaze with a summer blush. And surely, Jacob hadn't a hint of an inkling of the effects he cast over her with his simple words. More than a few times, Nessie had to stifle any girlish, high-pitched squeals that might have frightened the oblivious man on the opposite end of the phone.

True love no longer was a story only meant for the characters in her favorite novels or an idealistic sentiment Nicholas Sparks perfected, but a dream Jacob was bringing to life.

As Renesmee ignored the passing trees and grass, she imagined herself telling Jacob the truth—that she was madly in love with everything about him. Perhaps, he wouldn't quite reject her, but nor could she quite trust Jacob to be honest in return—because she knew. It was often written all over the fibers of his being. He loved her, too, but Nessie also knew Jacob wasn't anywhere near ready to tell her yet. Yet, still, her mind envisaged: Would Jacob kiss Nessie on the forehead and say, 'Thank you,'? Would he kill their sorta-relationship thing? Would he just go back to Seattle?

"Ren! Yoohoo, Ren!" Marguerite yelled in a sing-song voice. "We're all back on Earth and we terribly miss you!"

"Huh, what?" Renesmee murmured exhaustively, awakening from her daydreams as her brain returned to the current moment. "I'm sorry. What did you say?"

"Oh, what does it matter? You don't actually care. You're too wrapped up in your personalized Jessie Narnia," Madge said, raising her new sunglasses as a makeshift headband, and kept her hazel eyes on the road.

"Excuse me. Did you just combine my name with Jacob's?" Nessie questioned, though, she quite cherished the simple syllables. "How very worldwide web of you."

Marguerite rolled her eyes. "Whatever. You love it."

"Would Jen make more sense?"

"No," Madge instantly answered. "I think that nickname he gave is you is too cute. Nessie. It has a nice ring to it."

"Yeah," Nessie agreed quietly, tucking a free curl behind her ear. "It's grown on me in the recent days."

Though, when she was a mere child imagining the inevitable day she would meet her future husband, there were times she could have sworn that name was spoken from the dream man's beautiful voice. When Jacob's mouth first uttered the sound, Renesmee somehow felt awakened. Altered. Alive. Actual. As if she had been dead for so long, and Prince Charming broke the Sleeping Beauty away from her one hundred-year slumber.

"Among other things, right?" Madge laughed knowingly, nudging Nessie in her butterfly-filled stomach. "You two are dating, after all."

"How on Earth did you find out about that?" the half-breed asked in disbelief.

"Jacob told Billy, Billy told Paul, Paul told Rachel, and Rachel told everybody else." That freaking blabbermouth. "So, how did that little romance happen, huh? The other day he couldn't stop rambling on about how much he hated your guts."

Nessie grimaced, pursing her lips. "I don't know. It is strange, isn't it? When I heard Jacob Black was visiting La Push, I anticipated this huge, tan, sullen shape-shifter, all tough and lonely." But she never expected to happen upon him at a breakfast cafe, and then fall in love. "But he's rude, arrogant, narrow-minded, stubborn, and-"

"Totally dreamy?" Madge offered.

"Yes, oh my gosh!" Renesmee exclaimed, her heart fluttering rapidly. "And he's so funny and spontaneously sweet! It's like I've known Jacob all my life. Does that sound stupid?"

"No. I feel that way about Seth all the time," Madge answered, smiling kindly at her passenger friend. "Look at you, Nessie. You're blushing just thinking about Jacob! That's so adorable!"

Nessie mock-glowered. "Oh, shut up!"

"Jacob and Nessie sittin' in a tree! K-I-S-S-I-N-G!" Madge sang in a loud, obnoxiously condescending key. "First comes Nessie, then comes Jacob," she winked at the unsubtle innuendo, and it was impossible for Nessie not to subsequently visualize her body entangled with Jacob's. "Then nine months later, a boy named Caleb!"

"Hush you!" Renesmee demanded, despite the fit of giggles bursting from her mouth. Suddenly, she did a double-take, catching the sight of something unfamiliar while she glanced at the road. "Madge, look out!"

Madge gasped sharply, instinctively slamming her foot her foot down on the break. "What the hell was that and where the hell did it go?" That was peculiar. Nessie wasn't, in fact, losing her mind. Madge had seen it, too, apparently. Now, it disappeared.

"That's a good question," the half-human half-vampire commented, trying to recover from the random shock. "Stay here, Marguerite. I'm going to check it out. If you see something remotely suspicious, scream as loud as you can." Renesmee instructed seriously, looking her friend dead in the eye.

"Yes, O Fearless Leader," Marguerite retorted, crossing her arms over her chest, rolling her eyes.

"Haha. Very funny."

The moment she stepped out of of the car to investigate, Renesmee instantly felt a sour fear overwhelm her body. As she ventured into the gloomy shadows of the green forest, she noted that nothing appeared terribly out of balance. Everything seemed ordinarily boring, in fact. The evergreens and the spruces were tall as always, the leaves were all kinds of autumn colors, and—unlike last night—there was plenty of sounds to be heard filling the forest air.

Yet, Nessie was scared.

And then, Nessie saw it. Her. A bizarre creature unlike anything she had ever seen before. She crouched down low behind the safety of a nearby bush, and merely observed this new being in all its mysterious wonder.

It, that inexplicable creature, was decorated in the sun's brilliant color. Gold hair, gold skin, gold face, gold eyes, gold horns, and gold fur. That thing, for the lack of a better word, was clearly female, too. Her upper body was shaped like a slender woman, her breasts covered by some type of gold armor, but her lower body was that of a full-grown deer. She had a very narrow face, adorning an unreadable expression—like a combination between anger, sadness, and maybe. . . curiosity? Scary, but oddly beautiful. Grasped in her right arm was a bow and strapped between her sharp shoulder blades was a quiver with many arrows, marked with fresh blood; and Renesmee had to swallow a heavy, burning lump building in her throat.

What is that?

As if she were able to hear Renesmee's thoughts, the woman-deer twisted her neck instantly to peer at the bush—directly looking at the frightened hybrid. She drew one, long arrow from her quiver and strung it upon the bow, then released it into the bush. Acting upon quick vampire-esque thinking, Renesmee quietly shifted away, but only barely escaped the penetration of the weapon.

Nessie blinked and the flaxen creature vanished immediately.

"Woah, I must be freaking out," she though out loud. "That's it—no more Lucky Charms before bed! Great! Now I'm even talking to myself, too. Come on, Nessie. Get it together, get a grip. You're cool, you're okay," Nessie mumbled to herself as she carefully wandered back into Madge's car.

"So?" Marguerite wondered.

"I-I-I'm," she stuttered dryly, "I'm not quite sure if I ever saw anything." It certainly felt real enough, but her mind couldn't quite grasp it yet. "We should go back home and alert the wolves.

"New earrings are overrated, I guess," Madge grumbled sarcastically, pouting her lips.

"I'm sorry, Madge. It could be nothing, it could be something."

"Yes, yes. I get the picture—I'm the defenseless human, you're not. Congratulations for being born into the supernatural universe! What do you want? A trophy?" Madge laughed, half-teasing and half-serious.

Nessie rolled her eyes. "Just start the car. I have to see Carlisle."

* * *

><p>"A gold deer, you say?" Carlisle questioned, stroking his chin in deep thought.<p>

"Not completely a deer," the hybrid replied. "It had a human half, too. Half-woman, to be more exact, like a satyr or centaur. I figured it anyone would have information on this, you would, Grandfather," Renesmee said, her brown eyes hopeful.

Carlisle smiled. "Your everlasting faith in me is most appreciated, dearest Renesmee, but I'm afraid Greek Mythology is your father's area of expertise, not mine." He gestured over to Edward, who had been studiously listening to his daughter's informative story.

Renesmee's attention transitioned from her fair-haired grandfather to her auburn-haired father. "Dad, do you have any clues?"

"I think she was a golden hind," Edward retorted.

"A what?"

"A golden hind," he repeated. "According to the many Greek mythology books my father owned, they are half-woman half-deer creatures that reside in lush jungles or forests. Their blood is said to have the power to kill a god or goddess with a few simple drops," Edward explained, his golden-brown orbs locked with Nessie's milk chocolate ones. "But they're not supposed to be real."

"Dad, don't be ignorant," Nessie said, quirking a brow. "If vampires, werewolves, shape-shifters, and half-breeds like me can exist in one world, what's keeping other fairytale creatures to abide scientific logic? Come on now." Duh.

"Are they a threat?" Dr. Cullen inquired.

"Possibly, but there are no gods among us," Edward stated, his glues still glued on Renesmee in crystal-clear worry.

"We should speak with Sam," Carlisle said, sighing heavily.

Nessie nodded in agreement. "That would be best. The wolves could potentially be in danger," including her best friend, Leah, "especially if these golden hinds are hunting them." _But we shouldn't assume they, if there is more than one, are the enemy just because they happen to be different._

"You make a very good point, Renesmee. This could entail a precarious dilemma on our hands if you don't act swiftly and carefully," Edward replied, resting a hand on his daughter's shoulder.

Then a thought sprang to mind. "Crap. I'll have to cancel my plans with Jacob."

"No. Don't be foolish. You'll be safer around Jacob. Your account has, of course, been saved to memory," Edward smiled softly, bidding the young lady away.

"Renesmee, he's right. Should any new details be discovered, it will be relayed to you. Don't worry," Carlisle added with a reassuringly nod.

"I'm not worried," Renesmee countered defensively.

"Renesmee. . ." Edward murmured in a flat voice.

"Okay! So, I'm a little neurotic. Mom says that I get that from you, you know. What do you want from me?"

"Just go. Have fun with that dog. That's an order, young lady." He gently shoved her toward the opened doorway, chortling when she almost lost her footing. "Just not too much fun! Remember, no trips to Vegas!"

Nessie saluted to Edward, smiling vibrantly back at him. "Yes, Sir!"

* * *

><p>As long as Jacob Black was in sight, life couldn't be more spectacular. There he stood, leaning on a vile contraption meant for road junkies, smirking like a tough guy on the Cullen's parking lot, dressed in a typical jeans and tee shirt ensemble. Renesmee inwardly swooned when he glanced up at her, when his smirk transformed into a full-blown smile.<p>

"Hey you," he greeted sheepishly, his voice husky and low.

_Oh, be still my beating heart!_

She walked right up to him. "Hey," she replied, giving him several, quick pecks on the lips. Nessie wanted to just rip off his shirt and make out with Jacob, but her mouth kept twitching in a too-big smile. "Where's your car?"

"I don't have a car."

"Alright. Where's Billy's truck?"

Jacob rolled his eyes. "C'mon. Those four-wheeled automobiles are so boring. Motorcycles are the real thrill."

In response to his massively wrong opinion, Nessie stamped her foot. "I don't think so. There is no way I'm getting on that death machine."

The shape-shifter tossed a helmet into Renesmee's embrace, and she held it on her hip. "Chicken," Jacob accused.

"You can name any poultry in existence, Jacob, but it won't work," Nessie quipped, furrowing either eyebrow in challenge.

"What're you so damn afraid of?" he queried, sighing in boredom.

"For starts, death," the half-vampire half-human replied.

It was highly improbable she would die if Jacob crashed; however, it still seemed like a tremendous risk. When Grandpa Charlie, for instance, retold the story of how Jacob stashed Bella's motorcycles in his garage, he also told her of the drunkards he found lying on the side of the road on a weekly basis. A cheap adrenaline rush didn't seem worth it.

"Just get on the bike."

"No."

"Coward."

"No."

"Nessie."

"No."

"I dare you."

Grunt, scoff. "Fine!" She fastened the helmet on her head and climbed on the vehicle of destruction, after Jacob, glancing around for handles.

Jacob chuckled at her. "I knew you would see it my way."

"Where are my hands supposed to go?" Nessie asked.

"Around me, stupid," the Quileute responded in evident jest. Nessie complied, encircling her long around Jacob's lower torso. Her heart nearly skipped a beat while her hands found full access to his eight pack, and she blushed. No. She committed herself to not feeling Jacob up. "But hey, if you're gonna grab me like that, I'm gonna need some sweet talk."

She giggled, slapping him playfully on the shoulder. "Bossy mongrel," Renesmee murmured in feigned annoyance. Her lips grazed over the back of his earlobe; her light breath tickling the bronze skin, and she could sense the chemicals of her Jacob's body ignite to create a blush on his face. Well, a blush and that dimpled grin Nessie loved so much.

Jacob coughed, trying to neglect his reaction to her. "Um, hold on tight to me."

"Always," Nessie promised.

_Baby, there's a shark in the water_

_I caught them barking at the moon_

_Better be soon_


	20. Wherever You Will Go

**Disclaimer: There is not a single thing in this story that belongs to me, except the concept. Song by the Calling, although I prefer the Charlene Soraia cover.**

**Author's Note: If any of you beautiful people have a special fondness of 'Abduction' or have yet to see it, I suggest you probably don't read the second half of this as Jacob Black will slightly express his opinion on the film with Nessie. (But I don't care what he says. That movie was awesome!) R&R!**

_If a great wave should fall_

_It would fall upon us all_

_Well, I hope there's someone out there_

_Who can bring me back to you_

_They sat in the penetrating darkness of their living room, as motionless as marble statues on the couch, and counted the seconds as they ticked by on the clock—dragging into an ending infinity. Autumn was outside of the door, where a light rain trickled down on the evergreens while the changing leaves were whisked off into the heavy winds, but the coldest winter doomed the season inside, where death crept painfully slow in the veins of the Alpha shape-shifter._

_Similar to the effects of poison instilled into the juice of a red apple._

_His Nessie. _

_He could feel her gentle fingertips trail up and down his forearm, but it almost didn't feel real to him as if she was a mere spirit—as if she were vanishing into thin air. In his mind, Jacob was begging Nessie to hold on tighter, to never let go of what was supposed to have been their always, but she wouldn't oblige. She was fading and there was nothing he could do to make her stay; he was practically allowing her to slip right out between his fingers._

"_Nessie," Jacob spoke suddenly, piercing the pregnant silence, kneeling down in front of her as he held her wrists in his hands, and needfully gazed upon the only woman that could give his heart deliverance. She was the fair princess and he wanted so much to be her guardian knight. "Don't ever leave me," he begged, a large chunk of injured sorrow swelling up in the back of his throat._

_The half-human half-vampire pulled back the corners of her mouth in an indulgent smile—a half-hearted attempt, though, Jacob noted. "Where would I go?" Her question didn't really require an answer._

_Jacob cupped his wife's soft, tulip-pink cheek in his burning palms. By now, every fiber of his being had memorized every perfect centimeter of Renesmee's flawless skin, and he just yearned for her to stay here forever. With him._

_She should have been born half-angel instead of half-human, anyway. A golden halo and white-feathered wings seemed more fitting to Nessie's eternal radiance._

"_Where would I go?" she repeated, her words murmured. "Tell me. I love you too much to ever go anywhere without you." _

_Her declaration was humbling to Jacob, but he could feel a stone barrier rising between their hearts. It just wasn't fair. Why couldn't Faethra just leave them alone? He would never belong to her; he was Nessie's._

"_I love you, too." His quiet statement. His truth. An utterance spoken in frailty instead of shouted to the world. Something he would soon regret. He should have said it louder, it should have become a mantra on his tongue. "So you can't ever leave me. Just stay."_

"_Jacob, we've been over this time and time again. Understand, please? There are so many things I would do for you—I would swim the entire ocean, walk barefoot through a field of shattered glass, and I definitely get beaten by a thousand spikes to ensure your survival. Is that any different than what you would do for me? And I promise that we belong together. No matter what happens, nothing will ever change that. You'll never have to spend a day without me, Jacob," Renesmee vowed, kissing her husband's forehead, trying to soothe the scars of his soul, but her sweetness wasn't a painkiller or any type of medication. Still, Jacob was grateful to her. "The thing I will never do for you is simply sit back and let you die without a fight. You are mine, Jacob, and you are mine to protect."_

"_Come here, Nessie," Jacob pleaded, getting up off his knees as Renesmee wrapped him safely in her arms. If only he could make his imprint understand that he didn't want her as a savior—she had already saved his life more times than she was probably aware of, anyway. _

_He snuggled his face into hers, trailing his lips from her blushing cheeks to her full, raspberry lips._

_Their yearning bodies relaxed into one anothers, releasing the intense atmosphere into the past for only a little while. It was not the time to disengage from his Nessie completely. Maybe he never would. He didn't want to. Jacob felt as though he was drifting out in the center of the ocean and Renesmee was the only thing keeping him afloat. Although, perhaps not for much longer._

_Levis bluejeans were unzipped, tee shirts were tossed away, undergarments were mangled into fragments of nothing on the carpet. Nessie lied back on the couch with Jacob comfortably on top, bare and stripped and ever-willing to caress and taste, her sweet, potent lust surging around him, awakening the wolf within. _

"_Jacob," Renesmee mewled softly, ringing into the air; Jacob reveled in the magical sound of the woman's voice as her legs trembled violently in desire, spreading wide open when Jacob descended into her hot, wet core. "Make this last forever," she requested, wrapping her long legs around his muscular waist and encouraged their coupling further. "Please, please, please!"_

_And if Jacob had been granted the knowledge that this would be the last time they would ever fit perfectly together like a finished puzzle, he would have done Nessie's bidding. He would have never let her go._

_But, just then, the night belonged only to them. With Jacob slowly stroking his thick, throbbing member in and out of Nessie's center, the couple grunting, screaming, and hissing their blatant pleasure. Her name sounded on the shape-shifter's taste buds repetitiously, his entire being glowing for his imprint when she gripped him around his shaft—warm and tight and nearly stupefying, beginning their fast climb into a breathtaking stratosphere. Jacob wanted to perish in Nessie's beautiful oblivion._

_He would keep her safe. In one way or another, he swore to himself, no harm would come to Nessie._

_After being given enough time to catch her breath, Nessie spoke again. "Do you remember what you told me on our first date, Jacob?" Of course. Jacob remembered every moment they ever spent together. It was their secret. Nobody else knew about their plans to meet again in Seattle—plans that orbited around hypothetical situations. He nodded in reply, and waited for her to continue. "That's where we'll find each other again—Seattle. I promise you."_

_Always. Forever. Eternity. All synonyms that would soon evaporate from existence._

* * *

><p>Nessie's legs shook, her whole body humming from conflicting sensations when she climbed of Jacob's monster of a motorcycle in a frantic, dizzy state. Her heart rhythm was rapid in her chest. All the while, Jacob was busy laughing at her.<p>

"Oh, my gosh! I'm alive!" the half-breed exclaimed, beaming at him.

Jacob rolled his eyes, hanging the helmets on either handle of his bike. "Whatever. You know you loved it. Admit it."

"Alright," she sighed in mock-exasperation, shrugging sheepishly. "That was sort of fun."

"Sort of fun?" Jacob repeated incredulously. "Nessie, you were having the time of your life. We both know it."

The hybrid's bottom lip was caught between her sharp teeth, a delicate smirk plastered upon her face. "Your motorcycle had nothing to do with my fun."

Damn. She was good.

In turn, a handsome grin splayed across Jacob's mouth, the hint of a blush on his cheeks and dimples showing. "Don't get all mushy on me."

"I am never mushy, Jacob Black, I'm merely gooey," Nessie joked.

"What's the difference?" he inquired, tilting his head to the side like a perplexed puppy.

"A mushy girl would never do this," Nessie whispered, rising to her tippy-toes and latched her eager mouth onto his, flicking her pink tongue along the entrance of his equally excited mouth. Although, when Jacob's brain finally urged his body to comply with devious request, that little minx pulled away—just to aggravate him. Jacob moaned in frustration, yet laughed all the same out of grudging respect.

Their foreheads pressed together, affectionately smiling.

"I love you. . . Um, er, your lips," Jacob said, his abrupt, mindless sentence strangling him.

"Oh," Nessie uttered, stepping away from him nervously. She seemed almost let down by Jacob's revision. "I love your lips, too."

"And your eyes," the shape-shifter added in hopes to cheer her up somewhat.

She looked at him interest, quirking a subtly amused eyebrow. "Really? What about my eyes do you love?"

His expression twisted into something of question—as if he had been asked to recite Einstein's theory of relativity—even if the answer was as plain as day, falling deep into those eyes of milk chocolate. He could see a brand new world born through her vision. "I don't really know." It was hard to explain. "When I see your eyes—when I look into them—I feel like. . . like I'm staring at a million steel cables."

Renesmee pursed her lips. "You already told me that."

"What?"

"You've told me that before."

"No, Nessie. I've never said like that before to anyone," he replied, shaking his head to and fro at the hybrid as she was a mental patient.

"Yes, you must have," Renesmee debated, staring at her feet and tried to recall his exact words. Jacob watched her in fascination. "You said something along the lines of, 'A new string held me where I was. Not one string, but a million. Not strings, but steel cables. A million steel cables all tying me to one thing—to the very center of the universe.' I remember you saying that to me."

"I'm sorry, Nessie. You must have dreamt that up," Jacob shrugged.

"Hmm, maybe," she replied, though she didn't appear convinced.

"So, what do you wanna see?" Jacob inquired.

"You're not gonna like the answer."

"Try me."

Renesmee giggled, wriggling her shoulders, and Jacob's mouth watered, finding that movement to be extremely sexy. "That new Taylor Lautner movie. . ."

A loud whine emanated from Jacob's vocal chords. "Ah, what? Why?"

"He is so gorgeous!" she responded giddily. "Ooh, what a hunk!"

"Oh, god. Gimme a break," Jacob groaned in sarcasm.

"In fairness, I did warn you first," Nessie countered, smiling ruefully.

"Is your heart set on that movie?" he queried, already whipping out his wallet.

"It doesn't matter."

The shape-shifter exhaled flatly, maintaining his signature warm smile for her sake—not that he was genuinely annoyed. It was astonishing how fun it was to taunt Nessie; but in truth, he was only happy to see her pleased. "Yes, it does. Come on, Nessie." Then, Jacob noticed her beautiful irises glazing over with tears. His heart instantly sank down to his stomach and in a blink, he was reaching out towards her pink cheeks to thumb away Nessie's moist emotion. "Hey, what's wrong?"

She shook her head. "N-Nothing. I just- Let's go see that movie."

"No," Jacob commanded, his bass tone slipping into a slight Alpha mode. "Tell me, Nessie. You can talk to me."

"I know. I was just thinking about how great you are," Renesmee confessed. She rested her palm over Jacob's fingers, set at ease on cue.

That's it. Lightning could have struck him dead right then and there—he could have died happy. None of this made sense. How could Jacob have ever thought this mystifying young woman was some sort of evil creation? How could he have hated her? Even worse—how could he have not imprinted on her already?

"Thanks. You're pretty great yourself. Are you sure you're okay?" Jacob asked.

Renesmee nodded, brushing her lips across his scorching digits. "Yes, thank you."

* * *

><p>Jacob quickly decided this 'Abduction' film was quite laughable. After about every other scene, he would playfully poke Renesmee on the shoulder and whisper, "Boner. . ." into her ear; and then, a bubbly fit of silent giggles would overwhelm her. His jokes were immature, but she didn't mind.<p>

"Boner. . ."

"Just by a shoulder touch?"

"He's just that easy."

By the time the big make out scene came on, both Jacob and Nessie went red in the face, practically dying of laughter. Needless to say, he hadn't expected to get such a kick out of a tween Action movie. He felt as though Nessie was a best friend he had known since forever. It was nice; it was fun. And a thought occurred to him: perhaps making La Push a more permanent resident wasn't such a horrible idea after all.

"She just sucked on his nose," Jacob remarked awkwardly to the half-breed.

"I bet he got a balloon-popping boner off that," Nessie replied in a murmur.

He snorted. "Oh, yeah!"

"What a sexy scene," Nessie, her voice sweet and wonderful to Jacob's ears.

Jacob draped an arm over her shoulders casually, to which she gladly leaned into. "We should go find a train."

"Yeah, definitely. I want you to squeeze my ass like that."

Then, a huge party pooper started making his way over to the giggling hyena couple, dressed in a navy blue suit and muddy loafers. He finally sat down in a seat next to Nessie.

"How are you doing?" His faux-gold tag had 'Manager' engraved into it, but Jacob honestly thought it should have said 'Creepy.'

"Fine, Sir," Nessie replied politely.

"Are you and your boyfriend enjoying the movie?" The manager's leering gaze raked over Renesmee's body, wetting his whistle as if he stood a chance in hell.

"Yes, Sir." Ah, Nessie. So sweet, so respectful. If only she would sock this guy in the kisser. He would deserve it—at least, Jacob believed so.

"You've been enjoying it a little too loud, young lady. If you keep it up, our security will be forced to remove you from the theater," Creepy the Manager threatened, not even bothering to look her in the eye.

Jacob stood up. "Come on. Let's go somewhere else, Ness. Do you really want to stay here?"

His hand extended for hers; and in the same moment, she accepted—instinctively.

"I'm going with you." Nessie arose from her chair, but quickly turned her attention back to the fat version of Neil Patrick Harris. "If you had listened to our commentary, you would have cracked up, too. Good day to you, Mister Pervert. Toodles!" Her bouncy reddish-brown tendrils whipped over shoulder, following Jacob out of the aisle.

When they made it out side of the theater room, Jacob smashed Renesmee against a wall. In an animal fervor, his mouth wove itself against hers, their tongues tenderly sampling each others flavor. His body burned and ached to have more of Nessie—to make her overflow with his love. He wanted to love her a different way now. It was amazing to feel Nessie's breasts rise and fall against his own chest, feeling her shaking fingers run through his raven hair.

"Jacob, wait!" Renesmee exclaimed, gently tearing their kiss apart. "Stop, stop, stop. Please. . ."

He halted any further advances, afraid he had gone farther than what she was ready for, but it would have been an obese lie if he denied that it wasn't positively arousing to have seen Nessie's lips going from pink to red and breathless. Renesmee leaned back against the wall, her alabaster skin flushing and glowing from all the physical excitement, and sighed sharply.

"What is it? Are you all right?" Jacob asked, lacing a single finger through her soft, bronze coils of hair. "Nessie?"

"We should go find a train."

Psh. Forget the train. They needed a bed!

_If I could turn back time_

_I'll go wherever you will go_

_If I could make you mine_

_I'll go wherever you will go._


	21. Sway My Way

**Disclaimer: Can you guess what this is about? Song by Bic Runga!**

**Author's Note: I'm so glad you all enjoyed that last chapter! You gals are the ones that keep me from giving up on this story! Special virtual pastries for you all! R&R!**

_And there's no cure_

_And no way to be sure _

_Why everything's turned inside out_

_Instilling so much doubt_

_It makes me so tired_

_I feel so uninspired_

_My head is battling with my heart_

_My logic has been torn apart_

The shape-shifter, Native American man gently closed the front door behind himself, surveying the space of his father's humble home, flipping the light switch, and noticed that living room was empty as well as the kitchen.

"Dad!" Jacob called in a vibrating shout. "Dad, are you here?"

"Billy!" Renesmee beckoned, but then picked up a piece of notebook paper that had been laying flat on the kitchen counter and handed it over to Jacob. "Here, Jake."

He scanned the note with careful haste, reading its contents:

_Jake,_

_I went fishing with Charlie and probably won't be back until after today's football game. Rachel brought Doritos and lasagna for you. Enjoy. Blah, blah, blah. Whatever. You're a grown man. Figure it out yourself._

_Take care,_

_Billy_

A mischievous half-smirk plastered across Jacob's tan pink lips, his ebony irises adorning a glint of sly intentions, eying his guest lustfully as she casually looked back at him. "We're all alone here, together."

"That we are," she nodded, her facial features animated with cunning, wonder, and lust. Beauty, mostly. It seemed a few naughty schemes were also playing across Renesmee's mind. "How do you plan on taking advantage of our interesting situation, Jacob?"

"Follow me."

Jacob hooked a strong hand around Renesmee's teeny-tiny wrist, dragging her with him down the hallway and into his room, where comfortable furniture called out the syllables of his full name, and sat her down on the mattress in a hungry fervor. An onslaught of pure lecherousness was about to overwhelm his body, savoring the sweet, fruity flavors of the half-human half-vampire's scrumptious mouth.

There was something magical about the tender movement of her lips against his, like the softest silk and the greatest flower petal. Nessie was leading him to the coveted precipice of mental instability, her arms embracing Jacob around his massively wide shoulders as if she were afraid he would disappear right out from her hold, into the vast universe.

And then, a small giggle erupted from Nessie. In turn, she pulled away.

"What? What's wrong? Did I do something wrong?"

She shook her head, her copper loops swaying to and fro. "No. It's just so surreal to be in this particular room the same time as the famous Jacob Black."

"Huh?" he uttered in confusion.

"Grandpa Charlie used to take me to visit Billy's house at least every two weeks, during footballs games," Renesmee began, rolling her eyes. "I would get bored by their beer-chugging and hollering every time one of the players would score another point. Then, I would wander off in here for awhile and contemplate what you were actually like," the half-breed elucidated, her fingernails lightly scratching circles around Jacob's forearm.

"So, you were basically snooping around?" Jacob queried jokingly. He really didn't mind. Unlike Embry, he preferred not to keep any raunchy magazines underneath his mattress or hide them in the underwear drawer.

Nessie nodded, her cheeks turning magenta. "I suppose. Most of the time, I would lie down on your bed and fall asleep until it was time to go home again. Some of my best dreams were had on this here bed."

His black eyebrows furrowed in blatant amusement, if not intrigue, and his imagination began to picture his Nessie as a young girl, lightly napping the day between the covers and sheets. She must have made an adorable child—even more sweet and even more innocent than she was now.

"Wow, that's weird."

She shrugged sheepishly, ashamed of her admission. "I'm sorry."

Jacob grinned at her ruefulness, resting his forehead against her warm one. "No, Nessie. That's not what I meant. It's not really creepy per se—the opposite actually—touching in a way." In a way, if Jacob ever chose to be genuine with himself, that might have meant they were perhaps meant to fall in love someday.

"Really? Well, I was curious about you. I still am," Renesmee confessed, smiling in such a way that could enrapture Jacob in a holy sphere of yellow light.

"I'm not really much of a mystery," the man-wolf said, crinkling his nose. In contrast to Nessie's vigorous presence, he was rather dull.

"To me you are," Renesmee replied sweetly.

She was full of heart and wonder, forever beaming with the truest light from the sun. How had Jacob not proposed already?

"That's even weirder," he remarked.

"Why?" Nessie asked.

"I've only known you for two days and. . ."

_And it already feels like a whole lifetime, like I've known you since the beginning of time._

It seemed her had known for several lifetimes.

"And?" Renesmee questioned, gently stabbing her index finger into Jacob's hard abdomen. "Please tell me, Jacob? No pressure, though."

"People I've known for forever should know me the same way you do," Jacob elaborated, hopefully clarifying his point.

Renesmee got him—understood him in a natural way nobody else did—more than his father, more than his former wolf pack who he was forced to share a mind with, and definitely more than Bella, his so-called best friend once upon a blue moon. But as some cruel twist of fate would have it, Nessie was the only one that could look upon Jacob, with eyes the magnificent color of the richest chocolate, and make him feel anything—real, exposed, attached.

"That's not true. I think when you finally open up, you would be amazed, Jacob. All of your friends and family know you more than you give them credit for," Renesmee said, expelling the most breathy of sighs. "If only you could give yourself and them a chance. Learn to let people in sometimes. Nobody, not even you, wants to be alone."

"Fair enough. Not letting people in isn't really anything new for me. I'm really out of practice," Jacob retorted, shaking his head in disapproval and behaved rather matter-of-factually. "I'm a blockhead like that. Sorry to disappoint you, Ness."

Nessie flopped down the mattress; her long, bronze tendrils blanketing his pillow, looking beautiful and sexy. His soul could have burst then and there from the sheer ecstasy of her warm smile. "You're too hard on yourself."

"No," he quipped, resigning himself to the truth of the subject. It wasn't a secret that he was an idiot and he wasn't going to pretend otherwise. "I'm honest about what I am."

"Then you haven't seen yourself through my eyes."

"Show me?" His request was put gently, curious now and craving for Renesmee's ever-serene point of view.

"My power?"

He nodded in conformation. "If you don't mind."

"I don't."

Nessie pulled Jacob down, his tall body relaxing comfortably over hers, and pressed her warm fingers against his russet dimples—momentarily, caressing his tender, copper flesh as it was the softest thing in the world—and proceeded to bring him into her world.

A world on fire.

She showed Jacob their very first meeting, how a tan and handsome man was suddenly spotted through her peripheral vision—everything sharp, clear, and bright. Never had she viewed such a flawless species of man before, completely mesmerized by the radiating warmth of the stranger's stunning smile. A fog vanished almost, the pictures becoming even more beautiful—glowing. The images seemed to dance with starlight, and all because Jacob entered in Nessie's universe.

It was definitely an adventure to see himself through this creature's contrast.

Then, Renesmee showed Jacob a montage of every second spent together. Even when he was bitching at Nessie, she found the beautifully redeeming in his faults. It was as though he was something to be cherished, like maybe she was in love with him, too. But that was impossible. There was no way.

"That was beautiful, Nessie," Jacob said when the flashbacks finished.

Why did Destiny have to be so damn cruel? Couldn't he just imprint on her? There wasn't anyone else in the world that could be better than Nessie.

"You're beautiful, Jake," she corrected him.

His lips crashed against hers, a long, fierce wave of consuming high temperature washing over him, feeling Renesmee's feminine curves shiver in raw delight. Their impatient tongues ventured, massaged, and entangled in an uproar of intense desire and affection, and Jacob secretly prayed that God would make this moment last forever, all but drowning in the delicious, savory tastes of Nessie's mouth.

All the while, the bed mumbled its apparent approval.

Mewling and moaning, Renesmee's dainty digits dug into Jacob's scorching hot shoulders, as Jacob's own hands traveled up her slender stomach as the bottom of her shirt rode up conveniently. Her heartbeat quickened under his taunting touch; he could feel her silk-textured flesh flush uncontrollably. Nessie hummed against his mouth, the sweet sound reverberating all around his tongue and consequently earned herself a nice groan from Jacob.

Then, his blood started to roam down south toward his groin, boiling in place and yearning for far more than what Nessie was bargaining for. Sex. Nobody had ever touched Nessie the way lovers touch each other. If they continued one like this, Jacob would be the first. And, with any luck, he would be the only one. Was she even ready to take a step like that yet?

He. . . Well, Jacob had never taken a girl's for virginity before, nor had he been in love while the deed was being done. But Nessie. She was different.

A new scent pervaded his room—her scent—the scent of lust. The wolf growled and howled to blow the house in, attacking Nessie's mouth harder and faster, brutally pained by the thick throbbing of Jacob's fiery length. Their hips collided instantaneously, like a clash between energy and arousal.

The spell was broken when her small hand started pushing him back.

"Wait a minute. Hold on."

Jacob stopped.

"I'm sorry, Nessie. It's cool. I'm stopping."

"Thank you. I'm not ready for sex yet."

Jacob understood; the wolf didn't. But still, out of instinct, the canine spirit huffed and puffed submissively, as they sat up on the bed, blushing and out of breath.

"That's okay. It would be too soon for us," Jacob said, almost winded from the stimulated sensations pumping through his veins. Nessie's scent was still fresh in the air. It would be so much easier for him if he could just give in to these physical urges.

"Us, Jacob? What are we?" Renesmee inquired with a curious, puppy-like stare. "People keep saying we're boyfriend and girlfriend."

"But that label feels forced," Jacob added. Judging by her nodding, Nessie didn't like it either. The title seemed too overbearing and too little at the same time.

Nessie beamed in excitement. "Yes, exactly!"

"It's too much of a commitment for a fling," Jacob retorted idiotically.

"Fling?" Yikes. He quickly figured out he must have struck a nerve when one of her eyebrows arched, a dark fire burning wickedly in those black pupils.

"Uh-oh."

"Is that what 'us' means to you, Jacob? Just some mindless, meaningless physical fun until you go home in ten days?" she snapped, her face reddened for an entirely reason now.

"Oh, please!" Jacob exclaimed in exasperation, rolling his eyes. "If this were any fun, we wouldn't be having this conversation."

Nessie glared icily at him. "You insensitive mongrel!" she hissed, getting up from her spot on the mattress.

"C'mon, Nessie," Jacob sighed, his seconds of acting rationally forcefully coming to a conclusion. "We're not fooling anybody here. You know we don't belong together. That isn't brand new information. We are just a good waste of time." He shrugged nonchalantly, and shook his head. She didn't have to make things seem more difficult than they actually were.

Her expression of obvious ire seemed to momentarily melt away, transforming into one of a saddened comprehension. "You are absolutely right, Jacob." Yes, he already knew that. "Excuse me. I don't wish to make a fool out of myself by taking up your time any longer."

Damn it. Of course, his feet instinctively followed right behind her trail.

"That's not what I mean," Jacob stated.

"What do you mean then, Jacob?" Renesmee demanded, turning around and planted her hands on her hips. The poor shape-shifter stifled a nervous chuckle. She was kind of sexy when she was irritated at him.

His next set of words came out in a barely audible murmur. "You already know, so. . . Don't make me say it, Nessie."

"Save it," Nessie spoke, raising a patient hand to silence him in a very Lizzie-esque fashion. "I'm out of here."

"What?" he inquired in a splutter. "You can't leave!"

"Watch me!" Renesmee yelled back.

"At least let me give you a ride home!" Jacob exclaimed.

"No, thank you. Don't even bother. Running suits me. Goodbye!" she spat back scathingly.

Like black coal stoking the tall flames of a dangerous fire, Jacob's temper fueled. "Fine! Get out of here!"

"Fine!" Nessie shouted, out the front door and dashed into the wind.

"Fine!"

Sigh. Grunt. Another sigh.

He didn't care. Of course, he cared. He didn't want her to hang around anyway. He needed her. It was a fling. But he wanted it to be so much more. Jacob couldn't seemed to make up his mind.

By the time Jacob figured how to feel and how to act, his clothes were torn into dust and russet fur burst through his pores. The right thing for him to do next was to go after Nessie and get things straightened out. There had to be a way to make her see what he really meant to say. His heart depended on her for the simplest of instincts. Love.

Damn it all to hell! Why couldn't he just tell her the truth?

_Say you'll stay_

_Don't come and go like you do_

_Sway my way, yeah_

_I need to know all about you_

* * *

><p><strong>Now a preview for my new ff idea coming soon, <em>La Creatura<em>:**

It wasn't right. It didn't feel right to suddenly not have his world revolve around this singular, most amazing girl, the child Jacob had known since before her own birth. Without fault, her beautiful, innocent image was burned into his mind—those long, reddish-brown ringlets, that unmistakable porcelain skin. This creature, this grown woman had to be his little Nessie all grown up, but her eyes. . . They weren't that wonderful shade of milk chocolate brown.

They were blue.

Jacob's head turned at the sound of a faint gasp, his confused gaze upon the young Seth Clearwater; he had a that funny look in his eyes. Like a blind man seeing the sun for the first time. He imprinted. On Renesmee.

But the first feeling to flood Jacob's body wasn't primal jealousy or any sort of anger. He was relieved.

Renesmee, this feminine beauty, was nothing but a cold-hearted bitch.


	22. Just the Way I'm Not

**Disclaimer: Nothing belongs to me. Song by All Time Low**

**Author's Note: For those of you who are curious about the release of _La Creatura_, it will be some time in mid- February or early March, but I'll try to post a few preview excerpts here and there for all of you.**

_You're a class case of_

_Foolish, young, and in love_

_But you don't even know what love could do to us_

_We are brash and reckless_

_Made of glass and careless_

_We both break apart the moment we both feel too much_

His heartbeat had begun to pound, accelerating like a tempestuous, irritated thunderstorm, and far from being in a good way. It was more in a way that he had journeyed through this arduous woods once before, as if he had commit every single solitary spruce, oak, and evergreen to the hidden compartments of his memory, but it all remained unfamiliar. All the shapes, shadows, colors, and all the darkness attached made Jacob's insides churned, nauseating him until his body would cough out his heart and soul. Memories of his dreams—his nightmares—flooded out his eyes, overflowing until all he could see was Nessie laying cold and still in his arms.

He quickly learned to hate that feeling, traveling in the dark of the trees' silhouettes, but that didn't really matter at the moment.

What mattered was tracking down that elusive half-human half-vampire nuisance.

But it wasn't simple. Far from it. It never was. The world had a nasty habit of never giving him a break.

Jacob continued to follow Renesmee's intoxicating, sweet apple-blossom aroma, yet it kept evading him—getting diluted by another scent, something that smelt a little bit like pure sunlight and forest air. It wasn't completely horrible, but Jacob's stomach churned nonetheless—out of fear—out of anxiety—out of remembrance of nightmare.

And then, Jacob heard footfalls, similar to that of a prey dashing away from her predator and toward safety, but it was somehow louder, also like a predator charging to her prey. It gave him a bad feeling in his gut; Nessie couldn't be too far away.

Damn it all the hell! Where was she? Couldn't she just be reasonable about this whole thing?

He sighed inwardly in relief when he at last spotted Nessie, but after a split second, that relief was replaced with a dreaded worry, and that worry was replaced with massive anger. A growl emanated from the wolf's rumbling chest, flattening his ears at the sight of a shiny golden woman-deer creature pointing a sharp, dagger-like arrow at the other half-breed, who had herself pressed against the trunk of a tree—frozen in her footprints. A breath hitched in Renesmee's chest, her breasts rising up and falling down in hasty movements, but Jacob wasn't having any of it.

No.

Just no.

No one would harm Nessie while he was around.

Not today.

Not tomorrow.

Nor any other day.

_Not again. . . ! Not again?_

In a spurt of adrenaline, the russet canine bared his sharp, pearly fangs, snarling and barking in warning. Just as she was readying her fingers to release the arrow from its rest, Jacob flung himself into the wind, landing on the stranger creature's back, and ripped his black claws into the soft skin tissue without difficulty, like tearing paper—but the woman-deer shouted out her pain, piercing the silence of the woods and the crows fled from their nests, in her final moments of existence. The task was much simpler than killing a bloodsucker.

Nessie watched the scene play in front of her with an expression of unadulterated terror, petrified as though her soles were rooted to the ground, until the animal was torn into scattered fragments all over the place. Her legs trembled violently, collapsing to her knees on the gravel. When the killing was done, a weary and cautious Jacob sat adjacent to her, whimpering and huffing complainingly for Nessie's attention. More over, he was focused on comforting her, saving Renesmee from her shaken state of mind.

"Oh, Jacob. . ." Nessie cried, tightly hugging her arms around his thick neck. "You saved my life. Thank you. Thank you so much. I was so scared! Thank you, Jacob!"

The wolf gingerly licked her reddened cheek, cleaning the salty tears away, and snuggled his wet nose into her sweet, coppery coils in hopes of cheering her up. She giggled, pecking Jacob on his long snout in effortless affection.

* * *

><p>Eventually, Jacob morphed back into his human form, leading Renesmee back to Billy's house for a cup of piping hot tea. It was to calm her nerves, but the endeavor seemed almost pointless. She was chipper, all things considered, but accepted his offer graciously and gratefully, unlike Bella, who would have fussed and insisted she was all right.<p>

"I'm so sorry, Nessie," the shape-shifter apologized, weaving a hand through her soft, reddish-brown locks to pull them behind the shell of her ear, to better gaze upon her angular features. "This is all my fault."

"No, I overreacted," she replied, shaking her head to and fro. "I'm the one who should be sorry."

"You've got to be kidding me, right? That thing—whatever it was—could have been the death of you!" Jacob argued fervently, kneading his dark eyebrows together as if that would force her to agree with him. _He_ could have been the death of her. "You wouldn't have been out there if it wasn't for me!"

"Jacob," Renesmee exhaled smoothly, fondly patting his boiling wrist and sipped from the red mug, "you risked your life for me today. Thank you."

He wished she would stop saying that right about now.

"Quit thanking me, Nessie. I'm not a hero for putting you in danger to begin with," Jacob quipped.

Nessie rolled her eyes. "You weren't the one pointing an arrow at me, Jacob."

"Just stop, Nessie!" he snapped, balling either fist at his sides.

She didn't know how difficult it was for him. Damn it, Jacob had been scared to death today when, for the fraction of an instant, he truly believed that the arrow would steal Nessie's life—that he could possibly lose her. And to see her so frightened. . .

"You're freaking out because you were afraid." Okay, maybe she did know after all. "That's it, isn't it, Jacob? I'm not going anywhere."

It was the sincerest of promises. Jacob wanted to believe her, especially when Nessie was looking at him with those big, brown puppy-dog eyes; but now that he was contemplating it, maybe all those dreams were trying to warm him of the danger involved if his relationship with Nessie became any more serious.

If their romance blossomed into a full-blown commitment, would their arguments constantly fling her into danger? Would he inevitably lose her anyway? Was it meant to be? Oh, god—even worse. Was he being irrational?

But. . . Nessie was it for him.

Brushing her longs nails across Jacob's forearm, automatically setting him at ease, a surge of serenity pumping through him.

"God, Nessie, I'm sorry. I'm sorry for saying all that crap to you," Jacob apologized once more.

Renesmee set down her beverage on the counter-top, smiling at him warmly. "No. When I asked, I don't even remember what answer I was expecting from you. My mom, Leah, and pretty much everybody else warned me, and I thought I was so certain about what I was getting myself into. Hearing what we really do have, that it will come to an end out loud, was just a sort of wake up call. I'm sorry, Jacob."

That hurt. It hurt, because damn, every time he came close to telling Nessie the truth, something was getting in the way.

"I'm crazy for you, Nessie." _I love you._ "I can't even think straight when I'm around you." _I love you._ "Stupidity just tumbles out of my mouth like vomit." _I love you_. "If I lost you-"

"But you won't," she debated, stroking her fingertips along his five o'clock shadow. "At least not right now. We'll be together as long as you want."

"Listen, instead of being boyfriend and girlfriend, for now can we just be Jacob and Nessie?" the Quileute man inquired, sighing flatly.

"Yeah. I like the sound of that."

Meeting together in a chaste kiss, their lips felt softly for one anothers. It wasn't nearly as close to being equivalent to their blood rushing make out session earlier, but the affects resulted the same way. It was still enough to make Jacob's mouth tingle from the vague, lingering sensation of Nessie's lips. He longed to press his hard body further into hers, feel every stunning and luscious inch of the most beautiful woman in the world.

"Nessie. . ."

"Hmmm?"

"Didn't you feel it—that in some way the universe transitioned into place?" His query was uttered in the softest of whispers, but he was also grinning his best dimpled smile—ever the handsome one. "When we met. . . Didn't you?"

She pursued her lips, nodding once. "Yes."

"You know, everything was much easier when I didn't know your name," Jacob stated matter-of-factually.

There were no strings, no responsibilities, no Bella, no other dumb supernatural conflicts—all that stupid stuff. Why not, just for once, could it be uncomplicated for him?

"Are you willing to take it through the bad times?" Nessie asked, the line of lips turning into a slight pout. She was adorable.

No. Yes. No. Of course. No. Definitely. Maybe. Duh.

The last time Jacob attempted to tough out the supposed bad times, which turned out to be more like World War III in his heart, the same was never quite done for him in return. It was all about Bella and her needs. He was only there to temporarily replace Edward, but Nessie was far different from her flaky mother. He could really be himself around her.

"You make me wanna try again," Jacob admitted to her, albeit in shyness.

The half-human half-vampire started to sing to him in jest, "The first cut is the deepest. Baby, I know the first cut is the deepest."

Jacob could relish in the subtle sounds of Nessie's unforgettable voice, chuckling softly at the nervous, pink lemonade blush painting each cheek.

There were probably a plethora of guys out there that would be better suited for her, but there was no woman that could be adequate for Jacob now that Nessie was in his life. Her shoes were unfulfillable, no doubt, and he wished that he could just tell her the truth of it—that she caused his world to spin on its axis as opposed to upside down, but the words were glued to his tongue.

"So, I wonder what that thing was anyway?" Jacob questioned rhetorically, but her received an answer in spite of it.

"My father says that it's called a golden hind," Nessie said, chewing her nether lip.

"That's not a very original name, naming an animal that just because they have a yellow butt," the Native American remarked with a lighthearted snort.

She giggled at that. "I know."

A light bulb flickered on and off in Jacob's brain, then the circuit burst completely. "Wait a minute, hold on here. Your father knows. _You_ know."

"Well, before our date today, I might have seen another one," Renesmee confessed hesitantly, avoiding direct eye contact.

"What?" Jacob demanded outraged by this news, his vision turning red. "You only thought to tell me now?"

"I didn't want you to worry," Nessie replied guiltily, criss-crossing her arms over her chest and tilted her head to the side.

"Nessie, innocent people could be out there in the woods!" Jacob yelled, roaring like a ferocious lion, and the hybrid stepped back to give him space.

"Jeeze, Jake. Take it down an octave, will you? That's why I told Carlilse and my father," Renesmee explained warily, her sad expression similar that to a child's whenever they were caught breaking a vase. "They went to La Push to inform Sam. Jacob, you should really relax."

"Sam. . ." Jacob sneered snidely, humorlessly laughing, and rolled his eyes. "He'll get the entire pack killed."

"That's not true!" Nessie answered passionately, punctuating her defense with the stamp of a foot. "He'll do his best."

"No. This is a mistake. We have to get out of here," Jacob said, already trying to pull her away. Old habits died hard—that damn wolf pack mentality. It had been such a long time, but the urge to do the right thing overwhelmed him. "Come on."

But Nessie yanked him back. "Seriously, Jacob, calm down. Trust Sam, like you once did all those years ago. He will do the right thing," she promised.

Jacob shook his head. "How can you be so sure?"

She took two strides up to him, so that her naïve-wise irises could study his stubborn ones, and smiled in such a way at Jacob that the rest of the world became a black blue around them as her voice broke through to him like an angel chorus. "Because I have faith in people."

"Blind faith," the skeptical shape-shifter commented.

"Yeah, maybe, but all faith is blind. That doesn't mean it's not as real as nice breeze or shift into place," Nessie reasoned gently.

"You make faith sound like some brand of magic," Jacob retorted, remaining cynical in his long, upheld convictions.

"It is. Miraculous, too. That is, when you finally embrace it."

"I don't know. It's been a really long time." Faith seemed more like a bedtime story parents tell their children in hopes to battle the imaginary monsters away—kid stuff. In truth, faith was the equivalent of asking a grow man to believe in Peter Pan. Impossible.

Renesmee entwined her delicate digits through Jacob's nimble ones. "There's no rush."

Ten days wasn't enough time to share a great love with her. An entire lifetime wasn't even enough.

"Will you live forever?" Jacob asked out of curiosity, his choler falling asleep in her deep ocean of tranquility.

"Yes," Renesmee answered. "Will you?"

"I'm not sure yet." If only she could be completely human, not just half. If only he wasn't head-over-heels, out-of-his-whits in love with her. If only he could finally tell her. She deserved at least that much from him—a love. "There's so much chaos. This is crazy, Nessie!"

"I know," Nessie nodded.

"No. That's just it. You don't know, because I haven't had the guts to tell you yet," Jacob replied, inhaling a shallow breath and then released it. He was quickly becoming impatient with himself.

"Tell me, Jacob," she told him, running her hands through his midnight-black hair as her heartbeat accelerated to a throbbing fault.

He was perspiring from the need burning inside his chest. "Nessie, I-"

Alas, if it were meant to be, his troublesome cellphone wouldn't have intruded on their moment.

Nessie sighed. "You should probably get that."

"Yeah. . ." He flipped the device open and put his mouth to the speaker. "Hello, Leah?"

"_Jacob, is she there_?"

The shaky tone in Leah's tone concerned Jacob. "Yes, why? What is it? What's wrong?"

"_I'm not exactly sure yet, but it's urgent. Alice had a vision of Ren,_" Leah replied, her breath coming out in fast pants, loudly gulping, and then Nessie glanced at the floor.

He didn't understand. "I don't get it. Why would that matter?"

"Jacob," Nessie murmured solemnly, her sweet voice horrifyingly similar to Leah's, and for a minute, the world tumbled from underneath the shape-shifter's feet. "Alice has never seen my future."

_Never seem to please you, no_

_Don't you ever let me go_

_I know your heart is shut, shut, shut_

_Don't you know nothing's gonna change us?_

_So, all because I like you just the way you're aren't_

_And you like me just the way I'm not_


	23. Anywhere But Here

**Disclaimer: Nothing belongs to me.**

_Is this the end of a moment_

_Or just a beautiful unfolding_

_Or a love that will never be or maybe_

_Be everything that I never thought could happen_

_Or ever come to pass and I wonder if maybe_

_Maybe I could be all you ever dreamed_

"_Hey, I thought I'd find you here."_

_Jacob briefly twisted his head around to see the form of his beautiful, young imprint walking toward his position on the cliff, going to sit down next to him. It seemed so backward for Renesmee to come find him when everything was going wrong—well, okay. Perhaps that was putting it too dramatically. Not everything was going wrong, just slightly amiss. Either way, Jacob wasn't all that used to being the one who really needed to talk to someone about the complication of life—or at least, not with Nessie. That was supposed to be different. _

_He was meant to be the person she could run to in times of trouble, the person she automatically could open her heart to when it became to heavy to bear it on her own, the person always ready with a smile and a hug just for her. _

_Not the other way around._

_With her, they could spend the entire night, on into the early hours of a glorious morning, talking about their futures—love, marriage, kids' names—or make a commentary on their favorite movies as she would fling popcorn into his mouth back at the cottage. They would stay up laughing at whatever came to mind—sexual innuendos, puns, the worst pick-up lines. All the while, Jacob and Renesmee were hyper off soda, specifically Dr. Pepper and Pepsi, all but bouncing off the walls. And sometimes, during a long movie, Nessie would cuddle up to Jacob's side and they would take a snooze on the couch. _

_(Of course, that best buddy had recently changed somewhat in the past five months, now that Renesmee was maturing into a young woman—complete with a rebellious nature and a bra. And it was becoming harder and harder not to notice these abrupt changes)._

_But their deepest, best conversations had been shared over their cliff, speaking of their innermost fears, their hopes, and their dreams; and on occasion, Jacob would open up about what his life was like before Nessie was born. _

_How, for weeks after Sarah Black passed away, feigning a bright smile was the most daunting obligation he was forced to face, especially once Rachel and Rebecca high-tailed it out of La Push. How he would make a halfhearted attempt to flirt with a few girls in his middle school, but it was pretty rare when they would give him the time of day due to his shy, flimsy build. How that all changed when he started to become a shape-shifter. How by then, he was over the moon for white pale-faced Bella Swan; how she only ever seemed to want his attention whenever Edward Cullen was mentioned. How bizarre it was to think that maybe not all bloodsuckers were too bad when he was forced to share a tent with Edward. How the flames of a high fire consumed every fiber of his being as vampire venom coursed through his bloodstream. How Carlisle saved his life. How his heart cracked wide when a wedding invitation was found in his mailbox._

_Then, Nessie would rest her head on Jacob's shoulder and reminded him—not that he needed it—that throughout those calamities, there was a purpose waiting to be discovered. _

_Jacob never intended for her to figure out she was the purpose._

_However, more often than not, this cliff was the place Nessie escaped to when being half vampire was too much, when being half human was too little, when she felt that she didn't quite fit in any world, when she just needed to clear her head. Not too long after, Jacob would come along to comfort her; he didn't have to convince her that she belonged in his world. She already knew. Then, the two would engage in an eternal talk—talking about everything, talking about nothing, talking about anything. _

_It was peaceful to look out over the crashing, cobalt waves of the ocean, counting the seagulls as they glided in the silver sky as they made up a tale for the stars. _

_This was their cliff._

"_Hey, isn't that my line?"_

"_Normally, yes," Renesmee replied, a warm smile plastered on her shell-pink lips. "Jacob, we've shared so much with each other, haven't we? You're my best friend."_

_And she was his._

"_I just don't want you to feel forced into anything," Jacob retorted, keenly memorizing how the light wind carried her reddish-brownish hair, lit up with a soft golden tint on the ends of her tendrils. _

_She was too good for him._

"_Forced!" Nessie repeated in disbelief, but laughed at his ridiculous conclusion. "Jacob, you imprinted on me. I could never imagine sharing you with another woman, or you know, losing you to another woman. You're the one who's trapped."_

_He snorted at that. Being trapped entailed cramped cages, rubber walls, steel chains, and iron bars, but with Nessie, it felt more like the widest space in the world—a field of blooming life, trickling waterfalls, fluttering butterflies, and the greenest grass on earth, where he was free to roam, explore, discover, and play all day._

"_Come on, Nessie. It's not like that. You know how I feel," Jacob said, not able to fight the oncoming grin as she leaned her shoulder into his. It seemed as though centuries had passed since he last reveled in the warmth of her smooth skin._

"_Do I?" she inquired, shaking her head back and forth. "You imprinted on me, Jacob, that is all the information I have. That doesn't mean we have to fall in love at the same time, or even at all, but I already have. I'm in love with you."_

_Was this a dream? Was it a nightmare? Was the heaven or hell?_

"_Nessie," Jacob spoke, tasting the syllables of her name in a brand new way, and moved his mouth closer to hers. In a chaste kiss, their lips finally met—briefly, but it was magical nonetheless. "I love you, too." _

_Boy, that felt so good to get off his chest. For so long now, Jacob waited to give Nessie the love in his heart. _

"_Oh, thank God," she giggled in relief. "So, does that mean you're really my Jacob forever?"_

"_Yeah, forever," the shape-shifter Alpha confirmed._

_Forever. _

_A word that transformed Jacob and Nessie's plural futures into a singular future. Their love, their marriage, their kids' names._

"_I love you, Jacob."_

_I love you, too, Nessie."_

_That night, they promised to keep falling in love—with each passing day, to let their relationship blossom into a force to reckon with so dead itself could not rip them away from each other—to see it through the bad times and to take it through the bad times. They were unofficially married, with only the midnight, alabaster moon to be their witness._

* * *

><p>As soon as Renesmee stepped through the front door of her family's home, Bella immediately locked her in a tight hug. Jacob stifled a chuckle. There was something heartwarming about seeing mother and daughter not jump down each others throat for a change.<p>

"Renesmee, are you okay? Are you hurt?" Bella asked, feathering a multitude of kisses over the half-breed's cheeks and forehead.

"Yeah, Mom. I'm fine," Nessie promised, pulling away—not out of frustration, but embarrassment. Jacob couldn't blame her. Parents had a tendency of being overprotective. It was encoded into their DNA.

"What's going on?" he queried in concern, noticing Sam Uley and Edward standing together as if they were old pals.

"There's a threat out there in the forest, unlike anything else," Sam replied. "Every time we saw one, it would disappear in the blink of an eye."

"Sure, sure. That yellow butt thing," Jacob said with a curt nod; Nessie laughed.

"A golden hind," Edward corrected.

"Whatever," Jacob shrugged nonchalantly, rolling his eyes. As if it really mattered what the hell they called that thing. "Nessie and I saw one. It's dead, no worries."

"What! What happened?" Bella snapped, whirling around, away from Nessie, to give Jacob her best intimidating scowl. "What did you do?"

Stepping in between her vampire mother and werewolf beau, Nessie's hand came up to rest over Jacob's scorching hot chest to feel his hammering heartbeat. Warm to the touch, only now realizing how cold he had felt in the past several minutes. She was too amazing.

He grinned gratefully back at her, folding his nimble digits over hers. She must have somehow know that Jacob was going to start blaming himself all over again for their earlier incident, but Nessie didn't hold him responsible.

Who cared if Bella was assuming the worst?

"Um, Mom. . . It was sort of my fault. Jacob and I got into a fight-"

"She ran off," Jacob finished for Nessie, catching on to her apprehensive mood.

"Yeah," Nessie sighed, grimacing slightly as her mother practically had steam fuming out of her ears. "Then, one of the golden hinds jumped out from nowhere and caught me off-guard. I froze, but thankfully Jacob was nearby to save my life."

"Renesmee Carlie Cullen!" Edward scolded lividly, actually wagging his index finger at his daughter. Again, Jacob fought not to laugh. For being vampires, Nessie's parents were the typical sitcom type. "How could you be so irresponsible?"

"I'm sorry," the hybrid apologized, staring down at her shoes.

Bella's chest heaved a long sigh, pursing her lips tightly together in acceptance of the situation. A smile etched the graceful corners of her mouth. "Thank you, Jacob, for your ever-wonderful timing and being there."

And for the briefest of instances, Jacob recognized his old best friend, an old best friend in which he just now realized that he might have missed. Then, his oak brown orbs glanced to Nessie, Bella's daughter. Boy, that was difficult thought to wrap his mind around.

Once upon a time, it was Bella that was the love of his life, with all those long walks on First Beach, taking drives around Forks, repairing motorcycles from the local scrap yard. They were friends, pals, buds, companions. If she would have just given him the chance, Jacob would have walked through Hell and back to prove his love to her. But damn it, he sure enough made that walk into the fire, numerous times in fact, but he hadn't returned until recently—he hadn't begun to heal from the flames until recently.

Nessie.

Jacob was out of his mind in love with Bella's daughter. Nobody could have, or would have, anticipated that outcome; but then again, she was very different from Bella, both in physicality and personality. In a lot of ways, Renesmee was more confident with herself as well as in others, more courageous, spontaneous, and willing to take some risks. Not too mature for him, though. Much like that buried part of Jacob, Nessie was a child at heart.

"Nah, please doesn't thank me," Jacob replied when Nessie leaned her back against his broad chest. "It was my fault she was out there to begin with."

"I gathered as much." _Ouch_. "But you could have stayed where you were. You didn't, though. You went after her." Bella shrugged, being as genuine as a mother could possibly be after her daughter was nearly killed.

Fair enough.

Nessie smiled, hope brightening up her adorable face. "Does that mean you're coming around to the idea of Jacob and I being a couple?"

"Not even a little bit," Bella said. She shook her head, despite the ghost of a smile remaining on her mouth.

Jacob and Renesmee glanced at each other, laughing in unison.

"We tried," he told her. "Bella's just stubborn."

"Anyway," Sam mumbled, awkwardly chuckling for them to once again acknowledge his presence. "I sent Leah, Paul, and Brady to scout the region. Nessie-"

"Oh, not you too, Sam!" Bella exclaimed in a whine. Edward gently wrapped her shoulders from behind, brushing his lips against her mahogany hair.

"Ren," Sam amended upon request, "things are mildly dangerous for you—for all of us now. You should be more careful in the woods."

Her bottom lip caught between her teeth. "Which reminds me, what happened in Alice's vision?"

Edward inwardly swallowed back a lump of any honesty he might have owed to Renesmee. "Nothing you need to worry about right at this moment, sweetheart, but we are taking precautions to ensure your safety."

"Such as?" Nessie inquired, arching a brunette eyebrow.

"Well, honey, it's not safe for you here at the moment," Bella explained in a rather patronizing tone, wearing a thin frown. "There are a number of more hinds that could be hunting you and Jacob, since he did, after all, kill one of them. We have to be prepared for the possibility of them seeking revenge. They might very well attack you again."

The half-human half-vampire planted her wrists on her hips. "I can take care of myself."

"I know that, nudger," Bella responded indulgently, "but you know that we can't take any risks on your life." She affectionately patted Renesmee on the forearm. "You father and I decided that it would be safer if you stay with Charlie for awhile. We called and told us that wouldn't be any trouble at all. In fact, he can't wait to have you over."

"Why Grandpa Charlie?" she asked.

"Whatever this creature is, it's not targeting humans. It's only a fifty-fifty chance, but we're betting they would think to look for you out there in Forks," Sam elucidated in a much too worried tone for Jacob's liking.

There was something else going on here and they had no intention of telling Nessie.

What did Alice see?

"Okay," Renesmee nodded.

Edward stepped closer to his daughter to give her a kiss on the forehead. "Don't fret, sweetheart. It will only be for a little while, until we can figure out what the hinds want."

"Yeah, you're a part of our family, too, and we won't let anything happen to you," Sam promised.

"Thank you, Sam."

The two friends hugged.

"I should get going and get some updates from my pack. See ya later," the Alpha stated, waving goodbye as he turned to exit through the Cullens' front door. Jacob exhaled, not sure whether or not to feel a sense of jealousy. Sam was imprinted to Emily, so it was silly.

Renesmee started swinging her arms back and forth. "Speaking of pack, I should go start doing that."

Edward nervously cleared his throat. "Jacob. . . I know it's a lot to ask for, but Renesmee is the safest when you're around and Charlie does have an extra room."

Cue mindfuck.

Excitement.

Dirty thoughts.

Happiness.

Dirty thoughts.

Surprise.

More dirty thoughts.

Paradise.

Even more dirty thoughts

"Only temporarily, yes," Edward answered, pinching the bridge of his nose.

"Shoot, don't have to ask me twice." A mental wolf whistle echoed through the shape-shifter's mind, trying not to ogle Nessie's ass."

"Please, Jacob, try to restrain your disgusting thoughts. She is still my daughter," Edward pleaded, his golden irises turning pitch-black. "No funny business."

"We're not promising anything," Renesee replied in a sing-song voice, giggling in light of their pleasant predicament.

"Jacob, just for now, go help Renesmee pack upstairs," Bella instructed, gesturing to the staircase.

"Can do!" Jacob exclaimed, mocking a salute with a glowing smile. "Come on, Nessie."

_'Cause you are_

_Beautiful inside_

_So lovely and I _

_Can't see why I'd do anything without you_

_You are_

_And when I'm not with you_

_I know that it's true_

_That I'd rather _

_Be anywhere but here without you_


	24. Fallin' For You

**Disclaimer: Nothing belongs to me. Song by Nick Howard.**

**Special announcement: In a few moments, I will be uploading the prologue and first chapter of my new fic, La Creatura. I hope you check it out! :D**

_I start to list all my favorite things that you do_

_Like the way your smile can light up any room that you choose_

_But I love the way you look at me and I hold my hand_

_The things I couldn't do before_

_When I'm with you, I can_

Jacob and Nessie had gone up to her room, busily folding up and putting away all types of clothes into black suitcases. So far, it had been a grand adventure to see what life Nessie kept concealed in her dresser, especially when he accidentally stumbled upon the underwear drawer.

Personally, the best drawer.

"Hey, I'm in love with this drawer!"

Actually, he was more in love with Nessie, but picturing her wearing tight, flower-patterned bras and matching underwear was a major turn on—him being a guy and all.

Nessie halted her work with her jeans to pay attention to Jake. "Wha—oh!" She blushed a deep red, ducking her cheeks behind her hair.

Jacob waggled his eyebrows at her, smiling a cake-eating grin. "So, you're a cotton panties kind of gal, huh? I like."

"You baboon, get out of there!" Nessie ordered playfully, chucking a sock at his neck. "Jeez, no respect these days!"

He did as he was told, flopping down on the half-breed's mattress. "This is exciting. We're gonna be roomies!"

With a sultry smirk coloring those shell-pink lips, the pixilated hybrid climbed on top of Jacob, straddling her hips over his, and leaned her body gently to bend over his copper-toned one. Immediately, he accepted her offering, parting his lips the sweet, fruity flavors of her most delicious mouth, resting his burning palms atop the subtle, swollen curve of Renesmee's ass, caressing the clothe-covered, nether cheeks. She didn't seem to mind that too much, Jacob figured when her thighs involuntarily bucked around his throbbing length. When her hypnotic scent grew potent, pervading thickly within the room, Jacob pressed their hips further together, and felt his khaki shorts become much too tight as though to cage his erection. The friction could only be described as magical—russet and porcelain skins perspiring in a thin coat of heat and excitement.

_Up and down, side to side, moving all around. _Nessie shivered in delight, slowly rocking their aroused nether regions in a stable rhythm, trying to create a pattern instead of flying off the handle, a musical tremor vibrating through the core of her body. He earned a crazed, hungry moan eliciting out of her, reveling in the pleased sound, as his hard-on attempted to charge straight through his devious, prison-like clothes and wanted to bury himself deeply betwixt her soaking wet walls.

Damn. He had never thirsted for sex this much in his entire life. Jacob's hand glided underneath Nessie's tee shirt, roaming up from her slender stomach to tenderly cup a thick breast through a lace bra—maneuvering devilishly with the supple texture and light weight of it—and inwardly grinned when the half-human half-vampire increased the ferocity of their kiss, their tongues warring for dominance. He felt her nipple pebble against the tip of her index finger, coming to life as the undeniable fragrance of arousal enhanced.

Suddenly, she pulled away, disconnecting their mouths as well as their groins, and went back to packing with a goofy grin plastered on her face. Oh, what she did to him. . . That damn cocktease.

"It's kinda scary. First, we're fighting. Now, you're my guardian angel," Nessie said, sighing softly and tried to fix up her chaotic hair.

Jacob shrugged—being anyone's guardian angel was a daunting notion to live by, even if Nessie was just joking. "Just for a little while." He sat up, mentally talking down his aching boner.

"At least we can have some more fun," Nessie told him, her lips clad in a nefarious smirk.

Damn it. It wasn't hard for Jacob to soon figure out that Nessie must have loved torturing him and his raging hormones. Not that he was complaining. All the same, Jacob stared at her in interest. "What kind of fun did you have in mind?"

Nessie went back to Jacob's side, resting her delicate fingers upon the his hand to him a vision—a vision of her pearly-white teeth biting on the zipper of his shorts, tugging it down painfully, teasingly slow. Jacob stifled an impatient whimper when the images stopped playing through his head, images that were also known as his new favorite porn. There was nothing more enticing, nothing more horrible, nothing more arousing than the idea alone of Renesmee's plump, magenta lips wrapped around the base of his swollen length. And it just wasn't fair that they couldn't do this right now. Hell, the fact that Nessie even contemplated raunchy shit like that blew Jacob's mind—that the virginal Cullen princess knew that blowjobs existed.

Jacob swallowed back a chunk of lust. "Oh. My. God!" he groaned in exclamation, about ready to be sent into cardiac rest. "You naughty girl, that's not very ladylike!"

"Uh-huh." she nodded in agreement, curtsying in jest.

"Nothing to be ashamed of."

Jacob definitely wasn't.

"Maybe you should get some of your stuff from Billy's," she murmured. Nessie gave him a quick peck on the cheek.

"Sure, sure. I'll see you tomorrow. Bye, Nessie."

"Goodnight, Jacob."

* * *

><p>The following morning, Jacob discovered himself standing outside of his father's best friend's house, helping said best friend's granddaughter by holding her hand for moral support as a steady hand knocked thrice on the front door, but when that didn't work after five minutes, he simply rang the doorbell.<p>

Dull sunlight bathed the apple red hue of Renesmee's cheeks, appearing as a beautiful and nervous princess next to a lowly peasant. If only she could somehow see the effect she had over him; that every solitary glance, every solitary movement, and every solitary action revolved around her—Jacob was the planet Earth, bountiful and lush with life, but Nessie was the burning sun, always breathing new strength straight into his soul. Jacob had told Nessie more than a thousand times how he was in love with her—hell, he would be willing enough to let his half-leech drain him dry of all his blood if that would make her happy—just not in so many words. They didn't need the power of the imprint to weave their hearts together. Somehow, Jacob and Nessie were already tied together in a mystifying familiarity.

But then a word, composed of two simple syllables, penetrated the shape-shifter's brain.

_Marriage._

Yep. He'd marry her if he could.

"Jacob!" Charlie exclaimed, a hint of dismay evident in his tone and greeted Jacob with a warm hug. "Hey, how ya been? It's great to see ya! You haven't changed a bit!"

Even though it was great to see Charlie after so long, Jacob couldn't help but be reminded of his own immortality. Over the past eight years, the wrinkles etched in Charlie's face multiplied as his brunette locks were painted with fine, gray edges. How much longer would Charlie spend walking around while his daughter and granddaughter stayed frozen in time?

The shape-shifter mirrored his enthusiasm, reluctantly releasing Nessie's shaking fingers to return Charlie's quick hug. "Charlie, you old geezer! Long time, no see!"

"What are you doing here?" Charlie inquired, gazing between the eight year-old and twenty-four year-old teenagers (which was already a confusing thought in itself). He could tell something was up between them.

"Um, h-h-he's," Nessie stuttered shyly, "with me, Grandpa."

"Oh, really?" A chocolate eyebrow perched itself atop the cop's forehead. "How come?"

"Edward and Bella asked me to watch out for Nessie," Jacob explained, folding his masculine arms over his chest, and watched for the navy-clad police's reaction. He looked somewhat unconvinced.

"Who's Nessie?"

"Yeah, Jacob calls me Nessie," the half-vampire half-human answered, uncertain of her grandfather's comprehension of their exact relationship.

If you could even call it that. . .

"Because she loves the water so much," Jacob added, recalling the night he first saw the Loch Ness half-breed disappear into the indigo ocean below—when he obligated his imagination not to go insane at the wet memory of her.

"Well, I guess that's okay. . ." Chief Swan could see the way Jacob looked at Nessie and the way Nessie looked at Jacob, ". . .as long as you're using protection."

The blood in Renesmee's cheeks bubbled, adorable and pink, and took a small side-step away from Jacob (effectively making it even more blatantly that they were involved). "Oh, we're not-we aren't doing anything like that." Not yet, at least.

"Yeah," Jacob agreed, grimacing in faux disgust. "That'd be too weird."

Charlie shrugged nonchalantly. "Whatever. I guess it's none of my business. Come on in." Finally, he allowed them into his house, up the stairs and down the hallway, and opened the door.

The world toppled in a topsy turvy motion on its axis. And just like that, Jacob was transported back in time, returning through a miserable loop when he was still foolishly in love with a human girl, when he simply paced around Bella's room and wanted so much to tell her the truth. Jacob remembered—the purple walls, the dream catcher hanging on the bed post, and how torn he was from the inside out. He did not miss that part of himself. It dawned him a couple of times that she and Edward must have spent countless nights in each others arms, kissing and God only knows what the heck else.

"Nessie,"—a nickname that suited her well—"you'll be staying in your mom's old room, and Jake, you're just down the hall."

"Cool," Jacob commented.

"Thank you, Granpda, for everything," Nessie said. Jacob studied the vampire-human hybrid, with a heavy heart, as a smile—a smile that had no business being on beautiful face—stretched falsely at the thin corners of her mouth.

Charlie nodded, wrapping her in a warm hug. "Think nothin' of it, kiddo. You know you're my favorite grandkid."

Renesmee rolled her eyes. "Yeah, right. I'm your only grandchild."

He fondly ruffled her auburn swirls of hair. "That only makes you all the more special to me. Welp, anyway, I gotta get down to the station. See ya'll squirts later."

"Bye, Grandpa!" Nessie called after him. "Be safe!"

"Later, Charlie!"

With awfully loud footfalls, Chief Swan exited his humble home, at last leaving the couple to their devices.

Jacob gazed at Renesmee, her milk chocolate eyes wandering all over the confinement as if to soak in the sight. "Wow. Bella's room. This sure takes me back for a spin."

"Great," she replied facetiously, twirling a strand of curly hair round her finger.

"Hey, Ness. What's up?"

"Nothing." The Native American male arched a brow questioningly at her, inaudibly demanding her honesty. "It feels wrong to be here."

"You're right," he agreed, nodding his head. "It feels like I'm intruding."

"Really? Me, too. I just want to get out of here and go home," the hybrid confessed, removing the dream catcher from her mother's bed and played with the brown leather strands as if she were a cat. He could easily see how Nessie was itching to leave, insolently shaking her head to and fro. There was no hiding her discomfort.

"I'm sorry, Nessie," Jacob apologized, ever-empathizing with the young halfling woman. He embraced his arms around her slender stomach, ghosting his lips over her throat.

Nessie laughed—such a genuine sound. "Nah. Don't be. I'm all right. I mean, don't get me wrong. I love Forks—the smell of rain and the woods—but it's a constant reminder of. . . A life I feel like I should have had here. I don't know. It's so confusing. My thoughts are jumbled."

"Then, we have officially been hanging out too much."

"Why do you say that?"

"Because I know exactly what you're talking about."

Freeing herself from Jacob's grasp, Nessie turned around to face him with mischievous simper dancing across on her strawberry mouth. "How about we go exploring?"

Jacob sighed, knitting his eyebrows together in an expression of uncertainty. "I don't think that's such a bright idea."

"Please, Jacob?" Renesmee begged, giving him her best puppy-dog look that was guaranteed to bend his will. "I'm dying to be anywhere but here."

"But the yellow buttocks are still out there and I'm supposed to protect you from them, remember?" What kind of babysitter would he be if he was ready to call it quits after a mere five minutes on the job? Couldn't Nessie understand that? Her life was in danger, for goodness sake. Why tempt fate? "Nessie, we need to be smart about this."

"Well, we will be extremely careful, and we won't even go too far," Nessie promised, chewing on her bottom lip. "Hybrid's honor."

"What did you have in mind?" Jacob inquired ruefully.

"The old Cullen mansion in the forest," Nessie retorted; Jacob rolled his eyes. "After we moved out, Emmet and Jasper wrecked it to pieces. I just want to see what's left of it. That's all. Then, we can get out of there."

"Okay. Fine." He couldn't believe what he was going to do for Nessie—where he was going for Nessie. Damn it all. It was a cold, cruel, wonderful Jacob was in love with her. "Really quick. But shouldn't we get unpacked first?"

"No!" Renesmee shouted, frantically pulling on his wrists. "That can wait! Let's go!"

* * *

><p>And there Jacob stood in the darkest fraction of past, in the broken memory of the Cullen's ancient home. There was wood and dust everywhere. It seemed only the living room managed to survive Gorilla Boy's and Prozac Man's destructive escapades.<p>

"Wow. Now, this is weird."

Nessie shrugged, alit with jubilation. "I suppose Uncle Jasper and Uncle Emmett didn't do such a hot job, after all. Thank goodness, too. This place—this is home," she said, expelling an affectionate breath from her chest. It was her wonderland.

"Man, I remember the day I walked out," Jacob began, shockingly relaxed by the environment. "Your mom was plump and huge and pretty much an eyesore. Blondie and I were bickering over something. Edward started hearing your thoughts and your parents started going over the stupidest baby names." And the next Jacob knew, he was driving away in a Mercedes Guardian. "Oh. No offense, _Renesmee_."

Renesmee sat down on the singular step from a shattered staircase. "Very much taken," she replied sarcastically. "Yeah, I know the whole story, Jacob. No need to regale. My family seriously thought that I would be born with horns and a red tail. You left because of me." Shiny tears glistened in her rich chocolate irises, blaming herself for Jacob's departure.

Jacob sat adjacent to her, grasping tenderly at Nessie's hands. "No." He had always blamed the demon spawn, Bella, and the rest of the Cullens for his problems, but Jacob never once thought to blame all the long-term in his own shitty mistakes, and he was finished with that."I left because I'm stupid."

"Apparently not. The Volturi came for me, to kill me, Jacob, because they thought the same exact thing you did. Irina died. I saw her heard torn from her body, all because of the fact I shouldn't exist. . . I never asked to be born, you know," Nessie confessed sadly, deliberately brushing her knee against Jacob's. "I never want to steal my mother's mortality or make you leave."

The half-man half-wolf chuckled. God, he could just hear himself now. 'Abomination' this and 'monstrosity' that. And here was the so-believed abomination before his very eyes, a beautiful woman with a vivacious personality and good soul."Hey, you shouldn't beat yourself up over this. People are idiots." Unfortunately, he played a part in that category.

"But I always need to be protected, Jacob. You don't understand. Even before I was born, my mom and Rosalie had to keep me safe, then the Volturi came and I was forced to hide behind Leah, and now. . . Nobody else knows how sick I am of constantly being Lois Lane or Lex Luthor. For just a split-second, I want to know what it feels like to be Supergirl or Wonder Woman." Oh, poor Nessie.

Why couldn't she herself through his eyes?

"Nessie, for someone so smart beyond her years, you sure a dumb," he quipped, gently nudging her. "You're the bravest woman I know."

"Oh, yeah? How's that?"

"You're the only woman courageous enough to wanna be with a guy like me," Jacob grinned, lightheartedly pressing their foreheads together. Momentarily, he lost the road of Renesmee's breathtaking mahogany eyes, not caring if he ever made his way back. He had always lost his common sense and heart to this forbidden creature. What would Jacob need with his mind? She could have it, too. There wasn't anything he would change about her.

"I don't think that's true," Nessie replied, at ease as Jacob planted a simple kiss on her cheek.

"Sure it is." Not only was Nessie willing to date Jacob with no official titles, but she could also best him in a slightly erotic sparring match. "Nessie, I won't lie to you. I have known plenty of women," not that any of them were worth knowing, "but not a single one can compare to you."

"Oh, Jacob." She smiled, and he kept on falling in love with her. "I wish you had stayed here."

"That doesn't matter anymore, Nessie. Neither of us can wallow in the past. We're here now, and I can honestly say that I'm glad we're getting to know each other. That's what counts."

He leaned his lips closer to Nessie's, but she seemed to catch a glimpse of something. "Hold on. Wait a minute, Jacob." She arose from her spot, walking over to the fireplace, and grabbed a book-type object out of the dust and dirt.

"What is it?"

"I don't know." Nessie blew off some of the grime. "It's a notebook—Edward Masen's."

"Your dad's?" Jacob guessed.

"No, Jacob," Renesmee answered. "This journal once belonged to my grandfather."

_I'm fallin' for you_

_I hope you're fallin' for me_

_And I am fallin' so hard that I am head over heels_

_I hope you touch down before my feet hit the ground_

_'Cause I'm fallin' for you_

_And I hope you're fallin' for me_


	25. Accidentally in Love

**Disclaimer: Nothing belongs to me. Song by the Counting Crows. **

**A/N: The third half consists of some yummy Jacob exploration, as well as some lime. I feel Jacob and Nessie should get to know each other physically (beyond just making out all the time) before the inevitable love-making. If that doesn't bother you in any remote way or something, make sure to R&R!**

_So I said I'm a snowball running_

_Running down into a spring that's coming_

_All this love_

_Melting under blue skies melting out_

_Sunlight shimmering love_

Jacob sat on the steps still, clapping his palms together as Renesmee paced back and forth with Edward Masen's old, secret journal. He had the strongest convictions that she was freaking adorable, shaking her head at herself. There was something that was making her erratically nervous, whether it was simply an object that once belonged to her deceased grandfather or standing in this damn place spooked her, or perhaps a combination of both.

Either way, Jacob had to smile at her nail-biting disposition, as opposed to her characteristic calm and collective attitude.

"So, are you going to read it?" Jacob queried, counting Nessie's long strides back and forth.

She glanced at him, grimacing in uncertainty. "No. I don't think I should."

"Why not?"

"I don't know," the half-breed answered with a shrug, stopping in place to face Jacob directly. "It almost seems intrusive. Someone—my own grandfather—documented his innermost thoughts on all these pages. His hopes, his dreams, his fears. My eyes have no right to read and to know. That's too much like cheating."

"First of all, the man is dead," Jacob pointed out bluntly, demonstrating his argument by pulling back on his index finger.

"And it's best to respect the dead," Nessie said. "I can't just go snooping around through his stuff." Although, it couldn't technically fall into the snooping category since the journal was tossed into an old fireplace. "Edward could have had some huge secrets."

"Okay." Jacob rolled his eyes, slanting his mouth in a half of a frown. "Second of all, unless he was mass murderer, none of his secrets could be that devastating. Not to mention Pretty Boy Cullen is your padre, I doubt anything could be the slightest bit interesting."

In fact, he'd be willing to be bet that Edward Masen Sr.'s diary was one, giant snooze-fest.

The half-human half-vampire girl arched an eyebrow. "Sure. . ."

"And third of all, your father cheats all the time," Jacob reminded her. Having once been a part of a pack of eight brains, mind-reading wasn't all that it was cracked up to be, but it had its perks every once in a while. "What's stopping you?"

"Yeah, but my dad never had a choice, and I'm not him," Renesmee replied, expelling a flat exhale from her system. "There are things in here that I might want to discover about Edward or Elizabeth. Are they really worth the risk?"

Jacob got up, all but hearing Nessie's perplexed soul beckon his own closer, and cupped the magenta hue of her silky cheeks. His smile for her was sunny—warm and bright.

"Nessie, are you afraid of getting to know your granddad?"

"No, not exactly." Nessie pursed her lips, but continued looking into Jacob's black-brown orbs, and the urge to be honest overwhelmed her. She just needed to come out with it."Grandpa Charlie is the only one of my biological grandparents that I've ever gotten the chance to know. Renee was never really an option either. She doesn't even know I exist, and I've sort of wondered about her from time to time. Would she like me? Would she tell me that I'm mostly similar to my mother or my father? Would she hug me?" The hybrid contorted her expression in disbelief that she would ever find out. "My family. There is just so much I don't know about them. I don't want to do that to myself with another set of grandparents."

"Hey, at least you'll always have Doc and Esme," Jacob said. "Blood may be thicker than water, but water is a lot more pure. Plus, you'd probably just chug that blood anyway."

"Touche," Nessie nodded, smiling at his joke. "I love Carlisle and Esme, but biologically speaking, we're nothing alike."

Jacob shrugged, grabbing the notebook from Nessie. "Just hand it over to me then, Nessie. You might change your mind one of these days."

"Thank you." She rested her tired head against Jacob's chest as he simultaneously encircled his protective arms around her lower torso. "Jacob?"

It somehow seemed satisfying that Nessie could seek out her comfort with him—in him—almost feeling the light, quick thumps of her sensitive heartbeat.

_Bo-bome. Bo-bome. Bome, bome._

He was flattered, enraptured in the warmth radiating off her body.

"Yeah?" the shape-shifter murmured, the scent of pine cones and vanilla shampoo filling his nostrils as Renesmee's reddish-brown ringlets tickled his chin.

"You're the best," she murmured, tracing her plump lips on the Native American male's russet Adam's apple and made his skin vaguely weep for more of her wonderful touch.

"Sure, sure," he mocked, chortling huskily. "You're just saying that to get into my pants."

Nessie giggled, humming a soft lullaby along his neck. "Jacob Black, that is entirely too presumptuous, actionable, laughable, and probably plausible."

"Lady, you have my full consent!" Jacob exclaimed, partly joking and partly anxious to see if she was serious.

His body was hers to do whatever the hell she wanted.

"I know." Renesmee teasingly swatted Jacob over the elbow.

"I know you know." _I'm in love with you._

"I know you know I know."

"I know you know I know you know." _Why can't you figure out that I'm still in love with you?_

"I know you kn-"

Jacob cut Renesmee off mid-sentence in the sweetest kiss, one that would leave Romeo and Juliet in the dust, grazing his teeth over her bottom lip. His entire world was blazing beautifully bright, captivated in the fruity flavors on her tongue. It was hard to believe that Nessie had only kissed two guys in her whole life—although, Jacob now wished that he was her first and last—because she was so damn talented—an expert. Nessie could take direction, but better yet, she knew how to give direction. Her kisses were so fierce, yet so gentle.

Then, of course, she was deliciously tasty. Jacob longed to have his tongue tied to hers all the time, as well as every inch of her body.

"Nessie, you're the best," Jacob whispered, staring hypnotized into Renesmee's milk chocolate irises where the universe held absolutely still on its axis, where nothing in the world mattered except them in this instance.

"Come on, you mushy pup, let's get lost." For now, they were done with this house.

* * *

><p>Renesmee felt around the capitalized, carved letters in the tall oak tree, smiling affectionately as Jacob leaned against the same tree and also studied to the initials. N.C.B., with a sloppy heart around it. Some fellow, love-sick hikers must have done this. Needless to say, it was cute.<p>

"I used to know every inch of this forest when I was a kid," Nessie told Jacob with a sharp sigh. "Leah and I played out here all the time. Since day one, she has been like my older sister. Now it feels like I've never been here at all."

"Yeah," the shape-shifter agreed. "I feel like I should know this place by heart."

"I don't even remember this carving. It's been too long," Nessie stated, memorizing the shapes of the letters with her fingertips.

"N.C.B?"

"Narnia calls bull," Nessie quipped, giggling.

"NASCAR beasts."

"Nick Carter bites."

Jacob gulped. "Nessie Carlie Black. . ." That had a nice ring to it. He considered proposing to Nessie right then and there, reciting the phrase in his head like a high school girl.

"Yeah, right," the hybrid joked, batting her raven eyelashes at him in irony. "Like I would every marry you."

"_Please_." He nudged her on the side, winking nefariously. "Like I'd ever want to marry you. Sugar, please! You need to get over yourself."

"Hmmm. . ." Renesmee tapped her chin in thought, chewing the inside of her mouth. She sat on the nearest stump, her doe orbs glistening curiously. "Jacob, do you ever think, in another life, we would be this close if you had stayed?"

"Who knows?" Jacob shrugged, completely nonchalant. This was here and now. The past didn't matter anymore. "I'm here now, Nessie, with you."

Nessie rolled her eyes. "Yeah, for now." She arose from her seat, emitting a gentle huff—not out of annoyance, but confusion. "I know what I'm about to say is really ridiculous, but you're standing right here in front of me. I can see you, I can feel you, but I still miss you. It doesn't make any sense."

For the hundredth time, he should have told Nessie that he was in love with. He should have promised that he had no intention of leaving her behind ever again, not for some crap job and crap apartment Seattle. He should have told her every moment since they met that he would love her for the rest of his life—no imprint would change that, but Christ, he definitely wanted to imprint on Nessie.

"That's not stupid," Jacob responded, lacing his russet digits through her porcelain ones. He relished in the flower petal texture of Nessie's smooth hand as he twiddled her thin knuckles, "and it does make sense. Just be patient with, Nessie. All of this is still brand new for me and I'm getting used to being in a real relationship. I'll come around eventually. I promise you."

"Okay," she nodded, smiling assuredly. "I trust you, Jacob."

Damn. That trust meant the world to him, too.

* * *

><p>"Home, sweet home!" Renesmee exclaimed, shutting the front door behind them. "Grandpa! Are you home yet?" No answer. "I guess not."<p>

"Finally!" Jacob sighed exaggeratedly, laying down Edward Masen's journal on the coffee table.

"And you thought we'd get in trouble," she jibed in jest.

"Whatever."

"Oh! The day isn't over yet, Jacob. I have the most fantastic idea."

"Oh, crap." Frankly, Jacob was a smidgen exhausted with Nessie's vampire-human shenanigans. "Not another one."

"Don't whine." Nessie poked Jacob on his side. "This is an idea you should really enjoy."

Jacob quirked an eyebrow, feigning intrigue. "What is it?"

"Follow me, Jake. We're going to have that fun I promised you."

Nessie led him into the guest room, devilishly away from the living room with wicked proceedings blatantly on her mind. As their hands wound together, images and emotions coursed through Jacob's veins—images of lying flat on his back, along with an aroused Nessie enticing him to climax—emotions of wanting to simply surrender their desire to each other. It was exciting to really see just how much Nessie truly wanted Jacob. Feeling her deep lust was one of the most exuberant experiences he had ever gone through.

Something he could get lost in.

"Go lie down on the bed, Jacob," Nessie timidly ordered, turning the locking mechanism on the door so there wouldn't be any unwanted disruptions. "Oh, and take off your shirt."

"What ideas are swimming around in that noggin of yours?" the shape-shifter inquired, following her instructions automatically, with and open heart and an erect member.

"A lot," she said, smirking at Jacob as if she was a seductress trained in the art of romance. Maybe she was. "Just relax, Jacob. I want to do this with you."

She was nervous. Why was she nervous? What was she planning?

"Nessie, you know that you don't have to do anything for me," Jacob reminded her softly, carefully observing the apprehensive contours of her bashful face, flushing apple red. "You know that, don't you? I'm not after you for a piece of ass."

The young half-breed giggled, her cheeks almost ready to burn off. "I know, Jacob, but I do want to do this for the both of us. Please?"

His dark chocolate orbs softened greatly, thawing along with his heart, and pulled Renesmee on to the bed adjacent from him. There was a different life behind her rich, Hershey's eyes, a life filled with pure wonder—his life—their life, one they could create together some day. Jacob pondered on whether or not she knew about the elusive jade ring encircling the black pupil. She was so much more than beautiful. And it was the first time in his twenty-four years of life that he didn't things could get any better—merely being with Nessie was the greatest, best thing to ever happen to him—but she was about to accept that challenge.

"Do whatever you want with me, Nessie, but don't push yourself. If you're not ready, I wouldn't ever judge you or turn you away," he promised. Jacob could own up to being an asshole, but even he wasn't that big of an asshole. "You. . . You've become my best friend."

She set his heart on fire, the sparks flickering to and fro.

"Yeah, well. . . I want to be more than just your best friend."

Renesmee's strawberry lips caressed Jacob's sun-kissed skin, nipping lightly on his neck where he had a sensitive spot. One finger tugged at the dark waistband, hinting at what she wanted—and she wanted Jacob to strip. Jacob instinctively learned to love this instigator attitude of hers, so did mini Jake. He obliged willingly, scooting out of his shorts as fast as possible, lying naked in all his Native American glory.

She moved further downward, peppering feathery kisses all over his broad, muscular chest. Nothing was really happening yet, but his body was animate and alive—he felt like a high king, or rather an extremely horny teenager having sex for the first time. Nessie wrapped her full lips around Jacob's mahogany aureola, her graceful tongue sharply flickering side to side as the skin puckered with exhilaration underneath her vigorous attention. Jesus, it felt so damn good—something that had never been done to him before. Nessie tweaked his other nipple, rolling the tan bud between her middle and ring fingers, using him as her most special, favorite toy.

Small goosebumps formed where Renesmee's sweet breath rushed against him, causing him to shutter in a hungry fervor; yet his temperature boiled as blood flooded in a descending motion. The thirst for release seared into the pit of his stomach, paralyzed by hers and his stimulation.

"Nessie," Jacob groaned, his body glistening in a weightless sheen of sweat. She was trying to drive him up a wall, into insanity.

His long, hot fingers became deeply buried in the coppery roots of her hair of the girl-woman's hair, not to pull on, just an activity to keep his hands busy. Renesmee was much too good at this, the shape-shifter mused as guttural whimper threatened to erupt from his exhausted vocal chords. The subtle sensation of Nessie's mouth venturing down to Jacob's smooth, hard stomach—getting to know the plateau surfaces of his eight abs—was indescribable, like floating on warm bathwater. Jacob was void of all hate, daydreaming about his love for Nessie.

She kissed the left V contour of his pelvis, soaking in his masculine fragrance into her soul.

"You're up already," Nessie murmured, her tone accented in passion. "You didn't even make me work for it."

Jacob smirked sheepishly. "What can I say? It's just the way you turn me on." Majorly.

"I'm flattered," Nessie giggled, but her confidence momentarily subsided when she got a thorough eyeful of Jacob's proud erection, russet and tall, sort of like the rest of him. She gulped, placing a tentative hand on the head, earning a hiss from poor Jacob, who was fighting back pleas of mercy that would rush her, so he willed himself to remain silent, except for the evident panting of his heart. "My, my," she uttered in genuine astonishment. Her thumb twirled around the tip, studiously gazing upon the crystal clear substance leaking out. "So big, so hot." Jacob gave Nessie one, strained nod, resting his head back on a pillow and shut his eyes. "It's all right, Jacob. I have no clue what the heck I'm doing, and I'll need your guidance. Tell me what you need."

"N-No!" Jacob coughed. "Go at your own pace. Just please do _something_!"

The young woman nodded, wrapping her mouth around the very top and experimentally lapped up the precum. She moaned—actually freaking moaned, taking pleasure in the taste of the sticky fluid while the aroma Nessie's own desire penetrated the air. _That was sexy_.

Slowly, Renesmee began stroking her mouth over Jacob's long staff—in and out, up and down—only able to fit so much in due to his glorious ten inches (a startling size if there was one) and his proportional girth. As she licked the underside of the Quileute's thickest vein, her tunneled grasp twisted up and down with the four inches left. Her teeth scraped over the head, sucking harder and taking him in further.

Meanwhile, Jacob was completely blissed out of his mind, grunting carnally as Nessie kept getting closer and closer to taking in his entire manhood. Sheer heat pulsated through him, causing his rod to twitch in a delighted response when the half-human half-vampire mewled around him, and sent delectable vibrations to travel throughout his body. Involuntarily—possibly a slight bit on instinct too—his hips bucked commandingly, and finally his tall erection hit the back of her throat. _Holy shit! Yes!_

For a moment, Jacob remained motionless, fearing that he might have hurt her; but instead, when Nessie didn't gag, cough, or even pull back, she continued to keep sucking off his member. She hummed once more, his cock gently trembling in sweet, sweet pleasure.

"Oh, God!" he panted, a growl rumbling through his chest. This woman was a straight up pro. Damn it, he loved this girl. It was inevitable now, climbing to the height of his desire and flew off into the stratosphere, where the sun always shone. "N-Nessie, you gotta-you gotta move now! I'm gonna-"

But his warning was far too late; his proof of climax shot down her throat and she took all of it. Damn. Jacob was impressed.

"So, how was that?" Renesmee inquired shyly as if he hadn't just experienced the best blowjob ever.

"Um. . ." Jacob mumbled, reopening his eyes. "Orgasmic."

"Really?" She was incredulous with him, blushing deep red, and climbed on the bed with Jacob. It slightly bothered him that Nessie was fully clothed while she still had her own arousal to worry about.

"Yep," he retorted as Nessie smugly simpered. "What about you?"

Nessie squeezed her thighs tightly together, liquid soaking through his panties. "Oh! Jacob, you don't have to!"

Jacob grinned. "But I want to. I want to return the favor." His tan pink lips found her cheek. "Do you want me to, Nessie? I won't push if you're uncomfortable with it."

"Would I seem like a total hussy if I said that wasn't the reason?" Nessie asked, laying down to stare into Jacob's eyes. Quite enchantingly, her thousands of auburn coils splayed across the white-cotton pillowcase.

He shook his head. "No. What is it?"

"Well, I don't want my grandfather to find out what we're doing. Locking a door only prolongs the inevitable. That will only make him curious," Nessie explained embarrassed. "I don't want to risk either of us getting killed, or me not finishing on time."

Jacob screwed his face, his expression conveying her point. "You're right. That would definitely stab the mood in the heart, but we have another whole forty-five minutes to think about."

Nessie pursed her lips, "How can I argue with that?"

"Then, sit back and relax, baby."

_Well, baby, I surrender to the _

_Strawberry ice cream_

_Never ever ever will this love_

_Well, I didn't mean to do it_

_But there's no escaping your love_

_These lines of lightning mean_

_We're never alone, never alone_

_No, no_

* * *

><p><strong>AN: On a different note, if you're still wondering about Alice's vision and Edward Masen's journal, all will soon be revealed in a due amount of time. **


	26. Who Knew?

**Disclaimer: Nothing belongs to me. Song by P!nk.**

_If someone said three years from now_

_You'd be long gone_

_I'd stand up and punch them out_

_'Cause they're all wrong_

_I know better_

_'Cause you said forever_

_And ever_

"Jacob, are you sure you want to do this?"

"What? Lick your pussy?" Did he really have to be so straightforward?

"Um, yeah."

"Then, definitely yes, Nessie. I can't wait to get started."

"Really?"

"Clearly, you don't know how sexy you are. You smell great, too. Maybe they should just serve you at a fast food joint."

Blushing a bright strawberry red, Nessie forcefully swallowed back a lump of bubbling lust as she laid back on the green-sheeted mattress and tried to get comfortable, but being underneath Jacob's intense forest brown irises was partly petrifying and partly relaxing—an explosive chemical combination. It was alarmingly simple with her Jacob's devilishly handsome stare, as he studied every solitary centimeter of Nessie's body—the most nefarious of imaginings spinning and tumbling around in his mind. She knew that much.

Only dressed in a light pink silk bra and matching cotton panties, she felt like the most important woman in the universe, her skin blazing in a porcelain glow. But it was still nerve-wracking to think that this would be the very first time a man would ever feel the excited fibers of her virgin flesh.

Jacob Black.

A young man—a wolf—that spent the past eight years of his life avoiding the fact she existed. Now, here he was—with her—in love with her. His kind, the very foundation of his mighty ancestors insisted on the hatred, to slay the Cold Ones—the enemies. It's what he was born to do. Yet, Nessie knew that he wouldn't. He couldn't hurt her.

Renesmee Cullen.

A young woman—a rare hybrid—that was supposed to be born a cold, heartless monster, an aberration, but she was the opposite. Her love was proof that she wasn't an abomination to be terminated. Not by the wolf pack. She upset the balance of her very own nature, as well as Jacob's. Or perhaps they were put on this earth for different reasons beyond the realm of violence.

Weren't they supposed to hate each other?

Daughter of the former love of his life, daughter of the vampire that won in a messed up love triangle. He should have torn her to shreds as some sick revenge, he should have ripped her limb from limb for being his natural enemy, or at the very least he shouldn't want to help protect her. For that matter, they should have shared a mutual hatred for each other. But they didn't. Not anymore.

They were somehow connected—by an inexplicable power—stronger than a regular imprint, stronger than her bond to Leah Clearwater, stronger than a singular life. Two strangers, one from a world made of blood and the other from a world made of fur, were tied together by a timeless love.

Renesmee gulped audibly, pursing her cerise lips tightly together as Jacob slid his body slowly between her legs, until he was kneeling before her. The locomotive rhythm in her heart nearly burst, to think that he would. . . He would lick her. Jacob brushed his attentive lips over her inner thigh; Nessie's stomach tightened restlessly. She wanted him. She may have even needed him—to be with him, like rain and sun.

Forever.

Not just like this. More of him.

Three words.

"Um," Jacob stammered, grinning wolfishly, "have you ever touched yourself, Nessie? You know, masturbation. . ."

Truthfully, until she met him, there was never really a need.

"I. . ." The half-breed blushed profusely, a color that would put a tomato to shame, as the heat rushed through her core. Was this a trick question? Was he going to tell Seth and make fun of her later? No, Jacob wouldn't do that. "Once," she finally confessed, her expression bashful, "but I didn't come or anything. It was more for self-examination."

Unfortunately, the best she had been able to accomplish was arousing herself, recalling the blinding smile of the stranger from the cafe, but the fear of being caught or judged never left.

The shape-shifter nodded, his rough-touch fingers massaging the back of her knees. "That's okay, Nessie. Was there anything you remember liking?" His index finger trailed up between the moist lips of Nessie's southern area, stopping to press down on the clit, earning a small whine of agitated desire. "I mean, is there anything you want me to do?"

Was he really expecting her to talk? How unfair!

"No, not r-really," she answered honestly with a nervous stutter, feeling her voice quiver. Masturbation was a ridiculous concept to muse about, let alone seriously attempt the action once again. Her mind couldn't stay focused, everything was too distracting. That, and it was difficult to stay relaxed to remain aroused. "Sexually, I haven't done a lot."

"And yet you can give an outstanding blowjob, Miss V-Card. Like a pro. The best, if I'm honest. I've never come before while getting some head, " Jacob complimented with a dashing wink, tenderly cupping Renesmee's womanhood through her drowning panties. "Can I take these off?"

She nearly climaxed at the request.

"Yes, Jacob." Her Jacob. "If you want to."

Nessie knew for a fact that Jacob had many women, ones that knew what the hell they were doing and probably could have bested her in arousing him, at pleasing his every sexual whim and need. He was a supremely gorgeous man—a great smile, an enrapturing pair of brown eyes, intriguing copper skin, muscles bulging out of nearly every body part, and was a masterful kisser—what woman wouldn't want a night along with him?

But this wasn't about him, though her brain might have been more at ease if it was, this was about 'returning the favor.' A payback. An obligation.

There must have been some part of him didn't really want to go through with this. Maybe he was even disgusted. After all, she was still a half-vampire.

"Forget about what I want. Tell me what you want, Nessie."

"I want you to touch me, Jacob. Please?"

"Anything you want, Nessie," he vowed—an empty one, she knew. She wanted his heart; she wanted him to stay; she wanted to dream in his arms for the rest of their lives. If he wasn't more careful, she probably would have dragged him down a long aisle, too. "Anything," he repeated, bordering dangerous territory with her. In her mind, all she needed now was a fancy dress. His warm mouth crashed against her inner thigh once again. "I'm gonna need you to open your legs wider. You need to trust me." With her body. With her soul. With her heart. With her life. "I wouldn't ever hurt you for the world."

"I do," the hybrid said. "I trust you, Jacob." Of course she did.

Renesmee then obliged, adjusting her position on the mattress and spread her legs further apart to give Jacob better access of what she had to offer—giving him enough room to work. Slipping of her panties ever-so slowly, the would-be Alpha male's studious black-brown eyes widened the slightest bit at the sight in front of him, and actually licked his lips—hungrily—like a carnivorous mountain lion, staring in a starving haze. Down on her womanhood was a small, thin patch of deep auburn hair—not a bush, just the right amount of trimmed grooming that wouldn't make him feel uncomfortable.

Or Nessie hoped so at least.

When she showered this morning, it wasn't on her list of the things to do—to get Jacob off as well as herself.

"I hope you like it," she uttered idiotically, as if she were talking about a mere object and not a private region of her body.

"Jeez, I wish you could read my mind, Nessie, or maybe I would show you if I had your power. To me, you're already perfection. In the Dictionary, I swear your photograph is under the word beautiful," Jacob spoke reassuringly. "No other woman comes close to you."

"Oh, Jacob," Renesmee exhaled in affection, his name the most flavorful of syllables known to her heart. Jacob was the only one for her. There would never be another soul that would complete hers so well. She wanted to beg Jacob to stay with her forever, never go away again. This could be their eternity. "Jacob. . ."

"Just relax, Nessie," Jacob whispered, smiling warmly. "Try to enjoy this. If we need to stop, then we'll stop."

Stop? They haven't even started yet and already she inwardly pleaded for more.

Being too tauntingly slow, with a pace like a tortoise, Jacob's tongue at last dipped into Nessie's pink slit, tracing her bottom lips to effectively sample the euphoric flavors streaming from her sex. Groaning in anticipation, Nessie's teeth embedded themselves between the taste buds of her own tongue. She would force herself not to yell, for fear of the neighbors overhearing or Jacob happening to hush her. That would take her out of the moment.

"Don't do that," Jacob instructed compassionately. "You're always safe with me. I want to hear you."

Well, when he put it like that. . .

Nessie nodded, her heart on the verge of exploding from an ultimate love, when Jacob's talented tongue carefully licked at her swollen button—suckling gently at the juice flowing out of her warm pool of desire. She mewled softly, transforming into an oasis for Jacob, and become even wetter as his tongue danced, tasted, twirled, and teased at the plump bundle of nerves. He grazed his lips over Renesmee's round rim.

And then, the real magic happened.

Jacob sped up his pace, burying his tongue deep inside the half-human half-vampire teenager—licking and lapping all of her sweet fluids, like honey to the bumble bee. Again, Nessie emitted a sound of sheer desire, her hands gripping frantically at the sheets. It was quickly becoming hard and harder not to scratch into the thin material as Jacob explored the tight cavern of Nessie's secret place.

Her stomach heaved concave up and down breaths, mentally pleading for more attention. Automatically, as though he might have been able to read her mind, Jacob slowly stuck his middle finger the flushed walls of Renesmee's slick entrance, examining the resistance.

"Oh, my god!" Nessie whimpered, partially from the sharp pain and partially from the unforgotten lust. The sensation of something being inside of her was bizarre; however, it was not altogether unwanted. Her center craved for even more, bucking her hips and swirling around Jacob's finger. "Jacob! Don't stop!"

"Shit, Nessie! God, you're so tight!" Jacob exclaimed, his breathing strangely heavy.

Then, he inserted his index finger into her opening, circling his fingers around and searched determinedly for Nessie's spongy button. When Jacob finally found it, Nessie let him know by letting out an intense, blissful scream. He continued to poke, jab, and caress Renesmee's g-spot in a hook motion. She squealed in blatant delight, her body all but convulsing as Jacob's two long fingers kept disappearing in and out of her pussy.

The colors of the room converged—a hallelujah trembled through her core—her body dangling over the inevitable precipice of orgasm. Pounding his digits against her harder and faster—a motion so splendid and so spectacular that her brain couldn't keep up—that she could feel herself ready to respond, the undeniable heat building up in her stomach. So, so, so very close. And then, Jacob twisted his fingers and prodded mercilessly at Nessie's sweet spot.

"You can do it, Nessie. Come for me," Jacob encouraged, his other hand pressing at the center of her clit, and rubbed it to and fro.

Her body immediately obliged to Jacob's command, a gush of extra fluid flourished out of her aroused pussy—expelling an echoing moan and hissed the syllables of his name. "Jacob!" she shouted, every fiber of her being whirling in a starlit paradise. "Jacob, yes!" Her walls contracted countless times, lost somewhere in the stratosphere. But he refused to cease until Renesmee climbed down from the high, and replaced his fingers with his tongue. "Jacob. . . !"

Jacob pushed his tongue between Nessie's damp slit, taking in everything—every ounce of her sweet nectar. When he was finished, Jacob gazed up at Nessie.

"How was that for your first orgasm, Cullen?" the shape-shifter asked, grinning smugly.

"Amazing." Beautiful. Indescribable. What direction was north again? In fact, Nessie couldn't wait to do it again soon. "Thank you," Nessie murmured lazily. "We should get dressed. Grandpa Charlie will be home soon." Stupid priorities.

Jacob let out a tiny groan. "Probably. I have to go take a shower right now," he stated, gesturing to his situation downstairs, huffing and puffing. "Wanna join me?"

The corners of Renesmee's mouth turned upward in a cunning simper, as she sat up on the bed, and arched a questioning eyebrow. Why couldn't he just say it? "Nice try, Jake."

His dark chocolate orbs raked over the half-breed's creamy white skin. "Can't blame a guy for trying. That's for sure."

* * *

><p><em>Depression seized the morning sunlight, a thunderstorm raging outside—the banging and thrashing of the purplish-gray sky, the onslaught of never ending cold rain falling onto the hard ground, and the constant waiting and never knowing. There was a silence amongst the forest, however, as the squirrels collected nuts, as the sparrows built themselves sturdy nests, as the leaves fluttered to the ground from the rain's attack, as the wolves hid under trees to keep dry from the rain, as Nessie Black remained within her cozy prison—though it was once her home with Jacob. <em>

_It was now or never._

_Somewhere out there, Faethra was waiting to killer either Jacob or Nessie, armed with her bows and arrows—her blood, their poison. A few months ago, Jacob had brutally killed a fellow golden hind alone; and sadly made Faethra the last of her kind. She deemed Jacob a ruthless murderer and promised to teach him a lesson in mercy. Faethra was stronger than any shape-shifter, faster than any bloodsucker, and more strategic than the Volturi. Hunting traps were laid out across the forest, all meant for Jacob. For the sake of revenge, not justice. A game of cat and mouse. Already, the eleven year-old Claire Young had lost her life along with Sam, Brady, Kim, and Jared. But the chaos would soon halt if the Alpha's mate ever decided to willingly meet with the last hind and sacrifice her life for Jacob's. No more lives needed to be ended._

_That very morning, Jacob found Renesmee in the kitchen, mindlessly stirring up a mug of freshly brewed hot coffee, and gently added a bluish-white powder—probably a weird sugar. Despite the despair in the air, Nessie was happily humming a sweet tune for her husband, a good change from her annoyed mood. It seemed she was back to her normal self, finally content with never getting to leave their newlywed home._

"_Hey, Nessie," he whispered, wrapping his arms around her slender waist from behind, and trailed his lips against the back of her neck. "Good morning."_

"_Good morning, honey," Renesmee replied chipperly, kissing Jacob on the cheek. "Did you sleep well?"_

"_Yeah-huh. Better than I have in a long time."_

"_That's good to hear."_

"_How about you?"_

"_I was in your arms—what does that tell you?" Her milk chocolate orbs twinkled._

"_Even though it's your mom's birthday?"_

_Nessie sighed, rolling her eyes. "I know that, Jacob. There is no need to remind me."_

"_Sorry," Jacob mumbled apologetically. "I meant-"_

"_That's okay," Nessie interrupted, not up for an explanation. Too much was on her mind already. "I'm a little bummed I won't be able to celebrate with Mom today, but I can cope," she replied with a nonchalant shrug. It didn't matter anyway. Not today. "Being under house arrest is a lousy way of shopping for a gift."_

_Jacob sat at the end of the dining table as Nessie handed him the green mug. "I promise you, Nessie, we will get Faethra soon. I won't let our friends die in vain."_

_But when? A hundred years from now? She couldn't stay cooped up inside forever like a caged zoo animal, living in a constant fear—that during one of Jacob's afternoon patrols, there was always a chance she would never seem him again. "Jacob, I love you. There is nothing in this great world more true for me, but how much longer will this take? Until Faethra gets tired of waiting and busts open the front door? You know it's not in my nature to always be some damsel in distress locked in a tower."_

"_What do you want me to do, Nessie?" Jacob inquired solemnly, furrowing his eyebrows. "Let Faethra kill me? Kill you? I can't. So, just drop it and let it go." He was using the Alpha tone with her, a defense that never worked for Nessie. She wasn't one of his followers, she was his partner damn it! He took several large gulps of coffee. "There isn't a life for me if you're not in it."_

"_Listen to me, Jacob. I am not a porcelain doll you can keep from breaking. This is madness. Someone needs to take action against Faethra," Renesmee said, grimacing at him._

_Jacob made a disgusted face—not at her—but at the taste of the liquid. "Hey, did you put something different in this coffee? It tastes kinda funky."_

"_No, it's regular coffee. Don't change the subject." The half-human half-vampire climbed in Jacob's lap, encircling her arms around his thick neck, putting a hand to his cheek—not to show him pictures, just to touch. Nessie wanted him close to her and never wanted to let him go. A flat breath sunk into her chest, her warm brown eyes suddenly glazed over in tears. "Jacob, you have to know that I do love you. That will never change, no matter where I am. And I promise to never leave you."_

"_I love you, too, Nessie. If I didn't, I wouldn't be this crazy," Jacob said, yawning exhaustively. Their mouths connected feverishly, soaking in each others light as much as they could. Power and energy passed and traded into their hearts momentarily, when their tongues crashed hungrily. As Nessie felt his determination and courage surge through her, she knew that would be all she needed this last time. "Nessie. . ." he murmured tiredly, struggling to keep his eyes open._

"_I know." She kissed his lips. "I love you." She kissed his forehead. "I love you." She kissed his right cheek. "I love you." She kissed his left cheek. "I love you."_

"_What's happening? Nessie, wha. . .?" The question withered away on his lips, unable to use enough energy to even speak. He could only look at his wife as she stood up, her hands clasped together._

"_I'm sorry, Jacob. I'm so sorry. Please, find it in your heart to forgive me. Forgive me."_

_That last kiss I'll cherish_

_Until we meet again_

_And time makes it harder_

_I wish I could remember_

_But I keep your memory_

_You visit me in my sleep_

_My darling_

_Who knew?_


	27. She is the Sunlight

**Disclaimer: Nothing belongs to me. Song by Trading Yesterday.**

_If all the flowers faded away_

_If all the storm clouds decided to stay_

_Then you find me_

_Each hour the same_

_She is tomorrow_

_And I am today_

_Dear Jacob,_

_If you are reading this right now, I probably have gone to take care of Faethra by myself, which is something that I know you would do for me if the situation was reversed. I would disapprove and stop you from doing this, and you would stop me. That's why I felt the need to trick you. There was no other way. We're living like rats in a trap, and it's time to break free. I have been planning this course of action for weeks now, and of course, I've deliberated over this a hundred time what this could mean for my life. _

_How could I not? I'm not stupid, but your life means so much more to me. _

_However, I promise you that I do have every intention of returning to your warm arms in hopes you will forgive my deviousness, because this isn't meant to cause you any pain. _

_I really don't want you to hate me. I just want to save us and our families. I am doing all of this for you, Jacob. _

_You must know that there isn't anything in this world I wouldn't do for you. _

_My Jacob, I would die for you. I would survive for you. It is you that has always been my heart and my soul, and I belong to you just as your belong to me. I swear to you that I will find a way to make it back to you. I promise._

_In the case I become stunted on my mission home, I pray that you might understand my choices. If I am gone, then I know Faethra is as well._

_Please don't get upset. Please don't get angry. Please don't shed a tear. Please don't do anything too reckless. Jacob, you have promised me more than a thousand times that you would always be there for me, and you have always been there every single time exactly when I needed you. Now let me be here for you. Let me in and maybe you'll realize that we are never truly separated. _

_Death can't permanently wound us. The only thing death can do to our love is delay for a short while, but not forever. We are the ones who own forever. Whatever may happen today, my love for you—my best friend, my lover, my husband, my entire world—remains immortal. Nothing will ever change that._

_This isn't your fault. If you must blame someone, you are more than welcome to blame me._

_Goodbye, my Jacob, but not forever. Only for now. I'm so sorry, Jacob. Please don't hate me for this._

_With All My Love,_

_Nessie_

* * *

><p><em>Edward's expression contorted into one of imploding pain, his whole universe came crashing down instantly upon the sight of his worst nightmare coming to life. His only daughter was being cradled in Jacob's tan arms, her body ever-motionless and caked in dirt—skin paled to blue tint, covered in purple bruises, eyes closed, and blood stilled. She was broken in nearly every bone of her silent corpse, never crying from the tremendous pain and never breathing—again. Faethra was dead, too, but Nessie would never get the opportunity to celebrate her lone victory. <em>

_Not for as long as the clouds were shaded in misery and deceit, not for as long as the silver sky raged in endless agony, not for as long as they lived._

"_Oh, god!" Edward spoke shakily, his voice strangled with sorrow. His ceased, unbeating heart was heavy as if the Himalayas had descended upon his chest and he would be forced to carry this weight for the rest of eternity. "Oh, Nessie! No, no, no, no! Please don't let this be true! Nessie! Renesmee!" But it was no use. She wouldn't listen to them—she can't listen to them. His fingers stroked through her abundant tendrils of autumn auburn, and looked up at Jacob. "H-How could this happen?" _

_How could Jacob have let this happen? _

_Jacob shook his head, his face already drowning in a mess of tears. His thoughts were jumbled, a million conflicting images all playing out, sounds echoing in the void corners of his mind—Nessie's sweet smile, Nessie's angelic laugh, Nessie's bronze tresses of hair, Nessie's bare porcelain skin, Nessie's red blush, Nessie's comforting scent, Nessie's milk chocolate eyes—now just fading memories. The images were so strong, but so weak. _

_But Edward knew. The evidence was too clear. He just didn't want to believe it. That his daughter wouldn't have forever. He wanted to be human and for this to be a bad dream._

"_Edward," Bella murmured, her tone choking back a sob, but this was a pain that couldn't be soothed. "She. . ."_

"_I know, Bella," Edward retorted, attempting to take Renesmee's frozen body away from Jacob's burning grasp, but he carefully pulled her tighter against his chest, and refused to release her. "Give me my daughter, Jacob." Her arm fell from its resting place, her icy palm grazing over Edward's chest, as if to keep him away from her soul mate, protecting him one last time._

_But Jacob barely managed a halfhearted response, glancing up toward his father in-law with dead forest irises, a dark combination of fury and despair brewing in his soul. A tremor shook through his weakened body, the awful hurt was the only thing to keep him breathing. Nessie needed to stay close. He didn't want to fight Edward, but the calm before the storm was at its breaking point. As long as he held Nessie, he would be semi-stable._

"_You aren't the only one who lost someone, Jacob!" Bella seethed, baring her pearly, razor-sharp teeth._

"_I lost the world," was his cold reply._

* * *

><p>At last, Jacob emerged from the guest room, fresh and new from a well-deserved steamy shower. He was clean—well, his body was anyway, not really his mind. His mind was still picturing Nessie pressed up against the shower wall with his mouth traveling all over her creamy, nude body. Her reddish-brown curls darkened from the hot moisture, her rich Hershey's eyes smoldering with lust back at him, and the liquid droplets trickling down the cherry blush of her perfectly round breasts.<p>

Yum.

Jacob found Nessie sitting on the couch, boredly flipping through a thousand different channels.

She looked up; immediately the most vibrant smile lit up her beautiful face. "Hey there, super stud. How was that shower?"

"Why don't you tell me? You were there with me the whole time, babe," the shape-shifter retorted, adding a flirtatious wink.

Renesmee laid back on the sofa, her smoky milk chocolate orbs staring at Jacob in blatant desire; he was suddenly very sad that they were wearing clothes. "Tell me about it, baby."

_Baby?_ Jacob inwardly snorted.

"You're trying to tease me," Jacob remarked, the life in his jeans slowly beginning to strain.

"Uh-huh," came her nefarious reply, chewing her bottom lip. "Is it working?"

Definitely yes.

"More than you know," he chuckled, tackling the little she-demon on the couch. His hands tickled up and down her sides, squeaks of impish delight escaping her vocal chords.

"All talk is cheap," Nessie giggled uncontrollably, squirming around beneath his massive frame, and pursed her lips.

"Shut up and let me show you."

"You better."

A challenge. A challenge Jacob was more than willing to accept. Jacob's tongue furiously attacked Nessie's, a fiery passion swelling up deep from within the hammering of his chest like never before—save every single time he had spent with her. She was too delicious for her own good. The wolf spirit quite agreed, too, its needs desiring to finally be sated. It felt like a cosmic, phenomenal force to have this creature's delectable, flawless body pressed hungrily into his, her legs wrapped around his thick waist as their two mingling pieces of pink flesh collided in a feral starvation for one another. He wanted to sob from the growing need to dive into the half-human half-vampire's moistening core, while he smelt the girl-woman's aroused aroma pervading the room.

But Jacob didn't want to fuck her. Oh, no. His feelings—_sigh_—his love for Nessie was classier than wanting to romp around into a motel room. No. He wanted to make love to her.

He felt her shudder against him harshly when Jacob's hard-on stabbed into the pool of Nessie's body. She liked that. This time, with a very deliberate thrust of his hips into hers, her face disconnected from Jacob's to let out a soft moan, as he latched his mouth onto her neck.

Oh, shit!

"Jacob Black!" Oh, double shit! "Get your grubby hands off of my granddaughter!" Chief Swan bellowed ferociously.

Thinking better than to lose his life then and there, Jacob obligingly climbed off Nessie and stood at least three feet away from her. That would be a safe enough distance. But damn it if it wasn't one hell of a turn on to see Renesmee's copper locks messed up and her lips flushed as she tried to get a handle on her breathing. And then, Jacob remembered the taste of her pussy—sooooo good. Charlie may have not been a mind reader, but Jacob's thoughts were as transparent as glass.

Just as Charlie was about to attack, Nessie stepped in between the two men to protect Jacob from yet another family member.

Freaking Bella. Freaking Charlie. Like father, like daughter.

"Hey, hey, hey! Grandpa, relax!"

"I thought Jacob was just your babysitter!" Charlie exclaimed heatedly. "If you two are gonna—not on my couch!"

Nessie shook her head to and fro, grimacing slightly. "Granpda, please. Jacob is my-Jacob is my—my Jacob." Her Jacob? "We don't have any exact titles, but we're close."

Yeah. More than friends, less than lovers. Perfect description. That didn't make Jacob sound like a horny creep at all.

"Yes, I can see that," Charlie growled angrily.

"Just don't jump to any conclusions. Jacob and I care about each other a lot," Renesmee said, smiling calmly.

"He had better care about you," the cop grumbled, his nostrils flaring and chose to glower in Jacob's direction.

Man, if looks could kill, Jacob would be a cold puddle of gooey wolf.

"He does, Grandpa," Nessie assured.

It was kind of cute how she wanted to make her grandfather understand the bigger picture—if there was one. Jacob couldn't help it, he still had his doubts about this whole ordeal; Jacob still had fragments of a life back in Seattle, but really, who the hell was he kidding? He loved being home, he was ready to give it all up to come back permanently. For Nessie. It couldn't really be considered a sacrifice anyway.

"Nessie, thanks, but I'm a grown man. I can speak for myself," Jacob stated, turning part of his attention toward Charlie. He wouldn't be afraid to this to Nessie's mother or father, nor would he fear her grandfather. His relationship with Nessie wouldn't be kept a secret, not from anyone. He wasn't ashamed. This next part would eventually would have to be said, "Charlie, you're best friends with my dads, you've known me my whole life. I am not a hormonal, typical guy after Nessie for a piece of ass. Not that she has a bad one or anything. I think it's a pretty sexy view when I can get it."

The half-breed glanced over her shoulder, staring at Jacob as if he was a mental patient. Babbling wasn't fun for him either.

"Kid, get to the point," Charlie said, furrowing his brunette eyebrows. "You're making me uncomfortable."

"I care about your granddaughter, Charlie. A lot. I wouldn't be here if I didn't. She means more to be than anybody knows," Jacob elaborated, no longer looking at the graying, old man; his dark eyes instinctively fell upon Nessie. His world.

"Good," Charlie nodded, "because if you hurt her-"

Nessie laughed, moving her one arm to wrap around his shoulders in a grateful side hug while her free hand rested upon Charlie's—using her gift. "Granpda, I love you. Thank you so much for being a loving grandfather who sticks up for his granddaughter, but I don't need it. If Jacob hurts me in any way, his ass is mine to kick from here to Hell."

"Gee, thanks," the Quileute mumbled.

She shot him a wink, but kept her attention on Charlie. "I know we're not supposed to be together, according to rest of the universe, but our relationship is a no pressure zone. We're having fun while we can."

Charlie mock-glared down at her. "All right. Just not too much fun under my roof."

"That's a mighty big promise to make," Jacob contemplated mistakenly aloud.

How much fun was exactly too much fun?

"But you have our word," Nessie promised.

"Really?" Charlied asked.

Nessie nudged Jacob in the stomach. "Sure, sure," he replied, crossing his fingers behind his back.

* * *

><p>"Can I ask you a question?"<p>

"Wasn't that one just now?"

"Don't be a smart ass, Baby Cullen."

The hybrid giggled teasingly to herself, breaking the last bits of spaghetti noodles in half and tossed them into the boiling water. "I'm only kidding, Jacob. You can ask me anything."

Jacob sighed, leaning against the refrigerator door as he crossed his arms over his chest. "How can you be so sure about me? About us?" the shape-shifter inquired, staring at the mesmerizing curve of Nessie's calves. Yeah. Even the woman's calves were alluring.

"I don't know," Nessie murmured, turning around to face him, but a smirk was etched across her strawberry lips. "I just am. Whenever I see you, it's like. . . the butterflies in my stomach multiply instead of going away. I get a song stuck in my head, and it reminds me of you. And somehow, I just know that I'm meant to feel this way. I felt this," her fingers laced through his, an overpowering warmth washing over him, "when we first met."

"I know what you mean, but I don't think I'm as sure as you are." Damn, damn, damn. That was fore sure. Jacob envied Nessie for that—she knew who she was, she knew was she wanted, but Jacob didn't have a clue about his life. Who was this girl and who decided that they should be together?

"Men never are," Nessie playfully answered.

"Wow, Nessie," Jacob retorted with a snicker. "I didn't know you were a sexist jerk."

"Oh, mercy me!" She feigned regret, placing a hand over her chest. "I suppose the truth had to eventually come out."

"It sure did." Jacob grinned. "So, I'm your Jacob, huh?"

"Mhmm."

"Does that make you my Nessie?"

"Mhmm."

Good. His Nessie, her Jacob. He quite liked the sound of that.

"Can I kiss you?"

"Mhmm."

Jacob's hands found the gentle curves of her hips, setting Renesmee down on the counter top, and pecked her lips innocently. But naturally, a mere peck wouldn't satisfy him. He deepened their kiss just a little bit, breathing in the sugary-sweet taste of her tongue into his lungs, as if she were his oxygen. With her, Jacob was a peace. Calm.

"Nessie," he sighed, "I l-"

[Cue inevitable interruption.]

"I guess water isn't the only thing boiling in here," Charlie said, walking into the kitchen. "Excuse me for ruining the moment. Sorry." Jacob grimaced, getting the distinct impression Charlie wasn't sorry at all.

"Not at all," Jacob coughed, brushing his warm thumb over the high peak of Nessie's reddening cheekbone. "I was. . . Nessie had an eyelash, and I was getting it for her."

Charlie frowned. "Yeah, right."

The Native American gently plucked a black lash from the rim."See? Make a wish, Nessie."

"What do I need a wish for?" Nessie inquired genuinely, arching an eyebrow.

He shrugged nonchalantly. "I don't know, for the sake of it."

"Fine," she complied, blowing the eyelash away.

"How sweet," Charlie commented sarcastically, rolling his eyes.

"Yeah," Jacob agreed, "she kinda is."

"Oh, don't make me sick before dinner. Speaking of which, what are we eating?" Charlie asked, glancing at the pots and pans. "The food of love."

"If the food of love is spaghetti and meatballs, then yes," Jacob retorted, chortling.

"Hey. If it worked for Lady and the Tramp, it works for me," Nessie said, as Jacob snaked an arm around her shoulder. Now, they were just messing around with Charlie a little bit.

"Find another room to be adorable in before I really do get sick," Charlie grumbled, wrinkling his expression in disgust.

_If loving her is heartache for me_

_If holding her means that I have to bleed_

_Then I am the martyr_

_And love is to blame_

_She is the healing_

_And I am the pain_


	28. I'm Gonna Love You

**Disclaimer: Nothing belong to me. Song by Jennifer Love Hewitt.**

**A/N: Sorry that this update is so late, guys. School has been really keeping me busy. I'm putting Le Creatura on hiatus until June, so I can focus on this one. Anywho, R&R!**

_It didn't start this way_

_It happened just one day_

_You smiled at me _

_And I saw you differently_

_Now, I would tremble just to be_

_Apart of you as we_

_Begin a life that's sure to never end_

Later on that very same evening, Nessie suggested that they sneak down to the basement after her grandfather went off to his bedroom for the remainder of the night, which Jacob definitely didn't mind—at all.

As she led him down the short staircase, Jacob continued to stare down at the creamy, swollen cheeks of Nessie's ass in a pair of small, flannel boxers. The view was enough to get his brain distracted, setting a goal to eventually get a naked perspective of that sexy ass, which he wasn't properly paying attention when Nessie's right foot slipped off the bottom step. In an immediate reaction, Jacob held out both arms to catch the usually graceful half-breed and fell down on his own butt—_Thud! Thud!_—when Nessie plomped down in his lap.

"Woo!" she giggled, glancing over her shoulder to smile appreciatively at him.

"Hey, you did that on purpose," Jacob pointed out, grinning back at her.

The half-human half-vampire girl nodded playfully; subsequently, Jacob nearly went into cardiac arrest. "I just wanted to see if you would catch me. But not only did you do that, you actually fell with me. Thank you," she said, her milk chocolate orbs widening in mock astonishment, and kissed the dimple of Jacob's cheek.

"Like I had a choice," Jacob muttered, rolling his eyes and gave her a slanted simper. "What else would I do?"

Nessie shrugged nonchalantly. "You could have stepped inside."

And let her bruise her ass? Never.

"True," he admitted jokingly, not meaning it in the slightest. There was no chance in hell he would ever let her fall—or rather, let her fall alone, "but I wasn't complaining. Just a matter of fact." Then, one of his large hands wrapped around her waist and squeezed her closer to himself. "I like getting to hold you right next to me. There's probably nothing better."

Jacob didn't really like to cuddle, but Nessie was naturally the exception. In fact, she was exception to a lot of rules he once set up for himself. It was an unspoken manifesto—he would _never ever_ even want to kiss a vampire, and while Nessie wasn't a full vampire, she still counted. But he kissed her all the time now, so that regulation went out the window. He would never have anything to do with Edward Cullen or Bella for as long as he lived; and as it turned out, Nessie was undeniably their offspring. Truly, Jacob loved life in all its sense of odd irony.

Oh, yeah. And he loved her.

Both stood up from the stairs, and flopped down on the comfy couch to snuggle closer to one another. Renesmee rested her head upon Jacob's shoulder, and yet he was the only the one absolutely calm. Her presence was the equivalent of sticking his exhausted feet into a cool pool on a much-too-hot summer's day, or the soft raindrops tapping on the window that would lull him to sleep. He loved being with her, he loved her.

With the sweet fragrance of French vanilla rolling of Nessie's glorious copper springs, Jacob felt similar to a tranquilized bear.

"You're too awesome," Nessie laughed, the sweetest sound to his ears.

"I know," he replied, his tone laced with cunning, and winked. "You're pretty wonderful yourself."

Shaking her head, Nessie copied his wink. "I know."

"Sneaking down to the basement, huh?" Jacob teased, wriggling his dark eyebrows right at her. "I don't know. Seems pretty sketchy to me, like we're gonna have some smelly sex. Tell me again, why are we down here?"

"Because Charlie is asleep and the basement is soundproof," the half-human half-vampire explained, exhaling sweetly. It was true. Charlie had gone straight off to bed, grumbling about eating so much in his old age, while Jacob and Nessie watched some movies for awhile.

"How did you find that out?" the shape-shifter questioned, arching an inquisitive eyebrow at her.

"I'd rather not say," was Renesmee's retort, rendering Jacob even more perplexed and intrigued.

"So, what's wrong with sleeping in Bella's room?"

"I think you just answered your own question."

"Touche."

Nessie shrugged lazily, her sweet raspberry lips jutting out into a sympathetic-invoking pout. Instinctively, one of his long thumbs came to brush against the concealed dimple of her right cheek and caressed the smooth, alabaster skin. She managed a miniature simper.

"I don't feel one hundred percent comfortable invading memories that were never meant to be mine," Renesmee said.

"That's strange, Nessie," Jacob uttered slightly kiddingly, and nudged her elbow. "You told me that you used to visit my room all the time. What makes Bella's any different?" There was a particular answer he anticipated, but his proud ears wanted to hear her say it.

"My parents spent nights up in there, too. Probably hundreds. Talking, kissing, whatever. Sometimes, when I see how happy my parents are, I wonder if they would be better off if I didn't exist. Without me. They would always have their precious, coveted intimate time. I would never matter to them, because I'm not around. Don't get me wrong. I know that they love me, but in their world—the vampire world—I just don't fit in. I'm permanently out of place," Nessie elaborated, ever the human in on a vampire's lifestyle. "But in your world, I'm always. . . I think I belong. You're where I belong."

Which made sense, because she did. She belonged in his world, and in some ways, Jacob knew that he belonged in hers. When Jacob and Renesmee first met, before he knew what and who she really was, things between them were easygoing—no prejudices, no preconceived assumptions. Just them. As they were supposed to be. Two strangers inexplicably compelled to know one another. There was always that familiar feeling that he knew in a life before, too, where the worlds were connected. Not two worlds coming together, but one world. Just one.

"Everyone feels like a misfit sometimes," Jacob retorted, draping an arm over shoulders. "Hell, your mom felt like that and her the solution she came up with was becoming relatives with the undead."

"Yeah, but she was meant for vampire life," Nessie countered, rolling her eyes in blatant jealousy. "My mom is a super vampire. Super smart, super graceful, super beautiful, and super perfect. I'm living in her shadow." A complaint. One Jacob couldn't fault her for. Most little girls wanted to aspired to be exactly like their mother when they reached adulthood, but most teenage girls struggled for their own identity. Then, Nessie shook her head at herself. "Perhaps I'm stupid for being insecure."

"No, you're not. You want my opinion?" Jacob asked.

"Sure, sure." It was kind of cute how she copied his favorite phrase.

"I used to think your mom was the ditsiest, best thing to ever happen to me," Jacob started, grinning in nostalgia. Bella was his girl best friend, after all. "Shy, klutzy, never really capable of seeing beyond her own pain, but she was a really good person," when it suited her, "Compassionate, fun to hang around with, unintentionally hilarious. She was just a girl that I thought was my nearly perfect match. Bella was my world," he concluded, suddenly lost in the smog of his memories. All those long hours in the garage—talking over life, fixing up their bikes, joking around with each other as he tried to console her after Edward's temporary departure.

The half-human half-vampire huffed a little bit, furrowing her eyes. "Yeah, I get it. You two were best friends."

Although. . .

"To be honest, I can't remember why I was damn drawn to Bella. It was years ago now, but in retrospect, I was a dunce to believe her and I really belonged together." And he should have never wanted to be more than just friends with Bella, he should have never pressure into that damn kiss, he should have been patient for the real thing. God, he was so delusional back then. "Maybe it was supposed to be you all along."

"Do you really think so?" Nessie questioned, playfully fluttering her black eyelashes for him.

Jacob chuckled, nodding as though the sentiment was the mot obvious thing in the world. "Yes, I do. Nessie, I don't need an imprint to tell me how I feel about you, that what we have here is real. You're not Bella, and I don't ever want you to be. Forget Bella. Who's Bella?" he quipped. "You're my universe," Jacob sincerely confessed, his dark chocolate irises shone vibrantly—lovingly.

"Oh, Jacob! And you're mine!" she exclaimed enthusiastically, moving atop him to straddle Jacob's waist.

"And just for the record, Bella may be beautiful. It's kind of insinuated in her name," the Native American admitted, albeit, in much reluctance. Everyone remembered how attractive Bella had been when she was still a human, and being a vampire hadn't exactly meant she was ugly. Smelly, but not ugly. Yet, still Bella's extreme beauty had never once burned in like sparks of electricity in his veins, in the best of ways. Only Nessie had that affect on him. She couldn't hold a candle to Nessie. "But you, Nessie, have that kind of beauty that takes my breath away."

"You know, I've always been told that you can never say the right things at the right time," Renesmee informed him matter-of-factually, tapping the tip of Jacob's nose with her pinky finger. "How come you're so different with me?"

A natural reaction.

Instinct.

Love.

"Because you're different, Nessie, or I'm different. When I'm with you, I'm not afraid to be the person I wanna be or the person I actually am. A man, but not the asshole everybody expects of gets to see," Jacob rambled, laughing nervously at himself as the hint of a smirk tugged at the corners of Nessie's mouth. "I'm not making any sense, am I?"

He couldn't help but smile himself.

"Actually," Nessie began gently, sheepishly running her fingernails along Jacob's chin in a soft tickling sensation, "you're making perfect sense to me."

"That's what's so scary," Jacob grinned. His aloud thoughts were barely coherent to himself, why should they make any sense to Nessie?

"Scary. . . and exciting!" Nessie verbalized in a magical stupor, dazed in a wonder.

"Agreed," the shape-shifter chortled.

"Well, the Jacob I know is fabulous. My Jacob," Nessie murmured affectionately.

"My Nessie. . ."

Nessie crushed her lips to Jacob's in a possessive kiss, as he flipped their positions on the couch and pressed her body comfortably against his. He felt desire build in his secret regions, travel through his excited bloodstream like an electric charge, trembling in his marrow. His palms burned and steamed against Renesmee's flat stomach, his tongue dominantly devouring the sweet, fruity flavors of the most invigorating mouth in the universe. Was this what Charlie had interrupted earlier? He needed her with every fiber of his being—prepared for an act so safely dangerous to his heart, and he just wanted to disappear into her soul. Jacob wanted Nessie impossibly closer. His body begged for more of Nessie, almost ready to cry.

"J-J-Jacob," Renesmee stammered in shaky breaths, sounding frightened, and gently pushed him back a little bit. Her face flushed cerise, her heart all but hammering out of her chest—a testament to the bodily side-effect of Jacob's touch upon her. In turn, Jacob inwardly beamed with pride. "Hold on. Stop. We can't."

His aroused mood transformed to concern. "What's wrong?"

The half-breed giggled, embarrassed as they sat up together. "Your blood," she emphasized her point by wrapping a hand around her throat, "is far too tempting."

"It's all right," he told her.

She rolled her eyes. "You can't be serious, Jacob."

"I am," Jacob retorted instantly, turning up an eyebrow. Although, to be perfectly fair, Jacob could hardly believe what he was saying himself. A half-bloodsucker? Leeching off his vital blood? Damn. But this was Nessie, and that was fucking sexy as hell. "I want you to bite me." And lucky for him, the wolf didn't seem to protest that fantasy.

"No."

"Yes."

"No."

"Yes."

"No."

"Just do it, Nessie."

"No."

"Why?"

"Because."

"What are you so scared of?"

"I don't want to hurt you."

"You won't."

"Are you sure?"

"Positive."

"Okay," Renesmee finally agreed, setting Jacob back and climbing on top of him.

And suddenly, Jacob's heart thundered nervously in readied anticipation. Maybe it was the way Nessie's smoldering milk chocolate fixation gazed at him in a fervent, predatory manner; maybe it was how her creamy thighs tightly straddled his yearning hips, forever teasing him with the hottest proximity; or maybe it was how much he wanted to share everything, even his blood, with her. But either way, all the blood in his body was quickly roaming down to his aching manhood, and caused it to be almost to heavy to tolerate.

After what seemed like four hundred years, that damned she-devil leaned down and pressed their chests together. She peppered chaste kisses along the the base of his adam's apple, nuzzling her curious nose against the fiery, copper skin that could only belong to Jacob. A thousand goosebumps arose from him, as lustful tremors coursed rapidly throughout his body. Wolves weren't supposed to want this—getting their blood sucked—but this was far too taboo not to somehow be turned on by.

Then, Nessie gulped and withdrew her hot mouth from him.

"What's the hold up?" Jacob inquired impatiently. He didn't want to pressure Nessie into anything, but now she was teasing him—that mean girl. He was riled up, the wolf ready to blow the house in, but she refused to play fair.

"I'm sorry," she earnestly apologized, but Jacob wasn't exactly mad at her either. "I know we both want this, but I really am struggling not to kill you," was her sinful confession to him. It saddened him to see her ashamed over her thirst, for what she was. "I would never forgive myself if I. . ."

"I trust you," Jacob said, purposely repeating Nessie's statement from earlier that same day.

Nessie nodded and expelled a long sigh. This was it. Once again, her plump lips ghosted over his throat, her warm breath lightly tickling his russet skin. And she licked, wisely testing the waters first, yet it made Jacob's erection stand at full attention. Slowly, those pearly-white teeth sank gingerly into Jacob's flesh, cutting into like a spongy cake. There was an initial pain, a dull sting that hummed around his veins, which soon subsided into something much more bizarre. Much more awesome. Pleasure.

_Gulp, gulp, gulp._

Jacob proudly listened to Nessie's multiple sounds of satisfaction and gratification- the groans and the gulps and the gasps. She was eager, sucking and feeding from him like a starved animal. Jacob's blood seeped out from his neck and into Nessie's mouth, and it felt heavenly. Like paradise, the way tight knots bunched up in his stomach—in a constant orgasm. Jacob mentally swore. He was somewhere between having a heart attack and spontaneously combusting with strong life at the same time, tired from lust and hyper from love. His body surged with non-stop, everlasting energy. His mind was no longer on Earth, but was flying off a million miles high in the stratosphere where dusk and dawn converged, along where lightning and calm met.

This, Nessie sucking on his blood, was arousing—to both of them, as the hybrid's scent thickened around him. Still, Jacob was already going lightheaded, his heartbeat slowing, but he didn't mind it in the slightest. If Nessie didn't stop, this would have been the best way to die.

Alas, she stopped, much to Jacob's disappointment. "That's it, Jake. I'm done."

Jacob shook his head in blatant disapproval. "That was fucking incredible! Come on! Do it again, Nessie!"

"No, Jacob," Nessie replied solemnly, scooting to the opposite end of the couch.

"What? Why?" Jacob demanded playfully.

The halfling woman-girl furrowed an eyebrow. "As good as your blood is to me, I would rather keep you alive."

"You would?" he queried in complaint.

"I would."

"Darn it."

_Because I'm gonna love you_

_For the rest of my life_

_I'm holding you save here_

_In this heart of mine_

_I can't live without you_

_Because my soul would die_

_Now I'm telling the truth_

_I'll spend the rest of my life_

_Loving you_


	29. Running Around in My Dreams

**Disclaimer: Nothing belongs to me. Song by Tyrone Wells.**

_It was one of those moments_

_When everything changes_

_She was climbing out of a Chevrolet_

_On the passenger side_

_Must've been staring_

_'Cause when I caught her eye_

_It seemed I was looking at her_

_For all of my life_

_He shouldn't have been envious of an inanimate object—a straw, of all things. But he was. Horribly jealous of a freaking straw—it might have been ridiculous of him, but at the moment, he just didn't care. As though to taunt him, the youngest Cullen all but gift-wrapped her enticing, fruit-colored lips around her neon green straw, lightly sucking up the pink beverage into her mouth. In consequence, Jacob then became jealous of Nessie's milkshake._

_Jacob felt the rhythm of his heart gallop at full speed, and observed the mesmerizing shape of the corners of Nessie's cunning smirk—how they lifted in such a way that Jacob couldn't think straight, that made him love her more, that caused him to have an insatiable yearn to kiss her. Just kiss her. Just kiss his Nessie. That's all. His lips missed hers, the soft feeling of their mouths moving in the most perfect harmony that would leave Romeo and Juliet in the dust. _

"_So, how's that milkshake?" Jacob inquired, interestedly arching a brow._

_Nessie's cheeks turned cherry, humming out her satisfaction, and Jacob knew that she was completely aware of the fantasies running around in his head that currently involved her, him, and this table. "Orgasmic."_

"_Maybe you should share," the shape-shifter suggested jokingly, removing his own straw from his soda and tried to dip it into Nessie's strawberry milkshake, but she moved the glass cup closer to her side of the booth in protection._

"_Nuh-uh," Nessie giggled, shaking her head to and fro, the scent of her long reddish-brownish hair swaying with it. "You have to get your own, buddy."_

"_Selfish girl," Jacob accused._

_The half-human half-vampire girl rolled her eyes at him. "Oh, yeah? Then, why did you ask me out on a date, tough guy?" she asked, chewing on a french fry. _

"_What can I say? I'm a sucker for a pretty face," Jacob retorted with a shrug, and winked in the way that made Nessie's heart flutter rapidly, and he grinned knowingly. _

_Somewhere in the hidden journal of his mind, Jacob documented that behaving flirtatiously with her was simple—easy, way more easy than he thought it would be. But then again, everything with Nessie was always easy. As easy as it was to love her, as easy as it was to feel a music-like wonder when he was with her, as easy as it was to float on air when she walked, as easy as it was to sing when she talked, as easy as it was for them to find each other in an insane world. _

_There wasn't anything to fear around Nessie; she was the safest place in the world for him—a sanctuary, a haven. She rarely ever gave him a hard time. Maybe that was supposed to be the thousandth advantage of magic behind imprinting, or she was just. . .the best person in the world. Yeah, that had to be it. _

_They were just natural in each others company._

"_Really?"_

"_Really."_

"_You're sticking with that alibi?"_

"_I am."_

"_You're a sucker for a pretty face?"_

"_Sure, sure."_

"_And that's your final answer?"_

"_Um. . . Yeah."_

"_Whatever, Jacob. You love me."_

"_I do, but you love me, too."_

"_I always have."_

_If it weren't for the dozens of people sitting around, Jacob would have pinned Nessie up the nearest wall and tangled up their mouths to keep them busy from all this chit chat. That would have worked out just fine. She was some type of miracle. What mentally stable guy wouldn't want to kiss her? But if they tried anything, Jacob would pumble those douche bags into the ground. _

_Nessie was his and he was hers—the only way that was right for either of them, the only way they knew how to be. Him and her. Anything else was wrong, illegal, evil, immoral, and Jacob just didn't want to live in a world where Nessie didn't love him; but maybe that wasn't really living. Just plain, boring existence. _

"_That's good to know. Ya know, I was kind of nervous about today." Jacob remarked. _

_His woodland irises locked with Renesmee's milk chocolate ones, and for the quickest of moments, he was nearly lobotomized by the concealed green flecks encircling the pupils, and lost himself in the many, many colors. He struggled to maintain an upbeat disposition when all he wanted to do was fall asleep in her eyes, her eyes like a warm bed. But then, Jacob noticed that Nessie was patiently waiting for him to pay attention to her words._

"_About what?" Renesmee inquired, shaking her head at him. "It's not like we've never gone out for dinner before."_

"_Yeah," Jacob agreed, an expulsion of flat oxygen leaving his chest, "but that was different. We're. . . Well, we're a couple now." He had never been in a relationship with anybody, not until Nessie. Hell, he had never been on a—gulp—date, not until Nessie. They were going the whole nine-yards. Boyfriend and girlfriend. Girlfriend. Not only was Nessie his soul mate, but also his girlfriend. "I've never gone on a date." Then again, neither had she. "It's a first we're going through together." An obstacle, a milestone. "I want today to be special for you."_

"_Jacob," she began, reaching over to trace tiny hearts upon the center of his rough palms, "every second I spend with you is always special. Duh! Don't you already know that? You really didn't need to drive all the way to Seattle for our first date."_

"_Yes. Yes, I did," Jacob retorted rolling his eyes at himself. "With the thoughts I'm having right now, Edward would be having a friggin' conniption." Whatever that meant. "He would have me buried six feet underground."_

"_Really, Jake?" Nessie asked, her voice full of astonishment. This information seemed to please her. "You really think of me like that?"_

"_All the time." After all, he was still a guy. "I'm sorry I'm such a pervert."_

"_Don't be absurd," Nessie told him, in a wonderment still. Oh, she was indeed pleased. Had she really not known the affect she had over him? Was she actually oblivious to how Jacob's heartbeat would stammer under the sweet calculation of her gaze? "It's not like I don't like what I see, too." She winked, embedding her teeth between the rosy flesh of her bottom lip. "I frequently realize that I rather enjoy the view."_

"_Great," Jacob commented facetiously. "Edward must already have a plot to murder me."_

_But in all seriousness, Edward was pretty relaxed when it came to his daughter's brand new relationship, occasionally expressing his plight when Jacob's innocent daydreams strayed and morphed into not-so-innocent ones. He was happy for them, now that they had quite waltzing around their feelings and were finally together. _

_Overall, it was Bella that Jacob had to worry about. Even if Bella had yet to verbalize any outright disapproval, he knew her well enough to know that she wasn't absolutely at ease with the whole idea. Not that Jacob could blame Bella; she never really got a chance to raise Nessie, not like normal parents did anyway._

_Nessie shrugged nonchalantly, if not a little bit smugly. Yeah, thet imprint was mutual. _

"_Over my dead body," she said; although, Jacob knew it was only a joke, there was a part of him that felt uneasy with that phrase. "He'll have to get through me first. Nobody could ever keep me away from you. And that's not a promise, just a face." _

_Either way, her conviction was too strong not to believe._

"_Is that so?"_

"_It's so."_

"_You're always going to get what you want?"_

"_I always have so far."_

"_Touche."_

"_Jeez, Jake. You should just get your facts straight. How long have we known each other?"_

"_I don't know. What's your name again?"_

"_Don't make me get Uncle Emmett."_

"_Yeah, because you always get whatever you want. I should have known, you spoiled princess."_

"_Hey. That's Miss Princess to you, bucko." Misses._

"_Bossy."_

"_Shut up."_

_Then, a light bulb flickered on in Jacob's head. It was only a thought, one back-up plan in case all hell broke loose one fine day. Perhaps, it was silly of Jacob to even want to mention it out loud, but silliness was always a luxury he could indulge in around Nessie. He had complete freedom to be a total dork with Nessie—all those bonfires where they would sneak off to their cliff to boogie to random 90's songs, or when they would imitate animal sounds, or their numerous innuendos shared and traded during walks in the forest, or staying up late to make fun of movies._

"_Hey, Nessie," Jacob whispered, motioning for Nessie to lean in closer as he did._

"_Yeah, Jacob?"_

"_I've got an idea," he began in a nefarious tone, conveying his absolute delight with himself, and felt like a child, hiding underneath the slide to kiss a girl for the first time, "but it's a secret. You can't tell Bella or Rosalie. Don't even think it around Edward."_

"_Okie dokie," the half-human half-vampire agreed chipperly._

"_I don't know if life is always gonna be fair to us," it broke his heart to even contemplate even three days with Nessie's laugh, without Nessie's smile, to help him cope for the day. The ties of the imprint pulled tightly at Jacob's stomach, and he felt almost nauseous, "or if we'll always be together. Let's meet here, in this exact spot, if we get separated."_

_Nessie's eyes searched all across the masculine shapes of Jacob's face, confused by the sentiment as if she didn't like it. She, then, stood up and sat on Jacob's side of the table booth, and pecked him on the cheek, the tickling sensation of her tender lips lingered and burned against his skin._

"_That's just not possible, Jacob," she assured him. "It can't be. We will never be apart."_

"_I know," he murmured, under this half-breed's spell. "Well, on the off chance. I want us to be together even if the world falls down, even if the stars fall out of the sky." _

"_I had no idea you were such a sap at heart, Jacob Black, but your copy of the Notebook should have tipped me off," Nessie quipped, and quirked an eyebrow. "It's really sexy."_

_Jacob rolled his eyes. "I already told you that was Rachel's, not mine."_

"_Keep telling yourself that," Nessie retorted._

"_Quit trying to change the subject."_

"_Now who's being bossy?"_

"_Anyway," Jacob continued, "we just need some sort of insurance, and I know you would never break a promise, especially when it involves your pinky." He stuck out his baby finger for Nessie's._

"_All right, all right. You win," Nessie conceded, and latched her pinky around his. "I pinky promise that this is where we'll meet again should we ever lose each other—which we won't."_

"_Thank you for humoring me," he replied, resting his head against hers, and managed a small smile._

"_How could I not?" Her question was rhetorical._

_A kindly, chipper waitress, a familiar face that Jacob inwardly swore he had encountered somewhere before, appeared suddenly, but briefly looked at his imprint in an outlandish recognition. Cinnamon orbs, that may or may not have been contacts, strawberry blonde hair, and there were similarities between the two women that Jacob couldn't help but notice. _

"_Hey, guys!" the waitress exclaimed happily. "How is everything?"_

_Nessie and Jacob exchanged smiles. "Perfect."_

* * *

><p>Unlike that morning on La Push, Jacob awoke with the most beautiful woman in the universe, protectively and possessively wrapped up in his strong arms, the alluring aroma of caramel and pine tangled deliciously in Nessie's auburn tendrils. Serenity illuminated from Jacob's russet skin, the tired spirit of a smile etching the contours of his mouth. His Nessie, asleep and beautiful. Though, he had to ask himself if this was the only time he had ever woken up with her at his side, fore it felt almost too good to be true, while the smell of her was everywhere. It felt so routine, so regular to be lying like this—with her body snuggled close to his, using his broad chest as a pillow—yet something this simple, this proximity seemed so damn second natural, and made his heart thump erratically.<p>

Flickers of a dream—Nessie's dream—fast-forwarded through his head accidentally, and what he saw endeared him inhumanly; the corners of his mouth twitched into a thin smirk, his dark brown eyes intense and focused on her, his dimples. . . And a promise made between them, one he couldn't quite hear. The words traded in Nessie's dream universe were almost completely inaudible, their laughter ringing. Jacob could watch this forever, the blurred, brightened colors, as if he had done this a thousand times. Maybe he had.

His lips kissed Nessie's forehead, the gentlest of wake up calls. A hollow breath was expelled from her system, her eyelids fluttering open. "Good morning, Sleeping Beauty."

She yawned in exhaustion. "Good morning, Prince Charming."

"Have I ever told you how enamored I am with your eyes?" Jacob pondered aloud, staring in captivation into her amazing milk chocolate eyes, and their contours put him in some sort of a trance. Pure joy surrounded him—a redemption and a rebirth found with the great morning—and there was no way he was ever letting her go.

Nessie laughed. "Perhaps once or twice," she said, shrugging, "in another life. Or yesterday."

"I keep forgetting if I think about how wonderful you are out loud or not," the shape-shifter responded with a flirtatious wink, but was being genuine.

He must have sounded like a broken record, but he just wanted to tell her all the time what she meant to him—how exactly she meant to him. Jacob realized that it would take a mere three words, the most complicated of cliched phrases in the entire human language. But he questioned himself—not his constantly growing love for Nessie, he certain that would last forever—he didn't, however, trust himself, or maybe the timing was all wrong. There was always that putrid reluctance numbing the short syllables on his tongue. I love you. I love you. I love you. . . See? How hard was that? What was holding him back?

"That's okay," she told him, her expression finally registering the magic of this particular morning. "I. . . I. . ."

"Yeah?" Jacob queried, the pair of them sitting up on the sofa. "What is it, Nessie?"

Her smooth hands reached for Jacob's face, regarding him with soft orbs of liquid chocolate pudding, and swept her thumbs across his dimples. Jacob's heartbeat roared thunderously as Renesmee showed him visions- a whole world spinning out of control, the russet colors of shimmering from his hot skin, feelings of innocence and desire swirling in confusion. "I feel dizzy when I'm with you, like I'm falling down or falling in-"

"Place," Jacob offered for Nessie kindly. "Like things are falling into place."

She nodded. "Yeah, something like that." Nessie chortled at herself, and shook her head in a slight frustration. "We should probably get up."

"Aw, man!" the Quileute complained, wrinkling his nose. "Do we have to?"

"Well, I know I definitely have to. I need to take a shower," Nessie said, running her fingers through her long, bronze curls.

"You smell perfectly fine to me," Jacob countered, leaning back on the couch. Actually, if sexy had an exact scent, Nessie's would be it. Her hair smelt like strawberry shampoo and vanilla and her skin smelt like sugary, fresh fruits with just a hint of rain.

"That's because I'm covered in your wolfy germs, Mister," the half-human half-vampire woman quipped, quirking a joking eyebrow.

Was she trying to say that he stunk? "Hey! I'm covered in your freaky vampire germs!" he exclaimed in feigned offense.

In a flash, Jacob had his Nessie firmly pressed against the nearest wall in a feral lust. His large hands were placed on her plump hips, lifting her up from the ground and allowed her to immediately wrap her thin gams around his waist. His morning wood brushed against her inner thighs, and he grunted roughly.

"And trust me," Nessie began, her heart skipping a vital beat, "you're a lot cleaner for it."

"My mind sure isn't," Jacob replied.

"That's not my fault," Nessie murmured, her breath trembling needfully. Her temperate sky-rocketed, arousal claiming the porcelain pigments of her skin to turn them red.

"Yes, it is. It's all your fault," for how the chemicals in his body bubbled, all of his blood just barely in his top brain.

Jacob lowered his lips to her neck, alternating between peppering ghostly kisses and nibbling between the soft juncture of her throat and clavicle. The yearning to get closer to Nessie controlled the excited chaos of desperation to make her evoked along with him. His teeth carefully penetrating the hybrid's mooncream flesh, and soaked in the sweet fragrance of her through his nostrils—an enthralled smell perfuming the basement, and he knew that they were treading dangerous waters. Each of Nessie's ten fingers became gratefully lost in the midnight-black of his hair, subtle and wild in her eros.

"Jake?" Renesmee inquired, her breasts pressed firmly against his own chest.

"Hmmm?" She was gonna stop him now, wasn't she?

"Seattle. . ." the girl-woman whispered. "Why did you move there?"

Huh? Didn't they already have this conversation? "I just couldn't stay on La Push beca-"

"No," Nessie interrupted, pushing him away from her tenderly. "I mean, why did you choose to run away there?"

The shape-shifter, rubbing the back of his neck in a weary perplexity. "I don't know, Nessie. There's no good reason, not one that needs to be unearthed or whatever. That's just where my feet stopped," came his lack of explanation.

"Oh," Nessie uttered casually, and shrugged it off in displeasure. She glanced down to the floor.

"Did I say something wrong?" Jacob asked.

"No, of course not," Nessie said, looking back up at him. "Of course not, Jacob." She smiled, placing a soft kiss on the side of his cheek. "Okay. My parents first saw each other in a crowded cafeteria on Macaroni Day, and met in Biology. There is nothing remotely romantic about that. It was random, and they fell in love in a snap. You and I—we met in a cafe, and then you hated me!" she reasoned, albeit spastically, shaking her head repeatedly. "Jacob, was our meeting random? Was it an accident?"

Jacob frowned. "I don't know, Nessie, and I honestly don't give a shit. Whatever brought us together, I don't regret it for one second," he answered, quickly reliving the day they met. Of course there was their initial attraction, that undeniable chemistry, but if it had been Fate, Jacob would have imprinted on her. His. . . His soul mate was still somewhere out there in the world, but he doubted she'd be as beautiful as Nessie. It was impossible. "If I question it, I'll go insane."

"You're right, Jacob." Nessie gave him an apologetic grimace, and he chuckled.

"So," he started, wiggling a dastardly eyebrow, and grinned down at her with arousal still very thick in the air, "what about that shower?"

"Keep talking," Nessie commanded sweetly, pursing her lips interestedly.

"You and me and hot water," he fiddled with a loose string at the hem of her undershirt, "and getting somewhat clean. But mostly, we'll just be getting dirtier." His forest irises scanned her physique, and had to bite his tongue to stop himself from drooling.

She scrunched her nose up like a bunny, as if she were actually thinking it over, and then her features lit up like the Fourth of July. "Okay! Race you!" Nessie giggled, the lovebirds running upstairs to the restroom.

_Hey_

_I finally found you_

_Been dreaming about you_

_You are the girl that's been _

_Running around in my_

_Why don't you come and go with me?_

_Somehow I know I've waited my whole life_

_To see you standing with the wind in your hair_

_I'm as sure as a boy could be_

_You are the girl that's been_

_Running around in my dreams_


	30. Love, Sex, and Magic

**Disclaimer: Nothing belongs to me. Song by Ciara and Justin Timberlake.**

_Everything ain't what it seems_

_I wave my hands_

_And I got you_

_And you feel so fly assisting me_

_But now it's my turn to watch you_

_I ain't gonna stop you_

_A loud, earth-shattering scream awoke an exhausted Jacob Black from his deep sleep, blood freezing dryly in his veins and his heart palpitated violently. _

_What. . . ? _

_Immediately, his eyes snapped wide open to soak in the putrid darkness of the room. What was going on? Jacob's arms reached out to the opposite side of the king-sized mattress, trying to feel for his new wife's soft, warm body, but—except for the fruity scent of her hair lingering on the pillow—there wasn't a trace of her. _

_Where was Nessie? _

_They had only lived as husband and wife for barely a fortnight, but Jacob had become so accustomed to having his Nessie sleeping soundly in his arms; and her suddenly not being there nearly gave him a heart attack. _

_Could something have happened to her? _

_His heartbeat quickened rapidly. _

_Where could she be?_

_In the next second, Jacob bolted out of bed and into the living room, prepared to do whatever was necessary to protect his soul mate. On the contrary, he discovered Nessie standing on the coffee table as her knees trembled slightly in fear. The sight bewildered him greatly, his head tilting in perplexity. _

"_Jacob!" she gasped in a raspy voice, and pointed toward his foot._

"_Nessie, wha. . . ?" Jacob trailed off, a questioning expression written all over his face, and glanced down._

_This was just too precious. _

_Renesmee Cullen (actually, her last name was Black now, wasn't it?)—a half-human half-vampire hybrid, known to be quite the little spitfire at times, the toughest sparring competitor for her uncle Jasper, and always the devious champion when it came to besting Sam, Paul, Jared, and Collin in an arm wrestling match—was terrified by a teeny-tiny cockroach. _

_And Jacob, despite being tired from a long day at work, lost it; he cracked up so bad that he actually slapped his knee. _

"_It's not funny!" Renesmee shouted, dangerously glowering at him._

"_Ahhahah—yes—ahha—it—hah—is!" Jacob retorted between bubbly fits of laughter, crying and holding his stomach as the roach crawled closer to a frazzled Renesmee, who was much too frightened to make any attempts to scurry away. _

"_Jake!" Nessie whined, her anger at him melting away, and instead became desperate for a much needed rescue._

_The breathless Alpha wiped away the falling tears from his eyes, and managed to holler, "Look out, Nessie! Check out the claws on that monster! You're lucky it wanted to keep you alive this long! Oh, my gosh! Run! Go! Quick! Save yourself!"_

"_Oh, you are absolutely dreadful!" Nessie squeaked, the sound altogether too similar to a puppy. "The next time Aunt Rosalie spits in your food, I will not be there to save you! You can count on that! I swear it!"_

_Jacob rolled his eyes, and lifted one foot up to appease his wife. "C'mon, you're all right. See, I'm gonna-"_

"_No!"_

"_What now?"_

"_Don't kill it," Nessie said; Jacob furrowed his dark eyebrows in exasperation. "Just throw it outside or something!"_

_The shape-shifter had to sigh to stifle another set of laughter, and then went to a kitchen to get a broom. He really should have known that Nessie wouldn't have been a totally predictable female. Most would have ordered their husbands to squash the defenseless, little cockroach without a second thought, but Renesmee wasn't like that at all. She was a life-loving creature—she never killed for sport or out of a mere fear, but because animal blood happened to be a part of her diet. Even if the critter made her shake like a leaf, Nessie wouldn't demand for its destruction. _

_So, Jacob opened the front door and swept the creepy-crawly out. When he finished his matrimonial bug related obligation, the broom was put back and Nessie was safe._

"_There. It's gone," Jacob stated, grinning._

_Nessie took a hesitant step off the coffee table, and displaced a relieved suspiration. "Thank you."_

_She still seemed a little shaken, which caused Jacob to kind of regret making fun of her. "You're welcome. Are you okay?"_

"_Uh-huh," Nessie nodded absentmindedly, the experience leaving her just a bit lightheaded._

"_Come here, Nessie," Jacob bidded her closer to him, hugged her protectively in his warm arms, and kissed her forehead. "You know, you nearly scared me half to death, too."_

"_I did?"_

"_Yeah."_

"_How?"_

"_I woke up and you were gone," Jacob elaborated, cupping Nessie's flushed cheeks. "For just a split-second, I thought the last two weeks had been a really awesome dream."_

"_Oh, Jacob. . ." Nessie's mouth formed a weary smile, her eyes darkening as they were suddenly half-lidded, though the chocolate hue held several nefarious inklings. "That is the cheesiest pick-up line ever."_

"_Yeah, but did it work?"_

"_Oh, yes."_

* * *

><p>"<em>Okay, okay. I got one," Jacob announced in a calm, yet giddy tone, while several alabaster constellations lit up the indigo night, and he and his best friend laid upon their cliff to stare skywardly. "Would you rather be stranded on an island with Leah for the rest of your life or have a threesome with Taylor Lautner and Betty White?"<em>

_Nessie screwed her face up in disgust. "What kind of question is that?" Jacob grinned in a lousy response. "Can I have sex with one of them more than the other?"_

"_No," he answered to torture the five-going-on-fifteen year-old. "You have to give them equal amounts of attention." But he really didn't enjoy the idea of his imprint being in the company of any persons in the buff. _

_She crinkled her nose and her right eye twitched. "Er. . . Maybe. . . But Taylor is soooo hot. . . Um, Leah. . ."_

_The half-man half-wolf snorted at that, shaking his head. _

_Almost simultaneously, he and Nessie sat up to observe the small paradise of the First Beach shore, where a plethora of party animals and their soul maters celebrated the initiation of Seth's imprint as a member of the pack. Jacob glanced at his own imprint, whose ever-calculating milk chocolate orbs were fixated on Marguerite and Seth dancing by the fire. Thanks to her, the couple had finally worked up the testicles to confess all their feelings for one another. _

"_And once again, the venomless wonder gets exactly what she wants," the Native Quileute remarked, nudging his companion against her elbow._

"_I wouldn't have it any other way," Nessie said, sticking out her tongue at him. "It's one of the many, fine genetic perks of being a Cullen."_

"_Whatever you say," his mantra whenever he was around Nessie, which happened to be all the time. "But Seth and Madge do look a hell of a whole lot happier." _

_Hell, Jacob knew that they must have been absolutely beaming with euphoria, whether they were relieved to be done with their pre-relationship jitters or simply being together—maybe both. Okay, probably both. Nessie had done them a big favor by playing matchmaker, fore she had that ability that nobody could resist. Even Leah, now less bitter in her contempt for Emily and Sam, was swayed by the young girl's charm. She was wonderful. _

_Her real powers went beyond speed, strength, twenty-twenty vision, and special means of communication. Her real powers lied deep down in her heart, but remained all over her sleeves. Love. Her real powers were love, to love and to be loved in return, to spread love. _

"_They're soul mates, right?" she asked, tranquility and excitement in her tone. "Imprinting and what not."_

"_Yeah."_

"_It's cute—the way Seth and Marguerite look at each other, like their love can save the world. It's the same way Sam and Emily look at each other, Jared and Kim, Paul and Rachel. They were so afraid to even talk to each other at first." Nessie rolled her eyes. "Ridiculous._

"_Then, you meddled," the shape-shifter stated. _

_It was funny. Despite the the imprint, Seth wouldn't have had the courage to talk to Marguerite without Nessie's assistance. In that way, she was an unstoppable force._

"_Do you hear anyone complaining, dimples?" Nessie inquired, poking his shoulder in jest._

"_Nah," he poked her back. "Seth's just gonna owe you one for the rest of his life."_

"_Like you wouldn't believe, honey," Nessie replied matter-of-factually, and patted him on either shoulder._

_There was a miniature surge of chemical activity that struck the unsuspecting man momentarily senseless. His stomach swashed nervously at the contact, and soundlessly gulped. It scared him half to death, but it had to have been the aspect of the grand night. There was an energy—a magic—in the air, friends and family bonding by the light of the fire, the moon and stars all aglow up in the sky, and a new relationship blossoming below. _

_It was just one of those nights when falling in love seemed like a difficult task to avoid. Inevitable. _

_But he was perfectly fine with it, at least on this night. Perhaps, it was a mere spell of the soothing wind—temporary insanity—or he really didn't care to be bothered by it right now. Of course he loved Nessie; of course he might have felt an unconditional attraction to her; of course he might even be falling in love with her. They made sense together, especially when they made no sense at all. Jacob didn't want to care about what he truthfully meant to Nessie, just that he meant something to her. _

"_But it must be great when you finally find the one person you're meant to spend the rest of your life with," Nessie added gently, lying back on their cliff again, "and when it's fate-guaranteed. I can't wait to fall in love someday." Yeah. That typical girlie stuff._

"_Ew!" Jacob exclaimed like a little boy! "Cooties! All those stupid kissy faces! Yuck!"_

"_Shut up," she mockingly ordered, softly kicking him in the butt. "I want that. God, I want that so bad—what Seth and Marguerite have, what my parents have. . . Don't you, Jacob?" It was an earnest question, and he was supposed to give her an earnest answer._

_He shrugged. In the real world, it took a lot of time to find another heart that you really trusted, but in second, Jacob found the sweetest thing ever, Nessie. . .—thanks to his wolf genetics. But how could he make her understand that? _

"_I don't know. Maybe? I guess, for right now that I'm cool with chillaxing with my best friend."_

"_Who? Embry?"_

"_No! I mean you, bird brain!"_

_The half-breed giggled inaudibly, grateful for Jacob's bizarre compliment. "Seth and Marguerite are really lucky," she murmured, the sea of stars reflected in the emerald flecks of her irises. "I can't believe neither of them were brave enough to make the first move. All those months of dancing around the truth. To let love almost slip away like that! Ugh!" Nessie hugged passionately, as Jacob lied back down beside her, and rested his head on his wrist to properly look at his imprint. "Ridiculous! It's so infuriating! Not everyone gets an imprint. You know, Jacob, there's nothing more I hate than seeing two people who are cosmically flawless for one another, and then they are so blind to what is right in front of them. Or they do see it, and they are too cowardice to do anything about it."_

"_Yeah, I know, Nessie," he whispered. There was something in her voice that conveyed a silent pain, and Jacob just wanted to make it go away. "You always let your heart get involved. That's what I love best about you."_

_She never made it a secret who she really was inside._

"_Everyone deserves love, Jacob," Renesmee, ever the romantic, told him._

_Jacob raised an eyebrow. "Even me?"_

"_Even you," Nessie said; Jacob watched the beautiful contours of her shell-pink lips as they moved slowly to create words, that voice resounding in his mind. "Do you want to head back down to the bonfire?"_

"_Not really," he said, shaking his head. Nothing beat being alone with Nessie. "Hanging out with you is exciting enough." Jacob heard her heart thump especially loud._

"_Jacob, in case I haven't told you yet today—I love you." Damn it. Where's his heart? Did it melt?_

"_I love you, too, kiddo," Jacob retorted. Her body curled up against his side, on a determined hunt for his warmth, and it was like second nature for him to accept this proximity. "Hey, what's the guy and girl version of no homo?"_

"_No hetero?" Renesmee shrugged against Jacob tiredly._

_That made Jacob chuckle, even if it wasn't technically true. Every second that ticked by he was more and more certain about what he was suddenly feeling. "You are the best person in the world—no hetero."_

"_I want to bare your child one day," not one of her worst ideas. "No hetero."_

"_Child? As in one?" Jacob inquired. "So, I guess it's like, 'Okay. One baby, let's name it Tommy, and then adios!' Jerk!"_

* * *

><p>Fast water landed on the white tile floor—<em>fwit, fwit, fwit<em>! Every clear surface and glass object fogged up.

Not that Jacob and Nessie cared to notice at all; they were too busy enjoying each other being shiny and naked. Currently, Nessie had her back turned toward Jacob, the beads of water falling down every inch of her vanilla flesh.

New scents of soap, body wash, and shampoo combined, but it was the distinct aroma of a certain hybrid's lust that intoxicated Jacob's senses. His mouth watered in growing thirst, his forest-colored orbs fixated on one, tiny droplet of transparent liquid slowly surfing down her left shoulder, and Jacob longed to lick Nessie all over. The blood rushed to his groin, swelling from the girth and length as desire threatened to consume his better judgment.

Jacob glided the soap over her shoulder blades, the small bubbles becoming slippery as they clung to her body, and then he mischievously went down to wash the subtle, supple slopes of Renesmee's backside—effectively catching her off guard in the best of ways.

"Ooh," she squeaked. "Getting a bit daring, aren't we?"

"I couldn't help myself," Jacob chuckled out his confession, grinning from ear to ear.

It didn't help that her ass was practically pleading for a little attention—attention that he was more than willing to give.

"Hmm," she purred in utter tranquility, gripping at nothing to keep her balance, but she trusted Jacob to never let her fall.

"Don't pretend like you're not enjoying yourself."

"I am."

"What was that? Speak a little louder, Nessie. I can't hear you," Jacob whispered, his warm breath tickling her earlobe in deviltry. "Say it."

He gave Nessie a light smack on the ass, more for his enjoyment than hers. One of his long copper fingers roamed between the slick folds of her unappeased womanhood. A frustrated whimper emanated from her mouth, and Nessie shivered in a blissful delight. Her darkened auburn hair swung to and from, and Jacob let out a thick rumble from his chest to convey his own impulses.

"Jacob!" she exclaimed, turning around to face him. "Don't. . . Not that like that," Nessie implored breathlessly, her nails digging into his forearm.

"Don't what?" the Quileute queried, worried that he had done something to upset her.

"If you're going to touch me, touch me hard," Renesmee commanded.

An intrigued current of want rippled throughout her. She ran a hand from Jacob's wide, muscular chest, where every single russet fiber became an erogenous zone; and descended to his rock-solid abdominals. Her white fingernails traced rhythmic circles around and into his skin, transfixed by Jacob's obvious rugged physique.

Jacob obeyed her gentle orders, licking his lips like a wolf on the prowl.

A hand caressed the slender valley of Nessie's round breasts—hard, but it wasn't enough to satisfy either of them. He wished the the space between their bodies wasn't real—didn't exist. It didn't need to exist.

With any other woman formerly in his life, there was always that characteristic male need to—well—to fuck. Raw. Rough. All or nothing. No real feelings whatsoever.

But with Nessie, Jacob felt passion in Nessie's mere presence, need under her studious, smoldering, fawn vision that could thaw a glacier, fire wherever her miraculous touch lingered in a vague sensation, and this was more than just sex. With simple sex, people didn't feel like they were of the utmost importance to the other person. He wanted to make Nessie feel just as special.

Loved.

Before Jacob could even blink, his body was suddenly locked between the cold, tile wall and his Nessie. The world disappeared into a bright darkness—moonlit flesh against bronze flesh—while a dizzying ambition permeated across the washroom. Steam radiated off their bodies, like a hot wind created from their desire.

Nessie's restless, yet steady tongue fought fervently for dominance, only slightly astounding the would-have-been Alpha, whose personality was naturally demandingly bossy, but the wolf blatantly loved this new means of attention. It was a new thing for him—to submit, but Jacob had already surrendered to Nessie in so many different ways.

Still, their tongues continued to clash and collide, as eros for more increased significantly.

"Renesmee. . ." Jacob murmured against her lips, dipping his face into her neck.

She laughed, weaving her nimble fingers through Jacob's silken, raven locks. "Oh, you can call me Nessie."

"Nessie, we should find a softer surface, don't you think?"

"I think you're a very smart man, Jacob Black."

"Glad you do."

In one second, the water was turned off. In the next second, two hot and wet bodies fell upon the guest mattress. Naked—a fact that startled Jacob momentarily, and now it was his turn to be completely unprepared for such an extreme step. Had Nessie changed her mind? But damn it. No, there was a large part of him—a very large part—that yearned to keep going.

Jacob lifted himself up, hovering above his half-human half-vampire breed to properly examine her with an intense concern. She was a tempting sight, that was for sure. But he knew that he wanted to make love to her the right way—slow and soft, as though to make it last forever.

Just not today. Another day.

"I don't want to anything either of us will regret," Jacob told Nessie, laying on affectionate kiss atop her forehead.. "You're kind of too importance to me, honey. I don't wanna hurt you."

Wow. Did he just say that to her? A werewolf? To a vampire mutant hybrid? The other enemy? Double wow.

"No. No, my Jacob," Nessie muttered, brushing her soft mouth along the base of his jaw to soothe him. "There is not a shadow of a possibility that you could ever harm me."

"I," Jacob exhaled halfheartedly, mostly because the other half of his heart was tightening as if it was Nessie that was plucking at the heartstrings, "was an idiot when I found out who you really were. If I could take it back, I would. I should have told you-"

"Jake, I don't care about all that anymore," Nessie said, the least bit concerned over what was past, "but you know. . . it really is a challenge to be having a serious talk when we're both very, very nude at the moment. Let's just cut the chit chat."

"Mhmm," he agreed, nodding moronically.

"I don't want to have sex," Nessie stated evenly, "but we've already learned together than I am ready to explore other things. You know how I am."

"You want some other fun?" Jacob inquired, a grin smeering across his expression.

"Yep!" the hybrid giggled deviously.

"Get ready then," Jacob warned.

Quite wickedly, he flipped their position on the bed so that Nessie sat on top of him, both legs resting over his waist. The view wasn't anything to take for granted either.

Her breasts—rounded and perky like a young woman's should be, as the center bud of each peach-pink areola pebbled tautly in excitement. Her hair—still soaking wet, dangling like an autumn disarray over him. Her mouth plumped up smirk that invoked heat from the pit of Jacob's stomach that made him want to attack her with kisses.

However, there remained an undeniable confusion plastered on the quirk of Nessie's right brow. It was sort of cute.

"Jacob, what am I doing up here?" Nessie asked, her cheeks aflame.

"Turn around, Nessie, and I'll give a demonstration," Jacob retorted. He imagined giving himself a pat on the back. That was rather smooth of him.

She did was she was told, her ass seated upon his lower torso, and Jacob pulled her closer so that her nether regions were splayed square below his chin. In a triad of seconds later, he grasped her hips firmly between his hands hands and carefully placed Nessie's feminine bits over his face.

With a teasing flick of his tongue beneath the swell of of her clit, Nessie finally understood Jacob's intentions, and laid her body over his. A ready and attentive tongue lapped the salty precum from Jacob's manhood, as she moved at a sloth's speed to take in all of him.

Jacob had to persevere for concentration, sucking and biting gently at Nessie's engorged nub of fire. And that pleasured groan was practically an orchestrated symphony of awesomeness to his ears. The sound reverberated around his proud rod. Nessie's tongue, too, was busy at work. Her tongue orbited around the mushroom-shaped head, then ran her tongue along the thick, pulsating vein, and Jacob felt a delicious tremor travel up his spine. Razor-sharp teeth that could easily shred into his skin grazed masterfully along the entire shaft.

If Nessie kept that up, she would turn him into a puddle of gooey slush.

His heartbeat sped up, quickening with thudding gallops.

The one hundred eight degrees temperature climbed to an excruciating one hundred twelve degrees. Meanwhile, he worked hard to bring Nessie the same pleasure, his tongue flattening against her pink slit, and licked up and down, before entering the girl-woman's moistened, deep center, really relishing in the sweet nectar of her heated core. His cock twitched painfully in the warmth of Nessie's ever-obliging mouth, as his balls tightened—almost there.

"Ja-ake!" Renesmee whimpered, her hitching in the back of her throat.

The part-wolf part-man growled in absolute enrapture. It was so unnerving how wonderful his name sounded from Nessie's beautiful voice. "Nessie!"

"Please!" she begged.

Nessie engulfed Jacob's long staff until his tapped the back of her throat—over and over again. His mind consequently became lost in a haze of the most excellent, extreme high, and embedded his two fingers within her slick center to pump in and out. Even more honey-like fluid gushed out of her pussy, her thighs opening wider, as she rode Jacob's tongue and digits. His poor Nessie let out a trembling scream, sucking his erection harder and faster, and effectively elicited the same reaction from Jacob.

He could feel the needy sensation building—not just the urge for the best release, but happiness.

The need left him hurting everywhere—his stomach churned, his legs ached, his mouth dried, and he wondered if Nessie was feeling the same way. Maybe not. Maybe this was a feeling meant for only him. But he felt so good, too.

Finally, the couple climaxed.

Renesmee came. Her shouts of relief echoed off the thin walls, as her tight entrance clenched around Jacob's digits like a divine vice, and her female juices melted and streamed out her core. Breath after breath emitted shakily in sated gratification. The entire universe was within her reach as her toes curled.

Jacob came within that exact moment. He grunted and groaned and made all sorts of primal noises, as white orgasm drizzled onto the half-human half-vampire's eager taste buds. Appeased and more than satisfied, as a thousand colors exploded into the star-filled atmosphere.

Their two bodies went limp, and a choir of angels belted out the Hallelujah chorus. Nessie took a minute to recover, and then crawled up to Jacob's side.

"Incredible," Jacob sighed tiredly, kissing her on the nose. "Nessie, you are. . ."

"As are you, my Jacob," Nessie simpered in reply. "Do you want to do that again?"

"Hells yeah!"

_So let me drive my body around ya_

_I bet you know what I mean_

_'Cause you know that I can make believe in_

_Love, sex, and magic_


	31. Rescue Me

**Disclaimer: Nothing belongs to me. Song by Kerrie Roberts.**

_This awaking nightmare lingers_

_When will the mirror stop telling lies?_

_I don't know where I've been_

_Or where I'm going_

_But I can't do it alone_

_I'm reaching out_

Afternoon dawned quickly that day for Jacob and Renesmee, their time together racing along with their fun. Now, the two sat on the sofa, mildly engrossed with a Disney film. Nessie would hum along with the songs, occasionally chattering with Jacob over some the details, and they laughed.

Sometimes it felt as though they had done this more than a thousand times—talking, laughing until they couldn't they couldn't breathe anymore—which was a ridiculous notion. She had only known Jacob for a handful of days, and already the urges to be much more intimate with him conquered the majority of her fantasies; he had seen her naked, for goodness sake—touched and kissed places that were so long dormant. Nessie was comfortable around him, but she barely knew a thing about him and vice-versa.

Yet they knew each other more than the people that had known them all their lives.

It was nice.

"See, I don't know how I would feel if some Native American dude popped out of the bushes with a spear while I was making out with my boyfriend, and he's all like, 'Ayiyiyi!'" Nessie shouted, holding an imaginary weapon in her right hand, making an absurd noise. "That would be kind of awkward. Mhmm."

Jacob chortled at his silliness, and jabbed an accusatory index finger in her direction. "Cullen, you are a filthy racist!"

"How does that make me a racist?" Nessie scoffed, combing her fingers through her penny-colored tendrils. A brow furrowed in feigned offense. "It is clearly in the movie."

"I bet you picked it just so you could make bigoted remarks," Jacob replied jokingly, shaking his head. "Tsk, tsk."

"Pfft."

"Ha! So you admit it!"

"Whatever you say, Jacob."

He leaned back against the couch, sending a wink toward the hybrid—a simple wink, that was all she needed to cause her heart to flutter nervously—as he rested his feet in her lap. "Brings back some fond memories, though, I always thought Pocahontas was hot," he said.

"Really?" she inquired in a sarcastic tone, but Jacob nodded. "I thought Kocoum was handsome—tan skin, muscles, but he was as dull as a rock." Nessie slanted her mouth in a bored expression. "John Smith had a better personality." However, Nessie wasn't really interested into blond guys. "If you put those two together, we would get you."

"I'm nothing like either of them," the shape-shifter retorted, folding his arms over his chest.

Nessie couldn't help but muse that Jacob was too cute for his own good. Just about everything he did or said made the young girl's stomach flip-flop with butterflies. Was it really possible to the this attracted to someone?

Every gesture, every breath, every word, every move, every glance sparked a perpetual flame in her heart, her love for him constantly growing. And that was scary. Love at first sight was just a notion of grandeur and fairy tales that she didn't really believe in, not even when Bella assured her that she loved Edward from the start; but maybe it hadn't been love at first sight for Jacob and Nessie. Just maybe.

Still, she had been entirely aware of the Herculean strength of their magnetic, chemical draw toward one another. It was impossible to deny. But it sure felt a lot like love at first sight—the universe finally revealing its master plan for her life, and every fiber of her being dazed in love—a pleasant situation to discover herself in. In love. And there was no better man. Jacob probably didn't know about the dozens of monarchs soaring around in her stomach, but she knew that he had to feel the same way.

But he didn't imprint on her. That meant he still had a soul mate somewhere.

"Of course you are," Renesmee giggled.

"Am not. And I'm more awesome than those two dingleberries put together," Jacob insisted,sticking out his tongue.

"Well," Nessie began in a voice pretending to be disapproving, "at least you're a little more than two dimensional." That, and definitely more tangible than a cartoon. Sexier.

"Now you have me curious," the man-wolf confessed in reluctance. "How do I remind you of them?"

"For instance, Kocoum is convinced that the pale faces are the enemy," the half-human half-vampire retorted, unblinking and smirking.

"Who really can blame him?" Jacob inquired rhetorically, shrugging as though he quite agreed. "Those bastards shot his friend."

Nessie shook her head unfavorably. "I am totally naïve to the ways of the world, but one action does not represent a whole group of people. He was ignorant, like you were. No offense," she said.

Renesmee knew ordinary people feared things that they refused to understand; and by some human instinct, predictably opted for war. It was funny honestly, but that never stopped it from happening. War was always thought of before peace.

"A lot taken, but keep going." Jacob waved his fingers at her, seeming genuinely interested (and slightly amused) by Nessie's personal ideals and morals.

Or maybe it was immature to him that she had such simplistic visions of how the world should work—everyone should just get along with each other. Was it really that impossible? But she could have easily been wrong—what seemed easy for her perhaps was difficult for everybody else.

"He loved Pocahontas, or at least really cared about her. It was jealousy that fueled him to attack John Smith, not necessarily prejudice," Nessie elaborated, glancing away from Jacob. There wasn't actually anything about his past she could remember, only things she could imagine—with countless stabs to the heart. "John Smith, on the other hand, opened his heart up to a brand new world, because of love. He learns that people are much more than what they appear—that the world is complex and simple, at the same time."

"And I learned the same thing?" he asked, cocking an incredulous eyebrow.

"I hope so," she nodded with a complimentary wink.

"Nessie, can I tell you a secret?" Jacob, then sat up on the couch, a look of concerned question written across his expression.

"Absolutely, Jacob. Anything," Renesmee reassured him.

The angels sang—Jacob wanted to tell her a secret! And that was perfect. It meant that he trusted her. As much as Nessie increasingly enjoyed the physical aspect of their relationship, she would honestly rather take her time getting to know him, and time wasn't a luxury. He still hadn't changed his mind about returning to Seattle after Seth and Madge's wedding. There could be a slight chance that she would follow him, as she continued to learn that wherever Jacob went was where she truly belonged in the universe. All he had to do was ask. Or say _it_. But she refused to intrude in on his life, to turn this into something more than what it was to him, so Nessie didn't get her hopes up.

Oh. But she did. She hoped that the compassion behind Jacob's kisses wasn't a fantastic illusion that her mind created. She hoped Jacob would stay, move back to La Push, where he and his family belonged. She hoped there would come a day, somewhere in the near future, when Jacob would just tell her how he really felt. And she would say that she loved him, too, because she did. Renesmee Cullen one hundred percent was truly, absolutely, deeply, and insanely in love with Jacob Black—woah. . . !

That idea alone was something Nessie had never considered when looking through Billy Black's old family photo albums or taking naps in Jacob's room. He was—well-he had begged Bella to abort her, for crying out loud! If anything, Nessie's expectation was to resent him, but he ended up being so damn adorable, that there was a charm that she couldn't resist. Nessie loved being around him; it was always entertaining.

In hindsight, on the other hand, it did actually make sense why, as a little girl, she felt a curious attraction to Jacob's mysterious life, like destiny. Maybe she was meant to be in love with Jacob. After all, that was the beauty of irony—expectations were not allowed to match up with the outcome. Besides, Nessie didn't mind being in love with Jacob. Far from it.

Physically, he was a robustly proportioned specimen, and there finding him attractive was hardly difficult, but mentally and emotionally, Nessie felt surges of electrical wonder when they talked. Jacob could talk to her about anything in the entire universe and she would listen keenly, as if maybe they had talked about a thousand things a thousand times in along time ago, in another life, but that was something that didn't make any sense.

"My kind—well, it's practically encoded in our genetics to hate your kind," Jacob started in reluctant sheepishness, "but Bram Stoker's Dracula is one of my favorite movies of all time."

Nessie's mouth dropped dramatically, feigning utter astonishment. "Jacob Black! I am dismayed!"

"Chillax, Nessie. That's not the secret."

"Sorry. Continue."

"I never hated your father solely because he's a vampire," Jacob confessed.

"Oh, that was anti-climatic. I already knew that."

"What do you mean?"

"It was a convenient detail," she retorted nonchalantly and shrugged. "Because you were in love with my mother."

"Pretty much," the shape-shifter agreed. "God, I was a stupid kid."

"I'm very pleased that you can admit that part," Nessie replied, giggling gently at him.

Jacob nodded, grinning hugely so that his face was alit with happiness. "I thought it would, but if you mention I said anything, I will deny every word."

"My lips are sealed," Nessie said, zipping up her lips and tossed away the invisible key. She gently took a hold of his hand, tracing her fingernails across his knuckles. "Thank you for sharing that with me, my Jacob. I won't ever tell a living soul. You mean too much to me."

He licked his lips. "I guess now that I don't love her anymore, I can let go of my hate for Edward, too," Jacob admitted, and Nessie could have sworn that her heart became much warmer. She was proud of him. "I've let my past drag me down for too long. I'm ready to live in the present."

Nessie smiled. "That would be best, Jacob. It really would be. Hate is a terrible burden to carry around, a curse actually. That was Victoria's demise."

Now there was a story nobody could keep quiet about.

"Oh, yeah!" Jacob's fingers snapped in fond recollection. "That bloodsucker with the red hair! I remember her!"

And really, how the heck could he forget? Victoria was such a big chunk during the love triangle drama, but Nessie kept that to herself.

"I've only heard stories about that whole ordeal." Chaos. "Her mate was killed by my father—not that I don't think James didn't deserve it after trying to kill my mother," Nessie explained. She liked humans and didn't think they were inferior, unlike most vampires. Of course, she had a family to raise her to know right from wrong. James and Victoria must have been very different. "My father left her lonely in the world. She wanted revenge."

And maybe that wasn't something Nessie could totally blame Victoria for; Nessie didn't know what it was like to lose someone. Some people could move on with their lives, some people let their loss destroy them; some people would rather destroy others. Nessie couldn't have known how she would react in a situation similar to that. If she ever—if someone took away Jacob. . . She couldn't picture herself even existing. What was life without love?

However, Victoria should have known then. She might have loved James the way Edward loved Bella, and all he wanted to do was save her from James' thirst. It was James' own fault he died.

"An eye for an eye," Jacob remarked, sighing. "I think some people refer to it as justice."

"I suppose they do, but no matter what they call it—revenge is a dangerous business," Nessie replied. "But any person's life isn't a toy to be bought and traded, or terminated on a random whim or reason."

"I'm beginning to understand that," Jacob retorted matter-of-factually. "I guess in some ways, I'm no better than Victoria or a cartoon."

She shook her head in disagreement. "No, Jacob. What you were back then is not who you have come to be. You have changed, and still changing for the better. I can see that." He was gradually learning to leave his past in the past. "For a long time, that was my biggest fear. Hate."

Jacob's eyebrows kneaded together in bewilderment. "You? Why?"

"It's an evil, Jacob. It makes people mean. Hate is like a wildfire. It doesn't matter if you're smart, if you're dumb, if you're rich, if you're poor, if you have ever loved or not all, it's a trap. Hate is one of the biggest torments, and that scares me. Even self-hate is a destroyer," she elucidated, nervously twiddling her thumbs. "It had enough power to nearly split up my parents."

"Yeah, but he came back," Jacob kindly pointed out, not even a pinch of malice detected in his voice like Nessie partly anticipated. She was entirely grateful to whatever high power there was for that. He really didn't love Bella anymore. Thank goodness.

"Because of my mother's love," Nessie added in a tone of assurance. "Love saved his life, Jacob, and I think it can save anyone's life. Love is a healer." She paused. In a weird way, she supposed there were new things that she was learning about herself—she was a hopeless romantic. "Jacob, hate creates real monsters, and it can take so many forms—revenge, fear, jealousy. I don't want to become cruel."

No. She would rather fall asleep in a glass coffin, hands folded neatly over her stomach, and dream. To cause anybody grief—on purpose—was a sentence worse than death. A curse worse than death.

"Nessie," he spoke in a voice that conveyed sheer disbelief, cupping each blushing cheek in his warm hands to comfort some sort of her inner turmoil. "You can't really believe that you are capable of any sort of petty chaos. It's not possible."

"But even you said-"

"I said a lot of things," Jacob interrupted ruefully, shook his head and grimaced. "You are good, Nessie, too good for this world." Nessie soon found herself embraced protectively between his arms, her ear resting over the gently thrumming of his heartbeat. "I never thought my old scars would heal, or that I would even want them to. And then you happened to me."

"Oh, Jacob," Renesmee sighed affectionately, smiling softly. "My Jacob, you never needed me. I have nothing to do with-"

"No. You have everything to do with that," the man-wolf insisted fervently. "Thank you."

Those words seemed so backwards to Nessie. Jacob couldn't see that it had never been her. It was inside him all along, that goodness; he truly didn't need her. Honestly, it was her that should have been expressing gratitude, for listening and and being patient and comforting her. She loved Jacob all the more, and she wanted to show him in a number of different ways. Keeping it simple, however, Nessie kissed Jacob's chin.

"You always know what to say," Nessie said. "Thank you."

Jacob stood up then. "I have to go to the bathroom. I'll be right back."

Nessie flung a pillow at his butt. "What is your problem, Jacob? Haven't you ever seen a horror movie? Don't ever say that!"

In response, Jacob rolled his eyes and chuckled, throwing back the pillow. "Get a grip."

"Fine! I'm gonna go check the mail!"

"Good for you!"

The half-human half-vampire girl walked outside, the first time that day her pores had the chance to soak in the afternoon light—gray and cold. The day wasn't anywhere near beautiful, but not horrible either. Dozens of clouds covered the sky, an endless line of silvery purple mystique. A hint of sunlight peaked down on the trees neighboring Charlie's house.

Something seemed off, Nessie mused, and walked slowly over to one of the spruces. She noticed a heap of thin spikes lying down, a delicious scent filling the oxygen around them. The familiar burning tinged in the back of her throat, but the color of the spikes were laced in a red she knew all too well. Then , Renesmee took attention to a rough material crawling up her ankles. A rope. By then, it was too late, and everything went upside down.

"Jacob!"

* * *

><p><em>The half-human half-vampire's knees trembled frantically, leaning her weight against a wall. She tried to observe everyone else's movements to distract herself from the disarray surrounding the room.<em>

_Emmett and Rosalie were on the couch, holding on to one another in a tight embrace, as his thumb caressed the small of her back. Carlisle was busy flipping pages through dozens of books, full of information on Greek mythology and logic, but he kept shaking his head in discouragement. Esme sighed, watering the orchids and daisies in the mansion; that usually brought a smile to her face, but not today. Jasper tapped his foot against the hardwood floor, probably planning a proper course of action in a hopeless faith that Faethra was beatable. Alice stood with her husband, rubbing her hand up and down his arms, while her blackening irises darted around the living room. Bella sat on the wicker chair, alternating between chewing her nails and grinding her teeth. It was a slightly familiar sight, to see her mother consumed by worry. Edward paced back and forth across the length of the room, a torn expression written on his expression. His eyebrows kneaded together, his jaw pulled tensely tight. _

_(Meanwhile, a sparrow chirped outside; sparrows were one of Nessie's favorite animals. They were cute and small and curious.)_

_As for Jacob. . ._

_He stood on the opposite side of the living room, but he seemed like he was a solar system away. He just stared at the floor, avoiding eye contact with Nessie to hide his own worry. Honestly, Jacob was only a few feet away, but there was a vague absence about him that frightened her. Far away. Yes, that's what he was._

"_This is my fault," Nessie uttered, and suddenly all eyes were on her, including Jacob's. "If I hadn't killed the other hind, then we wouldn't be in this mess." Her voice shattered in odd places, her sights glued on her husband. "I am so sorry, Jacob."_

"_Don't be stupid." His tone was harsh and raspy, rolling his eyes and Nessie felt like a fool for no apparent reason. "Hypolita jumped the gun. She would have killed us both. You only acted in defense."_

"_But Faethra. . . She's so much stronger than me." Even stronger than Jacob. Faethra really should have killed both of them by now, but she was cruel. First, she would play her games. Then, she would strike. "She knows my biggest weakness. She'll use you to get to me, and it's going to work."_

"_No," Jacob growled. It seemed his eyes had darkened to a furious black-intense. "We won't let that happen."_

_Nessie wanted to shrink into the wall, feeling like a scolded child. She exhaled sharply, and stood frozen in place. "You can't be so sure."_

"_Yes, I can."_

"_Jake is right, sweetheart," Bella agreed, crossing the long space between them in a vampire second. "We're a family. There is no problem we can't solve as long as we stick together, Renesmee. We can fix this."_

"_You make it sound like someone has a broken arm," Nessie commented, screwing her expression in disgruntlement. "It's not that simple. My husband's life is in danger—all of us are! Why are we acting like I have a choice?" It was question made in dubiety; they were all in denial about what had to be done._

"_Because there is always a choice, and we are going to figure this out," Jacob replied immediately, glowering at his feet in a burning fury._

"_Have faith," Edward added._

"_But how?" Nessie queried desperately. "Faethra's blood can kill us all. If so much as a drop enters Jacob's bloodstream, none of us have the power to save him," And she wouldn't condemn him to a life of vampiracy when his kind hated them so much. "Except I-"_

"_Damn it, Nessie!" Jacob snapped, snarling like an infuriated animal. His fists balled, his knuckles turning chalk-white. "Don't you say it! Don't you even think it!" His dark eyes were entirely focused on his wife, his soul mate, but she could only think to mirror his frustration._

"_It's the truth!" she exclaimed, glaring back._

_A sudden, sharp gasp spilled out, halting the blood beginning to boil as they turned their attention to Alice. "Oh, my God!"_

"_No, Alice!" the mind-reader muttered incredulously. "It can't be!"_

"_But Edward, I saw her!"_

"_What?" Jacob demanded. "What did you see?"_

"_You won't like the answer." But when she spoke, her dark irises were on Nessie._

"_Me?" Renesmee inquired, lying a hand over her chest. "You saw me? How is that possible?"_

"_I don't know," Alice shrugged._

"_I thought you couldn't see Nessie because of her species," Bella said._

_Out of the blue, it was Emmett's turn to voice his opinion. "I always didn't find that to be a likely explanation," Emmett told everyone, and turned to Alice. Each Cullen listened with intrigue. "Alice, you were a human once, so you can see another human's future. You're a vampire, and you can see our future easily enough. Nessie isn't a totally new species, she's just half-and-half." Nessie blinked at her fun-loving uncle in confusion, consequently not comfortable in her own skin. "Maybe her future is blurry, but you should be able to catch glimpses."_

"_Did we enter an alternate universe? Were you being logical?" Jasper inquired jokingly, quirking an eyebrow in amusement. Even Rosalie smiled at that._

_Emmett shrugged, grinning smugly. "It happens."_

_Carlisle sighed, his jaw clenching in frustration and shoved yet another book back into its place on a shelf. "Then, there has to be another reason why Alice has never seen Renesmee before."_

"_She's always with Jacob," Rosalie said as though it was the most obvious thing in the world, and glanced betwixt the young newlyweds. "He's the blank in Alice's vision. When are they not together?" _

_Jacob shifted his weight from foot to foot in anxiousness, sliding a large hand down his face as he rolled his eyes at himself. And Nessie was aware was what going through his head—he was blaming himself._

"_Not always, Rosie," Bella commented. "If she was every away from him-"_

"_Alice should have been able to see Nessie," Edward concluded._

"_Unless. . ." Carlisle trailed off on the verge of an epiphany. "Maybe it was never about them being physically together, or in each other's company." This stole Jacob's attention. "Alice could never Renesmee, even before she was born, and Bella's future was temporarily invisible as well. Nessie's destiny even then was joined with Jacob's." _

_Was, being the operative word._

"_What?" Nessie mouthed to Jacob, the two exchanging perplexed glances._

"_Let me see if I'm following you here—Alice could never see Nessie because of me?" Jacob questioned. "Because of the imprint? Because of our future?" A singular future, because they were always supposed to be together._

"_Precisely," Carlisle nodded._

"_But if our futures are disconnected somehow, Alice has the ability has to see her future," Jacob finished, his lips parted slightly as he slowly tried to figure it out. "So, what you're saying is-"_

_Renesmee gulped, a million thoughts swimming around her head all at once. Alice had a vision of her, for the first time. The only time, and that had something to do with her destiny with Jacob, or rather her future decision to detach their destinies. "One of us is going to die."_

"_I'm sorry," Alice confirmed._

_Just like that, the world spun erratically as the space between her and Jacob widened, then froze. Nessie knew herself well enough to also know that there wasn't a bone in her body that would willingly leave Jacob; she would have to be forced to choose between his life and death—her death, but Alice never said. . . Jacob, too, had the power to separate their fate. _

_The hybrid took one step forward, her saddening eyes fixated on Jacob, but directed a question toward her seer aunt. "Who?"_

"_I just saw you crying, Nessie," Alice answered, refusing to look at her niece, but Nessie trusted her._

"_No!" Nessie choked on an oncoming sob. Her feet crossed the heavens and earth of the room. At the same time, in the same second, Jacob was holding her tightly in both arms as it would be their last time. She buried her face into his shirt, tenaciously hugging him. "Jacob!"_

"_Shhh, it's going to be okay, Nessie," Jacob promised, yet he had no real way of knowing. "I won't die."_

_Rescue me_

_Show me who I am_

_Because I can't believe that this is how the story ends_

_Fight for me_

_If it's not too late_

_Help me breathe again_

_No, this can't be how the story ends_


	32. Someday We'll Know

**Disclaimer: Nothing belongs to me, as always. Sadly. Why is this part really necessary. Song by Mandy Moore and Jonathan Foreman. **

_I bought a ticket_

_To the end of the rainbow_

_I watched the stars_

_Crash in the seas_

_If I would ask God just one question:_

_Why aren't you here with me_

_Tonight?_

"Jacob!"

Danger.

"Jacob!"

Screaming.

"Jacob!"

Somehow, it was all familiar.

"Jacob!"

No. Please be okay. Move faster!

Jacob lept out of Charlie's house in a nanosecond, his heart strangling around his throat as the half-human half-vampire screeched out his name frantically. He saw Nessie's ankles knotted, her entire body bouncing over a patch of thinly cut, sharp spikes. Her arms flailed about in an attempt to reach for safety that wasn't there. She was struggling to get free, but Jacob wasn't totally certain if the distinct tips could pierce her skin. Still, the adrenaline pumped violently through his bloodstream, the rhythm of his heart racing a mile a minute.

"Nessie!"

"Jacob!"

"Nessie! Shit! Nessie, are you okay?" he yelled back, and firmly grasped each end of her wrists in his large hands.

Jacob carefully reached up toward the rope, using his wolf abilities to jerk it and break the brown strands. When she fell loose, the shape-shifter immediately caught her safely in his arms.

She nodded, setting her feet on hard ground and released a relieved sigh. "Yeah, I'm fine, just pissed off!" Renesmee glowered at the forest floor, catching her breath, and knelt down carefully to examine the spikes, made from metal and trees. "These are covered in blood. It has to be poisonous. If I had only been a few pounds heavier, I would have been Nessie-on-a-stick."

Jacob huffed out an exhale, kicking the stupid spikes down and covered them in dirt. "Who the hell did this?"

"Who do you think, silly mutt?" a new voice retorted, rich and femininely alto.

The shadows of the trees emerged precariously. A golden figure stepped out, every centimeter beautiful and sharp. Her flaxen fur gleamed in the dull sunlight, her skin vaguely glimmering like a precious jewel. Long, straight, blonde hair cascaded over either shoulder, accenting the rigid horns atop her head, as her upper torso adorned golden armor to cover each breast.

It was undeniable that she was beguiling maleficent. This woman—this _thing_—wanted to kill Renesmee.

Over his dead body.

There was an air that intimidated Jacob, something about her that flared his protective instincts, and pushed Nessie back to shield her from the sure hazard situation they were forced into. He glared at the golden hind, who strode forward. Everything about her presence shrieked danger, and he wanted to get Nessie to safety.

"Stay away," Jacob growled warningly, his dark chocolate eyes transforming to black.

"My, my, my," the blonde deer teased, her voice raspy yet womanly, and the low noise further enraged the wolf. "You have quite the temper. I bet you would tear someone apart if they so much as look at you the wrong way. My sister, for instance. How does it feel when the predator becomes the prey? I imagine not so well."

"Who are you?" Nessie inquired, nervously holding on to Jacob's hand. He squeezed her palm, his stupidity and bravery renewing at her touch.

"Your blackest dream, dear girl. Faethra," she answered, crossing her arms over her chest. "It was your friend here that brutally murdered my innocent sister's young life, and now it is my turn to take away something he loves—you."

"Yeah?" Jacob asked dubiously. "Your innocent sister was about to kill Nessie."

"Lies!" Faethra shouted, her eyes hardening in fury.

"Sure, sure," the Quileute man rolled his eyes. "Keep telling yourself that. Whatever helps you sleep at night, lady." Jacob knew there would be no reasoning with this woman now that her mind set on achieving vengeance.

"You will pay dearly, Jacob Black," Faethra stated, her hooves brushing boredly at the dust and leaves. "You will seek mercy where there is none and I will seize my opportunity to blacken your world as you have mine."

"Lady, I think you need to find a psychiatrist," the shape-shifter snorted.

"Shut up!" Faethra ordered, roaring loudly, and the black crows soared out of their homes in a panic. "By my hand and when I so decide, you will lose everything."

She looked straight at Nessie, smiling maniacally. It was a look that chilled Jacob to the bone, one he would keep stored in the back of his mind until the day he died. In Faethra's dark gold orbs, there was an insane exultation—clouded in a lustful, hungry injustice aimed at the wrong person. It was the same look, he remembered vaguely, that he might have seen somewhere before. . . Victoria? No, no.

"Today is only the beginning of my sport. Just wait and see," she concluded, bearing her teeth.

The golden hind turned away, and she vanished in the blink of an eye—before Jacob could even react.

"Get back here, you coward!" Jacob called out, his entire body trembling ferociously as the sound of Faether's evil laughter echoed in the breeze. "Go back inside, Nessie!" he demanded.

"Don't tell me what to do!"

"Go! Now! I mean it!" The Alpha command shattered through his tone, but all Nessie did was jump back. With a sharp _trinhg!_, clothes tore apart and were turned into rags on the ground. A massive, russet wolf stood there, growling and snarling, before taking off into the darkness after Faethra.

He heard Nessie trying to beckon him to return, but the impulse forward was too strong. "Jacob!" her voice sounded through the forest, piercing the valves of his heart. For only a second, he wanted to go back, but the will to protect got the better of him. "Jacob, no! Wait! Hold on! Jacob, come back here!" Somewhere far behind him, Jacob sensed Nessie's footfalls quickly approaching. "Jacob!"

She sprinted after him, each footstep created in growing concern and frustration, jumping and hopping over fallen tree trunks in Jacob's chaotic trail.

From a distance, he roared and sneered at a golden hind that, for the life of him, he could not find, and he loathed being inadequate. Nessie was in danger, nothing else mattered—not his love, not his life, not his will. Just her. He would get that right this time. And so, Jacob's four paws charged forward in search for that dumb yellow butt. Although, fate would not have it that way.

In a mysterious matter he would never understand, the ground gave away under his weight and sent his body falling through a secret roof—a secret sanctuary.

* * *

><p><em>"Wow," the half-breed uttered in a stunned awe, her voice sounding thrice off the walls. Nessie was in an astonished tizzy, a huge smile etched across the most beautiful contours in the world. "We did it! I can't believe it!"<em>

_What exactly had they done? Jacob and Nessie, whilst working long and moneyless hours, rebuilt a chapel that was once in shambles. The young couple happened upon a broken down church a few months ago while searching for medicine leaves for Doctor Cullen; it was hidden below the trees and the dirt, abandoned and forgotten._

_When Jacob looked around, he saw a sad disaster, where there was graffiti along the back walls and the pews laid in a splintering pile everywhere. The whole sight was disheartening; but then, Nessie took his hand in hers and there was a sunny ray of hope in her beautiful brown eyes. She saw a place that could be healed, not a lost cause. Nessie could foresee lovely window pains with a humble, yet godly Carpenter, red wood walls decorated in green velvet, an aisle between pews that led the way to a white-silk alter; and that's exactly what the chapel had become. If Nessie saw hope, so would Jacob. It was hard not to believe in what she believed in, when she smiled at him and had faith._

_He wouldn't disappoint her; there was no way he would let her down, his Nessie._

_The work hadn't been easy, and from time to time, the two had needed some help, but it was something that they did together; a task that was definitely worth the trouble, in the end. The church turned out to be beautiful. That's when Jacob decided, somehow knew the time was right. Now, all he had to do was work up the guts._

_Easy, right?_

_"Ditto," Jacob agreed, running a hand over the smooth surface of one of the new church benches. He, Edward, Quil, Embry, and Emmett had spent at least two weeks on shaving fine oak trees into something that could be utilized as a seat while Nessie, Emily, Esme, Kim, and Rachel kept themselves busy with sewing blue cushioning. "We've really outdone ourselves on this one. Who knew?"_

_Nessie nodded. "It's almost as beautiful as our cliff on La Push." Jacob chortled at that, and he couldn't help but to be grateful when she said 'our.' Them. Together. The cliff was theirs. "Oh, Jacob, I love it!"_

_"And it only took us three months to finish it," the shape-shifter added casually. He felt that the timing deserved an honorable mention, as quick as they were—not that they had been in any rush. Recreating this church from the ground up had just become Nessie's passion, though not obsession. She just had the hands of an angel. Of course! It was in her nature to fix things, even things that seemed beyond repair to a disbeliever's eyes. And she had been right. But then again, she made everything seem easy._

_The half-human half-vampire twirled around, the ruffles on her yellow skirt swaying along with her giddy movements. Jacob knew that it was becoming increasingly difficult for her to contain her excitement. And why shouldn't she feel excited? "Just think about it, Jacob!" Nessie exclaimed jovially, but he didn't want to. His mind was preoccupied on a slightly more important matter, according to his heart. "We rebuilt a church! Someday, people can get married here—a woman in a gorgeous, sheik, white gown and men in matching tuxedos, music and flowers!"_

_"Have you spent the last three months dreaming that up?" Jacob inquired, arching an eyebrow at her playfully. Could his Nessie be anymore adorable? Of course, it seemed fair that her own fantasies would lead her to marriage. Still, he wondered if they, as newlyweds, had every crossed her mind. . ._

_"Absolutely," Renesmee answered, beaming at him. She was never afraid to where her heart on her sleeve. "I couldn't help myself, Jacob. This is a place of. . ." she trailed off, sighing in contentment. ". . .of love."_

_"I know," he nodded. "This is a pretty powerful place. I guess I kind of like the idea of other people standing at the alter."_

_Truthfully, Jacob wasn't a huge romantic when it came to anyone but Nessie, but he could understand why Nessie would want to build such an extraordinary church. To her, marriage was more than a signature on a contract or a promise made in obligation. Marriage was a sacred bond, a spiritual combining of two souls together for the rest of eternity. It was a vow made in true love and purpose. Love, in its simplistic nature, created passion, strength, and destiny. In believing this, Nessie was also aware that people usually rushed down the aisle, having barely known each other for five minutes, and treated marriage like an institution based on carnal pleasures and nothing._

_"I truly believe that this place is lucky," Nessie said, and Jacob believed it, too—naturally. "Any couple married here are sure to be soul mates." She turned around, gazing toward the huge, pink heart painted over the alter. "As corny as it is—everlasting love, you know? Soul mates, Jacob, they're around each other every day, but they rarely find each other. Only the lucky ones will make it here."_

_"We're soul mates," Jacob stated matter-of-factually, grinning suggestively at her._

_"Yes, we are," Nessie replied. Although, Jacob couldn't see her face at the moment, he knew she was smiling that smile his heart couldn't resist. She was probably chewing her bottom lip and fiddling with her promise bracelet. "Ever since you told me, I've hard a hard time believing that—in the best way possible."_

_"And you know, we built this church up together," Jacob said, his voice trembling lightly._

_He had to caution himself from collapsing into a puddle of wolfy nerves right now, but he was more afraid than he had ever been in his life. It was Nessie that had all the power here._

_"Yes, Nessie agreed, exhaling a sigh made in wonderment and affection. "We did, and that is how you and I should do everything—together." He loved the sound of that. "You don't know how grateful I am to you that you actually went along with all of this for my sake. You're the best."_

_No, Nessie, no, Jacob mentally cautioned his imprint. She wasn't playing fair; she was trying to get him all choked up so he couldn't say this next part, but damn it, he had to. Jacob was ready, and had been ready for a long time now. He was preparing himself for the worst, as per usual, but he hadn't prepared himself for melting at the sweet, angelic sound of Nessie's voice. Nessie had an affect on him that he swore would never change—in one word, Jacob loved her and would always love her._

_No time would change that fact—not ten thousand days, not ten thousand years. No time would kill the butterflies—or rather bumble bees—in his stomach. Nessie would always remain the love of his life, come high or hell water, and he just wanted to prove that to her._

_"Nessie," Jacob managed to get out her name easily enough, "I would do. . ." Say it. You're so close. Just say it. How hard could it be? "I would do anything for you, even walk countless times around this entire earth if you never wanted to see me again, but you know, I actually enjoyed fixing something over than motorcycles and cars." That was pretty true. Granted, Jacob loved working as a mechanic, working with tools and auto parts, and then getting messy, but this was some clean work. It was nice change, to create something stunning. "This gave me a chance to break my routine, try something different." Everything about Nessie was different. "It was nice, and it got me thinking."_

_"I hope you didn't hurt yourself," the hybrid girl-woman glanced over her shoulder, a playful smirk buttering her gorgeous features, and winked in jest._

_"Fine, be that way. Maybe I won't tell you what I was thinking, you little twerp."_

_No, no, no, no! This was no time to chicken out. He could do this. He had to. But why was he so damn scared? Nessie wouldn't completely reject; she assured him over a hundred thousand times that she loved him just as much as he loved her (not that he could ever be entirely certain), but. . . One word could either make or break his day, and maybe there was a big chance she still wasn't ready yet. A fify percent chance, to be more exact._

_"Aw, Jacob, don't be like that." She turned around to face him. There was a smile written across the strawberry colors of her mouth, and that was all it took for Jacob to regain (if he ever gained any at all) bravery, or possibly, stupidity. "You know I want to hear anything you have to say. Please? Please, tell me what you've been thinking about, Jacob," Nessie fluttered her eyelashes flirtatiously, linking their arms._

_The shape-shifter was gladly captured in those milk chocolate irises, lost in the hazelnut forest, and the simplest, most obvious words just would not form. Jacob was too happy just to be staring at her, and he didn't want to ever look away. She was like a freshly painted canvas; porcelain skin, coppery tendrils, shell-pink lips, but the artist must have spent a lifetime on Renesmee's complexly colored, gentle eyes. If Jacob so much as grazed a thumb across the soft-shaped, lemonade-pink cheeks, the artwork surely smudge miserably._

_Her voice rang through like Notre Dame bells through his inner-mind and brought him back to Earth. "Jacob? Jacob, are you still with me? Hello!"_

_"Huh. . . ? What? Oh. Sorry, Nessie. Anyway, okay. I'll tell you, but just because you're so freaking adorable," Jacob grinned, teasingly rolling his eyes. "I've been thinking about this since the church has been turning out so nicely, we could build a lot of other great things." A life, a love, a family._

_"I don't understand," Nessie retorted shyly, tilting her head sideways, but there was inevitable knowledge concealed in the jade flecks of her eyes._

_"Yes, I think you do," Jacob replied, and gently grasped his imprint's wrists as his dark chocolate orbs stared into her milk chocolate ones. Renesmee's smile faded into confusion, her face flushing bright cerise. "The thing is, Nessie—I'm in love with you. I would be in love with you even without the imprint. And this—us—we feel right together." That was how it shall be forevemore. There was not any other way he wanted to live. She was the only path that Jacob's heart knew how to follow. "I want," Jacob gulped and then sighed. "I need to officially belong with you for the rest of our lives. I want to dedicate mine to make you happy."_

_"Jacob. . ."_

_"Don't, Nessie," he warned her quickly. Jacob already knew what she was going to say, that he already made her happy, but he had to say this. "Let me finish, please?"_

_"Okay, Jacob." She nodded._

_"I also think it would be very fitting that the two people who brought this church back to life should also be the first to get married in it." Jacob shoved a hand inside his pocket as gravity forced him to both knees, and presented Nessie with a black velvet box. He opened it, and in the box was a modest ring. It wasn't bought from a fancy jewelry store, but constructed from red, brown, copper, white, and green leather strands, similar to Renesmee's bracelet; but there was also a diamond trapped in the center of the ring—no more than four carats. "Bottom line, Nessie—will you marry me?"_

_Those beautiful milk chocolate eyes glazed over with tears, but she nodded vigorously. "Yes."_

_"You will?" Jacob asked incredulously. "Are you serious?"_

_"Yes, Jacob," Nessie giggled, nodding again. "There is nothing I would rather do than be your wife."_

_"Really?" Jacob queried, standing up from the ground. Hundreds of electrical charges pulsated through his bloodstream as the stars combined with the sun. There was no way this was happening, that this was his life—Nessie agreed to marry him. By far, the best thing the best decision Jacob could have ever made was finally working up the nerve to ask Nessie to spend the rest of their lives together. God, he couldn't even remember why he was apprehensive of asking or what took him so long, but either way he answer was yes._

_"Uh-huh," Nessie exhaled sharply, tears of joy springing to her beautiful face. In instant response, Jacob's stomach twisted crazily; and for a second, he wasn't sure if he would ever breathe or sleep again. His body could have exploded from the onslaught of sheer jubilation—as if it was Christmas morning or as if they had already exchanged vows. All they needed now was a real wedding. "I have dreamed of us so many times, and it's going to be real!"_

_He momentarily rested his thumbs on either cheek, and then caressed away the tears._

_Jacob gently slipped the diamond ring on Renesmee's dainty finger. His arms wrapped around her slender waist, as her feet arose from the floor. The shape-shifter man and half-human half-vampire woman spun around until they were the most beautiful sort of dizzy. Jacob chuckled and Nessie giggled, burying her face into the nape of his neck. He kissed every inch of Nessie's face—her nose, her cheeks, her earlobes, her forehead, her chin, and finally, her lips. Vibrant, vivacious colors burst into the wide space, their breaths mingling as their mouths massaged each others in a needy fervor. It was one, mere kiss, yet it left both almost completely breathless._

_"Woohoo!" the Native American exclaimed, finally setting her down; but he held her closer than he had ever before, because he had never been so mortified of losing his imprint, that she might disappear into thin air. "I love you, I love you, I love you. I love you, Nessie! I can't wait to freakin' marry you, and I swear that my life is yours. There isn't anything I can ever do to repay you, but I can start by giving you the wedding of your dreams. I love you."_

_"Good,because my dream wedding is you. I don't care about anything else," the half-breed replied, tapping her index finger. "You have to love me forever. There is no other way."_

_"I'm yours, Nessie," Jacob promised with a gentle smile. "I love you."_

_"I love you, too, Jacob. My Jacob. Forever," Nessie pursed her lips, and Jacob had stifled his own tears. He would not cry, he would not cry, he would not cry. He had some dignity to maintain._

_"You are stuck with me, Nessie," Jacob said, entangling their pinkies._

_Someday we'll know_

_If love can move a mountain_

_Someday we'll know_

_Why the sky is blue_

_Someday we'll know_

_Why I wasn't meant for you_

_Someday we'll know_

_Why Samson loved Delilah_

_One day I'll go_

_Dancing on the moon_

_Someday we'll know _

_That I was the one for you _


	33. Shake It Out

**Disclaimer: Nothing belongs to me. Seriously? Don't sue. That wouldn't be coolio, dawg. Actually? That would be craycray. Don't do that. Song by Florence and the Machines.**

**Author's Note: I can't honestly say that I finally saw 'Snow White and the Huntsman' and 'Mirror Mirror,' and in my opinion, the far superior Snow White is. . . Wait for it. . . ! It's still Ginnifer Goodwin who plays Snow White in 'Once Upon a Time.' No joke. Not only does she play the character with many flaws that I would find annoying on any other show, but she makes them pleasant whether she has her short pixie haircut or long hair. And that ends my fangirl rant. Moving on!**

* * *

><p><em>And I am done with this graceless heart<em>

_So tonight I'm gonna cut it out_

_And then restart_

_'Cause I like to keep my issues drawn_

_It's always darkest before the dawn_

_Resounding shouts bounced off every inch of the chapel's remaining walls. The stained glass windows had been punched, glass shards scattered everywhere; wood rested in messy piles on the ground, as the pews were still being thrashed around. The church, once a standing miraculous wonder, was now once again mere shambles. _

_By Jacob's angered strength, the place was a disarray. _

_Everything was a reminder of what Jacob had and could never have again. He was pissed off, angry at the entire universe, and he hated her for deserting him like this. A destructive monster was unleashed, demolition was inevitable. He wouldn't stop until this place became debris, smashing the statues into the walls and flung them out of the windows—a reflection of the torment tornadoing inside his body. All the while, one word rang in the forbidden prison of his mind: why?_

_Why did she do this?_

_Why she possibly think he could possibly go on living without her?_

_Why?_

_It wasn't fair. He was too weak to handle this on his own. Jacob needed his wife, his Nessie, to mend his cracking soul._

"_Jacob, stop!" Seth yelled at the Alpha. "You have to calm down!" he implored desperately. "Both of you worked hard on this place!"_

_Worked hard? For what? To see it all crumble to the ground, anyway? At this point, Jacob was only speeding up the process._

"_Don't you fucking tell me to calm down, Seth!" the Alpha snarled commandingly, pushing his friend away. He knew very well what this chapel meant to Renesmee, but it didn't matter anymore. There was no point to preserving what was meant to die alone in despair. "Damn it! She said, 'Forever!' She promised me and she lied! She lied to me!"_

_Why?_

_Why did she have to go?_

_A new surge of chemical ire electrocuted his fury, ramming his fist through a wall, bending the pipes, and then pulled back. His knuckles were blanketed in dust and blood, boiling on the surface of his skin. The pain reminded him that this wasn't just a terrible nightmare, but in fact, his doomed reality. It wasn't enough. He healed in mere seconds, but all he wanted to do was disappear into deep space, to float into nothing and explode. _

_Why?_

_Why couldn't he have made it on time to stop her from getting herself killed?_

"_Shut up," Rosalie sneered, hugging her knees close to her chest warily, trying to grapple for a sound piece of mind. _

"_Fuck off," Jacob replied hostilely. _

_The fair-haired vampire female, in a second, had given Jacob a good punch in the gut. He cried out, feeling his throat run dry, and coughed. "Don't you dare," she growled precariously in Jacob's ear, "make the mistake of thinking you're the only one here who lost someone. I loved Nessie as if she were my own daughter! And I will be damned if I let you turn all of her memories into ruins! For goodness sake, what the hell else do you have left of her, dog?" Rosalie demanded, stifling a dry sob._

_What memories did he need? Everything around him was a reminder of Renesmee—the church, her family, her friends, the sweet scent on the wind—a reminder that he would never again touch her, hold her, or kiss her again. _

"_She's right, Jacob," Seth added softly._

"_No!" Jacob's stomach churned in sickening agony, collapsing to the ground upon his knees and buried his wet face into his hands. Rosalie emitted a long, flat sigh, and rested a cold hand on his shoulder, but it only made his feel even worse. Nothing he, or anyone else, did would bring Nessie back, and he was hurting the lowest he had ever hurt. He didn't want to live in the world if he didn't have Nessie. "No," he growled, a man crumbling into a big baby. That's all he was now. His heart screamed out in pain; his soul wailed a mournful song. "Nessie left me! She left me alone! How could she even think that I could handle this on my own? She never even thought of what I would do without her. Why? Why! Why did you leave, Nessie?"_

_From his soul to his heart, from his feet to his hands, from his knees to his face, Jacob's body curled up tightly as his stomach began to cave, and rocked himself back and forth—a broken prayer. He didn't want to deal with any of it. _

"_Jacob, Renesmee died because she loved you," Rosalie began gently, the kindest she had even been with him. Shockingly, that fact didn't make him feel any better. What was Rosalie trying to say? That if Nessie hadn't fallen into a trap of love with Jacob, she would still be alive? Actually, that would have been the correct assumption. Nessie was dead because of love. Stupid, fucking love. "We both know you would have done the same for her. That is not something to take for granted."_

"_It doesn't matter. It just doesn't matter anymore. She's gone." His voice sprained along with the rest of his heart._

"_Jacob. . ." Rosalie murmured much like Renesmee would have to him, twisting her fingers in his hair gently. "Jacob. . ."_

. . . Remember me, Jacob, and come back to me. . .

. . . I can't do this, Nessie. I can't do this alone, without you. . .

. . . You don't have to. . .

. . . I miss you so much. . .

. . . But I'm right here. Jacob, please, wake up! It's the only way. I love you. Breathe for me. Open your eyes. . .

. . . I don't want to. . .

. . . For me, Jacob. . .

. . . Nessie. . .

"_What am I supposed to do?" Jacob cried, blazing tears staining each copper cheek until they were sure to disintegrate off. His muscles lazed feebly, accepting Rosalie's attempt to soothe him. It wasn't worth it to fight her away, when the fight in him was lessening by the second. The anger in his soul was transforming to dampened, mere sorrow as tears streamed down his face._

. . . Listen to me, my Jacob. You must wake up. I should have never. . .

* * *

><p>There was hand upon his head, delicate fingers running through his soft, russet pelt as his dream world vanished in and out of sight. Day was becoming clearer and clearer, his eyes opening to the dangerous reality at the voice's gentle plea. Porcelain features, as soft as the sweet moonlight, seemed too familiar, as if he had gazed upon this face a thousand times before.<p>

God, she was beautiful, probably an. . . An angel? Her gentle voice, easy and feminine and resounding in the chambers of his heart, revived him with a soft melody. But there was a mystery to this angel's more-than-apparent beauty, not dark or light, but of a hazard nature.

Remember. . .

Remember what?

Jacob wanted to, he started to, if he had any clue was he was supposed to be remembering. Somewhere way deep down in his soul, Jacob knew the voice that was beckoning him back to her. Although, she was the same voice that never once responded to his heart's call. Why should he answer hers?

Except that he was still alive. Except that he wanted to tell her that everything was going to be all right. Except that he needed her. Jacob needed Nessie, and that's the way it always was—before.

"Jacob," the angel spoke. Her hand stroked his metamorphosing snout, changing to his normal face. "Jacob, can you hear me? Jacob. . ."

It hadn't even taken him a second to remember her name. "N-Nessie?" the shape-shifter stammered as his vision of Renesmee Cullen came into full view. The next part he whispered, so low that Nessie wouldn't have been able to hear him, "A dream. A nightmare." Any existence without her was terrifying. "Nessie!"

She sighed in relief, and gently stood up with him. "Thank goodness." Nessie caged Jacob up in her arms, embracing him tenaciously. In turn, Jacob realized two things—he was naked and standing in the most random place, a church.

He hugged her back, feeling every fiber of his being healing here in the warmest proximity. "Nessie?" Jacob inquired in confusion. Although, his brain was lost still in a dream reality, as he was slowly trying to gain consciousness in this world. "Nessie, what hap-"

"Are you okay?" the hybrid inquired, her patience quickly running empty.

"Yeah," was his answer of uncertainty. "I'm great."

"Good," Nessie replied, and thumbed away small droplets from her eyes. "If you ever scare me like that again, I will kick your ass from here to kingdom come." Jacob chuckled at her playful threat. "We need to get you some clothes. Faethra could be heading anywhere and we need to get to La Push to warn everyone."

"Right," Jacob agreed.

. . .

Maybe going to Leah's apartment first wasn't the brightest idea on Jacob's part. Once they were done explaining every last detail of the afternoon's events to her, it was only natural for Leah to blow up like a Macy's Day Parade balloon.

"What!" she bellowed. "Ren, are you okay?" Her concern leaked through her stern expression, embracing his Nessie in a way that made Jacob want to roar possessively at Leah.

His.

There was no need to grab her so closely. Seriously, there wasn't currently any danger present. Leah could just relax.

"Yes, Leah," Nessie replied in an affection amusement, hugging Leah in a sisterly fondness, and smiled warmly. "I'm in one piece. I'm fine."

"Are you sure," Leah inquired.

"Positive," Nessie nodded, sighing in exhaustion. Jacob could sympathize. She shouldn't be forced to explain her state of being to Leah, who should trusted her imprint more, or have at least known for herself.

"Don't lie to me, Ren," Leah pleaded. "If that bitch left any marks on you, I'll rip her fucking limb from fucking limb."

It was a bizarre experience to watch these two women interact as friends, let alone imprints. Something about them appeared off to Jacob, probably because it seemed that Leah selfishly depended so much on Nessie for assurance and comfort, rather than the other way around. There was a word for people like Leah. . .

Clingy.

"Overdramatic much, Lee?" Nessie joked, poking Leah in her ribs. "Seriously? Look at me, Leah. Not even a hair harmed. Don't I look okay to you?" she teased, giving Leah an award winning smile as if to say that she was invincible. Of course. Leave it to Nessie to act all charming and adorable after a near brush with death. No big deal.

It only made Jacob love her even more.

Leah glowered sourly at Renesmee, causing Jacob to take an instinctive stride forward. "Don't you dare get cheeky with me, little runt. Wait until your parents find out.. They are going to flip!"

The half-human half-vampire grimaced as though she didn't agree with that idea, and neither did Jacob. "Oh, no! Leah, not if we don't tell them! They don't actually have to know, do they?"

"Yes, Ren, they do," the she-wolf answered matter-of-factually, and then turned her attention to Jacob after what seemed like a century of staying absolutely silent. Leah's index finger shot out at him, pointing in condemnation. "And you!"

Jacob gestured to himself. "Me?"

"Yes!" Leah growled at him, nodding at him as if that fact was obvious. "This is all your fault! Y-Y-You were supposed to be watching her! That thing could have killed her!" she yelled, blaming him.

"Hey, there is no need to point fingers," Nessie stated, carefully lowering Leah's index finger as if it was a loaded rifle.

"I'm doing the best I can," Jacob stated back, mirroring his former beta's icy glare, locking his jaw in place.

"Your best will get her murdered," Leah retorted fiercely.

"Leah!" the half-breed scolded.

"I knew Edward and Bella made a mistake by letting you protect Renesmee." Leah emitted a viscous laugh, observing Jacob as a little girl would a spider—with fear and disgust. "If you had it your way, she would be shish kabob right now."

This conversation was strongly beginning to grate on Jacob's nerves. It was worse than trying to reason with Bella. Whereas he could at least attempt to butter Bella up with stone-cold sense, Leah was ever-stubborn in her protection over Nessie. Worse, honestly, probably because of their connection to each other, as if she was under some order to serve and protect her young imprint. He couldn't crack Leah. She was a force of nature all on her own, and perhaps she had an influence over the young hybrid that he wouldn't be able to comprehend, yet it mattered to him.

Jacob didn't want Leah to disillusion Nessie into believing that her safety wasn't the most important issue to him, because it was. She was. If the whole world was shouting at her that he wasn't some crook, would she eventually listen?

Maybe he needed Leah's approval, and Bella's.

Maybe that was impossible.

"Just shut up, Leah!" His voice boomed thickly at the other shape-shifter, his temper flaring to the point of trembling. No, he wouldn't phase. He couldn't phase. Nessie was too close. "I care about Nessie."

"Yeah, you care about her so much that you're willing to let her get slaughtered by some blonde bitch with a bad attitude!" Leah shouted at him, with her fists planted firmly on either hip. "Do you want to tell us something, Jacob? Are you in cohorts with Faethra?"

That accusation nearly sent Jacob over the edge. It hurt mostly because a few days ago, that wouldn't have been such a bad idea, but now that had all changed. All he could think about was protecting Nessie. "No, of course not," he yelled back.

Nessie wedged herself between Leah and Jacob's hot bodies, resting one hand on her imprinter's shoulder and the other over Jacob's heart. The two wolf-humans sharply exhaled in a momentary, fleeting tranquility. "Guys, guys, guys! Chill out!" she interjected, glancing back and forth at them. "Leah, stop antagonizing Jacob. He saved my life twice already. No one forced him to."

Instinctively, Jacob reached up his hand, rubbing his nimble digits tenderly over his Nessie's knuckles. "I really am trying for you, Nessie."

At his words, the girl-woman smiled, and nodded. "I know, Jacob. I know."

"Are you crazy?" Leah whispered-yelled in repulsion. "Or maybe you're just plain stupid nowdays! He isn't enough to survive on. Ren, you should stay on La Push with me for a little while. It's safer." She tried to grab on to Nessie's hand, who immediately jerked it back.

"No! Leah, stop trying to control me! I won't be responsible for getting everyone killed!" Nessie exploded, looking similar to a caged lioness and ready to attack whoever she had to at the chance of breaking free. "I trust the Alpha."

"Sam is the Alpha," Leah corrected with a snarl, her brown irises blackening as she stared between Jacob and Nessie. Her tone cautioned the eight year-old girl to take a step back, away from Jacob, but Nessie, being Nessie after all, refused.

"Jacob is the rightful Alpha, and was yours once, too," Nessie reasoned, stamping her foot and criss-crossing her arms over her chest.

Her gaze turned to Jacob. In those milk chocolate orbs of her delicious eyes, there was faith—a faith in Jacob—that was much more than Jacob deserved. Being an alpha was like being born a noble, but one could not be simply born into a title, or even a destiny. He knew that he had to earn the right as alpha—prove himself—and that task was too hefty for him.

But Nessie might have seen something in him that he was blind to himself, or perhaps it was finally time Jacob start to have a little faith.

"Until he abandoned me and Seth," Leah countered, shaking her head, and Jacob rolled his eyes. Was there anything she could just leave in the past? "Some Alpha," she snorted. "He'll leave you behind, too, the first chance he gets to bail."

"I will protect Nessie," Jacob assured, saying so crisply.

Lear jeered, smiling ear-to-ear in a sarcastic disposition. "And look where that has gotten her so far—on somebody's shit list." Jacob swallowed back a dry lump of air, guilty. "Just back off, Jacob. She's my imprint, not yours."

"Please, Leah, you're the one that needs to back off!" Nessie exclaimed, glaring in a very Edward-like manner. "I love you. You're like my older sister, but the past is over and done with. Don't close yourself to Jacob's goodness because you feel wronged."

"Jacob is a little boy," the female wolf mocked, chortling, and Jacob felt his gut knot up tightly. "He is reckless and careless." She furrowed a long, black eyebrow. "The only reason why you're not seeing clearly is because you're attracted to him. You're not being smart, Ren," Leah stated. Now, she was breaching the subject too far.

"Our relationship is none of your business," Jacob spat, grinding his teeth together impatiently and he let out a long huff. "The Cullens chose me to protect Nessie and that's what I'm doing." He was dying to phase and rip Leah apart.

"What a splendid job you're doing, by the way," Leah nodded at him, shrugging in feigned nonchalance. "I'm sure they will be tickled silly when they learn what nearly happened today."

"What is with the hostility, Leah? Jealous?"

"Don't make me laugh. Ha-ha," Leah rolled her eyes. "You're nothing but a big joke. You'll be gone the moment things get a lot more serious, and Ren will the one that is made to suffer from your stupidity."

The room fell into an awkward silence. Following after was a symphony of nails scratching against skin, tired sighs, feet tapping against the floor, and gulps. Renesmee gently grasped her delicate hand around Jacob's wrist, this time for her own comfort, which he was only happy to give her.

"I wish I could make you understand this, but I can't. I just feel safe with Jacob," Nessie explained dreadfully, shaking her head. "I. . . him. . ."

"But, Ren-"

"If you can't trust his judgment, then trust mine."

"Ren, you're still so young and naïve. Jacob isn't some knight in shining armor."

"I don't want him to be."

"Look, we're wasting time arguing over this," Jacob spoke. He didn't want to upset Nessie any further, and they needed to get down to business. "The yellow butt could attack anytime. We could all be in danger. We need to prepare."

_Spoken like a true Alpha, _the crossbreed smile warmly, pushing her thoughts through the contact of their porcelain to copper skin.

"Hold your horses, useless. The rest of the pack is coming," Leah informed Jacob bitterly.

"Name-calling is an elementary school tactic," Jacob shot back coolly. He would not let Leah get the better of him.

"Go blow yourself."

"Grow up, Leah."

"Right after you."

There was a loud knocking on Leah's apartment door, along with a new scent—familiar, like Nessie's, but strange to Jacob. The scent was strongly musky, combined in sweat and the jungle. Then, another knocked sounded, while Nessie groaned in complaint.

"Oh, Leah, you didn't!" Nessie whimpered, though her feet were already dragging toward the door.

Leah nodded, smiling smugly—pleased with herself. "It's the only way to make you see reason."

"I don't want reason. I want Jacob."

Nevertheless, the door flung open. Instantly, Nessie's feet were forcefully lifted off the ground, laughing as another man hugged her too closely for Jacob to be comfortable with.

"Renesmee!"

"Nahuel. . ."

_And I'm ready to suffer_

_And I'm ready to hope_

_It's a shot in the dark_

_Aimed right at my throat_

_'Cause looking for heaven_

_For the devil in me_

_But what the hell?_

_I'm gonna let it happen to me_

* * *

><p><strong>AN: Don't be too harsh with Leah, gals. She doesn't know why she's being so mean to Jacob either, she just knows that she has to protect Nessie because of A) the imprint and B) Jacob gave her specific orders to keep him away from Nessie, if they should meet again.**


	34. Dare You to Move

**Disclaimer: Nothing belongs to me. It never will. I have accepted this, you should, too. No lawsuits, pweeze! Anywhozzles, this song is by Switchfoot. **

**Author's Note: First and foremost, the new Breaking Dawn trailer... SQUEE! Secondly, I'm thinking of starting a new fic (when I finish this one, of course) that either may feature a nine year-old Jacob Black, post-his mother's death, falling in puppy love with a seemingly eight year-old Nessie, involving a lot of time travel, and would also include a future Nessie. OR, perhaps another alternate reality fic that would be a crossover between Twilight and Abduction. Which do ya'll think sounds better?**

**Anywho, on with the show! R&R**

_Welcome to the fallout _

_Welcome to resistance_

_The tension is here_

_Between who you are_

_And who you could be_

_Between how it is_

_And how it should be_

Twice.

Twice, Bella had felt her womb swell with brand new life, aching for freedom. Twice, Bella had been forced to listen to Edward refer to their baby as an abomination, a monster, an 'it.' Twice, Bella had to experience endless days of excruciating pain—bones crashing together and then cracking apart. Twice, Bella felt everything inside of her shuttering, only for a brief second to see a glimpse of the most beautiful person in the world. Twice, Bella's bloodstream seized to flow, with a fiery coldness running through her.

In her head, there wasn't a shadow of a doubt what Bella would do to ensure her daughter's life. She would go through it all twice, nineteen, a thousand, or however many times necessary to see Renesmee walk, talk, dance, and breathe. On the other hand, the last thing Bella wanted to do was lose her precious daughter—twice.

Once.

Once, Bella had noticed the willful intensity of her daughter's pull toward Jacob, felt the connection for herself from within her belly, when Jacob stormed out of the Cullen house, and knowing this time—in this life—he wouldn't come back. Once, Bella had felt a piece of her daughter's heart break little by little with each of his footsteps out of the door, begging and crying for him to return—despite not even being born yet.

Only once, did Bella ever regret her decision to keep her former best friend's secret.

But it hadn't mattered to Jacob or Nessie in eight years. Jacob had moved on with his life and Nessie had the opportunity to live out a completely new one. Granted, every now and then, Renesmee would grow curious and ask dozens of questions about him. The only harm Bella wanted to do was plant seeds of uncertainty by telling Renesmee the whole story—of when the lion and lamb fell in love, of Victoria, of her friendship with Jacob, of the real reason why he left. Because of her. She hadn't said those things to be evil; Bella had her reasons.

Could Nessie sense the absence of Jacob's presence in this new world?

Could a piece of her heart still yearn for him?

Could she possibly love him still?

She wanted Nessie to hate Jacob, just in case he ever did come along. And he did, eventually—because they were meant to be together. Bella's dead heart froze when she had to yell at Renesmee, to want to deny her true love, but what else could a mother do?

Could she allow her daughter to die again?

Jacob, the real Jacob—if he knew what was bound to happen—wouldn't have even come near Nessie again.

That's why knowledge could be one heavy burden.

"Edward," Bella murmured, finally shattering one of the most uncomfortable silences in history, as the couple stared out into the forest, "do you really think we can trust Jacob Black with our daughter's life?"

It was a genuine question. Perhaps in the previous lifetime, Bella wouldn't have questioned Jacob, yet here they stood all over again. Nessie had already died before. Why should Jacob's love prevail now?

"I do, love," Edward answered evenly, turning the page to some Greek Mythology book he was reading. She doubted he would have been so damn matter-of-fact if he knew the truth. "I have seen into his mind."

"Yet not into his heart," she added, giving him an ironic, cold laugh.

"Be that as it may," Edward began, shutting the book closed and set it down on a shelf, "I know that he cares for Renesmee in a way that all sorts of people long to care about another person."

Bella didn't need to hear that. She already knew what that mutt felt for Renesmee, of what she felt for him in return; it's what she died for.

"Jacob would probably lay down his life for Renesmee. Okay, not probably. Jacob would most definitely take a bullet to the heart for Nes-" he gulped audibly when Bella shot daggers at him with her pitch-black orbs, "Renesmee. . . You have to admit that's a cute nickname. Anyway, he's in love with her. I don't know why he won't tell her, though."

Bella knew. Of course, she knew. She always knew. Jacob knew, too, at least subconsciously, what Nessie's fate was if they became too serious. If he ruined their chances at being together, it could mean Nessie would live in this life. There had to be some memories there, tucked away in his mind.

Struggling not to rip her hair out, Bella ran her strong digits through her mahogany locks as an eyebrow furrowed. "Oh, I know he does." Duh. "It's as clear as day on his face,whenever he looks at her."

Edward chuckled, and that was enough to get Bella to smile somewhat. Over a thousand different times, Bella practically ached to tell Edward the truth, even at the risk of sounding insane. He deserved to know that there was a very real chance history could repeat itself, didn't he? But there was a price of knowing.

After all, in this weird reality, exactly how many times had she spent flipping through pages in a hidden photo album?

Countless times.

"He absolutely cannot understand why he is so attracted to her—or how, for that matter," Edward remarked jovially, almost the complete opposite of the way a father should react; but alas, he was happy for Jacob and Renesmee. At heart, he was a soft-spirited romantic, just the same as his daughter. "Dare I say it? His love for Renesmee rivals mine for you—almost," he winked. Bella almost hated him for being so charming in a situation like this. She knew Edward was simply trying to cheer her up, but his efforts weren't entirely enough. "Jacob is a good man."

"I can't believe that after all these years, Jacob just shows up to fall in love with Renesmee," Bella commented shaking her head while pondering how much time she and Edward had left with their daughter.

God, she hated this.

She hated having to get a tight grip on all these pent up feelings; she hated having to keep the truth to herself; she hated have to live with the memory of holding Renesmee's cold body close as the heavy rain poured down. Most of all, she hated not knowing if she cold hold Nessie's past husband, possibly ex-husband, accountable.

Of course, Faethra was mostly to blame, but Jacob should have known better.

At first, Bella didn't really blame Jacob—couldn't really blame him. Nessie knew what she was doing; Nessie had it all planned out; Nessie drugged Jacob; Nessie did everything she did out of love. But eight years is a lot of time to think, to contemplate, to muse over all the things that could have changed. Deleting Jacob entirely out of the problem seemed to be the solution—though only sometimes, though.

Other times, she remembered nobody could relate to Nessie quite like Jacob.

Oh, sure. Nothing had changed that much. Renesmee kept all her of close friends within the pack, even gaining a sisterhood with Leah Clearwater. Similar to the original reality, Nessie spent hours on La Push with her alleged imprinter, won the hearts of over a dozen people that should have hated her, and stayed in Forks for a few years to get to know her Grandpa Charlie.

The only, real, vital modification was merely that Jacob was missing in her life. If one thing was ever clear to Bella, it was that Nessie didn't need Jacob to survive, but maybe to live.

Whatever the case, as a mother, Bella couldn't help but notice the void in her daughter's existence. There would be days where Renesmee's smile wasn't nearly as bright as it normally was; there would be days where nobody was there to console her through the growing pains; there would be days where she lacked in true love.

And everyone needed true love.

"What a cruel irony," the female vampire concluded, over several vampire seconds of quiet.

"In a way I can't deny, they make sense."

"Yeah," Bella agreed, shaking her head, and exhaled flatly. She was lost inside of her head, inside of her memories, "but Alice saw. . ."

"You know as well as I do that Alice's visions can change. They stand as merely a warning," Edward replied, but his expression turned weary—unsure of the position he kept, finally doubting the abilities of his family.

"How can you be so calm?" Bella inquired incredulously, looking at her husband as though he had three heads. "We could lose Renesmee because of that golden thing! Just the thought-" her fist balled strongly, tearing her hand into the wall next to her, "It makes me want to kill something!"

"Bella," the bronze-haired strigoi started, embracing his wife closely—his arms wrapping around her waist, "we have to stay calm or we'll both lose our minds, and then we'll be worthless to help save our world." Edward stroked his long, nimble fingers through Bella's brunette strands of hair, attempting to lighten the mood, but she wasn't making it easy for him. "You don't think I'm frightened to lose her, too? I am—to death. Trying to even imagine living on forever without Renesmee is impossible for me. I just can't, love. My mind can't even conceive the idea," he explained, huffing out a sigh.

"My mind can," the brunette vampire retorted, a look of longing to disengage from the planet totally plastered all over her expression. "And this is pretty damn scary."

"Love, we have faced many obstacles together—James, Victoria, the Volturi. This challenge will not be any different. We can do this," Edward insisted as Bella studied him carefully.

If she could have been able to cry, she would have.

"But what if we can't. . . Are we really willing to pay that price?" Bella inquired, gripping tightly on the collar of Edward's tee shirt. "Are we prepared to put Renesmee in a casket and bury her? I'm not, Edward. What if you and Jacob were right before?" She didn't know if she believed anymore, that he daughter belonged in this world. Maybe Nessie had always been too perfect—too pure of heart—for it all along, and they were prolonging the inevitable. Maybe she was marked for death, not to cheat it. "What if Renesmee is meant to die?" That's what all the signs seemed to be pointing to.

"No, Bella!" Edward half-exclaimed, cupping her cheeks as his thumbs traced under the black rim of her eyelashes. "Don't say things like that!"

"It's true, Edward," Bella reasoned, mostly to herself. She knew the depths of danger that bounded ahead. Edward didn't. "If Jacob dies, Renesmee's heart will never heal from that. If she dies, we never heal from that."

"Why are you like this?"

_I've lived through it all before, don't you remember?_

"Because if you're the calm one, I have to be the realistic one."

"She will survive."

"She has to."

"And Jacob will see to her safety," Edward added. "I know he will."

Bella buried her face into Edward's chest, her soul filling with blue, bruised, skeptical dread. "I just love her so much, Edward."

"Love, Bella, my love—we both do," the male vampire said, a blatant fact, but Bella already knew for herself. If history inevitably repeated itself, of course Edward would suffer as well, but nobody would break as much as Jacob. He was the one that selfishly dragged everyone into this mess. Wasn't it her obligation now to keep Nessie protected from him? "Renesmee is our daughter. It's the most natural thing in the world for you to be worried, but Jacob's love for her is stronger than either of us could ever really know. I trust him with her, and so do you."

"It's harder than you could possibly know." Because he didn't know. Nobody else did; nobody knew. "You and I have only had eight years with her."

"Yeah," he agreed. "But we will have forever with Renesmee, too. That's why we need to hang on to her."

Bella pulled away. She had to. "I need to go sort out some things."

In a second, Edward was gone; she was gone—away deep into hidden heart of the forest. She no longer felt like her strength was immortal, like she was a force to reckon with, like she was power incarnate. Not at all. She felt like a feeble, imperfect human. There was nothing she could do to save her daughter, not this time either. They were all doomed for failure.

What Bella needed was just a few droplets of hope; and so, she went in search of it. It was concealed; Bella concealed it in the center of the Takoma woodland, by an oak tree. This is where Bella was safe to remember the old world—a trove of forbidden treasures, with pictures, photo albums, and a certain promise. A bracelet.

* * *

><p>"<em>In a casket made of the finest, glimmering glass," Bella began, showering her child a painting of Snow White sleeping, "is where the handsome Prince Charming found the fair, fair Snow White." <em>

_Renesmee pursed her lips together, continuously attempting to wipe off the happy go-lucky smile upon her features, but she couldn't help herself, probably because she already knew the ending. "And then?"_

_Bella read on. "His heart raged in sorrow, seeing what the true power of evil magic could bring. There was no longer anything left for him, but still his lips tinged. All he wanted was a final kiss."_

_The little girl, no more than six (or so it would appear), tilted her head in high anticipation. "Yes?"_

"_But with that kiss, only true love could revive the beautiful princess from her deep slumbering state. Snow White's curse lifted, forgotten instantly when she set eyes upon the gentle face of her Prince Charming. And the two lived and loved Happily. . ."_

"_Ever After!" Nessie beamed giddily, giggling._

"_That's exactly right," Bella said, leaning her forehead against her daughter's and crinkled her nose. "Good girl."_

"_Momma," Nessie whispered in question, and Bella mused to herself how much she increasingly enjoyed hearing that word, "how did the prince know where Snow White was? How did he know to kiss her?"_

"_I don't know," Bella answered affectionately, cupping Nessie's naturally cerise cheeks. "Something inside of the prince's heart must have guided him to her. True love doesn't have to make sense, and it's not the wisest thing to question."_

"_Oh," Nessie blinked, but continued to smile in her childlike fashion, and she was satisfied with that response. "Is Daddy your true love?"_

"_Yes, Renesmee," Bella retorted, hugging her arms around Nessie. It was amazing how much she loved this child, and with every passing moment, Bella loved her even more—how Nessie stood, how she laughed, how she sighed, how she always seemed to be ready for a hug. "Together—only together—have we overcome every obstacle. And you know what else?"_

"_What?" the half-human half-vampire girl inquired._

"_Our love created the most precious, beautiful creature on this planet, the best surprise from life any of us could have ever asked for," Bella elaborated, lacing her fingers through the youngster's copper tendrils. "Can you guess what that is?"_

"_No."_

"_You."_

"_You're so silly, Momma," Nessie laughed. "Do I have a true love?"_

_Bella nodded. "Yes."_

_From outside of the cottage came a small, happy howl, echoing a sound of approval that caused Nessie to giggle. Then, there was a rustle of leaves, as Nessie briefly glanced out at the window, then back at her mother. _

_She was clueless when it came to the imprint, due to Jacob's wishes to keep her in the dark. He had explained to Bella and Edward that all he wanted into the world was the young girl's protection and happiness; but should the day come when feelings are developed, there would be no pressure for her to choose him. Nessie was free to love whomever she deemed worthy of her affection and he wouldn't stand in the way of that. The last thing he wanted to do was hurt her in any way._

_Granted, when this conversation took place, Jacob could barely get through it. His russet complexion had paled; Nessie was a child, for goodness sake, and trying to envision himself ever growing to want her in another way was an idea he wasn't able to stomach yet—much to Edward's amusement. But as platonic as the imprint was at the moment, it was destined to change with time. _

_Still, Nessie was more attuned than anyone gave her credit for. She may not have been as oblivious as Jacob preferred—she felt their bond as much as he did. Something was up. _

"_How do you know?" the hybrid queried. _

"_Because I know that destiny has a grand course figured out for you," Bella retorted._

_Her daughter was growing up so fast, faster than anybody wanted to handle and there was no way to slow her down. In no time at all, Nessie would blossom into the most beautiful woman in the world, taking the world by storm and stealing every boy's heart. Not even eighteen years, not even sixteen years, not even ten years. . ._

"_Then, I don't want to have a happy ending," the young girl announced, her face lighting up like a Fourth of July night. "I want it to last forever."_

"_And it will, baby girl," Bella vowed in one percent certainty, and kissed Nessie on the forehead. "You are the one that gave me forever. I do believe that life will give a forever, too." But at the time this was said, nobody knew about Faethra, or anything at all. "Just remember that true love isn't easy. It's going to take all your might to help it to survive. If your father has taught me anything, it's that falling in love is the simple part. Growing in love is harder. Do you understand, Renesmee?"_

"_Yes, Momma," Nessie nodded._

_Bella didn't know that her next request would ultimately condemn Nessie's fate. "Will you promise me that you will always fight for true love?"_

"_Yes, Momma," Renesmee smiled, giggling. "I will always fight for true love—I pinky swear!"_

"_Good girl," Bella said, secretly mourning another day lost with her only daughter. "Now, close your eyes and get some sleep. It's passed your bedtime, kiddo. I love you."_

"_I love you, too."_

"_Good night, Renesmee."_

"_Good night, Momma."_

_Bella exhaled sharply, examining her daughter once more for the night. Her reddish-brownish curls cascaded over her slender shoulders, wearing a light blue nightgown. She hugged Nessie momentarily, then released her. A finger reached toward the light switch, depressing the lever until the room went absolutely dark, except for the stars shining through Nessie's window._

_She heard Nessie toss and turn beneath her linen sheets, murmuring, "Good night, my Jacob."_

_His reply came two seconds later—a bark, and Bella could practically hear Jacob grinning._

* * *

><p><em>It was almost hilarious how Edward couldn't stop staring off into the distance for Jacob and Renesmee, worrying and griping about when they would be back. The new couple had gone off to La Push the day prior, early, and Edward accidentally caught a dangerous glimpse into Nessie's mind that suggested premarital sex was in her near future. A day later, it was getting rather late, and Bella was all too aware that Edward was silently obsessing over this.<em>

"_What do you think she will look like?"_

_Bella laughed. "I suppose she'll look the same. I don't think one night with Jacob is going to magically transform Renesmee into a different person or alter her appearance," she teased._

_Edward frowned. "You know that's not what I mean."_

"_Yeah, I know," Bella admitted, and began to smile. Unlike her husband, she trusted Jacob with Nessie. "Happy. I think she'll look happy."_

"_I hate that mutt," Edward muttered._

"_No, you don't," Bella countered with a playful smirk. "Come on. You know as well as I do that Jacob wouldn't hurt her. He wants to do right by her. Jacob loves Nessie."_

"_What if he gets her pregnant?" Edward queried solemnly, cringing._

"_I wouldn't worry too much about that if I were you," Bella answered, quirking an eyebrow. "I packed plenty of condoms into Nessie's overnight bag, and she's been on birth control to help with her tri-monthly troubles. Jacob's swimmers would have to be like the Hulk t get through." _

_Not that Bella wanted to think about Jacob's swimmers going anywhere near her baby girl. Yuck. _

"_God forbid," Edward remarked uncomfortably. _

"_Hey, look! They're back!"_

"_Perhaps you should put your shield up, love. I would rather not know the details."_

"_Oh, yeah. No problem."_

_Jacob and Nessie dismounted the Rabbit, the two smiling brightly at each other. Edward glanced away quickly, as the young shape-shifter placed his large hands on her hips and tenderly pulled her in for a kiss. When they came up for air a minute later, the vampire parents heard Nessie giggle._

_Edward sighed. "She does look happy, though."_

"_Glowing," Bella amended._

"_I have to run patrols, but I'll see you tomorrow," Jacob told Renesmee, licking his lips._

"_Mmkay," Nessie sighed, beaming up at him. "I love you, Jacob."_

_He kissed her again. "I love you, too, Ness. See ya later."_

"_See you." Nessie waved at Jacob before he rode off home. A finger threaded through a copper strand of hair, twirling it around, and she all but swooned as she walked up to her parents._

"_Hey there, sweetie," Edward greeted casually. "Did you have a nice time with, Jacob?"_

"_Mhmm, incredible," Renesmee retorted wholeheartedly. _

"_You're arriving pretty late. . ." Bella pointed out._

"_I'm sorry," Nessie apologized; although, Bella had a funny feelings that she didn't really mean it. "I know I should have called, but Jacob and I slept for the better part of the day." She tucked a piece of hair behind the shell of her ear. "Actually, I'm still tired. I'm going to take a shower and maybe catach a nap before dinner."_

"_Okay, Nessie," Bella said._

"_Do you think we should talk to her?" Edward queried, even though it may have been too late for said talk._

"_I'll take care of this," Bella patted Edward's knee, and then followed after her daughter, toward the kitchen. "Nessie?"_

_Nessie turned around. "Hey, Mom. What's up?"_

"_Do you want to tell me what really happened last night?" Bella asked, pursing her lips._

"_What?" Nessie inquired in genuine confusion, and then it clicked. "What? Nothing!"_

"_Ren-"_

"_Mom, nothing happened!" the half-breed exclaimed. "Jacob took me to our cliff, and we just talked all night—about everything." She laughed and bit her bottom lip, blushing. "It was one of the best nights of my life, but we didn't have sex."_

"_But your father heard you considering it," Bella replied, smiling softly._

"_Yeah, only considering it, Momma," Nessie elaborated, rolling her eyes. "My heart wasn't set on it. I wasn't ready for that step yet, and I'm still not."_

_The female vampire took a moment to consider this, tapping her chin in thought. "Would you tell me if you were ready?"_

_Renesmee shook her head, slightly smirking. "Not a chance."_

_Which was fair; Bella wouldn't have told Renee and Charlie if she was in her daughter's shoes, but she nodded. "I guess my baby isn't a baby anymore. I can always trust you to do the right thing." _

_The mother hugged her daughter closely. Day by day, they were running out of time. Soon enough, Jacob would muster up the courage to propose and Nessie would be his forever._

* * *

><p>"<em>Jake! Jacob, wake up!"<em>

_Jacob groaned, at last stirring as his mother in-law roughly shook his shoulders. "Ugh, my head. . ."_

"_What the hell happened?"Bella demanded furiously, glaring down at Jacob._

"_I. . . I don't know," Jacob answered exhaustively, standing up from the kitchen chair. "One minute, I was talking to Nessie, the next thing I know I go Snow White on the table. She. . . she drugged me," he mumbled under his breath, a tone of astonishment and hurt heavy in the Alpha's voice. "Oh, my god! Where is she? What the hell is she doing?"_

_Bella swallowed a lump of dread, feeling loss sinking into her stomach. "I know exactly what she's doing. She's going to fight."_

_I dare you to move_

_I dare you to lift yourself up off the floor_

_I dare you to move_

_I dare you to live like today never happened_

_Today never happened before_


	35. What I Know

**Disclaimer: Nothing belongs to me. Forrealsies. I have taken an oath over this. Song by Parachute!**

_And I'm not certain of the way it was_

_And I'm not sure of what I could've done_

_Oh, but I wonder if it had been enough_

_To stop her from leaving_

_And I realize the only thing I know is_

"Renesmee!" the male half-human half-vampire exclaimed, stepping through the doorway with such a delightfully friendly energy that could almost rival Seth Clearwater's.

It somewhat reminded Jacob of the fifteen year-old version of himself, before he fell moronically in love with Bella Swan. Still, it was clear from this other man's shout that he must have felt something non-platonic for Nessie, and that made Jacob feel awful.

Jacob observed Nahuel and Nessie carefully, though with a painfully tight knot in his stomach, as the two hugged. Nahuel seemed absolutely overjoyed to be in Nessie's presence, his arms embracing around her upper torso, a lovesick expression draped across his narrow features, as Nessie returned his hug—maybe not as enthusiastically.

All the same, she appeared to be content and comfortable to see this man, her ex-boyfriend.

Huh. Her ex-_boyfriend_. Ex-boyfriend. Ex. Boyfriend.

Boyfriend.

The phrase strode up and down the dark roads of Jacob's brain repeatedly, burdening him with images of the two creatures kissing, holding hands, and God knew what else. However, that also meant—since Nahuel was Nessie's ex-boyfriend, she was officially his ex-girlfriend. Former girlfriend, meaning at one point there had some sort of romantic involvement.

Although, Jacob recalled Nessie once assuring him that she had never felt any real affection toward Nahuel, that didn't halt the truth that they had still once were an item. A couple.

Boyfriend and girlfriend.

It was a bigger, much more official title than whatever Jacob and Nessie were supposed to be.

"Nahuel. . ."

After a moment that surely lasted into eternity, Nahuel finally released Nessie, noticing as her hands rested at either side of her hips as she tensed up. Poor thing. Jacob watched her smile and felt a terrifying sensation build in his body and rush through his veins at lightning-quick speed—until she looked back at him, and her smile became even wider. This smile was more genuine, less forced, when those deep and rich pools of milk chocolate light brightened the entire galaxy.

That set him at ease, that she only smiled that way for him.

He loved her even more.

"I have missed you, mi flakita hermosa!" Nahuel grinned, his teak irises lighting up as if Nessie was the most beautiful woman in the world. "It is as almost as if I'm dreaming. You grow more beautiful with each moment—like a fine wine. Better than that, if you ask me. It is truly humbling to see you again."

The would-be Alpha wasn't sure what to make of this half-breed. His skin was the color of mocha—a light tan tint from sunrays—and he had long, raven dreadlocks. There was an athletic physique to him, but something also very skinny, and perhaps somewhat shorter. Nahuel seemed like a decent enough guy, which Jacob thought was somewhat unsettling. Jacob just wanted to much to conjure up a strong hatred for him, but could not somehow.

"Yeah," Nessie replied awkwardly, shifting her weight from one foot to the other. "I've missed you as well, Nahuel."

It was rather nice. Moment by moment, Jacob was more confident that Nahuel hadn't been on Nessie's mind at all lately. Leah, however, looked rather smug, as though she had set some sinister plot in motion and it was working. Now, there was a bubble he was dying to to burst.

"What's wrong, flakita?" Nahuel questioned, jokingly pouting his lips at her, and rested a hand on her right shoulder. "You don't seem terribly pleased to see me."

Nessie grimaced apologetically, tilting her head to one side and started chewing on her nether lip, and then managed to give her friend a gripping smile. "Oh, I am, Nahuel—really pleased to see you. How are you?"

"I have never been better," Nahuel replied softly, and began to give Nessie that look—that same look Leah used to give Sam all those years ago, after he imprinted on Emily, the same look that Jacob knew he used to give Bella. "Naturally, I am always elated to see you. What about you? Leah told me you are in some drastic, dangerous predicament with a type of deer. Tell me—is there a person alive your existence doesn't piss off?"

She shook her head. "Nope, not really."

"I figured as much," Nahuel arched a thick, black eyebrow, smirking slyly. "Tut, tut," he chortled mockingly. "Naughty girl, you should have batted your pretty eyelashes at your new foe. That would have endeared them to you."

In a playful response, the female hybrid fluttered those lush, midnight-black lashes for Nahuel, though, her milk chocolate eyes briefly flitted over to Jacob. He hadn't realized it until just then, but for the last five minutes, he hadn't been smiling. But she was adorable, so he cracked a grin for her—big, bright, beautiful, and sincere. If it weren't for Nahuel and Leah, he probably would have swept her into his arms and kissed her.

"My charm is fading," Renesmee giggled.

Nahuel shook his head. "Never," he muttered affectionately.

A hand rested against the supple apple shape of her cheek as he thumbed across her porcelain skin. She glanced at Nahuel's feet, then back up, and blushed. But this wasn't the same blush that Jacob loved to see. She was uncomfortable.

It was strange how honest he was with her—about the way he felt, dropping obvious hints all over the place—a feature that Jacob had yet to master. Yet. If he ever did. Jacob could merely stand there, and gaze upon their exchange. Nahuel was in love with Nessie, which he could definitely empathize with—she was extraordinary; she was the type of woman that men searched for all their lives, but Jacob was having trouble neglecting the territorial jealousy swelling up in his chest.

But what could he do? Claim her? (Admittedly, he couldn't deny his heart that the idea seemed deviously genius).

She wasn't some trophy and he wouldn't treat her like one.

Maybe if he could be truthful with Nessie, like Nahuel, he wouldn't feel so insecure. Just tell her. Not to mention, they were the same species.

Damn. Just thinking about it made him feel physically sick.

Nessie didn't deserve that from him or anyone else; she deserved to be loved wholeheartedly, somebody that would tell her just how much he loved her—without resolve. Someone like Nahuel, who was transparently out of his mind in love with her. She needed Nahuel.

"Go back home, Nahuel," Nessie implored, sorrowful as the words slowly trickled from her mouth. "I don't need you to risk your life for me. Leah should have never called you and forced you to come here."

"Woah now, little one. No one can force me t go anywhere or help protect anyone I do not want to. I came here willingly, flakita. I would do anything to for you," the man-hybrid declared, looking Nessie dead in the eye.

And that was all about the nearby male shape-shifter could tolerate of being quiet. Jacob began clearly his throat uncomfortably, raising a clenched fist right over his mouth, whilst keeping his forest irises focused on the pair of half-breeds. "Ah-ah-ahem!"

As Nessie stepped back from Nahuel to lean her back against Jacob's toned chest, he finally said something coherent. "Um, hey." Then again, he was never the quick-on-his-feet, articulate sort of guy, at least not when he was trying to be civil.

"Hey," Nahuel replied, nodding toward Jacob.

"Oh. Jacob, this is Nahuel," Nessie started, gesturing back and forth between the two men, "one of my best friends. He helped us out when the Volturi decided to visit, a few years ago. Nahuel, this is my. . . I mean, this is Jacob, my. . ."

"Jacob is Renesmee's worthless excuse for a babysitter. No joke," Leah grumbled beneath an intake of air.

"Put a cork in it, Leah," Nessie said, glowering furiously at her imprinter.

"No," Leah huffed in reply.

Nessie rolled her eyes. "Just ignore her, Jacob."

"I'm trying."

Jacob gently grasped his massive, warm hands on to Renesmee's shoulders to keep himself from knocking Leah's block off. Nevertheless, this simple contact intrigued his senses and began to massage her shoulders tenderly, kneading her skin between his thumbs like dough. He had swallow of lump of sugary lust back down his throat, as Nessie reached backward to tap the side of his hipbone. It was all he could do to not jump her right then and there, but he had to remain in control.

"Nessie and I are good friends," he retorted as Nessie emitted an involuntary, but pleased groan.

Clearly, there were coming across as more than good friends. Much more. Even though Jacob had yet to call Nessie his own (or state himself as Nessie's) out loud, he wanted to get that point across to Nahuel.

"Nessie?" Nahuel inquired, blinking in confusion.

Oh, right. Not everyone was aware of her nickname yet. "Renesmee. . ."

A look of comprehension washed over Nahuel's expression, his features contorting into a jovial relaxation. "Ah, so that must make you _the_ Jacob Black." His hand extended forward for Jacob's, and the two men shook hands.

"I guess I must be," Jacob retorted.

Okay, okay. There was no good reason to hate this guy.

"It's a pleasure to finally meet you, even if you are causing quite the stir," Nahuel joked. "Personally, I respect for that. Living forever can get quite boring without some action to spice up the life. And, well, I can tell you that Renesmee is the right woman to get yourself into trouble with." He glanced at Nessie, who simpered casually in response. "Sure as the sky is blue, this one is a heartbreaker. Good luck. You're going to need it."

Jacob smiled warmly, and decided Nahuel was safe to trust. "Thanks, man."

Nahuel gestured to the balcony. "May I speak with you in private for a moment?"

"Sure, sure," the Native American nodded.

"Ladies, if you'll excuse us." Of course, his light brown eyes were on Nessie, bit it might have disgruntled him when she didn't exactly appear too distraught over him and Jacob wandering five feet away.

The wolf-human and human-vampire disappeared outside, while Nessie and Leah began to bicker inside.

For many lingering moments, there was an awkward silence between the two men. Jacob leaned over the railing casually, gazing out over the fence—watching the forest from afar. It was quiet, just like that night after his and Nessie's first date, not even the birds were chirping their high-pitched tunes. He was slowly learning not to trust the silences; the golden hind could be spying on them at this particular moment for all anyone knew. There was almost no way to strategize for Faethra.

What was worse that Leah could have easily presumed correctly about their whole ordeal, about Faethra. Nessie's life was in danger.

He wanted to protect her—of course he did, more than anything—but what if he couldn't? What if he was inadequate?

And then Jacob remembered that Nahuel wanted to discuss something.

"What's up?" Jacob asked.

Nahuel chuckled nervously, and stood next to Jacob. "When Leah called me the other day," he began, exhale sharply as though he wanted to deliberate the remainder of his sentence, "I didn't know what to anticipate, but I began to imagine what you be like." Jacob smiled, predicting what else Nahuel was going to say. "I pictured some slobbering drunk, smelling of booze and smoke, lusting like a dog—um, no offense—over Renesmee. I envisioned a spiteful, hairy man with a vendetta to hurt her to get back at her mother for scorning you. You were quite the evil man in my head," the half-human half-vampire male confessed.

"I guess I can't blame you." Jacob sighed, furrowing his eyebrows.

"Tell her," he told Jacob.

Jacob glanced over his shoulder. "What?"

"Tell her."

"I'm not sure what you're getting at."

"Tell her."

"Tell who what?"

"You know what I'm talking about," Nahuel snapped maliciously, though it was nothing more than a fleeting instance of annoyance, with a bitter chuckle. "Tell Renesmee how you honestly feel—that you're in love with her," he clarified, rolling his eyes as if Jacob was daft.

"I don't know what you're talking about," Jacob continued to state, playing the role of the oblivious fool.

"Yes, I strongly believe that you do, Jacob Black," Nahuel said, huffing only a little bit. "You are in love with her, and I do not fault you for that. I love her as well, with every fiber of my being. I want her to be happy. I love Renesmee," he assured the shape-shifter, "more than you know."

But Jacob wanted to tell Nahuel that there was no possible way that Nahuel loved Nessie more than he did.

"You would just let her go?" Jacob queried, feeling his lips strain upside down in a grimace—in puzzlement. "Just like that? You want her to be with me?"

"No, of course not," Nahuel retorted, raising a dark eyebrow and frowned.

"I don't get it. . ." Jacob trailed off, and was suddenly wishing that he hadn't said that.

"Renesmee is not mine to let go of. If she was, I would not behave so recklessly with her. I would fight until the death," he elucidated, clicking his tongue impatiently. "As it is, her affections will never be held in my favor. It is not an easy thing to accept, but I can see what you two have. Do not her, or yourself, a chance at true love, because you will regret it."

The Quileute man rolled his eyes, snorting at that comment. Did Nahuel actually find him to be that much of a idiot? How would he not be able to exist in pure agony if he didn't have Nessie in his life? "She can do better than me."

There was the statement of the century.

Nessie could do better than anyone, but she could choose from any man on this wide Earth—with an actual lot in life, with someone to shower her with pounds of endless adoration, with a man that could get down on one knee. All the while, Jacob felt bile bubbling in the pit of his stomach, but perhaps not in a mortifying manner—the contrary, honestly.

And maybe it wasn't bile either. Maybe it was butterflies, because he couldn't help but fantasizing about sharing a real relationship with his Nessie—taking her on long walks down the shoreline of First Beach, waking up on divinely drowsy Sunday afternoons after a full night of love-making, simple candlelit dinners to celebrate their marriage anniversaries, and then getting to memorize how her face contorted in expression of wondrous bliss when their bodies were joined.

Nahuel glanced down at the ground briefly and then back to Jacob. "I would love to agree, but alas, nothing is better than true love. If you walk away from her, everyone will hate you for hurting her, but somehow not as much as you'll surely hate yourself."

Jacob shook his head, tracing his tongue along his bottom teeth. "I don't love Nessie."

"Then why haven't you left yet?" Nahuel questioned, the corners of his mouth lifting into a thin smirk. "Hmmm?"

"Running away is what cowards do best," Jacob retorted, shrugging nonchalantly. "I should know. I've been doing that for a very long time, and I'm done with it."

And he didn't want to leave Nessie, anyway. Being with her was simple, uncomplicated, and fun. Did he really want to give her up now? No, no way. He refused to allow Leah to be right. That's wasn't happening.

The halfling vampire guffawed a thick, resounding chuckle. "You may be able to deceive yourself, Jacob Black, but I am not as easily tricked. Neither is Renesmee."

A long, drawn out sigh emanated from Jacob's chest, and he knew that he was about to crack under pressure. "I'm crazy about her," he finally admitted. When he closed his eyes, all he could see was Nessie. All he could think about was Nessie. "I don't know what's even holding me back from telling her."

"Fear," he said, slanting his lips into a vague grimace, and gently patted Jacob on the back as if they were best buddies that got together on Superbowl Sundays. "But hey, if you can suffer through Leah's wrath, you must be pretty courageous."

"Maybe," Jacob said with a slight jeer.

A little later on, Jacob and Nahuel returned inside to wait for Sam and the rest of the La Push wolf pack. Leah went to her room to change into clothes that she wouldn't mind ripping to shreds during the inevitable phase, but Nessie had grown a smidgen claustrophobic.

With a glass of water in hand, the half-breed made her way to Leah's balcony in a zombie-like state. Jacob was absolutely fixated on her—the way she slouched in a green lawn chair as her shirt was beginning to ride up her smooth, slim stomach, the way she constantly fiddled with the latch on her gold locket, and the way she was trying to exit her mind from all this drama. He slid open the glass door, deciding to check on her at last.

"Hey, the guys will be here soon."

"Okay."

"Nessie, are you all right?"

"Yeah, I'm fine."

"C'mon. You don't have to lie to me. Spit it out."

"You really don't want to hear it," Nessie responded, dangling her locket on its chain.

"Let me be the judge of that," Jacob replied, and ruffled her reddish-brownish hair.

"It's this whole stupid Nahuel thing," Nessie started to complain, shaking her head repeatedly. "I am so frustrated that Leah brought him here! As backup! She had no right!" She gulped down that water in a nanosecond; Jacob almost worried that she was going to choke. "Are you and I really that horrible together?"

"Who knows?" Jacob asked, albeit rhetorically, and shrugged.

"I do," she murmured, rolling her eyes.

"I do, too."

Nessie crinkled her nose, standing up impatiently, and deliberately dropped the cup over the black metal railing, until it smashed in dozens of sharp shards against the concrete sidewalk before. "I love Nahuel." Jacob's heartbeat faltered. "I really do, but I could never be in love with him," Nessie explained, pouting slightly, "and that's what I have told everyone, including Leah, time and time again. I wish she wouldn't try to control my life." She licked her perfect, adorable, pink tongue along her nether lip. "Jacob, I want to be with _you_." His heart rebooted instantly.

"You are with me, Nessie," he reassured her, tenderly weaving his russet digits through Renesmee's creamy ones. He wanted to kneel down in front of her and swear forever to her. That would have truly convinced her.

"What about Leah's temper?" Nessie queried, slightly frowning.

"Bring it on. She doesn't scare me, and you're worth it," he told her matter-of-factually, as Nessie nodded in feigned suspicion.

"Oh, really? Am I? Do you really mean that?"

"Just don't let it go to your head," Jacob replied, grinning widely for his Nessie.

"You have the best smile," the half-human half-vampire girl giggled, placing her delicate hands on both of his cheeks to caress her ring fingers over the deeply set dimples.

A mahogany flame burned deliciously in her rich eyes, while Jacob's mouth, in turn, began to water in thirst for her shell-pink lips, craving for the softness and the flawlessness. He was caught under her enchantment, lost in the heat of the moment as he leaned in for a kiss. Closer and closer, their lips inched, two sets of warm breaths mingling, and-

"_Jacob! Nessie!" Kim Connweller-Cameron exclaimed excitedly, her black hair tied in a messy ponytail, smelling scrumptiously of honey-roasted pink ham, seasoned red-skinned mashed potatoes, hot pork gravy, and sweet, yellow corn. "Merry Christmas!" _

_Poor Kim. She seemed way in over her head, having volunteered her and Jared to host this year's Christmas festivities for the wolf pack family. Kim wanted to prove to everyone that Emily wasn't the only wholesome entertainer amongst the imprints, not that Emily minded sharing the spotlight and getting a short vacation from the kitchen. And so far, so good was the Alpha's conclusion due to the yummy scents wavering through the air._

"_Hey, Kim," Jacob smiled back, his stomach growling._

"_Merry Christmas, Kimberly. Thank you for inviting me," Renesmee replied cheerfully, her cheeks flushed from the winter chill._

_Kim rolled her eyes jokingly. "Whatever, Nessie. You're part of the family, too. Just come on in and make yourselves comfortable. Everyone is in the living room." She gestured for them to follow her inside of the Cameron house while she flitted to the kitchen. The shape-shifter and half-breed laughed at their friend's nervous disposition._

"_Hey, look!" Paul guffawed obnoxiously with a mouthful of corn chips. "It's the Alpha and his faithful sidekick!"_

"_And look where they're standing!" Brady pointed upward. _

_Nessie and Jacob simultaneously cast their gaze north, where Kim and Jared had apparently decorated the hallway threshold with green tinsel and a certain holiday cliché. "Oh, no," they muttered in unison._

"_Mistletoe!" Embry exclaimed in a sing-song voice._

"_Claire, cover your eyes," Quil commanded, though he was already doing so for his seven year-old imprint._

_She tried slapping away his hands from her eyes, insisting, "I know what a kiss is, Quil!"_

"_Jacob and I are not going to kiss," Nessie stated firmly, shaking her head, and gulped down a lump of apprehension._

"_Ah, what? That's breaking tradition!" Jared shouted, followed by a choir of 'do it already!'_

"_Yeah, it's mistletoe!" Collin chuckled loudly, making Nessie flinch. "You have to!"_

"_Kiss, kiss!" Sam hollered, pumping his fist in the air, encouraging for the rest of the guys to join in, while Rachel, Leah, Emily, and Claire rolled their eyes. "Kiss, kiss, kiss, kiss! Come on! Kiss!"_

"_We don't have to do anything." Honestly, Jacob wanted to—kiss Nessie; he had been dying to for awhile now._

_Over the past few months, he had imagined it a million times, just giving her one of those sweet, chaste first kisses, perhaps on their cliff in the spring. Not once had he pictured all of his best friends screaming at them to get it over with. That wasn't how Nessie's first kiss should have been; that's not what she deserved—an audience of neanderthals, and especially if she didn't want to kiss him. If need be, Jacob would use his trusty Alpha tone to get them to settle down, which he didn't exactly feel comfortable doing for simple things. Damn all of this yahoos for pressuring his girl. He would kill them all later._

"_Okay, maybe we should just give them what they want, Jake," she said, turning to face him, sighing wearily. She was blushing bright cherry pink, and shrugged. "It might get them to shut up."_

"_Are you sure?" Jacob asked incredulously, both eyebrows quirking in astonished exhilaration._

"_No," she answered, smirking coyly, "but why not?"_

"_I'm really sorry they're suck jerks," he apologized, frowning._

"_Stop chatting and smooch already!" Jared yelled._

_With at least a millisecond of further deliberation on Jacob's part, he just smiled. A hand wandered to her face. He would try to make this as romantic for her as possible, as he choose to drown at the voices and hoped she would do the same. It was just them together, nobody else was around. Finally, Jacob's eyes closed, connecting their lips. Softly, Jacob moved his mouth against hers, or maybe it was the other way around. Heat racked throughout his body; electricity shout out from his fingertips when Nessie pressed her round chest into his; his mind was no longer attached to his body, experiencing this divine ambrosial rush passing betwixt Nessie's lips, straight into his soul. Her fingers became lost in Jacob's raven hair, pulling him in closer and deeper. Was she actually kissing him back? It was freaking amazing, right up until she pulled away._

_She smiled at him, but then escaped to the back porch where the rest of the imprintees joined her. At dinner, Nessie and Jacob rarely spoke to one another and could barely manage to make any eye contact. Because Kim sat the two best friends next to each other, occasionally their elbows would bump or their hands would mistakenly collide when they reached for the salt or pepper. Jacob would catch glimpses into Nessie's thoughts, knowing now that their kiss was replaying over and over in her mind. He was thinking about it, too, but definitely not with as much regret._

_Afterward, Nessie offered to wash the dishes when everyone returned to the living room too watch a movie. She was trying to avoid him, but Jacob wouldn't tolerate that. If things were weird now, things could be weird tomorrow. If things were weird tomorrow, things could be weird the day after that. If things were weird the day after that, things could be weird forever. And he wouldn't jeopardize his bond with Nessie over a moment that could be easily forgotten—not that he wanted to forget it._

"_What's up, homie?"_

"_Hi."_

"_You know, only you would volunteer yourself to do the dishes at another person's house," Jacob said as Nessie finished up drying off the last dish. "As helpful as you are, you hate other peoples filth, and you only put up with it as a distraction. So, why don't you tell me what's going?"_

_A bubbly eruption of giggles burst from Renesmee the moment she finally looked at him. Her arms crossed over her stomach, holding on as her face went red from laughing so hard._

"_What?" Jacob inquired in amusement, grinning ear-to-ear. "What's so funny?"_

_Taking another seconds to catch her breath, Nessie answered, "I kissed you—Jacob Black! You were my first kiss!"_

"_Not really what you were dreaming about, huh?"_

"_No," Nessie shook her head, and brushed back a strand of bronze hair behind her ear, regarding Jacob nonchalantly. "I can't say I ever envisioned a bunch of guys shouting at me to make out wit my best friend," she elaborated, pursuing her lips._

"_I'm really sorry, Nessie," Jacob uttered sympathetically. What if he was destined to never experience a successful first kiss? And Nessie was the only one Jacob even wanted to be kissing, but no. His so-called friends had to go and ruin that. "It should have been special."_

_Nessie patted Jacob's arm, her hand lingering over his muscular forearm. "At least I wasn't punched in the face."_

"_You have a point there," he nodded, chortling and stepped closer to her, "but your second kiss could be better."_

"_Oh, yeah?"_

"_Yeah."_

"_In a kitchen?" Nessie murmured, but Jacob was elated that she wasn't rejecting his proposal just yet. In fact, she looked intrigued—at ease._

"_Sure, sure," Jacob replied. He gently grasped his imprint's soft hands and rested them flat over his chest. "Just follow my lead."_

_The half-breed's heartbeat quickened, thundering in a way that almost caused Jacob to reconsider, but he didn't while her cheeks grew hot in a painfully adorable cerise blush. Jacob attached his mouth upon Nessie's once again, cupping the back of her head. Fervently, they kissed in a tender fever. A thousand bright colors exploded behind his eyelids, as his heart ran a marathon, and he had to tell himself to breathe. When the gentlest of groans escaped from Nessie, he was taken aback, and it was all he could do not to allow his hands to roam around her body. He mentally disciplined himself to remain patient, massaging their lips together harder. Heat, electricity. Jacob recalled these sensations from their first kiss. _

_This time, it was slightly better because they were alone, and yet this time, the kiss was somehow still the same._

"_How was that?" Jacob asked in a whisper._

"_I don't know," Nessie smiled. "Kind of like the first time."_

_After that day, Jacob and Nessie mutually agreed they would never kiss again. Naturally, they didn't—until New Years' rolled around, and their lips entwined, again on Jacob's birthday, then once more on Valentine's Day, and then every Thursday. At last, Jacob confessed his feelings for Nessie, and from then on, they kissed without reservation everyday. _

* * *

><p>"Jeez, get a room you two," Nahuel chuckled, wrinkling his nose as he, Seth, and Leah came to interrupt them in the middle of their moment.<p>

"Yeah, can we keep my porch G-rated?" Leah grumbled in disgust.

"The rest of the pack is here and we want to move the meeting elsewhere so it's safe to phase," Seth stated, gesturing inside where Sam, Paul, Jared, Brady, Collin, Quil, and Embry were all gawking at Nessie and Jacob in confusion. Uh-oh. Their secret was out to the pack now.

"Sure, sure." Jacob turned his attention back to Nessie. "I'll see you at Charlie's later, okay?"

"Yes, of course," she answered, kissing his cheek; he fought to keep his emotions in check when he almost said that he loved in repercussions to her sweetness. "Be safe."

_She said_

_I'm in love with someone else _

_She said_

_I feel in love with someone else and I_

_I'm in love with someone_

_And that's all that I know for sure_


	36. The Longer I Run

**Disclaimer: Nothing belongs to me. This song is by Peter Bradley Adams!**

**Author's Note: I'm so sorry I've been away for so long, dear readers. I went to Disney World with some family and a few close friends. I had a spectacular time and hope to do it again next summer, but I really missed writing this story with a passion. R&R!**

_When my blood runs warm with the warm red wine_

_I miss the life that I left behind_

_But when I hear the sound of the blackbird's cry_

_I know I left in the nick of time_

_Well, this road I'm on is gonna turn to sand_

_And leave me lost in a far off land_

_So let me ride the wind until I don't look back_

_Forget the life that I almost had_

Being in a wolf pack was like riding a bicycle, but maybe in a really bizarre way—once Jacob finally got back on, it was surprisingly more simple than he remembered. Jacob's mind was no longer surrounded by other minds that thrived on the savagery behind a merciless kill, bitter about the existence of bloodsuckers in general, or hated being wolves. All of them had matured, or maybe they hadn't.

Maybe they were merely content with their lives. Happy.

Sam was a doting husband to Emily, a father of two (soon to be three) children, and had a life every simple man could only dream about. Jared and Kim had been happily married for a couple of years now and expecting their first child to pop out in a few months while Paul and Rachel were still enjoying a humble marriage, but they were discussing the right time to start a family. Claire, Quil's imprint, had recently turned ten and no longer found pouring rocks on his head to be the funniest thing in the world. Seth was engaged to Marguerite, and would be bride and groom in a total of seven days; it was all Seth could think about—elated and excited.

Happy, happy, happy.

Meanwhile, Embry, Brady, and Collin were expectedly sickened all the lovey dovey romance constantly spreading around, but they were nonetheless pleased by their with their own single lives for the time being; although, each of them looked forward to the possibility of finding an imprint someday.

_If _they ever found their imprint one day.

And then there was the luckiest of all the wolves, Leah, who shared in Renesmee Cullen's life, her secret hopes and her dreams, all the good times and bad times. Never in a million years would Jacob ever have considered himself jealous of Leah, but alas, that's the way it turned out.

"_Hey there, Black_," Paul barked, as the whole pack was already phased and wandered around the La Push area. His thoughts were meant to tease Jacob, replaying that kiss over and over again, exagerrating minor details such as where his hands were during the moment. "_What was with the heavy lip action on Baby Cullen?_"

Jared grinned, planting his butt on the ground. "_I hope we weren't interupting anything hot and heavy_."

What a liar. In fact, Jacob got the distinct impression Jared was quite satisfied that he and the others had ruined a moment between him and Nessie, or perhaps he was giddy that there was simply a moment to ruin.

"_By the looks of it, we kind of were_," Embry chortled lightly, casting a knowing wink toward Jacob.

"_What happened, Jacob?_" Seth questioned, genuinely concerned, confused, and curious. "_The other day you couldn't wait to be away from Ren. You were all but jumping down her throat._"

Paul somehow felt the need to how at that and couldn't resist the unintentional innuendo, causing Leah to cringe. "_I bet you wish you were all the way down her throat, huh, Jacob?_"

Both Leah and Jacob growled at this immature joke, glaring at Paul in a heated fury. Neither one of them appreciate the way that sounded. Paul made it sound like Nessie was nothing more than a sexual conquest.

"_Buzz off, Paul_," the would-be Alpha snarled darkly at the gray wolf, baring his fangs. Whatever was happening between him and Nessie wasn't anyone elses business.

"_Ah, you're just being a prude because you know it's true_," Embry laughed suggestively. That damn traitor.

Subsequently, Jacob attempted, with much difficulty, to not allow the memory of his manhood engulfed in the half-human half-vampires woman's mouth,coaxing him to climax over her dancing tongue, to flash through his mind. His mouth, however, watered and he swallowed back a lusty lump of desire. The imagery alone set his pores on fire, but shook it out of his head before anyone could see.

"_So, do you want to tell us about it, man?_" Quil inquired, a slight taunting seasoned in his tone. "Y_ou might as well. We caught plenty of the show._"

What show? All they did was kiss!

"_Ugh_," Leah scoffed, rolling her eyes, "_can we not?_"

"_No, even I'm curious about it_," Sam answered, smiling at Jacob, who was increasingly weary of all of his friends suddenly so damn inquisitive of what was a matter that was soley between him and Nessie. "_How did you two go from being arch enemies to becoming roomies?_" Near lovers. . .

"_He loves her_," Quil retorted, matter-of-factually, shrugging as though that fact was blatant and written down in a history book somewhere.

"_I really wish everyone would stop assuming how I feel about Nessie_," Jacob huffed, though his heart instantly betrayed him. It began to race a mile a second, roaring with a needy ferocity that left his brain in a dizzy stupor; he was sure that only Nessie was able to soothe his aching heart.

Was this what a heart attack felt like?

He inwardly cursed himself for not exercising control in front of his nosy pack brothers.

Bitches.

"_Oh, puh-leeze, Black_," Jared jeered sardoincally, waving his paw back and forth. "_Love isn't rocket science_."

"_Ew_," Leah commented, scrunching up her nose in disgust; Jacob wanted to get the hell over and move on already, or maybe he could simply knock some sense into her. "_Don't even think about it. I'll make you wish that your father had worn a better condom_," the she-wolf cautioned, crouching low to the ground.

"_Oh, I'm so scared._"

"_Shut up!_"

"_Yeah. . . I'm with Leah on this one,_" Brady agreed with a small shrug. "_Sorry, buddy. Nessie is way too good for you._"

"_What, like she'd really fall for you?_" Collin asked, shaking his head to and fro.

"_It could happen._"

"_Only in your dreams, bro._"

"_Yeah, mostly. . ._"

Oh, god.

And then everyone caught a shameful glimpse into Brady's late night dreams, the wet ones—Nessie's body pressed right up against his, Nessie with her auburn tendrils splayed all over his pillow, the sweet taste of Nessie's naked porcelain flesh lingering on his tongue, and Nessie moaning Brady's name as her face contorted into a dazed, blissful expression.

Without realizing it, a low rumble eminated from the russet wolf's chest, dangerous and possessive and instinctive. Nessie was Jacob's, only his. Nobody else would ever be allowed to touch her like that.

"_Double ew,_" Leah remarked.

"_Ahem_." Sam patted the dirt softly, scraping the ground against his sharp claws as he gained back Jacob's attention. "_The point I was trying to make is that. . . Well, you know, why else would you be doing all this crap for Ren if you're not in love with her? Out of the goodness of your heart? C'mon. We all saw the way you looked at her._"

"_True that,_" Jared nodded. If he wasn't phased into a giant wolf, he would have been smirking like a smug son of a bitch right about now. It was amazing he and Paul weren't biological brothers. "_Like a blind man seeing the sun for the first time._"

Yet still, Jacob was determined to deny it the public, even though they all knew he was lying. "_It's not like that._"

"_There's no shame in loving Ren, Jacob_," Sam stated, sharing a quick memory of Renesmee with Jacob—of her as a small child skipping around his house and passing around heart-shaped lollipops for Valentine's Day. "_She is always a little ray of sunshine. You obviously don't care anymore if she's part-vampire and that she's a Cullen, so what's your real problem?_"

"_Maybe it's the age difference. I mean, he's definitely robbing the cradle._" Paul suggested. "_Jake is twenty-four and Ren is eight._"

"_Nah, it's can't be that,_" Embry replied, shaking his head, when actually that detail rarely crossed Jacob's mind. There was no trace of a mere young girl in Nessie. "_Let's face it—Nessie's not exactly your typical eight year-old brat. She's probably smarter than most people in their wise age, more mature than any of us-_"

"_Speak for yourself,_" Leah muttered with a playful sneer, but nodded along. She was proud of her imprint.

"_And Ren is hot,_" Collin added on Embry's deliberation.

"_Really hot,_" Brady grinned with a wolfish, wide grin. Again, he started fantasizing about a very exposed Nessie, and it was all Jacob could do not to clobber the little git. "_Man, what I would do for her to wake up in my bed all happy and exhausted from a great night of long, raunch fu_-"

"_Hey, cool it, dude_," Jacob warned, precariously growling at the younger shape-shifter.

"_My bad._"

Nobody would ever touch his Nessie in the same manner he would, or he hoped so at least. Nobody would ever bring her to the precipace of Cloud Nine and back that way he could. Nobody would ever love her the way he did. Not ever.

Nessie was Jacob's one to cherish, with every simple kiss and with every burning touch, he would prove himself to her, though she would always deserve far better than anything he could give her; Nessie was Jacob's one to protect and love for the rest of his life, whether it lasted forever or ended tomorrow; Nessie was Jacob's one.

His, his his.

With a sharp sigh, Jacob reigned in the chaos of his thunderous inner words. Or tried to anyway. He already knew that Renesmee would never go for Brady, he was absolutely certain that she must have felt somewhat of the same way for him—not for Brady, not for Nahuel, not for anybody else, but for _him_. Although, there was still a chance, a monumental one, that she wasn't in love with him, like he was with her.

No. Wait a minute. Wait, wait! He mentally rewound his contempation, but it was too late. The damage was done. No. It was a mistake.

Jacob did not love Nessie. He did not love her. He did not love her.

"_Say that as many times as you want, bro. That won't make the feelings go away_," Paul chortled lightheartedly.

"_I don't love her,_" Jacob insisited futilely. "_Just because she's beautiful, smart, and funny doesn't mean that she has reeled my heart in on her hook._"

"_But you can't stop thinking about her_," Jacob countered.

"_Well, maybe that's because you morons can't stop thinking about her, and you're trying to manipulate __me into admitting something that I could never actually mean._" Was that a lie? Oh, hell yes. "_I'm beginning to think you meatheads are in love with Nessie._" They better not be.

"_Nah_," Jared replied.

There was a resounding of agreement amongst the majority of the Quileute wolf pack.

Suddenly, the world was spinning and all Jacob could see was Kim's delicate, copper hands stroking affectionately over her bare, potruding stomach, Rachel smiling almost blindingly at Paul whenever he returned home, Emily indulging her and Sam's mischievous children in a game that involved a lot of chasing on her part, Marguerite mock dancing to a hip-hop song on the passenger's side of Seth's car, and Claire making sandcastles on First Beach.

Jacob could only remember a time when he envied the power of the imprint—the irrevocable, undeniable fire to having a real soul mate—how the universe made sense because of just one person's existence, how each mistake and each accomplishment meant something, how nobody could really predict when they were going to fall in love with their one and only, and all that junk. At one point, it was all he ever wanted, except for wanting to end up with Bella. Long ago, imprinting was all his heart could think to want, to be sickeningly sweet in love with some random girl and settle down, start a family and whatever.

But then, a half-human half-vampire girl happened to his life. He didn't care about imprinting anymore, going as far to dread it. He wanted Nessie. His love must have been the equivalent to the phenomenon—possibly stronger. If he ever did imprint, Jacob was secretly sure that she had no chance in hell of comparing to Nessie, though, the notion frightened him.

Could there be another, hidden reason to why Jacob denied Renesmee his heart without relent? Could he have actually been waiting for someone else—someone better? Was there a better, greater, truer, deeper love destined to find him one day out of the blue? His imprint? His soul mate? The right girl? Would his love for Renesmee eventually become miniscule like Sam's love for Leah?

None of that seemed likely, actionable however. Meeting and knowing Nessie couldn't have just been a fortunate coincidence, right? Right.

Still, there was Leah, on the other hand, who continuosly forced the thought on Jacob; he would inevitably hurt her.

"_What if he imprints? That girl would be his whole world_," Leah elucidated, recalling herself watching Sam becoming so enraptured with Emily that he seemingly erased all the things they shared as a man and woman who once couldn't get enough of each other. She pictured Jacob harming her imprint in the same way; in turn, and thanks to the pack mind, so did Jacob. "_I know from experience that surviving a heartbreak isn't exactly a piece of cake. It sucks. I don't know want that to happen to her, too. Ren hasn't done anything wrong to anyone, and all of you care about her almost as much as I do. Do we really want to see her suffer over a quick fling?_"

Crap. There was that word again.

Hesitantly, Jacob confessed that he understood Leah's perspective. He didn't yearn to hurt Nessie; he didn't want to make her bitter; and he definitely didn't want to replace her either.

"_Jacob won't imprint on anybody_," Sam said reassuringly.

"_You can't possibly know that,_" Leah growled tempermentally, looking at her ex-boyfriend as if he was a cartoon character.

"_I do. It's like Jared said. Jacob is the blind man and Nessie is the sun, he gave her that same look that first day, too_," Sam explained, laughing at the image of Jacob and Nessie glaring at each other, despite that there was a lazily concealed love scratching at the surface. "_We all saw that look then, as well._" That look, the one in which a man blatantly reveals that he was abruptly unable to live the rest of his life without a certain woman. "Y_ou can fall in love as many times as your heart will let you, but you'll only ever give and get that look once in a lifetime._" Sam loved Leah. Everyone had known that, but he never gave her that special goo-goo eyed look that reserved for Emily, and Emily alone.

"_There is a once in a lifetime opportunity, a one and only if you will for everybody. Nessie is Jacob's,_" Quil added, certain of what Sam's meaning.

"_Nessie isn't my one,_" Jacob retorted, positive on that. If she was, he would have imprinted on her.

"_Hey, Jake, if you want to be miserable and lonely for the rest of your life, you just keep telling yourself that,_" Paul joked slightly, but was mostly serious. "_I still think you should be honest with her, even if you can't be honest with yourself. She's the one. . . that has to put up with you. Doesn't she deserve that from you at least?_"

"_I don't love her_," which was a damn, flipping lie, "_but that doesn't mean I don't care about her._"

"_Okay, so can someone please explain to me what any of this has to do with defeating that evil Bambi thing?_" Leah complained.

"_Leah's right,_" Sam admitted reluctantly, rolling his eyes. "_It's time to get down to business. What we know about this golden hind is that she wants revenge and she's fast—faster that we are. I honestly don't know what we're going to do._"

"_We already patrol for vampires and this stupid thing,_" Embry mentioned in a mild complaint. "_Why change the routine?_"

"_Because Nessie was almost killed by that yellow butt,_" Jacob retorted, and they all flinced when he recalled the shrill shriek of Renesmee's frightened voice reviberating throughout the forest. "_None of what we're doing is enough. None of this can take this lightly. Faethra is a real threat, and I don't know. . . We can't be careless. What we probably need to do is double the search parties, take longer __hours, and always have a Cullen nearby._"

Hmm, that seemed like a smart course of action, without being too bossy.

"_You mean, let them on our lands permanently?_" Sam queried.

"_Yeah,_" Jacob answered. "_Maybe Edward or Emmett._"

"_Isn't having Nahuel around enough?_" Brady grumbled in a tone of annoyance, probably out of jealousy.

"_No. There's strength in numbers._"

"_But, Jacob,_" Jared began in desperation, and Jacob felt the poor guy's heart drop to his stomach like a stone. "_We all have jobs and-_"

"_I know, Jared,_" Jacob interupted in full understanding. He couldn't relate to them directly, but a sharp pang stung his own heart when he thought of being away from his not-girlfriend for too long. How could he manage the heartache of separation if he went back to Seattle? "_You have imprints._"

"_The Alpha has spoken, Jared,_" Sam said, exhaling through his wet nostrils. "_The sooner we catch this golden hind, the sooner we can get back to our real lives._"

Incentinve. Imprinting.

"_Alpha?_" Jacob repeated increduously, astounded by his old friend's relent on power. He wasn't ready for that position, because. . . Well, for a number of reasons; mainly, he just didn't want it. "_But I don't wanna be the Alpha!_"

"_Calm down,_" Sam muttered, mentally rolling his eyes. "_It's only temporary until you leave again._"

Ouch. Even he belived Jacob would walk out on Nessie.

"_Fine,_" Jacob shrugged, feining nonchalance. "_Seth, are you still planning on getting married this week?_"

"_Yeah, why?_"

"_Okay. Well, you might have a lot of last-minute planning todo in such a short time,_" Jacob presumed rightly. He was willing to allow Seth that time to prepare everything with Madge in that week.

"_No way,_" Seth replied immediately. "_I'm a guy, remember? I don't know anythng about weddings._"

"_True._"

"_Marguerite and Nessie have that all under control. Nobody is doing my share of the work._"

"_Are you sure?_" Jacob asked, but he already knew the answer. He could always count on Seth for support, understanding, and loyalty.

"_Yes, Jacob,_" Seth responded, giving the rightful Alpha a reassuring nod. "_Madge and I consider Nessie to be a part of our family. We would have be devastated if the hind took her away. Losing her is out of the question._"

Jacob smiled. "_Thanks, man_."

"_Anytime._"

"_Now what?_" Paul inquired, unhappy of this new arrangement, but committed himself to dealing with it.

"_Sam, Jared, Paul, and Collin will stay on La Push for now while Seth, Embry, and I scout in Forks for Faethra,_" Jacob elucidated, glancing between them, and tried his best to behave like an Alpha would.

"_Wait a minute, Boss Man,_" Brady started, slightly irritated that his new Alpha didn't even think to give him a task. "_I'll take your place. Leah and I can alternate. Don't forget that you're still Nessie's main protector, at the moment. Go hang out with her._"

"_Her name isn't Nessie,_" Leah stated dryly.

"_Yeah. We'll call you when we need you_," Sam agreed, ignoring Leah's previous remark.

Who was Jacob to argue with that logic? "_Sure, sure. Thanks. See you later._"

As finally ran away from his pack and home to Nessie, the wind picked up to a cool, fast, wavy, ever-flowing breeze, blowing his russet fur along. It felt different somehow, like a last breath mingling with the dark pigments of his skin, entering through his thawing heart, and encountering his damned soul—damned, if only for falling in love with a girl that happened to be a Cullen descendant. There was a new pain, almost a bleeding hurt within, inflicted upon the squeezing valves of his heart, and he couldn't understand why.

Why, despite all the crap she put him through, didn't Bella choose him? Why did he got to Seattle and not Michigan, California, or something place in Canada? Why didn't he want to go further away? Why couldn't he imprint? Why was trying to give his heart to Nessie so damn difficult? Why was she always so familiar to him? Why did he feel like that he actually knew her?

His legs moved faster, trailing after the carrying wind and closer to her, the girl he knew that he was never meant to be with. But damn it all to hell, every fiber of his being needed her heart in return, and he knew that she would give it to him freely, without reservations, because she was born to love. Although, it would be too hypocrital of him to just take it when he couldn't give her his own. Jacob was close—so close, too close—that his self was slipping right out of his hands and into hers. The closer he got, though, to finally telling Renesmee the truth, the more he thought this love was impossible—crazy-and he wanted to clutch his sanity.

* * *

><p><em>They were all just sitting around now, with a death sentence hanging over each of their heads like a thick, heavy rain cloud. <em>

_Alice, the Cullen's personal psychic, had foreseen it all, the peril they were in. The Volturi, was was the vampire version of a government according to Edward, had been wrongly informed that the Cullens had created an immortal child, and it was only a matter of time until the so-believed immortal child was to be terminated, along with her family. Alice saw it and warned them, but was gone the next morning with Jasper in tow. _

_Renesmee hadn't taken it so well when Bella and Edward had broken the news to her, and spent the better part of the day sobbing into multiple family member's tee shirts. When Jacob had been told of everything, he initially could only feel bitter. The little girl, sweet and innocent Nessie, was harmless. Anyone who stopped to give her a real chance would know that. She was wonderful—always smiling and ready to play. Why couldn't these bloodsuckers see her the way she was?_

_But then, catching sight of his imprint's glistening eyes had softened him up instantly. His heart could barely handle it, and when Nessie begged him to stay, Jacob came very close to crying, too. How could he refuse her? Rosalie took the sad girl away from him, as everyone tried to comfort her. Eventually, she calmed down before dinner time, so Esme could get some food into her. Now, she was busy at the counter, drawing and coloring, while everyone else recounted Alice and Jasper's departure._

_Edward pace back and forth, stroking his fingers through his reddish-brownish locks and gently pulled at the roots. "I can't believe they just left like that."_

"_Who? Alice and Jasper?" As soon as the question left Jacob's mouth, he wished he could take it back, but his thoughts were blurry and scattered._

_His attention was entirely focused on Nessie, expecting another break down at any minute. She seemed okay. Okay, but not her normal happy self. There was a tight frown etched on her tiny face, her cheeks were still flushed from the drying stream of sorrow, and she wasn't frollicking all over the place._

"_No, dog," Edward muttered sarcastially. "Han Solo and Chewbacca. Of course Alice and Jasper!"_

"_Take it easy, Edward."_

"_Oh. Sorry, Jacob. I. . ."_

"_Don't sweat it. I know."_

"_Thank you."_

"_The mutt's scent must have finally scared them off," Rosalie scoffed, wrinkling her nose as she walked by to bring Nessie a glass of water. It was a half-hearted insult, he could tell by the way she couldn't make eye contact with anyone._

_He played along with her, like nothing was wrong because their daily bickering was routine for Nessie. "Stuff it, Blondie."_

"_Go home, mongrel," she replied._

"_Make me," Jacob fired back._

"_Be nice, you two," Esme chided them, looking like she could use a nap, if only she could take one. "A sweet, little girl is present."_

_Nessie glanced up from her drawing, managing a small simper for her strigoi grandmother. Esme blew a kiss at her and winked._

"_We all miss them, but why did they leave?" Bella inquired, staring off into space._

"_Maybe they couldn't handle the pressure of dyi-" Jacob stopped mid-sentence when Edward and Bella glanced at him, and he gulped. "I mean, danger. It's a really big sacrifice, even if you love someone more than your own life."_

"_I don't think so," Emmett said. "They love the little bug. Japser and Alice just doesn't make any sense."_

_Jacob exhaled. "Yeah, it does."_

"_You have exceptional experience in skipping town when the going gets rough, don't you, fleabag? Not that any of us would be distressed if you did that again," Rosalie huffed, fluttering to her husband's side, who wrapped his arms around her waist from behind and rested his chin on her shoulder._

_Nessie's frown deepened, fixating on Jacob in sadness._

"_She's joking, sweetheart," Edward cut in automatically, before a single tear could escape. "Jacob would never leave you."_

"_Exactly," Jacob vowed, grinning at his favorite girl midget. She looked away, and that hurt him. "What I'm trying to say is that all of you were human once, too, and the natural human instinct is to head the other direction when there's danger."_

"_I guess leaving is easier when you're not responsible for another life," Edward said dubiously. _

"_Tell me about it," Jacob mumbled, and puffed out a breath. "I'm an Alpha now. I have to tell others how to survive, and if I mess up my mistakes could potentially cost an innocent's life or the life of my pack brothers." Not a simple business. Yes, he had way more freedom and was happy that he didn't have to follow Sam around anymore, but that meant more responsibilites. "I'm required to have all this assurance and belief in myself that I don't have most of the time."_

"_I believe in you, Jacob," came Nessie's voice chipperly. A big grin spread acrossed Jacob's expression like butter. It was a seldom occurance when Nessie utilized her voice since she still prefered to practice her power, but when she did, she strategized her words carefully. She never said anything that she didn't mean._

_Jacob walked over to her. Nessie hopped off the chair and opened her arms up for Jacob's massive frame, then hugged him around his neck. "Thanks for the voite of confidence, kiddo."_

* * *

><p>Home. To her. To his Nessie. That's where he was—where he wanted to be most in the world, where he belonged.<p>

Before he could enter through the door, he could smell the sweet strawberry scent of the her. It intoxicated him, illuminating his senses to beckon him even further to her—a few, mere steps. His heart thumped audibly, speeding up to the point he where his temperature skyrocketed. Jacob could feel his palms start to sweat in a familiar anticipation. He was drowning in his own head, the world tossed and turned as his vision churned until his hand extended toward the doorknob, and opened the door wide. Nessie sat on the couch, setting a book down on the coffee table as she smiled, and put the sun the same; it was dull in comparison. The mystified, stupified shape-shifter attempted to return the smile, but failed. She studied Jacob, concerned. Her lips moved, asking him a question, but he couldn't hear the words.

Jacob's knees gave out, his eyes rolling to the back of his head as his body hit the ground. And for one second, a second that meant nothing at all, he could remember everything.

_If I wonder til I die_

_May I know whose hand I'm in_

_If my home I'll never find_

_And let me live again_

_The longer I run_

_The less I find_

_Selling my soul for a nickel and dime_

_Breaking my heart to keep from singing these rhymes_

_And losing again_


	37. It's All Coming Back To Me

**Disclaimer: Nothing belongs to me... Right now. This is my favorite song by Celine Dion.**

_There were moments of gold_

_And there were flashes of light_

_There were things I'd never do again_

_But then they'd always seem right_

_There were nights of endless pleasure_

_It was more than any laws allow_

_This was it, the moment of truth. _

_Time to come home._

_With a timid step through the doorway, Jacob officially returned after fourteen days of non-stop running, to try and hunt that yellow butt down. _

_Stupid yellow butt._

_He had lured her into a den somewhere off in Takoma, pretending to limp, and to his glee, she bought the bait. Once she followed him deep inside of the dark cavern with her high and mighty disposition, she cackled just as a wart-faced witch would when she actually found him. Taking the opportunity to pounce, Jacob tore a claw into her golden skin tissue, over her bare belly. A screech echoed through the cave, piercing the never-ending silence. _

_Faethra could only glare at him in a bitter, foiled fury before escaping; but this time, there was a burgundy trail following her every footprint, and she had slowed down. Jacob wouldn't stop until Renesmee was safe from Faethra. He didn't want to stop._

_Somehow, Faethra had won again. Somehow, for the time being, she had ruined Jacob's plot to end her life. Somehow, though, another chance would show itself, and then she would be history. Somehow, Faethra would slip up in a drastic way, and there would be no turning back. Somehow, she would go down, perhaps not easily, but she would fall._

_Eventually._

_All he had to do was wait._

_Then, he would strike. _

_No mercy would be shown. No reluctance. No time for her to get away. _

_Just pure battle, and there would be no trace left that Faethra ever existed._

_But he looked forward to coming home to a nice, warm, cozy house, delicous food, and a wife that was sure to be happy to see him. She would greet him at the door with a big hug, hold him in her arms forever, and kiss him until the world ended. They would spend the night buried between sheets, or rather, buried in each other. Jacob would show his beautiful Nessie how much he truly longed for the sensitivity of her touch—time away from her was unbearable. Just one instant less of their eternity together, but he would make it up to her._

_Everything would be spectacular, of course. Nessie was bound to have missed him for all that time. _

_There was nothing that could spoil the night, right?_

_Wrong. _

_He was totally and completely wrong._

_Damn it. Crap. Damn it. Crap. Damn it. Crap, crap, crap._

"_Hey! Nessie, I'm home!" Jacob exclaimed in jubilation._

_She was in the living room, dusting the mantle. The hybrid casually glanced at him over her shoulder in an emotionless, bored recognition, as if she wasn't impressed or even overjoyed that he was back. Renesmee nodded at him. "Hi. I'm about to get started on dinner."_

"_Cool. What are we having?" _

_Truthfully, Jacob half-expected for Nessie to prepare food for only herself, but she wouldn't do that to him. She wasn't cruel or spiteful._

"_Teriyaki chicken and steamed rice."_

"_Great. I'm starving."_

"_No shock there."_

"_Well, when you married me, you also married my stomach."_

"_I guess I wasn't fully aware what I was getting myself into?"_

_Uh-oh. Jacob sensed darker subtext there. He gulped. _

"_Um, are you okay?"_

"_Yeah. . ."_

"_Are you sure?"_

"_You should get washed up a little."_

"_Sure thing, sweetie. I love you."_

_Huff, sigh, huff, huff, deep inhale. Nessie curtly tilted her head at him, and responded icily, "I love you, too." _

_But she meant it, though. Whatever Jacob had done wrong, there was hope for redemption. She loved him. That's what mattered most._

_Above forty-five minutes later, Nessie and Jacob sat at the dinner table as he commented on how much he missed her cooking, to which she hadn't bothered to respond to; and for the remainder of the meal, an ominous, uncomfortable silence befell their mouths, not even a peep. The only sounds to be heard was the scraping of knives and forks against the China plates and ice clinking together in their drinks. It gave the shape-shifter a headache. His mind thundered, pounding until he was certain that the world would implode._

_What was Nessie uptight about? Why wasn't she giddy to the bone that he was home? Did she miss him at all? Did she really care? What was her problem? Was there something else going on that he couldn't figure out? Had time time apart caused Nessie to realize that she was better off alone than with him?_

_During supper, Jacob would glance up to study the contours of Nessie's face, examining how she chewed her food with her ladylike, Cullen-esque manners, savoring the sweet flavor without being too pleased at all. Nothing out of the ordinary. Her eyes were fixated on the plate, never once looking back at him—no interest in whatsoever. _

_Nessie didn't fuss over Jacob as she normally would have,asking him a million questions about his well-being, peppering his lips in affectionate kisses, and luring him to their bedroom. _

_The behavior she displayed now was beyond bewildering until he realized, a few minutes later, that she was infuriated. Suddenly, it was blatant to him. Jacob knew Nessie and how. . . Well, if he put himself in her shoes, he wouldn't have been so delighted if Nessie disappeared for two weeks. But damn it, it's not like he walked out on her. Jacob was trying to keep her safe from Faethra's wrath. It was a completely unselfish act. _

_He loved her. Of course, he loved her. _

_But Jacob had to at least try to catch Faethra. He had gone all that time with a single scrap of food, and every inch of him ached in depravation of sweet sleep. _

_Couldn't Nessie try to see things from his point of view, too? Or show some appreciation? Was that really so much to ask for? Could she just put off being angry at him for one night? Anything! _

_Anything would do—to rescue his eardrums from this awful quiet._

_After dinner, Jacob volunteered to clean up. Nessie had waved her hand to and fro, gently shoving him into the living room whilst mentioning how exhausted he must have been and should opt to relax. Believing she was merely testing him, Jacob attempted to get himself back into the kitchen, yet that appeared to tick Nessie off, so he gave up. Jacob settled himself on the couch, secretly deliberating that this was a safe spot to sleep if Nessie hadn't already built him a doghouse out in the backyard yet. _

_Then, he grabbed for the remote control, switched the television on, and tried to enjoy a movie, but his ears could only listen to the noises of his wife's dispirited exhales of annoyance as she scrubbed roughly at the dishes. He contemplated whether or not getting her to let off steam on him would be wise._

_Although, perhaps Jacob didn't exactly know what he had forced Nessie to suffer through, during a fortnight that felt like a dreadful eternity to her._

_This feeling—this fear—was new to Jacob. _

_Never before had he been afraid of being in the same room with his imprint, or was terrified of a conversation—most likely, confrontation—with her. Sure, they had argued before, given each other the cold shoulder, and had endured the uh-oh zone that was also well known as the silent treatment. What couple didn't put one another through that? That's life. But this was a different situation, not in a way that was clear to Jacob. _

_There wasn't any easy resolution or a compromise they could reach, and Jacob couldn't undo the fact that he left._

_Still, he had to try something._

"_Would you just talk to me already?" Jacob huffed, turning off the tv as Renesmee walked into the living room to spray some Febreeze around the house, as if she was a normal housewife. Yeah, right. "Nessie. . . Look, I know you're upset."_

_Oh, that caught her attention. Nessie's head whipped around to look at him, and Jacob took a moment to absorb the ferocity dripping from her expression. Jeeze. What had he gotten himself into? _

"_Upset? I'm upset? Is that what I'm feeling, Jake? Oh, that's an understatement," she exhaled, her milk chocolate irises darkening to a sleak onyx. "I am livid right now! How could you be so stupid?"_

"_I had to go, Nessie!" Jacob defended himself, arising from the couch. He and Nessie stood in the center of the room, exchanging dirty looks. "I finally wounded Faethra. She was slowing down!"_

"_Yeah, how did that work out for you, Jacob? She's still not dead, is she?" The corners of the half-vampire half-human's mouth twitched upward, smirking sarcastically. "When are you going to get it through that thick skull of yours that Faethra is never going to stop until one of us is dead? So, what the hell do you decide to do about it? You follow her all the way to Toronto for two whole weeks!" she exploded at him, her face going red in rage. "Alone!"_

"_I knew what I was doing, all right? I'm not a child," Jacob replied, sneering acrimoniously. His jaw locked, and he shook his head._

"_Then, why do you insist on acting like one, Jacob? For kicks? Or is being married to me so bad that you actually have a death wish?" The hybrid bellowed, glaring daggers at her husband._

"_Well, excuse me, Nessie," he responded sardonically through gritted teeth. "Excuse me for giving a damn about you. Excuse me for going out of my way to protect you. Excuse me for not living up to your standards as an unpaid bodyguard. I'll do better next time."_

"_Don't you give me any of that crap, Jacob Ephraim Black." Oh, crap. She was full-naming, effectively turning this into a matter of pride. "For two weeks, I waited around here for a text, a call, an email, a freaking message in a bottle, or a note tied to a pigeon's ankle—anything!—to let me know that you were safe!"_

"_I couldn't stop for any of that shit," Jacob replied, rolling his eyes. "I had a job to do. I didn't get her, but that part is my only regret."_

_Renesmee swallowed, and turned around. She nervously fidgeted with a little bouquet of yellow lillies in an orange vase that Emily made them as a wedding present. Her fingers played with the long, green stems, as if she was contemplating her next move._

_Then, Nessie gripped tenaciously at the base of the vase, turning back to Jacob tauntingly slow. A long, frightening silence lingered between them, until she pitched the object right over his head, and then it smashed against the wall. The clay shattered to the ground, the water flourished out, and the lillies scattered everywhere, along with their lost petals. _

"_You have got to be kidding me!" she ejected. "I sat here in this house, worrying myself half to death, and wondered if I was ever going to see you again!"_

"_Well, I'm here now, aren't I? Although, I'm starting to think that I'd rather be back out there or anywhere else as long as it's not here. Obviously, you didn't have to worry. I can take care of myself," Jacob stated in agitation. _

_At some point, he figured out that it would have been smart to give his wife a few beats to calm down or should have been begging for her mercy already._

"_Yeah, but I did," Renesmee replied, emitting a short, ironic laugh. She shrugged, sighing flatly. "I sure had to suffer for your irresponsibility, and now I feel like a damn fool for it. Why do I bother? You don't even care!" _

"_I do care. I wouldn't have busted my ass if I don't care about you, Nessie," Jacob countered, clenching his jaw. How the hell could she say that to him? That he didn't care? "You're full of it if you honestly think that I abandoned you for a frollick in the woods."_

_The half-breed shook her head, pursing her lips before tracing a fingernail under her bottom eyelashes. "What is a marriage to you, Jacob? Huh? We are supposed to be a team—we share a partnership. But that doesn't mean squat to you, does it? You take off and I have to rely on someone from the pack to keep tabs of didn't bother to take anybody with you to have your back. Why did we even get married if you didn't want to play by the rules?"_

_Ouch. That hit him—kah-pow!—below the belt._

_It should have been a sign to back off, but Jacob's brain could no longer process reality, and he was exasperated from all this fighting. _

_The next thing he said would forever be known as the stupidest load of crap he would ever spout. "Divorce me, Nessie! Leave me if I'm such a horrible, worthless, wreckless husband! Whatever! Go ahead!"_

_Her beautiful milk chocolate irises widened in astounded hurt, and both of them could only stand there dumbfounded at the words jetting back and forth. Jacob had never felt like such a moron before. He couldn't even believe himself. . . He didn't know why he said that. A divorce? Why would he want one of those? He loved being married to Nessie. _

_Oh, god._

_Nessie's eyes glazed over, tears spilling over. "You know what? I'm exhausted. I'm going to bed."_

"_Wait, Nessie."_

"_Save it, Jake."_

"_But I'm-"_

"_I don't want to hear it."_

"_I didn't-"_

"_Good night."_

_It was no use to apologize Renesmee right now, not if she didn't want one. Her husband had idiotically uttered the second most painful thing her ears would ever listen to. She had every right to be pissed off at Jacob—him and his stupid pride and his dumb foot-friendly mouth. With a heavy sigh, Jacob cleaned up the broken vase from the floor, and then took a shower. _

_He pondered endlessly over the night's events, knowing very well that he was wrong from the beginning. Nessie—bless her heart—was earnestly attempting to give him an easy time when he came home, but he felt the need to screw up the kind gesture. At least, however, Jacob got Nessie to tell him the truth. It was out in the open, and it rolled over his head._

_Jacob walked into their shared room, spying his soul mate's figure lying on her side. He knelt down to her bedside. "Nessie. . ."_

"_What do you want?" she questioned tiredly, opening her eyes._

"_I'm sorry," the shape-shifter apologized, drawing her delicate hands into his, and thumbed tenderly over each of her knuckles. "God, Nessie, I'm so sorry. You're right. I should have brought someone with me. I should have called you or something. Going after Faethra wasn't worth it, not after hurting you. I'm sorry, Nessie."_

"_Go to sleep, Jacob," the hybrid murmured._

"_I'm an idiot, Nessie. You should kick my ass. What I did was stupid. What I said was stupider. I'm sorry. Please, forgive me? I hurt you, but it was never my intention. I just wanted to end our misery with this whole damn problem," Jacob elucidated pleadingly, but it wasn't enough. "You know how my temper is."_

_Renesmee's face contorted into an expression of irritation, sitting up. "I don't care about your temper. I'll never forget about those things that you said."_

_He sighed, placing a light kiss on her left hand. "I know. It's not an excuse, and it's not fair to you. Everything I did, well, it wasn't to ever hurt you. I thought I was doing the right thing. I wanted to be the best for you, to protect you, but I screwed up."_

"_I know why you did it," Nessie replied, tightening her grasp on Jacob's hands._

_He noticed her ire melting away, Renesmee's mood softening in reaction to his touch—so beautiful in the dim light, wearing a lavender nightgown, on the hugged her full breasts snuggly and was riding up her vanilla-creme legs._

"_And about that divorce comment-"_

_Shaking her head to and fro, the girl-woman's autumn swung and cascaded over her shoulders. "You didn't mean it." Renesmee leaned forward as her index fingerl touched the smooth corner of Jacob's cheek. Instinctively, a grin plastered his face, allowing her finger to roam to his chin. "It was said in the heat of the moment. You don't need to apologize anymore, Jacob. It's okay."_

"_Yes, I do, Nessie, and no, it's not okay," Jacob retorted, pressing his doting lips against her knees._

"_Jacob," Nessie whispered, tugging him toward the bed to join her—over her. "Everything is fine."_

"_No, don't do that," he answered, flipping their positions easily. "Don't let me off the hook. What I did and all those things I said, it was all out of line. I'm sorry. Please, don't divorce me. I love you, and I would go to fucking crazy without you. I wouldn't know what to do. So, just stay. If you go, I just have myself and I would hate myself for letting you get away from me. Don't leave me."_

"_What?" Nessie giggled, resting her forehead upon his. "That is ridiculous. You are absurd. I would never leave you. I don't want a stupid divorce, Jacob. I want you. I love you."_

_He grabbed the back of Nessie's knees, causing her to readily straddle his hips with a hungry need. Jacob's body grew unbearably warm with Nessie on top of him, and sat up, mashing their chests together. Two sets of browns eyes, rich and magnificent and full of love, blazed like hot iron, and they lit each other's souls on fire._

"_I love you, too," Jacob stated, as his hands slipped up his imprint's nightgown. He caressed the flower petal texture of her slender waist, then looped a digit through her cotton panties, and snapped the material._

"_I missed you, Jacob," the hybrid admitted nervously, her legs trembling in anticipation. Her heartbeat picked up, biting down on her bottom lip. "You're my Jacob. I. . . I'm sorry I blew up at you, and threw that vase at you. I was so frightened while you were away. If I ever lost you, I couldn't imagine what my life would become. And I just missed you."_

"_I missed you, too," he aid. Jacob licked his lips, readjusting Nessie's hips. "Every moment while I was out there. I'm sorry."_

_Her aroused aroma surged, wafting thickly through the air, as a breath hitched sharpy in the back of her throat. "Will you stay with me from now on?"_

"_For as long as you want me," Jacob retorted, feeling the vibrance of his soul submerge deep into the walls of his Nessie's own soul. "Longer than that."_

"_Good," Nessie nodeeded. "Then don't ever leave me again."_

"_Never," he promised; a vow that wouldn't go unpunished by the laws of nature, but neither were aware yet. "You have my word. Never ever again."_

"_Thank you—for coming back."_

"_I would always come for you."_

"_And I would come for you, too. Nothing could stop me. Wherever you are, I will always find you."_

"_Stalker."_

"_Shut up."_

"_I am glad I came home, but there is one more place I'd really like to go. . ."_

"_Jacob Black, does that have a double meaning?"_

"_Yes, Nessie Black. You bet."_

_Nessie giggled before their mouths connected and glided over each other's, moaning in glee when her womanhood instinctively embraced Jacob around his erected, proud staff. Both of the hybrid's hands wrapped around Jacob's; their bodies moved together in flawless synchronization, as Nessie rolled her hips over his in tender desperation, as the shape-shifter thrust up into all the right places. _

_Instant by instant, the sizzling desire betwixt their centers increased while a delicious shiver rocketed up her spine, causing her core to further squeeze Jacob's member. He grunted loudly, as Nessie completely detached their bodies, and then slammed back down roughly._

_This was what people referred to as magic—everything between them. A pull. There was a strong, magnetic force that kept drawing Jacob's aching manhood deeper and deeper into Renesmee's into her drenched opening until the pair was practically pleading for sweet release. _

_Jacob pulsated within Nessie, their pace quickening to a super sonic speed. Nessie's porcelain skin began to glow, smiling as an orgasm streamed throughout her entire body. Her shell-pink lips formed an 'O'; as she quivered around his length, making him follow suit._

"_Mmm, Jacob. . . I love you," she groaned sweetly, the sound echoing off the bedroom walls and into his memory. "I love you, Jacob. Jacob. My Jacob," Nessie sighed into his ear, riding out her high. "Oh, Jacob."_

* * *

><p>Jacob remembered every last detail of their lives together, every last detail.<p>

All of his memories played on fast-forward, rattling his brain with an overload of information—the innocent baby that had him under her spell from before the beginning; the little girl that couldn't get enough of the fluffy, russet Alpha and made a hobby out of riding his back around the forest like a wild stallion; the confused in-betweenager who was continuously questioning her worth and about where she belonged in the world forever, but always had her Jacob to talk to, someone that never denied for comfort; the beautiful, carefree teenager that loved to dance no matter who was watching and loved gazing out into the sapphire ocean on their cliff, using Jacob's shoulder as a pillow; and finally, the woman she became, the one that agreed to marry him—til death do they part. His light, his strength, his Nessie.

He remembered the sweet scent of Nessie's alabaster skin, always smelling of some sort of fruit, sunlight, and almond milk. The whole house smelt of Nessie. Home. He remembered that night, too—how his wife's body felt against his as they reunited from their long separation, how perfect she always was. God, he loved her.

Jacob just wanted to keep his eyes closed and dream of Renesmee, the love of his life in any reality they were put in, but still, his heart was saddened as she listened to Nessie—this Nessie, alive in the wrong world—beckon him to awaken. Rememberance of his imprint—his soul mate—made him yearn for their past—for what was, but had to alter what must be. Jacob needed Nessie, but it hurt him too much to love her. But she kept running around in his head. Nessie. . .

Remember.

Don't remember.

I have to. Nessie. . .

Stop it.

But I love her.

Yeah. Your love got us into this mess.

I remember now.

Then, quit 's why we can't remember. All that pain.

No, it was my fault.

Your fault is my fault. I am you, Jacob. Because of us, we lost her.

I love her. I've missed her every damn day of my life.

Our love can't save her this way.

What am I supposed to do?

Leave.

I can't. I just can't leave anymore.

You have to! She'll die if you don't! Forget about Nessie and leave!

No! Wait!

And just like that, it was all gone again—deleted and erased when he opened his eyes.

"Jacob!" Nessie exclaimed, raking her fingernails through Jacob's raven hair. "Can you hear me? Jacob, please wake up! Please? Say something to me!"

"We've really got to stop meeting like this," he joked, coughing.

She laughed heartily, planting tiny kisses all over his face. "Oh, Jacob! Are you okay?"

"Sure, sure. I'm just fine and dandy," Jacob answered with a tired chortle, "except for the pounding headache."

Renesmee exhaled lightly in relief, slowly assisting Jacob to his feet. "What happened to you?"

"I don't know," The Quileute man replied groggily, and flopped down on the couch. "I-I-I could only think about how much I wanted to come home." Not that he truly thought Charlie's house was home to him. Nessie was, however. "When I saw you, I felt overwhelmed, kind of like I was imprin. . ." Nessie's lips pursed, her gorgeous mahogany orbs widening suspicously. "Nevermind."

It was impossible.

"Right,"she said, nodding. "Both of us had a rough day. You're probably tired."

Jacob grinned slyly, gently tugging on Nessie's arms to bring her closer to him. He wanted the comfort of her proximity, warm and sweet. "Yeah, that's it."

"You need to relax," Nessie smiled back, trailing her fingers up and down his chest. "Maybe I can help?"

"Oh, really? How do you propose to do that?" Jacob inquired in feigned curiosity, arching an eyebrow.

"Don't get all raunchy on me, you horn dog," Nessie giggled, though she was was adjusting her position—straddling his right knee, to tease him, as she brushed her hand over the crotch of his shorts. "I was to going to suggest getting you a glass of water, preparing a nice meal for you,or giving you a massage. Fully clothed, that is."

"The last one sounds nice."

"Mhmm."

"But you know what would really relax me?"

"Sure, Jake. What's that?"

"I could give a massage, except I want you to be naked."

"I think we could do that."

"Fantastic! Let's go get you naked!"

The shape-shifter and half-breed wandered to the guest room, locking the door behind them. As soon as the lock mechanism clicked into place, the animal inside Jacob broke loose. Before he was even aware of what he was doing, Nessie was sandwiched between him and the wall. It was as if he was transformed into some horny teenager, drunk on spiked punch and in love, making out with the most beautiful girl in school. She made his temperature straight into the dancing, burning flames of the yellow sun, drowning him in the goodness of her kiss—slowly sliding her tongue over his, and he tasted every solitary centimeter of Renesmee's mouth.

Jacob's blood pumped violently southward, his copper skin nearly bursting from feverish need. The need to hear his named constantly spilling from Nessie's melodic voice, theneed to make her cry from ignited pleasure, the need to watch Nessie fall back between white linen sheets and pillows, the need to never let her disappear from his arms in the serenity of afterglow, the need to say what he needed to say.

He gripped the back of Nessie's legs and carried her over to the mattress. She slowed down their pace immensely, molding their mouths together and then entwining them in a tender fervor. Jacob soaked into her fragrance to his memory, breathing her into his storming heart. He wanted to take her—maybe that wasn't the right way to phrase it. He wanted to be with her, share himself with her every way imaginable.

And then, Jacob felt a single droplet of warm liquid crawl down his cheek. He pulled away, baffled and concerned by his girl's tears. Nessie opened her eyes, and Jacob wasn't certain about what he was seeing. Her eyes were filled to the brim, reddened and sad—scared. Jacob didn't know what to say, so he didn't say a word; Jacob didn't know what to do, so he touched his lips lovingly against the apple of Nessie's cheek and hugged her close, keeping her protected.

_The flesh and the fantasies_

_All coming back to me_

_I can barely recall_

_But it's all coming back to me_

_If you forgive me all this_

_If I forgive you all that_

_We forgive and forget_

_And it's all coming back to me now_


	38. Fall to Pieces

**Disclaimer: Nothing in the following story belongs to me, but hopefully, I will one day have a great, original story people would write fanfiction for. That would be super duper awesome. Song by Avril Lavigne.**

_You're the only one_

_I'd be with til the end_

_When I come undone_

_You bring me back again_

_Back under the stars_

_Back into your arms_

"You're my Jacob, right?"

"Who else would I be?"

"Another version of you. A-A-Alive, I think.

"I don't follow."

"Who you're meant to be without me."

"What the hell is that supposed to mean, Nessie?"

"N-N-Nessie? Nessie. . . That sounds so familiar. You used to call me that all the time."

"Yeah. . . That's my nickname for you, remember?"

"Yes, I know, but. . . when did you come up with that name?"

"A couple of days ago."

"Oh, yes. I remember that now. You hated me."

"Not really."

"You did. That I remember perfectly."

"I'm sorry."

"I know you are."

"Is everything okay, Nessie?"

"Jacob. . .?"

"What's going on with you?"

"Nothing. I promise. Forget I said anything. I'm just. . . Tired."

For the rest of the night, Jacob and Renesmee remained in total silence, uncomfortable as it was. She wasn't up for a discussion, and he wouldn't press her on it. His poor Nessie just walked around in a zombie-like state, appearing out of place and out of step in Charlie's house—like her mind was lost in an evil fog of swimming thoughts.

The glow in her gorgeous ebony irises had dimmed every single time she glanced in Jacob's direction, her feet slowly dragged along the carpet, her voice spoke in a dull monotone, and the cute pink color that usually was present in her round cheeks was drained. It's almost as if Nessie wasn't herself—not even there.

When they, at last, fell asleep, Nessie commented on how the sheets felt cold, which was code for, "Will you please hold me tonight, please?"

Naturally, Jacob blanketed the half-human half-vampire girl tightly in the warmth of his arms, holding her throughout the darkened night. It didn't take them long to wander off to a land of fancy and free fantasy, with Jacob spooned against her body. Every fiber of his being was ready to oblige Nessie's every whim, protectively cocooning his body around hers.

He promised Nessie security, he promised her the universe, he promised that he would never let go of her, he promised her his heart and soul; she was free to take whatever she needed from him, all that she had to do was merely ask. There wasn't anything he could think of that he would ever deny Nessie; but Jacob never said so out loud. Any hints of bravery were gone from his body and he was unsure if he would ever work up the guts to finally tell Nessie the depth of his feelings for her.

Jacob was the first to awake that next morning, reluctant to release the fine paradise incarnate from his grasp, but he knew that he needed to.

Today, he was on a mission—to allow his Nessie the liberty to seek solace within him where she wanted to.

And there was something he wanted to ask her, positive that he already knew the answer.

"Is Ren okay?" Charlie inquired, taking two large swigs of his morning cup of coffee. "When I came home last night, she seemed. . . I don't know. . .scared? Maybe even lost. Depressed, like not all of her was here or she didn't know where she was."

"I'm not sure yet, Charlie," Jacob answered, working his way around the kitchen.

"Jacob Black, that girl is my granddaughter," Charlie began in a sternly solemn tone as he shifted his weight from foot to foot. "Do you understand that?" Jacob nodded. "Good, then you also understand that I have a right to know what's going on. You gonna tell me?"

"Do you want to know the truth?" Jacob questioned, switching on the stove and the oven, and started fixing up some food.

"Yes."

"She's a special girl, Charlie—more than that, she's special to me. That's the extent of my knowledge," was pretty much all Jacob could think to explain to Charlie.

There was only one thing he was currently focused on, and that was finding a way to cheer Nessie up. Besides, what truth did Charlie want to hear? That Jacob's intentions were absolutely clean? Oh, it was nowhere near the truth. When he wasn't making his life goal to please Nessie outside of the bedroom, all he could think about was getting her alone. That he wouldn't hurt Nessie come hell or high water? Jacob didn't want to, but he couldn't tell Charlie for sure. That he—_gulp_—was in love with her? There was no way he admitting that out loud to her grandfather. That nothing physical was going on?

Yeah, right.

Personally, Jacob kind of preferred to please Nessie within a bedroom.

It wasn't anything he could promise to anyone but Nessie. Truth. A funny word, something sticky that Jacob wasn't ready to get his hands on quite yet.

"I just want to you to remember—if you ever do anything to break her heart, I won't hesitate to load my rifle and shoot your sorry ass," Charlie threatened, chugging down the rest of his coffee.

"Will do, Chief," Jacob retorted, not really paying that much attention to him.

"Welp, I'm off to work. See you later."

Which was A-okay with Jacob. He wanted some peace and quiet to concentrate on his cooking, on pampering Nessie.

Although, Jacob suddenly realized that he didn't know much about her diet, other than she was part-bloodsucker, which meant that she would naturally prefer warm blood over normal food. Crazy, right? He barely knew if she was able to stomach most human food. What if pancakes tasted like broccoli to her?

Perhaps if the cooking didn't work out, he could allow Nessie to sample some of his blood and they could have a repeat of the other night. Despite that his ancestors were probably ceisuring in their graves, Jacob would have given his last drop of blood to Nessie, and definitely didn't mind perishing while her perfect, pink, and plump lips were attached to the base of his throat. He would glady let her suck him dry—um, his blood dry, that is.

Still, he couldn't imagine a soul that knew how to turn down the hot, delicous scent of apple-smoked bacon sizzling on a pan, scrambled eggs seasoned in chopped bellpeppers, whole grain toast lightly buttered and glazed in blueberry jelly, and muffin batter baking in the oven. All smells that caused Jacob's stomach to rumble, but he had to remember that it was all for his Nessie. He would give her a nice, gentle morning; though, he did hope she would confide in him why she behaved so strangely the previous night, but he could probably guess. But it really didn't matter whether or not Nessie wanted to talk about it, Jacob would still be there for her.

He just wanted her to be all right.

When he finished up in the kitchen, Jacob poured a batch of freshly brewed coffee into a blug mug, put everything on a tray, and carried it all to the guest room. Nessie's slender body was buried under the covers, curled up like a kitten, with her lush reddish-brownish tendrils cascading over the pillow. Her hands, folded together as if to pray, dangled over the edge.

The poor thing looked so exhausted. Jacob chortled to himself, setting down the tray on the nightstand.

He climbed into bed next to her, sweetly nuzzling his face between the feather-feeling of her cropper tresses and her alabaster neck. Jacob osculated the top of Renesmee's clavicle, brushing his lips over her soft skin, while one large hand placed over her stomach to snuggle closer. Her right leg shifted, the softest sigh released from her voice, and then she groaned. Nessie turned over to face him, stretching out her arms and legs against him, and tiredly giggled as she scooted underneath him.

Dipping his head down, Jacob captured Nessie's mouth in a lazy kiss, gentle and slow. Her hands clutched at his tee shirt and tore it to shred instantly, needing him in a brand new way. Not in a sexual way, but to be bare with him. She needed him as her comfort zone. Another groan escaped her mouth, and had to pull away before things become too serious. It was a good thing she did, too, because Jacob's south head was close to stiffening.

"Good morning, beautiful," Jacob greeted gently, fighting himself not to grope her.

Nessie sat up with Jacob. "Hmmm. . . Good morning, Jacob," she yawned, smiling at him in a manner that made his heart melt into a messy mush.

"I made breakfast for you," he told her, gesturing to the food at the bedside.

"You didn't have to do that," Nessie replied, tilting her head to the side in confusion. She pursed her lips and wore a look in her doe eyes that he couldn't quite figure out.

Jacob teasingly huffed and rolled his eyes. "Well, duh! I know that, but I wanted to do it for you, Nessie."

"Thank you," Nessie said gratefully, running a hand along his left arm, and kissed his cheek. "You're my protector and my personal chef," and her Jacob, he mentally added to her statement. Where was his contract to be her slave for the rest of his life? He wanted to sign up right now. "What will you do next?"

The shape-shifter pulled the tray over and rested it in his lap. He pinced a large crumb off a muffin and retorted, "For starters, I'm gonna make you eat. Now, open up."

Obligingly, the half-breed did as she was told and Jacob fed her a piece. Almost instantly, her milk chocolate orbs grew jovially wide and lit up. "Ooh, Jacob! That's yummy!"

He grinned, feeling irrationally humbled by her giddy approval. "It's my mom's old recipe," Jacob stated, poking at the scrambled eggs and fed some to her. "She would always add raspberry cake mix into any kind of pastry. Not a lot. Just enough to add some extra flavor."

"Your mom is a desert genius!" Nessie exclaimed, excitedly devouring a full muffin. "These are better than Esme's!"

"Yeah," Jacob chuckled lightly, letting her work on finishing breakfast by herself while he snacked on a strip of bacon. "Mom's cooking was always unbelievably good, but her deserts were the best. Her deserts were the only reason why I tolerated lima beans as a kid." He wrinkled his nose in memory, and shook his head. "It's a good thing she wrote down all her recipes."

"But you remembered this one by heart?" Nessie inquired, sounding impressed by the capabilities of his remembrance. She simpered affectionately and bit her bottom lips, a dim twinkle shining in the honey hue of her eyes.

"Yep," Jacob answered, nodding proudly. "After she died, I would read the pages inside of her cookbook on sick days when my dad made me stay home from school, reading up on her muffins." He wasn't sure what made Sarah Black's muffins so darn special, except she would sing loudly as she worked in the kitchen and let Jacob be her 'little helper.' "Muffins were her favorite breakfast food." Yeah. That was it. He loved muffins, because she did.

"They taste like happy," Nessie remarked, grabbing for another muffin and some bacon. "Soft and spongy."

So much for her sucking him dry.

For just a little while, the pair enjoyed the silence waving throughout the room. She allowed him to finish off the last of the bacon and eggs, but kept munching on the muffins. And Jacob liked it—this morning. Nessie, if she was feeling any type of inner pain, managed a plethora of breathtaking smiles that could make the icecaps thaw. He wanted a gazillion more mornings like this with Nessie, eating breakfast and relaxing in bed. But he had to admit that there was one more activity that he was curious about, one he wanted to attempt with her.

Nessie opened her mouth as though she wanted to say something, but quickly decided against it, but Jacob took the hint—there was something she was dying to get off her chest.

"What?" Jacob questioned, taking a hold of her hand and stroked his fingertips over her palm. "Tell me, Nessie."

"You know what I used to wish when I was a little girl?" Renesmee queried rhetorically, and grimaced. "I used to wish. . . Well, when I learned the whole story how my mother became pastier than usual, I wanted to a regular human." She shrugged sheepishly, the corners of her mouth twitching tightly. "Normal," she whispered with a timid laugh. "Common, like everybody else."

"Nessie," Jacob started tenderly, securely locking his dark chocolate eyes on the half-human half-vampire's porcelain face, "you could look like one of those stereotypical, frumpy librarians, blend in with a crowd of ordinary and dull people, and be human, but there is not a single feature about you that could ever be common. You are not meant to be common."

All things about this brand new creature, Nessie, was different. She was so different, but perhaps being different wasn't a flaw of hers. Damn it, Jacob loved her! He didn't know if he would been able to fall in love with Nessie so easily as he did, not if she was a dime in a dozen.

Being different—special, abnormal, out of this world, amazing—was essential to her personality, and she just wouldn't be the same if Nessie was a full human or a full vampire, but that wasn't the significant part to why he loved her. It's not what she was, it's who she was, and who she was. . . Different.

He would never wish normalcy on her.

"Thank you, Jacob."

"Is that still something you wish for?"

"Sometimes, whenever I question my place in the scheme of things, but I've realized that it doesn't matter anymore," Nessie murmured, exhaling slowly. "I'm a freak and I can't drive myself by wishing for something I'll never be. Even Rudolph had to get used to his red nose, right? I think the main reason why I wanted to be human was because I didn't want to be a monster."

God, he really regretted ever accusing her of being anything but a great girl. What the hell was he smoking? Jacob wished he knew how to build a time machine and punch himself hard in his friggin' throat.

"Hey, Nessie, um, are you okay?" Jacob finally asked, getting it out of the way. "I mean, after last night? You seemed pretty shaken up."

Nessie let out a soft cough, staring straight down at the blanket. She swallowed nervously, indeciveness glinting in her milk chocolate orbs, and finally spoke, "It was just a stressful day—Faethra, you fell through the roof of a church, Leah's attitude about us, Nahuel risking his life for me, and when you passed out for the second time. Yesterday was a marathon of drama. I didn't know what to make of it."

"This is some deep, deep trouble we're in together, Nessie," the man-wolf commented matter-of-factually.

"It was a little overwhelming. I was really scared yesterday, Jacob, through all of it," Nessie confessed, combing her delicate digits through her auburn coils.

"Definitely fooled me, Baby Cullen," Jacob said, grinning ear-to-ear at her. "You were confident and brave the whole time."

"Really? I was?" Nessie inquired increduously, raising one shoulder to her ear and playfully fluttered her eyelashes.

"You shouldn't feel obligated to pretend, Nessie," Jacob replied, and reached out to tuck a strand of loose hair behind the shell of her ear. "You'll crack like an egg if bottle up your stress." But he could and would be there to pick up the pieces, gladly yearning to put her back together again.

"I am afraid. . ." she sighed, and completed breakfast with a final bite of the last muffin. "Jacob, I trust you—I do—to be here for me; but the more time I spend with you, the closer we get, and I'll probably hate saying goodbye to you when the time comes," Nessie admitted.

Jacob chuckled halfheartedly, and set the tray elsewhere. He parted his legs widely as Nessie molded the backside of her body into his, resting against Jacob's chest. His arms closed around her stomach, deeply inhaling her scent. "There's an easy solution to that."

"Hmmm, what?"

"Don't say goodbye." Not ever. There was no need. "Seattle and Takoma are a superhuman jog away from each other," Jacob elucidated slyly, readying himself to ask her an extremely important question. "We could keep in touch and see each other on weekends, holidays, birthdays, and what not."

"What are you trying to ask me, Jacob?" There was a tone of skeptimism dripping from Renesmee's voice, which he could hardly blame her for; but if she wanted to commitment, then he would give it to her. She didn't have to be afraid of goodbye anymore, not from him. It was one simple, little thing he could do to lighten her burden.

And he wanted to.

"Will you please be my girlfriend?" Jacob queried. He tried to recall other times when he asked the same from other girls, but drew blanks. If a girl wasn't his Nessie, said girl was equivocally nothing to him. What cause was there to ever want anyone else?"

"Are you serious?"

"As a stroke."

"Am I still your Nessie?"

"I hope so."

"And are you still my Jacob?"

"Guaranteed."

The crossbreed turned her head to the side to give Jacob a light kiss on the cheek and giggled. "Yes, Jacob. A thousand times yes! Of course, I would love to be your girlfriend!"

Laughing the shape-shifter snuggled his nose right against the nape her Renesmee's neck, nibbling affectionately at the skin while Nessie, as if it were possible, backed closer into him. She arched her neck into his mouth, holding back a groan as his tongue glided over a sensitive spot, and Jacob earned a delighted mewl of pleasure.

His fingers dug into the side of her belly, tickling Nessie until her sweet laughter rang throughout the room, spreading into his soul and started laughing with her, and planted more kisses along her neck. Although, it may not have been wise, Jacob told her; Jacob brushed his lips under her earlobe, mouthing three complicated words that he couldn't say aloud yet.

"You are the most wonderful man I have ever met."

"Tell me something I don't know," he replied jokingly.

"Well, I will tell you one thing, Jacob—when you imprint one day, I know she'll be the best person in the world for you," she paused briefly, and scooted away to face him properly. "Beautiful, smart, funny, sweet—the whole package."

"You're all that and so much more," Jacob retorted, waggling his eyebrows.

"Maybe," Nessie began, her cheeks changing to an adorable lemonade-pink, "but I'm clearly not the one for you as much as I would love to be." Love? "I mean, don't you ever think about what your imprint will be like?"

"I'm not focused on that right now. I'm focused on you—my girlfriend." On her sweet raspberry lips, on her rich pools of warm chocolate candy, on her cute nose, on her ever-blushing cerise cheeks. He couldn't imagine a woman being as beautiful and wonderful as her.

"You are too good to be true," Nessie said, shaking her head playfully.

"Not really," Jacob shrugged nonchalantly. "I'm just me. Only Jacob. I'm sure the lucky sucker that ends up with you will be cool, too." Ugh. Was it supposed to hurt that much when he said that?

"I. . ." Her blush deepened beautifully; Jacob grazed his hand over her knees to give her some sort of solace, and she continued, "I don't want anybody else. Only you. Only my Jacob."

How could a single being so openly affectionate? Jacob knew that he didn't deserve Renesmee's compassion, but he was a selfish man and often craved the purity of the girl-woman's tender feelings, considering she presented them to him so freely and carlessly.

He wished that she would loan him a pinch of her courage; and there was an odd feeling that welled up in his stomach. Jealousy? Yes, jealousy. As actionable as that seemed, it was undoubtedly true. Jacob recalled something his mother once told him: "Sometimes when you love somebody and you're jealous of them, that quality is one of the things you admire most about that person—inspiring you to be a better person. What you love most about that person." Now Jacob truly understood what she was talking about. Sarah was such a wise woman. His mom would have loved Nessie.

"Are you sure?" Jacob asked Nessie, sure that his heart would pound right out of his chest.

She nodded. "Do you have the slightest comprehension how much I need you? Do you, Jacob?" Renesmee peered at hipm in disbelief, twiddling her fingers impatiently. When he shrugged bashfully in response, Nessie scoffed sardonically. "How can you not see it? How can the whole see it, but the one person I want most is so blind? Why can't I be your sun? I would lose my mind if you weren't here, Jacob. I feel safe with around and I'm not just talking about in a bodyguard way. I mean, my heart is safe, too—as long as I'm with you. But that's not true, is it?"

"Nessie," he murmured as a lowly peasant would to a Greek goddess in a sacred temple, "every part of you is always safe when you're with me," Jacob swore, tracing an 'X' across his heart.

"It doesn't matter, anyway," Nessie replied, almost bitterly. "Now is now, and you're the only man I want to spend it with."

"You're unbelievable. The things you say at times don't make any sense," he joked lightheartedly, though it was true for him.

"What's happening is unbelievable."

"And pretty great."

"Touche."

"We're freaks, you aand me. We're both two different species, never anything at the same time."

"I wish I could believe we were meant to find each other—no, I do believe," Nessie stated, lying down across the bed. "I believe that when I walked into that cafe, I was supposed to be there. Both our lives were meant to be propel forward. We're supposed to learn from each other," Nessie theorized, fixated on the ceiling fan.

The Quileute frowned in sarcasm. "There you go again—not making any sense." He loved her to death, but it seemed to him like she was rambling, not that he minded too much. Jacob could listen to Nessie drone on for ages. "Stop overanalyzing our meeting. There's not enough aspirin in the world for the headaches you're gonna give yourself. Can't you accept some things are coincidental? No explanation."

"Hmmm," Renesmee scrunched up her nose in mock deliberation. "Not only do I happen to be the offspring of your least favorite couple, but I'm also one of your sworn enemies—half of what you hate most. You're the only male heir of Emphraim Black. Despite the fact you were trying so very hard to hate my guts and that I should hate yours, we have this, albeit odd, attraction to each other. You really think all of that is random?"

Jacob stretched out his legs and lied down adjacent to her. "I think what counts is the fact you're in my life."

She smirked impishly, swinging a leg over Jacob's hips and gazed down at his copper-skinned face, and ghosted her fingernails over his cheek. "You know, Jake, if my values of virtue were askew, my virginity would have been long gone thanks to you."

Oh, good. The feeling was mutual. Renesmee's words begot a knot of lust in his stomach, lapping in the sea of his desire. "Don't tease me."

"I'm not, just stating a possibility." She obviously got a kick out of teasing him. The little minx.

"What's the difference?" Jacob asked, cocking an eyebrow.

"A part of me really wants to," Nessie answered honestly, pecking his lips. "If it's ever going to happen between us, there has to be more."

"You don't know what you're asking me," he replied,

"Maybe not," the half-breed admitted graciously, smiling her beautiful smile that was certain to turn him into a morning person, "but I won't stop trying. I don't care that my heart is in danger, because I know yours is, too. I just hope that I can be the chance you're willing to take."

"So much, Nessie. . ." Jacob told her in desperation. There was so much more he yearned from Nessie, but first he needed to learn to give her a little bit in return.

"I know," she retorted.

* * *

><p>Later on that day, after they had taken seperate showers and got ready, Jacob and Nessie lounged about the living room, sitting on the couch, and watched Forrest Gump. He glanced back and forth between the television screan and Nessie's reaction during the scene where Forrest visited Jenny's dorm. She was trying so hard not to laugh, but failed and burst out with a guffaw. Thank goodness, too, that she cracked up before he did.<p>

Then, he spotted an intriguing artifact on the coffee table. "You were reading Edward Masen's diary?"

"Oh, yeah," Nessie nodded, trying to ease her bubbly giggles. "I was reading it yesterday after Nahuel dropped me off."

"Anything interesting?"

"Nothing too enthralling," Renesmee shrugged, gesturing her hand in a so-so movement. "The diary starts when he's in his early twenties, meeting Elizabeth 'Lizzie' Krux for the first time in a Chicago cafe. She's playing hard to get," Nessie explained, perching her feet on Jacob's knees. "I stopped reading right about when he's working up the nerve to tell her how he feels about her."

"Not your favorite novel, huh?" Jacob chortled.

"No, it's sweet. It's kind of nice to know more and more about my biological grandparents, about their somewhat reluctant courtship," the girl-woman said.

"Actually," Jacob snorted, "it's kind of weird to picture Edward having parents." He realized, of course, that the notion shouldn't have been that ridiculous. Edward looked and sounded like a typical teenager, though his personality and perceptions on certain things were old-fashioned. All Jacob could see was an old man stuck in a seventeen year-old body.

"I kow what you mean," Renesmee responded, as her eyes expanded in feigned fear. "I would pay big bucks to see my father a child being scolded for having his hand in the cookie jar before supper!"

"Haha!" Jacob chuckled, slapping his knee. "Priceless!"

"Yeah," Nessie giggled lightly. "I feel like having my grandfather's diary—having his secret thoughts documented on these pages—gives me a tiny connection to both of my grandparents. This is my only way to get to know them."

"Skip to the last page," Jacob advised, shutting off the tv. "That's what I always do with every book I read. That way I know if it's a tragedyor a happy ending."

With a questioning grimace, Nessie replied, "Except that I already know that this story ends in tragedy."

"Oh," Jacob uttered dumbly, suddenly feeling like an idiot. "I'm sorry."

"No, don't be," Nessie-half smiled, shaking her head. "My father can't remember that many details from his human life, but Carlisle does remember tending to him and my grandparents." Her voice spoke softly, nearly inaudible as she arched her back. "Elizabeth knew somehow that Carlisle was different. He had the ability to play God and save her son."

"Mother's intuition?" Jacob guessed.

"It could be. Elizabeth jeopardized her own health, you know, by trying to nurse my father in the hospital. My own mother did practically the same for me," Nessie elaborated, gently tugging at her locket.

"Bella," Jacob coughed, attempting to choke back any malice he might have in saying that name, "loves you."

"I know," Nessie answered. "I love her, too."

Renesmee's Hershey irises glazed over smally, a long breathy exhale eminating right out of her chest as she shifted the direction of her sight at Edward Masen's diary. After several eternal moments of Jacob patiently waiting to see if his girlfriend would have another breakdown, she finally looked back at him—all traces of sorrow were erased from her ever-kind expression. Still, her face was pained in clear uncertainty. Nessie nibbled at the inside of her bottom lip.

Instinctively, Jacob pulled her warm body into his arms and kissed her forehead. "What's wrong?"

"I'm not sure," Nessie replied, pulling away from his embrace, though her hips clung to his. "Jacob, have you ever tried to remember something, but you couldn't? Something that you're not sure even happened?"

"Yeah. Increasingly," Jacob retorted, furrowing his eyebrows.

"I feel like that," Renesmee started, pursing her lips together tightly and blew a raspberry. "Sometimes—well, during certain moments—I hear my mom crying." She paused, touching his hand and transmitted her thoughts into his. A whole new world, a vague one, opened up. He, or Nessie, was surrounded in a bizarre, painful combination of scorching heat and clammy cold. A silver ray of light blinded him, stinging his retinas, but the ringing sound of Bella's dry sobs whistled in the air. "I don't dream about these things. They're more like flashes through my mind. It's a memory that I can't remember."

The visions ended and Jacob's sight returned to Nessie. "Let's keep it that way."

"It's stupid, honestly, and probably nothing," Nessie said, twirling circles into her copper tendrils.

"I will keep you safe, Nessie," Jacob promised reassuringly. "You can count on me."

"Well, duh," Nessie exclaimed mockingly, rolling her eyes. "I don't doubt you."

"Good."

Just then, Nessie's cell phone began to vibrate on the cofee table and she immediately answered it, but a pang in Jacob's body told him an element was out of place. "Hey, Daddy. What's up? . . . Um, why? Is everything okay? . . . She did what?! On her own! . . . Okay, okay. Fine. I'll be there as soon as possible. Bye. . . I love you, too."

"What's going on?" Jacob questioned.

Nessie arose from the couch with a sense of urgency, frantically heading toward the door. "My dad wants me to run to Takoma. My mom went to look for the hind yesterday and still hasn't returned."

Jacob automatically snarled. "Not alone you're not."

"Fine, whatever. Let's get out of here," she replied, rushing him out of the house. "She could be in danger and it's my fau-"

"We're gonna find her, Nessie. Everything is gonna be okay. You'll see."

_I don't wanna fall to pieces_

_I just wanna sit and stare at you_

_I don't wanna talk about it_

_And I don't wanna a conversation_

_I just wanna cry in front of you_

_I don't wanna talk about it_

_Because I'm in love with you_


	39. Monster

**Disclaimer: Nothing belongs to me. Song by Meg and Dia.**

_His little whispers_

_Love me, love me_

_That's all I ask for_

_Love me, love me_

_He battered his tiny fists to feel something _

_Wondered what it's like to touch_

_And feel something_

The shape-shifter and vampire hybrid charged through the forest, like two arrows whistling through the dusty air. Clouds, feathery and colored like a thousand purple bruises, shielded the warm rays of the flaxen sun. A fulvous light glistened across the ground, leading the creatures to the City of Destiny.

In a tizzy, the animals scattered about, racing to hide in the trees and the holes underground, scared. Birds tucked their young deep within their nests, spreading their wings as wide as a frisbee. Does and their fawns concealed themselves in small, secure thickets.

They all sensed danger was impregnating their habitat—invading their land—and they followed their instincts.

A million scenarios raced through the youthful Cullen's brain, quietly contemplating what could have possibly caused her mother to behave so foolishly—to go off and find the golden hind all by herself, without Edward or at least Alice. Bella wasn't normally the impulsive or wreckless sort of vampire; she was smart. Usually, she exercised control, restraint, and good sense, strategizing for an outcome that would benefit everybody, but this was a suicide mission.

If no one interceded soon, surely Bella was not liable to survive an encoutner with Faethra. It was of the utmost importance that Jacob and Nessie assisted the rest of the Cullen coven in finding Bella as quickly as possible.

Was there a particular reason why she had gone after Faethra on her own?

Had she somehow illusioned herself into believing that she could handle this fight without any kind of back up?

Did she lose her mind?

Nessie wondered what danger her mother was in.

What if Faethra captured Bella and was torturing her?

What if she was slowly dying somewhere?

No. No. She couldn't allow herself to think such things. It would make her ill, in more ways than one, and there was no time for that.

But she had to admit that there was something she didn't trust, a warning signaling in blinding neon colors through her mind. A bad sensation churned around in the pit of her stomach as her heart pumped vapidly in a state of fright.

Could it be that something horrible was going to happen, was happening, or had it already happened?

Nessie struggled to recall Jacob's words of promise and reassurance.

"Everything is going to be okay," he had said, cupping her cheeks before bolthing out the door like he couldn't wait to get away from her and burst out of his skin. She believed in him, which may have been a naïve decision like everyone precautioned; but nevertheless, she held on to her instinctive faith. Jacob wouldn't let anything terrible happen to her or her family. That she knew for a fact, even if everybody else didn't.

Now, what did Edward say?

"Renesmee, you must come home immediately! Your mother has endangered herself by trying to hunt down the golden hind! Meet me by the Cave of Fear! Hurry!"

It was curious. Her father's voice was constantly smooth and velvety, but in his apparent worry for his wife, he hadn't been able to maintain the subtle collectiveness of his tone. And he was demanding that Nessie must go outside, where he knew Faethra lurked patiently in the black shadows; he was ordering Renesmee to risk her life for her mother. It seemed weird; hurtful. Nessie felt as though Edward had chosen Bella over her, like she didn't mean a thing to him if his precious wife's life was being questioned.

Nessie shook the thought from her mind, knowing that she being absurd. Yes, Edward was right to assume that his daughter would come to Bella's rescue, that she would glady run through mountains of fire to save a life. She would put everything on the line as her mother once did for her; she wanted to do the right thing.

Adrenaline coursed like a trail of embers through her veins. Her knees picked up faster; her feet thudded louder; pushing herself forward. She strived to keep herself moving, letting the wind carry her legs passed the spruce, oak, and pine trees and lept over many trunks. Nessie felt like a fighter jet, flying straight in the space of battle.

If Faethra had done anything to harm Bella, Renesmee was going after her blood. Chagrin energized her body; Nessie ran and ran, just a few strides ahead of Jacob. Leaves crunched and twigs snapped underneathe her thunderous footsteps, urging herself to move swiftly.

From behind her, the russet wolf howled out, probably cautioning any other wolves that were already shifted. Every so often Jacob would growl or huff—and she had to wonder what he was telling the pack.

Had they seen Faethra? Were any of them missing? Were they hurt? What about Leah? Edward would have mentioned if any of her friends were in peril, too, right? Yes, of course he would have.

Renesmee slowed down to a complete halt, at last arriving at one of her childhood sanctuaries. Her shoulders slumped as she panted heavily, catching her breath. She coughed, feeling as though her stomach would evaporate from her body.

Wincing, her settings blurred in and out of sight; graying, yellowing, reddening, blackening, and then whitening before the world went clear again. Her heart pulsatedm thumping around like bigfoot.

She felt a cold, wet substancerub against the palm of her hand. Jacob whimpered, pleading for her attention. Nessie obligingly fell upon her knees, encircling her arms around his thick neck. Her fingers became lost in the jungle of his auburn pelt, seeking out its fluffy texture as it tickled her skin. The animal rested his chin on shoulder as if to return her hug. It was hard not to smile at that. It was nice—him being there for her.

Pulling away, Nessie scratched behind his ear. "Is everything all right?"

He nodded.

"Leah, too?"

Another nod.

"Okay, good," she replied, standing up to survey the area.

Every inch of this forest looked exactly the same, yet it didn't feel the same. A shiver of dread shot up her spine, her neck twitching. A small part of her wanted to utilize Jacob as a shield, to simply conceal her existence from the watchful eyes of the forest. A larger fraction of her brain wanted to tell Jacob to retreat, that she should be the one to protecting him. But she did neither, just staying there.

Renesmee twisted her head to the right, and then to the left. "I don't understand. My father should have been here by now," the half-breed admitted to the wolf. She planted her hands on her hips, exhaling flatly. "He told me to meet him right here at this spot—the Cave of Fear."

Jacob whined in question, dipping his head down to sniff at the ground.

"Oh," Renesmee muttered. "Him and I used to hunt for deer up here after we moved from Forks. We got into a huge argument one day, and I ran out of the house." It was the same day she learned her birth was an accident. "I found this cave and I cried for a little while. I came back a couple of different times, until there was a cave in one day. I was trapped for hours," she elaborated. "But then, Rosalie punched right through every single rock. After that, I never went back inside. I named it the 'Cave of Fear.' Pretty silly, huh?"

Glancing up from the forest floor," Jacob shrugged nonchalantly.

Nessie chewed on the inside of her bottom lip; no sign of Edward meant that there no sign of Bella, and Faethra had already proven herself untrackable. "Where could he be?" An idea popped in the forefront of her mind. Although, his scent was nowhere near the cavern, she thought there may have been a clue left inside. It was worth a look. "Jacob, I need you to stay out here. I'm gonna take a look inside."

He let out of a grunt of disapproval.

"Please, Jacob? You're stronger than I am. If I get trapped somehow, you're the only one that can save me."

He made a sound like he was thinking it over and gave her a reluctant nod.

"I'll be right back."

Nessie walked deep inside the spacious grotto, smelling eerily floral and sweet, to investigate. Her milk chocolate eyes scanned the atramentous walls as a few beetles escaped outside, fleeing from their home's alien. There was nothing particularly strange about this place until—as she had hoped—she had found something peculiar.

Not a something, but a someone.

"Mom?" she murmured in inquiry.

"Renesmee, my sweet little nudger!" the female vampire exclaimed happily, as if they hadn't seen each other in years. "What are you doing here?"

"Dad told me to meet him here," the halfling girl retorted, her brain calming down in relief. "Aren't you supposed to be in some kind of danger?"

"As you can see, I'm perfectly fine. Intact," Bella laughed chipperly, sitting down on a boulder. "Edward is being silly."

"That's Dad for you," Nessie agreed, shrugging nonchalantly.

Suddenly, the cave transformed; its shaped distorting and than converging. Four, wide, mint-green walls surrounded mother and daughter as the sky wept outside the window, the drops shattering hard against the thick glass. There was a small bookcase on the left corner of the room, with dozens of different text books, encyclopedias, and fairytales on the shelves. A bed, wth lavender pillowcases and light pink covers, was in the center of the room—her childhood room—where Bella now sat.

Perhaps she should have, but Nessie didn't question it. She loved this room, and it was great to be home. It seemed normal to be in this place.

"Yeah, you know him. He's always been overprotective of me," Bella said, patting the bed for Renesmee to sit down next to her, who complied. "He always thinks I'm in danger."

"I know," Nessie smiled disinterestedly, glancing around the room. It was exactly the way she remembered. "You can take care of yourself."

"Yes, I can," the woman strigoi stated, a smirk pinching at the righthand coner of her apple-red mouth. A twinge of jealousy stung at Nessie's stomach; her mother was gorgeous—unbelievably so. "That doesn't stop him, has always kept me safe—from James, from Victior, from the Volturi, from my best friend and all the other wolves, from himself, and even from my own daughter. Our daughter," she tilted her head to the side as though it was harmless quip.

Nessie turned away, looking at the wooden floorboards. "Mom. . ."

"I loved you, Renesmee, from the moment I felt you nudge inside my weak womb. Nesting there—like a little monster," Bella giggled, the sound sweet and malicious.

Ouch.

That hit a nerve. Not hit, but punched.

Eyes, that normally adorned a subtle honey-brown hue, were a shade of pure gold. They almost appeared to glow as Bella's smirk widened, mischevous and nefarious. It reminded Nessie of a flaxen doe, who delighted in making jests of uncomfortable subjects—of Faethra, who wasn't a predictable creature.

The things she said were oddly inconsiderate, and Bella had always tried to spare her daughter's hurt feelings. Now, it was like she didn't even care. Her words stabbed at Renesmee's mind like a burning-hot dagger. She didn't understand. Why was her momma behaving so cruelly? Had Nessie done something wrong? Did she really think of Nessie as a monster?

No, she told herself. Bella was making a poor joke, but she didn't mean it. She couldn't have.

"I don't understand," Renesmee murmured, swallowing back a knurl of regret. She wanted to go back outside to Jacob, to escape from this discussion with Bella.

"Edward knew it from the start," Bella said, stroking Renesmee's cheek in motherly affection. "You were a teeny-tiny demon, little nudger. You were always breaking my body. Every single moment I was pregnant with you, I was in agonizing pain."

She rested a hand against her flat stomach in a strained hurt, grimacing slightly in remembrance of a baby girl that had long since existed her formerly mortal body. Her fingers danced in rhythmic circles to try and soothe what wasn't there.

Nessie momentarily recollected to when she first laid eyes on her mother. Bella was nothing but a mess of a sickly human—the color of her brunette locks perishing and dulling, her cranium practically swelling out her cheeks, her skin was ghostly white, and her then milk chocolate orbs were fastly losing their life.

"I'm sorry, Momma," Nessie apologized, her body cringing under Bella cold touch. She scooted and inch away. "I never meant to hurt you. I never wanted to."

"Oh, baby. My sweet baby," Bella cooed sweetly, her bottom lip jutting out in a faux pout. She was actually mocking Nessie's plight. "I know. I know you don't intend to make others suffer with your existence. It just comes naturally to you." She made it sound like a talent.

"What?" the half-human half-vampire choked out softly, devastation draped all over her expression. "Momma, that's not funny."

"It's not supposed to be funny, Renesmee, because there's nothing funny about causing destructing for everyone around you," Bella said, her golden irises wearing a wicked light. "You're an abomination, sweetheart."

"No!" Renesmee exclaimed, shooting up from the bed. She glowered down at her mother, the knots in her stomach tossing about like a tsunami. "Anytime I had any doubts about myself, you had always said that I wasn't."

The vampire cast her gaze down to the ground, then back up at Nessie—reluctant and remorseful. "I've always lied to protect you, but now it's time you know the truth."

"Fine. So, tell me," Nessie whispered, crossing her arms over her chest.

"Everyone could always see that you were a mistake, but I was stubborn. I wanted you so bad. Edward, Jasper, Alice, and Carlisle knew the truth," Bella elucidated, standing up as Nessie turned away. "Esme and Rosalie. . . were blinded by their own catastrophies. They couldn't think clearly. In their eyes, you were just a baby."

"But they were right," Nessie replied, playing with the locket on its golden chain around her neck. Now, it felt tighter, as if she were being strangled. "They had to be. Rosie and Grandma Esme were right about me."

"No, I'm sorry," Bella apologized, forcing Nessie to look at her. "They were wrong. I was wrong. Edward was right. He was always right—an annoying tendency, trust me," she confessed with a weightless jeer. "Do you know else wanted you gone? Do you know who else was right?"

Nessie felt nauseous—gutted, stammering out, "J-Jacob."

Her heart filled to the brim with a sharp pain that she had never felt before, a pain that was impossible to soothe. It should have been declared criminal. This sorrow consumed her body and tinged her skin, devouringly feasting upon the light of her soul, and claimed her.

She wanted to run away, but she couldn't—her feet were bolted to the floor as her mother finally had the nerve to speak the truth to her. Renesmee wanted to keep denying it to herself; but when Jacob was mentioned in the mix, everything became too real.

Jacob Black fought harder than anybody else to to get Renesmee terminated before even being born. "Throw it the window!" he bellowed—that unmistakable authorative, gruff tone—to her father in the midst of all that grief. . . Nessie winced. What? No. He never said anything of the sort. He wasn't even present for her birth eight years ago. Somebody else must have said that.

It didn't matter.

She was still aware of what he felt about her, but Nessie didn't want to. Jacob had been foolish. Nobody, not one of them, would have been willing to get to know her—to give her a chance. They still don't know her. She wasn't anything they said. She was not an abomination; she was not a monster; she was not a mistake.

"Yes," Bella confirmed. "Jacob," she giggled, lowering her voice to whisper in Renesmee's ear, "My Jacob. My best friend that was so desperately in love with me. He'll always be in love with me. Mine. Nothing you do will change that." She pointed to herself, a devilish smirk painting her lips.

Had she always been so smug?

"That's not true," Nessie said, stepping back from Bella before her voice could resound in her head, her whispering haunting the young girl.

"Of course it's true, Renesmee," Bella retorted, quirking an eyebrow. "I ruined him for all woman. What makes you think that he could possibly fall for the likes of you? Think about it—it's been eight years. Jacob—poor Jacob—should be married by now, with children and a home of his own. Why does he refuse to move on?"

"Because Jacob is meant to be with me," the half-breed answered solemnly, stopping her voice from cracking like glass. "He's in love with me."

Bella threw back her head, her shoulders trembling as she cackled like a wicked witch over a brew pot. "Oh, yeah? Then why hasn't he said as much? He won't say what he doesn't feel. Stop tricking yourself. It's making you look pathetic. That's just what he wants. Are you going to let Jacob manipulate you like a puppet?"

"No!" Renesmee snarled, shaking her head to and fro, and accidentally startled her mother. "You're wrong! He's not like that! Jacob is just afraid, but he will say it. I know he will. I can see it in his eyes."

"Wishful thinking, Renesmee," Bella remarked, swiping an auburn tendril off her daughter's shoulder and then rested her hand on it in a comforting manner, but the proximity did the very opposite of comfort Renesmee; she was anxious to get away.

Why couldn't she get away? Why was she still here? Her room. . . Renesmee was trapped in her room. She forgot about forest outside; she forgot about Jacob waiting for her; she forgot about the question that led her to this place; she forgot about the fact that she was inside a cave; she forgot that Faethra existed; and most importantly, she forgot about her self-esteem—that everyone loved her.

"You're nothing but his way of getting back at me."

"I don't believe you."

It didn't make any sense whatsoever for Jacob not be in love with her. . . Or maybe it killed her that it did, indeed, make sense. What did he need her for? Because he loved her? No, that was impossible, a voice kept saying, he didn't love her. Every sweet word that passed his lips was to spite Bella; every tender touch was a game for Jacob to play Nessie like a wild card, a game that would eventually caught her heart unbearable agony; every passionate kiss was a manipulation used to hurt Nessie, as revenge for what Bella did to him.

Every moment was a lie. A damn lie!

"Sweetie, come on. You're half vampire. It's in his DNA to hate you," the brown-haired strigoi shrugged casually, patting Nessie's shoulder gently as if heartbreak was the equivalent of a papercut. She was attempting to be motherly, but she was doing a bad job of it. "Those are odds you can't beat. If you two were ever meant to be, Jacob would have remained after you were born—for you. He would have imprinted—on you. But he didn't. Instead, you were the one that drove him away in the first place."

"Stop! Stop, please!" Nessie begged.

She felt moisture begin to glisten her eyes; a tear slowly streamed down her cheek, burning along the trail it left. Yes, she knew the reason why Jacob left. Of course she knew. This was a fact that would never be erased from her mind, and knowing it made her want to die.

If Jacob wanted to, Renesmee would allow his sharp claws to sink into her porcelain skin and tear her body limb from limb. She would let him dig his fangs deep into her chest and rip out her bleeding heart; her heart only belonged to Jacob no matter what happened. Let him be the one to taste the true feeling of her love for him.

Even if Jacob couldn't care less for her, it didn't magically change Nessie's love for him.

"You know the truth, don't you? Jacob did. He agreed with your father," Bella recollected out loud, a strangely nostalgic, mean glimmer showing in the golden shade of her eyes.

It was as if being a mother had been some role in a play and now the curtains were closing. Had Bella ever loved her? What was Bella supposed to be protecting her from?

"Edward and Jacob wanted you dead. They knew you were something evil, but I wouldn't let them harm you," she continued, sounding more sardonic than genuine. "I loved you too much. And then, you were born. My beautiful baby girl, with your father's face and my brown eyes. . . For a second, I actually believed that I had done the right thing. But when I held you—just a tiny, little thing in my arms—I figured out what you really are. An accident," she stated nonchalantly. "A monster."

"I didn't ask to be born," Renesmee said evenly, more tears pooling around the milk chocolate color of her irises. There was no need for her to be this cruel, so why was Bella doing this to her? Nothing about Nessie had changed. She's always been a monster. All her life; her birth was an accident. "You should have listened to everyone else."

"I know that now, but unfortunately I don't have a time machine. I can't go back. I wish I could," Bella replied sincerely, embracing Renesmee closely. "Baby girl, you killed me—made me into a bloodsucking vampire, but between the two of us, you have stolen more lives."

"No!" she cried, yanking away from her mother's tight grasp. Finally, her feet needed to move. Nessie turned to run away, but suddenly bumped into a mass of cold marble. Icy fingers caged her wrists while she struggled to break free. "Let me go!"

"Remember Irina?" a new voice inquired bitterly. A masculine voice. A familiar voice.

Looking up, the human-vampire creature saw the somber expression of a bronze-haired man, ever-stern in his nature. He gazed upon the girl in his hands as though she was a rock in his shoe, scum, and nothing more than a repulsive abberation. That look made her stomach tighten; she could feel herself shrink under the cold heat of his golden heat.

Again, Renesmee tried to free her wrists from her granite handcuffs, but the man refused to release her, and neglected the pitiful noises of her countless pleas. He couldn't have cared less about her pain. She pounded her fists as hard as she could against his chest, but her efforts were rendered worthless.

"Let me go!" Nessie screamed like a banshee. "Dad! Daddy, please let me go!"

"Ridiculous child," Edward sneered, shoving her into Bella. "Tell us what you know."

"Irina would still be alive if I had never been around," Nessie sobbed, uncomfortable as she stood in the center of Edward and Bella. A mother, a father, and their unholy terror of a daughter. "The Volturi wouldn't have killed her if it weren't for me."

"I couldn't agree with you more," Edward chuckled. The sound made her skin crawl.

"You should have gotten rid of me when you had the chance," the young Cullen retorted, wiping the tears away from her reddened cheeks.

"Yes, you're very right. My love for you was my downfall," Bella confessed in feigned sorrow.

"You've always known exactly what you are. Haven't you, Renesmee? Deep down, though the family have told you generous lies of the contrary, you've felt the monster inside you thirst for release."

Renesmee stood still, giving Edward one nod. "Yes."

"You can feel it grow now, can you?"

"Yes."

"Does the monster ache?"

"Yes."

"What does a monster like you feel?"

"Nothing."

"Oh, I don't believe that's true. Try again."

"I feel nothing."

Edwar's hand rose high in the air, balling into a sterdy fist, and punched his daughter roughly in the stomach. She emitted an echoing groan of pure pain, clutching her abdomen. Bella just stood there, watching with a gleeful grin.

"Wrong! What you feel is cruelty! What you feel is hate!" he spat. "Everyone who falls victim to your presence is doomed to sacrifice something precious!"

The pair of vampires began circling around Renesmee menacingly, glowering at her with bright golden orbs. They reminded her of great white sharks trying to intimidate their prey into surrendering early, swimming two narrow rings round and round her until she was sure to submit. Edward growled like a ferocious, hungry lion, grinning a cake-eating grin—evil. Bella appeared slightly more lamb like, feeble yet just as fierce. She widened her eyes in sadness.

Nessie felt sickeningly dizzy, and shut her eyes tightly. Breathe, she mused inwardly. She inhaled sharply, and then exhaled deeply, counting to ten. Jasper, though was also a desirer of her fatality, once told her that counting could be used as a strategy to ease the heat of the moment. But when she opened her eyes again, Bella and Edward were still there, telling her that she was too evil for this world.

"I lost my humanity," Bella said. "My life."

"Jacob lost his home and his self," Edward added.

"Leah lost any chance she had at real love."

"I lost my Bella."

"Irina lost her life."

"The Denalis lost their dear sister."

"Mhmm, sisterhood," the brunette woman laughed wickedly.

"Sisterhood, Renesmee. I bet that is a topic of family you wouldn't even begin to comprehend. You don't understand how strong those bonds are," Edward commented, his fiery and chaotic gaze setting her skin tortorously ablaze.

"I didn't mean-"

"Hypolita was complete stranger," Bella interupted in a bothersome tone, silencing Nessie with the wave of a hand, "trying to save this horrible world of you. It would have been a great service, but that stupid dog got in the way. He murdered Hypolita to protect a thing like you! Why? He doesn't even like you!"

"You," Edward snarled, roughly grabbing Nessie by the shoulders and shook her, "who isn't worthy to walk among insects."

"And now we're all forced to pay a high price because of me. Because I chose to have you," Bella said, looking absolutely guilty.

"We're all scared—hiding from the golden hind," Edward chortled, playing with an autumn ringlet from Nessie's hair.

"How many of us will be forced to die for you, Renesmee?" Bella queried, whispering harshly in her ear.

"Do you honestly wish to see your beautiful, brave mother be slaughtered?" Edward questioned, vehemently pushing Renesmee away from him.

"No, of course not!" Nessie exclaimed, backing herself into a corner and glanced betwixt between both parents. "I want all of you to be safe! I didn't mean for any of this to happen. Please, forgive me. . ."

The windows faded away slowly, any traces of light nonexistant. Everything in the room was disappearing—the window, the bed, the bookshelf, along with all evidence that she had ever experienced a childhood. She couldn't recall frollicking in the woods, forcing Emmett and Jasper to dress up as princesses, helping Esme out in the garden by flowering her petunias, or building sandcastles with Leah on First Beach. It was as if she didn't have a past. Abominations don't have lives.

"There's still hope of redemption for you," Bella started gently, taking a hesitant step closer. "If it's one thing you've always been good at, it's holding out for hope. You can help set things right, Renesmee—for once." She looked Nessie dead in the eyes. "Would like to do that?"

"Yes, Momma," the hybrid sniffled. "How can I help?"

"You can mend my mistake."

"Nobody else will have to die in your place. The golden hind will leave us alone," Edward answered, this time lovingly taking Nessie by the hand. "Do you know the solution?"

Renesmee shuddered coldly, her knees trembling as her back hit against the wall. Why? Why were they saying these things? She sank down in the corner, unable to look at either of her parents in their beautiful, angelic eyes. She couldn't stand it. If they didn't want her, why did they bother to keep her around? A violent tremor racked through her body, as her stomach thrashed. Her eyes flooded, all but blinding her vision.

The walls were closing in around while Edward and Bella knelt down in front of her. There was no space for escape. Renesmee was stuck between her parents and these animated walls, still getting tighter and tighter. Never in her like did she consider herself claustrophobic, but Nessie increasingly feared Bella, Edward, and the walls that refused to relent their motion. They, too, yearned to crush her, their shrill voices accusing her of atrocity.

When she finally found her voice again, Nessie replied matter-of-factually, "I have to die. So, do it then. It's what you've always wanted, Dad—to kill me. Here is your big chance. Go ahead. Get it over with."

"Renesmee, my daughter," Edward grimaced apologetically, running a finger along her knee. "Baby girl, look at me," he commanded gently, to which Renesmee obeyed, her mahogany irises stained pink with salted sorrow. "Is it possible that over the years I have grown to love you as well? Yes. Of course. You're mine, too. I refuse to dirty my hands with your blood."

"We love you, Renesmee," Bella added, at least sounding earnest, "but neither of us are able to protect you for much longer. We can't kill you either."

"What else can be done? What else can I do?" Nessie asked in desperation.

"Oh, my sweet little nudger," Bella sighed. "Renesmee, what are you? What power over us do you hold?"

"Tell us what you are, sweetheart. Go on. Say it," Edward pressed, arching a thick eyebrow.

"Monster. . ." Renesmee uttered, barely audible.

"Louder, please?" he requested, satisfaction covering his pale expression as he and Bella exchanged smiles.

"I'm a monster!" she yelled, snarling like a viscous beast. "Okay? A filthy, grotesque, damned monster! Is that what you want to hear? Everything is my fault! I ruin it all just by breathing! Everyone I know is destined to die as long as I exist! I'm a magnet for disaster. . . I'm evil. I'm sory. I'm sorry for being born every damn day."

"Then you already know what must be done," Bella said, frowning slightly as if the words were becoming tedious.

"You must die. Right your mother's wrongs," Edward swallowed, exhaling flatly. "Relieve her guilty conscience."

"I'm sorry," the young girl apologized. "I'm so sorry."

Bella stretched her arm into the pocket of Edward's coat, revealing a gun. "Take this gun in your hands, Renesmee."

"A simple bullet won't do the job," Nessie stated, staring in astonishment at the weapon.

"Oh, we know. Your father and I managed to acquire some hind's blood. The bullet is coated in it," Bella retorted, extending her arm out.

"I don't wanna die, Momma," the half-human half-vampire whimpered, reaching out for the pistol. Her hand wrapped around the handle and merely gazed in disbelief at it, "but I don't wanna be selfish either."

Her fingers trailed along the length of the handgun, silver and shiny, a beautiful departure from the universe. Gorgeous—a small price to pay for insignificant life. A single tear droplet fell upon the silvery surface, fogging up the reflection of red-scaled, horrible, hideous demonic thing. Renesmee caressed the gun as is were a precious artifact, as if it was a halo-headed angel.

"Faethra will hunt us all down—everyone you hold dear, including Jacob—if you don't do this," Edward laughed in delight, using the magic word. Jacob.

"You can save him," Bella taunted, molding Renesmee's digits properly on the trigger. "Take this chance as you take your life. Jacob does not love you, but your goodness, the same goodness I thought you had. End his woes."

"Do it," Edward encouraged.

"Put the gun to your heart, Renesmee," Bella instructed carefully, and then continued to add salt to the open wound, "or do even have a heart?"

"Save us, Renesmee," Edward murmured hopefully. "You're the only one that has the power to do so. You will always be the villain of the story, but this is your opportunity to have your beloved parents remember you a beacon of love."

"Touch the trigger."

"A hero."

"Pull back on the trigger."

"It's not easy for us either, Renesmee."

"I love you, Daddy," the girl sobbed, saying her goodbyes.

"I loved you, too, monster," Edward responded, grinning widely.

"I'm sorry for everything I have done," Nessie gulped a swelling lump.

"It's time to let go, Renesmee. Let go of the trigger," Bella bidded, smirking nefariously.

"Momma," Nessie coughed, slowly allowing her index finger to tug back on the icy trigger.

"I will miss you," Bella giggled, "so very much."

"Let go. Die a hero's death," Edward snickered. "And don't worry. Jacob will hear of your final moments."

Nessie pulled back tighter—further—on the trigger, resting the cold nozzle over her chest. She arched her breast into the inevitable blow, ready—ready to die. She wanted life, but as she took one last glimpse at Edward and Bella, she knew that she did not need it; she didn't belong in anyone's life. As she convinced herself that this was the right thing to do—as finally let go—a russet hand tore the pistol from her grasp.

"Hey, didn't your mother teach you never to play with guns?"

"No!" she shouted screechingly as Jacob fired the shot up toward the roof of the cafe. Nessie beat against his bare chest, though he resisted her insistant pleas. He only held her tenaciously as her mother and father merged into a sheer golden shape, a beautifully dangerous doe. In a flash, she was gone, replaced again with Edward and Bella. "No, let me go! I just wanna die! Let me die! Let me go!" What was real?"

"Nessie. . ." Jacob muttered, throwing the gun away, and rocked the hysterical girl-woman back and forth. "I'm here now. I'm never ever letting you go. Do you hear me? Never."

"Renesmee," her mother, the same one that just told her to shoot herself, stared at her with saddened topaz orbs. She tried to reach out to her daughter, but Nessie resisted, unable to trust her eyes. "Honey, it's me. I'm not going to hurt you."

Edward knelt down, his expression drenched in corcern. "Faethra is gone now. It's us."

"Go away!" she cried, retreating further into Jacob's embrace and buried her face into his chest. "Just let me die," Nessie sobbed loudly. "I beg you. . ."

_Monster_

_How should I feel?_

_Creatures lie here_

_Looking through the window_

_I will hear their voices_

_I'm a glass child_

_I am Hannah's regret_


	40. Dark Side

**Disclaimer: Nothing belongs to me. Song belongs to Kelly Clarkson.**

_There's a place that I know_

_It's not pretty there if you have ever gone_

_If I show it to you now_

_Will it make you run away?_

_Or will you stay?_

_Even if it hurts_

_Even if I try to push you out_

_Will you return_

_And remind me who I really am?_

_Please remind who I really am_

Jacob held on to his Nessie, swearing that there was not a force in this world mighty enough to tear him away from her; there was nothing Faethra could do. In his arms was where Nessie belonged, and he refused to ever let her go. Not even when she slammed her fists down on his chest, not even when she pleaded for death, not even when she screamed out of the call of a broken heart did Jacob's grasp ever let up.

It was almost unbelievable, how Nessie vehemently sobbed into his chest, denying her gaze to Edward and Bella. She didn't seem to know their faces, who they were, as if they were minions of darkness or something. They continued to reassure their daughter of their identity and that Faethra was no longer near. Anything that she had said was a lie. But all this talk had done very little to ease Renesmee's damage.

Eventually, Nessie had passed out from all the trauma consuming her body, and Jacob, Edward, and Bella ventured back to Charlie's house. Jacob carried Nessie—well, more like cradled—though Edward and Bella made many offers to do so, while Edward explained that he and his wife were on a hunt nearby when he caught whispers into Nessie's mind.

All of Faethra's special brand of torment—the images, the words, the setting—had taken place in the half-breed's mind, making her suffer alone, and that was why Jacob hadn't heard anything. Still, Edward hadn't been sure, not until Jacob's own booming thoughts were coated in suspicion.

He also elucidated what Faethra had done. She had used Nessie's self-doubt as tools for torture—Nessie was an abomination that only brought pain upon those she loved, everyone could see she was a monster, Jacob didn't truly care anything for her. Handfuls of lies Renesmee feared enough to be tricked into taking her own life. Faethra imprisoned Nessie in her own mind.

Anyone could sort of relate.

Everyone had fears and doubts about themselves.

Jacob did.

A lot.

He feared that he wasn't good enough—to be Alpha, to be in Renesmee's life, to conquer his dark side. But what Faethra had done was despicable. She actually brought Nessie's turmoil in herself to life, animating all those secret weak spots that Faethra had no right to know and she used them—Edward, Bella, and even Jacob—against Nessie.

She made Nessie believe that her existence was an accident of nature, just like he always used to say. The golden hind backed Nessie into a corner, nearly causing her to go insane. Jacob knew what it was like to be enslaved by a monster created by personal, inner terrors, to feel stuck in a lightless cave with voices, but it had never literally happened.

And Faethra nearly won.

How had she done it? How did Faethra manage to violate Renesmee's mind? How did she know what made Nessie actually willing to commit suicide?

Suicide.

Wow.

That's what Nessie wanted to do to herself.

She wanted to end her life.

That's what she was begging for.

Jacob's heart went out to her as Edward repeated the gist of what had been traded between Faethra's illusion into Nessie. Her body was racked with tremors, trembling constantly in Jacob's arms as if she was lost outside in a snowstorm. Every once in awhile, her hand would splay over the pounding of his heart, and Jacob would momentarily think she had awoken, but she hadn't. Nessie was subconsciously holding on to him for warmth and comfort, and then for a second, she would stop shaking.

That made Jacob feel. . . valuable, or at least to her.

Maybe—maybe even in her sleep she knew that he was her Jacob.

When they finally got back to Charlie's place, Edward and Bella inspected Renesmee for any physical violence. If anything from Faethra's fantasy was real enough to Nessie, like that gun for instance, anything could have hurt her—a shot, a punch, a pinch, a stab, a slap. At the sound of Edward's mumbled curses and Bella's snake-like hissing, Jacob realized Faethra must have wrongly managed to harm her. Now, that knawed at Jacob's last nerve; it was horrible enough that Faethra had tried to convince Nessie into offing herself, but she really felt the need to leave even more pain in her wake?

What a bitch.

Anyway. . .

Then, Bella and Edward dressed Renesmee in a light blue nightgown, and tucked her into Bella's old bed, despite Jacob's insistantly stating that Nessie preferred the guest bedroom. Edward had only scowled at him and Jacob struggled not to picture all the naugthy—for the lack of a better word—things that occurred in there. He expected Edward to bash his skull into the wall, but when his brain remained, he knew Bella had mercifully employed her shield over him. Phew. Too many minds would have been penetrated today.

As Renesmee slept soundly upstairs, the trio discussed everything downstairs in the living room. Or at least Bella and Edward were having a conversation. For the most part, Jacob wasn't paying that much attention to anything either of them said, only making a comment when it was expected of him. His focus was superglued to the half-human half-vampire girl upstairs.

He was counting her gentle breaths—one, two, twenty-three, fifty-six, one hundred. . . Was she dreaming? If she was, what was she dreaming about? What would she be like when she eventually woke up? Normal? Depressed? Okay? Hysterical?

Poor, sweet Nessie. His Nessie. Why did the golden hind have to be so cruel? Couldn't she stop and give Nessie the opportunity to explain? Could she listen to him? Nessie wasn't the one who had killed her sister. And then, Jacob wondered why Faethra hadn't attempted to lead him into the Cave of Fear. It wasn't Nessie's fault. Surely, Faethra must have known that.

Jacob huffed out a breath, leaning far back in Chief Swan's barcalounger as he, Edward, and Bella waited for his girlfriend to awake. They spoke in half-calm whispers, fidgeting restlessly.

Two hundred seventy-one, two hundred seventy-two, two hundred seventy-three. . .

Stupid unreasonable, cruel, ugly yellow butt.

"I cannot believe this! That. . . that bitch!" Bella exclaimed, stomping her foot down on the carpet, causing the ground to tremble lightly.

Her husband strode over to her side, grasping her shoulders from behind. He placed a quick kiss on her cheek. "Calm down, love. We don't want to wake Renesmee up prematurely."

Bella huffed, but conceded. "How could Faethra do that to Ness-" she stopped short when Jacob regarded with a curious expression, "Renesmee. . . ? How could Faethra do this to Renesmee?"

"Too easily," Edward remarked, tenderly releasing his mate. He started pacing back and forth across the living room.

"This is my fault," Jacob stated, beyond the shadow of a doubt.

All he had to do was deny Nessie passage into of the Cave of Fear; all he had to do was follow her inside; all he had to do was go in sooner rather than later. That wouldn't have been too difficult. The hardest challenge would have been overcoming Nessie's intial stubborn attitude, but. . .

What the hell was wrong with him? Why was he always so damn stupid? He had to stop being stupid. He couldn't be stupid with Nessie.

"Trust me, Jacob, as much I would prefer pointing a particular finger at you right about now, Faethra is the one that deserves to be put through hell. Not you," Bella said, sagging down over the couch.

Her expression. . . For a minute, she looked like Jacob's old best friend, the one he spent hundreds of easygoing hours in the garage while he worked on that beat up, worthless motorcycle. Bella didn't look as cold or as harsh as she normally did. Today, she looked like a new version of herself. A concerned parent, a wife, a vampire.

But it was, however, remarkable. Jacob didn't see, or was merely unable to recognize, the girl he was once over-the-moon in love with years ago. He couldn't see the girl that made his heart quicken like a racing stallion running for thousands of miles; he couldn't see the girl that made his palms sweat madly; he couldn't see the girl that he would have happily offered up a lifetime of servitude for; and he definitely couldn't see the girl that he needed more than oxygen.

Maybe it was because that girl was still sleeping upstairs.

"When you picked up the golden hind's scent, you did the right thing by immediately going in after Nessie," Edward nodded along, rubbing his temples.

"I wanted to go in sooner, but something was holding me back," Jacob replied, nsure of what he was attempting to justify to them as well as himself.

"Poor Renesmee,"Bella sighed, adorning a solemn expression as she pursed her lips. "I. . ." she glanced toward the staircase when Nessie audibly shifted around in her sleep. "I never thought I would ever see my daughter holding a pistol to her heart."

Yeah. There was an image that was gonna stay with him forever—a scared girl about to take her precious, priceless life.

Edward shrugged—not in any sort of relaxed way, but was instead befuddled, as thought the mind-reader couldn't wrap his head around what happened. "Faethra was cruel to her. The things she said was disgusting. Monster, abberation, abomination, demon. . ."

But they had said those things, too—all that and probably thought so much more. What had they been thinking? Maybe he and Edward were two idiots that couldn't see beyond the edge of their noses way back when.

"There was a bruise on Renesmee's stomach," Bella murmured absentmindedly, knitting her eyebrows sternly together.

The man-wolf felt his black pupils widen in both fury and shock. What? Had that ignorant yellow butt dared to lay a hand on his Nessie?

He thought about Nessie's pain, though he didn't want to. Jacob remembered finding her in a crumbled up dissarray on the den's floor, warm tears trickling down her flushed cheeks as she held a handgun to her chest. She actually fought him for it; although, halfheartedly. Now, Faethra had been stupid enough to leave a mark on the flawless skin of the beautiful porcelain creature.

"The golden hind punched her," Edward whispered, staring at his marble hands in disgust, "but Nessie saw me do it—my hands."

Bella clenched her fists, seething, "I'll kill her!"

"Nessie shouldn't have been forced to go through that,"Jacob said, shaking his head to and fro. He covered his face in his hands, exhaling deeply. "I shouldn't have let her go inside. This entire thing could have been prevented if I wasn't suck a blockhead all the time."

But no. No more. Starting this very second, he was putting his foot down. It didn't matter who was in danger, Nessiewas staying home.

"It was a trap, Jacob," Edward reasoned, pausing his nervous pacing. He grimaced slightly, sitting on the couch adjacent to Bella. "You couldn't have known. She used Bella's nonexistent danger as a plot to lure you and Nessie to the Cave of Fear."

"Maybe the title should have tipped me off," Jacob grumbled, digging his fingers into either arm of the chair.

"But how did Faethra know about the Cave of Fear in the first place?" Edward inquired, tapping is index finger against his chin. "How did she know about what Nessie is most afraid of? How did she know about all the things we said? How did she know about Bella's difficult pregnancy?"

"Can Faethra read minds?" Jacob questioned, arching a black eyebrow and tilting his head to the side, and rubbed his forehead in exhaustion.

"We know that she can somehow read Renesmee's," Edward retorted as if that was supposed to comfort anyone.

"But why? How?"

"There has to be a logical explanation—a special connection between them."

"Connection? Like a similarity? DNA?"

"Not exactly. . ." Edward answered, but didn't look positive himself. "I don't know exactly, Jacob. It was just a theory."

"A blood-to-blood link," Bella mumbled under her breath, her honey-brown irises darting all over the place for proper answers.

Although, Jacob had a funny feeling that his old best friend was witholding important information—answers they were looking for.

"What?" Edward and Jacob asked in unison, and then briefly exchanged bewildered glances.

"Oh. . . Sorry," Bella shrugged sheepishly, crossing her arms over her chest. "I was thinking aloud. It's impossible, anyways. Nessie would be. . ." she paused, her jaw tightening, ". . . dead if Faethra's blood was coursing through her veins. No doubt about it. Trust me."

A request gone untouched, at least by Jacob. He couldn't trust her. What was she hiding?

Jacob sighed, seemingly concurring. "Nessie wouldn't survive." Which was definitely not an option. Faethra would have to go through him first.

"No. So there must be another reason," Bella replied in a hushed tone.

Edward nestled his forehead into his hand, sliding it down his face in frustration. "Wait a minute. If Faethra can penetrate Renesmee's mind once, it is very possible she might do it again."

"Renesmee isn't even safe from herself," Bella commented evenly, and rolled her eyes.

"Perhaps," Edward shrugged, glancing carefully at the Native American man with a light smirk stretching at the lefthand corner of his mouth, "but Jacob has proven himself thrice."

"Yeah, but I'm also the one that's always getting Nessie into trouble to begin with," the shape-shifter replied, furrowing a dark eyebrow. He didn't want to lose the priviledge of being his Nessie's knight in shining armor, but he hadn't done much for her—yet. Jacob would not allow himself to horse around with her life anymore.

"Jacob, stop it," the female vampire snarled, wrinkling her face in annoyance. "You're the reason why she's alive right now."

"Bella's right," Edward agreed, slanting his mouth and nodded. "Faethra was going to torture Nessie to death—and nearly did—until you stepped in. Nessie would not be with us if you hadn't put a stop to it."

"Edward and I owe you, Jacob," Bella said with a grimace, forcing a begruding smile.

"Does that mean I have your blessing to date your daughter?" Jacob grinned. A dimple pressing into his right cheek.

"Not even if hell freezes over," Bella scoffed, partly joking.

"Welp, it was worth a shot," Jacob laughed, albeit tensely. And then he thought. . . "No pun intended."

There was a small portion of his brain that wanted to start winding down, but there was no way that was going to happen until he knew that Nessie was all right. Thus, laughing—even a chuckle—felt criminal.

"So, what do you do now?"

"We do nothing until we know more," the male strigoi retorted, probably agonizing over the fact that there was a plethora of more questions while there wasn't even a morsel of answers. His topaz eyes concealed sadness, but chose to ignore it. "Renesmee is safe as long as she and Jacob don't split up." He looked directly at Jacob. "No matter what happens, Jacob, you have to stay with her."

Bella pursed her lips, "But. . ."

"What, love?"

"How can Jacob protect Renesmee is Faethra pulls a stunt like that again?"

"I'll never let Nessie out of my sight," Jacob promised sullenly.

As an immediate response, the brunette woman dubiously replied, "You're gonna have to go to the restroom eventually, Jacob."

"Bells, come on," Jacob pleaded in a gruff whisper. "What other option is there? I can't. . . I can't stand being without her."

She cleared her throat nervously, swallowing a thick lump of venom. "Jacob, this is really not the time for you to be selfish, but I guess that I understand. I may not like it, but Renesmee needs you just as much."

"Renesmee wouldn't even come near us," Edward said, getting up from the couch; and for the second time in Jacob's life, he saw the face of a man with the plan, who didn't have a clue about what he should do. Only this time, a daughter was tangled up in his concerns. "She looked at us as if we carried the seven plagues."

"I really hate Faethra," Bella hissed in frustration, stifling a fierce rush of strength, otherwise, Charlie's coffee table would have paid. "What the hell is her problem? It was her sister's stupid fault!"

"That's not the way she sees it, and we're not going to be able to change her mind," Edward replied, grimacing slightly. "Faethra is driven by anger and hatred. Bella, we can't be like her for our daughter's sake."

"Oh, don't you dare preach at me, Edward," Bella responded, rolling her eyes. She didn't appreciate her husband's words of pointless wisdom. "I know that, but she was going to make Renesmee shoot herself! Doesn't that upset you even a little bit? Jeeze! Faethra was so close, too. Who knows how much damage control needs to be done?"

"Yes, Bella, but Renesmee needs us—she needs us to keep our heads on straight," Edward said matter-of-factually, deliberately neglecting his wife's growing negativity.

"Whatever," she snapped momentarily, and then frowned apologetically. "Yes. . . You're right, Edward. I'm sorry. I guess I'm just having a hard time accepting that anyone would want to murder our baby girl."

"I think the trly disturbing part is that Faethra couldn't have grabbed those fears out from nowhere. Nessie actually believes that she should be held responsible for everything bad that has happened," Edward elucidated, going back to his instinct pacing—back and forth, to and from, right to left.

"That's so unreasonable," Bella scoffed, crinkling her nose in annoyance, as if she couldn't possibly fathom why Nessie felt such strong terror in herself. "She didn't play any hand in Irina's death, Jacob's departure, and I always wanted to be a vampire. I don't regret having her," she said, popping her knuckles. "And Renesmee should not feel guilty for the misconceptions and decisions of other people."

Did that make Jacob other people? After all, he played a role as much as Edward and Bella in hurting Nessie.

"Not every fear is rational, love," Edward retorted.

"Ugh, I thought she had moved passed this!" Bella snarled.

It was almost uncanny how Edward and Bella wore the same, exact expression—irises the rock hard color of flaming pitch-black anger, clenched jaws, and strained faces with their veins about to pop. Bella moved across the living room, shoving her hands into the pockets of her jeans. Edward paused drearily, tapping her foot against the ground while staring at the window. Jacob had to smile just a little bit, seeing them as parents was eerily endearing. They loved Nessie. But still. . .

What was it Bella wasn't telling them?

"I don't think the things we are honestly scared of will disappear," Edward sighed sharply, roughly pinching the bridge of his nose. "All Faethra did was try to make you and I confirm that her fears are an actuality."

Actuality? What could he do to assure Nessie that she was very loved as much as she could love. Jacob shifted around uncomfortably in his seart, observing Papa and Mama Cullen in all their worry. What a weird sight. The pair of them were blatantly distressed out of their minds. Now, Bella was the one pacing around like a madman.

"But it makes no sense!" Bella yelled, stamping her foot. "Before everything started, before Renesmee died-"

"Died?" Edward echoed in inquiry.

At the very sound of the word, Jacob's heart plummetted into his stomach—unlocking something new in him; a feeling—a stinging dread that swelled up in his chest. Nessie couldn't possibly die. He would only have himself to blame, to live with, to suffer with—alone. No. Bella must be mistaken.

But. . . died. . . It already happened. Yet Nessie was upstairs, alive and safe.

"Um, not died," Bella amended reassuringly, though she was still a horrendous liar. "Before Renesmee—I don't know—well, her fears were never this strong. Maybe Renesmee didn't get allthe reassurance she needed growing up," she explained, perpexedly unable to make eye contact with either Edward or Jacob.

A breath sounded from Bella's old room—soft and awakening—as blankets and sheets shifted, rustling around with the body wrapped in them. Then, there was tired groan, nearly a whimper of bewilderment. Edward, Bella, and Jacob rushed upstairs into the room just as her milk chocolate orbs met the environment in vast disinterest. Bella pulled up a chair beside Nessie, taking her hand gently, but the young vampire half-breed tensed automatically, and pulled away. She did not dare to look at anyone around her, keeping her eyes glued to her lap—trying to decide what was real and what was still imaginary.

"Hi, sweetie," Edward murmured tenderly, though his daughter's heart briefly jumped at the sound of his voice. "How are you?"

"I'm tired," she rasped bitterly.

Nessie appeared absolutely exhausted as if she just fought the Spartan War all by herself. Her reddish-brownish ringlets were all over the place having fluffled up from the humidity of the cave, her ever-alabaster skin had paled to a ghostly gray, and heavy bags weighed under her reddened eyes; she looked energyless, lacking her usual chipper disposition. She cleared her throat, tugging the covers closer to her body to snuggle up to the warmth.

"As you should be," Edward retorted from his side of the bed.

Jacob walked over to the right corner of the room, leaning casually on the wall and stared down for what seemed like centuries. He didn't want to fuss over Nessie with Edward and Bella watching and committed himself to remaining patient and calm—he would not kick them out of the room. He. Would. Not. But when he finally lifted his head, needing the catch a glimpse of the most beautiful girl's face, Jacob was startled to find that she looked back at him—smiling gently, as much as she could muster, and he grinned in return.

"Ren, you have to know that anything that wretched woman said was positively not true. Your father and I love you," Bella said, combing her long fingers through the hybrid's curls, but she shivered in rejection of her mother's proximity—scared and unsure.

"I know," she replied, barely audible.

"Baby, you are so full of love. No monster in this world is capable of feeling as much love as you do," Bella continued, withdrawing her hand. "You are not a monster, Renesmee Carlie Cullen. Edward and I did not a raise a monster. We raised a sweet, young lady. Do you understand me?"

"Yes, Mom. I understand," Nessie answered—coldly.

Cold. Finally, Nessie abled herself to look at her mother in the face, her milk chocolate eyes hardening like stone as her hands balled into balled fists, her knuckles going chalk-white. Her eyes narrowed into a furious glower—dark and unkinding, deciding that this person wasn't really Bella; but then, Edward rested a hand on her shoulder, putting her at ease. She released a sharp breath, while color returned to her face.

"Nothing that happened in that cave is your fault, darling," Edward told her, "but next time, I want you to remember how strong you are. Faethra doesn't know what you're truly worth, so show her."

"Okay."

"I love you."

"Yeah. Sure."

"Is there anything you want?" Bella questioned, getting up. Nessie was still recovering, and they all needed to be more patient with her.

"Yes," she retorted slowly. "May I please get some alone time with Jacob?"

"Sure thing, sweetie," Bella said.

Edward kissed Renesmee on her forehead, ruffling her hair playfully as Bella kissed her on the cheek. They lingdered for a few more seconds before walking out of the door at a human rate.

Right before they did, Nessie called to them. "Hey. . . Wait!"

"Yes, sweetie?"

She stared at them studiously, flashing them an attempt at a smile. "Mom. . . Dad. . . I love you both, too."

Edward nodded, grinning crookedly. "And we love you."

Then, they were gone, leaving Jacob and Nessie alone, though not completely. Bella and Edward had just gone back downstairs to the living room, and could easily hear anything going on between them.

"Hey," Jacob greeted shyly, taking Bella's spot on the chair next to Nessie.

"Hey," she murmured.

"Crazy day, huh?" Jacob joked awkwardly.

"Yeah. . . Listen, Jacob, I'm really sorry for everything I put you through today," the girl-woman apologized, frowning only a little.

Jacob chuckled lightheartedly, drawing her hand close to his lips and planted a kiss on each knuckle. "Are you kidding me, Nessie? I'm not the one who put a gun to my chest. I'm not the one was cornered by some deer who seriously needs a personality transfer. I'm not the one who was under a creepy spell."

"That's not why I'm apologizing," she replied with a tired giggle.

"Then, for what?" Jacob asked, puzzled.

"For you having to save me again," Nessie explained, tracing her ring finger ove the apple of Jacob's sun-kissed cheek. "I owe you my life three times over."

Her? Owing him? Seriously? The very idea sickened Jacob. "Hey, don't say that. What else could I do?" he questioned solemnly. "You would have done the same thing for me."

He knew she would—she would abandon her amazing, blessed life to save him, no matter what the cost of everyone else. She would charge into death stupidly, despite his every plea for her to hide away with him forever; she would take a beating for him, though he would have preferred to keep her locked in his arms; she would bleed her heart out until no life remained in her body, not even stopping to consider what he would become without her. She would do anything for him, just as he would for her.

"Jacob, what's wrong?" she asked, pursing her lips.

"It's just. . . Edward kind filled me in on what was said back there," he answered, shrugging in a sheepish manner. Nessie's eyes widened, her cheeks turning strawberry red. "The gist, anyway," he corrected. "And I was thinking about how Faethra ultimately made you believe we would all be better off if you weren't around. Nessie, would you really be willing to sacrifice your life for us? For. . . me?"

Although, Jacob really didn't want to hear her response—he feared it."

"In a heartbeat, Jacob," Nessie replied, blinking at him with a 'duh!' expression, and not even a nanosecond had passed between them. "I wouldn't ever want to be the cause of your hurt—never again. I would always stop it if I knew how to. I would do everything in my power to heal your pain. Don't you know that yet?"

But she didn't know that her dying on Jacob would hurt him more than anything in the world. "My life wouldn't be better without you, Nessie. It would be broken. I just want you to know that."

Half of his heart would forever be torn away from him if Nessie was no longer in his life. Hell, half of his life would be missing—more than half. Nessie would be stealing his whole universe if the day ever came she became lost to him. How would he heal from that? Jacob would never be able to give himself mercy for letting her slip away. The breeze wouldn't blow right, the earth wouldn't spin right; the sun wouldn't shine right, and everything would be wrong.

"You must really care about me to put up with my dark side," Nessie laughed, tilting her head on her shoulder.

"That's nothing. You should see that Vader dude's dark side," he quipped with a complimentary wink.

"At least he wasn't some damsel in distress."

"Neither are you."

"You're right. I'm worse than Zelda."

Jacob grinned brightly at that. "The fact that you know what the Legend of Zelda is proves just how awesome you are."

"Thanks—seriously. Thank you, Jacob, for everything, but I swear that I'm not suicidal or anything," Nessie stated, her long digits roaming through Jacob's jet-black hair as he rested his head on her lap.

"You don't have to be embarrassed about what happened, you know. There's no shame in it," he said, choking back a swell of sadness. "You weren't in your right state of mind. It was Faethra."

"That doesn't change anything. I just feel like I let it happen. I let Faethra control me," Nessie sniffled, soon followed by Jacob, whose own forest brown eyes started to glaze over. "I shouldn't have let her control me. In a way, I blame myself for not blocking her out."

"No, don't do that to yourself. You don't need to live with that type of burden. So, don't you dare let that bitch torment you like this. You're stronger than she is. You are the best thing that has ever happened to me. Don't you ever give that fact a second thought," Jacob begged her, allowing the tears to stream from her eyes.

Only a few trickled down from her eyes on to the blanket, leaving a thin trail down the path of his cheek. Nessie's rich, Hershey's irises softened, gently thumbing another droplet away from her new boyfriend's eyelash.

"You are too good to me."

"Nah. Not really."

"No. Your opinion is invalid. I am right."

"Nuh-huh. That couldn't be anymore false."

"Yeah-huh. My word is law."

His head arose from her lap, and gazed upon her. This was the girl he had been waiting his entire life to meet and there was no chance of her getting away, unless she ever asked him to leave. "Nessie. . ." Jacob started, smiling as round dimples formed in either cheek, "you're great. You're really great. Today, I almost lost you. I almost lost my chance to tell you how I feel. I want to tell you now. Ever since I met you. . . Nessie, I-"

"Jacob, stop," Nessie spoke hushedly, her heart skipping a beat. "Don't, please?" she requested. "If you're gonna say what I think you're about to say, don't say it because I almost died, Jake. Don't you dare say it because there's pressure on us. You'll spoil it."

"But, Nessie-"

"I know, Jacob, and for now we can let that be enough," she replied.

"Nessie, I need you. You can't ever doubt that again." There. He could at least tell her that much.

"Come here, Jacob. I need you to kiss me. Please?"

Jacob didn't give her request a second thought. Of course he would kiss her. Jacob tenderly pressed his mouth against his Nessie's, feeling her warm, siren breath ghost over his lips. She sighed, deepening their contact just a litle bit by resting a hand on the back of the shape-shifter's scalp to bring him closer, but quickly put a stop to that.

"What's wrong?"

"I'm thirsty."

"Well, just consider me a volunteer."

"My parents are downstairs. . ."

"Oh. Drat."

_Everybody's got a dark side_

_Do you love me?_

_Can you love mine_

_Nobody's a picture perfect_

_But we're worth it_

_You know that we're worth it_

_Will you love me even with my dark side?_

* * *

><p><strong>Author's Note: Okay, ya'll wonderful gals, in the next chapter, I'm gonna be skipping ahead a few days in the timeline. Hopefully in the upcoming installments, ya'll will really enjoy it. I don't want to throw too much drama at ya'll at once.<strong>


	41. This Time

**Disclaimer: Nothing belongs to me! Song by Jonathan Rhys Meyers!**

**Author's Note: Sorry, wonderful gals. The chapters might be coming in slower now that school has started up again. Updates can probably be expected every three weeks or so. Hopefully, you like this particular chapter. It took me forever to write it, as this has been the one I've been looking forward to writing for a very long time.**

**R&R!**

_Tonight the sky above_

_Reminds me of your love_

_Walking through winer time_

_The stars all shine_

_The angel on the stairs_

_Will tell you I was there_

_Under the front porch light_

_On a mystery light_

In the following days, Renesmee Cullen had been strictly confined to her grandfather's house—Jacob made sure of this. He stayed with her most of the time; filling their hours with a multitude of fabulous touching sessions—be it in the shower, on the sofa, on the guest room, or the basement—always bringing each other to a mind-blowing climax.

Mostly, however, Jacob and Nessie sat around the living room watching movies to make silly commentary. Other times, they talked—for what only felt like a few minutes, but suddenly the sky would darken.

When Jacob had to phase, he would call for Leah and Nahuel to watch her while he was out. He would then check in with the pack for updates, but the answers were always the same. "Not yet, boss." "We're hot on her trail." "Any day now." "We gotcha covered, Alpha-man." If this was eight years ago, Jacob would have been furious at them—or rather in reality, furious at himself for not having that yellow butt captured yet—but he knew nothing about this situation was simply accomplished. Hell, nothing about Faethra was simple.

He needed to stay at ease.

And although, he wouldn't be gone for more than a couple of hours, it alwaus felt like an eternity had passed. The guys would tease him about how he hadn't even imprinted on Nessie, but he displayed all the same symptoms of an imprint. He was going out of his mind with worry, despite knowing that she was perfectly safe with Leah and Nahuel; he had that dopey grin whenever he thought about the way Nessie's nose crinkled when she smiled; mostly, Jacob missed Nessie and he wanted to get back to her as soon as possible.

But he was always glad when he came to her. It always felt right.

As soon as he came through the door, a dazzling, award-winning smile was plastered all over his girlfriend's face, brightening up the whole galaxy in return, and that was one of the best things in the world—feeling welcome, feeling wanted by someone (finally), feeling like he belonged somewhere—anywhere—with her, feeling needed by the love of his life.

Once Leah and Nahuel had cleared out, Nessie would recap their time together. Nahuel would make them some buttered popcorn and the trio would play a game of Monopoly. "Not as adventurous as crossing the Canadian border as a mega-wolf, but we had fun," she would say, curling up against Jacob's side on the couch.

It wasn't all good times, though. Late at night, Nessie would toss and turn, squirming about next to Jacob as though she had been ambushed, somewhere alone in the forest. She'd whimper out, "Faethra, no!"

Then, he knew. . .

It was that inexplicable, mental connection Renesmee and the golden hind shared. Faethra may not have been able to lure Nessie out of the house, but she could take pleasure in controlling her nightmares. Creating nightmares. Waking her up, on other hand, wasn't too difficult. Jacob would simply hold Nessie's body down with half of the weight of his own, and then she would realize that it was nothing more than a dream.

Calming her down became easier and easier with each passing day, once Renesmee recovered from her initial trauma. Using her communicative abilities, Nessie would show Jacob what exactly went on in her nightmares as he embraced her tightly in his strong arms, seeing what she saw—the golden hind, her face covered in sinister jubilee, talking to Nessie in the middle of a dark day and threatening the lives of everyone she loved if she didn't hand Jacob's life over.

That's what she really wanted; any plan—any pain—she inflicted upon Nessie was merely a device to provoke the shape-shifter's anger. And that's why it was so easy to calm Nessie down. She refused Faethra the satisfaction of her own distress, for Jacob's sake; she would not let her mind be toyed with if Jacob's life was at stake because of it.

And Jacob could only feel touched by his girlfriend's willpower. Her ever-determined spirit was for his benefit, not her own. Nobody had ever been that courageous before—not for the purpose of protecting him.

All in all, hiding out with his favorite half-human half-vampire hybrid proved to be the equivalent of Cloud Nine. Each evening spent with their mouths molded together as their hands wove tightly was a divine paradise. If Jacob ever died, Nessie would be his heaven. Her warm, pearly-toothed smile was his white light, and her arms were his golden gate.

Granted, they did have their brief squabbles.

Today's argument was on whether or not they should attend Seth and Marguerite's wedding, which was what reeled Jacob home in the first place. Nessie and Jacob owed them their presence, she tried reasoning with him.

But Jacob's instant, infinite, and deapanned answers was always: "No."

"Oh, come on, Jake!" Nessie complained, planting her fists on either hip.

"No, Nessie," he replied, shaking his head.

"Why not?" she inquired in an agitated tone, crossing her arms over her chest and locked one knee in place.

She actually had the audacity to demand why not!

How about a psycho deer was after her? How about their lives were in danger? Shouldn't that be enough to satisfy her? Of course, Nessie must have known all that, but she didn't care. But Jacob couldn't really blame her. Being stuck in her grandfather's house for five days in a row wasn't doing anything to nurture her natural social butterfly characteristics. While she hadn't really mentioned any desire to high-tail her rear out of there since the Cave of Fear fiasco, Renesmee must have been itching to see new faces, dying to see something beyond these walls.

But they were in this situation together and he would not allow her to leave when their predicament was so damn precarious.

No matter how much she whined. No matter how much she begged. No matter how much she pouted. There was nothing she could do to change his mind. No more dumb mistakes.

"No, Nessie," the shape-shifter repeated. What part of 'no' did she not comprehend? No, no, no. Forever no. Absolutely not. Did he have to say it in a different language?

"It's Seth and Marguerite's wedding today!" Renesmee exclaimed, screwing her expression into one of sheer annoyance. "We're their best friends. You're Seth's best man and I'm Marguerite's maid of honor. We have to go!"

"For the bazillionth time, Nessie, no!" Jacb bellowed, raising his voice to his signature Alpha tone—dominant and fervent.

He didn't know what else would make her be quiet. It was the only tool he had left in his defense, but he didn't want to treat Nessie like she was on a lower rank in the wolf pack; she was his equal in every way possible, but she would leave the situation alone.

But he really should have known it wouldn't work.

"Please, Jacob?" the half-breed pleaded. She pouted her full, shell-pink lips in a sort of delicious way that made Jacob's stomach churn with lust. "All of our friends are going to be there. There's no way Faethra will try anything."

"You don't know what," Jacob countered, arching a black eyebrow in question. "She can get inside of your head now. What if she makes you believe that you're Jack the Ripper and makes you go all knife-happy?"

"Don't be crazy."

"No."

Seriously, was Nessie insane? Couldn't she let this go? Didn't she understand? He couldn't. . . He couldn't see his Nessie in a state like that again, not when he could prevent that from happening to her. Jacob never wanted to see Nessie holding a gun to her heart again; Jacob never wanted to see Nessie's cheerful spirit dulled ever again. It was too hard.

"But, Jacob. . . I will be fine," Nessie vowed, taking his hand and put it to her face. "Please?" she asked, giving Jacob a pair of large, sad puppy-dog eyes. He almost caved right then and there, but he wouldn't let her melt his stone-cold resolve. "I feel like a caged zoo animal here. Sure, you can go and phase to howl at the moon with the boys, and then send in Nahuel and Leah to babysit me. And you know what? I've been totally gung-ho about it, because I don't want to relive that ordeal again in the cave."

"Come on, Nessie. Don't give me that crap," he retorted sourly, rolling his eyes. "If you were so gung-ho about all this, why can't you just shut that hole in your face and just agree me, huh?" Would that be so hard to do?

Damn it. He loved Nessie and he didn't want to put her under house arrest, but Faethra wasn't leaving them much of a choice. He had promised himself that the cave incident would be his last screw up.

"Because I want to get out of this place!" she exclaimed, sighing in exasperation. "Look—after tonight, I will do whatever you want me to do. I'll stay quiet, I'll wear a chicken costume, I'll hop around like a bunny—whatever!"

Whatever he wanted? Tempting. Very, very, postively tempting. . . No. Wait. No.

"What does it mean so much to you?" Jacob demanded.

"Oh, I don't know," Nessie answered sarcastically, shrugging. "Maybe I want to dress up nicely with matching accessories, see some friends, and celebrate something good finally happening. Jacob. . . All I'm asking for is a night—just one night. Please?"

"With Faethra out there on the loose, one night could turn into a nightmare on Elm Street," Jacob replied, not yet budging on the issue at hand.

Nessie laughed, brushing a hand over Jacob's bicep. "No. That won't happen. You'll be there to protect me. . ." she trailed off cunningly, and fluttered her long, raven eyelashes. "Won't you?"

Jacob gulped, stupified to his spot as his eyes studied the kissable contours of his of her pink mouth. He could only manage two syllables, "Nessie. . ."

"The wedding is in four hours. Seth and Madge need to hear from us," Nessie said, a glint of knowing mischief carefully concealed in the green specks in her heated milk chocolate irises.

She thought she was winning.

And maybe she was.

Then, Nessie did the unthinkable. Nessie's bottom lip slightly jutted out, only in the mildest of pouts, not in any obviously feigned manner. Her big, brown eyes softened sorrowfully, and she tilted her chin upwardly in an adorably vulnerable fashion. She appeared needy and pitiful, like all she wanted was a few hours out of the house—not really such an extravagant request. Was that so much to ask? Yes. Yes, it was. . . Right?

Crap, crap, crap! He would not fall for that look, that look in which has been known to force men to joust to their death of give a special girl that larger portion of a shared brownie. No!

The man-wolf squeezed his eyelids tightly together, turning his head to the side as he started grinding his back teeth. "No, Nessie. . . Not with the eyes and the sad face and the—yugh! Fine! All right! Okay!" he shouted, throwing his hands up in the air defeatedly and stubbornly admitted he lost the battle. Double crap! "But only for a few hours!"

Immediately, the half-breed went giddy, bouncing up and down like Tiger, and clapped. His pride may have been diminished, but gazing upon her happiness was worth it. "Yay! Oh, thank you, Jacob! You're the best!" she squealed.

"Whatever," Jacob muttered, waving her off. He did not want to be praised for being a dumb-ass failure at life. "I'm only doing this because you promised that you would do whatever I said, and I have some pretty interesting ideas in mind." Ideas that involved Nessie baking sugar cookies in one of his tee shirts and possibly a pair of black, strappy heels.

"Oh?" Nessie queried, a sultry smirk adorning each corner of her mouth. "Does that require a French maid uniform?"

Well, that wasn't a terrible suggestion. Jacob grinned from cheek-to-cheek. "Now it does," he answered.

"No hanky panky, Jacob," Nessie replied, crinkling her nose and giggled playfully at him. "You and I have to get ready for the wedding."

"I don't know," Jacob said, shrugging as though he were unsure now. "Maybe this is a bad idea. . ."

"Nuh-uh, Jacob," the half-human half-vampire girl tsked, waggling her index finger like a barometer. "We just struck a bargain and-"

Nessie put her hands on Jacob's broad shoulders; her touch was barely a tap, but she managed to shove him backwards on to the corner of the couch. Astonishment rendered him absolutely still as Nessie straddled his lap, firmly intertwining their lips together in a fervent kiss. Jacob's temperature skyrocketed straight into the sun's core, climbing feverishly high so that he could even feel the pleasure of Nessie's lips in his boiling blood that rushed to the center of his body.

His heart pulsated from delight and amazement, gently resting his hands on her hips to bring her closer—to feel her closer. Her kiss possessed such a ferocity—a suction so damn fierce; he mistakenly mused that she was not a vampire-human creature but a siren, who was determined to suck out his soul. Hell, she could friggin' have it. He was having too much fun to stop her.

She pulled away, smiling warmly at him, and kissed his cheek. "-there's more where that came from."

It took Jacob's brain eight seconds to register her words, and then said, "Yep. There had better be."

* * *

><p><em>Jacob was grateful to his new wife's good sense to change into an outfit that appeared much more comfortable than that wedding gown—though, it did look drop-dead gorgeous on her—he had seen her in a few minutes ago. Now, her body was clad in a peach cocktail dress, matching high-heels, and a light pink cardigan. He didn't know any woman that knew how to dress so incredibly sexy and so amazingly beautiful at the same time—stunning.<em>

_Although, Jacob wished that he had been as smart. These loafers were squeezing his feet, painfully pinching his toes. But this had been his idea to bring Nessie on a quick hike up to their special cliff. He had to endure._

"_Come on, Jacob. What gives?" Renesmee Black inquired with a musical laugh. "Why are you taking me up here?"_

"_You sound like you have a problem following me," Jacob teased, pushing back a long branch on an oak tree as though it was a door and he was opening it for her._

"_Of course not," the half-breed replied, curtsying indulgently and winked as the two newlyweds reached their destination. "I would follow you anywhere, but everyone is waiting for us on the shore. It's almost time for our first dance."_

_Jacob nodded, shrugging in a sheepishly smug manner. "I know, but I wanted us to be alone. Embry is going to blast the song, and. . . Well, you know how slow dancing in front of crowds makes me self-conscience," he elaborated, threading his long, copper digits through Nessie's creamy ones. "I don't want to go all pale-faced on you during a moment that should be special for you—for us. I mean, wedding dancing are traditionally done in front of everybody, but. . ."_

"_There's nothing traditional about us, Jacob," Nessie offered in understanding. "Why start now?"_

"_Are you sure this okay?" Jacob asked. This was Nessie's night, after all, one night that he wanted her to remember for the of their lives. Eternal lives._

"_Yeah," she retorted, embedding his nether lips between her teeth. "I'm perfectly happy just being under the stars with you, in your arms. Everyone else can wait."_

"_I love you, Misses Black." Ah, that had a nice ring to it. "Marrying you is the smartest move I could have ever made."_

"_You are absolutely correct," the hybrid beamed, rolling her shoulders excitedly. She emitted a short giggle, the sound of pure wonder—a sound he was dying to hear the rest of his life. "I love you, too, Jacob Black. My husband."_

"_I can't wait to start my life with you," Jacob declared, feeling his dimples ache blithefully. He thought his body would implode. "Our life."_

"_Oh, Jacob! We'll have a house of our very own, where we can sleep in on Saturday mornings. We'll have the most beautiful children in the world! Ooh, and a cute puppy!" Nessie exclaimed elatedly, gently yanking on the Quileute's hand. She was pratctically trembling with anticipation._

"_Woah!" Jacob chuckled, amused by her beautitude. This was the life; he was finally married to Nessie. "Slow down there, Nessie. Before you turn us into a sitcom family, let's try to focus on one thing at a time—like tonight," Jacb said, bringing her closer to him in the white spotlight of the moon. "Let me hold you."_

"_You can hold me for as long as you want," she promised, fiddling with Jacob's beige tie._

_Jacob arched an eyebrow, his self-esteem quite enjoyed the way she was looking at him—ogling him, honestly. Lustfully. "You might want to retract that offer, Nessie, because I'll never let you go."_

"_Good," she murmured contently. "Let's just freeze this moment."_

"_Normally, I would agree with you, but there are other activities I'm dying to do," he grinned suggestively. His dark, liquid chocolate orbs flickered to her plump cleavage, ". . . aren't you?"_

"_Yes," she answered, playfully petting her fingers up and down his chest. "I'm willing to bet more than you are."_

"_That's a bet you would lose," Jacob joked._

"_I don't think so, shaking her head to and fro. How much money was she willing to bet? "There's so much I'm ready to do with you—places I want to explore."_

_Oh? "Exploration, huh?" Jacob queried in interest. _

_He imagined his bride, waiting in their honeymoon suite on the mattress, naked and waiting—waiting to put her hands on his body to let them roam around in a tender, shy curiosity over his hot skin. However, her hands would not make the venture alone; Nessie's eyes, usually soft, would intensify in great, hard desire. And Jacob dared to wonder if her mouth would also wander at its own accord._

"_Mhmm."_

"_I didn't know you had a little minx waiting to pounce," he whispered huskily, increasingly enthused. "I almost can't resist unleashing your inner monster right up here." That would be fun to do—out here in the open._

"_Sounds like a plan to me," Nessie purred, biting her nether lip. "I'll be your absolute favorite monster."_

"_You already are, but you oughtta stop tempting me before this dance turs horizontal," Jacob replied, trailing his thumbs over her soft, cherry mouth._

_She smirked, taunting him to surrender. "Would that be too bad?"_

"_Um, yeah," the shape-shifter said, choking back a knurl of hot lust. "Have you met your father? He would murder me. . ." He trailed a hand down her back, incautiously brushing a finger over her backside, ". . . for giving everyone a nice view of this." And he lightly squeezed her ass._

"_Over my dead body," Nessie grumbled, but Jacob didn't want to think about that._

"_How about I raise my hands a little?" Jacob's massive hands arose from his imprint's supple ass, ascending to her hips. "You come a little closer." Renesmee did so, closing the thin gap between their figures, and deliberately pressed her bosoms to his chest as her arms wrapped around his shoulders. "And-"_

_Nessie tilted her chin upward while Jacob leaned in closely, precariously as their eyes fluttered shut. Jacob attached his lips to Nessie's, already deeply delighting in the sugary, addictive chemical reaction. The bubbling joy loomed in his stomach—of his new, first, last, and only wife's kiss. Their mouths massaged over each other's, sparks of crimson magic flew to the sky—high flames irrationally burning through his heart; and to think, Jacob had the fine fortune of doing this at least a hundred times a day for the of his life. _

_They were a married now._

_Their kiss deepened—caught up in the heat, their tongues dancing in the fire. Jacob's heart lept into his thoat, pumping faster and faster. In a way that was supposed to be for later. All too soon, the kiss concluded, but the sensation of his wife's kiss lingered like a tickle, but soft. Sweet, like fruit._

_He swiftly scooted away from her on one foot, bowing to her like a humble servant, and extended a a hand as the music began to play. "May I have this dance?"_

_His Nessie rested her fingers over his, curling gently as he pulled her closer. "Yes, of course you may. You never have to ask."_

* * *

><p>And with much reluctance, Jacob forced himself into a fancy-schmancy penguin outfit while Renesmee slipped on her maid of honor dress upstairs; and then, Jacob made the longish drive up to La Push. Marguerite decided the wedding should take place on First Beach, outside with the ocean mist and the winding wings (which had been Nessie's idea, of course). In fact, the recepting was going to be held on the beach as well.<p>

"Jacob!" Seth exclaimed chipperly. The two men bro-fisted. "You made it!"

"Of course. Your wedding is the reason why I came back home for in the first place," Jacob replied, smiling back jovially. Home. Nessie. "How could I miss this?"

"Nessie made you come, huh?"

"Yeah. . ."

"It's okay, man," Seth said, shrugging nonchalantly. "If the shoe was on the other foot, I'm not sure I would bring Marguerite to any wedding with a creature like that hind out there."

But would Set ever give into Madge's every miniscule whim? Something told Jacob that yes, indeed he would.

"Somehow, Seth, that's not making me feel any better. In fact, I feel lousy," Jacob confessed, shoving his hands deep into his pockets.

"Oops," Seth uttered, half-smiling apologetically. "My bad. Well, I do appreciate you two coming anyway. Madge would be totally heartbroken if Nessie wasn't able to be her maid of honor."

"Yeah," the leader of the La Push wolf pack agreed, "and who am I two split up two best friends?"

"You have no reason to be concerned. The wole gang is here," Seth stated, gesturing to his half of the family—the majority consisting of tall, tan, and muscular men who could secretly explode into wolfzillas. Oh, yeah. And Leah. "And the Cullens, of course. If Faethra was smart, she'll stay far, far away from this wedding. Then again, if she had any brain cells, she would give up her crazy hunt and get lost."

"Then let's not accuse her of being smart."

"Good thinking, Alpha."

"Are you ready to get married, Seth?" Jacob questioned curiously, contemplating. . . Marriage. Huh.

Instantly, a humungous grin magically appeared on the younger shape-shifter's face. "More than ready. This shindig can't start soon enough."

"What is that like?" he asked, watching his old buddy observantly. He had never been around to see the marriage side of the imprint; he left before Sam and Emily's wedding, and barely carried to witness Paul and Rachel's. But the process seemed familiar.

"Nerve-wracking, amazing," Seth retorted, his smile getting dopier and dopier by the second. Yep, he was ecstatic. "I don't know. I love Madge. Ever since we met, I've been dying to marry her, but when I actually got to know her, it was like. . ." his voice trailed off abruptly, screwing up his expression as if he was trying to find the right words to say. "All those years I didn't know her was a waste of time. Why couldn't I know her all my life?"

Yeah. Those words sounded just about right—relatable, but with Nessie, it was different. It was as if he had already known her somehow. "I'm happy for you, bro."

"Thanks, Jake. That means a lot me."

The music started, a nice rendition of 'Here Comes the Bride' being played on the saxophone as Jacob rushed to go meet Nessie under the floral archway, done up in blue Forget-Me-Nots and white lillies. Jacob linked his arm with Renesmee's, a shot of cerulean electricity raced through his nerves.

As he gazed upon her, Jacob observed her maid of honor dress. It was lavenderish blue, almost with a metallic shine; the silken fabric closed around her body as it compimentary embraced her firm, round breasts. He swallowed back a lump of desire once his dark woodland eyes accidentally set upon the short line of the half-breed's delectable cleavage. Nessie's reddish-brownish tendrils adorned a teal-painted, glittery star comb tangled in there, her hair cascading like a fall river off her her porcelain shoulders.

There was something vaguely family about seeing his Nessie in this type of setting, taking short strides down the long aisle. Married. Maybe Seth and Marguerite had the right notion of doing so, by tying their futures together eternally. But Jacob couldn't drop down to one knee until he told Nessie that he was in love with her.

"Psst, Nessie," he whispered.

"Hmmm?" she hummed, glancing at him sideways.

"In case I haven't told you today, you look beautiful."

"Thank you. You look marvelous, Jacob."

Their arms unhooked, dividing to different sides of the aisle. Jacob thought that he really should have been paying attention to the ceremony, albeit he didn't care for it; he was too busy looking at Nessie the entire time, a vision of beauty in anything. Why couldn't this be their wedding? Why couldn't they share their lives together?

Over an after the I Do's—after mingling with Cullen after Cullen, after toasts from the best man and the maid of honor, after eating some butter-cream icing vanilla cake—Jacob and Nessie were hanging around the punch bowl, chit-chatting about how glorious the wedding ceremony had been. It was such a joyous occasion, so extremely familiar.

The serene mood of the ocean, the soft waves of the breeze, the tangerine shimmer of the sky as the sun began to set. It was as if it had all occurred once before; every element. . . every color. . . He secretly recollected craving everything—everything that he couldn't remember.

The happy newlyweds then walked up to them; their skin glowing in wonder.

"Hey, guys! The ceremony was so great! Congradulations to the both of you! You two look so. . . right together," Nessie stated, sipping a small gulp of apple cider.

"Oh, thank you, Ren!" Marguerite exclaimed, tightly hugging Nessie. "Today is the best day ever. I'm so relieved our best friends could make it."

"Hey!" Embry shouted, walking up to both couples. He bumped fists with Seth and Jacob, then side-hugged Marguerite and Nessie. "What's up? Great to see ya!"

He seemed a little too happy for Jacob's approval. Jacob pushed Embry back a little. "Woah, bro. Did you already find the booze?"

"Nope," Embry answered, popping the 'p,' "but that's a genius idea. Hey, Seth. How's the first hour of paradise treating you?"

Seth instantly glanced to his blushing bride. "Blissful."

"Oh!" Marguerite smirked as if she had just remembered something, holding out her bouquet of hollies, buttercups, and violets. "Ren! I wanted to personally hand you the bouquet," she smiled knowingly at Jacob, "just for luck."

"Awww!" Renesmee gushed, but shook her head. "I really do appreciate the gesture, Madge, but I think that's trying to cheat destiny."

"Or speeding it along," Madge countered smugly. "Especially if it's standing two feet from your right, why not embrace it?" She brought the flowers to her nose and took a whiff. "And your destiny smells really good."

"Tomato, potato," the hybrid shrugged.

"Come on," Marguerite pouted. "Aren't you ready to settle down?"

Nessie's smile faultered. The rhythm of her heart pulsed erratically, galloping a million miles per second; and suddenly, she couldn't look anyone in the eye. Jacob didn't understand. It wasn't hard to tell that the new Misses Clearwater was hinting at the possibility of Jacob and Renesmee getting married one day, but why did the subject make Nessie so uncomfortable? Did she not want to marry him? But then, he watched in awe as she reached for the stems of the dozens of flowers, blushing the most beautiful shade of crimson, and then closed her hand around the bouquet.

Embry rolled his eyes. "Ren is only eight. What rush is she in to sign a death certificate?" He apologetically looked at Seth and Marguerite. "No offense."

"None taken, Mister Single," Seth said with a sardonic smile.

"Jealous?"

"Yes. I'm totally jealous of a man who has a string of one-night stands with women that could possibly have STD's."

"Ouch."

"You need some ice for that burn?" Nessie laughed.

"Jake, back me up, bro!" Embry pleaded, nudging his best friend's elbow. "You know how good the single life is. Hot women, beverages of the alcoholic persuasion, more hot women."

Did he ever sound as pathetic when he was a single man? "Sorry, Embry." He wasn't really sorry at all. How could he be? Jacob wrapped an arm around Nessie's waist, tenderly pulling her closer to him. "I have Nessie now. What can I say? Being single isn't all its cracked up to be."

"Then, I guess Seth and Marguerite aren't the only ones that deserve a congrats." Embry chuckled slyly, though he nodded in understanding. "Maybe Nessie needs that bouquet more than anyone here—for good luck."

"I couldn't agree more," Madge agreed, resting her head on Seth's shoulder. "Just shut up and smile, Nessie."

"Thank you, Marguerite," Nessie murmured as Jacob plucked a buttercup from the flower arrangement, and gently slid it amongst his girlfriend's auburn strands.

"Awww!" Madge uttered in adoration, clasping her hands together.

"That makes you look so adorable, Ren. It reminds me of when you used to roll around in Esme's flowerbeds and you would get flower petals stuck in your hair," Seth said, laughing to himself.

Jacob grinned at Nessie, studiously staring at in a strange manner. What Seth said. . . He could almost picture it. He could almost picture her, as a much younger version of the woman next him. It felt like a memory—a memory of a toddler girl rolling around in her grandmother's garden, ruining yet another outfit her Aunt Alice had bought her, but Jacob was always delighted to see her that way. Nessie could really look like a child of nature, prancing around in the new spring season. But he was never around to see that.

"I bet you were a cute, little thing," Jacob said, moving his lips against the soft flesh of her shoulder. "I kind of wish I had known you back then."

"Me, too," Renesmee replied gently.

The DJ spoke over the microphone, inviting the newlywed couple to the open space amongst the dining tables and the guests.

"Misses Marguerite Clearwater, will you accompany me to the dancefloor?"

"Why, of course."

They walked away and positioned themselves for their first dance as man and wife as Embry, too, wandered off to the cake.

"Ren!" Leah called out, waving as she scampered over to her imprint.

"Leah!" the half-human half-vampire whispered enthusiastically, "You look wonderful!"

"So do you," Leah complimented her with a possessive hug, "but you really shouldn't be here."

"I'm glad somebody agrees with me," Jacob mumbled smugly under his breath.

"Yeah, but you still let her come anyway," Leah grumbled sternly, crossing her arms over her chest.

Renesmee rolled her eyes and scoffed. "Whatever. Faethra isn't anywhere closer by and I'm perfectly fine."

"Be that as it may, young lady, you should get home as soon as possible," Leah commanded, arching an eyebrow—unamused by the attitude Nessie chose to cop.

"No way! I want to have fun tonight!" Nessie reasoned passionately, hoking up the skirt of her dress.

"Fun that could potentionally get you killed?"

"Sure, sure."

"Renesmee, go home."

"Leah, I know you mean well," Nessie exhaled sharply, slightly perturbed, "but there's no need to be overdramatic. I can take care of myself."

"Yeah, right," the woman shape-shifter sneered violently, irritated. "Your last encounter with the golden hind didn't exactly prove that."

"I'll speak with you later, Leah," she stated firmly, glaring vehemently at her imprinter. "I'm going to myself cliff."

"Oh, no you're not not!" Leah ordered, grabbing Renesmee by the wrist.

Nessie jerked her arm away. "Yes, I am." A cold fact. And then, Leah let the topic drop.

She didn't storm off, she didn't run away, but she merely walked away from Leah and Jacob, the latter of the two dangerously mesmerized from watching her fluid strut. When he finally realized what was happening, he jogged to catch up with Nessie.

"Wait, Nessie!" the man-wolf beckonded gently to her. "You're going without me?"

She shrugged nonchalantly, inhaling the cool air lightly, and then exhaled calmly. "Well, if you wanted to talk with everyone for awhile, I would understand. I just want to wind down for a little while."

"Are you sure?" Jacob questioned, strolling a few strides behind her.

"Yes, it's okay," she retorted.

"No, I mean—are you sure it's safe up there?"

"Super safe," Nessie answered reasurringly, tracing her tongue along her bottom lip. "Nothing bad could ever happen to us here." Here, being the cliff. Their cliff. A place of sanctuary.

Jacob held out his hand for hers, grinning brightly at Nessie. "Would you like to dance with me, Nessie?" He offered just as she accepted his hand, beaming at him. "That's what you came here to do, right?"

"True," she giggled, pursing her lips. "I would love to dance with you, Jacob."

_Their bodies closed together tenaciously, giving into the rhythm of their fiercly beating hearts as the music swayed._

The Earth's breath blew against his skin, unable to soothe the needy ache for her proximity. Instead, it steadily grew—consuming him like quick sand.

_Chortling to himself, he spun the girl-woman out of his embrace, then pulled her back in._

Nessie giggled, her laughter was like a symphany of the sweetest, softest music—like a carousel of elation—as he dipped her down low.

_She put a hand to his face, caresssing the subtle dimple imprinted on his russet cheek. _

Her fingertips felt amazing on his skin, numbing everything in Jacob's body, except the love in his heart.

_He brought her back up, his eyes momentarily fixated on the always flowing movement of Nessie's copper springs._

Jacob memorized the autumn colors of the tendrils, falling further in this love he couldn't be saved from. There wasn't a chance of him surviving from her hold on him. And he didn't want to.

_The cool night's breeze drifted through the trees, guiding Jacob's feet to step—one, two, three, four, one, two, three, four._

He grasped his russet hands around her slender waist, raising her high into the air.

_Nessie squeaked in surprise, Jacob twirling her around thrice._

Her feet were set back down, now holding him tighter than ever before—for safety.

_Jacob would never let anything bad happen to her._

"You're really light on your feet," Jacob said, slipping an arm under the back of Renesmee's knees.

"What can I say?" Nessie asked rhetorically. "I learned how to fly in the last minute, in your arms." She laughed breathlessly, dizzy as he spun and spun her around. When he let her back down again, Nessie couldn't find her balance; so, they stood still for countless moments. "Thank you, Jacob," she murmured, softly scraping the strawberry flesh of her lips against his adam's apple. "You're not bad either."

"Thanks," he responded, attempting to get his heartbeat to relax. "Wooh," Jacob sighed tiredly, the universe still spiraling, circling around the young couple in their stillness. He glanced down to the show, only a few guests remaining. "People are clearing out. You wanna head back to Charlie's?"

"Not yet, Jacob," Nessie replied slowly, sitting down right there in the dirt. She was going to ruin her dress and she didn't even care. "I just want to stay with you here a little while longer."

"I can't blame you," Jacob said, plomping down adjacent to her. At last, his the frantic beating of his heart had begun to calm—maybe. He wasn't sure if it was slowing down or getting faster. "It's so breathtaking out here."

Nessie nodded in agreement, pointing upward. "Even Artemis and Myriah seem to be a little bit happier. I think they're happy for Seth and Marguerite."

"They're almost touching," Jacob observed aloud, draping an arm over Nessie's shoulders. "They got closer."

"I suppose so," she replied absent-mindedly, utilizing his shoulder as pillow. "Their kind of love keeps striving against the impossible. True love."

"I've been searching for a love like that my whole, entire life," Jacob confessed quietly, feeling the tips of his Nessie's fingernails scrape against the lines of his palm, leaving ticklish, buzzing sensations upon his hand. "You know, minus the whole death, never getting to touch thing."

"Fair enough. I don't really desire any tragedies in my love life," Nessie admitted, laughing softly when Jacob kissed her forehead.

His intense ebony irises followed Renesmee's sharp, discernful fixation up to the indigo sky—toward the twinkling, alabaster stars. The night was deceithful and honest at the same time, and no longer was his heart all right holding the truth in. Jacob wanted to expose everything his heart was capable over, dying to discard the red brick shield and brass armor from what this love was becoming and be real to someone for once in his life. He was ready to fall into her.

"We can learn from their mistakes," Jacob stated, holding her just a little closer than he ever had before.

"We?" Nessie queried, catching on to the implication in her boyfriend's tone. She lifted her head from his shoulder, searching his eyes in confusion.

A wide smile spread across his face, nodding. "We," he confirmed. "I'm in love with you, Nessie."

Nessie's expression lit up instantly, and he knew that he made the right decision in telling her. "Say it again."

"I love you."

"I'm in love with you, too, Jacob."

_I've been sitting_

_Watching life pass from the sideliness_

_Been waiting for a dream to seap into my blinds_

_I wondered what might happen if I left it all behind_

_Would the wind be at my back? _

_Would I get you off my mind_

_This time_


	42. Your Call

**Disclaimer: Nothing belongs to me. Song by Secondhand Serenade.**

**Author's Note: So. . . You may or may not like this chapter. Just a little warning—there's a lot more touching in those one.**

_Stripped and polished_

_I am new_

_I am fresh_

_I am feeling so ambitious_

_You and me_

_Flesh to flesh_

_Cause every breath that you will take_

_When you are sitting next to me_

_Will breathe life into my deepest hopes_

_What's your fantasy?_

"I love you," Jacob declared in what could only be described as the truth, the honest-to-god truth from every fiber of his being. It was a meaningless torture to hold it back any longer. There would never be a need to restrain these words ever again. "I love you, Nessie," he repeated gently. "I have always been in love with you. You. It's always been you."

There.

He should have told her a million times, and he would tell two million times to make up for the lost time.

_Stop it! _

_No! _

_You can't!_

It was crazy—he could practically put himself away for being this over-the-moon, irrevocably, eerily in love with this Cullen girl.

_His_ girl.

Renesmee Carlie Cullen.

_His_ Nessie.

There was no woman in the universe that could compare. Renesmee was his missing half, the woman he had searched for, and the only person that could make the pain worth it. Jacob didn't need an imprint to tell him that she was perfect for him. He had known it from the get-go, from the very first time he laid eyes on her a mere fourteen days prior.

Not in a thousand years, not even in a parellel universe, would Jacob have ever started to think that his former arch nemisis' daughter, as well as the daughter of his teenage crush, would turn out to be the woman he had been waiting to meet his entire existence. The way she instantly had Jacob trapped in her snare with those mesmerizing pools of Hershey's milk chocolate flickered over to him for just a second, and then neither of them could look away. Even when pretending to hate her, Jacob still couldn't disconnect his gaze from her—couldn't stop thinking about her.

That week before he returned to La Push, that girl from the cafe was all he could think about. He remembered wondering what he name was, who she was friends with, if she had a boyfriend, and if she was thinking about him, too. . .

How could he keep the truth from her? Nessie was the best thing to ever happen to him.

Perhaps, he belonged to the insanity—he belonged in a sanitarium somwhere in a far-off, imaginary land, along with Dorothy and Alice, and probably deserved to be locked away in a lightless dungeon—or at least, that's what a small, loud, slowly fading voice telling him. Despite himself, there was a knawing need to deny everything to her.

_Stop! _

_No!_

_She doesn't need you!_

_You can't do this to her! _

_You can't do this to yourself again! _

_Please, no!_

_Not again!_

Two weeks. Jacob had only known Nessie for a fortnight.

Adults—adults in their right minds—normally take three to six months to fall in love, confessing so when everything is going right in the relationship. Children only needed second to fall in love, and then mere moments to admit it. Falling in love was the paramount of all adventures, the pinacle of action and emotion. For Jacob, however, all it took for him to love Nessie was a look—not even a look, a glance.

He needed fourteen days to tell Renesmee that he loved her. Only two weeks—two weeks that felt like a lifetime wasted in keeping a secret that was blatant to everybody else. In all honesty, Jacob wished he had told a thousand times before. He should have told her that day in the cafe; he should have told her when the encountered again; he should have told her after their first kiss; he should have told her every day.

"I love you, Jacob," the vampire-human hybrid whispered, running her hand over his russet cheek. "Nothing will ever change that."

She lowered her back to the ground, lying down; her thousands of penny-colored strands of hair splayed across the floor. A little smile, catching the pale rays of the moon, laced in the pinkness of her plump lips. There was a soft question concealed in the honey ring around her pupil—a fiery, ferocious secret enflaming those milk chocolate irises.

"What are you doing?" Jacob asked, absent-mindedly lying down with her.

The rate of his heartbeat increased considerably, belonging to this moment. But that wasn't enough. He wanted to belong to her.

"Jacob, will you please kiss me?" she inquired, gently pulling him over the top of her body.

But he didn't fully understand what she was asking him for. Of course he would kiss. Why would she ask such a silly question?

"Yes. Yes. You never have to ask me for a kiss, Nessie," Jacob stated, ghosting the side of his thumb over the rosy apple of Renesmee's right cheek.

"Then, be quiet and kiss me already, Jacob," she commanded him teasingly.

Finally obliging Nessie's request, Jacob slowly lowered his body—just barely over hers—and kissed the woman that mattered most in the world to him. Their mouths molded harmoniously together, being careful of their tenderly growing heat. His tongue traced the tip of Nessie's lips in a desperate plea for passage into her mouth, in which she readily complied. Jacob was greedy for more, soaking in the strawberry, apple flavors on to his taste buds—needing her more and more.

Suddenly, Jacob felt Nessie's fingers encircle around his neck tie, loosening unhurriedly. Before he could realize what he was doing, Jacob pulled away from her and brushed her hands away.

A short, frustrated whine rang from her lips and she huffed. "Did I upset you? What am I doing wrong?"

"No, baby. It's just. . ." he swallowed, mentally nothing the sparks of desire in her eyes as she attempted to will him closer to the tight grip of her legs; but he resisted. "I'm not sure if you know what you're trying to do here. Do you?" Jacob queried, nervous of what her answer would be. "Because if you're not, I don't think we can. . ."

Did she know exactly what she wanted?

Nessie took a human second to respond, and then nodded her head once. "Yes. Jacob, I love you and you love me. I don't see any reason why I shouldn't show you."

"Show me?" Jacob repeated increduously, shaking his head while his eyes widened in astonishment. She couldn't possibly believe that she owed him sex, could she? "Nessie, if you think I said what I said because I want something fromyou, you don't need to. I swear—I love you."

"Jake," Nessie exhaled patiently, her cheeks blushing cherry red. "I. . . Um, I didn't really mean it like that."

"Really?" Then, what way did she mean it? "Because you're under no obligation here," Jacob said truthfully.

"I love you, Jacob Black, and right now I don't care if this is a wreckless decision. I don't care if I'm being stupid. I love you, and there is no other person I will ever want to share all of myself with," Nessie retorted assuredly, not a singular, even miniscule, trace of uncertainty anywhere on her beautiful face.

"Right here?"

"Nobody else is around."

"Nessie, I don't want you to jump into something that you'll regret in the morning."

"Well, I do appreciate you looking out for my well-being, Jacob. . ."

"But. . . ?"

"But I highly doubt I could ever regret any moment spent with you," the half-human half-vampire teenager replied sweetly. "Could you ever regret me?"

"Never," the shape-shifter confirmed, looking her dead in the eye. "Not for as long as I'm breathing. As long as you're in my life, there isn't anything I regret."

"Then, don't hold back," she murmured, her fingers moving to unbutton his shirt. "I'm going to share every part of myself with you, Jacob. Can you do the same for me?"

"You know I would. I want to, Nessie," the man-wolf crossbreed promised, kissing her forehead affectionately.

"I love you, Jacob," Nessie proclaimed in hushed tones, continuing on removing Jacob's stubborn dress shirt. "I think I might have loved you all my life. You're everything. . . You're everything I need in this world, okay?"

Jacob grinned down at her, the most magnificent species of woman in the universe, as the pale streams of luminescence gleamed from the winking stars. Nessie looked so. . . in her element. Again, he kissed her—he kissed her like a mad man—and drank in the ectasy of Nessie's exotic taste. When she finished up with his shirt, he shrugged off his jacket and shirt before throwing away his tie.

She groaned hungrily, smashing her rounded chest in his much flatter ne. He could sense the growing anticipation and couldn't help but be flattered by her impatience, but he had to find a way to slow down her pace (otherwise, this experience would be too painful for her). And Jacob didn't want to harm Renesmee. The shape-shifter wanted to take his time making love to Nessie, fulfilling her every need with gentility.

"Jacob. . . Jacob, I want to be closer to you," Nessie whimpered, loosening Jacob's belt; subsequently, making it all the more challenging not to attack her with his own desires.

It felt like the blood in his body could only reach his nether regions and his heart, the suffering of keeping control nearly unbearable. God, he needed her.

"I'm right here, beautiful," Jacob stated.

He lovingly ran his forest-brown irises over her gorgeous face, and that was all the reminder he needed to get a hold of himself. Jacob wad determined to show that his earth revolved around Nessie's sun, that her love was the sweetest and the most merciful of all sins, and that there were going to be a thousand more instances beyond this night he would gladly spend entangled her.

First, on the other hand, he would focus on this night. He would make it all about her, not him. She was much more important than him anyway.

His hands closed around her wrists, pinning them to the ground at her sides. "Nessie, I am right here," he told her again reassuringly, longing to get through to her—to convince this was the best way. "How much closer could we possibly get?"

"Much," she murmured, nearly out of breath.

Jacob grinned, nodding in understanding; in truth, he felt the exact same way. He waited to strip of his pants, finally focusing on getting Nessie a little bit bare. Slipping his hands under her back, Jacob lifted the half-breed girl slightly from the ground as his opposite hand unzipped her bride maid's dress. In turn, she attempted to squirm out of the slim fabric, choosing to keep her hands occupied with his pants.

"Chill out," he chuckled nervously, placating his girlfriend by discarding his pants.

Oh, god.

Oh, shit.

Blood pumped roughly through his member, raging vehemently like thunder until he silently mused it would burst from Jacob's stubborn restraints. His russet skin practically sizzled against Renesmee's creamy digits—steam radiating from their pounding hearts, fogging his good sense and will to take this slowly.

He laid her back down gently, memorizing her in this instance. Porcelain skin shimmering the moonlight, milk chocolate irises smoldering like a crackling flame, her cheeks flushed like an apple, and her coppery tendrils splayed over the ground. Jacob smiled down at Nessie, the miracle creature, and found himself unable to believe that anyone could need—not simply want—him like this, in the passion of the moon's spell.

There was no way this could be reality. And goodness, she was positively beautiful. Why did she pick him? Of every man in the world that would immediately damned his soul to merely win her heart, she chose Jacob, the one whom was the most reluctant to give up his heart to her. Now, he would happily give up everything he was to her—his name, his heart, his soul, his self. Whatever she wanted, all she had to do was take it. But she wouldn't. Nessie was a giver, and she had given him love. How could she?

It went against rhyme and reason for Nessie to love him in return.

"Why are you staring?" she inquired, chewing on her bottom lip.

"If you were me, you'd stare, too," Jacob replied, experiencing the undeniable warmth of her cheeks through his fingertips, brushing them across her pinkening flesh.

She was left in a dark blue lace bra and matching panties, trembling in greedy anticipation. Poor thing. In most cases, this would have been considered teasing. . .

He couldn't resist the temptation to put his hands on her, gently sliding his index finger up and down the length of her panties and felt the slick texture, until he found her small bundle of nerves.

Nessie groaned in soft delight, and Jacob rubbed her clit and fro as he drowned in the potent scent of her arousal. Oh, good god. Her scent was paradise, the sweet aroma wavered through the night air, making his heart storm in a frantic chaos. Renesmee was wet—very, blatantly wet for him; she wanted him.

Jacob continued his ministrations, pressing down on her pulsating button of fire. He earned a tiny mewl from Nessie, whose thighs parted wider. Her body knew what it needed, but her other parts knew what she wanted—his attention. His touch. And that's exactly what Jacob gave her, as he brushed his thumb over the top of her clit.

"_Jay-guhp_!" Nessie whimpered, elevating her hips upward to meet the rhythm of his digits. "Hmmm, Jacob!"

"Tell me what you need, Nessie," Jacob commanded patiently, massaging his lips across her collarbone.

"Please. . . !" Nessie trailed of in exclamation, stifling yet another moan.

"What do you want, Nessie? What is it?" Jacob queried, stroking his knuckle over her raspberry nether lip.

"Jacob, I love you. I need you," came her roused, trembling voice.

Chortling heartily, the Native American man dipped a finger underneath her panties, tearing it at the seams with a _wriiiiitch_! Nessie squeaked in astonishment, her blush deepening in embarrassement. Jacob waited a moment to go ahead, frightened that he might have gone too far and she would stop him, but a second later she nodded in approval.

With her permission, Jacob slipped his middle dinger into Nessie's warm womanhood, moving almost too cautiously. He reveled her in her slick candescence, secretly wishing to go faster than he was, but she was still so tight. It was nearly impossible to stretch Nessie out enough, to get her ready so that they could make the fit. But when the half-vampire half-human girl-woman responded with a groan, adorned in pleasure, he knew that she was okay for now, and then wiped her tongue around her bottom lip. Jacob enjoyed that, so he experimentally inserted another finger.

Nessie pet Jacob's chest, over his pectoral muscles and down his bulging abdominals. He could sense the rising dither of her touch; her body felt like a blazing inferno and his own body, consequently, responded to her fire. His fingers swirled around from within her tight walls, as she instinctively contracted to take in his incredible titillation further. Whenever she emitted sounds of greedy, irritated arousal, his eardrums rejoiced.

"Oh, my god! Jacob!" Nessie shouted, her fingernails burying into his broad, sun-kissed shoulders wen his digits curled against her engorged g-spot. "N-No!"

He stopped everything he was doing. "What's wrong, Nessie? Did I hurt you? Are you all right?"

"No, I'm fine," she replied, shaking her head. "I'm just. . . I'm ready."

"Nessie," Jacob murmured partly exasperated and partly loving, he didn't really want to hold back either. "We don't need to rush."

"I'm not rushing," Nessie said assertively, the righthand corner of her mouth curving into a seductive half-smirk. "But I don't want your fingers, Jacob. I want you—the real way."

To demonstrate her point, Renesmee sat up and put her mouth to the base of Jacob's throat. She stayed there for what seemed like hours, moving her lips caressingly along his neck. Jacob could barely feel her plump lips wandering over his skin, but the chemicals bubbling beneath his pores was proof of her heaven, and then he felt something hard and smoothe.

Her teeth.

Nessie dipped her razorous teeth into Jacob's beating flesh, not enough to pierce it however.

"You smell good," Nessie purred, feathering her tongue along a thick vein.

Jacob groaned, his lower self hardening stone. "F-Fu-ck!"

She pushed him back on the ground. Her ever-darkening brown eyes observed Jacob in deep lust—in want and need, stirring up his own emotions tying a knot in the pit of his stomach. An extremely Cheshire grin dripped from the edges her flushed mouth, mocking him affectionately. Nessie reached behind her back, and then a nanomoment later, her bra laid in a pile of forgotten clothes in the dust. Jacob licked his lips, his pupils expanded as he watched each nipple pucker in freedom out of her areolae.

All so familiar. . .

They had been together, perhaps, in this way before. Jacob could almost recall a night, possibly even dozens of nigts, similar to this one.

One, were the innocent orb was just as full, where the dazzling lights of the sky were just as bright, where Artemis and Myriah were just within centimeters from on another, and a night in which his September-sunned angel was always the most beautiful. It may have been a rare night, without cold and without raindrops, in which he had lain on the dusty ground while Nessie peered down at him with generous love.

For only a moment, the shape-shifter's brain twirled around in his skull thrice, entranced by Nessie's. . . well. . . her everything.

He became lost in a bewildered tizzy, digging his fingernails in the cold dirt for balance. Pleasure and confusion were the only things to register through his mind, life and love surging through his growing length. All mythical creatures and their destiny be damnced, fore he could only ever love this woman.

This familiar woman.

But Nessie sensed Jacob's brief deja vu, speaking in a hushed tone, "You feel it, too."

"Always," he stated evenly.

"It's okay," Nessie nodded, reviving the warmth of his heart simply by letting her hand glide ovver his smooth, hard, and russet skin, the bulging plateus rising from his stomach. "Go with it. Don't question it. Maybe we're supposed to remember a previous life or something. You and are meant to be together. It's kismet."

"I don't care," Jacob retorted in all honesty, shaking his head. It really didn't matter why they were together, just that they were. The knowledge that lied in his soul, the singular truth that he needed, was that true love was never incorrect, or silenced, as long as Nessie breathed. "I don't care what it's called. I need you."

"Shhh, Jacob. You will never have to need me again. I am yours," Nessie said with an agile smile.

She sewed her soft fingers through his rough ones, bringing them to touch the top of her left breast. Jacob felt the fast flutter of Renesmee's golden heart, a colorful magic tingling at his caress. Her heart was gorgeous, the sound like a hummingbird's wings as it sought nectar from him.

Replacing his fingers with his mouth, he sat up with Nessie. His lips rand over the rhythm beneathe her chest, savoring the hybrid's goodness. There was not a doubt in his mind that he loved her, but even in their bliss he would never deserve Nessie's love. Renesmee shuddered lightly, the smell of her arousal soaking the wind. Jacob's head whirled for Nessie, a knot tugging on his stomach.

"Jacob," she mewled slowly, her pitch slightly heightened to a yell. "Jacob!"

"Nessie. . ."

The Quileute swallowedd Nessie's breast devouringly into his mouth, absorbing its vanilla taste upon his tongue. Nessie was so soft—so supple. He flickered his tongue back and forth across Nessie's hardened nipple, earning more of her little ringing noises of love frequent—his name sirening from her hitched voice. Jacob was drunk off Nessie, intoxicated by her weighty breast

His mouth watered in a lecherous hunger as his nose caught wind of moist fire pouring from between the half-human half-vampire's legs, flowing while poor Nessie could hardly contain the hundreds of calls from her whet appetite, the familiar syllables of his name, "Jay-cuhb! Jaaaygub! Jacob!" eminating from her excited tone over and over again. Damn it. He wanted to more. He needed more. Jacob switched over to her other breast, lightly scraping his teeth on her erect, pink bud. She tasted like heaven—like paradise.

"Okay, okay, okay. That's enough there, Jake," Nessie exhaled, pushing Jacob back a little. "I know you must be having a lot of fun down there, but I do need you," she giggled against his ear, as her lips brushed over his lobe, "lower. . ."

And really, what willpower did he have left to deny her?

"I love you, Nessie," the shape-shifter murmured in adoration, shifting around so that his underwear was long gone from his body.

His warm breath danced along the alabaster colors of his soon-to-be lover's skin, causing her to shiver inside his grasp. Jacob peppered Nessie's neck in quick kisses, grinning to himself in wonder. He could feel the muscles in his arms begin to quiver—nervous, but eager—and possibly even a little scared.

What if he messed this up?

What if he ended up turning off Nessie to sex for the rest of her life?

What if this wasn't actually happening?

What if this was a dream and he was about to wake up?

"I love you, too, Jacob," Nessie replied sweetly. "I need you to know that I'm not doing this to compete with the other women you've slept with, but I hope this is," she gulped shyly, biting the inside of her cheek, "adequate for you."

Chortling at Renesmee's frivolity, Jacob traced a fingertip over the outline of her stunning, porcelain face, knowing that this face is the only one he would ever want to see again.

"You are the best in every way possible. Don't even try to tell yourself otherwise," he jokingly tutted.

Nestling herself betwixt the ground and Jacob's boiling body, laying comfortably on her back. Jacob inhaled her fragrance, addictive like sugar, and wished that he could hold in his breath forever, but the time came when he exhaled. Nessie stretched out her legs, nodding at him. "I'm ready."

"Okay, but you can back out at any time," Jacob said in precaution. . . Caution. . . Protection. . . ! "Wait, hold on! I don't have a condom! I didn't know that we were going to. . ."

"Don't worry, Jacob. Just don't spoil this," she giggled softly, licking her lips. "We're okay."

"Are you sure?"

"Yeah."

"Okay."

Jacob gulped a little ball of anxiety, inching his proud, prodding staff into Nessie's womanhood. Nessie pulled her lips under her teeth, stifling a shriek of excrutiating pain. He was about to withdraw when the half-breed hissed at him to stay still, and he, of coursed, obeyed obediently. And so, he lingered within her wet canal, for an extra minute. He enjoyed—cherished—being inside of her, as if Renesmee had engulfed his soul with her own.

Finally, Renesmee nodded at him to move, but Jacob wasn't certain that he should.

"Really, it's all right," she murmured through gritted teeth. "I promise that I'm fine."

Jacob complied, carefully inching more of himself into Nessie. Another new scent pierced the cool, midnight air—not sweet, but salty. Metallic. He could smell it pooling on the ground as his hard tool continued to invade her body, filling her as if she was where he was meant to be; what was astonishing to him is that Nessie welcomed him in—his length and his girth, though Jacob had done the unthinkable and hurt her.

Slowly, Jacob withdrew, and Nessie grimaced tightly. She was good at masking her pain, pulling him closer as her legs wrapped around his lower torso. Why, he would never know, still wanting to form a new connection between their awakening needs.

"Go slow," Nessie whispered, elevating her hips to meet his. Again, Jacob pushed in. He realized that he had never taken a girl's virginity before and he really wasn't sure how to go about it, except that a slow pace was about all she could handle. And so, Jacob kept his thrusts patient, feeling Nessie's channel squeeze around his his erection, her warm breath gently exhaling her felicity. Jacob tied their mouths together in a calm kiss, taking her in. Everything was going to be okay.

"Nng!" Nessie groaned, her chest slithering underneath his anticipatedly, clinging to Jacob's body as if he would float away from her.

"I'm right here, Nessie. Shhh, I'm here for you. Right here," he reminded her, unbearable heat boiling in his loins.

In, then out. In, then out. In, then out. Then, back in, searching for right buttons to press—listening attentively, watching for her signs. Jacob pumped into Nessie, swirling his hips punctuatedly in a manner that, by the sound of it, she found very intriguing, and he did it again. Her exhilarating aroma flooded through his senses, practically able to taste her sugary sweet juices on the tip of his tongue, and understood her urgency for him and sped up just a little bit.

Dear goodness gracious, her faint, little mewls were musical, her voice like a soft whistle playing on his heartstrings like a simple instrument. There was an intensifying tension rolling around betwixt their bodies, as the watery winds swept over his bare, copper skin, yet it wasn't enough to cool him off.

"N-N-Nessie," Jacob stammered, hissing in a pleading tone.

"I'm okay. You can go at you're own speed, Jake," the half-breed permitted, pursing her lips.

Somehow, despite imself, Jacob did the exact opposite. He didn't know why. Maybe it was because he got off on torturing himself, maybe it was because he wanted to make this last, drawing out every single, solitary sensation—the tips of her sharp nails burying into his upper arms in a tickle, her white-lily flesh smoothing below his russet skin, just her, just Nessie—lingering between the shape-shifter and half-vampire half-human whenever he pressed up into Nessie's secret button of nerves and delight. Jacob was determined to commit every last sounds, taste, touch, and sight to his eternal memory. He almost couldn't bare to blink, frightened of missing a second. Yeah, that's why he wanted to be careful. He wanted to make this count.

"Jacob!" Nessie shouted, shielding her milk chocolate irises behind her eyelids

"Keep your eyes open," Jacob commanded huskily, feeling her getting closer and closer to the precipice of orgasm. "Keep your eyes on me, baby."

She obliged, reopening her eyes, though the colors weren't clear; they were clouded with lust and need. The sweet, tight torment of Nessie's walls attempting to consume Jacob's proud manhood, while she writhed; her heart accelerated like a train locomotive, Nessie struggling to focus her eyes on Jacob. His body swellwed with eletrical thrills, watching Nessie's—feeling Nessie—waiting over the line, nearing a burst of pure bliss.

"Ja-Jacob!" Nessie gasped, a tiny tear forming at the corner of her raven-rimmed eyelashes. Pausing, Jacob used the tip of thumb to brush it away and kissed her cheek. "Don't stop! Please!" she cried. "Jake! Uung, Jacob, please!"

He continued, stroking deeper and faster. On impact, Nessie came undone. She clenched down on him tenaciously, clamping on Jacob's member like a vice, and elicited a pained, yet desperate, snarl from him. Nessie contracted snuggly around him, her amazing pools of fresh hot cocoa fixated on his forest brown ones—staring into him and calculating Jacob's soul. Truly seeing Nessie's world explode into fragments until it was only them was a beautiful sight to behold. Hot fluid hurricaned around his length, becoming lost within Nessie's conclusion. . .

Jacob couldn't take it anymore.

Feeling like a kite slipping through Renesmee's loosening grasp and floating above the cottoncandy clouds, feeling like a rock shooting straight into the atmosphere, Jacob went off like a stick of dynamite within Nessie's body—emptying. The world around him blurred into a Monet, save the woman below his body, as Jacob's nerves reveled in the blinding, incredible shock of completion—the most wonderful of his young life—draining. His heart was about to combust; he earnestly believed that gravity no longer existed and he would drift off into space, but somehow he didn't. Nessie held on to him, molding her lips to his with a fierce fervor until he forgot what his last name was. She kept Jacob with her on earth, the two riding out their highs.

Then, the universe stopped—the Earth ceased to rotate, the planets aligned, and only Nessie was the center, the center of Jacob's gravity, holding him here now.

_I was born to tell you I love you_

_And I am torn to do what I have to _

_To make you mine_

_Stay here with me tonight_


	43. Never Let Me Go

**Disclaimer: Nothing ever belongs to me. Song by Florence and the Machine.**

**Author's Note: No, I'm not dead and have no intention of giving up on this story. Hopefully, you will continue reading it as well. Also, because of the Breaking Dawn Part Two coming out, I may have to rewrite some stuff so I can stay true to the movie dialogue as well as the books... In case, there are any parallels I want to dig deeper on in following chapters...**

**But anyway, because you are incredibly smart, you asked me if Jacob imprinted in the last chapter. Did he, though? I don't know. That did seem to be what I was implying. Lol. But yes. You know it and I know it. Will Jacob ever figure it out for himself, though? You'll just have to read and see.**

**R&R!**

_Though the pressure's hard to take_

_It's the only way I can escape_

_It seems a heavy choice to make_

_And now I am under all_

_And it's breaking over me_

_A thousand miles down to the sea bed_

_Found the place to rest my head_

Drowning. . .

Jacob was drowning in a deep blue sea of dreams—of bizarre, abnormal dreams—a montage of moments that he and Nessie spent together, or perhaps they were memories they would someday make with each other. A wedding—with a too-long aisle that made it seem like Nessie would never reach him in time before he could implode, a humble marriage—where each morning started a great, new adventure, and then there were a million tears, that drenched from his heart until his body went completely dry from too much sorrow.

In his sleep, Jacob forgot how to breathe. Any signs of life were briefly stifled in his belly, caught between his stomach and his chest. Jacob's heart nearly couldn't compensate, quickening its beating to keep him alive, but it might night have worked; because just then, a breeze flowed over his resting body. It was a gentle wind, carrying the almond-milk fragrance of the woman next to him and waved over Jacob, recitating oxygen into his body once more. Responding immediately, his heart eased and his breathing began simply again.

These flashes of a thousand instances were too real, too alive, to be mere dreams, but somehow seemed too far away to be memories. Yet something in him—an intuition, perhaps?—kept calling to him.

No. It wasn't possible.

A small, singular ray of yellow light peeked out from the fluffy curtains of clouds, coloring the sky a relaxed pink hue that combined Heaven and Earth with the orange orb. Already gliding over the indigo ocean, a small flock of seagulls squawked to one another, and succeded in awakening the young Quileute man from his odder-than-odd, blissful dreaming. Eyes, with deep tones of magnificent, forest-brown, blinked open, and then absorbed the beginnings of the morning light, barely able to register the images surrounding him—save the most astonishingly amazing woman in the universe lying next to him.

The corners of Jacob's mouth twitched into a lazy smile, realizing how wonderful the early hours of dawn could prove to be.

_Renesmee, Nessie. My Nessie_. . . Jacob thought to himself, the essence of his soul struggling to maintain calm.

He felt like a little boy on Christmas morning, waking up far too early from the wonderful anticipation constantly building in his stomach—giddy and impatient from what was to become of the day. His heart was brimming with extreme celebration, the kind of happiness that makes you want to fall to your knees and cry.

She was the most beautiful creature—an obvious fact he had, however, known for quite some time already.

Her coppery tendrils of lush hair covered the ground, pillowing up from underneath her snowy-white cheek; her skin glowed in the warmth of the rising sun like backlit alabaster, appearing fresh and new as she smiled to herself in her sleep, and rightly put the morning's beauty to a hideous shame; her mouth hung slightly open, barely audible, very gentle breaths escaping through. Jacob listened to Nessie—to the rush of her tiny breathing, to the racing rhythm of her magical heartbeats, to the rustle of her hair.

Although, he noticed a peculiarity in the distance of their sleeping positions.

His gaze shifted down, glancing at Nessie's hand. Her hand laid flat over the ground as it seemed to be reaching out for him—stretching out to grab him in desperation, thoug Nessie was almost there. Despite their close proximity, she still couldn't quite touch him. If her arm was just a centimeter longer, she could accomplish her dreamt goal; but when Jacob realized this, he saw that his own arm was mirroring her actions, his fingers wide and splayed over the dusty floor.

Weird.

His fingers yearned for the texture of Nessie's moon-like, silken skin. Jacob's body missed her like crazy—his soul aching painfully for just one touch—even though she was right there—right there in front of him. It was criminal to need someone this much, and yet, Jacob could feel the anguish in his fingertips to simply nestle between each of Nessie's knuckles. That would make him happier, but Jacob resisted. He didn't want to wake her up too soon.

Jacob contemplated Nessie's story, seeing her as Myriah. Was he supposed to then be Artemis? After all, the way the couple laid now reflected the stars in an uncanny manner. The way they were both reaching out to one another reminded him of Artemis and Myriah's tragic tale, when they were so close to being together—almost—until fate intervened. Now, Myriah and Artemis were doomed to spend eternity mere inches apart.

Why. . .

So, why did he and Nessie lay like two unfortunate lovers?

Then, he scooted just a little bit closer to her.

The night was still busy fading from the sky, perishing into a grand memory of an absolutely wonderful yesterday.

An airy exhale escaped through Renesmee's lips. "My Jacob. . ."

He grinned gently, trailing his middle finger over a loose strand of Nessie's hair and tucked it behind the shell of her ear. She must have sensed Jacob's light, teasing touch, reaching her arm out a centimeter further to him. Finally, her fingers made contact with the blazing heat of his russet skin. Jacob watched Renesmee longer, his eyes wandering along the valley between her breasts, and counted each agile breath.

When the sun became a mere half-sphere over the La Push shoreline, Jacob arose readily from the ground. He grabbed his jacket off the ground, whipping it in the wind as though he was expecting a giant bull to pass by, and then dusted it off before blanketing it over Nessie, tucking it underneath her sides.

Then, Jacob grabbed his mussed up dress pants, slipping in one leg after the other—unfortunately for him, though, there wasn't much to hold up his pants, since his belt hadn't seemed to survive the night before, thanks to Nessie. There were plenty of forests around First Beach, some clothes must have been laying around somewhere. Jacob glanced at Nessie's slumbering form, and a strange hold on his heart kept him lingering, kept him from roaming away—a grip, clutching and choking it, frightened to leave her.

_Fuck it_, he decided.

He would rather be caught with his pants down than have Renesmee ever wake up alone.

And so, Jacob sat on the edge of the cliff. The sky went from pink, to tangerine, and finally to its familiar azure. The sun. . . It almost seemed to be brand new, the flaxen light shedding over the glimmering waters; it almost seemed like a brand new sky, the blueness and the marsmellowy white clouds merging together, and then separating again; and it almost seemed like a brand new world, full of wonderful splendor and miraculous magic.

Everything was alit in bright colors—the green trees greener, the blue sky bluer, the yellow sun yellower, and his truth was truer than it ever had been. The world was a much better, much happier place.

"Jacob," the girl-woman murmured, shifting around in his jacket. "Jacob. . ." she yawned, the tone of her voice sounding slightly off. "Jacob?"

He turned around, flattered by her sudden worry and he smiled. Jacob finally arose from the floor, carefully adjusting his pants before announcing his presence.

"Jacob!" Renesmee beckoned, sitting up. "Jacob, where are you?"

"Over here, Nessie," the shape-shifter called back.

"O-oh. . ." Renesmee stammered nervously, unable to meet his gaze. "I thought. . ."

Rolling her eyes at herself, Nessie began fiddling with a loose thread from Jacob's black jacket, hugging the fabric close to her chest. Her milk chocolate irises glazed over, a dwarfish tear slipped passed her cherry-flushed cheek. Jacob again adjusted his pants, rushing over to the half-vampire half-human woman's side when he saw her beautiful eyes glistening like a river in the moonlight. Nessie pursed her lips together in uncertainty, curling a long, index finger through her autumns locks, and pouted slightly.

"Hey, hey, hey," Jacob uttered, gently taking her small wrists into his large hands. "Don't cry. I'm here. I'm sorry. I just didn't want to disturb you while you were sleeping." He traced a thumb over the apple of her cheek, and dried Nessie's tears. "You just looked so peaceful. Jeez, I'm an idiot. I'm so sorry, Nessie."

"No, no," Nessie muttered lightly, coughing out a small, shy giggle, and affectionately shook her heart at him. "It's not that. I woke up and you weren't there," she said, and smiled. "I thought it was just a dream—the best dream I would know how to have, but my heart couldn't bare it if that's all it was, Jacob."

The man-wolf grinned ear-to-ear, his dimples imprinted on either side of his face. "I know, baby," he whispered, running his lips over Renesmee's forehead. "I thought the same thing." But fate had been in his fortune, and everything between them right now was real.

"Last night was incredible, Jacob," Nessie nodded, droplets of sweet bliss sprinkling from her eyelashes and onto the ground. "You were so patient and so kind with me. I felt like I was on top of the world. I still feel like I'm on top of the world."

God, Jacob loved her.

"Yeah," Jacob agreed whole-heartedly. "Making love with you has to make my list of the Top Best Moments Ever."

Nessie beamed at Jacob, her nether lip embedded between her pearly teeth. "Jacob, I have never felt this happy in my entire life. Being with you is right."

"I love you, Nessie," Jacob smiled softly, entraced by the sublte movement of the half-breed's deliciously shell-pink lips. "I'm in love with you."

She smirked, the edges of her mouth tied tight with emotion, and pecked a kiss on Jacob's cheek. Her white-lily fingers swept swiftly through his silky, black locks. "I love you, too—with everything that I have. Jake, this is it. You and me really have something here that's once in a lifetime, don't we?" she inquired rhetorically, nodding to herself as though the answer was apparent. "This is true love. I truly love you, Jacob. Only you."

What was this feeling? It couldn't be simply happiness. No, this had to more—much more. Soon, his heart would leap rigt out from his chest and snuggly into Nessie's warm hands for her to play with, when she wouldn't. Jacob's heart was eternally hers now and he would never want it back, knowing where he belonged. Jacob loved Nessie and would no other woman; she was the one. His forever. . .

Forever. Neither of them were completely mortal. They literally had forever to be together.

"If you're asking me to marry you," Jacob joked lightly, "I'm gonna need a ring."

A marriage with Nessie was actually a spectacular idea.

"Yeah, right," Nessie snorted, playfully rolling her eyes.

"You know, Nessie," Jacob started, his curious dark chocolate irises roaming around the ivory inches of her body, "I didn't ever really think this would happen for us." Sex with a vampire, even a part-vampire? Insane, right? "I didn't ever really think this would happen for me," he amended, laughing to himself. "I really that that love had skipped over me entirely." A black eyebrow arched in mock confusion. "Why did you pick me?"

"Are you kidding me?" the hybrid laughed, the sound like a tinker of bells. "You're easy to love," Renesmee replied sweetly. "Why did you choose me? You hated me, and now," she shrugged, realizing the irony of the situation, "we're lovers."

Jacob shook his head, chortling. "But I didn't choose you, Nessie. Don't be crazy." He ruffled the tendrils of her hair. "I would never deliberately choose to love a Cullen."

"Oh, gee. Thanks," Nessie mumbled sarcastically.

"Let me finish," Jacob told the half-human half-vampire girl, cupping the apple of her cheek in the palm of his hand. "But no matter how crazy it sounds, I do need you. Despite how stupid I am, you make me smarter. Nessie, I am becoming the man I want to be."

"Jacob," Nessie sighed in a state of beatitude, pressing their foreheards together, "you're supposed to go back to Seattle today."

"What, you got what you needed from me and now you can't wait to get rid of me?" Jacob questioned with a light-hearted chortle, and scoffed in feigned offense. He had almost forgotten that he hadn't told Nessie about his decision.

Nessie pursed her lips, shaking her head as she slipped her arms through Jacob's jacket, and swallowed back a knot of apprehension. "No, never. But. . ." she laughed to herself, ". . . do you want to go back home, Jacob?"

Seattle wasn't his home.

"I am home, Nessie."

"You know what I mean."

"I'm not sure that I do."

"Jake. . ."

"Nessie. . ."

"Are you really going to make me ask?"

"I really am."

"Jacob-"

"C'mon, Nessie. You know that you can ask me anything, even this."

"Do you. . .do you want to go back to Seattle?"

Jacob's face contorted in thought. What did he really have to go back to in Seattle? Did any of it even really matter if Nessie wasn't there? "Not really," the shape-shifter retorted, "but I would go back if you needed me to." Or even if she just wanted him out of her life, he would heed her orders, pack his bags without question, and go. Because he loved her. "I finally know that I belong with you."

"Good," the hybrid smiled cheekily, and stood up with Jacob, "because I want you to stay here. Stay with me forever, Jacob."

A request Jacob would happily grant. He would stay with Nessie for much longer than that—than forever.

"I'll never go anywhere else," Jacob assured his girlfriend, his forest-brown irises locked with her milk chocolate ones.

"Promise me," Nessie commanded, and then added sweetly, "please?"

"I swear to you, Nessie," Jacob vowed affectionately, and leaned into kiss her forehead, opening his arms to hug her.

Holding his Nessie like this—so close, so tight—felt unbelievably right, as thought Jacob was born for moments exactly like this. Jacob felt a curious warmth racing through his veins, that knurled in his stomach. It was that kind of comfortable warmth that made every bone in one's body release and relax—like lying down in a freshly drawn bathwater, or stepping into yellow sunlight on a cold, winter morning. Yeah.

Nessie's armed reached around Jacob's lower torso, resting her head over his drumming heart, and held him in return. She 'hmm'ed, curling his lips in a smile against his bare, copper cest. Subsequently, Jacob clinged on to Renesmee just a little bit tighter, positioning his chin atop Nessie's head.

Seattle? Yeah, right. Nobody was there to offer Jacob what Nessie could. This was where he wanted to be, and this is where he could therefore remain.

"Always?" Nessie queried.

Jacob nodded. "Always."

"And not just because of Faethra?"

"Nessie, listen to to me," the Quileute pack leader bidded, resting his hands on her shoulders, and looked her dead in the eyes. "I love you," he added, raking his russet findgers through the aurburn tresses of her hair. "I would follow you to hell and back. Faethra has nothing to do with it. You found me when I gave up all hope, and then you gave it right back to me. You believed in me. You're the one I want to be with. Wherever you go, I'll go," Jacob proclaimed, overjoyed and overwhelmed and over-his-head in love. "I'm staying here, because I'm done being alone. Why would I ruin the best thing in my life by running away from it?"

He was ready to be happy. Again.

"That's a good point," Renesmee agreed, nodding her head. "How can I argue with that?"

"You really can't. Would you mind if I stay with you forever, Nessie?" Jacob questioned, ghosting his lips over both of her hands.

"Not at all, Jacob," Nessie replied, shaking her head to and fro. She smiled in her warm way, and he fought with himself not to propose in that very second.

"I love you, too," Jacob stated, laying kisses all over Nessie's face.

"We should get going."

"No," Jacob exhaled, releasing Renesmee to look out passed their cliff. "You were right. We are safe up here. Let's just stay up here," he suggested as Nessie stood by his side. "We don't have to deal with the world yet."

"Hmmm," Nessie beamed, tapping her chin in mock consideration. "There is an idea with merit."

Her hand set on his forearm, glidig down his hot skin, and her fingers slipped between his. She held on tight to Jacob, making his temperature climb from one hundred eight degrees to at least a thousand degrees.

Together, they observed the cerulean ocean and azure sky, the sun's golden light sparkling over the vast water. Nessie snuggled her body into Jacob's welcoming embrace, humming a song he couldn't quite put a name to. If they hadn't done this a million times, he was certain they would do this a million times more in the future—hold one another over the edge and watch the night renew into day. They could be happy like this forever, never changing—always young and in. . . in love.

Jacob grinned against the back of Nessie's neck, whispering a plethora of 'I love you's. His entire being was alit in bliss.

Nessie and Jacob spoke of everything, talking about what would become of their future.

Perhaps in ten years, Nessie would be Jacob's wife, the two sharing just the beginning of a wonderful marriage that would put Edward and Bella's to shame, and maybe live somewhere on La Push. Of course, they would have their fair share of arguments over the years—over how late Jacob stayed out patroling with the wolf pack, over miniscule things such as where they should place the television or what color they should paint the house—but in the end, Jacob and Nessie would never go to bed with harsh behavior and poor attitudes.

Yes, Jacob and Nessie Black. . . They would create a utopia out of their lives together.

When late afternoon rolled around, the young lovebirds returned to Chief Swan's house. It had probed to be a peaceful morning, mainly because their time was spent together. The hours soared by like nothing at all—meaningful, yet merely momentary. All good things come to an end, but Jacob felt grace floating through the air—brewing a potion of unadulterated ecstacy.

With a morning so absolutely perfect, certain each moment after would get better. That was the goal and so far it had been achieved.

"Do you think Charlie has left for work yet?" Jacob questioned, unlocking the front door.

He cast a quick glance to Renesmee, clad only in his jacket, though he did offer her a pair of Leah's clothes that had been lying around the woods. Ultimately, he cherished the fact that she had kindly declined—the sight of the loose fit of the clothing on her body—her slender stomach exposed only to him, the navel an enticing shape, as the black jacket rested over her breast, with her milky legs completely bare.

"I believe so. I can't smell him," Nessie observed aloud, walking through the door.

"Phew!" Jaco uttered in feigned relief.

Nessie rolled her eyes. "Lucky us."

"And we're all alone," he murmured huskily, taking her into his arms.

"Yes, we are."

"And I love you."

"I love that you love saying that you love me."

"I can't stop saying it. I won't stop saying it," Jacob exclaimed joyously, grinning an impossible grin—the ridiculous one Jacob thought was never meant for him. "I've been waiting too long to tell you."

She nibbled on her bottom lip, pecking a kiss on his mouth. "I know. Me, too. I love you, Jacob," she replied in much content. "And as much as I want to continue last night's celebration of words a long time coming. . ." Renesmee shrugged out of his embrace, "I really need to take a shower first and get into some real clothes."

"Clothes," Jacob jokingly scoffed. "What's the point? I'm just going to make sure all of your clothes are rags later."

"Oh?" Nessie arched an inquisitive eyebrow, pulling Jacob to her—brushing her top lip just over Jacob's nether one in a delicate kiss, teasing him. She released him, and then laughed. "Let's not give Aunt Alice an excuse to shop."

"Tease," Jacob growled.

"But you love me."

"I do?"

"Yes."

"Yeah, well. You love me, too."

"Forever," she vowed.

"Mhmm, okay," Jacob chuckled gently and playfully patted Nessie's backside. "You better go before I refuse to let you out of my arms."

"Mmkay," Nessie giggled, her cheeks flushing cerise. "I'll see you in a few minutes."

She turned around, walking away slowly and allowed her hips to swing from side to side. Naturally, Jacob watched her with great attention, studiously mesmerized by the hyptonic sway. Jacob nodded to himself, as she disappeared into another room. All of this seemed too weird, like it wasn't even his own reality.

He wandered over to the kitchen, grabbing a soda from the refrigerator, and took a small swig. His stomach was full already—of pure wonder—so he wasn't very hungry—something new for him. Yeah, Jacob was in a pretty good mood. Nothing could bring him down from this high, not even Faethra or the rest of the world.

Until the phone rang, loud and clear and obnoxious.

A bad vibe resonated from its constant ringing, dread freezing Jacob in his place. Something in the pit of his stomach reasoned with him not to pick it up—a cold, terrle fear sank into his body. Still, despite every ounce of sanity telling him no, he went into the living room.

Jacob's hand wrapped around the body of the phone, and saw 'CULLEN' blinking across the orange screen. Maybe he was acting silly, only an irrational feeling that he could supress for Nessie's sake. It was probably one of her family members trying to check in to see if she was all right.

Jacob answered it. "Swan residence. Man of the Year Speaking."

"_Hey_," came Bella's voice, sounding somewhat confused. "_Jacob_?"

"Oh." That explained a lot. "Hey, Bells," Jacob greeted in a faux chipper disposition. "What's going on?"

"_Is Renesmee there_?" she questioned in a sullen tone.

"She went to take a shower," he replied matter-of-factually, flopping down on Charlie's couch.

"_Okay_. . ." By the sound of her voice, Bella didn't seemed to be too satisfied. It elicited an aching concern, an old habit that he had developed back when she was still his best friend—a part of him wanting to soothe her pain away and get to the bottom of what was bothering her. Be there for her. But Bella and Jacob were far from friendship, at odds with wanting Nessie's undivided attention.

Somehow, though, that didn't stop Jacob from asking, "Are you okay? Is something wrong? Is this about the golden hind?" But he didn't care to know about an inch of truth.

"_No_," Bella answered immediately. Jacob was almost relieved until she promptly added, "_Well, not exactly. I need to speak with you_."

"How come?" Jacob inquired suspiciously.

The last time something like this happened, Faethra almost got away with murdering Nessie. He couldn't be sure that this wasn't another one of her cruel tricks.

"_I just do_," Bella replied shortly.

The shape-shifter exhaled in frustration. "Then, I can't go anywhere with you." Surely, Bella have known that he wouldn't leave Nessie without the best reason to go. Maybe she was testing him.

"_Please, Jacob_? _This is really important_," Bella said, and he could practically hear her pacing.

"Anything you say to me, you can say in front of Nessie," Jacob retorted.

"_No, I really can't. Only you are allowed to know_," Bella insisted, an audible huff emination from the phone's speaker. "_Please. . . Come without Nessie. Trust me when I tell you that she's better off not knowing. I need to see you in private. Just you._"

"You're plotting to kill me, aren't you?"

"_Jacob_. . ."

"How hard is it to tell me what the hell is happening, Bella?"

"_Don't ask me anymore questions. I'll explain everything I can later_," the vampire female elaborated annoyedly, speaking a mile a minute. "_Just meet me as soon as you can. Meet me at the abandoned Cullen mansion in the woods. Don't tell Nessie where you're going. I need you to trust me on this, Jacob. You would want to know this_."

Actually, he doubted that. "But-"

"_See you later_."

With a simple click of a button, Bella was gone. Jacob wished he had listened to his gut feelings earlier and just ignore the stupid, friggin' phone. It occurred to him that he didn't have to go—he didn't really want to and his curiosity wasn't so great that it made leaving Nessie behind seem worth it—but the sheer plea in Bella's voice told him that he needed to. So, he got out a piece of paper, a pen, and attached a note to the refrigerator:

_**Went to step out for a bit. I'll be back in soon. Don't go anywhere. I love you. -Jacob**_

_And the arms of the ocean_

_So sweet and so cold_

_And all of this devotion_

_I never knew at all_

_In the crushes of heaven_

_For a sinner released_

_But the arms of the ocean_

_Delivered me_

_Never let me go_

_Never let me go_


	44. The One that Got Away

**Disclaimer: Nothing belongs to me, you know. Same old, same old. Also, a large portion from the imprint scene is Stephenie Meyer's work from the book. I just continued the scene. And this cover song is by the ever-talented Boyce Avenue!**

**Author's Note: After seeing Breaking Dawn Part Two, I decided that I'm probably not going to be following a lot of the same dialogue. I enjoyed the film. It was pretty much everything I anticipated, and Mackenzie Foy was soooooo unbelievably adorable as Nessie, but the were some moments that were definitely better written in the book. So, I'm sticking with that. With that said, R&R, gals!**

_In another life_

_You would be my girl_

_We'd keep all our promises_

_Be us against the world_

Approximately two hours later, choosing to take a run in his wolf form, Jacob arrived in the area the where the Cullens used to live. Although he had only been there only a few days prior with Renesmee, he had never really taken a good look around. Truth be told, it looked like any old forest in the Washington state, but this one was somehow special—or it should have been. It was incredible how Nessie, as a tiny girl, once played out here—climbed up every tree, hid in each bush, and swung around from branch to branch.

He could almost picture all of it—picture _her_.

The trees were the same, the grass was the same, everything about these woods was the exact same as it had been last time—except for the feeling—sort of welcoming and familiar. It had been a home to someone once, to a certain little half-vampire half-human girl, while he was miles and miles away hating his life.

But it was a little unfair that Leah was the one to imprint on Nessie, Leah was her protector, her best friend; they were sisters by soul, but the connection he shared with Nessie went much deeper, right? No. He knew that. They didn't have a love that was regular, mortal, or any every day, ordinary bond that could be found in a store. It wasn't a lie; he loved her deeper and purer all on his own. Nessie was his soul mate. Jacob knew that, because a life without her seemed. . . impossible to live. That's how it had been since the moment they met.

She found him.

Jacob found a pair of clothes, and put them on. Bella had been standing in front of the former Cullen mansion, now standing there in ruins, with a saddened posture—arms crossed, shoulders hunched, knees bent. And he went to her, albeit in a fit of hesitance.

What did Bella have to tell him that could be so important? Was it anything he wanted, or even needed, to hear?

Bella looked up at him, managing a tight smile for Jacob, and waved. "Jacob. . ." Her voice didn't sound right, and he knew right away that it was bad news. Well, crap. "Hi."

"Hey," Jacob said uncomfortably, not bothering with a fake smile.

"I didn't think you would actually come," Bella commented casually.

The Quileute shrugged nonchalantly, shoving his hands into his pockets. "Neither did I, but something must have gotten me to. You know something that the rest of us don't."

"You. . ." the vampire slightly gasped, and shook her head in perplexity. "That look in your eyes. . . You look happy, the happiest you've been in a long time."

"I am," Jacob confirmed, nodding and immediately thought of his night with Nessie. "Really happy."

"You're not leaving. I mean, you're not leaving her," Bella stated, exhaling inaudibly. "Are you?"

"Not a chance," Jacob grinned, cocking an eyebrow and dared her to challenged him—to make him leave, because he would never.

"I was afraid of that," she huffed, tugging at the roots of her hair.

"Why?" Jacob inquired, confused. "Bella, I'm in love with her."

"I know that, Jacob. I'm not blind, but you definitely were," Bella replied, all but chomping down on her bottom lip.

"What is that supposed to mean?" he asked, partially insulted.

"Nothing," Bella retorted, rolling her eyes. She knitted her eyebrows together, and began tapping her foot. "This was a bad idea. I have no clue what I'm supposed to be doing."

Jacob folded his arms over his chest. His suspicion was right. "You do know something," he stated evenly, stepping closer. "Come on, Bella. Talk to me."

"I love Renesmee, too, Jacob," Bella whispered in a raspy tone, trying to find a proper volume to speak in. "She might never know how much. Nobody will. Nobody but you."

"Stop speaking in riddles or I'm leaving," Jacob threatened, shaking his head. He didn't have time for this nonsense. Faethra could be anywhere.

"Because you need to," Bella started, her marble expression contorted and strained. "Because you miss seeing her face, right?" she queried knowingly, almost in disapproveal. Jacob glowered at her, his dark chocolate irises blackening to coal. "It's an irrational feeling, but all you know is that being with her is the only thing that makes you feel whole again."

"And I thought your hubby was the annoying mindreader," Jacob snarled, a suppressed instinct knawing at the surface, and told him to listen to Bella.

"What's the rest of the world like when you're apart from Renesmee?" Bella questioned in earnest.

He took a moment to answer, and glanced around. "It's kind of a blur. Everything barely exists."

"You're kind of like a blind man without the sun. Without her," she responded, correctly labeling Jacob's attachment to her daughter. "Jacob, believe it or not, I've seen that look on your face before—a thousand times."

"What. . . ?"

"Renesmee is your imprint."

"I love Nessie," Jacob replied, furrowing a brow. "I'll do anything for her, but I didn't imprint on her." Not that it didn't sound great, but he preferred getting to know her in his own way. She wasn't his imprint, but she was his exact soul mate.

"There is no other girl in this world that is right for you like my daughter is," Bella pointed out, locking one knee into place. "You could search from every end, but you will never find anyone else."

"Blatantly," Jacob retorted with a low growl. He didn't want anyone else; he couldn't picture himself falling in love in with anyone else. "But nothing happened at first sight." If anything did, maybe he wouldn't have been so dreadful to her. "Gravity didn't move and I didn't imprint."

"Yes, you did."

"No."

"Yes!" Bella shouted, her voice echoing through the thick leaves of the trees as the sparrows flocked to safety, and then, she stomped her foot against the ground in frustration. "There was an inexplicable bond that forged our friendship, Jacob—your paths—because you two were meant to be together from the very beginning." She was pleading with him, but Jaob couldn't be convinced. "No matter what we do, no matter how much you deny it, there has to be something in you that held on to the memories."

"What am I supposed to remember?" Jacob questioned, rolling his eyes. His jaw tensed and shook his head.

"The mark you left on her—the mark she left on you!" she exclaimed as thought it was an obvious fact. "Come on, Jacob. I know that there is a part of you that is aware of how familiar this situation is."

Jacob grimaced in annoyance. "I don't know what you're talking about."

Except Jacob might have a hunch at least. He could lie to Bella, but he couldn't lie to himself—he knew what she was talking about, that constant sense of deja vu invading his thoughts. Memories or visions or merely dreams of another reality where he and Nessie ended up together, but he didn't really believe in them, the dreams. They all served a reminders for him, of the life he wanted with Nessie—the life he would struggle, fight, and bleed to have. However, none of it could be part of a past reality; it was absolutely impossible.

Or at least that's what Jacob told himself. Nothing meant anything, without Nessie.

But if there was something to remember. . .what would it prove?

"I think you do, Jacob," Bella replied matter-of-factually, sticking either thumb through the loops of her bluejeans. "I think you're afraid to let yourself remember, because we both know what you'll do next. That's why I'm telling you. You have to do it." She swallowed a lump of fright, her mouth pulled into a tight frown. "It's the only way for Renesmee to survive."

"Okay, you know what? You're out of your mind," Jacob nodded, sliding his foot back to turn around. He had enough of this discussion, foolish as it was.

With her too-quick vampire speed, she suddenly appeared in front of him. "Think about it, Jake. Why did you fall in love with her so fast?"

"So, what if I did imprint on Nessie?" the shape-shifter snapped vicously. "What does that mean?"

"That you'll always protect her. . . That you'll do anything to protect her. Something in you does, in fact, recall what you two mean to each other. Renesmee will die if you don't fully realize it," Bella begged, trapping Jacob's hot wrists in her icy hands.

"Either save it for the movie or don't be so damn overdramatic," Jacob huffed commandingly, gritting his teeth.

Truthfully, he was getting too fed up with Bella's antics; he was far too old and far too over her to deal with it. What was this anyway? Yet another futile attempt to keep him from being happy? Or was Bella aiming to control Nessie like a puppet, just like everyone else was? Well, Jacob refused to fall victim to Bella's apparent deceit. He wanted Nessie; he needed Nessie; he was going to be with Nessie, and Bella was just going to have to find a way to come to terms with that.

"Stop pretending you have no clue what I'm talking about!" Bella yelled, baring her teeth at him. "I know you do! Why can't you stay away from her? Why can the golden hind see into her mind? That never happened before."

"Before?" he inquired in a murmur.

"Yes," the vampire woman confirmed, calming down. "Before—when we lost Renesmee, when you made a deal to bring her back. She was your best friend and your wife. A love like that is not something you can erase."

"My wife?" Jacob repeated increduously, his left brow twitching. "That's really some story, Bells."

"It's not," Bella reasoned in desperation. "Jacob, I was there. I watched Renesmee grow up with you. I watched her fall in love with you. I watched you two get married!"

"Stop it! Stop lying!"

"No!" Bella bellowed, trembling with cold ire. Her golden brown irises darkened to a black fire, inflamed and brimming like smoke. "You're lying to yourself, because you know that you'll have no other choice. You loved Nessie then like you do now. . . You loved her in so many ways. I saw that as well. Jacob, you were her protector. She always felt safe when you were around." She shrugged, forcing an awkward laugh. "Remember when she was a little girl?" Not yet. "Nessie couldn't get enough of you. She loved hunting with you."

"I never knew her 're thinking of Leah," Jacob sighed bored, though his stoned stature was gradually cracking.

"No, I'm not. This isn't a trick," Bella spoke slowly, and paused for a second. "Leah has never taken your place in Nessie's heart. Nobody could ever come close, not in any reality."

"Why are you doing this?" Jacob asked breathlessly, an invisible hand squeezing at his stomach. No, no, no. He couldn't do this to himself."

"Because I love my daughter," Bella answered without even a nanosecond to pass the pair of them by, her solemn tone shaking nervously and angrily. "I need her to live. You need to be far, far way in order to ensure that. Faethra is after you, and she will destroy what you love most. It's clear to everyone that Nessie is just that to you." she gently reminded me, and inhaled the autumn air. "By leaving Nessie behind, Faethra will think that Nessie doesn't mean a thing to you and her attacks will stop."

"I am not leaving Nessie," Jacob growled assertively. "We'll find another way to stop Faethra."

"But you won't. You're wrong, Jacob. And then what?" Bella inquired, shaking her head from side to side in exasperation, and then dipped her hand deep in her pocket. "We lose Nessie all over again. I can't do that. Not again."

"I'll protect her," he stated.

"You said that before, too, Jacob," Bella retorted with a thin smile, and started staring at an object laying in the palm of her hand, "which amounted to nothing, but a broken promise."

"But I love her. . ." His life wouldn't even exist without Nessie. Bella shouldn't be asking him to remember something that never happened—to imagine a time when Nessie wasn't around—and would never happen. Jacob wouldn't allow it. "No!" he roared ferociously, louder than any lion. "You don't know what you're talking about. I'm gonna get outta here." Jacob turned around, needing to just get away. He couldn't be here anymore; he needed to be close to Nessie.

"Jacob, wait!" Bella screamed. Jacob stopped dead in his tracks, facing her yet again. She tossed an article of jewelry at him, which he promptly caught in both hands. Suddenly, he was afraid. What was it? Did he really want to know? "Look at it, Jacob. Just look," she ordered, and he heeded her command—lifting his fingers slowly. "You recognize, don't you?"

The shape-shifter gazed down at the object, too familiar and too bizarre in its creation, exactly like Nessie. It was woven and tied with different colored leather strands—similar to early autumn, when it began in September. There was a brown, a heart-warming rich shade of fantastic milk chocolate, and it made him think of Nessie's beautiful eyes. There was a dark, deep red—copper, really, like his Nessie's hair shining in the golden rays of the bright sun. There was green, indentical to the emeraldish-grass hint in the flecks in her orbs. But it there wasn't an exact likeness to Nessie's bracelet; it was missing the charms Jacob gave her in the later years—the snowflake and the baby fox.

"What is it, Jacob?"

"Our. . . our promise."

* * *

><p><em>Perfect. The new position was perfect for Jacob's strike. He leaned forward and felt the heat begin to change him while the pull toward the killer grew—it was stronger than he'd ever felt before, so strong that it reminded him of an Alpha's command, like it would crush Jacob if he didn't obey.<em>

_This time, Jacob wanted to obey._

_The murderer stared past Rosalie's shoulder at him, its gaze more focused than any newborn creature's should be. _

_Warm brown eyes, the color of milk chocolate—the exact same color Bella's had been._

_His shaking jerked to a stop, heat flooded through him, stronger than before, but it was a new kind of heat—not a burning._

_It was a glowing._

_Everything inside of Jacob came undone as stared at the tiny porcelain face of the half-vampire, half-human baby. All the lines that held Jacob to his life were sliced apart in swift cuts, like clipping the strings to a bunch of balloons. Everything that made Jacob who he was—his love for the dead girl upstairs, his love for his father, his loyalty to his new pack, the love for his other brothers, his hatred for his enemies, his home, his name, his self—disconnected from him in that second—_snip, snip, snip_—and floated up into space. _

_Jacob was never left drifting. A new string held him where he was._

_Not one string, but a million. Not strings, but steel cables. A million steel cables all tying him to one thing—to the very center of the universe._

_He could see that now—how the universe swirled around this one point. He'd never seen the symmetry of the universe before, but now it was plain._

_The gravity of the earth no longer tied him to the place where he stood._

_Where he had only stood for a second just before he saw what he had been missing out on all his of life—soaring through the fall, creamy color of her eyes. Jacob went to his knees, never having experienced this white-hot intensity. It was both strengthening and weakening all at the same time, forcing his weight on his legs. How could anyone stand at a time like this? Every fiber of his being tremored violently, the rest of the world stood still, pushing him down—no longer to take a step forward, nor to take two steps backward, but to simply stay. _

_During the fall, his own dark chocolate eyes searched through the newborn's for tranquility, and was successful. Cutting through the blackened forest and flying straight into the sunny irises, Jacob found the girl—the child, the teenager, and the woman—standing amongst a field, the daylight soaked in her pearl pores as a poised smile buttered the corners of her mouth. She had been with him all along—in his struggles as human and wolf, holding his hand when the pain was like a bag of bricks on his shoulders—always within Bella, causing him to wait, wait for something he consciously could not fathom. _

_Jacob had been a blind man, down on himself when all he wanted was Bella to love him back—why couldn't he just find love? But _she_ always been there, so close that he never noticed until today. Love found him. His eyes were open._

_And now, she was here. _

_Finally, everything made sense. The long, narrow, and dark road Jacob had been traveling down, the faceless signs had led him to this very moment—where never ended and forever began. For a change, there was a reason for him to stay in place._

_It was the baby girl in the blonde vampire's arms that held him here now. . ._

"_Renesmee. . ." The name of purpose, of Bella's newborn daughter, of his imprint._

_The two stared at one another for an eternal instant, brown eyes upon brown eyes. Her face was made of porcelain flesh, her cheeks anwed with a rose petal blush, and her hair like bronze-auburn similar to her father's, yet nothing captivated him more than the familiar milk chocolate color of Renesmee's flawless orbs._

_Goldie Locks quickly turned around in the next second and clutched the infant tighter to her shoulder like a mother lion protecting her cub, shielding her from Jacob—blinding him the sun. _

"_Get away from us, you flea-bitten dog," she growled, tucking Renesmee further in her white blanket. "If you seriously think I'm going to allow you to harm a hair on her head, you have another thing coming."_

_Jacob struggled not to emit a low snarl, to not demand the vampire release Renesmee immediately, but he hushed it for the fear of scaring the child. The feral beast within wouldn't win. _

"_N-No," he stammered shortly, his fingers twitching nervously. "That's not what I want," he said, rising from the floor._

"_Believe it or not, I wasn't born yesterday," Rosalie replied with a fowl glower, her gaze like hellfire on his face. "Step away, mongrel, or I promise that I will tear your heart out," she threatened, her top lip curving upward in warning. _

"_Wait a minute, Blondie," Jacob uttered in desperation, raising his hands in surrender. "It's not like that. I just want to see her. . . Please?"_

"_No way," the strigoi laughed ironically, and glanced at the bundle in her arms. For a split-second, she was calmed. And Jacob understood. She wanted to keep Renesmee safe, like any mother would want for their child. Like Bella. "Renesmee is only a baby. It's not her fault. You have to stop blaming her. I don't care what-"_

"_Stop," the shape-shifter pleaded, shaking his head. He couldn't bear the fantasy of ever being the cause of Renesmee's suffering—any type of pain. "We both want the same thing here. I would never hurt her. I promise she is safe with me."_

_And then it clicked in Rosalie's head. "Oh, no. Tell me you didn't."_

_Jacob clumsily staggered forward when the tiny bundle started struggling to turn around, trying to stretch her little elbows. "Let me see her. Just for a minute."_

"_You did!" Rosalie shouted in disgust, rocking the baby half-breed in her arms to soothe her, but it seemed to frustrate her all the more. "You did that creepy, dumb doggie mating thing—on my niece!" Protectively and possessively laying her cold fingers over Renesmee's forehead, she backed in outrage. "How dare you! Get out of here, mutt! Go! Nobody wants you in this house! You have no place here!" the flaxen-haired vampire yelled, but Renesmee whimpered in order to get her aunt's attention, and then reached out her small hand to rest on Rosalie's cheek. "Not even Bella. . . What?" Her honey-gold irises glazed over in an abrupt blankness as her mouth went agape in astonishment. _

"_What? What's wrong?" Jacob inquired, keeping his eyes glued to Renesmee._

_Rosalie emitted a gentle sigh, smiling in a motherly affection at the vanilla face of the half-human half-vampire baby girl. "Fine. Okay, sweetheart." She placed a soft kiss on Renesmee's forehead, adjusting her carefully to point her toward Jacob. "Here," she said flatly. "You do know how to properly hold a baby, don't you?"_

"_Duh."_

"_Don't cop an attitude with me, dog," Rosalie shot. "She may not be like an average baby, but you still have to be careful with her. Renesmee is still fragile, so don't you dare drop her."_

_Again, duh._

_Jacob rolled his eyes, but was rendered unable to wipe the idiotic, proud grin from his mouth as Rosalie released the five minute-old baby to him. "Would you chill out, Toehead? If you know about what werewolves can do, then already know she's safe with me. Trust me."_

"_When pigs fly."_

_He cradled the infant tenderly, numbly fixated upon the teeny-tiny, itty-bitty fair expression of the hybrid baby. Renesmee was most assuredly a pretty baby, incredulous while he held her safely in his arms. "Hey there, Renesmee," Jacob cooed awkwardly, grinning widely like a moron. "I'm Jacob. I won't hurt you, okay?" he swore, instinctively rocking Renesmee in his embrace. "I will never hurt you."_

_Renesmee reached her hand up and patted Jacob's arm, then replayed the image back to him—of Jacob's proud face staring down at her, his copper skin glowing in the firelight. "_Jacob_."_

"_That's right, honey," Jacob nodded in adoration, forcing himself not to gush. Already, the baby was so special and so clever. "I'm Jacob Black, and I promise that you're always safe when you're with me. Nobody is ever gonna harm you while I'm around."_

_She blinked in sadness, her rich brown orbs conveying concern. "_Hurt_?" Renesmee showed him a glimpse of his former self, only a few minutes ago, shouting angrily at the pale figure of her father, as snarled at Edward to 'throw it out a window.' Oh, no. "_Harm_? _Mad_?"_

_The poor thing thought. . . and maybe he was. . . but not anymore. Jacob readjusted Renesmee, shaking his head. "No, Renesmee. I'm not mad at you. Why would I be?"_

_Renesmee frowned, tears like crystal glass glistening down her rosy cheeks. A memory invaded his vision yet again—dark red everywhere with splotches of light shining through. A wave of fear crashed down over her unborn body, a fleshy object smothering each breath, and she panicked. In worry, the infant battled for freedom, only aware of the severe danger she put her human mother through once outside of the womb. "_Hurt Momma_."_

"_No," he retorted softly, kissing her forehead. "Don't cry." Anything but that. His heart couldn't take it, shattering in new places. He would rather Edward wring his neck. "I'm so sorry. I didn't understand you until now. It's not your fault. No matter what I've said, I love you." Of course he did. Jacob couldn't remember feeling more at ease. _

_Nodding tiredly, she yawned a perfect circle when her little eyes fluttered cloed. "Hggh, hmm."_

"_Good night," the shape-shifter murmured, awestruck with the way she mesmerized him by movements all too simple. "Sweet dreams." Jacob sighed, trying to let Renesmee go away to Rosalie. "Here, Blondie. I-" Just then, Renesmee quickly gripped her tiny fist around Jacob's shirt and insisted on staying put in his arms. He grinned, obliging. "Never mind. She's too content."_

"_Nuh-uh!" Rosalie whined, scrunching up her nose in agitation. "No way! You're not getting your dog stench all over the baby!"_

_He arched an eyebrow in amuse, but refused to ruin Renesmee's—what a hideous name, he'd have to come up with something else to call her later on—sleep. "Go away," Jacob shooed Blondie away. "She's dreaming."_

* * *

><p><em>The little girl, now taller and leaner in her latest growth spurt, leapt out of her mother's arms and hurriedly over to her best friend, who instinctively held his own open to catch her. "Jacob!"<em>

"_Nessie!" he exclaimed in return, picking her off the ground. "Don't you look mighty pretty today?"_

_Ducking her cherry pink cheeks behind the curtain of her hair, Nessie replied brightly, "Rosalie bought it for me. It's a Christmas present." She pursed her lips, and furrowed her eyebrows in an abrupt reminder: "Oh! Merry Christmas, Jacob!"_

_Jacob grinned, fulfilled with the warmth radioting from her shining smile. "Merry Christmas, Nessie! Are you enjoying your first Christmas?" Though, by looking at her, no would would ever believe it. Heck, it was hard for anyone to believe that Nessie wasn't even a year old yet. _

"_Yes, I am," she nodded, and started retrieving an object from her left pocket. "Santa Claus got me a lot of awesome presents! And look! Daddy gave me this music device!" Nessie beamed, proudly showing Jacob her new mp3 player probably filled with Edward's boring elevator music._

"_Cool!" He chuckled, letting the kid's drop to ground in one gentle, swift movement._

"_Yes, I love it," Nessie told him, looking up._

"_Yeah, but is there anything you don't love?"_

"_Spinach."_

"_Ya got me there."_

"_Ooh!" Nessie exclaimed, pulling out a piece of paper from the right pocket of her skirt. She unfolded it for Jacob and laid it in his rough palms. "Here you go, Jacob! I couldn't buy you anything, but I made something just for you."_

_It was a drawing of him, the wolf version, laying amongst the fall leaves. Autumn and russet marks streaked across Jacob's fluffy fur, with the word 'warm' scribbled on the side. His eyes were drawn big, colored in with black and brown, and made him look kind of adorable. Jacob chuckled to himself, realizing that he must have seemed like an overgrown puppy rather than an actual wolf. Truly, it was a wonderful present—partially he hadn't been expecting one from her—and well. . . It proved that she appreciated him in her life, when certainly there was a great many other people buying time for her attention. Not only her family members, but now some of the bloodsuckers._

"_Aw, Nessie. . . You really didn't have to," Jacob replied, feeling his heart melt._

"_Don't be silly. You're my best friend. Do you like it?" the hybrid questioned in a hopeful tone, shrugging adorably. _

"_Yes!" Jacob retorted jovially, and ruffled her auburn hair playfully. "I love it, Nessie. It's totally cool. You're so talented and sweet. Thank you. Which reminds me-"_

"_Come along, Renesmee," Edward interrupted gently, gesturing toward his daughter to join him and Bella. "We don't want you to catch a fever."_

"_I won't, Daddy," she promised, briefly glancing over her shoulder._

"_This will only take a second, Edward."_

"_Not now, Jacob."_

"_Edward, just let him," Bella told her husband, wearily patting his arm. The drama with the Volturi had gotten to the both of them, causing Bella and Edward to be a smidgen crankier than usual. _

_Edward shrugged off his jacket, and wrapped it around Nessie's little shoulders. "Take my coat, sweetheart. Your mother and I will be inside with your grandfather."_

"_Thank you, Daddy," Nessie replied appreciatively, slipping her arms inside of the jacket. Jacob almost laughed; it looked like it was eating her whole. _

_Jacob shook his head, and chortled to himself when Edward and Bella finally disappeared in Charlie's house. He dropped down to his knees, now eye-level with his angelic imprint. He slipped out a small gift from his pocket, and handed it to Nessie. _

"_Here ya go, Nessie. It's not fancy or anything, but I hope you like it." It was Renesmee's first Christmas; with everything that had been going on, Jacob wanted to show Nessie much she meant to him and he wouldn't be able to do that with a store-bought present._

_Nessie's eyes widened, beaming in excitement as she unwrapped the gift to reveal a handmade bracelet, a Quileute promise bracelet that would forever symbolize his devotion—the imprint that entwined their destinies. "It's the prettiest bracelet I've ever seen! Jacob, thank you!" she happily shouted, bouncing up and down giddily, and then gave Jacob a big hug. "You're the best!"_

"_Listen, Nessie, I want you to understand something important," Jacob began affectionately, as Nessie hooked the bracelet around her wrist. "You're my best friend. Nobody can compete with you. And this bracelet is a representation of how I am yours—my arms, my legs, my heart, whatever you want." That was his solemn vow to the little tyke, his imprint. He was hers, and his life was entirely focused on the intent of keeping her safe and happy. "Nobody is as special as you. Whenever you need me, you can always count on me to find you. I'm never too far away. Just call for me. No matter where I am, I'll hear you and I'll come running. We'll be friends for as long as you want. And as your friend, I will never let anything bad happen to you."_

. . . Amounted to nothing but a broken promise. . .

_The little girl nodded, and, as well, promised to protect Jacob from whatever dangers dared to test their friendship. "I'll always wear this bracelet to remember __our promise."_

_In another life_

_I would make you stay_

_So I don't have to say_

_You were the one that got away_

_The one that got away_


	45. By The Way

**Disclaimer: Nothing belongs to me. It never has. It never will. This song is one of my favorites by Hinder! Eep!**

**Author's Note: Sooooo, how's life? Did everyone enjoy their holidays? I promise that I will finish this story. It will not be abandoned. It is far too dear to me to suddenly forget all about it. I swear! There's plenty more of this story to come for those of you that choose to keep on reading it. Ya'll are the bestest ever. Anyway, here's the next chapter. It's a bit short, but I hope ya'll still enjoy it.**

**R&R, lovelies!**

_In the winding down hours_

_I let your heart down again_

_What did I do to make a scene so gory?_

_I'm no better than the ones before me_

_Old habits die hard_

_I always end up hating the end_

_What did I to make a scene so gory?_

_I'm no better than the ones before me_

_I'm in the middle of a break down _

_Watching you scream_

_In the middle of a break down_

_Screaming at me_

It was a cold day; although, Jacob had not realized it at first.

Feeling his legs tremble, vehemently, the frigid air rolled over the goosebumps of his russett flesh. A shiver, threatening to break the foundation of his bones, wracked throught his body, the temperature of his body dropping in turn. It hurt like hell. For a moment, his vision went cross—seeing spots, then red, and then nothing. It was the same feeling as standing up too quickly, yet he hadn't moved in minutes. Minutes.

Jacob stood still, that was all he could do.

He kept blinking down at the bracelet in his palms, completely and utterly astonished by the terribly familiar sight.

There it was—autumn laying right there in the palm of his hand, all of the wonderful colors that made him think of. . . of his imprint—reminded Jacob of Nessie. All he could do was stand and stare, and he stared for the longest time in deep contemplation, and was left drowning under a black ocean of too much memory.

His ears were in pain, a stinging ring piercing each beat of his eardrums. Jacob grunted, closing his eyes to keep from recollecting anything more, but that attempt went totally futile.

In the darkness of his vision, behind his eyelids, Jacob saw Nessie—the dandy, little girl swinging from tree branc to tree branch as they played outside of her parents' cottage, the preteen making sarcastic remarks with Jacob as Paul and Jared argued who would get the last slice of pizza, her contagious laughter spreading throughout the entire room, the young lady twirling about in her brand new skirt to flaunt her newly grown hips, and the woman that she quickly learned to be.

Ah, his Nessie.

The way she giggled at practically everything he said, swirling a delicate finger through a lush, coppery tendril. She was always brand new with youth, spunk, and spirit—their life flashing before Jacob's eyes.

But the memories did not draw to a close at their nearly blissful marriage. Oh, no. It went on—passed the days of dreadful heartache, passed the nights of waiting around to die, passed their one last kiss, and to a single word. A single word that had the power to shatter into a thousand more, Bella's voice splitting like glass as she cradled her dead daughter. Everything else he could remember as clear as day, but that last one.

It was like a nightmare, but. . .

But then, Jacob had awoken to a new life, and that life without Nessie was the real nightmare. Still, Nessie, right out of the blue, actually found him—where they promised that they would on their first date. Then, it all started becoming reality again. He wanted it—he wanted her. When Jacob held Nessie again, the world wasn't that bad. She made him happy, like she always used to; she always knew how to make him smile—that's why he belonged to her, that's why Jacob was so damn devoted to her.

And still, Jacob rememebered Nessie's beated, battered, broken, and bruised body, barely even looking like the woman he loved, but she was. That's all she was—pale and broken and left in the muck. Nessie was there—Jacob could see her clearly in Bella's arms, but somehow far away.

No, no.

Finally, Jacob's knees gave out, falling to the ground.

He fought to not let his entire body crumble on the forest floor, as he thumbed the leather strands of Renesmee's Christmas bracelet.

It was torn and tattered in places, probably from old age, or from the fight. Nessie was kept the trinket in perfect condition, wearing it proudly on her wrist every time they saw each other. Despite the fact that the bracelet really should have looked worse, Nessie somehow managed to keep it looking brand new, like the day he had given it to her, and cherished it as if it was the finest gold. And although, Nessie protected the Quileute bracelet with the utmost care, it appeared the way it did the last time he saw it.

When was the last time he saw the bracelet?

Jacob backtracked through the farthest reaches of his mind to recall. Yes, now he remembered. Jacob was at Renesmee's funeral, looking upon her lifeless, lightless form in her fancy marble casket. Alice had dressed her in an ivory summer dress and had polished her wedding ring, causing the band to shine like the sun. Even in death, Nessie was the beloved Cullen princess, but much paler than she had ever been before. But still beautiful. Her hands were folded delicately over her stomach, the bracelet clutching her left wrist.

He had been unable to shed a single tear, his soul parched from the cries of everyone else around him. Even the Cullens, whose bodies could physically not shed tears, emitted the loudest, driest sobs. Bella, with Nessie's golden locket clinging to her chest, rocked back and forth on a pew; Edward's face was buried in her mahogany hair, his hands tenaciously wrapped around her forearms.

Rosalie sat in the very back, away from everyone else. She kept on shaking her head to and fro, repeating into the depressed air, "This isn't happening. . . This isn't happening. . ." He could relate to the thought. He may have been able to keep his composure for the moment, but sooner or later it would all come back. Jacob had never seen Rosalie look defeated before, not once, yet there she was.

Falling apart.

Every so often, Emmett would glance over his shoulder, and discovered that his wife still was not ready to be comforted. Then, he would turn back and pat Charlie had on the back, whose gaze had been casted skyward as he tried to stifle his own tears.

The rest of the Cullens were relatively quiet in comparison as their heads hung down, yet they cried. Cried in the way Jacob couldn't anymore. They had surrended themselves to the hollow ache in the pit of their stomachs, giving into the choking sensation of a darker reality. Because Nessie was gone, and she wasn't coming back. Their venom, for as powerful it was, could only rescue the dying, not the dead.

And Jacob. . .

Hell, Jacob was barely able to make sense out of anything, wanting to be anywhere but there. That was supposed to be the final time he would see Nessie, and he was far from sure he could handle that. _This isn't happening. . . This isn't happening. . . This is not happening. . . _It was the only phrase that maintained his mood, jarring his sorrow, as he listened to the cries of the Cullens, but kept to himself. This was his punishment for not being able to rescue Nessie—life.

Not heaven, not hell, not even limbo. Life.

Opening his eyes to the world, now much brighter than the world of yesterday, Jacob realized none that that mattered now. Nessie was alive in this reality. They had been given a second chance at getting things right.

Beyond the depths of despair, there was a string of hope. Not one strng, but a million. Not strings, but cables. A million steel cables all holding him down to Earth, keeping him here in this spot, but this time. . . the feeling wasn't quite as illuminating. This new chaos wouldn't suddenly blow over. His predicament didn't disappear.

Bella's voice stole Jacob away from his spinning musings. "Jacob. . .? That name didn't sound like his. "Jacob, can you hear me? Jacob. . ."

"Why are you doing this to me, Bella?" Jacob questioned hoarsely, his voice dry.

"I had to tell you the truth," Bella answered, kneeling down beside Jacob. She tried to drape an arm around his shoulder, but he immediately rejected the icy contact of her skin. "Jacob, I'm so-"

"I know you are," the shape-shifter said, staring beyond the bushes and the trees in a black state of mind.

"I didn't. . . I didn't know what else to do," she replied quietly, and crossed her arms over her chest, and then leaned against a tree trunk. "You asked for it."

"You could have lied to me."

"And say what?"

"I don't know. Anything but that."

"It's the only way to help."

Jacob swallowed thickly, the back of his throat burning with a need for water. "But I was happy with her."

Bella's eyebrows climbed, her forehead crinkling up long lines, "I know, Jacob. I'm sorry."

"The truth is gonna ruin everything for us," Jacob murmuered, combing his copper digits around Renesmee's bracelet, and finally stood up.

"It hurts me, too, Jacob," Bella said, her eyebrows raising in a triangular form, and exhaled in an exasperation. "I promise it really does. I know how happy you make her, but she will die again if we don't do something to prevent history from repeating itself."

Finally fixating his oak irises upon the pale form of Bella, who would have been his mother in-law, he almost thought she was a phantom of the awful, cold reminder of a past that should have been long forgotten.

His eyes widened, and he coughed out, "No, Bella, no."

"Faethra is on a constant hunt," Bella cautioned, a resonating and wild growl bubbling in the pit of her stomach. "She wants you. That's all."

He shook his head to and from, stepping away from the female vampire; it was as if Bella had transformed into a horrible, haggard giant and he was a terrified, helpless villager. "You can't ask me to. . . Only Nessie can."

"Even if it costs her life?" Bella inquired, shrugging dubiously at Jacob. One foot kicked idly at the gravel as her weight bounced on the opposing knee.

"I need her, Bella," and that was the only tuth and excuse Jacob in his arsenal. "Don't make me do to Nessie what Edward did to you."

The notion itself wrung out his esophagus, the depressing spreading into his feet. Jacob could never forget the state Edward left Bella in, pale and timid and all alone, trugding through the pain like a zombie. The sorrow lied on the milk chocolate surface of Bella's eyes, never truly gone until Edward returned. Really, she had been only a shell of a personality in his absence, just a shadow—not even real. For all the days they spent together earlier on that year, for all of their exchanged secrets and laughs, Jacob could not revive the light in Bella's beautiful, brown eyes that he loved seeing so much. He tried so hard, too, to be her hero in the mess Edward had left in his wake, but it just wasn't meant to turn out that way.

And Jacob could merely make Bella feel better, not whole again.

Doing that to Nessie. . . Jacob couldn't. He couldn't think of Nessie like that—missing him—being miserable, huddled amongst the mud and leaves. How Jacob want Nessie to go through all that suffering?

"Please, Jacob? Renesmee is your imprint, but she's my daughter. Don't force us to lose her again," Bella pleaded in all of her misery.

Jacob exhaled deeply, only trying to breathe out before he became too light-headed. He didn't want to leave Nessie. It had been so long for him, and he was so afraid of losing himself to the never-ending torture that was sure to come; but he had to admit, losing her was worse, which he already knew for a fact.

"How can I?" Jacob inquired, the inkling of abandoning Nessie disgusted him. "She was my wife—is my wife." That's right. They were married. "I have missed her so much—every damn day. I can't live without her. I won't."

Bella glared, outraged at Jacob. "You have to!"

"Oh, please," the wolf-human half-breed muttered bitterly, rolling his eyes. He slanted his lips and shook his head, and started to pace back and forth, just to keep his legs moving. "If you were in Nessie's shoes, you would go mentally insane if Edward did what you're trying to force me to do. I can't. I can't do that to Nessie. How could you ask me to put your own daughter through that kind of pain?"

"Because I have no choice anymore," Bella replied, shrugging. "Jacob, you have to go. Faethra wants to destroy the one thing you love most, and we both know that no one comes close to Nessie."

Damn straight.

That was exactly why Jacob wouldn't follow Bella's orders.

"Yeah. It's not like I can suddenly erase that," Jacob said, his nostrils flared with agitation. "Obviously, it didn't work out or a reason. Nessie kept me going all along."

Bella nodded once. "Yes, she is. So, don't you owe it to Nessie to give her a life of her very own? A real life."

The shape-shifter paused, and exhaled flatly. "But, um. . . She. . ."

"You took all the blame for Renesmee's death," she reminded him in a soft voice as Jacob leaned against a tree to listen. "After all these years, you kept yourself miles away from her," Bella continued evenly, as thought any of that made sense. "I would bet it's because of that same blame. Jacob, that. . . It's been your way of protecting her—by keeping the memories dead, until now. Jacob, this is it. Here it is, your chance to redeem yourself."

Jacob raised an eyebrow, inwardly figuring that Bella must have had eight years worth of thinking and rethinking about this subject over and over, placing all the fault on him. Not that he could particularly blame her. He remembered now those hard days, the ones that would never end.

Despite already knowing her answer, he still asked, "What can I do?"

"Leave," she answered simply. "Move on with your life and pretend these past few weeks were a dream—even a nightmare. You can remember right now just to forget again."

"But I love her," Jacob murmured to himself. He needed her.

"Good. Then, you should already know what needs to be done," Bella said in a subtle tone dripping with triumph, but she still hadn't won yet. "Pretend like you never met Renesmee Black. She never existed. Pretend you never loved her," she went on. "If you can do that, Faethra won't have a reason to come after her anymore."

Jacob glanced over his shoulder with a furrowed eyebrow; Bella didn't know yet. "It's not that simple."

Bella nodded in agreement. "I never said that it would be."

"Bella, I. . ." Jacob trailed off briefly, wondering how to possibly tell the mother of his lover what exactly they had done. ". . . I can't. We just found each other again." Actually, no. Nessie found him; she sat only feet away from him, and instantly, they caught each other's attention.

"Why not?" The vampire inquired demandingly. "Don't you get it? Nessie will die! She's safer and better off without you!"

"But last night, her and I. . . We made love," Jacob spluttered nervously in confession.

"What!" she exclaimed, outraged, but Jacob remained still. She could probably beat him to a pulp in a New York minute, but he wasn't too frightened of what Bella could do to him; he was afraid of what he could do to Nessie. "Jacob, no! How could you?"

"I finally told Nessie that I'm in love with her. I love her, Bella. Why can't you understand that?" Jacob snarled back. He wouldn't end it with Nessie, especially not at a one-night stand.

"Your love!" Bella spat increduously. "Your love destroyed my daughter and will likely do it again!"

"Shut up," Jacob grolwed through gritted teeth.

"Yes, you remember that, too," Bella murmured menacingly, nodding with raised eyebrows. Jacob grimaced subsequently, everything beneathe his skin ready to get away from this placce. "I know you must remember—when I found my daughter's body already cold and broken in the mud, and we would never know what her final thoughts were. You begged her to come back." Jacob's jaw locked. Yes, he remembered. She didn't have to remind him. "You may have forgotten, but you sentenced me to live with that memory every single day since then."

"You have no right to order me to act like a careless douchebag and leave what happened between Nessie and I at a one-night stand! I can't and won't do that to Nessie! I can't pretend we mean nothing," he replied in a feral tone, and then sighed.

Bella put her back against the trunk of a tree, and sank down to the ground. "Oh, my God. . . How could both of you do something so stupid! This—all of this—was your idea!" she bellowed, jabbing an accusatory finger in his direction. "You dragged all of us into this world. I refuse to let my daughter die again, Jacob! Do you understand that much, huh?"

"Hey! You were the one that found Elizabeth!"

"To bring Renesmee back after you let her get away!" Bella yelled back. "Don't you dare try to make me feel sorry for undoing all of your work."

Ouch. "I'm. . . I'm not."

"Please, Jacob? I am begging for you to just think," Bella told him, pulling back a brunette strand of hair back behind her ear. "Think back to that day. Think back to when we found Renesmee. Think about that pain. I had to live with that."

But Jacob couldn't even allow himself to think about that, otherwise he might have bashed his skull into the nearest pavement. "Stop it, Bella. No. Just stop."

"Jacob. . ." Bella clasped her icy hands around Jacob's hot wrist, almost as though they weren't two different species, as though they were still best friends. "I do know what I'm asking you to do. I do. I know that I'm asking you to give up your whole world, but can you really stand yourself if we lost Nessie again, knowing this time we can prevent it? Could you really live through that chaos all over again?"

"No. I couldn't," he whispered honestly, his mouth shrugging tightly at either corner.

"You made a promise to protect her," Bella said solemnly, gesturing coldly at the bracelet. "Live up to it. Don't break your promise."

Furrowing a dark eyebrow, Jacob recalled all the promises he had made to Nessie in this life, and in the last. "I also made a promise to always be there for Nessie."

"I think we both know which option is the lesser evil," she shrugged nonchalantly; his life and his happiness were miniscule priorities, all secondary when it came to Nessie. "Jacob, look at it this way—maybe you can be there for Nessie this final time without literally being there."

"I was never supposed to see Nessie again. . . ?" He glanced at Bella in a thoughtful question, the curved lines upon his forehead raising and thickening. Bella just nodded. "It's kind of funny now that I think about it. That's what it must have been when I met her. Hate should have kept me from loving her, but it didn't." Jacob smiled to himself, remembering the night that they truly mett—the same night Bella started the process of her after-life. Hate was the same thing that led him down those stairs, to Nessie. "This time, it made me fall in love with Nessie harder, faster, and even more. Hate was my only defense, but that wall crumbled all too quickly. Maybe the hate was never there at all."

"You did it all for a reason, Jake. Don't forget. You lived in Seattle, you hated her existence or at least you tried to, you tried to push Nessie away all for her benefit—for her life. Not yours," Bella deliberated softly, the decreasing volume of her voice hinting at her distractions.

"Yeah, I guess I did."

"Jacob?"

Inhaling a deep breath and then letting go, Jacob swallowed—choked back a thick lump that had been swelling in the back of his throat. "I can't break Nessie's heart," Jacob told Bella matter-of-factually, knowing that Nessie loved him as much as he loved her. "She deserves better than that from me, and I intend to be that man she expects me to be. I know what that life is, the one without love. I saw it with my father and you and Leah, and what the idea almost did to Edward. It's easy to feel sorry for people like that, but it's entirely different now that I've gone through it."

"But, Jake. . ."

A life without Nessie was tough, even when he couldn't remember her love at all. Somehow, she was still always with him. He had been hollow, resentful, and bitter. Before, Jacob used to wonder how Bella could be such a zombie, how she could let Edward destroy her that way, and then take him back as if it was nothing. Jacob couldn't understand why Bella was such a sap. It was different now. He could see.

"I'm not gonna force that life on Nessie," Jacob replied. "I love her."

"So what if you love her? It didn't save her life,"Bella shrugged sardonically, malice drip-dropping from her tone. "How can you let Nessie die for you?"

"There has to be another way," he answered certainly.

"If there was another way, we would have found it a lot sooner," Bella choked back, uncrossing her slender arms from over her chest, and stuck her hands in her pockets.

It's not like Jacob wasn't aware of Bella's good point. She wanted to be a good mother, and good mothers were usually desperate to ensure the survival of their young. That was her job—his job. Jacob was in love with Nessie. He should have, and he did, cherish every last breath from Nessie—more than she did. Jacob signed off on that fact a long time ago. He promised Bella that much, that her daughter's life could always be trusted in his hands, for as long as he was around. But Jacob had managed to make a sorry mess out of that mess, hadn't he?

"At least I'll get some more time with Nessie, which I'm losing out on as speak right now," Jacob replied smugly. He shook his head, a big grin buttered on his face. His foot slid backward, and he was ready to get going, and back to Nessie. "Thanks for the reminder, Bells."

"No, Jacob! Wait! How can you be doing this?"

"Ask yourself that."

_And by the way_

_By the way_

_What made you think _

_You'd have it your way?_

_And by the way_

_By the way_

_Don't say I didn't warn you_

_That I'll always stay the same_


	46. Let Me Go

**Disclaimer: Nothing belongs to me. This song is by 3 Doors Down. 3**

_One more kiss could be the best thing_

_But one more lie could be the worst_

_And all these thoughts are never resting_

_And you're not something I deserve_

_In my head, there's only you now_

_This world falls on me_

_And in this world, there's real and make-believe_

_And this seems real to me_

"I'm not gonna force that life on Nessie," Jacob replied. "I love her."

"So what if you love her? It didn't save her life,"Bella shrugged sardonically, malice drip-dropping from her tone. "How can you let Nessie die for you?"

"There has to be another way," he answered certainly.

"If there was another way, we would have found it a lot sooner," Bella choked back, uncrossing her slender arms from over her chest, and stuck her hands in her pockets.

It's not like Jacob wasn't aware of Bella's good point. She wanted to be a good mother, and good mothers were usually desperate to ensure the survival of their young. That was her job—his job. Jacob was in love with Nessie. He should have, and he did, cherish every last breath from Nessie—more than she did. Jacob signed off on that fact a long time ago. He promised Bella that much, that her daughter's life could always be trusted in his hands, for as long as he was around. But Jacob had managed to make a sorry mess out of that mess, hadn't he?

"At least I'll get some more time with Nessie, which I'm losing out on as speak right now," Jacob replied smugly. He shook his head, a big grin buttered on his face. His foot slid backward, and he was ready to get going, and back to Nessie. "Thanks for the reminder, Bells."

"No, Jacob! Wait! How can you be doing this?"

"Ask yourself that."

And with that, Jacob ran for it.

He had to see Nessie right away—his imprint, his dearest companion, his confidant, his lover, his wife, his everything. He had to hold her in his arms, comb his fingers through her lush locks, and tell her all he felt for her, but summarize it in three words. Jacob beamed, lifting his knees faster, and leapt over a thick log—phasing into an invincible creature that ought not be reckoned with; he was strong and had it in within his power to keep her safe, especially. . .

Since he had imprinted.

But that hadn't worked out either. That's what he remembered.

Whooshing past the autumning trees, the same that would soon be dead in the winter, he saw a place. The wolf slowed down and stared, as the shadows emerged from the ground and became figures. High in the wind, Jacob heard the familiar echoes of Bella's voice scratching the cold silence. It was the same spot where they had found Renesmee, the same spot where she took her last breath. Something like that could never be forgotten—not the pain of seeing Nessie right there, holding her in his arms, yet knowing she was still far away, the ache of never getting to see her eyes open ever again, because he was too late.

Damn it.

Jacob stood there for what seemed like hours, playing ping-pong with that needed to be done. There was no absolutely right decision to be made, nor was there a perfectly wrong one—Nessie's heart versus Nessie's life. Which meant more? She disregarded her own life to follow her heart, and there was a strong force telling Jacob that he should honor what Nessie did for him, but he really hadn't—otherwise Nessie would still be in her grave.

But in this new life, he still couldn't be sure. If he chose to stay, Renesmee would be forced to suffer through the same fate he reversed. If he opted to leave, Renesmee would be forced to suffer through a broken heart, half a life. As he would. Either way, Jacob would lose her.

Unless Jacob lured Faethra away.

Bella was right.

Jacob already knew what to do.

Glancing over to the ghosts that would haunt him for the rest of his days, he let out a howl, a ringing sound of pain that would never go away. In his heart was the safest, emptiest place to cry. Forgetting again would not be a possibility, but maybe Jacob would let Faethra get to him.

It seemed like it was the hardest word to say, but he had: "_Goodbye_."

. . .

Billy Black could only listen to his son as he babbled on about work, how an important job came up and that his boss needed him back as soon as possible, and how much Jacob actually wanted to get back to his home and his life.

"So, you're leaving again?"

"Yep."

He swallowed, still trying to comprehend Jacob's words. "And does Nessie know?"

Jacob's gaze transferred from his father's eyes down to the carpet floor, and then nodded. "Of course. Leah and Nahuel are probably with her now."

"How is she taking it?" Billy inquired in concern, shifting around uncomfortably in his wheelchair. That warmed Jacob's heart a little bit—his father acting a part of Nessie's family, whether or not he was in the picture. "She must have been in tears—such a sweet girl."

Yeah. Way to rub it in.

"Actually," Jacob began, unable to meet Billy's eye, "Nessie took it really well. She's a really good sport."

"With the way you were snuggling up to her at Seth's party, everyone was making bets on when you'd pop the question. Edward said that it would take another century if he had anything to say about it. . ." Billy chuckled awkwardly. "I definitely thought you two would end up together. I even thought you were finally happy for a second there, son."

"Me, too."

"Do you care about Nessie?"

Inwardly, Jacob rolled his eyes. What kind of question was that anyway? Of course Jacob cared about Nessie, that's why he was destroying his own life. Because he loved her when it was tearing him apart.

Outwardly, Jacob managed a sarcastic chortle. "I do, Dad." Too much. "Just not enough to hang around here."

"It's a sad thing," Billy admitted gruffly. "I would've loved having Nessie in this family, you two creating a family of your own—popping out a couple of kids, so I can tell them some embarrassing stories about their dad."

Did Billy even realize how he was twisting around the dagger in Jacob's already-bleeding chest?

But that's now how it was meant to be.

"Too bad," Jacob shrugged as though none of it mattered to him. "It wasn't in the cards."

"You just had to play the Joker card, didn't ya?" Billy sighed.

"Well, you know me," Jacob half-smiled. "It's not in my nature to stay happy for long periods of time."

Billy rolled his eyes. "Like you could possibly know that for sure. Son, you'll find that right girl for you. She's out there."

"I doubt that."

"Why?"

Why? He could sum it up in one word—Nessie. She was the only one for him, and not because the imprint told him so. She was simply the only one that he wanted to be with.

"There are hundreds of different reasons," Jacob replied, at least he could be honest about that.

"Name one," Billy challenged, folding his arms over his chest.

And Jacob took to it easily enough. "The right girl could be halfway around the world, speaking another language, or maybe she's married to some other jerk, or be some closet weirdo, or-"

"Hush up," Billy grumbled, furrowing an eyebrow. "I said one, smartass."

"Or she's dead," the younger of the two Black men remarked.

"Don't be ridiculous, Jacob. Your girl can't be dead," Billy said, adorning a sideways grin.

"How do you know?" Jacob asked, cocking an eyebrow.

"Because there's still that spark in your eyes," Billy replied triumphantly. "It wouldn't be there if she had already passed away."

"Dad. . ." He swore that he would never ask, but now Jacob had to quench his own curiosity for his own well-being. "When Mom died, how did you keep going on?"

"It wasn't easy," Billy confessed, not seeming too phased by the query. "Some days. . . It's still hard as hell, but I have my family to think about. Most of all, while Sarah was still alive, she gave me enough love to last a lifetime."

"I bet that kind of love is really rare," Jacob observed aloud, sticking the tip of his tongue to the inside of his cheek.

"Not really," Billy answered as he shook his head. "You just gotta learn how to wait for it."

Yeah, right. "That may take more patience and optimism than I have."

"Listen, boy," Billy exclaimed, laying his right arm over an armrest, and cast a suspicious gaze at Jacob, "are you gonna talk to be about what's really going on with you and Nessie?"

"Nothing." Anymore. "There's just nothing between us." Except a lifetime.

"Heh. Who do you think you're fooling? What happened, Jake? Last night, the two of you were acting like blissful newlyweds," Billy tried reasoning with him. "How can you sit there and tell me that there's nothing?"

"Nessie. . ." Jacob gritted his teeth, his voice barely breaking through, ". . . and I aren't meant to be together." That was the absolute truth. "That's all. Friends. We're friends, or at least we can be if this golden hind nonsense is ever resolved."

"Oh, I see."

"What?"

"The golden hind," Billy retorted, pinching the bridge of his nose. "You're leaving Nessie in hopes of saving her. You think she's perfectly protected without you causing trouble for her." Boy, talk about hitting the nail on the head.

"That's not it at all," Jacob lied.

"Sure it is, Jacob. It's that kind of love that makes you do stupid things," Billy answered, waving his hand at Jacob.

"Listen to me, Pops. I have a job back in Seattle, friends, a frickin' life. I can't put that all on hold for some girl," Jacob replied quickly—bitterly. Nessie wasn't just 'some' girl to him.

"You're leaving Nessie," Billy nodded his head to one side and then the other. "Maybe you want the golden hind to get her."

"No!" Jacob bellowed with a roar, wrongly stirred by the idea. "Nessie has done a lot for me. I owe her a lot more than that, but I can't lead her on any longer. She's be safe in Forks with the Cullens and the pack looking after her."

Billy shook his head. "It's a damn shame."

"What is?"

"You and Nessie not working out," Billy retorted, nodding simply. He knocked on the wooden armrest, and wore a disappointed look. "You're letting yourself lose out on a your own dream, buddy. It was there. I know it was, and you just don't have the wits to convince me otherwise. Yeah," he coughed. "Ya'll could have gone the distance—a house, cute kids, and an argument here and there."

Jacob chuckled ironically. "I think you're senile, old man."

"I think you're in denial," Billy countered easily enough, which wasn't entirely untrue. "But hey, if you know what you're doing, who am I to stop you? Hmmm," he paused cheekily. "Boy, you must love her more than I imagined—to give up your own shot at happiness. That's brave."

"Dad. . ."

"Yeah?"

"Make sure Paul takes good care of Rachel," Jacob advised, getting up from the couch and walked toward the front door.

"I always do," Billy replied, wheeling himself over. "I want all my kids to find love."

"Take care of yourself, too, Pops," Jacob said; he would phone in every once in awhile, of course. This wouldn't be the last time they would weak.

"Sure thing," Billy nodded umpromisingly. "I guess I'll see you in another eight years."

Jacob opened the front door, taking one step out the threshold and into the gray light, with a suitcase at his side and not much else. "Bye."

* * *

><p>With all of his things packed and loaded into the trunk of his Rabbit, Jacob opened the car door—his arms weighed down with led—climbed lazily into the driver's seat, and stomped down hard on the gas petal. He pulled out of his father's driveway, and began his journey on the narrowest—in fact, it was so narrow he probably couldn't have turned back if he wanted to, and boy he wanted to—blackest road he would ever see again.<p>

And he would miss his home greatly—Billy, Rachel, his friends, and. . . her, of course; but after today, this could never be home for him. It would be dead, sort of like him.

Driving passed tree by tree, Jacob thought to himself over and over again that all of this was the worst mistake he would ever make, excluding the fact that he let his imprint die in the first place. He should have never came back to all of this suffering; he shoud have never made a thousand and one promised to Renesmee; he should have never made love with her; and right now, he also knew that he really shouldn't be leaving her. Yet, the wheels of Jacob's car spun in their ceaseless circles, down the blank, black road that promised to guide him all the way to hell.

And for her—to hell he would go.

This was his destiny now, and destiny never gave him an option that would work out in his favor. That was one of the consquences of having terrible luck.

When you win, you lose.

Jacob was gaining much here—however, it didn't really feel like that—and only a fraction of him managed to realize that. He was helping his former beloved to move on and start a better life, one where he stuck in nonexistance, one where she wouldn't die at the eve of the beginning, one that was Faethra-less. He was assissting her to grow, to be safe, and to. . .forget. Jacob wouldn't have to live with knowing that Nessie was dead because of his failure; he, too, was winning.

When Faethra leaves Forks and La Push in pursuit of him, he wouldn't be quick enough to be victorious; he would let her kill him. Then, all of this mess would be over.

Yeah.

To add, Jacob was also gaining a life in Seattle—a job, money, and one really good friend, Lizzie. It would be nice to see her again. She was a naturally comforting person—sunny and warm, like Renesmee, and Lizzie was also very motherly. . .

But with the winning came a lot of losing, which Jacob could never get used to. He could never be thrilled to be without the woman that always knew how (as well as when) to call him out on his crap, and how to make him smile again. Because of her—because she existed and because that love that he felt for her was a couple of shades too much—Jacob would lose out on his own home, his own life, and his own wife, all the things and all the people he had been yearning for.

Jacob could never come back. He would never be the Alpha his wolf pack could count on; he would never get to know Billy as he aged faster and faster; he would never hold a son or daughter that would have been the spitting image of his or her mother. He would never be with her, his soul mate. It was impossible. Each obstacle they would face from here on out would be faced apart—for him, alone. There was no one Jacob could depend on for consolance, except her. She was his best friend, just everything in his life that was never meant to last.

And he would be lying if he said that he didn't resent her just a little bit, because if she still wanted a family, a home, a life outside of their love, she had all the resources to get all of it. She actually had a chance. Then again, so did Jacob.

He was still able to meet a nice enough girl to settle down with and create an adequate family with, but the notion seemed empty. She wouldn't be the love of his life, and Jacob was a picky person. He had already been with the best.

How could he return to a life of dating a string of random girls that he was more annoyed with than charmed by? How could he want to figure out if any of those girls were compatible enough to marry? And then, how could Jacob marry one? He could never.

Jacob inhaled sharply and then exhaled flatly as he stared at the straight, narrow road. He longed to hush the workings of his mind just so he could focus on the positives of Seattle. At least there wouldn't be as much rain. There would be less opportunity to get caught in the dissaray of a storm, less of a chance to pull Renesmee close to his body as the clouds clashed and the rain fell down.

Positive. Keep it positive.

There was one comforting fantasy that popped up in his head. Her, of course. Getting at least to say goodbye. Jacob would love to see her one last time—to share one more kiss, to partake in one last touch, and then their final farewell.

Never look back.

Yes, that would have been splendid, but Jacob knew himself much too well.

One more kiss would turn into endless hours of his lips never ceasing to free hers; one last touch would turn into his wide hands roaming to every last inch of her smooth skin, lingering at her soft fingertips; one final farewell would turn into his biggest regret. Then, he could be counted upon to look back a thousand more times for a glimpse of his past's phantom. Jacob could never be able to will himself away. All of his defenses would crumble down, his strength would diminish, and history would repeat itself.

But Jacob should have been less precarious with his thoughts, because fate cruelly granted him his wish.

There, standing on the border between life and death, was the most stubborn woman he had ever met, the very same one who couldn't leave well enough alone. Her hands were balled into tight fists, planted on each of her hips as a stern, determined, and beautiful expression adorned her sweet face. Jacob could see the hurt, the confusion, and the exasperation hidden in her body.

Oh, his Nessie.

Inwardly, Jacob couldn't help but smile a bit.

Slowly, Jacob climbed out of his car, his eyes never leaving her fearful form. Nessie was too beautiful and he couldn't look away.

Was any of this real?

Sadly.

Was she really his imprint?

It sure felt like it.

Had she really been his wife some time before?

Yes.

In another life, she once had a ring and a bracelet that proved their love was a moutain.

Still, Jacob made a B line to Nessie, mirroring her headstrong determination and said, "Get out of my way, Nessie."

Nessie quirked an eyebrow, and gestured to Jacob's vehicle. "What-What's this?"

He glanced over his shoulder at the car, and then glanced back to Nessie. Emitting a soft sigh, Jacob answered, "I have to go."

"Go?" Nessie echoed, perplexed. "You're leaving? Just like that?"

"Congratulations, Nancy Drew," Jacob snorted sardonically, trying to act as agitated by her existance as possible. "You solved the mystery. What are you going to do next? Go to Disney World. Drop me a line. Until then, get out of here. Go home."

Nessie crossed her arms over her chest, stamping a leg. "Jacob, what has gotten into you? Why are you acting like such a jerk?"

Because he wanted her to hate him enough to let him go. Because he couldn't tell her the truth. Because he loved her too much. "Because it's in my nature."

"Oh, don't give me that crap, Jake," Nessie said, rolling her eyes in an incredulous manner. "Tell me the truth."

"I don't have to tell you a damn thing, Cullen," Jacob replied with a low growl, wishing that she would just move out of his way already.

"Cullen. . . ?" The half-human half-vampire girl's milk chocolate orbs widened only slightly at the name, her face contorting into sheer pain for a nanosecond, no human eye could have been able to catch it. "Are you really back on that? Jake. . . Talk to me. You can always talk to me."

Jacob shrugged nonchalantly. "I'm going back to Seattle. That's all."

That's all. As if going back to Seattle wasn't a death sentence.

God, he hated himself. He hated forcing himself to wear a mask of absolute, unrelenting willpower. It sucked, having to be so strong. Why did she have to be here? How the hell did Nessie even know? Was Jacob predictable to the point of fault? Jacob didn't want to be harsh with Nessie. He knew leaving would be easy, particularly on her. He wanted to hold her; he wanted to love her; he wanted to make all of her pain go away, but Jacob was powerless.

"I don't understand," Nessie replied, gazing into Jacob's hot, solid, and dark brown eyes, attempting to read him.

"There's nothing much to understand," Jacob retorted, wondering to himself how the hell he wasn't breaking down already into a puddle of sweat. "I'm leaving. Is that enough explanation for you? Because I have to get out of here." Right now, before he cracked. "You're kind of blocking my path."

She lowered an eyebrow in irritation, her nostrils flared. "Do you remember anything about this morning, or maybe last night?" He was a bit insulted by that question. For the most part, Jacob wasn't the wham-bam-thank-you-ma'am type of guy. "We love each other, remember? You and I danced, talked, and you said that you loved me. I love you, too, Jacob. I still do."

No, he couldn't hear that. Nessie was really planning on making this harder than it needed to be on him, and she wouldn't be fair. She loved him,too. What was that supposed to do? Convince him to stay? Jacob wasn't about to allow mere words to persuade him into making the worst decision. He wouldn't be broken apart that easily. . . But he wanted to do.

"Save it, Baby Cullen. I'm not in the mood," Jacob huffed, sounding bitter and cold.

"But we made love!" Nessie exclaimed, perturbed by Jacob's lack of feeling. "I thought it was a special night. You were so warm and tender. Maybe I wasn't good enough, but I'm sure if we keep trying, I can get better."

His stomach churned, sickened by Nessie doubting that she was the best he ever had. And damn it, she was. Jacob couldn't easily ignore the memory of Nessie's face twisting into utter bliss as her tightness spasmed around him; he couldn't forget how right it was to have her in his arms. Nessie wasn't the type of girl any male could wash away with soap and too many tequila shots, but she wasn't really the type of girl that any guy would let get away in the first place. The night prior was perfection, and it wasn't going to kill him to pretend like it wasn't.

"Jeeze, this has nothing to do with you," he replied with a roll of his eyes. "You are not the center of the universe." Just the center of his.

"Jacob, will you call?" she inquired in a tone of hopefulness.

"Yes," Jacob answered truthfully. He would keep in touch with Billy, Rachel, Seth, Sam, and occasionally to see how Nessie was doing. . .

"Me?" Nessie asked being more specific. "Will you call me?"

Again, Jacob chose to be honest. "No."

"Will you write letters to me?"

"No."

"How about me getting a text from you every once in awhile?"

"No."

"Emails?"

"No."

"So, nothing at all?"

"I don't want anything to do with you ever again," Jacob said, his voice never faltering as he spoke.

He wouldn't have been able to maintain any sanity after he just demoted himself to being only a good friend to Nessie, as well as putting her in the same status—pretending that last night and a hundred other nights didn't exist. That didn't make any sense. They were married, for goodness sake. What kind of cruelty would that have been? It was bad enough that Jacob would always think of Nessie and the life they could have had, or once shared, if Faethra's goal wasn't to somehow seperate them.

"Oh, I get it. You're breaking up with me," the hybrid girl concluded, which sounded bizarre even to Jacob's ears. Wrong, almost.

"Yeah," the shape-shifter confirmed, nodding once. He wanted to dig his fingers deep into his scalp and rip his hair out.

"I truly wish you could tell me why," Nessie said, gently sighing as she shook her head in disapproval. "I don't know what the problem is. I don't understand it. If I did, maybe I could try to help fix whatever it is."

"Nessie's, it's not you, it's me," Jacob spouted it in stupidity. He hadn't meant to say that—he really hadn't, but for some reason, that's what came out. Mentally, Jacob slapped himself across the back of his head, knowing that was exactly Nessie wanted to do right about now.

"What?" Nessie questioned, partially astonised and partially infuriated. "You did not," she snarled, locking her jaw in annoyance, "just use the most cliché break up line in the book on me! How can you be doing this?"

"I'm not doing anything," Jacob answered in a feigned sense of pride.

"Of course you are," Nessie spat matter-of-factually, shouting at him. "You're spoiling everything we mean to each other! But why? Last night-"

He was kind of hearing about last night. "Last night was nothing but a huge mistake," he told her, too aware of the beating of her heart—how it momentarily stopped, and then pounded back to life. Jacob swallowed, also knowing there was a partial truth in what he had just said. "I shouldn't have said anything. I shouldn't have ever touched you. If I could take it back, I would."

"You regret all of it," Nessie murmured blankly, biting the inside of her right cheek. "Okay. You regret me."

"I'm sorry," Jacob apologized.

He was sorry—extremely so.

"So, you didn't mean it when you said. . . ?" Nessie trailed off, straining her fingers as she kicked at the dust on the ground.

"No. I lied to you," the shape-shifter replied, beginning in untruth that caused Jacob too feel totally repulsed by himself. "Every time I said it, it was a lie." God, no. Jacob just wanted to get a knife and slice his tongue off. His love was not a lie. It could never be. "You wanted to hear it, and I wanted to have sex with you in return. It seemed like a fair exchange at the time. I mean, you bought it all so easily. How could I resist?"

Shut up, shut up!

Nessie nodded, unphased by Jacob's bullshit explanation. "Then, I gave you exactly what you wanted. Sex, right?"

He was suddenly the one that didn't trust her. "Yeah."

"You used me," she stated, appearing completely convinced by the lie. Nessie swallowed, rolling back her shoulders to keep from falling to pieces. "Every second of last night, every promise you made to me, every kiss was all apart of some scheme to get into my pants. What about this morning?"

"Well, who knew it?" Jacob chuckled huskily, stretching out his right arm forward. He popped his neck and continued, "You were such a damn good fuck, you made my brain go on the fritz. See?" he mocked her vulgarly. "You're not as bad as you think you are."

That's it. Once this was all over, Jacob was going to drive himself right off a cliff. Save Faethra the trouble. He couldn't stand being such a damn prick to his Nessie, when the only crime she ever committed was loving him—a spineless coward—until her last breath. But he was conflicted, and he didn't know what else to say to get Nessie to go on home.

_Hate me._

_Just hate me._

Sliding one foot back, Nessie took one step away from Jacob, and turned around. "This isn't happening. This isn't real. The way you kissed me—you meant it," she thought aloud, ever-sure of his feelings for her, which was mildly funny.

There was a small part of him that was appalled at everything he was saying. In the reality previous to this utterly tragic one, Jacob would always reassure Nessie that he would be forever in her life—as long as she wanted him. It was a promise that he couldn't fathom going back on. Yet Jacob had been so naïve back then, lost in his own land of make-believe and fairy dust, unknowing of the golden hinds.

The man he was then and the man he was now were two different people.

One full of hope, the other full of despair. One would have eventually found a way to defeat Faethra, all he needed was just a little more time; the other had already discovered a solution to stop Faethra, and his time was running thin. One would have always remained with Nessie, to love her up close and personal; the other would be forced to love her from a distance. It seemed that the only had one thing in common—life set them up to love Nessie, only to lose her in the end.

"I'm a pretty good liar," Jacob finally insisted, albeit smugly. "Maybe for a second, I even managed to fool myself."

Nessie turned around, facing him with an expression that was erased of an indulgence. Jacob gulped, practically catching a glimpse of the slippery wheels inside of her head spinning and spinning, planning something that should probably get him to relent, but he was prepared for almost anything she would try. Crying, whining, begging, etc.

"Fine," Nessie shrugged relaxedly, but Jacob knew her much better than that. He knew Nessie would never simply accept him leaving without a proper debate first. "You got one over on me."

"Now that we've established that, you can go on home to mother," Jacob taunted in a mean manner, waving a hand at her to go.

"Not quite yet, Jacob Black," Nessie giggled patronizingly, combing an auburn tendril back behind the shell of her ear. "We're not finished."

"Oh, yeah? Who says?" he challenged.

"I do," Renesmee nodded smugly, a confident smile plastered to her raspberry mouth. "Before you go. . . Come on. Let's have one more round before you leave."

Her fixation on Jacob went from furious to fiery, catching her reddening bottom lip between her pearly teeth. She gazed upon him, with her milk chocolate eyes darkening to the most radiant fire, the closers drawing Jacob closer. Nessie rested a hand over her chest, tugging her blue blouse into a V-shape—the thin line between her breasts bulging out of the fabric. And that's when Jacob realized he wasn't totally prepared for Nessie's tricks. Seduction. That was definitely a new technique.

Jacob shifted his weight awkwardly from foot to foot, huffing out a sharp breaht. "I don't think that's such a good idea."

"Why not?" she queried in sultry tone, crossing the distance between their bodies. Jacob watched, entranced by the slight, teasing sway of Nessie's hips, moving from right to left. "Nobody is around," Nessie pointed out, playfully pulling down at Jacob's shirt. "Who is going to stop us? No one. No one, Jacob. This moment belongs to us. My body belongs to only you."

She slid a hand under the hem of his shirt, the magical electricity of her fingertrips igniting the sparks of his skin to a hot temperature, as her pulsing lips placed a gentle kiss on his adam's apple, and smoothly burned into his pores.

"But I don't love you," he reasoned dishonestly, half-heartedly trying to resist the way Nessie's touch lingered, tying his stomach into tight knots.

"That doesn't change the way I feel," Nessie whispered against his ear, her warm breath brushing under his lobe. "I still love you. Come on, Jacob."

"No, Nessie. Stop it," Jacob pleaded, weakened by the allure of her.

"I don't want to stop," Nessie retorted softly, tilting Jacob's chin down to her. "Please, Jacob? Do you love me?"

Yes. "No."

"Then, you shouldn't have any qualms about fucking me on the road," Nessie laughed, pressing her breasts against his chest. She knew very well that Jacob wanted to. "Go ahead, Jacob. Fuck me. I want you to fuck me."

Oh, yes. The thought was so tempting. "You're not that kind of girl," Jacob replied, tenderly wrapping his hands around Nessie's wrists, and pushed her devious contact away.

"Yes, I am," Nessie insisted, using her vampire strength to easily overpower his. She sighed, brushing their nether lips together. "I'm the kind of girl that plays fair. We did it my way last night, and now we'll do it your way." His way? "You know what want to."

Jacob put an index finger to Nessie's cheek, tracing around the apple shape. "We need to stop. I can't do that to you. You deserve better."

"I don't care about better," Renesmee replied, not giving up. Her arms wrapped around Jacob's broad shoulders, giving him a look of pure lust. "I want you, Jacob. Please? I need you."

With those words uttered from her sweet mouth and rolling around in his head, Jacob stepped Nessie around. His fingers became buried in the thin flesh of her hips, and he raised her to the hood of his Rabbit. Their lips moldedly firmly and fervently together, alit like fire by their mutual love and lust. His mouth was superglued hard on hers, chained to the exact place where he wanted to be. Jacob's teeth grazed over Nessie's bottom lip as he slid his lower body betwixt her flushing thighs, their stupid clothes the only barrier blocking their contact. Nessie whimpered gently, her legs tenaciously encircling his lower torso.

It was as though their bodies were locked together, as though this wasn't goodbye.

"No!" the man-wolf half-breed hissed, stepping three, long strides backward. "That's enough," he panted harsly. "Go away. I don't want to fuck you."

"Hmm," came her calm sigh. Nessie slid gracefully off the hood, and patted one of her reddish-brownish tendrils. "You're a pretty good liar. Maybe for a second, you even managed to fool me."

"You're not funny," he growled, shoving his hands deep into his pockets. "Acting like some skank wouldn't get you into my pants any day of the week. It's not my style."

"Whatever," Nessie laughed, tugging her blouse back up. "Don't pretend like you're weren't the slightest bit intrigued by my offer."

"I had no intention of getting down and dirty in the middle of the damn road," Jacob informed her snobblishly. She had been counting on Jacob to back down—because she had learned that people only fuck other people when lust is the fuel to the fire, but people make love when their hearts are involved.

"I know," Nessie scoffed, wearing a cheeky smirk, "because I mean more to you than just sex. You love me, Jacob. Why are you trying so hard to deny that?"

Jacob rubbed the back of his forehead, weary. "I can't lie to you anymore, Nessie. Not like this. I don't love you."

"Yes, you do," she countered, clenching her fists. "I can see it in your eyes that you love me, but you're fighting it."

"Listen to me closely," Jacob demanded cautiously, a glower painted on his copper features. "I don't love. I can't love you. I have to go back to Seattle."

"No!" Nessie shouted, huffing out angrily. "Why are you doing this to us?"

"There is no 'us,' Nessie. I'm sorry," Jacob apologized, longing for the warmth of her hands. "It was wreckless of me to lead you on."

"You are a pathetic liar, Jacob Black. I can see right through you. Tell me the truth."

"Nessie. . ."

"Was it my mother?"

"No. . ."

"Did she say something to get to you? Did she put you up to this?"

"No. Don't be crazy, Nessie."

"She did! I knew it! What did she say?"

"It doesn't matter."

"Yeah, well, maybe it matters to me, Jacob!" Nessie yelled, a glare crackling on her face.

"Bella made me realize that you and I are terrible for each other," Jacob confessed, speaking in a hushed, hesistant tone. He was reluctant to throw Bella under the bus.

"That's not her call to make," Nessie replied, arching an eyebrow.

Jacob almost cackled at the irony; it was exactly Bella's call to make. "She's a concerned parent and with any luck, you will be, too, someday in the future. You'll want your son or daughter to listen to you. Give your mother a break."

"But, Jacob, she wants to keep us apart, and you're just letting her win," Nessie hissed, pacing back and forth; she couldn't know. She wouldn't ever be able to understand.

"No," he exhaled, solemn. "I'm letting you win."

"What a load of bull!" she snarled viscously, the left top of her mouth raised in a growl.

"You are way out of my league, and look—I want it to end now before I lose you, because I could never survive through that," Jacob explained in partial truths, looking into Nessie's softening eyes, where he wanted to disengage. "So, I don't have a choice. I have to leave."

"Leave me, you mean," Renesmee corrected him. "You're leaving me."

"Yeah. I am. This is the only way," Jacob nodded at her, undenying.

"Don't fool yourself, Jacob," Nessie begged, reaching out for his hand, to which Jacob automatically pulled back his own hand. "You don't have to go anywhere. Don't leave me. Stay."

"Stop it," Jacob snarled on frustration. "Don't make this any harder than it is."

"I love you. And if you can't stay, I'll follow you."

"Nessie, no. You can't.

"Why not?" Nessie questioned slowly, probably as tired as he was from all this arguing. "Why are you so hell-bent on seeing us fail?"

"Because we will never be good together," Jacob answered. "I don't belong in your world and you don't belong in mine."

"My world. Your world," Nessie chortled sarcastically, rolling her eyes. "Unlike you, I can't trick myself into believing we are divided, because you are wrong. We can create our own world. We can be out of place with the rest of the planet, but still belong to each other."

"You're talking about fairy tales," Jacob said, shrugging casually, but grinned at the romantic sentiment.

"I'm not. I'm talking about something worth believing in until my very last breath, something worth going through hell for—going to hell for. I'm talking about something you would give up and run away from, what you're lying for," Renesmee elaborated, tentatively reaching out for Jacob's hand again, but he refused her.

"Those are pretty words, but that's the problem. Words don't mean anything to me. Promises don't mean anything," Jacob squinted his eyes in thought. "There's no reaching me. You might as well stop trying."

"Jacob-"

"I'm sorry, Nessie," Jacob apologized yet again. He would say it a million times more just to have a few more seconds in her company.

"Then, why?" she asked incredulously.

"I told you already," he answered.

"No. You didn't. You've been lying," Nessie fired back. "We're meant for each other. That's been obvious since the day we met and every day we've spent together and last night. So, don't you dare stand there and tell me that we're not good together. Damn it, Jacob!" she exclaimed, stomping a foot. "Jacob, we're unstoppable as long as we're together. I know you're lying to me."

"I'm not," Jacob fibbed in a mumble.

"You are. So, what is it? Is it Faethra?" Nessie inquired, raisng and then lowering a shoulder.

"Maybe," Jacob replied in exhaustion.

"You're leaving to protect me." A slow and steady gasp eminated from Nessie's throat, a lightbulb flickering on. "That is a very noble thing for you to do for me, Jacob, even though you claim not to care. It shows that you do."

"Whatever reason you want to fabricate in your mind is okay, but try not to share it with everyone. You might be committed," Jacob snorted cynically, appearing disgusted.

"Sarcastic until the end, huh? I guess it's easier than being honest," Nessie scoffed, shrugging her left shoulder.

"That's not it," Jacob retorted smoothly. "You're crazing for holding on, and I don't want that for you." Although, the thought sickened him, he wanted what was best for Nessie; he wanted her to moveon, fall in love, and become a mother.

"Then, I should thank you. I should be grateful for your amazing selflessness," Nessie started, folding her arms ove her chest, then half-smiled, "but I'm not. It's my life. It's not up to you to save me."

"It's so easy for you to say that, but if our roles were reversed, I know exactly what measures you would take to save my life," Jacob told her in a low voice.

"I wouldn't leave you," she retorted matter-of-factually.

Jacob sneered. "Yes, you would," he said. Nessie would drug him, say her goodbyes, and leave him passed out like a drunk slob on the dining table. "Get of your preachy high-horse."

Nessie giggled, the sound strained and stressed. "Okay. You caught me. I would do anything for you."

"Because you love me," Jacob offered. "Stupid girl."

"Were you even going to say goodbye?" the halfing asked, though she already knew the answer. Perhaps she was hanging on to false hope that she could still somehow convince him to stay.

"Closure is over-rated," Jacob replied, shaking his head, "but here we are. If it's anything you and I were meant to do, it's say goodbye. I'm not coming back. Move on with your life, Nessie. Don't wait around for me. . ."

"I'll take that as a friendly suggestion," Nessie smiled, a warm illumination extending into the jade specks of her flawless eyes, reminding him of the world he was leaving behind.

"Goodbye."

"Sure, sure."

Nessie turned away as Jacob did, their individual steps perfectly in sync, with the sounds of walking forward. Jacob inhaled the rainy wind, closing his eyelids to listen—to listen of Renesmee's light footfalls, to the quickening, thunderous beats of her beautiful heart, his mind seeking shelter from the chill from the rest of the world in the noises, though he was committed to not looking back. He wouldn't, for fear that all of his control would disintergrate as he drowned in the warm, chocolate oceans of Nessie's amazing eyes, his imprint's soul.

One more time. . .

But with another hesitant step, Jacob let go of a breath and paused, unsure. He turned around at the same as she did. In the same second, Nessie and Jacob were engulfed in each others arms. His hand cupped the back of her head, their lips laced tenaciously, as though for the last time. This time, Jacob moaned, savoring the strawberry-fruit taste of her tongue over his. They could have gone on forever like that, until Jacob felt a salty liquid roll down his cheek; he had no clue if it was from his eyes or Nessie's.

"I have to go now," Jacob informed her, pulling away. "I really do, Nessie."

"I know," Nessie sniffled, nodding, "but I have to tell you one last thing, Jacob."

"What?" he asked.

"I don't care about what distances I have to cross. I will never stop reaching for you."

_You love me_

_But you don't know who I am_

_I'm torn between this life I lead_

_And where I stand_

_And you love me_

_But you don't know I am_

_So let me go_

_Let me go_

_Just let me go_

_Let me go_

* * *

><p><strong>Author's Note: Yeah. It's okay. I want to punch Jacob in the face, too. <strong>


	47. Do What You Have To Do

**Disclaimer: As the story goes, all characters belong to Stephanie Meyer. Song by Sarah McLachlan.**

**Author's Note: I know you all are probably hoping for a happy ending, but from here this story is definitely going to have its ups and downs. You'll just have to keep reading until the very end to see if Jacob and Nessie get a happily ever after. Anywho, just for now, I'm going to delve into my favorite halfie-hybrid's point of view for the next few chapters. I can't deal with Jacob's, but we'll still see plenty of him. I promise.**

_What ravages of spirit_

_Conjured this temptuous rage_

_Created you a monster_

_Broken by the rules of love_

_And fate has lead you through it_

_You do what you have to do_

_And I have the sene to recognize that_

_I don't know how to let you go_

Sunday.

It was probably the easiest day to get through. Life had gone on as if Jacob Black had done Renesmee Cullen the hugest favor of her life—and he had. She had stuffed all of her clothes into bags, left her Grandpa Charlie's house, and went back to the Cullen household in Takoma. She was far too occupied to give a single thought about him, or at least until Charlie inquired Nessie about Jacob's address—where he lived, so Charlie could sent the rest of Jacob's junk back to him. Nessie had taken a few human seconds to respond, but told her grandfather that she didn't know. Then Charlie walked away, and left Nessie alone with her secret thoughts.

For a few minutes, Nessie sat on top of her mother's old bed with her head firmly held between her straining hands. Hyperventilating, Nessie felt her head shredding into a thousand pieces, as if it was made out of crinkled paper. But it wasn't the time for a breakdown. Nessie, choking back an oncoming sob, told herself to get a grip and went back to her packing, her heart and her brain checked out as her body kicked into auto-pilot.

Bella came to pick Renesmee up from Charlie's house. The car ride home was mostly spent in an uncomfortable silence. Nessie opted to sit in the backseat, boiling with fury to be in the same space with her mother, one of the people she held responsible for sabotaging her relationship with Jacob, and had no desire to be near her. Not that Bella didn't try a few times to start a conversation, but Nessie's responses were always quipped and laced in disinterest.

When the finally arrived home, a feast of Renesmee's favorite foods were displayed beautifully over the dining table—a green pepper and bacon omelette, a rare steak smothered in Serendipity seasoning, buttered French bread with a golden brown crust, and a boiling cup of mountain lion's blood. The delicious aromas made Nessie's mouth water, her stomach growling as if weeks had gone by since she had last eaten. With each of her family members giving her a friendly smile, Nessie grabbed a plate and dug into her buffet, devouring every last morsel.

Monday.

A day everyone hates.

Each hour carried out into eternity, dragging out into the Forever Road, starting from the moment Nessie's milk chocolate irises opened to awaken to the sun's dull rays. Her stomach was still happily full from the night before and getting up from bed seemed like an awful chore, but she managed. Nessie hopped into the shower, the warm beating down, her alabaster skin flushed from the demanding heat. The lavender soap felt sensational running down her body, aiding her uneasiness, and she was comforted by the enclosed and clear shower walls. She almost felt clean, the slippery caress of the soap replacing his careful one—from her neck, to her breasts, to her legs—until the water was turned off and her feet touched the cold tile floor.

Despite the thorough scrubbing upon her flesh, she was still drenched in a woodsy, saltwater scent, and she despised it. Then, Nessie impatiently grabbed strawberry lotion from the bottom cabinet, below the sink, and put at least three coats of it on her skin, but that didn't work either. Jacob was still there, all over Nessie, in a way. So, she took another shower. That, too, still didn't work.

Once Nessie had dried herself up and dressed, she sought out a civil conversation, but in the Cullen house, it was easy to find eight separate ones.

First, she found her Grandfather Carlisle, and the two spoke of international politics and illegal medical practices. Second, she found Esme, who chatted to her granddaughter about a new cupcake recipe that Nessie was only happy to taste test. Third came Jasper; he recounted a fair, few Civil War stories—one consisted of Peter and Charlotte, a tale of two lovers that ran away to be together. Fourth was Rosalie, who grabbed Renesmee's hairbrush and helped her goddaughter brush her long reddish-bronwnish tendrils, one by one, and two women spoke of fashion, attractive men, and pretty shoes.

Fifth was the seer, Alice, who demanaded Nessie's help in donating a few hundred outfits to charity, outfits that Alice had only worn once and quickly lost interest in. When Nessie finished up there, she was intent on making herself a bowl of popcorn, and watched a football game with Uncle Emmett—that goofball. He could always be counted upon to make sexual innuendos and corny jokes that Nessie usually cracked up at. Next, Nessie read the tragedy of Romeo and Juliet aloud to herself on the couch, to which Edward recited by heart; then, father and daughter then acted out the fight between Tibalt and Mercutio—laughing along as they did.

Finally, there was her mother, who had been out all day. They sat together in the humid attic, looking through photo albums and reminisced, almost as though all those memories happened decades ago when it, honestly, had only been a few years. The tension still hovered over them like red bricks, but it was a nice start.

Tuesday

Sam Uley called to inform the Cullen coven that the golden hind was officially out of the area—she was Jacob's responsibility now. Of course, Sam didn't finish there—he dished out his many sympathies and that the likelihood of Jacob returning was slim to none, 'but if anyone could achieve the impossible with that bonehead, it would be her.' Renesmee could only manage a half-hearted laugh, say goodbye, and then hang up.

Nessie went outside, dressed in a baby blue sweater and jeans, and watched the clear rain drip-drop on to the dirt. It was a hypnotizing sight—the way the precipitation poured heavily down, descending from the content, melancholy sky and then gracefully dip into the ground, making puddle after puddle. The water splashed, leaving rings of ripples to spread far out until they disappeared from her sight—the same way Nessie would like to be. She just stared at the falling water, the thousands of droplets softly hitting the ground. And the day soft of just went on that way; Nessie was engrossed in the rain, watching in from different points of view—the front porch rocking chair, the back porch steps, the window from her bedroom, and then the rooftop.

The rain felt like a million, cold, sharp daggers, each poking her exposed skin, but she preferred to feel the gentle pain; it was better than feeling numb. After awhile, the slow hurt began to ease, finally feeling good. Purifying, like a shower or baptismism. There on the rooftop, she drifted off into a deep sleep, dreaming about that gray day on the road. In her mind, Nessie just continued to gaze beyond her Jacob's tire tracks, long after he was gone.

He would come back from her.

Wednesday.

Somehow, Nessie awoke in her room again, soothed by the sounds of complete silence. For moment upon moment, she just laid there, enjoying herself amongst the yellow linen sheets as though she was resting on a giant cloud. Then, a delectable thought came to mind—Jacob Black—and a fluttering smile smeared across her face. Nessie felt warmth consume her being. And then she remembered that Faethra was long gone, which should have been reason enough to celebrate, but she had only left in pursuit of Jacob. He was gone.

Sighing, Nessie got out of bed and went through her normal morning routine—shower, get dressed, brush her hair and then her teeth—and finally went downstairs for breakfast. It was a pretty normal day after that. She departed from the house and went shopping with her aunts until Nessie's feet were sore, she played video games with Emmett, Edward taught her a new song on the piano, and she sparred a little bit with Jasper.

Life sort of went on as if Jacob Black had never been around, ironically thanks to Jacob.

Everything was normal—predictable—for the rest of the week—for the rest of the month. Nessie was safe amongst her family, albeit there was no one Nessie needed protection from anymore, and she didn't have to be stuck inside all day. She could hunt without worry, or simply go for a run without anyone bothering her. And best of all, nobody was attempting to tell Nessie who she should or should not be in love with.

On the surface, Nessie's life was pretty great. She was smiling, laughing, and having fun, putting on a brave front. Not that acting the part was difficult. Still, there were moments that she wanted to shrink away from the real world and stay in bed for the rest of her life, but everyone was counting on her to be okay—Jacob was counting on her to be okay, even though she wouldn't be. But she pretended nonetheless. She went on like nothing was wrong.

Then, October went by, and then suddenly it was January. Every single day was a year spent in a black and white reality, moments wasted in the shadows of what Nessie truly wanted, but couldn't have.

Wake up.

Get dressed.

Eat breakfast, lunch, and dinner.

Talk to somone.

Talk to almost too many people that didn't seem to care that she utterly bored and breaking.

Her life wasn't empty because Jacob was gone, but she had managed to fall into a routine; her life had a pattern. Along with him had gone her love for adventure and all things new. Everything was plain, dull, and normal.

Normal.

Normal, normal, normal.

And Nessie was fed up with all the normalcies, the facade, and she just couldn't handle it anymore with a sane mind. For days, she stayed locked away in her bedroom and slept, though her dreams always whisked her away, back to the sadness. Faethra was there with her, boasting about how she won, and how Nessie was useless to stop it. Nobody could talk Nessie out of her room, not even Leah, so she decided to accompany Nessie in her room.

Leah sat at the edge of Renesmee's bed, and patted her foot. "Hey there, kiddo."

Lazily glancing over her shoulder, Nessie replied, "Hey," in a deadpanned voice.

"How are you holding up?" Leah inquired, more out of courtesy. Nessie was wrapped up in blankets and sheets, only her pale face could be seen.

"Do you really need to ask?" Nessie grumbled—not in anger, but in exhaustion. She was tired from being tired.

The she-wolf tsked and shrugged sheepishly. "I guess not." Leah scooted up further on the bed. "But, you know, we all thought you were doing really great there for awhile. You were hanging in there just fine, and now you've sequesterd yourself up in here. It's not healthy."

Nessie laughed, void of any good humor. "I don't care, Leah. I hated trying to act like it didn't bother me—like it doesn't bother me, but it does."

"Yeah, I know," Leah nodded, fidgeting with a loose thread on Nessie's blanket until it broke with a sharp snap. "It sucks like crazy to not be loved by the man you love. You tried to keep your chin held high only to crash and burn."

Nessie rolled her eyes, and sat up against the bedpost. "Jee, Leah. You're making me feel so much better."

"Shut up and listen to me," Leah said, knocking Nessie's knees together playfully. "The point I'm trying to make here is that there's no healthy way to cope with heartbreak."

"Heartbreak?" Nessie questioned increduously, the word sounding more like a gross insult than a descriptionof her problem. "Is that what all of this is?" It felt more like an understatement, but still held only as an overstatement.

Lead nodded, her lips shrugging into a half-hearted smile. "Yeah," she sighed. "It's a pain in the ass. Take me, for example. I thought the whole world was to blame for my boyfriend dumping me for my cousin," Leah began with a snort, sliding off the strap of her handbag and placed it in her lap. "I was bitter and cranky on a constant basis. And when I phased for the first time, that's when I realized that not only did I have to be around Sam all the time and follow orders, but I also had to see and hear exactly what he felt about for Emily."

The half-human half-vampire hugged her knees to her chest, and shook her head. "That's the thing though, Leah. Right now, I would kill just to be a rock in Jacob's shoe. I'm dying to know what's going on inside that head of his."

She missed Jacob insanely, her bones rattling nervously, her muscles aching in desperation to be near him again, and her chest felt as though it had a hundred bricks weighed upon it. Her body was constantly aware of his absence, the feeling like a horrible flu. Heartbreak, Leah had called it, this endless burn—no, it was nothing like that. That word seemed to imply that Nessie was incapable of getting up to try again, but she was never without the hope that Jacob would return someday; she didn't lack faith in their love. It couldn't be that she was heartbroken. Although the pain was to much to bear, Nessie was not hollow.

"I would be satisfied just to know that he's okay," Nessie concluded. "Is that pathetic to say?"

"A little, yes," Leah laughed, and began to put her raven locks up into a messy ponytail, "but you're allowed to be a little pathetic. If you want, I could track that blockhead down and kick his sorry ass for you."

"That wouldn't really convince him to come back," Nessie replied, but couldn't help but enjoy the mental image of an angry Leah telling Jacob off—he would have deserved it. "I miss him, Leah," she admitted, and blinked away any oncoming tears, "all the time."

"It's only been a few months, kiddo. There will be plenty of time to heal," Leah assured, popping her knuckles and set her purse on the floor. "Come on. Is Jacob The-Runaway Black really worth all this pain?"

Yes, yes, yes.

Indefinitely, yes.

This was the kind of pain—the kind of love—Nessie had yearned for her entire life. Everyone was always telling Nessie that she was insane for wanting this, for wanting Jacob, but that didn't mean she would even begin to know how to love him any less. It wasn't as if Nessie planned to wallow in woe forever, but was so much to ask to have a small measure of time to simply be sad?

But was Jacob worth it?

Yes.

"Was Sam?" Nessie inquired, arching an eyebrow.

"Eventually," Leah answered, her smile certain and proud. "He's still a good friend to have around in a sticky situation, but it's debatable that what you and Jacob had was different."

Had? Was? Nessie wasn't sure if those past-tenses fit they still had, and still were.

"Different, but not less," the hybrid said, sure that she and Jacob loved each other deeper than Leahand Sam once did.

"All right, so you loved the jerk."

"Love," Nessie corrected without missing a beat. "I love Jacob. I still love him. He's in Seattle, but that doesn't magically make what I feel for him go away."

"I stand corrected," Leah muttered jokingly.

"I never thought it was possible to hurt this much," Nessie whispered, catching a glimpse of the two women in the mirror—one tan, healthy, and beautiful, while the other was a ghostly white, the once vibrant colors in her hair had dulled, and the ever-present smile on her face was lost. "My vision of the world is so distorted without Jacob. It's like I'm looking at things through a shattered eyeglass. I feel like, as long as Jacob is gone, I'm only half of who I am."

She wasn't sure how Jacob could have such an affect on her, how he had this power over her. Nessie had only witnessed three similar before—when Embry forced Quil into going to Florida over the Summer, and poor Claire coincidentally contracted a strange bug until Quil returned, when Paul had been severely nipped by a vampire, Rachel hadn't been well enough to leave the bathroom for a week, and then when Sam had been on the trail of a newborn for two weeks, Emily had quarantined herself to her living room couch. Missing someone, like missing a fragment of your soul, could have a very physical affect on someone, but those had all been the imprint; and Nessie was never like this when Leah was away.

"I'm sorry," Leah grimaced apologetically. "I shouldn't have been so quick to diss your relationship with Jacob. I should have stayed out of the way and kept my mouth shut."

"Leah," Nessie smiled half-heartedly, shaking her head, "you don't have to apologize."

"Actually, I do," Leah snorted, combing her copper digits through her feathery, black hair. "I was a jealous bitch."

Nessie frowned, pursing her lips in rememberance of their miniature tiffs in those two weeks. Leah had behaved coldly toward Jacob, always stepping in when they were about to share a moment, and was determined to convince Nessie that Jacob would inevitably make a run for it. And really, was she wrong? "You were trying to warn me, Leah. That's what best friends are fo. Besides, you have known Jacob much longer than I have. You probably know him better, too."

The Quileute woman laughed heartily at her imprint's ridiculousness. "Honey, there is nobody is in this damn world that knows Jacob, not even himself, better than you do. I have literally been inside Jake's head, and all I ever got to know about him was how much of a girl he was over Bella. And Bella!" Leah exclaimed sardonically, emitting a high-pitched guffaw. "She could never figure him out, no matter how much she tried. It must have taken Jacob a couple of weeks to fall in love with her, and they had already known of each other for years. With you, it only took Jacob a couple of seconds to fall in love."

"I know," Nessie agreed, shifting around on the bed, and lifted down the blanket to reveal her pile of wild, auburn tendrils. "I know that Jacob loves me."

"A lot," Leah added."

"Not enough to stay and be happy," the half-human half-vampire exhaled sharply, trying to fix her hair.

"But enough to leave and be miserable," Leah countered, somewhat kidding. "Jacob loves you enough to let you go, to give you your best chance without him."

"Faethra. . ."

"At least she's gone now."

"I wish," Nessie mumbled grumpily, rolling her eyes. "Faethra is more here than ever."

Everywhere Jacob wasn't, Faethra was. It didn't matter that Faethra was only hunting Jacob now, she had suceeded, it was evident in Jacob's continued absence. Her golden face still haunted Nessie in her dreams, that voice taunting her, and Nessie wasn't sure if she could take much more of it; but she wasn't certain if the golden hind was using their mysterious mental connection, or if the nightmares were Nessie's own creation.

"Is she still giving you nightmares?" Leah asked.

"I don't know. I don't know if she's still in my head or if I'm insane. All I know is that the dreams feel more real, but I think it's because she's winning," Nessie retorted.

"But she's not," Leah said.

"Yes, she is," Nessie insisted matter-of-factually, pursing her lips and let out a sharp breath. "Part of Faethra's goal was to split Jacob and I apart, but she's not going to stop until one of us is dead." Jacob knew that for a fact, and he was, in turn, going to make sure he would be Faethra's main target. "But I am not going to give up on Jacob."

"Why?" Leah questioned in genuine perplexity, bemused by Renesmee's devotion. "Is he really that special to you?"

"Of course."

"Hold on to that," the woman shape-shifter advised warmly. "Love like that is truly rare and you need to fight."

"I wish Jacob knew that as well as you do," Renesmee said, cracking a microscopic smile.

"I reckon deep down that Jacob realizes he would be and will be ordering room service in that Heartbreak Hotel," Leah joking, teasingly punching Nessie's shoulder, who mock-groaned as if it hurt.

"That was the worst Elvis reference I've ever heard," Renesmee snorted, rolling her eyes.

Leah scrunched up her nose. "Sorry."

"It's all right."

Huffing out a long sigh, the half-breed's legs slid down the length of the mattress—at a loss for words. As a person who was typically brought joy to others, moping around wasn't in her nature, but Jacob truly brought an unhappiness in her soul that Nessie had never known before. In an odd way, she was sort of grateful to him for that. For the past three days, Nessie was paralyzed—her body stapled to her bed, her brownless irises forever staring at every last corner of her bedroom and then the ceiling. Each member of her family had tried to talk Renesmee out of her depression, probably terrified she would be like this for the next six months and that she would eventually fling herself into a raging, cold ocean—pull an outright Bella. And what if Nessie did? Her mother didn't invent devastation.

Honestly, she just didn't want to be anywhere near four blissfully married couples—the hugging, the kissing, living out their happily ever afters. It wasn't as if she begrudged any of them for securing love, but when she was incurably miserable, she couldn't but feel a strange jealousy balling up in the pit of her stomach. And Nessie couldn't go back to the First Beach cliffs to think. They belonged to her _and_ Jacob now; being there would be wrong without him.

Moments passed between the shape-shifter and her imprint where some words were better left unspoken.

"It's okay to hurt," Leah murmured gently as Nessie leaned in exhaustively and rested her head upon her best friend's lap. "There's no reason to be ashamed of hurting."

"It really seems this is going to be impossible to survive," Nessie retorted, shaking her head. "How do I do it, Leah?"

"I don't know," Leah responded wearily, threading her warm fingertips through the younger girl's tangled hair, "but I do know that you will, squirt. You're going to charge through the grief and both of you are going to be okay. You want to know why?"

"Sure. Why?"

"Because you are one of the lucky ones," she replied honestly, pressing their foreheads together.

"What do you mean?" Nessie asked.

"I mean. . . I know that with all of these happy couples around you, it seems the love bug has left you out of the mix, but there are billions of people who desperately want what you and Jacob have," Leah clarified, tenderly grasping on Nessie's wrists. "As long as you want it enough, everything is going to fall into place."

"Believe me, Leah, I do," Nessie whispered, vowing so.

"See? I promise you, Nessie, things are gonna turn out fine," Leah said. She sounded like a concerned mother.

Renesmee feigned a gasp, quickly sitting up with her eyes widened and her mouth agape. "Leah. . . Did you just call me Nessie?"

"Eh, what can I say?" Leah shrugged casually. "It's a cute nickname, even if it is linked to a fictional sea monster."

The half-human half-vampire girl cocked an eyebrow, "Agree to disagree," and she went on, "I think the name really started out as a lame insult, but then grew into a compliment."

"Jacob loved you from the start, and I suppose you did, too," Leah thought aloud, brushing her nails over her chin.

"Mhmm," Renesmee hummed in confirmation. "Yes, well. . . I don't know anymore. I think I fell in love with Jacob before I met him." Before their encounter in the cafe. She had always been fond of him in some way, always ready for the chance to get to know him. Nessie couldn't have anticipated they would be dragged into this tornado of chaos, but she must have always been willing to go through it with him. "Or I was meant to be in love with him. Not that any of that matters now."

"It matters to you," Leah stated, frowning in confusion.

"I just can't stop thinking about Jacob," Nessie admitted, criss-crossing her legs. "I keep wondering if he's all right. I want to know if he's as torn up inside as I am." If at all. "I want to know if another girl is keeping him company." Especially in bed. "I want to know if I ever cross his mind. But more than anything, I want to know that he's safe."

"Of all the times a person would need a crystal ball."

"Leah. . ."

"Nessie. . ."

"I must be a real brat sometimes, especially to you," Nessie started, touched by her best friend's concern. "Look, you really don't need to be up here consoling me, but it really means the world to me that you are. Now, let's talk more about you. What's up?"

"You're a sweet kid," Leah remarked, flopping one of Renesmee's copper coils over her shoulder. "Really. But I don't wanna talk about me. Trust me, the healing process is a whole lot smoother to take when you have a good buddy to bitch with, and you're not really the loner type. More importantly, you've been there for me plenty of times. Need I remind you of the disaster date from hell with Larry the Zookeeper?"

Leah was pretty satisfied being a single woman, but she still went out on dates often enough, secure a short relationship, and didn't always feel the need to rely on battery-powered devices to get her kicks, but she had been out with her fair share of duds. Larry the Zookeeper was one of the worst. He had a mild obsession with earwax, was a pervert, and made a hobby out of flossing her teeth with his own hair. While he and Leah had been out to eat, Nessie disguised herself as a waitress, showed off some leg, and distracted him long enough for Leah to get a clean get away. The consequence, however, was that Larry took on a new attraction toward Nessie, and Edward had to step in on that shannigan.

"No," Nessie giggled.

"Exactly," Leah replied, nodding confidently. "Thanks to you, I've gotten through a lot of tough times. I've also managed to avoid a lot of tough times thanks to you." She raised her forehead from Nessie's, smiling down at the girl. "So, you don't have to be brave for me."

"Thank you, Leah," Nessie murmured, drawing back.

"Don't mention it."

"You're just a big softy, aren't you?"

"Only around you."

"I love you."

"I love you, too," Leah said, digging through her handbag. "Well, small fry, are you ready to move on to phase two of the moping process?"

"Depends," the hybrid answered, though it sounded more like a question. "What does phase two pertain?"

"Ice cream!" Leah sang out excitedly, pulling out a container filled with one of Nessie's favorite favorite deserts.

The teenager-adult squealed in delight as Leah handed her a spoon. "Layered strawberry and vanilla ice cream with banana slices and chocolate chips. . . Are you trying to make me fat?"

Leah mock-glared, quickly tossing away the lid. "Duh! You could use some more flab on those flimsy bones."

"You have a point," Nessie playfully shrugged, dragging her index finger over the top center of the mountain of the creamy goodness, and then stuck it in her mouth. "Mmm, so good!"

"Atta girl," Leah urged as they dug in. "How exactly did you come up with it?"

"Hmm," Nessie hummed, tapping the tip of her spoon against her chin in thought, trying to recall a memory that signified her love for this particular dish, but drew a blank. "I don't remember. I was just craving it one day and I fell in love."

"Good, though," Leah commented, shoveling through the ice cream hungrily. "You're a genius."

"Yeah, right. If I was anything close to a genius, I would have already figured out a way to get Jacob to stay," the youngest of the two women mumbled, furrowing an eyebrow.

"Girl, you could use all the sense and credibility in the world, but it's not his style," Leah replied, teasingly flicking her wrist.

"Do you remember when you said you don't know Jacob as well?"

"How could I forget? It was only two minutes ago."

"But you still predicted that he would run away from me when the going got rough. . . You were right." Nessie scraped her spoon over the surface of the pink ice cream.

Leah grimaced apologetically. "I didn't want to be right. I would never hope for someone to hurt you," she said tilting her head. "On the other hand, I don't think you would ever stop loving someone just because another person tells you to stop."

"Right again," Nessie nodded, taking a large spoonful of ice cream into her mouth. "I can't stop loving Jacob, even if I wanted to. I love him. This is the once in a lifetime love I've been wishing for my entire life."

"Careful what you wish for you," Leah warned, mockingly jutting out her lower lip in a pout.

"No," Nessie retorted in a solid tone. "I'm just going to work harder."

"Awesome," Leah said, pulling out a can of whipped crème and offered some to her imprint. "Want some?"

* * *

><p><em>Whilst taking a friendly stroll through the woods after a long hunt, Renesmee picked up a small stone and said to Jacob, "Right through those two trees, into the bush, over the branch, and back in my hand." She wound up her arm and tossed through the rock its many destinations until it was back in the palm of her hand. "Tadaaa!"<em>

"_Oh, get over yourself," Jacob grumbled, rolling his eyes. He picked up a slightly bigger rock and took on a cocky stance. "Easy."_

"_Then, please," the four year-old half-breed giggled indulgently, and slid a foot back. "Show me how it's done, Alpha-man."_

_Jacob smirked, confident that he could do it just as well she did. He stretched out his arm, and pitched the rock between the two, small spruce trunks. It hit a branch, stretching it back like a rubberband, and then the rock came flying toward Jacob, smacking him right on the cheek. The power of the hit sent him down, his back on the ground. He groaned in pain. Nessie burst out laughing, leaning against a tree to keep from toppling over—and stood there, with her stomach clutched in her arms, laughing at him for a straight four minutes. After her recovery, she extended a hand to him and helped Jacob up._

"_You are so smooth," Nessie spluttered between breathless giggles._

"_It's moments like this I remember exactly why I've never been out on a date," Jacob muttered, soothing the pain in his cheek._

"_What do you mean you've never been out on a date?" Nessie exclaimed, astounded by this new fact._

"_Just that," the shape-shifter shrugged nonchalantly. "I've never been out on a date."_

"_No way!" Nessie giggled, shaking her head to and fro. "You're twenty-three years-old, Jacob. Those stats are not allowed."_

"_What're you? My dad?" Jacob chuckled, as the two continued their walk._

"_But there's nothing wrong with you!" Nessie yipped giddily._

_Jacob quirked a dark eyebrow, blatantly caught off-guard. "Huh?"_

"_Well, I mean. . ." Renesmee trailed off, a cerise blush tinting her cheeks. Where her own age was considered, the half-breed was now the size of a fourteen year-old girl, and she was beginning to see why Jacob got so much attention from other girls. Not only was he fun to be around, she had to (inwardly) admit that he was quite easy on the eyes. "As guys go, you're attractive. Charming."_

"_Thank you?" Jacob tilted his head._

"_Come on," Nessie murmured, bashfully swirling a finger through an autumn-colored curl. "I've been out with you to restaurants, gas stations, and shopping forums. Girls are always drooling all over you, and not all of them are clueless. One of them could be the future Misses Jacob Black." She teasingly preened at him. "You could have a bundle of cute, little, mini-Jake puppies!"_

_Jacob slanted the side of his mouth, showing off a dimple. "I doubt it."_

"_Well, it wouldn't hurt to date someone," Nessie replied, rolling her eyes._

"_Why is it so important to you?" he queried, crossing his arms._

_Nessie swallowed shyly, intrigued by the way the muscles in his forearms strained. Her heartbeat faltered, thudding painfully and her stomach fluttered. It didn't make sense that Jacob was girlfriendless; he was a total. . . hunk._

"_Because I don't want to see my best friend die alone," she answered._

"_You sure do know what to say to make a guy feel better," he commented sarcastically. _

"_Jacob, what's wrong?" Renesmee asked, tuggingly gingerly at his wrists. "You are an absolute catch—charming, handsome, funny, and you have a great should let yourself meet a beautiful woman, fall in love, and have me be a bride's maid at the wedding."_

"_I will not," Jacob replied softly. "I don't want any of that."_

"_Why not?"_

"_I'm pretty satisfied with the way my life is going right now," the man-wolf replied honestly. His head tilted forward, their eyes locked, and she knew that he specifically meant her. "I don't want some emotional, tanning-when-she-should-be-swimming girl to mess that up."_

"_It's the whole wolf thing, isn't it?"_

"_Oh, god."_

"_I understand that you don't want to freak some other girls out, but you have to take a chance sometime," Nessie said, transmitting a thousand images of her best friend dining with a blank-faced woman, the couple spending all night talking and laughing. "Don't let your inner beast spoil your chances at true love."_

"_That isn't the problem."_

"_Sure it isn't," she chortedly teasingly, swinging Jake's arm back and forth. "But if it is, we can always find someone of a supernatural persuasion for you. Nahuel has a ton of sisters that are just like me."_

"_For some reason," Jacob began with a snort, releasing Nessie's hand and leaned in, giving her the type of smile that said he knew something that she didn't. "I doubt it."_

"_Is that supposed to be a compliment?" Renesmee questioned, lowering her eyebrow in feigned suspicion._

"_Sure," Jacob grinned wolfishly and winked, "let's go with that."_

_Stamping a foot and popping out a newly formed, sharp hip, Nessie stuck her nose in the air and pretended to be offended. "What does that mean, jerk?"_

"_Nothing. There's just nobody out there quite like you," Jacob replied, his tone soaked in sarcasm, but Nessie knew that Jacob thought that she was one of a kind._

_She beamed at him. "I hate you."_

_Chuckling softly, Jacob shook his head. "Whatever. Have you even considered what it would mean for our friendship if I got a girlfriend?"_

"_No," Nessie answered truthfully._

"_No normal girl, and no abnormal girl for that matter, is going to be just dandy about the fact that my best friend is a four year-old girl," Jacob told her, gesturing up at and down at her. _

"_I'm fourteen," Nessie replied deadpanned, with a slight glower. _

"_Same difference," Jacob said, rolling his eyes. "My point is there's no way any girl is going to tolerate our kind of friendship. That means we would have less time to spend together."_

_Sighing, the half-human half-vampire contemplated his opposition. After all, he was _her_ Jacob, that had been part of their dynamic for the past four and half years now, but she knew that Jacob was meant to have love in his life someday; she couldn't keep him all to herself forever, right?_

_And then, she was struck with a brilliant idea. "Let me set you up on a blind date."_

"_You have gotta be kidding me," he laughed._

"_Just this once?"_

"_No."_

"_Please?"_

"_No."_

"_Pretty please?"_

"_Okay. Let me think about it. Hell, no!"_

"_What do I have to say to convince you?"_

"_I don't know," Jacob retorted, rubbing the back of his head. "I just want to hang out on a Friday night with pizza and my best friend."_

_His devotion to her was quite touching, and that's why he would eventually give into her wants. She gave him a puppy-dog expression and pleaded gently, "Please, Jacob? For me? If I fail you, I'll find some way to make it up to you. I promise."_

"_It really means that much to you, doesn't it, Nessie?" Jacob questioned softly, smiling as though he was entertained by her. _

"You_ mean that much to me," Nessie smirked, laying the sweetness on thick. "Let me be your matchmaker?"_

_Jacob could only stare at Nessie for a few moments, deciding, and finally heaved a defeated sigh. "Fine. All right. I give. You win."_

_The hybrid's face lit up, her feet bouncing up and down. "Oh, thank you, Jacob! You're the best! I will not let you down!"_

"_You could never let me down," Jacob replied, amused._

_. . ._

_For four days, Renesmee sat in her room, trying to think up a list of girls that would suit Jacob perfectly. There was Nahuel's older sister, Jenny, but she lacked a sense of humor and believed that sarcasm was unladylike. There was Maggie from the Irish coven, but Jacob would probably never go out with a 'smelly leech.' Then, there was Leah Clearwater, Jacob's beta. To Nessie, they made sense. They were both headstrong, stubborn, sarcastic, but could exhibit warm personalties when anyone would give them enough patience. So, she called Leah—many times—and eventually convinced her to go on a blind date._

"_Okay, where is this so-called tall, dar, and handsome guy you've been blabbing so much about?" Leah questioned sharply, already seated at one of the outside tables of the restaurant. Jacob was twenty minutes late, and the two girls were getting anxious. _

"_I don't know," Nessie answered honestly, tapping one heel against the cobblestone. "He said he would be here."_

"_He had better be," Leah snarled in frustration. "I refuse to face the embarrasement of being stood up by one of your imaginary friends."_

_Nessie took in a deep breath to keep from getting her feelings hurt or from scratching Leah's hair out. Although, she was nearly certain that Leah didn't exactly hate her, she was sure that Leah didn't much like her either. "Trust me, Clearwater. You two will get along swimmingly," she replied in her characteristic, cheerful disposition._

"_Ugh," Leah groaned, rubbing small circles into her small circles. "Do you always have to be so damn perky?"_

"_Do you always have to be so depressing?"_

"_I'm not depressing. I'm realistic."_

"_Your version of reality is a little disheartening."_

"_Oh, boo-hoo!"_

"_You should consider having a big, bright lightbulb carefully shoved up your," Nessie censored herself as a little girl skipped by, "personality." Then, she caught wind of Jacob's beach scent and knew that she had to scurry away. "Oops! He's here! Tata! Good luck!" She strided like lightning over to a bush, not too far away but not too close, plotting to spy on them for the first few minutes of their date, just to see that all was going well._

_Jacob walked up, searching the restaurant for table eight. He was dressed in a navy blue, buttoned dress-shirt and black jeans, deliberately dapper. (Oh, he was such a gorgeous man!) He chuckled, his eyebrows cocked. "Leah?"_

"_Jacob?" Leah inquired, mirroring his incredulous tone. _

"_Leah?" He laughed again, this time more reluctantly. "Tell me she didn't set us up on a blind date."_

"_Ew."_

"_Same here."_

"_She is a real sport, though," Leah smiled fondly, scrunching up her napkin in a ball and tossed it aside. "Cute kid."_

"_Yeah,"Jacob agreed whole-heartedly, grinning ear-to-ear to himself. "She tried. I can't blame her for that."_

"_True," his beta nodded. "I like her spunk, but don't tell her I said that."_

_Jacob shrugged casually. "I don't have to."_

"_What?" Leah questioned._

_He leaned over to Leah, his eyes mischeviously flickering to Nessie's hiding place. "Because you just did."_

"_Oh. Should we indulge her for awhile?"_

"_Don't take this the wrong way, Leah, but I would rather not spend a Friday night with you," he told her, not too willing to chill with her._

_Leah arose from the table. "That's okay. At least now I can go home and watch Xena. See ya later, Jacob."_

"_Later, Leah." He waved disinterestly as she left, and heaved an amused sigh. Jacob walked over to the bush, and offered his hand to her. "You can come out now. Hiding in a bush cannot be very comfortable."_

_Nessie nodded once, mumbling under her breath, "It's really not."_

"_Come on. Take my hand," Jacob smiled gently and she accepted, brushing the dust off her jeans as she stepped out._

"_I can't believe that didn't work. You two didn't even give each other a chance."_

"_Take my word for this, Nessie," Jacob began, crossing his arms, "Leah and I would make the suckiest couple. Why the heck would you set me up with her?"_

_The half-human half-vampire girl furrowed an eyebrow, shyly glancing at her shoes. "I don't know. Both of you seem so similar. I thought it made sense."_

"_If I were into sense, I wouldn't be friends with you, would I?" He jokingly waggled his eyebrows at her, grinning. _

"_Hmm, touche," Nessie smiled back. "At least you showed up."_

"_A promise is a promise," Jacob said, teasingly tugging at Renesmee's pocket. "I'm a man of my word."_

"_That you are," the four year-old agreed, resting a hand over his. "So, how shall I make this up to you?"_

"_You already did."_

"_What? I did?"_

"_Yeah, you did."_

"_Really? How? What did I do?"_

"_You gave me a good memory that I'm going to laugh at a week from now," Jacob replied light-heartedly, their fingers gently entwined. "Thanks."_

_She shook her hand free, planting her fists on her hips. "I'm pleased that you find my failure so entertaining."_

"_Oh, don't go all teenager on me," Jacob chuckled, shaking his head._

"_I just want you to be happy, Jacob."_

"_What makes you think I'm not happy?"_

"_The lack of girlfriend."_

"_I don't need a girlfriend to be happy."_

"_Are you sure you aren't gay?" Nessie giggled, gently nudging his elbow._

"_Haha," Jacob laughed dryly. "You know, Nessie, one of these days you're going to make some lucky guy a very confused boyfriend."_

_A smirk dressed her lips, her features smug. "Good."_

_The Quileute snorted, rolling his eyes. "Okay, how about you and I go out for a night on the town?" Jacob suggested, warmly brushing a leaf of Nessie's shoulder. "Unfortunately in Forks, that means going out for ice cream."_

_A glowing emer_

_Burning hot_

_Burning slow_

_Deep within I'm shaken by the violence_

_Of existing only for you_

_I know I can't be with you_

_I do what I have to do_

_I know I can't be with you_

_I do what I have to do_

_And I have the sense to recognize_

_But I don't know how to let you go_


	48. Gone Away

**Disclaimer: Nothing belongs to me. Don't sue! Song by Lucy Shwarts!**

_I've been finding puzzle pieces _

_Of us_

_Kept in the dust_

_I've been finding letters_

_And photograph frames_

_To forget your name_

_I've been tracing my steps in fingerprint clues_

_And clips of the news_

_And wondering why in our lives_

_The wind calls our names_

_Never the same_

For five more days, Renesmee could think of no better way to waste time than spending it locked up inside of her bedroom with tubs of delicious ice cream. Her Grandmother Esme would slip a plate of food under the slit of the half-breed's door, to she would gently laugh and insist that her grandmother could come in. Nessie was quickly cheering up, though not quite back to her old self.

Finally, on Saturday, she emerged from her lonesome sanctuary when her ears filled with the sweet sound of her father's nimble fingers dancing across the ivory keys. She followed the trail of the clever musical notes, down to where her father sat on his black-wood bench as he played her lullabye. Nessie watched absentmindedly, mesmerized by the vivid music, as she leaned her head against the wall. She enjoyed the soft sounds, soothed by it and put at ease. Humming along with the lovely song, Edward motioned her over and permitted her to croon with him.

Not too long later, afternoon rolled around. Nessie's muscles ached to be in motion, to be put to work, and to be usedful. She wanted to do something to relieve the rattling in her bones. Thus, the hybrid sought her ex-soldier uncle, Jasper, for one of their normal sparring sessions that they used to have before Jacob came along. But Jasper was reluctant when Nessie came to him, exchanging a nervous glance with Alice before she made up an excuse to flitter off—always feeling the need to shop.

Alone, uncle and niece sat outside in a Takoma clearing. Jasper sat on a boulder, regailing Nessie of the viscous battle between Victoria's newborn army and a never before seen alliance amongst the Quileute wolves and vampires. Although Nessie had listened to the story more than a thousand times and could easily recite it by heart, she never grew tired of the fascinating recount; but this time, Jasper deliberately left out certain details that would have sent Nessie's imagination in a whirlwind of fancy.

He did not tell Nessie of the russet wolf charging through a crowd of dangerous newborn vampires, slaughtering two, maybe even three, at a time for the purpose of protecting Bella; he did not tell Nessie of that same wolf's heroic instincts to defend Leah, his pack sister; he did not tell Nessie of the would-be Alpha's willing heart, to sacrifice his life to a vampire's venom for the safety of his family—because Jacob was loyal, and always there for those truly in need.

Nessie glanced down, resting at the base of the tree, and tossed a leaf aside. "I'm not a little girl, you know. I don't need you to protect me from the J-word."

Jasper nodded, stretching out his fingers and rubbed his knees. "Are you sure that you're up for this? It's been a while."

"Positive," she answered solemnly, arising from the ground. "I can't be defenseless."

"Sure you can," Jasper countered impishly, also getting up. "There is no longer fear of attack. Faethra is gone."

"So what?" Nessie questioned, her voice slightly raised in irritation. "That does not mean she'll stay gone forever, or that there aren't other dangers out there."

"Fair enough," he said, lifting his hands defensively. "I just don't want you to do this for the alone purpose of letting off some steam. You still need to be able to keep your head clear and your mind focused."

"Sure, sure," Nessie said disinterestedly. "I'm remember. Let's just start."

"Sure thing, Ren, but don't wrongly pressure yourself or distract yourself."

"Whatever. I got it. We both know that one of these days I'm going to beat you," she smirked confidently.

"Pfft," Jasper chortled mockingly. "Yeah, right. That'll be the day."

"Just throw the first punch, sucker, and I'll show you what I'm really made of," Renesmee challenged, arching an eyebrow.

"You got it."

Jasper raised his arm in the air, his elbow bent, and threw his balled hand at Nessie's cheek. Immediately, Nessie took a few steps back, trapping her uncle's fist in both of her hands and twisted it around until she heard the subtle crunch of his fingers. Jasper, in response, pulled his arm, his strength forcing Nessie to move along with him, and tossed her into the air. The youngest Cullen emitted a hoarse grunt, feeling a soft twinge shoot up her spine when she hit a tree.

She crouched down low to the ground, launching herself upward, and hooked her arms around a sturdy branch, as Jasper charged toward her. Nessie's first instinct was to swing her legs and kick him in the face, but the malicious golden hue of her uncle's eyes elicited a familiar fear within her stomach; and thus, during her distraction, Jasper roughly grabbed her ankled and slammed Nessie down. Softly grunting, Nessie scooted away, her weight resting on her left hand as she crawled.

"What are you doing?" Jasper demanded, partially taunting Renesmee for her weakness, as he chuckled darkly.

Nessie glanced over her shoulder at the familiar sound of sinister laughter—the same laughter from her nightmares—bemused by the bizarre glower within his eyes, and momentarily saw the flicker of the golden hind. She closed her eyes, images of rain, gold, and Jacob overflowed, and her strength rejuvenated. The half-vampire arose from the ground, the human side suppressed, and she made a mad run for it. Her feet carried her far, hopefully to safety. Thankfully, with every ounce of attitude aimed at her father, Nessie seemed to inherit Edward's speed, and she hid.

"You can't hide forever!" Jasper called menacingly.

"I don't intend to," Nessie murmured darkly.

She extended a leg forward, pounding her foot into Jasper's chest, and easily sent him flying backward. Renesmee smirked, satisfied by the sound of his moans woven from pain. Poor thing. Then, they swung at each other, and legs and arms were lost in a tizzy. When determination struck, Nessie's movements were as swift as a fire, but flowed him like water.

But something in her ankle pulsated and a salty shot charged up her leg; and against, she fell. She shrieked out a silent cry, kicking the ground in frustration.

"What now?" the empath laughed, and she realized that he had been controlling her emotions—the stinging pain—to his advantage, as Faethra probably would. He was trying to teach her to be stronger.

"I'm taking a break," she answered between breathless pants, clutching her foot.

"Do you really think that someone who is trying to kill you would give you a break?" he asked, roughly stepping down on her injured ankle.

Nessie grimaced and hissed. She slammed her heel against his chin, and freed herself. "If they know what's good for them."

Jasper grinned, impressed. "Good, good."

Rage, her own rage, overwhelmed her senses, and through a quickly unraveling series of defensive manuevers, Renesmee got her ankles around Jasper's neck, and was nearly ready to twist; but he dashed forward, and fell on top of her.

"We're done," Jasper stated while getting up from the ground, soothing the pain from his neck.

"What?" she inquired, surprised.

"Yes. That's enough for today."

"What? Why? No!" Nessie shouted, copping an attitude. "Let's keep going."

"No, Renesmee," Jasper said in a low tone, as if he was her father. "I said that we need to stop, and you need to rest."

"I don't. I'm fine. I can keep going. No problem," she assured him in frustration.

"Listen to me, Renesmee. . ." he told her.

But she already knew what he was going to say—the reason why she was so impulsive today. "No, I can't."

"You had better," Jasper warned.

Her jaw tightened. "Say whatevr you're going to say, and get it over with."

"He's not going to come back, no matter what you do," Jasper said, no shades of doubt in his eyes, but what the hell did he knew? He couldn't be accused of knowing anything substantial about Jacob, or her relationship with him.

Then again, Jasper was an empath. He could easily feed of doubt—her doubt.

"You're wrong," Nessie replied, snarled. She drew back, glowering with flames flickering through her milk chocolate irises, and turned around. "You know Jacob, and you don't know us."

"No, Renesmee! Wait!" Jasper yelled. "Ren, don't walk away mad!"

"Don't even tell me how to walk away or what to feel right now, you Civil War redneck!" Renesmee hissed in response, storming off deeper in the woods.

Jasper didn't attempt to follow after her, nor did she want anyone to disturb her. And so, Nessie, after marching around in the forest back and forth for a half hour, stopped and stood still. She balled her fists at her sides and let out a high-pitched wail, punching her fist into a boulder until it rested as grains in the dirt.

"How dare you leave me!" Renesmee screamed, flinging her arms and legs at trees, rocks, and bushes—destroying that section of the forest. "How dare you leave me alone! Jacob! I need you! Please, come back. . . I need you! Please, come back! _Ugh_!" She shouted, her voice shattering to pieces, as she crumbled to ground and cried.

. . .

Eventually, Renesmee needed to return home, when Bella kept on texting and calling for her daughter, loudly expressing her anxiety. There, in her room, Nessie sat upon her bed in boredom. She flipped through the dusty pages of old Christmas-present books, texted back and forth with her best friend, and browsed through the internet—activities human teenagers would partake in—and finally gave up with trying to entertain herself. Nessie shrugged on a large sweatshirt, changed into a pair of sweatpants, and merely glared at the wall.

While doodling random patterns on her knees, there came a gentle knock from the opposite side of the door.

"Come in. The door is open," she said in a deadpanned voice.

Her father timidly opened the bedroom door, as it made the slightest squeak, and then stepped in. Nessie averted her eyes away from her knees, and looked upon her seventeen-going-on-one-hundred-ten dad. A polite smile spread across her shell-pink mouth, when she thought of how she looked a year older than him. She realized how bizarre that would appear to most people, but bizarre was a Cullen's speciality. For them, it was fitting.

Edward crossed his arms over his mid-torso area, and leaned casually against the door frame. "Hey, how are you doing?"

Renesmee shrugged. "I don't know yet. I'm not terrible."

"That's good," the vampire commented. He walked on over to the wicker chair at his daughter's bedside, and took a seat. He grinned warmly upon her, stroking a middle finger through one Nessie's wild, reddish-brownish curls. "It's nice to see your lovely face again."

"I'm sorry, Daddy," the youthful hybrid replied sincerely. "I didn't mean to frighten anybody."

"Yes, I know, but you certainly managed to do so," Edward said, withdrawing his hand from her hair.

"I just needed some time to myself, away from everybody else—to think and get some perspective," Nessie elucidated genuinely—not sorry that she had distanced herself from her own family, but sorry she had worried them in the process.

"I understand, baby girl," Edward replied, no traces of resentment on his face.

And she knew why. He, of all people, should have been the last person to judge her; he was actually able to sympathize her current situation, and even empathize with Jacob. He had once shut out his family, trapped in the prison of her self-inflicted misery for the love of a human girl.

"Thanks, Daddy," Renesmee nodded, hugging her knees to her chest.

"Jasper informed of your temper tantrum from this afternoon," Edward told her.

"It was not a temper tantrum," the half-breed stated irritadely, rolling her eyes. She had walked off, after all, before she could say anything she would live to regret. Jasper was the one who would one day eat his words after being unfair.

"That's not what he made it sound like."

"Then, he made is sound wrong."

"Renesmee, you have always been a calm and collected person."

"Maybe I'm sicked and tired of always being a calm and collected person."

"That Jacob Black really inspires the worst out of you," Edward said, giving Nessie a lopsided grin as if to amuse her. "Stubborn and bold."

"Well," Renesmee began wearily, kicking the blankets away from her feet. "No one is perfect."

"No, no, no," the man-vampire started, waving his hand at her to make her understand. "I do not mean to discourage this behavior. Love isn't always meant to be rainbows and sunshine, long walks on the beach, and sunsets."

Sunrises, the half-human half-vampire mused to herself, and imagined her in Jacob's arms again.

"Really?" Nessie inquired shyly.

"Don't sound so astonished, sweetheart," Edward chortled lightly. "It was not so long ago that your mother and I were putting ourselves through perilous events and unneccesary hell." Yes, she recalled much of her parents' love stories as well. Right now, she was far from being in the correct mood to want to heart it all over again, especially the parts with her mother and Jacob. "However, I believe that's it's a given that no father is ever pleased to see their daughter going through so much pain. It tends to make one feel powerless. I won't lie to you—I would like to kick that puppy's behind if I could, but I don't think you would let me."

Nessie nodded in confirmation, addind, "You would have to get through me first."

"And I would surely lose," he chuckled playfully.

"Why are you the only one in this family that has any faith in me?" she queried—reminded of how Bella, from the beginning, was probably plotting to send Jacob away, how Leah predicted he would go back to Seattle, and how Jacob, more than anyone else, was willing to throw her away in fear of Faethra.

"That's not true."

"Yes, it is."

"The others are a shade more cynical about the relationship you two share. They fail to understand," Edward deliberated, ever-ready to defend his wife's reluctance to accept Jacob. "It's your boyfriend everyone lacks faith in."

As if that would make her feel better.

"You already know what I think about Jacob." That he's everything she wanted, needed, and was hoping to thrive on. He would come back to her—either the following day or a thousand years from now, she could wait, because he loved her, too. It was only a matter of time.

"I do," Edward nodded, "but I don't need to be a mind-reader or an empath to know how he makes you feel. I see it."

"Thank you, Daddy. To hear you saying these things means the worldto me. I love you," Nessie said, tenderely smiling.

"I love you more, baby girl," Edward retorted, and arose from the seat to give her a quick kiss on the forehead.

"I hope you don't take this the wrong way, but what exactly are you doing up here?" Renesmee questioned, though not in the intention of being rude or unappreciative.

"While you and Jasper were sparring earlier today, Charlie dropped by the house." Edward pulled out a small notebook from the pocket of his jacket; it was his father's journal. "You accidentally left it in his care."

"Oh," Nessie mutteredly awkwardly, "I. . ." She wanted to apologize for finding it, for not showing him the journal immediately, for almost leaving it lost at Charlie's.

"It's okay," Edward interrupted, reading her mind. "Where did you find it?"

"In the fireplace at the old house," Nessie retorted nervously, uncertain of how he would react to his father's memories being forgotten in rubble and ash. "I had been reading it."

"Have you found anything interesting yet?" Edward inquired, handing over the journal.

"Kinda," Renesmee replied with a nonchalant shrug. "I suppose it is nice to know a few things about my biological grandparents," she mumbled in a low tone, hoping Carlisle and Esme weren't listening from downstairs. "Did you ever read it?"

"I skimmed over a few details a few times after Carlisle turned me. My father and I weren't too close, but I was curious to know more about him—his thoughts on law, my mother, and myself," Edward confessed, sharply frowning. "The most valuable thing I learned between those pages is that he was a good man who cherished his family as I cherish mine; but now, I leave his thoughts in your care, my daughter." He emitted an exaggerated sigh. "Here, you enjoy it. Let me know how you like it."

"Okie dokie. I will. Thank you again, Daddy."

With that Edward, her vampire father, left Renesmee alone with Edward Senior's personal thoughts. She gazed upon the dusty, tattered cover of the notebook. Renesmee rested the object in her lap, carefully opening its ancient pages for her eyes to see. She couldn't help to want to know more about all the secrets inside, about the love her grandfather must have shared with her grandmother—a love story Nessie knew the minimum about.

Oh, on this night it was secrets Nessie thirsted for; thus, she received—in fact, some secrets she came across was more than she bargained for.

* * *

><p><em>June 28th, 1899<em>

_Dear Journal,_

_It has taken me an entire fortnight to muster up any courage frommy system, so that I may finally enquire my lovely lady friend, the sweet Elizabeth Monroe, to spend the rest of our lives together. There is not a moment in my routine life where she is absent from my thoughts, from my heart, and from my daydreams. _

_How could I possibly be this enthralled by a singular woman when my own father was a secret adulterer? He loved, and still loves, a multitude of women, that could possibly put the petty needs of mythological gods to shame, and it was always believed I would follow in that man's footsteps—to marry a young chicky that would obey every last of my whims and give me sons to carry on the family name, then I am to bed others behind my wife's back. _

_What was it that he would say to me? Ah, yes. Now I recall._

_He would sit me down on the front porch steps whilst my mother was inside, fixing the two of us a spot of tea, then he would whisper to me, "Ned, women are flowers—all beautiful and colorful in their own respective natures, and you must always take your time to sample the scent of each one before the winter of their lives arrive."_

_Winter. Lizzie was born in winter._

_I cannot always say for myself that the idea of flirting with more than just one woman has never appealed to me. Quite the contrary, if I am honest. In my college days, I encountered a range of women who seemed much less than ladylike, that would have given me the power to disrespect their virtues in chances my father would have been elated to grab at. Still, I am not my father. So, I shall keep a fine grip of my own virtue and intergrity until my Lizzie instructs me to do otherwise. _

_Yes. My Lizzie._

_When she is near me, I know for certain I would not foresake her love for a fling with some chicklet with wicked acts on her mind. I much love her and her alone, and hope for a prosperous life together with her. For her, my Lizzie, I feel as though I could recite my own sonnets perchance to catch a glimpse of her illuminating smile that I pray our children inherit. Her heart I would not dare break; and should we have daughters someday, may God take pity on the man that dares to hurt them—that also goes to any future granddaughters. _

_Today Lizzie and I were walking passed a modest church as I tried to recite the words of my planned proposal in my head, but every time the beauty spoke, I would lose my bravery. _

"_Ned," Lizzie turned to me, smiling in a manner that caused my heart to rage like an ocean storm, "this is the very spot my parents were wed. _

"_Is that so?" was all I could think to say then, for I was lost in the melodic tune of Lizzie's sugary sweet voice. _

"_Yes," Lizzie nodded kindly. "My father was a hardworking blacksmith. He didn't make very much money. To eat, he had to scrape and save. My mother's parents did not think he was a suitable match for my mother, and they forbid them from courting properly. But my parents cared nothing for permission to fall in love, unless the church had something to say. They agreed to run away together, and a priest spoke for their wedding on the spot."_

_I had only recently met Mr. and Mrs. Monroe. The two of them were warm, welcoming people. Although Lizzie assured me they shared a common marriage, fighting back and forth, I still wish for a marriage like theirs. _

_Happy._

_As I finally worked up the nerve, my mischevious Lizzie pulled me by the collar of my coat and into the shadows of the church steple. She reached inside my pocket; I was so dumbfounded by her actions I failed to refuse her access, but I was astounded when she pulled out the engagement ring I intended for her hand. _

"_Darling Edward, you have been carrying this trinquet around for weeks. Am I so intimidating that your mind has changed?"_

"_N-N-No," I stammered; this woman turning me into an invalid. "I-I-I care for you deeply. I love you, Miss Monroe, but I fear your rejection."_

_She released me, placing the diamond ring in my grasp. "Silly man, we have been courting for two years. If I had any intention to reject your affections, don't you think I would have done it by now?"_

"_I suppose so. . ." I cleared my throat, going down to one knee. "Elizabeth Felicia Margarent Monroe, Cleopatra would be envious of your beauty where as I am fortunate to bask in your glory. Would you do me the fine honor of loving and cherishing you until the day I die?"_

_My God blesses me._

_I saw the way the girl's pair of emerald eyes overflowed with wonderous tears. _

_Such beauty._

_How I love her so._

"_Yes, dear heart," she said. My heart soared. _

_Quickly, I slipped the ring on Elizabeth's fingers and raised myself to stand again. _

_I want to begin our lifetimes right away. _

_Sincerely,_

_Edward A. Masen_

_. . ._

_July 5th, 18999_

_Dear Journal,_

_I cannot easily explain the things I have been recently told. I am still baffled._

_On this day, Elizabeth called upon my home whilst I was studying an old dissertation Never am I disappointed to see my fiance, humbled still by the fact she would choose an offstandish lawyer for a husband when many a man would dote and spoil her with castles and jewelry fit for a queen. _

_I say to you, these pages, there is not a thing that could drive my affections for Lizzie away. She is my sweetheart. _

_Like we always do, we went for a walk in the park and she told me, "Ned, I cannot marry you with a clean conscience, unless I am absolutely honest."_

_I took her delicate hands into my own, sitting down with her on a bench. "Lizzie, of course, I yearn for your lovely truths."_

"_It is a great secretet. I am permitted to tell only one, and I know deeply that you are my own."_

_My heart sang at her words. I am her one. How could I meet a creature so heavenly?_

"_Go on."_

"_Understand this: You must not tell another soul."_

_I nod in reply. "Your secrets are not mine to share."_

"_My love, you are wrong. If you intend to marry me, we share everything, including secrets," Lizzie cautioned me, though I was thirsty for her news. _

"_Lizzie, trust me," I whispered, counting the one hundred colors of green in her eyes. Green is my favorite color._

_Lizzie sighed sharply, gently massaging my knuckles. "I am a guardian of sorts—of light."_

"_Is that your chosen occupation?" I chuckled. _

_Then, she went on to tell me exactly what she meant. Guardians of the light are healers, able to revive the innocent by means of magic. Magic! Up until today, I never believed in such a word. Faeries, mermaids, vampires, the lot—but Lizzie says that if I do believe in miracles, I would also have to believe that magic and miracle are one in the same. This is a notion I find myself agreeing with, but it is likely that she has a powerful influence over me._

_Guardians of the light protect the lives of people that are meant to do great things, who are meant to help others as well and need to be aided. Apparently, only women in her family take on these gifts and obligations. Should we have a daughter, her life would be devoted to willing away her. . . immortality for the sake of others, because good is essential to the progress of all living things. The only way Lizzie will die is when all of her powers are gone from her body, which happens with each life she rescues. Again, I wonder why Lizzie chose me._

"_Ned. . . You can always choose not to marry me, but one day our family line will be utterly extraordinary. We will be of such great powers—and what use would we have for power if not to do good? Are you able to handle that?" she inquired. Her desperation is adorable, but silly. _

"_My dearest Lizzie, you have simply confirmed what I have known all along," I chortled, running my fingers through her tendrils of pure bronze. _

"_What might that be?" Elizabeth asked._

"_That you are an angel."_

_Indeed, she is and always will be an angel. My angel. Not only has she opened my heart to love, but now my eyes are also open to everything else. In our lives together, she has vowed to show me a ream I never thought possible and show me the impossible—a world of magic._

"_Why me?" I queried, needing to know why._

"_Because of your pure soul. Edward, you defend the innocent and win them their rights back. You see a person for who they truly are, you have faith in good hearts, and you are a protector of honor. Not only that, but you love me genuinely," Lizzie whispered against my earlobe, and I nearly melted right there on the bench. "Yours is the only soul that matches mine."_

"_May I kiss you, Lizzie?" I have yet to kiss her. Naturally, I have wanted to since the moment we met, but my mother, though she adores Lizzie, tells me often that public displays of affection are improper of a gentleman and a lady, especially before a marital commitment. So, I have never thought to ask, but when Lizzie trusted her secret to me, I felt for the desire for her lips overwhelm me._

"_I am not ladylike enough to deny you," Lizzie giggled._

_In that moment, I kissed her passionately—knowing full well that I am kissing an angel. There is no proper way to describe the touch of Lizzie's lips, except that she is perfection. Absolutely perfection, I promise. And she will soon be my wife._

_Sincerely,_

_Edward A. Masen_

_. . ._

_August 11th, 1899_

_Dear Journal,_

_Elizabeth and I were linked together until death do us part. All of Chicago seemed to be within the chapel we were married, there with our families to witness us in one of our greatest moments. True, I hav been so nervous. My best friend, Jack McCarthy, smelled sickeningly of spirits and I feared the scent would rub off on my tuxedo. Fortunately, my father gave me an adequate amount of cologne for this day to disguise Jack's filthy odor. _

_Even then, I still felt nauseous; I feared I would lose my nerve in front of the entire congregation. My palms were slick with sweat, my legs shook, and my heart was about to fall through my stomach—until my sweet Elizabeth walked toward me, a vision in virgin-peach lace in the center of the aisle. All apprehension was lost in the past at the sight of her, as I breathed anew. She was an angel, her copper hair tied up hair beneathe the veil, the fabric embracing the slopes of her hips._

_We exchanged vows—to love, to honor, to cherish, to cherish. Every moment was flawless as our fingers bonded together as gold when we kissed. Everyone applauded._

_Now, I sit here in our honeymoon suite of a ship, sailing to Parie whilst Elizabeth brushes her hair at the mirror—preparing to consummate our marriage. _

_I find myself contemplating what I our lives will consist of from now on. How many children shall we have? Sons and daughters? Will they look like their mother? I must confesse that these thoughts cause my stomach to churn in excitement. I have never known fright such as this in my life. My vows are never to fail my wife, to always be the doting, faithful husband so that I may honor her in every manner. I shall never shame and be ashamed of Elizabeth Masen. Each moment, from now on until the day I die, will be stretched into a fulfilling lifetime. I have found my soul's better half. Why should I leave our lives together in the mud?_

_Eyes as jewels, fine as emeralds. They glow in the autumn sun. Shimmering upon water, love walks there in her grace. Windows, the gateway into a pure soul._

_Hair lush, copper locks—a penny for my soul I would trade my life for a glimpse of her. A love as damnimg, she be my salvation. Soft as silk, light to the touch._

_Sweet Elizabeth. My Elizabeth. _

_She gives me poetry, breathing a lovely melody into my soul with her precious kisses. Even now, I can hear Elizabeth Masen's song. Such a creature to take my last name as well as my heart. Should she ever want the world, all she need do is ask._

_Sincerely,_

_Edward A. Masen_

_P.S. I will always love Lizzie._

_. . ._

_September 13th, 1900_

_Dear Journal, _

_It was as if this week had been made to put my patience to the test. Everything had been going wrong. Although, I sincerely love my wife, she is far from being a simple woman. Only recently, Lizzie healed a gravely sick woman; by doing so, I feared she had willed away too much of her own life force. I know my wife is an angel, that her bloodline demands the destiny of others to be put above her own needs, but for the past week, all she was capable was laying in bed._

_While writing notes for my clients, I would become easily distracted by the remembrance of her feeble form, paled from a lack of sleep and nausea—the poor thing. Finally, I called upon a physician to aid Lizzie. She bid me away, so that I would not fret like a looney. But fret I did, all day. People kept asking me questions at the firm, desiring conversation more time-consuming than I was likely to give. However, by the end of the day, I remembered I am blessed with more love than I thought to hope for._

_I walked in, dreading whatever news I would hear. Seeing my Lizzie brought joy to me—always does. Some color had returned to her cheeks, a soft glow upon her skin._

"_Ned," Lizzie murmured, laying in our marriage bed, "you're home."_

"_Where else shall have I gone, sweetheart?" I inquired, going to her side. "How did the visit with the doctor fare?"_

_A graceful smile crossed the corners of her beautiful mouth. Although she appeared palet than Hamlet's dead father, her smile glowed like moonlight. How does a woman, even when sick to her stomach in bed, have the power to become this beautiful?_

"_It was splendid," Lizzie answered, sitting up exhaustively in bed._

"_Splendid?" I queried, pondering her choice of words._

"_Yes, my love," she confirmed, intertwining her flower-soft digits through my callused ones. She smiled again. "I have never been happier in my life, and I have you to thank."_

"_What makes you happy, love?" I inqueried, planting a kiss upon her cheek._

"_Ned," Lizzie murmured, unraveling the blankets from her body and drew my hands to her stomach. "In my womb," she said, placing a soft hand over her stomach, "here lies our child."_

_My mouth hung agape, a bizarre pride overwhelming me. "You are having a baby?"_

"_No, Ned. We're having a baby."_

_I have never been so blessed to be countered in my life._

"_Does this news please you?" the angel inquired, after two or three minutes passed without a word spoken._

"_Oh, my wife!" I exclaimed in a state of bliss. "I love you! You make me the most happy!"_

_Sincerely,_

_Edward A. Masen_

_. . ._

_January 5th, 1901_

_Dear Journal,_

_Once I thought, first coming across Lizzie was the moment that would be my happiest memory. Not too long ago, I believed our wedding day would turn out to be the most blissful memory in my life, as well as our marriage. But now, I know the best memories of my life still await for me—the birth of my beautiful child ,every Christmas thereafter, his or her graduation day, another wedding, and a grandchild. Through all of it, I look forward to spending it all with Elizabeth._

_Sincerely, _

_Edward A. Masen_

_. . ._

_February 16th, 1901_

_Dear Journal,_

_It's a boy! Elizabeth insists we name him after me, an idea that brings me such astonished bliss that I cannot refuse her. She is immensly sweet. I love this woman._

_The woman who carries our son in her swollen belly. From the day we were promised to each other for the rest of our lives, I underestimated the power of Lizzie's beauty—I did not think she could grow any more beautiful, but I was strangely wrong. As she grows bigger with our pride, I find her all the more magnetic._

_My Lizzie, my angel, my wife._

_I cannot wait to go through this with her. _

_Sincerely, _

_Edward A. Masen_

_. . ._

_June 15th, 1901_

_Dear Journal,_

_Our child has been birthed. My God, little Edward is the handsomest infant that I have ever seen in my life. He is the spitting image of his mother—soft locks of beautiful bronze, startling green orbs, a complexion as subtle as peach, and a face so impeccably miraculous. _

_When I first held Edward in my arms, every measure of life was brand new, putting all aspects into perspective. I am thankful that I have a secure enough occupation that I may always provide for my family. They should never be able to want for anything, all they ever have to do is ask. As I rocked Edward back and forth in my arms, I saw the way his emerald irises peered back at me—completely trusting me in his vulnerable state. I intend to always be there for him._

_When he cries, my heart aches for him. Elizabeth has already learned to decipher between the hungry cries, the full diaper cries, the sleepy cries, and the burp cries, whereas I am always unexperienced in what to do. I love my soan and I pray I learn to be a proper father as the days pass, until then I shall steal moments of bliss when Edward is calmed. _

_As of right now, Edward sleeps deeply in his bassinet, soundly tucked in his embroidered blanket. Lizzie is singing him a lullabye, brushing her delicate fingers though his hair. She knows, she always knows exactly what to do. Edward loves her and I love my small family. Truly, I am blessed._

_Sincerely,_

_Edward A. Masen_

* * *

><p>The journal accidentally dropped from Renesmee's lap on to the floor, dazed by all this information. As she grows more curious for her grandfather's thought, she felt compelled to follow Jake's advice and momentarily turned to the last page. What she found was surprising; what she found was not her grandfather's handwriting, but her own. Why did she feel the need to read the last page?<p>

_Dear Jacob,_

_If you are reading this right__ now__, I probably have gone to take care of Faethra by myself, which is something that I know you would do for me if the situation was reversed. I would disapprove and stop you from doing this, and you would stop me. That's why I felt the need to trick you. There was no other way. We're living like rats in a trap, and it's time to break free. I have been planning this course of action for weeks now, and of course, I've deliberated over this a hundred time what this could mean for my life._

_How could I not? I'm not stupid, but your life means so much more to me._

_However, I promise you that I do have every intention of returning to your warm arms in hopes you will forgive my deviousness, because this isn't meant to cause you any pain._

_I really don't want you to hate me. I just want to save us and our families. I am doing all of this for you, Jacob._

_You must know that there isn't anything in this world I wouldn't do for you._

_My Jacob, I would die for you. I would survive for you. It is you that has always been my heart and my soul, and I belong to you just as your belong to me. I swear to you that I will find a way to make it back to you. I promise._

_In the case I become stunted on my mission home, I pray that you might understand my choices. If I am gone, then I know Faethra is as well._

_Please don't get upset. Please don't get angry. Please don't shed a tear. Please don't do anything too reckless. Jacob, you have promised me more than a thousand times that you would always be there for me, and you have always been there every single time exactly when I needed you. Now let me be here for you. Let me in and maybe you'll realize that we are never truly separated._

_Death can't__ permanently wound us. The only thing death can do to our love is delay for a short while, but not forever. We are the ones who own forever. Whatever may happen today, my love for you—my best friend, my lover, my husband, my entire world—remains immortal. Nothing will ever change that._

_This isn't your fault. If you must blame someone, you are more than welcome to blame me._

_Goodbye, my Jacob, but not forever. Only for now. I'm so sorry, Jacob. Please don't hate me for this._

_With All My Love,_

_Nessie_

_We were never meant to be _

_This damn broken_

_Words were never meant to be_

_This half-spoken_

_Falling in_

_The space between_

_The universe_

_And all we see has_

_Gone away_


	49. Ultraviolet

**Disclaimer: Yeah, yeah, yeah. Nothing belongs to me. It's not like I'm conceited enough to believe Smeyer reads this anyway. Are disclaimers really necessary? Yes, you say? It's a fanfiction rule? Dagnabit! Song by Alexz Johnson.**

**R&R!**

_I don't want what's good for me_

_I don't need a remedy_

_No one's gonna rescue me_

_From myself_

_I don't care if it hurts my eyes_

_I'll stare until I'm going blind_

_You can hate me_

_I don't mind anymore_

_Because I know you're the cure_

That night, as Nessie's befuddled mind reeled from all this new information, her dreams were laced in even more new and old memories—though, this time not Edward Masen Senior's, but her own. She tossed and turned in her bed, sweating as her sharp fingernails gripped mercilessly at the bedsheets. Although her eyelids were tightly shut, almost as if to never wake again, she could see everything around her, while her feet carried her—her memory counting every place she had ever spent with Jacob Black, recalling every last moment up until she ran out.

* * *

><p><em>Jacob and Renesmee didn't always share moments of bliss with each other, day in and day out. Sometimes, but definitely not all the time or frequently, there were moments they were at one another's throats like cats and dogs. Their voices would raise, no need for the use of megaphones, and their faces would glow a furious shade of red, her cheeks like beets. He eventually felt the need to pace back and forth like a caged lion, furious at his soon-to-be wife.<em>

_The argument appeared to pop out of nowhere, when Nessie blew up at Jacob, but that's not what it had been to her. A week before, Bella and Jacob went for a ride down First Beach on their motorcycles, and then they came in the Cullen household hours later all buddy/buddy—laughing, pushing each other's shoulders, and making stupid, sarcastic remarks. When Jacob noticed Nessie, who was eating cereal on the couch, and didn't give her a kiss like they hadn't seen each other in years like he normally would, her feelings were crushed; instead, Jacob just gave her a pitiful peck on the cheek._

_Renesmee felt invisible to him for the rest of the night as he and her mother joked around like two monkeys. Watching them was sickening, the knots in her stomach churning at the sight. She knew that neither were aware of their annoying behavior, they had no intention of being hurtful, but Nessie didn't want to be around them any longer. Nessie retreated to her bedroom, and called Nahuel, because it was easy to trust her insecurities to him. _

_For a full seven days afterward, the small wound on Nessie's heart festered. While she and Jacob went out every day to the beach, their conversations were pretty one-sided. She had little interest in talking with him, wanting to punish Jacob with a stinging silence. It pleased her immensely when it was blatantly bothering him, his fingers cracking in agitation. He tried to hold her hand, but Nessie would responsively retract her hand upon contact; he would attempt to kiss her, but she would lightly push him away; he would ask if she was all right, but Nessie just smiled and shrugged._

_Finally, the sharpened tension took its toll. Nessie couldn't concentrate on neglecting her fiance forever, and she cracked. Then, his temperature rocketed in response, and she couldn't help but feel a pinch of satisfaction at his reaction. Good. When people truly love each other, they inevitably feel secure enough to argue back and forth._

_But when both of their angry disposition flared out of control, Nessie stormed out of Jacob's house and went for a long run in the park. Her legs carried her far, the wind whisked her troubles away until she forced herself to sit down and contemplate for a spell. She sat, lonely on that bench for another thirty minutes and let the tears cascade down her cheeks like a raging waterfall. Then, her head became less cloudy, and she went back to Jacob's home once the sun went down. _

_Nessie found her fiance in the kitchen, eating a bowl of cold cereal at the dining table. A whisper of elation electrocuted throughout her spine when Jacob's dark chocolate eyes widened in relief; but he tried to hide it while he stuffed piles of cereal into his mouth. _

_She shrugged off her sweater and muttered in embarrassment, "Hey."_

"_Hey," Jacob mumbled through his cereal-filled mouth. _

_Nessie playfully rolled her eyes and remarked. "How many times has Rosalie demanded for you not to talk with your mouth full?"_

"_In a perfect world, Blondie wouldn't talk at all," he snorted, rolling his eyes. He cracked a small smile at her._

"_That's terrible," she laughed._

"_So, how was your walk?" Jacob questioned, laying down his spoon._

"_Good," Nessie answered, and sat down on the chair adjacent from Jacob's. "Really good, I suppose. The adventure was enlightening."_

_He huffed out a peeved sigh, arose from the table, and went to wash the dishes at the sink. That may have hurt her feelings a bit, but she understood—she had hurt Jacob, too, and he didn't want to be near her. It was a fair reaction. "Really? Enlightening? How do you figure?"_

"_I went for a long walk in the park," Nessie said, resting her head on the table._

_She heard the sounds of the refrigerator door open and close, a liquid being poured in a glass mug, and a spoon stirring it. Jacob's warm hand smoothed over Nessie's exposed, alabaster back to get her attention. The half-human half-vampire girl lifted her head to gaze at Jacob, who gave her some strawberry milk as a peace offering. She accepted it with a small smile stretching the corners of her mouth and took a sip of one of her favorite drinks._

"_Tell me about it," he smiled warmly and sat next to her. "You were gone for hours. If you hadn't come back in another five minutes, I would have sent the entire pack out in search parties."_

"_But you had to finish supper beforehand?" Nessie inquired, arching an eyebrow in amuse. _

_Jacob chuckled lightly, waving his hand to and fro. "Of course, I had to! I can't panic on an empty stomach."_

"_Yeah, I know," Nessie giggled softly, taking a large gulp of strawberry milk. "You would perish of starvation."_

"_See?" Jacob grinned, planting affectionate pecks on Nessie's right shoulder. "You know me so well, but go on. Tell me your story, baby."_

_Shrugging, Nessie just wanted to shy away from the topic in fear should have another breakdown. "It's not really that important."_

"_Most stories I've heard aren't important. Yours are vital," Jacob murmured against her skin. _

_The sensation sent delicious chills down her spine. _

"_Fine," Renesmee said. Swallowing shyly and nodded. "Anyway, after walking around forever, I was kind of tired, so I sat down on a bench."_

"_Ooh," Jacob uttered sardonically, stealing a quick kiss from her strawberry-flavored mouth. "The climax of the story!"_

"_Jacob, do you want to hear the story of not?" she asked, narrowing her eyebrows in a slight glare. _

"_Sorry, keep going," Jacob urged her._

_Nessie nudged Jacob's elbow playfully. "Then a couple walked by, both wearing wedding rings on their left ring fingers, as they held hands," she elucidated, downing the rest of her strawberry milk. _

"_Yeah," Jacob mumbled in confusion, "and?"_

"_I don't know," the half-breed woman retorted in uncertainty, turning her heads towards Jacob. "They didn't look happy, mad, or miserable just being around each other, but I could tell it must have been a few years since either of them last smiled or laughed with each other. . ."_

_The sight of the couple completely bored by one another, especially when they seemed to be about in their mid-twenties, was frightening to Renesmee. Although, deep down she loathed the feeling of being jealous, it was better than being numb around Jacob. She never wanted to feel nothing when she was with him, but there was still a possibility she could turn them into that emotionless couple if she presumed to keep it all in. It was scary. She desired for her and Jacob to always have passion in their relationship, even if their was jealousy or insecurities to overcome along the way. Being dysfunctional was better than being in a numb rut._

"_You mean they were bored by each other?" Jacob queried, his shallow breath running down the frame of her neck. _

"_Looking at that kind of couple made me wonder why the heck they're still together." Nessie's face contorted into an emotion caught between disgust and perplexity. Her mind was still young enough to be unable to understand why two people would get married and stay married if love wasn't a part of the equation. "If you're not happy in a relationship, doesn't it make more sense to leave and move on to have a real chance at being happy again?"_

"_Maybe," Jacob responded with a shrug and sat back in his chair, "unless they have kids or are using their marriage as a safety net," he suggested. "Boring is comfortable—at least they won't die alone."_

_Nessie sighed heavily, and rolled her eyes in irritation. "I am not an idiot, Jacob. I am completely aware that there are dozens of reasons to marry someone for the sake of something other than love," she insisted sharply. "It's the reason behind the reason I'm questioning. It just seems odd to me."_

"_Ain't that the sad truth?" Jacob chuckled, patting his imprint on the shoulder. _

_She emitted a small laugh as she shook her head. "But even knowing that, it seems wrong to—to get married without love." Do children deserve the impression that marriage can be such a snore fest? Doesn't everybody deserve to have the healthy dream of capturing real love in their lives? It's what she wanted for her children. "Them, that couple. . . How could deprive themselves of being happy? Or sad? Or angry? Jeez, feeling anything at all must be a step up from being a robot!"_

_Jacob rested his chin on the palm of his hand and smiled in adoration, probably slight amused as well. "Not everyone tends to think the way you do, Nessie. Life tends to be more complicated for regular folks."_

"_I know," Nessie sighed flatly, grimacing, "but that's just it. Life is complicated. When everything seems to be going right, life has a job to make everything complicated again, but some people make it harder than it needs to be."_

"_It's scary how much sense you make sometimes," the shape-shifter commented, laughing. _

"_I don't want that for us, Jacob. I don't. . . I don't even think you could ever start to bore me to death," Nessie said._

_Jacob took a tender grasp of Renesmee's hand, and laid tiny kisses on each knuckle. That simple gesture made her soul feel content. He was so sweet. _

"_I agree, Nessie. You make me a happier, better person," he told her, grinning satisfactually against the palm of her hand. _

"_You put up with me when I'm a real pain in the ass." She didn't deserve him._

"_No. I wouldn't know how or what to feel if I was in your position," Jacob admitted truthfully. _

"_Jacob, it's not like I don't know that imprinting is a thing that you involuntarily do—that it's your genes ordering you to mate with me," Nessie said, wrinkling her nose in thought. Yes, she also knew that imprinting wasn't all about the sex, or creating a stronger generation of wolves. It also had a lot to do with love. Jacob was being forced to love her._

"_Nessie, it's destiny," Jacob replied, arising from the chair. He grabbed the back of Renesmee's seat and turned her toward him, while he crouched down to the kitchen floor. "I love you because I was meant to."_

"_Sure, sure. Whatever you want to call it—most of the time, I'm relieved," the half-breed confessed honestly, attempting not to lose her nerve. "I don't want you to be with anyone else, but that's because I fell in love with you—on my own. You're mine," she told Jacob solemnly. He was her Jacob—not Bella's. "Other times, it really bothers me, Jake."_

"_And that's okay, Nessie," Jacob murmured, drawing affectionate kisses upon her left kneecap. "You're allowed to be bugged by it, sweetheart, but I need you to tell me before it explodes. You don't have to go through your doubt alone."_

"_It's just hard. Sometimes I wish you didn't imprint on me. I wish you could love me just for me," Nessie let out a long sigh, shifting around nervously in her chair. The caress of Jacob's warm lips trailing up her leg was far too heavenly. _

"_I do, Nessie. You have to believe me."_

"_I want to, Jake. I really want to."_

"_Listen to me, I love you," he assured her, their different sets of brown eyes locked together heatedly. "And I would have fallen in love with you either way, with or without the imprint to push me in the right direction."_

_Nessie shook her head to and fro, her copper coils cascading down her shoulders. "You say that, but you don't actually know. Maybe we would end up like that couple in the park," Renesmee snorted, scrunching her face up in dread. _

"_Not in a thousand years," he promised, massaging the back of her knee. _

"_Don't jinx it," she warned with a wink, and caught her lower lip between her teeth. "We're gonna be stuck together for much longer than that."_

"_And I'm looking forward to it."_

"_Me, too."_

"_When I asked you to marry me, Nessie, I meant it. I still do," Jacob vowed, turning Nessie's hand-made ring on her finger between his thumb and index finger. "If we were both human, there is no doubt in my mind that we would still be soul mates. No circumstance changes that."_

"_I know," Nessie replied sweetly, her doubts melting away like frost at his gentle touch. At heart, of course Nessie knew there wasn't a single person out there in the world that could love Jacob more than she did, or a person that could love her more than Jacob did. "That's why I am going to take my own advice."_

"_What's that?" Jacob questioned._

"_I'm not going to torture myself when there are plenty of things in life that will do that for me," Nessie stated, shrugging nonchalantly. _

"_But we'll always get through it," Jacob nodded, pulling Renesmee into his arms. _

"_Together?"_

"_Yeah, together."_

_Nessie slid her hips backward to sit on the table, locking her lower limbs around her fiance's waist. She tilted her head to the right the exact moment tilted his head to the left, their mouths crashing together devouringly. His lips were paradise to Renesmee; she could revel in the warm of his kisses forever and be gratified. Her tongue tangled with his in a chastely furious pash, drinking in the cinnamon flavors upon her taste buds, as her delicate, alabaster digits combed through Jacob's raven strands of hair. _

_Their chests were mashed together when one of Jacob's hands cupped her crania whilst the other roamed down to the center of her shoulder blades and pushed her back against the table. The empty mug shattered to pieces against the tile floor, and Nessie burst out into bubbly laughter. _

"_Oh," she giggled, brushing her index finger over Jacob's bottom lip, "can we just get married right this moment? Forget the dress, forget the presents, forget everything."_

"_I'm sorry, baby," Jacob apologized, but Nessie had the funny impression he wasn't actually sorry at all. "We both know that's not really what you want."_

_Renesmee whimpered, arching her hips into Jacob's as his hands ventured to grasp at her waist. He tugged once at the waistband of her pants, the bulge of his jeans smoothing between her legs. _

"_But I need you," she reasoned. _

"_Oh, you really shouldn't tell me things like that," he taunted, his laughs deep and husky._

"_Why?" she questioned breathlessly. _

"_Because now, you're in trouble."_

"_Give me all your troubles, Jake."_

_Jacob raised Renesmee up. In a flash, she was sandwiched right between the nearest wall and Jacob's body, his tongue stifling the mewls of her desperation. A hand slipped between the fabric of her shirt and her skin—the hot, russet palm cupping her left breast over her bra. He paused; Nessie nodded that it was okay. His scauldering fingers dipped in to massage the bountiful skin of her breast, but both nipple managed to grow erect. Nessie's knees slid up, blocking Jacob from her, and gently kicked him backward. _

"_Tease," Jacob hissed. _

"_You can find out about how much of a closet freak I am during the honeymoon," Nessie smiled cheekily, her tongue wetting her bottom lip. _

"_Can I get a sneak peek?" he asked, quirking a hopeful eyebrow. _

"_I don't know. . ." Nessie laughed._

"_Please?" Jacob begged, going down on his knees in front of her in mock desperation. _

"_Fine, you big whiner," she playfully grumbled, perching her bottom on the edge of the counter and spread her legs wide apart. _

"_Really? You better be serious right now."_

"_Come here, Jacob."_

"_Yes, Ma'am!" Jacob exclaimed, eagerly attacking Nessie's aroused sex._

* * *

><p><em>Jacob's palms held his wife's knees flat against their marriage bed, his thick, pulsing manhood stroking the moist walls of Nessie's cave. She no longer had any breath left in her system to emit groans, screams, or pleas of ecstasy; all she could do was pant. Her mind was lost in a fog of scorching heat. Nessie's mouth was dry, her body writhing beneath Jacob's, the pair of them coated in a thin sheen of sweat. <em>

_For the life of her, she couldn't resist the mind-blowing sensations of her husband's long manhood ever-throbbing in her own body, pumping strongly and quickly. Her long fingernails buried into the boiling skin of Jacob's shoulde rblades, scratching light pink marks down his back. She shuddered, a sharp chill racing up her spine, as Jacob cursed underneath his breath. For the third time that night as well as the fifth time in a mere twenty-four hours, the young newlyweds released upon each other._

"_Oh, Jacob," Renesmee whispered as the shape-shifter in question collapsed next to her on the bed. "Mmm, my Jacob."_

_Jacob lazily grinned, drawing her coiled body closer to his chest. His kissed her slick forehead, combing his fingertips through the auburn roots of her head. "How can you be so beautiful?"_

_Sighing in content, Nessie returned his smile. "Because that's just the way you see me."_

"_No. That's the way you are. I have nothing to do with it," he replied affectionately, and then yawned. _

"_You have everything to do with it," Nessie beamed, resting her head on Jacob's chest in an easy effort to bask in the radiance of afterglow. _

"_I love you," Jacob grinned._

"_I love you, too."_

"_I love you more."_

"_I love you more than more."_

"_That's a bold-faced lie."_

"_It is not."_

"_Is."_

"_Is not."_

"_Is!"_

"_Is not!"_

"_Is!"_

"_How about we compromise and say that our love for each other is at the same amount?" Renesmee suggested innocently, breathing in Jacob's musky scent. He smelt of her type of heaven. _

"_All right," Jacob conceded, rolling his eyes, "even though I totally love you more."_

"_Do not."_

"_Do to."_

"_Do not._

"_Do to."_

"_Do not!"_

"_Do to!"_

"_Jacob!" Nessie shouted._

_Jacob chuckled, enclosing his muscular arms around Nessie's body, and tenderly tugged her over him. "Yes, that's it, baby," he growled huskily against her right earlobe. "C'mon, scream my name!"_

_A peel of outraged giggles emanated from Nessie's chest. "Oh, my goodness, Jacob Black! You're such a horn dog!"_

"_Yeah, but you love me," the shape-shifter reminded Renesmee, not that she needed it._

"_You love me, too," Nessie replied sweetly._

"_I do," Jacob nodded, pinning Nessie down on top of him. _

"_What time is it?" she questioned, finally noticing that somewhere in the midst of their wild night, somehow the clock was now resting in pieces. _

"_Hmm," Jacob yawned, glancing at the time on his cellphone. "Eleven o'clock."_

"_Jacob, you and I have been in bed for three hours," the hybrid laughed, rolling off of Jacob and sat up. "You didn't even eat anything for dinner!"_

_Grinning slyly, Jacob sat up in bed with his wife, burying his nose into her neck. His hand crept over her slender shoulder, his curious fingers descending upon the length of Nessie's stomach and trailed an index finger to trace the outline of her pelvic muscle. "You sure about that, baby? I think I got a big helping of Nessie Delight," he chuckled, nipping impishly at her sensitive, alabaster flesh. "As much as I love your cooking, eating you is so much better."_

"_Why, thank you!" Nessie exclaimed, gently shoving him back and patted his stomach. "Are you hungry, though?"_

_Almost on cue, his stomach growled. "I wouldn't mind some food right about now, to be honest."_

"_What do you want?" Nessie inquired._

"_Maybe deer meat," he retorted, brushing her hand away from his roaring stomach._

"_Oh, you want to hunt. Okay," the halfie said, stretching out her legs and let out a long yawn._

"_Yeah, but only if you want to. If not, you can stay right here and I can cook for you," Jacob suggested in a low tone, baiting her to agree. _

"_No," Nessie confessed, a slight grimace on her face. "My throat is a little dry."_

"_Bloodsucker."_

"_Fleabag."_

"_Leech."_

"_Mongrel."_

_He arched an actionable eyebrow, arising from the compressed mattress. "C'mon, Nessie. Let's get going."_

"_Jacob, wait!" Nessie squealed as he attempted to drag her out of bed. "I need to put on some clothes!"_

"_Clothes, really?" Jacob whined with a small snort. "Do you haveta?"_

"_Embry and Quil are patrolling tonight!" she reasoned, her eyes widening in a feigned horror. "I certainly have no desire to let them see me naked. Do you?"_

"_Point taken," Jacob nodded._

"_Just close your eyes and give me a minute," Nessie requested, covering the front of her body with the sheet._

"_Why would I close my eyes?" Jacob chortled, pulling down at the cover. "Nessie, we just had sex. Obviously, I've seen you naked," Jacob pointed out, rolling his eyes._

"_Yes, but it's not as alluring, or sexy, when I'm putting on my clothes," Nessie countered, frowning back at him. "If I'm naked while doing mundane tasks, you won't think I'm sexy anymore."_

_The shape-shifter snorted, but kept on the happy go-lucky grin that charmed her very soul. "See, I don't believe that's true. You could probably get me hard just by brushing your teeth."_

_She sneered, feeling just a smidgen smug. "Whatever, Jacob."_

"_It's true!" he exclaimed, drawing her close to him. "Except when you put on clothes, I know it won't lead to sex. Now that, wifey, is the tease of a lifetime."_

"_Why are you so cute?" A smile lit up her face, illuminating the raspberry shade of her lips. _

_He gave her a light kiss on the nose. "Because I'm around you."_

"_Actually, I believe you. If you were this adorable around Quil, Embry, or Seth, we would have to have a very serious talk," Renesmee said, poking Jacob's shoulder._

"_Okay. We have to leave now or I'm going to tie you up to this bed," Jacob cautioned teasingly, climbing back in bed with her, "and then we'll both starve to death."_

"_You make that sound awfully tempting," Nessie giggled, sliding up the headboard as Jacob began to massage her left knee. _

_Chortling, Jacob pinned Nessie beneath him, holding her wrists down with his firm hands. "You want me to tie you up, Nessie?"_

"_I'll ask you nicely later, honey. Come on. I'm thirsty," she told him._

"_So, will you finally get dressed in front of me?" Jacob queried, propping himself up against a headboard with a couple of pillows._

_Renesmee cocked a slender, challenging eyebrow, and placed her legs over either side of Jacob's hips. "Will you be a good boy?"_

_Although he wasn't really paying attention to her inquiry, he answered obligingly. "Mhmm. Yes, Mama." His hands kneaded Renesmee's breasts like dough, swallowing a nervous lump in his throat as if he was planning to devour them whole._

"_You're not starting off very well," Nessie said matter-of-factually, retracting his doting palms from her chest._

_He shrugged sheepishly. "Go ahead, Nessie."_

_She wasn't quite certain how to go about doing this, a reverse striptease, but the hungry glint in Jacob's forest-brown eyes made her courageous enough to try. _

_Inaudibly emitting a tiny, gentle sigh, Nessie rocked her hips slowly—the warm, teasing brush of her soft skin causing Jacob to growl like the beast he was. Devilishly simpering upon him, Nessie arose slightly, ghosting an erected nipple passed his starving lips. He tried desperately to latch his mouth around the taut, rose-colored bud, but half-human half-vampire woman tauntingly reprimanded him by adorning a wicked scowl. Jacob groaned in complaint. Nessie waggled her index finger at him, and laid back on his straight-laying legs. Her legs went to spride wide, displaying the soaking sight of her pink clit. A hand grasped roughly at her breast, roaming down to the pulsing, enhanced sensations of the soaking wet core of her body._

_Jacob licked his lips, groaning when Nessie stroked her fingers between her damp, pink folds. She reached the same hand forward, offering her aroused-covered fingers to him. Eagerly accepting the invitation, Jacob greedily sucked her dainty fingers clean of her juices. His teeth dragged up the length of her fingers, his tongue endlessly lapping at the delectable fluid until Nessie eventually withdrew._

_This time, he groaned in pure need of her. "Jesus Christ, Nessie. . ."_

_The vuluptious hybrid arose, flipping herself over and went to her hands and knees. She glanced over her shoulder to him, nodding nefariously. Jacob chuckled darkly, the sound reverberating in Renesmee's ears to the point where she shivered; he raised a hand, smacking punishingly at her bottom cheeks, then again at the base of her delicious womanhood. Nessie moaned in delight, but remembered to remain focused. _

_She crawled off the bed, toward the discarded clothing on the floor. Finally, she stood up and grabbed the partially torn skirt from the ground, sliding up the tight, ruffled fabric over the supple, vanilla hills of her ass. Then, Nessie picked up Jacob's blue tee shirt, raised it high above her head, and slipped it slowly passed her bountiful breasts; Jacob whined. Her pert nipples protruded against the cotton texture as she tied the bottom half of the shirt in a tight knot, proudly flaunting her navel._

_Crooking her index finger at him, Nessie grinned like the Cheshire Cat as Jacob quickly got out of bed, shoving her back against the wall; but before poor Jacob could get her naked again, Nessie giggled and pushed him away. He whimpered—actually whimpered—in a disapproving compliance, and took a step backward, eyeing Renesmee head to toe._

"_God," he whined in defeat. "You are the best and worst cocktease ever."_

"_I try," she teased._

"_Do you see the situation you caused?" Jacob queried, gesturing to his member standing painfully at full attention._

"_Hey, buddy, it was your idea," Renesmee shrugged nonchalantly._

"_Are you done?" he asked, fiddling with the hem of Nessie's, even though it was really his, shirt. _

"_Yes, my Jacob," she nodded kindly, dropping the vixen behavior. "I'm all done now."_

"_Good. That was torture."_

"_I like it when I get to torture you."_

"_Let's go."_

"_Okay."_

"_Hey, Nessie?"_

"_Yeah, Jacob?"_

"_Will you make me hungry again when we get back?" Jacob requested, all but begging. _

"_Sure, honey," Nessie answered with a laugh. _

_However, after that night's hunt, their lives would change forever. They would become the hunted._

* * *

><p>The next morning carried just as much confusion as the night did, but there in her dreams, Nessie recalled the answers to her questions; she recalled everything. She couldn't stay in Tacoma; she couldn't let Faethra win this time; she couldn't go another day without Jacob, knowing full well he must have been waiting for her. Elizabeth Masen had given them a second chance at life, and Nessie refused to waste it by waiting around to die.<p>

_And I'm addicted_

_I can't break free_

_I won't resist it_

_So don't make me move out _

_From the afterglow_

_Your love's like ultraviolet_

_I can feel it burn_

_But I like it_

_I'm on autopilot_

_Headin' for the sun_

_For the sun_


	50. Little Lion Man

**Disclaimer: Nothing belongs to me. Song by Mumford and Sons.**

**Author's Note: I've been missing Jacob for a while now, so let's get back to him. Due to sheer length, I'm splitting this chapter in half. Read and enjoy, lovely readers!**

_Tremble for yourself, my man_

_You know you have seen this all before_

_Tremble, Little Lion Man_

_You'll never settle any of your scores_

_Your grace is wasted in your face_

_Your boldness stands alone among the wreck_

_Now learn from your mother_

_Or else spending your days_

_Biting your own neck_

Nessie giggled, the sound strained and stressed. "Okay. You caught me. I would do anything for you."

"Because you love me," Jacob offered. "Stupid girl."

"Were you even going to say goodbye?" the halfing asked, though she already knew the answer. Perhaps she was hanging on to false hope that she could still somehow convince him to stay.

"Closure is over-rated," Jacob replied, shaking his head, "but here we are. If it's anything you and I were meant to do, it's say goodbye. I'm not coming back. Move on with your life, Nessie. Don't wait around for me. . ."

"I'll take that as a friendly suggestion," Nessie smiled, a warm illumination extending into the jade specks of her flawless eyes, reminding him of the world he was leaving behind.

"Goodbye."

"Sure, sure."

Nessie turned away as Jacob did, their individual steps perfectly in sync, with the sounds of walking forward. Jacob inhaled the rainy wind, closing his eyelids to listen—to listen of Renesmee's light footfalls, to the quickening, thunderous beats of her beautiful heart, his mind seeking shelter from the chill from the rest of the world in the noises, though he was committed to not looking back. He wouldn't, for fear that all of his control would disintegrate as he drowned in the warm, chocolate oceans of Nessie's amazing eyes, his imprint's soul.

One more time. . .

But with another hesitant step, Jacob let go of a breath and paused, unsure. He turned around at the same as she did. In the same second, Nessie and Jacob were engulfed in each others arms. His hand cupped the back of her head, their lips laced tenaciously, as though for the last time. This time, Jacob moaned, savoring the strawberry-fruit taste of her tongue over his. They could have gone on forever like that, until Jacob felt a salty liquid roll down his cheek; he had no clue if it was from his eyes or Nessie's.

"I have to go now," Jacob informed her, pulling away. "I really do, Nessie."

"I know," Nessie sniffled, nodding, "but I have to tell you one last thing, Jacob."

"What?" he asked.

"I don't care about what distances I have to cross. I will never stop reaching for you."

Nodding at Renesmee's statement, Jacob could hear the sound of his heart crashing on the pavement. If only he could rewind back to just three seconds ago and plead with her not to say something like that to him. She was trying to give him hope and that was something he could no longer have, because it would be false. False hope. Jacob refused to hope that he would survive through the pain; he didn't want to hope that he would ever see Renesmee's face ever again. Because that just wouldn't not happen, and he didn't want to cope with that knowledge.

"Goodbye. . . Nessie."

"See you later, Jake."

Jacob hopped back into the Volkswagen, in a big rush to get away from Nessie as she stood off to the side of the road. As miniature water droplets dropped against the cold ground, the would-have-been Alpha swallowed back a knot that had been swelling up in his dry throat since the moment she began reaching out to him. Denying her was one of the hardest things he would ever had to do. He didn't want to see the broken-hearted tears staining her perfect cheeks cherry-pink, but he caught sight of them in his rear-view mirror all the same. Like glass shattering against tile floor, his heart slipped into the earth's volcanic core—how it burned with the liquid-hot magma inflaming the valves, how it melted into a gray dust of nothing; yet Jacob felt his body grow cold, the hellish flesh sprouting frost—as Nessie embraced herself within the soft, trickling rain.

Oh, god.

He didn't want to leave her.

He loved her.

Of course, he did.

Why did she have to be there?

Why did she have to ruin his clean getaway?

Why did she have to cry?

All Jacob wanted to do was stand at her side and comfort her distress—the thumb away the crystal colored tears from her beautiful, porcelain expression. God, his Nessie was so beautiful, even in all her forbidden sorrow—no wonder with the wintering sky cried along with her. Jacob wanted to assure his former wife that everything would be all right soon; and he wanted her in his arms right away with the intention of never letting her go and promised that he would never ever leave her. He had no desire to hurt Nessie, not like this—but he would simply be hurting her more if he stayed. And he couldn't—he couldn't stay.

Forcing himself a sharp, strained smile, Nessie waved at Jacob; and as he glanced out the driver's seat window, Jacob waved goodbye to Nessie, but he didn't fake a smile. He didn't have the strength to. With a sigh as heavy and as long as the Great Wall of China, Jacob stepped his foot down on the gas petal and drove off. But he couldn't resist looking out the rearview mirror, and thus looked at the most beautiful woman, his imprint. Jacob knew what Nessie wanted, what she was waiting for. She was praying that Jacob would change his mind and turn around because she had no idea that she would die if he did, and that's why he didn't.

This was their finale of a moment—their last goodbye.

It wasn't long before Nessie was out of view. The clear water drops poured harder outside of the Rabbit, smashing against the ground, as Jacob continued on with his drive to Seattle in a state of total, inconsolable depression. After an hour of driving through the rain, the windshield wipers weren't doing a splendid job of keeping Jacob's vision of the road steady—despite the rain having already stopped. Eventually, Jacob pulled over to the side and attempted to collect his thoughts, which kept leading back to the day of Nessie's death.

Why did doing the right thing have to be such a destructive obligation?

Why did Nessie have to listen to him this time?

She didn't follow him.

He would never see Nessie again.

Finally, Jacob returned to Seattle in the late hours of the morning and went to see his old friend, Lizzie Nesam. He sat at his typical table and waited for her.

She was just as bright and chipper as he remembered.

"Back so soon?" she inquired.

"Yeah," came his rough answer. He wasn't the happiest of campers.

"I knew La Push would get boring after awhile," Lizzie teased, sticking a pencil over the shell of her ear and sat across from him at the table.

"The plan always was to stay for two weeks only," Jacob replied, exhaustively rubbing his eyes to stay awake.

"Two weeks is an adequate amount of time to get into an adventure," Lizzie pointed out, combing her nimble fingers through her strawberry blonde hair. There was a brown tint in Lizzie's curls that reminded him immensely of Nessie.

"Sure is," Jacob muttered ironically.

"So, come on, Jakey-poo," Lizzie started, her smile brilliant and happy. "Tell me all about it. Give me details."

"What do you want to know?" Jacob questioned, managing a strained smile.

Yes, his body was extremely drained of all its energy, but he wasn't ready to go back to his apartment for sleep. Sleep meant dreaming, and dreaming meant that his mind would be with Nessie again. Then, waking up would be such a disappointment.

Lizzie arched an eyebrow, tapping her chin. "Well, how was the wedding?"

"It was all right," the shape-shifter answered, tilting his hand in a so-so gesture. "Monkey suits, teary-eyed bridesmaids, an awesome cake, and a corny ceremony. It was pretty cool to be around old buddies."

"Knowing you, Jacob, you probably got one of those teary-eyed bridesmaids out of her dress," Lizzie jested half-heartedly, the left side of her mouth curved upward into a tight, forced smirk. The expression didn't appear to look right on her face. If anything, she looked more reluctant. "Hmmm? Did you?"

"Nope."

"Oh! Yeah, right!"

"She wasn't that big of a deal," Jacob lied, the words causing his stomach to churn with self-detestation.

Nessie was everything.

"Great!" Lizzie exclaimed, patting her palm on the table. "You'll have no trouble talking about her then. Was she pretty?"

"The girl was mildly attractive," Jacob retorted, inwardly punching himself in the balls, but it was difficult to think of Nessie and not feel torn.

Already, Jacob missed the delicious, liquid chocolate pudding color of her irises; he longed to feel the smooth, alabaster surface of her beautiful skin; he eternally desired to run his fingers through Nessie's auburn tresses; but if everything else was lost, Jacob wanted to see the sweet light of Renesmee's stunning smile.

"Pretty eyes?" Lizzie asked, but the tone in her voice told Jacob that she already knew.

"Who knows?" Jacob knew. Nessie's eyes were immaculate. "I never looked into her eyes."

"You rascal!" Lizzie laughed.

"I try."

"If she meant nothing to you, why are you thinking about her?" Lizzie inquired, tilting her head. The question was uttered in a smug tone that made Jacob feel uneasy.

"I'm not," Jacob grumbled sternly under his breath.

"Yes, you are," Lizzie replied, scrunching her nose like a bunny—in a way that reminded Jacob of Nessie. "You're missing the heck out of her right now. It's written all over your face."

"Doesn't matter," Jacob shrugged nonchalantly, his eyelids feeling as heavy as a brick house. "She didn't keep my interest long enough to make me stay in that hell."

"But she was enough to at least make you almost reconsider your living arrangement," Lizzie said, somehow knowing that tidbit of truth. But how?

Almost being the operative word—Jacob and Renesmee almost had their well-deserved happily ever after, but that was never going to happen now—their story was meant to end more like a Shakespeare play, but without the benefit of a happy dagger or poison. They almost had a love that could have lasted forever, but time wasn't of the essence. Their love was temporary insanity. He almost forgot about the past he shared with Nessie—hell, he almost had forgotten all about her, or that's what he kidded himself into believing. After all, who could forget about Nessie? What they had was meant to end. He almost stayed in Forks, but if there was a chance he could insure Nessie's protection, he would do it no matter what the toll was on his heart.

"Who cares?" Jacob muttered.

"Obviously, you do," Lizzie jeered teasingly, getting slightly fed up with Jacob's grumpy mood. "What's her name?"

"Rumpelstiltskin," Jacob laughed, thinking back to a little while ago. He had been expecting to see a monster the day there were officially re-introduced, but that hadn't been the case.

"Attractive," Lizzie commented sarcastically. "But, no. Really?"

"Renesmee," Jacob answered in a low tone.

"Renesmee. . ." The waitress directed a warm smile in Jacob's position, a strong, brilliant twinkle sparkling in her cinammon-brown eyes. "That's an unusual name, but it's beautiful. Exotic."

Jacob huffed. "Sure, sure."

"What's with you?" Lizzie demanded, sharply glaring at her friend. "Normally, you're all chipper and grins after a nice romp in the sheets." She rested her chin in her hands.

"Maybe she was a bad fuck," Jacob offered as a response. Subsequently, he had grip the table to keep from gagging. Lizzie had never been this curious to learn about one of Jacob's girlfriends—ever. So, why now?

"Don't be so vulgar with me, Jacob Black. Just because you're in a rotten mood today does not mean you have any right to take it out on me," Lizzie huffed out in a single, agitated breath. Two emerald rings glimmered around the edge of her brown irises, a color that was never there before. Or at least he didn't think so. Then again, they had never really been angry at each other.

"If you weren't trying to interrogate me, maybe I wouldn't be so crabby," Jacob shot back, his nostrils flaring along with his anger.

Lizzie shrugged, arising from the table and was about ready to walk away. "Fine. I'm sorry for giving a crap about you. Remind me never do it again. See you around."

"No, wait. . ." Jacob exhaled flatly. "I'm sorry, Lizzie. You're right. I'm just tired and I haven't had any coffee yet."

"I don't think your awful disposition has anything to do with a lack of coffee," Lizzie said, tapping the pencil against her notepad. "You do look pretty brown, though."

"Did you just say that I look shitty?" Jacob quirked a dark eyebrow.

"I could always call you worse," Lizzie smirked, as if his question was a challenge.

"No, I'm good," Jacob retorted.

"Why did you come back?" Lizzie queried, kneeding her eyebrows together in curiosity.

"Why do you sound so disappointed?"

"Because I am."

"I thought you missed me. What reason do you have to be pissed?"

"Renesmee just seems special."

Jacob's tongue swished around nervously in his mouth before he answered, "Maybe for some other guy." Nahuel would care for her. . .

"You don't sound very enthusiastic about that," Lizzie commented, grimacing sympathetically.

"Lizzie. . . Renesmee—her and I had a fling." The word she hated. Naturally, it had been more than that for the both of them.

"You fell in love with her," she stated without any doubt, because he couldn't easily hide that fact.

"Yeah," he confessed. Nessie had once been his wife. Of course, he didn't want to picture her in the arms of another man, but he couldn't expect her to wait forever to be happy.

"Then, you're not where you're supposed to be," Lizzie replied, shaking her head to and fro—again, much like his Nessie.

"Please, Lizzie, just drop it. You wouldn't understand," the shape-shifter told her.

"Fine, Jake," she humphed, clicking her tongue. "Lose out on the chance that only comes around once every lifetime. Be a coward. See if I care."

"This is my problem to work out for myself," Jacob responded with a yawn, rubbing his eyes.

Lizzie rolled her eyes, crossing her arms. "Mhmm."

"Stay out of it."

"I plan to."

"Lizzie, please don't be mad at me. You're the only friend I have."

"Then, here is a small token of friendly advice, Jake: when you love someone, you never give up," she told him in a sullen tone, wanting to sound dramatic and inspirational to him.

"And what would you know about it, Lizzie?" the Quileute snapped bitterly. "I have never seen you with a boyfriend! I have never seen you give a damn about some guy. I have never seen your heart get broken. So, don't you pretend to know anything about my problems." he roared ferociously, his glower like iron-fire.

"Whatever," Lizzie replied, her own face flushed from ire. "What will be your order, Sir?"

"Black coffee," he answered, trying to calm himself down before he phased right then and there.

"Will that be all, Sir?" she asked nonchalantly.

"For now," Jacob said.

"Don't look now, but you seem to have caught that girl's attention," Lizzie said, gesturing over to one of the rounder tables off to the side.

Now, there was a girl worth being called mildly attractive, although he was sure regular, non-imprinted guys (who have never laid their grubby eyes all over Renesmee Cullen) would describe her as hot, sexy, and maybe beautiful. The girl's features were narrow and brilliant. Her chin was kind of pointed, like an arrowhead; her eyes were the shade of a sharp, electric azure; her skin was the color of paled peach; but her hair, coiled in to lush tendrils, was golden—as if the strands had been spun from straw by Rumpelstiltskin himself. She was watching Jacob in fascination, a smile etched from cheek-to-cheek.

"She's pretty," Jacob commented, waving at the girl in acknowledgement.

"Mmhmm. Go for it," Lizzie muttered, being half-sarcastic and half-encouraging.

"I'm not interested," Jacob replied, sinking into his seat.

That news got Lizzie to lighten up. "Your coffee will be coming right up, Superman. Enjoy your solitude."

"Thanks."

The girl immediately got up from her seat once Lizzie had walked off, taking her breakfast muffin with her. "Hey," she greeted him brightly. "I couldn't help but notice you."

"Oh, really?" he raised an eyebrow, feigning interest. No, he wasn't exactly in the mood for playing the role of the strapping gentleman for a girl who wasn't even close to being Nessie, but he wasn't about to be a jerk to a complete stranger either.

"Yeah," Random Girl replied, extending her hand to him. "My name is Fedra."

"I'm Jacob," he said, shaking her hand.

She quickly invited herself to sit down. "It's nice to meet you, Jacob. I hope you don't take any offence, but you seem a little blue."

"Nah," Jacob grinned lightlessly, shaking his head. "Just a rough morning, you know."

"Is it okay if we sit and talk for a while?" Fedra inquired politely.

"Actually, not really," he retorted straightforwardly.

"Oh. . ." She trailed off in disappointment, momentarily shifting her gaze. "Why is that?"

"Because I happen to be hopelessly in love with someone else," Jacob answered, the words bolting out of his mouth like lightning.

"Well, I'm terribly sorry to hear that," the girl whispered, her voice emotionless.

"Don't be, Jacob shrugged. "It's not your fault. It's mine. I let her get away from me twice. Twice! You think I would have learned a lesson somewhere in there or something."

It didn't look like Fedra was going anywhere, despite his specific rejection. "Maybe there is, Jacob. Whatever force is keeping you two away from each other is apparently very strong. It's a lost cause." Fedra doused her lips with a crimson shade of lipgloss, trying to make herself look more appealing to him. "You could always come back to my place. I could help you forget about her."

"Look, Fedra," Jacob began, disgust stirring in his stomach. The thought of being with this girl made him want to upchuck, "you're gorgeous, but Renesmee is the only I'll ever want to be with."

Fedra rolled her eyes, dropping her good girl charade. "Obviously, that is not going to happen, otherwise you two would be together."

Jacob nodded, ignoring the serious attitude he was getting from this stranger. It must have been National Women Hate Jacob Day and someone forgot to tell him. "True, that's very true, but I don't want to lead you on. I'm not that kind of guy."

"But I'm that kind of girl," Fedra started, a smirk adorning her red-painted lips.

"Good for you," Jacob coughed sardonically. "I couldn't be like that."

"It's not like you would be unfaithful," Fedra countered, the lines on her forehead pulling back.

"She's just the kind of girl you stay faithful to, even when there is no relationship."

"How quaint," Fedra pouted in fake sympathy. "Does your little girlfriend know that you love her to this degree?"

"Ha. No. I wish I could tell her, but no. I can't. Right before I left, my idiot mouth lied—told her that it was all just a game," Jacob elucidated, tilting his head in perplexity.

"Why would you go and do a crazy thing like that?" Fedra questioned, furrowing her eyebrows.

"Because I love her." More than his own life. "I wanted to protect her."

"Awww!" the golden-curled girl gushed, resting a hand over her chest. "How sickeningly noble of you!"

"Sickeningly?" Jacob repeated, blinking in confusion.

"I meant that as a compliment," Fedra said, wrinkling her nose, and offered him a kind smile.

"Oh."

"It's a shame she'll die one day without knowing of your love for her. That's really a tragedy." Fedra looked upon the flat surface of the table, one hand sliding across to grasp Jacob's in a comforting manner.

He gulped, and his hands retreated into his lap. "I'm sorry, but you're a total stranger. I don't know why I'm telling you all this."

"People do stupid things when they're in love." She shrugged casually, nibbling on her partially eaten muffin.

Lizzie came up just in time, delivering Jacob's coffee. "Here's your coffee, Jake."

He smiled gratefully. "Thank you, Lizzie."

"And who are you?" Lizzie questioned, perking a thin eyebrow at the blonde girl. Normally, she was a friendly and warm person, welcoming to any stranger, but Lizzie didn't appear to like Fedra.

"No one," Fedra answered, at last getting up. "I should get going."

"Yeah," Lizzie agreed flatly. "That would be a good idea."

"Bye, Jacob!" Fedra waved.

"Bye, Felicia."

"Fedra," she corrected him in a stern tone.

"That's a cool name," he commented, shrugging—because he didn't give a rat's ass.

Fedra ignored him and walked away.

"What was that all about?" Lizzie asked, placing a bowl of crème down on the table for his coffee.

Again, Jacob shrugged, taking a sip of his drink. "Beats me. I don't pretend to understand people with vaginas."

"Did you two exchange numbers?" she queried.

"No," he replied sorrowfully—not out of regret for not forcing himself to flirt with a slightly pretty girl, but because of the reason behind it. "I'm not the same man I used to be. I fell in love with Nessie."

"Nessie?" the waitress smiled in inquiry, cocking her head to the side.

"Renesmee. . ." Jacob whispered to clarify. "I called her Nessie."

"Did things really turn out that badly for you to give up?"

"Shouldn't you be working?"

"Answer the question, Jake."

"I have to get to work."

"But-"

"I'll drop by some time after work."

"Jake-"

"Lizzie," Jacob hissed, feeling his vision almost go red. "I'm not talking about this anymore. Stay out of my business," he cautioned her, growling. "It just hurts too much."

_But it was not your fault_

_But mine_

_And it was your heart on the line_

_I really fucked it up this time_

_Didn't I, my dear?_


	51. I'd Come For You

**Disclaimer: After watching Breaking Dawn Part Two for the fifth time since owning the DVD, I realize how much I truly love Taylor Lautner as Jacob Black. If Jacob and Nessie ever get a spin-off book and a movie comes out of it, I hope he reprises his character. Of course, this has nothing to do with the actual disclaimer. I just felt like sharing that with you all, because you know and I know that none of Twilight belongs to me. But if it did, Jacob and Nessie would definitely have a ton of books written about them. Anyway... Song by Nickelback!**

_Just one more moment_

_That's all that's needed_

_Like wounded soldiers_

_In need of healing_

_Time to be honest_

_This time I'm pleading_

_Please don't dwell on it_

_Because I didn't mean it_

_I can't believe I said _

_I'd lay our love on the ground_

_But it doesn't matter _

_I've made it up_

_Forgive me now_

_Every day I spend away_

_My soul's inside out_

Life without Renesmee was barely a life—barely even half of a life. More quickly than anyone could anticipate, Jacob began his transformation into a shell of the man he used to be, or could have been. In fact, Jacob felt more and more like a shadow on the ground, attempting to blend in with the boring colors of the rest of the universe—a force not quite in existence, but breathing still.

Deep down, Jacob must have known that it was a waste of time to continue to allow himself to hurt this way, but without Nessie, it seemed now that he had too much time—so why the hell not waste as much of it as he could?

This was his decision to stay away from Renesmee.

His bed.

Forever spending it without her.

And now he was laying in it.

On the one hand, Jacob could no longer feel rage at Edward for doing this to Bella, now that he was doing the exact, same thing to Edward's daughter. Of course, now, Jacob had to admire Edward's willpower to stay away for a total of six months, if he felt even half of this way over Bella, as Jacob did for Nessie.

Often, Jacob discovered himself fleetingly contemplating if Renesmee was tortured by this never-ending division of their destinies as much as he was. On a level, Jacob realized that Nessie loved him deeply, more than she would ever love any other man. It was natural and perfectly logical to think that, yes, of course she was just as miserable and just as lonesome back in Tacoma without him. Admittedly, however, that wasn't what Jacob wanted for Nessie. He wasn't nearly selfish enough to revel in the knowledge of his imprint's agony over their separation. Jacob longed for her happiness, not her downfall.

Months passed after Jacob's reluctant return to Seattle—but it felt more like an eternity, or maybe just one, long day that would never see nightfall.

Jacob went to work, fixing all kinds of vehicles, and every once in awhile, a pretty girl with a decent smile would talk and flirt with him a little bit in the shop, trying to subtly slip him a phone number. He would then smile back, indulging them in a polite conversation, but every damn time when a girl wanted to see if he was interested in a date, Jacob could always be counted upon to chicken out.

In the past, he would have jumped at the idea, because that meant he would eventually have someone in bed to keep him company; but now—in the present—thinking of other girls, as well as spending the night with them, made him feel physically ill. No other woman could ever be precious to him the way Nessie would always be.

Nothing about a woman no longer drew Jacob in—not the sway of hips, the supple texture of breasts, nor the addicting feeling of tangled limbs. No one could compare to the true passion of holding on to something incredibly, magically real—someone real—and never want to let it slip away, but being forced to, all the same. There was nobody else for him, and his heart was left in ruins—for his heart was being burnt to the ground, until it would inevitably end up as ash.

What he wanted right to the very core of his soul was to share his heart with the only woman in the world that had the power to make him feel all right again. That would have been incredible—to be buried in her body one more time, and have her voice coaxing him to release every fiber of his being to her, then call it hers at last. She wouldn't have even had to ask him. All she had to do was tell him what she wanted, and he would hand it over to him without question. His brain, his right arm, his heart, his soul. But he couldn't tell her that now.

Jacob would have given his last breath just to catch a final glimpse into the vibrant milk chocolate hue of Renesmee's perfect eyes—through the window, finding him here, in that dreary café, waiting for her to arrive all this time. It was a dream he denied himself many a number of times, when his sleep would drift of to the bliss of memories of Nessie—remembering the safe, warm world of her embrace that was forever his real home, the sweetness of her fruit-flavored kisses. With a fiery yearn that ached in frosted heart, Jacob would stare out the dull, gray window into the silvery day, and sometimes envisioned his former wife appearing out of the blue.

What on earth would he do?

Probably, he would order that she return to her home with the Cullens to where her family would protect her better than he could here, in Seattle. Although, Jacob would certainly desire nothing more than have her wrapped up in his arms, with every purpose of keeping Renesmee to himself, and Faethra could go fuck herself. He wanted to hold Nessie, finally permitting the bitter side to him to dissolve away into the air and promise her that he was finished with quitting and running away from the place her belong, which was wherever she was—alive or dead.

Then, Jacob would kiss Nessie, recollecting the alluring nature of her taste once more, not that he had ever forgotten.

What on earth would Nessie do?

Jacob knew that exact answer.

For moments, Nessie would stand there, right in front of him, completely speechless—as she searched for the correct words to say in the moment of their reunion, before Jacob would shoo her away. But the words would never come to her. What could she have said? No words could have been more perfect than being in her presence one more time. Seeing her again would have been just too sweet and too good. Too wonderful.

If could muster any strength to send her away, it would have been the most miraculous cruelty. Her—she alone could heal every last of his scars with a single glance, but she couldn't erase what he had done once before. Nessie couldn't ever get rid of the fact that Jacob was destined to lose her, and that he had lost her in another life. And every time his ability to stay far away from Nessie would begin to deteriorate, those reasons would build up his resolve.

Her life was far more important to him than any desire he had to see her.

Anyway. . .

Then, he would go out to eat dinner at the café and talk to Lizzie. Sometimes, Fedra would be there, acting all friendly one minute, and then the next, she was making fun of his pain. It was all routine, honestly.

Breakfast. (Think of Nessie.)

Work. (Think of Nessie.)

Lunch. (Think of Nessie some more.)

Work. (Try not to think of Nessie, and fail miserably at it.)

Dinner. (Think of Nessie just a little bit more.)

Go to his apartment. (Which sucked, because it wasn't nearly as comfortable as the Cullen's couch when Nessie was on top of him.)

Go to bed. (Wish Nessie was there.)

Dream. (About Nessie.)

Wake up. (Without Nessie.)

And then he had to repeat the routine all over again for the following days.

On the weekends, Jacob would sit in his apartment on the couch and stare at the blaring light from the television screen, replaying that last kiss with Renesmee in his head over and over again, until he felt repusled to inhabit his own skin. That was all a part of his typical life now, though—wallowing in the darkening room of his world as thought it would eventually go pitch black. He tried not to think about her, but it was too damn hard. She was in his thoughts all the time, and a part of him really didn't want to let go.

Jacob felt nauseous on empty nights—his skin trembling cold, losing the happy, russet color of his flesh, despite the temperature of one hundred and eight degrees. He had a constant headache, his mind always running and pounding in his skull. Missing Renesmee like this was poisonous, slowly seeping into his veins, except this was much, much worse than being bitten by a bloodsucker.

It was okay, because he wanted to die this time. The pain was weighing him down and he was tired. Jacob didn't want to wait to become an old man to kick the bucket, but living out a temporary life without Renesmee was better than living forever without her.

So, Jacob didn't phase; he had stopped for months. Although, there had yet to be any physical signs of the change, Jacob predicted that it would only be a matter of time now before he was fully human again. He would start aging again soon. And if Faethra ever showed up, Jacob would be completely mortal, or at least he wouldn't phase to protect himself from her attacks. Let her come for him. He wasn't afraid to die. His life at the moment—this living hell—was a night come true all over again. And he was so done with all of it.

One day, Faethra found Jacob all alone in the dark woods of the forest. He made it easier for her to kill him and get it over with.

"Well, well, well. Look at what we have here—the mutt!" she laughed menacingly in a sing-song voice, her front-right hoof rustling at the leaves. "Where is your little flea?"

Jacob stared at the ground, wondering how he had been brought to this point of his life. Then, he spoke in a hoarse tone, as if he hadn't spoken in years, "What could you possibly want?"

"Your misery is a good start," Faethra answered, her fierce-colored eyes burning holes upon his face, until he finally looked up at her.

He forced a shallow exhale, and glowered darkly at the flaxen monster. "I think it's safe to say you already succeeded in doing that."

"I knew it," Faethra murmured, her yellow lips adorning a viscous smirk. Satisfaction was scribbled all over her expression. "You don't know how to not love that stupid girl. You can't fool me for a second, you wretched, mangy, old dog."

"So, kill me, Faethra," Jacob said slowly, not caring one way or the other. "What the hell is stopping you?"

"Oh, nothing," Faethra replied, shrugging nonchalantly. "I've just it a fun hobby of mine to toy with you."

"I think," he began in a fed up voice, dangerously cocking an eyebrow at her, "you've been toying with me long enough."

"Here's the thing, you and I obviously don't share the same opinion," the golden hind whispered, shaking her head.

"I'm not with Nessie. You won," he told her, beyond drunk with exhaustion. "Isn't that enough for you?"

"No," Faethra answered matter-of-factually and giggled softly. "If you had a bundle of children, I would enjoy taking away their lives one by one. You stole my sister away from me. I will never forgive that."

"She was going to kill Nessie!" Jacob reasoned, clenching his fists against his sides to keep the wolf at bay.

"And you should have let her die!" Faethra roared, her liquid gold eyes hardening dangerously. "But you made the wrong choice, dog. Now, I will make you pay." Her voice grew deeper and deeper while her anger flared out of control.

"Don't you understand, you heartless bitch!" he growled between gritted teeth, the onyx tint of his dark chocolate irises solidifying. Jacob staggered over to the yellow butt with sadness pounding within his black pupils, and then he fell upon his knees. "I'm dying here! Faethra, you have my word—I will never see Nessie again. Just take me—my life—and spare hers!"

The golden hind squared off her shoulders before she emitted a fiend cackle—sinister and high-pitched, that Jacob was reminded of the Wicked Witch. "What?" she questioned, genuinely confounded as well as highly amused. "I have never seen such stupidity in all my years. Would you actually sacrifice your own life to save the life of that hideous, little monster?"

"She is not a monster," Jacob replied with a low-toned snarl, his voice nervous voice radiating with heated tremors. "And yes, I would."

"Do you believe that thing would do the same for you?" Faethra queried, her mouth bleeding out disinterest.

"Yes. I know for a fact Nessie would," Jacob retorted honestly, and blinked—seeing the woman that would have been his wife covered in rain and mud, lost to him forever.

"Awww!" she gushed sarcastically, clasping her hands together as if it was the sweetest thing she had ever heard.

The golden hind lifted up her iron-strong elbow at angle, until it made contact with Jacob's chin. The impact of the hit sent Jacob soaring backwards, his back colliding against the sharp bark of a tree. It took a while longer for his skin to register what happened—whether or not he should be in pain—once Jacob had landed on his right skin with the sound of two bones crunching like twigs. Both legs were broken.

"How sickeningly noble of you. . ."

"You. . ." Jacob coughed, hissing as the sting of his injuries finally caught up to his nervous system.

"Me. . ."

"You're the girl from the cafe."

"Oh, I am so glad you remembered."

"Wh-Why?"

Faethra twirled a finger through her golden strands of hair, a teasing smirk plastered on her angular face. Perhaps long ago, when there was any real emotion in her soul, the golden hind could have been beautiful.

"I wanted to see if you would remain faithful to your mate. I knew you would. Fools, the both of you. However, I won't lie. I would have enjoyed pleasuring you, Jacob, and tear down the walls of your precious love to reveal how truly weak you are," Faethra deliberated, fixating her flaxen gaze at him pointedly.

A sour grunt emanated from Jacob's chest, while he found himself waiting for whatever was left of his wolf genes to heal his legs already. "Maybe we are fools, Faethra, but at least we have known what true love is."

"I know what true love is!" the hind bellowed, stalking closer. "Why else would I take pleasure in seeing it pummeled?"

"Faethra, listen to me. . ." Jacob begged, the bones and muscles of each leg rattling slowly. "I will fully surrender to you if you promise to leave Nessie alone."

"You bear far too much faith in me, wolf," Faethra said, shaking her head at Jacob's compromise.

"Please, Faethra? Just please!"

"What makes you think I would honor our agreement?"

"Because if you really go to know Renesmee, you wouldn't want to hurt her either," Jacob responded through strained wines, willing himself to stand.

"Perhaps." Faethra shrugged casually, her merciless grip wrapped tight around Jacob's upper arms, and she hurdled him across the woods. She could the snapping of bones and branches.

He cried out softly, whispering his pain. This was it. Jacob was giving up.

"Nessie. . ."

. . .

_Jacob swallowed back a nervous lump in his throat, noticing that he had not been breathing for quite some time while the pad of his thumb dragged over the outline of his imprint's bottom lip. Her mouth felt so mesmerizingly soft, like sheer silk created from a shop in ancient China, and as supple as the flower petals from a blossomed wild rose. The bow shape of her lips and the strawberry were both alluring to Jacob, drawing him in further for a sweet kiss that would tempt him to wander into oblivion. _

"_Nessie. . ." he murmured._

_The young half-human half-vampire girl's milk chocolate eyes flickered to Jacob's darker brown ones, and scooted closer to him. "What is it, Jacob?"_

"_Nothing," he answered, draping an arm around Renesmee's shoulders and brought her even closer to him. "It's just. . . Your lips. I can't get enough of them."_

_Nessie smiled her characteric gentle smile, her mouth formed the encouraging shape of a 'W' and invited Jacob in for a kiss—and that's exactly what he did, for what kind of man could resist such a splendor? _

_Their lips came together; Jacob's mouth tenderly moved against hers. The sensation was amazingly cosmic, as though the hot sun would implode right along with his heart if he was ever able to let go of Nessie's lips. Her mouth tasted like sweet fruit juice, or perhaps more like his personal paradise. She lightly moaned against his mouth when Jacob's lower lip scraped hers a little more roughly than either of them anticipated. The melodic sound echoed in his ears. He was already aware that Nessie enjoyed their sessions in the woods almost as Jacob did, but the involuntary noises of reassurance never went unappreciated. Jacob was inspired to allow his lips to linger for a little while longer, their lips created for this brand of passion. _

_Heaven._

_This was heaven._

_For many months now, ever since their first kiss underneath the wondrous mistletoe, Jacob hadn't been able to yet resist the sweet beckoning of Renesmee's lips, all pink and perfect for him. To keep from getting caught by anyone in his soul mate's nosy, vampire family, Nessie and Jacob would either sneak off to his place or the forest—as long as Edward Cullen was not in listening range of their minds. It wasn't like Jacob and Nessie were ashamed of the fact they both loved kissing each other, but without a proper to description to define their relationship, Nessie was the one who was hesitant to mention anything to her parents. _

_Today, the two had devised a plan that consisted of traveling to Jacob's home, being that Nessie always said that his bed was the most comfortable place to make out; but the motorcycle ride there was torturous—Nessie kept shaping her flawless lips around Jacob's earlobe, her temptress of a tongue dancing under the edge. Twice, the little minx nuzzled her face into the exposed, russet skin of the shape-shifter's neck—her teeth gently sinking down, careful not to damage the flesh, and she sucked as if her life depended on it. Several times, he nearly swerved off the road and could have possibly crashed against a tree. They hadn't even made it a full two miles before Jacob parked somewhere off to the side and rushed to get his mouth on top of Nessie's, which she hadn't objected to. _

_She groaned, placing a hand over Jacob's bare chest and stopped him. "Jacob," she murmured in an attempt to catch her breath while her heart race a thousand miles a minute. The poor thing. "Are we friends?"_

"_Yeah," Jacob replied, grinning wolfishly at her and chortled, hoping that answer would be satisfactory. "The best of."_

"_Best friends don't exactly sneak off into the woods and make out with each other," Nessie stated rationally, pulling the autumn tendrils of her hair over the top of her right shoulder—this oh-so, very sexy action had inadvertently exposed the side of Renesmee's creamy neck for Jacob's hungry eyes to drink in, and it was all he could do to not attack her with even more kisses. _

"_Who says?" Jacob joked, arching an eyebrow._

"_How normal is this for you, Jacob?" Nessie questioned, resting her head on Jacob's shoulder. "Do you leave during patrols with Leah and kiss her like this?"_

_Jacob's face contorted into disgust. "Don't make me sick."_

_Renesmee scooched away. "No. We wouldn't want that."_

"_What's wrong with this, Nessie?" he asked, genuinely concerned for her. He would never force Nessie into anything. Not in a hundred-million years. "Do you want to stop?"_

"_Yes, Jacob," Nessie nodded, and then made a face like she wasn't sure that had been the answer she meant to say. "I mean, no. Maybe. I don't know."_

_He couldn't help but smile at her indecision, tucking a loose strand of copper hair behind the shell of her ear. "Tell me what you want, Nessie. It's still just me. Just Jake."_

"_I know it's still you, Jacob. That's kind of the whole problem," Nessie said, catching Jacob's hand in hers and held it close to her cerise cheek. He could feel how nervous she was—how nervous he made her. "Are we jeopardizing our friendship by. . ."_

"_By?" Jacob inquired._

"_I want you, Jacob," the hybrid girl confessed, and molded her beautiful shell-pink lips to Jacob's to demonstrate the point she was trying to make, leaving him momentarily breathless, "like this." She then pushed Jacob on his back, straddling his hips—with her inner thighs squeezing the frame of his own. "And like this."_

_Either hand went to rest around her waist, her warm, porcelain flesh bare against his curious palms. He could get easily accustomed to seeing her like this—with her angel-like tresses of autumn casting a shadow over his face, with her perky breasts only inches away, making his mouth water. "Really? Like this?"_

_Nessie nodded. "Mhmm." She learned down, flattening her voluptuous breasts against his chest. "I started to notice how attractive you are a little while ago," the half-human half-vampire admitted, placing her hands against his stomach and propped herself up in a sitting position. The gentle, golden rays of the sun started streaming in through the trees, highlighting the smooth surface of her curves. "Whenever you're without a shirt, I go crazy inside and I just want to attack you."_

"_Would it make you feel less crazy if I wore a shirt more often?" the shape-shifter inquired, sitting up and rested his back against a tree. His fingertips bit into her soft skin and Nessie's heart roared with approval. "Huh? Would that make you feel more at ease around me, beautiful?"_

_Pouting in a manner that Jacob found to be the perfect combination of adorable and sexy, she answered, "No, I don't think that would change the way I'm feeling. . . Is this just a physical attraction, Jacob, or this real between you and I?"_

"_What answer would you like to hear?" Jacob inquired, weaving his russet digits through her soft strands of hair. _

"_The truth," she retorted solemnly, her orbs of sweet milk chocolate shifting to and fro—searching for meaning in his._

"_Then the truth is what you'll get," he promised his imprint, and locked their brown sets of eyes together in a tender stare, "and the truth is I would never hurt you, Nessie. Never. If you want to stop this-"_

_Shaking her head from side to side, she hushed him by simply placing one index finger over the center of his lips. "I don't want to stop this, Jake, but I don't want to hurt you either. Our friends means more to me than-"_

_The shape-shifter interrupted Nessie in that second by flipping her over so that he was now on top of her, careful as not to crush her with the weight of his body. She giggled at the sudden switch, the infectious sound causing him, in turn, to chuckle huskily. Jacob cupped the back of Nessie's smooth knees, urging her legs to hook around his waist, and she groaned at the notion of their sexes being pressed together, despite the annoying barrier of clothes. Nessie shifted from under him, her head turning to the right, and subsequently exposed the delicious skin of her neck to him once again. He, as a response, lightly feathered his tongue along the side. This action elicited another groan—or at least two that were created in unison. She was just too good._

_Grinning, Jacob spoke, " Our friendship means more to me than being touched like this?"_

"_Um, y-y-yeah. . ." Renesmee stammered wearily, letting out a heavy sigh._

_Jacob slid off her, and the two sat up. "You and I don't have to do anything you're not ready for. I will be anything you want me to be."_

"_What about what you want?" Nessie questioned, fanning the flames out of her cheeks. "If we had never been under that mistletoe, would you have ever kissed me?"_

_But Jacob already knew that not what Nessie truly wanted to know. "You're asking me if I felt pressured to kiss you. . ." He shook his head. "No." Jacob wanted to kiss Nessie; he had wanted to discover the sweet taste of her lips for himself. "I did what you wanted me to do. And then I wanted to kiss you again."_

"_You did?" Renesmee gasped, genuinely stunned. "Really?"_

"_Of course," the Quileute man nodded, smiling matter-of-factually. "Look at you—you're beautiful. It was the best Christmas of my life."_

_A blush, the color of fresh cherries, stained the alabaster of her cheeks. This girl was the most beautiful in the world._

"_Do you have a crush on me, Jacob?" Nessie asked bashfully._

"_You could say that." It was an understatement. He was in love with her—a fact he had been aware of for quite some time now. "Do you have a crush on me?"_

"_I think what I'm feeling is a lot stronger than that."_

"_It is?"_

"_Is that okay?"_

"_Better than okay, honestly."_

"_Do you really mean that, Jacob?"_

"_Sure, sure. Have I earned another kiss yet?"_

"_A thousand more," Renesmee murmured, pressing their foreheads together._

"_Then, don't leave me hanging here, Nessie."_

_For the remainder of the afternoon, Jacob and Nessie were all but rolling around in the dirt, kissing and laughing. It was a little bit unorthodox that Jacob wasn't actually making out with his girlfriend; although, he was desperate to actually commit to Nessie, but he was still elated to be making out with the girl he was in love with, and she wanted this, too. Nessie wanted him. Maybe this wasn't exactly a relationship, but he could live with that. After all, Jacob didn't want to lose the chemical sensation of Nessie's mouth. He would stop if that was ever what she wanted, but he prayed that would never be the case. _

_Once it was starting to get dark, the non-couple went back to the Cullen house for supper. Unfortunately for Jacob, Rosalie was there._

"_Oh, look!" the blonde vampire exclaimed sarcastically. "It's everyone's least favorite mutt!"_

"_Put a cork in it, Blondie," he grunted._

"_Why can't you two ever be civil with each other?" Nessie laughed, flopping down on the sofa._

"_What are you talking about, Nessie?" Jacob queried with a small chuckle. "Goldie Locks and I get along just fine."_

"_Yeah. See? I'm about to be a really good friend to the dog," she giggled, cocking an arrogant eyebrow. "Edward and Bella went to go visit Charlie, but they should be back any minute."_

_Jacob blinked in confusion. "So what?"_

_Rosalie walked right up to Jacob, who was leaning against a tall window, and gestured to his neck. "I think your imprint gave you a couple of huge hickeys, mongrel. Cover them up, or you're going to be Edward's new throw rug."_

"_What?" His eyes widened in shocking, slapping his hands over his neck. _

"_Imprint. . ." Nessie gasped beneath a long breath, immediately rising to her feet and whipped her head around to look at Jacob. Both eyebrows were perched atop her forehead, shock etched all over her perfect features. "You already imprinted, Jacob? Did you imprint on me?"_

"_Some friend," Jacob grumbled, glowering at the flaxen-haired bloodsucker._

"_Whoops," Rosalie muttered nonchalantly._

"_Jacob," the half-human half-human hybrid murmured in a tone of breathy surprise, studying the tan features of Jacob's face. "It's true, isn't it? All this time. . . I've been your imprint. You imprinted on me. I'm your imprint. That's why we've always been so in tune with each other."_

_He could decipher if she was angry, disappointed, or pleased by this sudden news, but Jacob's brain registered rejection (even though, that was not what Nessie meant to happen). "I have to go." And Jacob was out of there like a bat out of hell._

"_No, Jacob! Wait! Come back!"_

. . .

"_Jacob!"_

He whispered again, his voice cracking like a vase. "Nessie. . ."

What was he doing? She would never stand for this, and whatever it was that he wanted to do always too second place to Nessie's will.

Faethra walked over to Jacob, readying an arrow to strike. "Goodbye, you pathetic wolf. It's been fun." She smirked, the corners of her mouth dripping with evil fantasies. "Don't worry. Your beloved monster will be joining you soon," the golden hind promised.

Jacob's eyes squeezed shut as he listened to Faethra's threat, and he was consumed by a ravenous rage. He began to tremble, bones growing three times from their average size and transformed beneath his skin. Fur of coarse russet sprouted through his pores, his pearly-white teeth lengthening into dangerous fangs. As the change became more and more inevitable, a ferocious, rumbling growl reverberated throughout his chest—a sound of undeniable truth.

Then, the wolf stood on all fours. He raised his front legs and knocked Faethra right out of the way. She let out a deerish cry, accidentally releasing the arrow straight into the air. Jacob couldn't pause to look up now, but instead thrashed his claws over shoulder—moving swiftly as not to catch any poisonous blood, but deeply enough to tear out a meaty chunk of skin. Again, Faethra emitted noises of sheer pain, clutching her wound, and then hissed. Finally, the arrow descended down in the yellow butt's direction, and pierced right through the skin of her opposite shoulder like paper.

Even still, as she and Jacob fought to gain the upper hand of their battle, Faethra had enough strength to toss him away from her. In one blink, the golden hind was gone, and Jacob couldn't linger in the danger. Although, she might never learn of it, Nessie had again saved Jacob from certain death, but this time, it was himself she had rescued him from.

* * *

><p>"Hey there," Lizzie greeted him at his table, her typical and perky disposition washed away<p>

"Good morning," Jacob yawned, but smiled. Ever since his encounter with Faethra a week ago, he had been feeling just a bit better—hopeful. It still didn't matter whether he lived or died, but it would have mattered to Nessie. She was the factor that made Jacob a better man.

"What makes it such a good morning?" Lizzie inquired, rubbing the sleep out of her eyes.

"Nothing," he answered. "I was just trying to be optimistic"

"On a Monday? Are you insane?"

"Always."

"You want some coffee?"

"Yep. How else am I supposed to cope with Mondays?"

"Coming right up," Lizzie retorted slowly, not exactly in a hurry. It was going to be a slow morning at work for certain. Within in three minutes, she had returned with a mug full of hot coffee.

"Hey again," Jacob smiled. "That was quick."

"That's the good thing about Mondays. Nobody wants to be here, including myself," the tired waitress grumbled, then sighed.

"Lousy break," Jacob commented sheepishly.

"Whatever," she shrugged nonchalantly. "Just don't forget to leave me a juicy tip."

"Sure thing, waitress."

"I'll be right, mechanic."

"Don't rush."

He brought the steaming, black liquid to his mouth and drank it in greedily. "Mmm." Jacob inhaled the warm scent, and then exhaled in a world of content. He took no time at all to consume the contents of the mug, the bitter, caffeinated drink calming the ache of of his early morning exhaustion. Yet another day would go by without Nessie, such was the fate he doomed himself to, but he would be all right. Not whole, but all right. A part of Jacob knew that her love was still with him, and that had enough power to get him through.

"Did you already finish?" Lizzie inquired.

"Yeah," he replied, laying down a ten-dollar bill. "I'm gonna head out."

Lizzie nodded. "I'll see ya later."

Jacob went to pay the cashier, fishing money out from his pocket. He gave the guy a five and didn't bother to ask for any changed back, when it was obvious he had been cheated out of it. Upon turning around to leave—it was like slow motion—there was a beautiful girl standing outside of the window in front of the table he always sat at. Her abundant, reddish-brownish ringlets framed the angelic shape of her face, even more stupefying gorgeous than his memory gave her credit for, but a memory could never compete with the real thing. For a myriad of seconds, Jacob's feet were rooted to the tile ground and all he could do was stare—this must have been a dream, because luck like this just didn't happen to him. She couldn't be here. But it was real; she was here, gazing back at Jacob like she, too, couldn't believe what her eyes were trying to register.

With a smile as graceful and as agile as a dove's wings, written like calligraphy upon the girl's shell-pink mouth—it was all a sign to let Jacob's brain know that this was all real, that this was his life, that this was actually happening.

He rushed out of the door, eager to view her more closely, but by the time he was outside, Jacob was panting—only now realizing he had stopped breathing. "Nessie. . . You. . . What're you. . ."

Nessie shrugged nervously, her beautiful eyes glazed over with tears. "This is the place we said we would meet again, right? You waited for me, Jacob."

Words would not come to him, but words were not needed right now. None would perfectly define the bliss that was in his heart. Jacob cupped Nessie's flushed cheeks in either of his palms, his sizzling onyx orbs finding home in her lighter brown ones. He had missed her and was once again warm, no longer concealed from the warm light of the sun. And his lips took her captive, kissing her with such an unforgettable passion that they were both out of breath and in love.

Finally, Jacob learned his lesson. He would never let her go again.

_Gotta be some way _

_That I can make it up to you now_

_Somehow_

_By now you know that_

_I'd come for you_

_No one but you_

_Yes, I'd come for you_

_But only if you told me_

_And I'd fight for you_

_I'd lie_

_It's true_

_Give my life for you_

_You know I'd always come for you_


	52. Stranger

**Disclaimer: Nothing belongs to me. Stranger by Katie Costello.**

_Stranger_

_You've followed me so far_

_Until the roads converged_

_As did the stars_

_Stranger_

_The moon looks blue tonight_

_Your photo framed_

_Raw within in my mind_

_But not tonight_

When Jacob and Nessie pulled away after stealing a couple of centuries, he was helpless to resist the power of her presence. She had always been the answer to his questions, the salvation to his problems, and staying away from her had been futile. He had a feeling, even if he was in Seattle for a hundred thousand years, she wouldn't have taken forever to come after him.

Her love for him was stronger than any vampire or wolf, and if anybody doubted that fact, they couldn't be more wrong. Nessie would always be there to save Jacob, whether he liked it or not, from whatever disaster he put himself through. Nessie was everything to him; she made his life worth living. And there was no way he was losing her—never again.

Why didn't Jacob realize that he belonged with Nessie before?

What made him so stupid?

Still. . . There was a mysterious gleam within Nessie's milk chocolate orbs, so beautiful and so amazing. It took him far too many moments to register that look. Nessie recognized Jacob—as more than the guy who could have broken her heart and left her, but as somebody else. When she emitted a gentle sigh, that was all the evidence he needed in to finally understand. Nessie knew exactly what they had once been to each other. She remembered. It was unbelievable—with embers of recollection crackling in the jade flecks of her eyes—that she remembered just as much as Jacob did.

His luck seemed too good to be true, that Nessie was here at all.

At first, when their lips parted, Jacob still had some trouble in believing that his Nessie was in his arms—that she was really real, that she was tangible, and all memories were returned to her. It was difficult for Jacob to realize that this woman far more than the best dream ever. He considered that this may have been one of Faethra's hoaxes to lure him to into the forest for an inevitable death—yet he knew that no fantasy, nor a trick, could compete with the sunny brilliance of Nessie's flawless smile, the one she was giving him. Jacob quietly mused that maybe his mind finally snapped and now he was merely seeing things—this girl was a hallucination, but she felt real in his arms. For awhile, Jacob was speechless, and soaked in the beauty of Renesmee Cullen's, formerly also Black, grace. She was a sight for sore eyes—his very sore, very blind eyes.

They went away from the café window and stepped inside. When he and Nessie ate lunch for the while they were there, Lizzie was nowhere to be found after Jacob mentioned her several times in conversation. "We've met once before," Nessie informed Jacob, to which he responded with a quizzical expression, and she soon added, "when we came for our first date ever. Remember? She was our waitress."

And perhaps that fact should have been questionable to Jacob, but his memory of Lizzie that day was vague. Jacob recalled the boyish excitement of finally being out on his first date with the girl of his dreams as well as being out of the watchful eyes of her family, but yes. Lizzie had been there. But she was also the girl he met, in his former life, the day prior to his imprint's birth, and in this life, she had been the sole reason why he didn't meet Nessie. But no, that question didn't enter Jacob's mind. Not really.

After lunch, Jacob wandered off into the restroom, made a call to work, and easily quit his job. Then, he came out; he and Nessie went hand-in-hand down the street, and they went for a stroll. The two reminisced—a happy couple just going down about ten blocks. Nessie talked about the long hours she spent at the piano as a little girl, attempting to impress her family—primarily Jacob, because she loved how he would beam at her proudly; and she explained to him that when she had to live through the piano lessons again, her passion wasn't nearly as strong, because he was her inspiration. Leah didn't motivate Nessie , he recalled aloud about how much he enjoyed discovering his tender nature with every single stage of Nessie's life—how he loved to be really be a man with her.

Everything was great for the moment.

"The building doesn't look so bad," Nessie commented, tapping an index finger against her chin, as the two took the elevator up to the apartment.

"That's because you don't live here," he snorted, rolling his eyes, and reluctantly released her hand to fish the keys out of his pocket.

"You're right. It might look charming to an outside," she replied, stepping out of the elevator and they walked toward the door.

"Nah," Jacob said, shaking his head in disagreement. "I knew this place was crap before I set foot in it. You just have a way of seeing the world in a more optimistic way, even when the circumstance is undeserving. Other people can't do that."

"Oh?" the young Cullen inquired, as they stopped their tracks in front of the door.

"Yep," the Quileute confirmed with a nod. "And you know, Nessie, I've never been walked to my door before."

Nessie's delectable bottom lip caught between her pretty, white teeth. "I would hate to see this date end so soon. I thought it was going so well."

"Maybe you should come in for some coffee," Jacob suggested, stepping closer to her.

"I would love that," the half-human half-vampire murmured, beaming in excitement.

She crooked her index finger at Jacob in a come hither motion. He obliged accordingly, leaning in to kiss her succulent lips. It had been less than five minutes since he had last experienced the sweet taste of Nessie's mouth, but to him the time felt similar to eight centuries. Colors seemed to renew like winter to spring when Nessie was around, and Jacob felt at peace, or rather like he had come home after a too-long trip away.

Home found him.

Oh, and she was such an expert kisser.

It was impossible now to remember how he had possibly managed to stay away from Nessie for so long.

"I missed you so much," Nessie exhaled contentedly. The light sound was pleasant to Jacob, along with the beautiful thrumming rhythm of her heartbeat. "I shouldn't have waited so long to come after you, Jacob. I'm sorry." She encircled her arms around his shoulders.

The shape-shifter curled his fingers under the base of Nessie's chin and gave her soft lips another kiss. "I missed you, too."

"Hmm," she whispered, pursing her lips in a way Jacob found delightfully sexy. "So, Jacob. . . Are you going to invite me in or what?" Renesmee asked, gesturing to the door.

Jacob let out a groan in complaint, never forgetting how messy everything was behind that damn door. "Nessie," he replied, making a face, "will you do me a small favor?"

The half-breed shrugged wearily. "It depends on the favor."

"Close your eyes," Jacob requested, grinning sheepishly at her.

All of a sudden, Nessie's face become solemn and she seemed more offended than obliging, maybe even more hurt. "No."

"Why not?" Jacob asked in surprise.

"Because if I close my eyes or turn around for even a split-second, I'm afraid you might disappear," Nessie explained, the weight of her body shifting from foot to foot nervously. "I can't let that happen, Jake."

Oh, she was too perfect.

"I'm not going anywhere," Jacob promised, smiling warmly at her. His hand cupped her creamy cheeks and he gave her a light kiss on the forehead.

Appearing reluctant to speak, Renesmee replied softly, "You've said things like that before."

"Yes, I know, Nessie. I've been an idiot, but I swear this time—when you open yours again, I will still be here," Jacob said, wanting only to reassure his imprint.

"But. . ." Renesmee trailed off nervously, her shoulder trembling as though she might have been frightened by the dark. Her soft brown eyes widened and glazed over, making her look like a kicked puppy.

"Hey, hey, hey," Jacob muttered in worry, framing her beautiful face in his hands. "Baby, what's wrong?"

"I'm sorry," Nessie apologized, gently swiping away his hands. "I know I'm being stupid, but I don't want to stop looking at you. It's been too long for me, Jacob."

"You're the sweetest," Jacob remarked sincerely, embracing her a little closer.

"Don't make me close my eyes," Nessie told him, shyly glancing down at the hallway floor.

Jacob stuck his apartment key into the hole, twisted and turned it, and the door unlocked. He nudged it open, but just barely. Then, he glanced back at Nessie. "My apartment is a mess, beautiful."

"I don't care," she replied, shaking her head.

"Just count to ten," Jacob grinned charmingly, attempting to be reasonable with her.

"All right," Nessie nodded, giving in. She sighed softly as her lavender eyelids fluttered gracefully closed. "One. . ."

He immediately rushed through the door an started cleaning like a man possessed, attacking all the clothes left hanging over the furniture and he grabbed four pizza boxes. It was probably one of the first times ever that Jacob thought of himself as a slob.

"Two. . . Three. . ."

Paperplates were tossed into the trashcan after just a few weeks of just sitting there.

"Four. . . Five. . ."

Turning on the sink, Jacob doused a sponge in water and wiped down ever dusty surface in the living room and then in the kitchen.

"Could you count a little slower?"

"Nope."

"Please?"

"Six. . ."

"How about if you count those in Mississippi's?"

"Get over it already, Jacob," Nessie laughed, keeping her eyes closed. "Seven. . . How is it coming?"

"Do you seriously need to ask?" Jacob grumbled, rolling his eyes. "It's a disaster."

"Eight. . . Nine. . ."

Oh, no! Jacob sped up his pace. "Don't you dare say-"

"Ten," Nessie concluded in a smug voice, opening her eyes to a slightly clean, more so chaotic living room.

"Crap," Jacob mumbled.

"I don't know what you're complaining about. It's really not that bad," Nessie laughed indulgently, quirking her eyes studiously.

"Don't play with me, Nessie," the shape-shifter chuckled lightly, tossing a few jeans into a laundry basket.

She smiled gently, exhaling exasperatedly as she glanced around. "No, really! For a bachelor pad, it's kind of endearing."

"Endearing?" Jacob repeated in question. "Your sarcasm is endearing."

"No, no, no," Nessie giggled, waving her hands around. "I mean it. It's endearing, because you gave up a life of cleanliness and food other than pizza—for me," Nessie smiled brightly, and shrugged one shoulder. "I suppose I appreciate that."

"Were you expecting my life to be more glamorous?" Jacob inquired, vacuuming the carpet and gestured to the sofa for her to sit down.

"I don't know," she answered, sitting down on the long armrest, her skirt riding up her legs enticingly. "I guess I must have anticipated that there was a chance you moved on with someone else."

"We both know you mean more to me than that," Jacob said, and relaxed a little bit. There was no saving this place.

"I do," the hybrid admitted as Jacob stepped over to her, fiddling with her hands, "but what I don't understand is why this apartment is so. . ."

"Why it looks like a tornado blew through here," he offered jokingly.

"Just remember that you said it, not me, but exactly!" Nessie exclaimed chipperly. "When we were married, you helped me keep our house neat and tidy all the time," she reminded him, arching an eyebrow.

"I didn't want you to think that I was some pig that needed to be trained," Jacob confessed sheepishly, smooching each of Nessie's delicate fingertips.

"So much for that impression."

"What can I say? You've always brought out the best in me."

"Oh, boy, do I know it?"

"Were you this cheeky when we were married before?" Jacob inquired, grinning somewhat indulgently—but the words felt odd on his tongue. Almost wrong.

"Married. . ." Nessie repeated, only a little bemused. "Past-tense. It's weird."

He exhaled softly to himself, shifting his feet awkwardly. "I know," Jacob agreed, and pushed her further up on the couch. "It's like we got a divorce, except I don't ever remember filing for one."

She nodded gently, puffing out a breath, and smiled sadly. "Neither do I. It was just kind of dropped on us."

"We have new lives, new homes, and one of us has a new imprint," Jacob added, chortling at the last one.

"Yeah," Renesmee giggled, furrowing her eyebrows. "Who knew that Leah Clearwarter and I would end up being such close friends? Best friends."

"Hey, I thought I was your best friend," Jacob jokingly whined, but maybe he was a little jealous of Leah after all. His past with Nessie hadn't entirely been forgotten, but Leah would still have some rights to Nessie. There was a wolfpack code.

"You were. Are. . . I don't know," she admitted, shrugging and looking guilty for not being totally certain.

"I've been replaced," Jacob said as his mouth went agape in mock-horror.

"No, Jacob," Nessie told him in a firm, assuring tone. "Never. I love you more than anyone."

"Do you promise?" the Quileute queried, already aware of this truth. He loved her more than anyone else, too.

"Forever and ever, Jacob," Nessie vowed, drawing an 'X' over her heart with the nail from her pinky finger. "I love you."

"I love you, too," Jacob murmured, sliding back a handful of penny-colored strands behind her ear, where his lips ghosted against her delicate, cream earlobe.

"Mhmm," Nessie laughed, forcing him to stand back. "So. . . You've slept with other women."

Jacob's heart sank into his stomach. "Yeah, about that. . ."

"Don't bother to explain yourself to me, Jake," the young woman said in a good humor, leaning her head on her shoulder. "I know I'm more special to you."

"No, Nessie," he replied instantly, closing the space between their bodies and lost himself in the desert-brown depths of his imprint's sweet eyes. "You're special to me, period. Those other girls were nothing. I didn't know it, but it was you I wanted all along. I was searching for you. It's always been you."

Renesmee beamed excitedly at Jacob, standing up from the armrest. "That was the most perfect thing to say." Her arms slipped around the muscular shape of his lower torso and she rested her head on his chest. "Do you mean it, Jacob Black? Because if you don't, I'm going to break your face."

An exaggerated groan escaped from Jacob's chest. "Oh, I love it when you're kinky."

"Don't get cute with me."

"I can't help it, baby. I was born that way."

"Shut up."

He smiled gently at his beautiful Nessie; and all he wanted to do was take her by the hand and run away to some secluded island, just somewhere he could could admire her for hours without any pesky interruptions. She was just too wonderful to be around and if missed out on another second of her life, Jacob would have suffered from a stroke from the separation anxiety. Jacob pulled Renesmee in, his arms slipped down to frame her heavenly waist as his head rested ontop of hers. In return, Nessie returned his warm embrace, and gave Jacob's neck a light kiss. And it was paradise—to hold her in his arms and to be held in her arms.

"Nessie. . ." he whispered, pulling away. The taste of her name was so sweet on his taste buds.

"Jake. . ." Nessie teased, but she quickly grew concerned when his lips began to strain. "Jacob, what's wrong?"

He shook his head, tapping the center of her soft lips with an index finger. "Nothing, Nessie. I just missed you," Jacob said, affectionately placing a tender kiss atop her forehead. "A life without you is terrible."

"I know," Nessie sighed lightly, and grimaced. "Jacob, you must promise me that from here on out, we are in this together. You and me, okay? No more leaving. Promise me, Jacob."

"I promise you, Nessie," the man-wolf nodded, entwining their pinkies. "We're a team, right?"

"Always, my Jacob," Renesmee simpered.

"Yes," he confirmed, half-smiling. "Your Jacob."

"You can't keep acting like you're in this all by yourself, because you're not anymore. You're not alone. You have me, Jacob. I'm here. I'm always here for you," Nessie promised, her voice shaking in places as she spoke.

"But. . . I let you die," Jacob stated darkly, and stepped a few feet back from her.

"Sh, sh, sh. That was not your fault," Nessie replied in a small voice, the corners of her pretty mouth tugging into a tight frown. "It's in the past."

Jacob gazed at Renesmee absent-mindedly before a thought penetrated the back of his mind. "Come with me," he commanded gently, leading her into her small bedroom.

On the smooth, red-wood surface of his dressed was his first Christmas gift to the half-human half-vampire girl. He lifted the trinket to his finger, showing it to her.

She blinked, astounded by the bracelet and gasped at the sight. "It's. . . It's my. . . Well, it's my. . . My bracelet?"

"Yes," Jacob nodded. "Bella gave it to me. It's what made me remember you."

Nessie placed her hand over the leathery jewel on Jacob's heated palm, accidentally transmitting a few memories of her own into Jacob's head. "I can't believe she kept this from me."

"It's because she loves you, Nessie," the shape-shifter retorted as Nessie sat down on the edge of the bed. "Don't get mad at her." After all, Bella was the one who agreed to keep his secret. It was him Nessie should have been angry at.

"I'm not," the half-human half-vampire girl quickly replied, just a shade defensive. "I'm just in a state of shock. My head is still reeling."

"I know," Jacob agreed, wincing. "All of this is weird."

"Really weird," Renesmee added softly, "and magical. . . This isn't exactly something I regret. We have been given a second opportunity to get our lives together right—to have it all. I got to fall in love with you all over again."

"Without the imprint," Jacob mentioned.

"We're always bound together by our souls, Jacob. That magnetic pull is always going to exist," Nessie explained, her orbs of enchanting chocolate softening.

"Put on the bracelet," he requested, gently raising Renesmee's right wrist to his lips.

"Not yet. I want to wait."

"Why?"

"I don't know."

"Our promise feels tainted, doesn't it?"

"No! Jacob, no!" Nessie exclaimed, forcing him down on the bed beneath her. "That's not it at all. I'm alive right now because of you, Jacob. You protected me, but I don't know. It's doesn't feel like the right time. Not yet."

The expression on her face promised that everything between them was all right.

"Mmm, your face, Nessie. How could I have seen your face a thousand times and not have remembered you all on my own?" Jacob questioned aloud, calmed by the soft look on her beautiful face. They sat up together, smiling.

"Because," Nessie began, a glint of allure twinkling in her eyes, "we were never meant to remember each other."

"We were never meant to see each other again either," Jacob reminded his imprint, playfully tapping at the bridge of her nose.

"Nothing could keep us divided for good. Not even death," Nessie replied reassuringly, nibbling on her nether lip.

"I love you, Nessie. I will never let you slip away from me again," he swore solemnly, wishing it could be his teeth biting down her plump lips.

"Jacob, the only thing I want to focus on right now is us," Nessie murmured in a hushed tone, as her scent grew more potent.

"Then, how about we pretend, just for the rest of the night, there's nothing—no risk—about us being together? It's just you and me, okay?" Jacob proposed huskily, the already dark shades of his eyes growing even darker. "And tomorrow morning we can go back home."

"Really?" Renesmee questioned, suddenly standing up from her excitement. "You'll go back with me?"

"I belong with you, Nessie," Jacob stated evenly, not for a second ever willing to doubt that ever again, "and we belong with our families."

"I love you, Jacob."

"I love you, too, Nessie."

"You're the best, but I've always known that."

Jacob arose slowly from the edge of the mattress, his dark chocolate irises locked on his soul mate in a predatory fixation, while he stalked over to her. Nessie looked so delicious in the dimmed, yellow light of the room—the tender glow just so mesmerizing on her alabaster skin, the silhouettes from her petite body dancing and shimmering on the carpet. His mouth began to water at the sight of her, the generous aroma of Nessie's arousal thick in Jacob's nostrils. He could have buried his nose in for more, but there was another task they had to focus on.

"You are so beautiful," Jacob whispered, his breath like feathers against the lily-white of her skin. "So, so, very beautiful. I can't stop loving you."

"Don't you ever stop loving me," Nessie replied, leaning her back on the wall. "Feel free."

"You're barking on dangerous territory with permission like that," he warned, grinning wolfishly.

"Arf."

The shape-shifter molded his mouth to the half-breed's, immediately entranced by the strawberry sweetness that he could have stayed lost in forever. His tongue sparked a longing fire against the entrance of Nessie's lips, his hungry taste buds slipping and sliding in a devouring excitement. Nessie groaned, her bones about ready to transform into jelly, and he couldn't help but grin even wider. He had missed her arousing, little noises.

And tonight, Jacob knew there was still more to come.

More and more, he would have her.

"Oh, Jacob," she groaned breathlessly, "oh. . ."

Gently pulling away from Renesmee's mouth, and although she tried desperately to keep their lips attached, Jacob placed his palms flat against her shoulders, and held her still to the wall. Jacob's head dipped in between the nape of her neck, his tongue gracefully tracing the length of her beautiful neck—his teeth pinched softly at her skin, the glistening white pillars nibbling mercilessly. Jacob let out a husky chuckle, and descened further—down her neck. He was starving for Nessie, as her shoved her shirt over her head and made haste in unclasping her bra.

"Please?" she begged, arching her breasts.

Obliging her wishes, Jacob latched her watered down mouth around Nessie's beautiful breast and suckled harshly—biting gently as the nipple began to bud, while his other hand cupped the opposing breast. He softened up a bit, his tongue tracing the outline of her perfect button and licked it down, then switched to the other breast to give it the exact amount of attention it deserved. His mouth was too enthused to slow down, but another part of him desperately wanted to take his time tonight. The chemicals of his body were out of control and jittery. Jacob took a moment and paused, which caused Nessie to whimper in annoyance—shuddering vehemently.

The poor thing.

Smirking against her supple flesh, Jacob's mouth strayed from his imprint's pink areolae, over to the side of her stomach—planting affectionate kisses upon her frame, and bit down every so often. She tasted like perfection, the incarnate version of his heart's desire—her flavors like spring strawberries against his ever-yearning tongue, which made the hybrid's glorious, pale skin glisten. Jacob's mouth eagerly sucked at Nessie's skin, soft and supple, and left a trail of pink marks that would claim her as his. His tongue feathered the valley between her alabaster mountains—leaving an airy path around each underside, and down the rim of her belly button.

His mouth tugged down on Renesmee's jeans, allowing her wettening panties to be still for the moment. Tossing her pants to the side, Jacob silently mused that he would spend some more time admiring the perfection of Nessie's legs—the way they adorned a natural moon crème complexion in any given light, the silky texture, and a sexy shape that made him salivate.

Jacob drew her right leg over his shoulder, turning his head to the side and his teeth twisted the supple flesh from her knee. Nessie squeaked, voicing her delight and surprise. He lifted her leg just a little higher, licking a straight line from the curve of her right, bottom cheek, to the back of her knee. Then, Jacob buried his head in Nessie's inner thigh, his tongue lapping flat against her flushed skin. Oh, she was too good. . . He hooked her left leg over his other shoulder as Nessie's delicate fingers dug into Jacob's durable scalp, wanting him to come closer to the warmth of her drenched sex. How could he argue with that logic? He was closer to her scent than he had been in awhile, the proximity so utterly tempting and the small had the power to driver him crazy.

"Jacob, please. . . I need you," Nessie beseeched, emanating a sharp through her teeth.

"Well, since you asked me to so nicely," Jacob smirked, pressing the tip of his thumb against her beating clit.

"Aahng! Jake!" she whined, her voice sugary like cotton candy.

"You like that, babe?" he inquired smugly.

"Y-Yes," Nessie stammered, her breath growing quick and harsh.

Jacob took a small lick at the wet spot of her panties; the taste was nearly his undoing. His sharp teeth pulled forward at the flimsy cotton fabric, and ripped them clean off her body, then spat them into the discarded clothes pile. "Settle down, Nessie. I promise I'm take care of you."

Grabbing Nessie's nether cheeks with his hungry palms, Jacob's tongue dove straight into her pink core, all soaked and soft for him. His tongue lapped with her intense ferocity at the nub of fire, tickling it with animatistic abandon. Her feminine honey poured generously—flourishing profusely, as Jacob tried to collect as much of her arousal as he could with his taste buds. The slippery, excited surface of his pink flesh slipped between her damp folds, sensitive with deep anticipation. This action earned Jacob another groan from Nessie and the sounds grew more frequent with every single stroke of his indulgent serpent upon her slippery womanhood. Her sex leaked out even more, abundant with sweet and fruity flavors, and he was certain that it wouldn't be long before he would become an addict to Nessie's nectar. Jacob missed being in this angle—with his head between his Nessie's flawless thighs.

Yummy.

Nessie was like heaven to his mouth, like a reward, and Jacob wanted to breathe all of her into his pores.

And he could feel her about to come undone as his tongue twirled around her pusling clit, and she was only seconds away. Jacob was a man of his word and he was about to deliver on his promise, until. . .

"No, no, no, Jacob!" Nessie shouted, using her right hand to carefully tilt his head up so that he would look at her. "Not yet."

"But, baby, you're so close," Jacob reminded her. "Don't you wanna. . ."

"Come here," she huffed, gesturing up and down at her nude form. "I'm very naked, Jacob."

"You sure are," he chuckled darkly, winking up at Nessie as her legs easily slipped off his shoulders.

"And you are not," Nessie pointed out.

"Let's fix that, shall we?"

"Whatever you want."

His mouth skimmed the porcelain plains of Renesmee's slender stomach, his tongue played and swirled around her puckered nipple, and ghosted his lips over her clavicle, up the side of her neck. Jacob grinned to himself when Nessie let out a rough breath, a consuming shiver shattering throughout her body. He nibbled on her earlobe and Nessie rested a hand on Jacob's neck, accidentally opening the connection to her emotions.

He was tangled up in the web of Nessie's thoughts; he could feel how much she needed him—the red desire of her yearning walls. And that strokes his own fire all the more. The way she burned for him never ceased to amaze him, and it never failed to get him pumping greedily. It was crazy, and he was crazy about her.

"I need you, too, baby," Jacob groaned, digging his digits into her luxurious hips.

Nessie paused in confusion, then in horror as she withdrew her head. A delicate, pink-cherry blush tinted the ivory of her cheeks, and she shrugged. "Sorry."

"Don't be," Jacob said, massaging her hip bones. "I think it's sexy."

She smiled gently, pursing her lips nervously. "Sexy?"

"You are," Jacob laughed.

Her hands wrapped around Jacob's biceps, show him how much she adored the bulging muscles. Jacob flexed jokingly, eliciting from her an eruption of giggles. Nessie arched an eyebrow, moving him backward for the bed in the center of the room. When she playfully shoved on his shoulders, Jacob dramatically fell back on the edge of the bed. The coils of the mattress screeched in approval as Nessie climbed over Jacob, looping her fingers on the tight waistband of his jeans, but they were gone in the next second, along with his t-shirt. His clothes now rested in a pile on the floor over hers.

Renesmee's dessert-tinted irises gazed studiously at Jacob, her left hand running over the smooth, hairless surface of his rippling, masculine chest. She was beautiful on top of him, her round breasts all perfect and perky. Nessie scooched down the tall length of Jacob's body until her flawless, shell-pink mouth was only inches away from his twitching manhood, yet she was still so far away him. Jacob emitted an aching moan, the warm breath from the half-human half-vampire brushed over his needy tip. As he sucked in a sharp breath, he inwardly pleaded with her to just do it already, or just do something, otherwise she might unleash the wolf's dangerous wrath.

_Come on, Nessie._

With a firm grasp around the base of Jacob's proud staff, Renesmee peppered small kisses along the entire underside in a tender affection. She edged out her tongue, carefully darting it between the sensitive glands of her nether head. He loved and hated it when Nessie teased him like this, toying with his hopeful expectations. Her hands pawed playfully at his twin spheres below, like a cat spending leisure time with her playthings. All the while, her dazzling tongue slithered masterfully upon him, tracing the veins bulging out of his sizzling, russet skin.

Before Jacob could fully register the immaculate power radiating from Nessie's mouth, he was suddenly lodged into the back of her throat. Jacob's eyelids squeezed shut, his hands gently grasped the coppery roots of her hair for dear life as she pumped Jacob's thick member—her cheeks hollowed out, the muscles of her wondrous throat contracting around him with such a ferocious passion that he almost saw stars, as her sugary mouth stroked him in a long, hard pace that caused his teeth to grit. Her expert tongue, her warm breath, her tight throat—were all magnanimous. And the icing on top of the delicious cake that was his life was that Nessie knew all the right ways to play with his identical weights—tugging and massaging them.

So, so perfectly.

When Jacob finally mustered the courage to open his eyes again, the furniture seemed to materialize into the walls while the rest of the room blurred to black. All he could see—all he could feel—was the blistering, wonderful ways Nessie worked his throbbing rod, twisting her mouth like a wrench. Jacob could feel the familiar, splitting ache tense in his loins—flirting with the precipice of the best high ever, but he wanted to hold out just a little while longer.

"N-N-Nessie," Jacob panted in a raspy voice, struggling to find his voice again, and waved her delectable mouth away from his manhood. "Not yet, baby," he told her.

She nodded in understanding, her mouth and hands departing at Jacob's request. Her magical lips, hotter than fire, laid a plethora of kisses up the burning path of his stomach, and gave him some time to settle down. After waiting an eternity, Nessie finally reached his mouth. Her bottom lips ghosted over his, but Jacob was entirely too hungry for her. His mouth immediately captured Nessie as his erection rubbed against the flat surface of her stomach, making them both groan. Jacob's thirsty palpus dipped deeper into her mouth, wrapped deliciously around hers—ready to breathe Nessie in.

Jacob slid one of his knees between Nessie's irresistible thighs, this action causing her to quickly from their kiss and emitted a beautiful mewl—music to Jacob's ears. She sat up, her hips involuntarily bucking against the sensational friction. He grinned up at his imprint, allowing his heated palms to glide up the hybrid's creamy stomach and massaged her supple, weighty breasts. The pads of Jacob's thumbs brushed gently against Nessie's hardened buds. Her lower lip, swollen from their passionate kissing, caught between her ever-beautiful, gleaming, rectangular teeth.

"Oh, Jake. . ." Renesmee exhaled, deliberately arching her breasts further into his hands. "Jacob. . ."

His knees locked between her thighs, using all of his strength to flip their positions. A bubbly giggle escaped Nessie's lips as Jacob's fingers hooked under the back of her knees, bringing her ankles up to rest on his shoulders. While underneath Jacob's sun-like, solidified gaze, Nessie turned her head to the side—depriving him of the absolution of her amazing brown eyes that could heal the blindness of a single man. His hand reached down to cup her raspberry-red cheek, tilting her face straight—toward him—as his thumb skimmed below the soft skin of her black eyelashes. Nessie smiled, the alabaster glow beaming like a full moon—the stunningly beautiful contours of her mouth released a luminosity that would align the galaxy.

She slightly raised the lower half of her body to him as Jacob took his russet wood into his left hands, stroking the head up and down betwixt her lubricated, bottom lips, and pressed down hard when he felt the soft thudding her clit. He felt a subsequent rush of pride when Nessie growled at him like the (half-) vampire she was, like a hungry panther on the prowl. At last, Jacob appeased both of their whining sexes by letting himself fall into her. His now soaked phallus rejoiced, finally flawlessly snuggled between Nessie's tight channel.

And this time, it felt more than right. This time, they remembered all it was that they meant to each other.

Yes.

"Fuck," the shape-shifter swore under his breath. "Nessie, you're so. . ."

The wolf interrupted Jacob's train of thought. A low snarl resonated throughout Jacob's chest as he continued to plunge his handsome erection into Renesmee's delectable depths. He stroked harder in and out of her tight canal, Nessie's walls closing in around him—squeezing Jacob's length like a vice. A sweet moan, the sound of honey and vanilla, escaped from Nessie's mouth, as she rocked her strong hips into the heavy, pounding thrusts. Her arms shot up to Jacob's stomach to hang on while his solid flesh relentlessly soaked in the nectar from her womanhood. Nessie's sharp fingernails bit into his copper muscles, scratching down and left light, pink marks on his abdominals. Then Jacob growled, gripped his hands harder around Nessie's knees.

Humming to herself, Nessie balled her hands into fists. "Jacob!" she shouted.

The palatable walls of Nessie's moist snatch clamped down mercilessly around Jacob's manhood, her body writhing out of control. Her damp cave quaked, spasming deliciously and released even more addicting wetness as it cascaded onto his member. She screamed out the long syllables of his name, while his deep thrusts drew out the time of her orgasm and made it last longer. Nessie's heart was thundering inside of her chest, beating like a snare drum. Jacob couldn't hold out any longer, the mouth-watering sensation of Nessie's body reacting to him this was too much. Warm liquid erupted like a volcano out of his nether head, spilling into his soul mate's beauty. He panted harshly, collapsing adjacent to her on the bed.

Jacob was happily breathless, pulling Nessie into his arms. "I love you, Nessie."

"I love you, too, Jacob," she murmured tiredly, resting her head over his chest—over the loud thudding of his heart.

"Thank you for coming after me," he yawned, burying his nose into the soft, bronze tendrils of her hair. "Thank you for having the courage I never did."

"Jacob. . ."

"No. It's true. I know you'll say differently, but the pattern I created disagrees. But this time, I'm going to follow wherever it is you lead me," Jacob promised, sealing it with a kiss on her forehead. "No more running away, unless it's with you."

Nessie propped up her chin on her wrist. "Marry me, Jacob."

"Again" he queried.

"Again," she confirmed softly.

"I don't know. It seems kind of sudden, and you're not even down on one knee," he teased nefariously, winking.

"Jacob Black. . ." Nessie whispered, her pillowy lips brushing against the lobe of his ear, "marry me."

He nodded, replying, "A thousand times."

_Humming hallelujah _

_In the dark_

_Whispered poems leave you to be_

_Humming hallelujah_

_In the night_

_The sun might rise_

_As sometimes does it fall_

_Hallelujah_


	53. The Love of Your Love

**Disclaimer: Nothing belongs to me. Sorry, gals. Song from Xena the Warrior Princess. **

**Author's Note: I'm super duper sorry that this chapter has taken so long to get out. I've been really busy. Thank you for being so patient. Also, this is going to be a short chapter, but I promise the next one will be lengthier. **

_Yes_

_I lied_

_Thought I could protect you from the truth_

_Deliver you from evil_

_Spare your innocence and youth_

_That I could simply will it_

_Was the real untruth_

_I was wrong_

_I wore a mask to cover my deceit_

_But underneath it all _

_I couldn't keep away my doubt_

_Now I'm left without a mask_

_And there's one question left to ask:_

Last night seemed to blur around the edges of his memory, like a beautiful dream—how Nessie's voluptuous thighs had locked around his shoulders, how good it was to have his rock-hard manhood raw and deep inside of her drenched sex, and how sweet she was in the bright afterglow. Her proposal. Maybe it was only a dream, but it still felt real.

It smelt real—Nessie's sweet aroma lingered on his sheets, the fruity scent of her copper tresses was all over his pillow. He might as well could have been sleeping in heaven, if it weren't for the fact that Nessie wasn't there to wake up with him.

The loud sound of water hitting hard against the tile floor was the thing that woke up the extremely tired Jacob Black. His arms reached to the side of the bed, trying to feel around for a certain half-human half-vampire woman, but all Jacob felt on his arms was air, while his hands squeezed at the cold sheets. It didn't immediately register that his bed was Nessie-less—that it wasn't her endless, bronze tendrils, nor was it her silken skin, that was draped around his frigid fingers. He didn't realize that Nessie was the one using the shower.

At last, the Quileute man's exhausted eyelids popped open. The too bright light from the sun streamed in through the dusty blinds, where Nessie should have been resting, and right into Jacob's black-brown orbs. He expelled a disheartened groan, automatically saddened by the loss of slumber. For a millisecond of a moment, Jacob thought the night prior had truly been one of the many dreams he had about Nessie over the past few months, but that possibility was a tough pill to swallow. Jacob didn't enjoy dreaming of the woman he loved most, Nessie, because usually when he awoke to a darkened morning, she wasn't there to lay beside him. She wasn't there at all, and then his heart would break open all the more.

He yawned, propping himself up on his elbows as the covers flew back from the bed, and his eyes darted all over the room in search of his soul mate. "Nessie?" Jacob called out just as the shower stopped.

Nessie stepped out of the bathroom in nothing but a yellow towel wrapped tightly around her body, the tops of her alabaster breasts glistening on display—looking quite delicious. Her chestnut tendrils darkened to almost a more brunette shade and straightened out. She looked positively scrumptious just standing there all wet, smelling like a bouquet of lilies, daffodils, and lavender. He gave Nessie a lazy grin as she leaned against the left wall, the reflection of her backside in the mirror.

"I'm here, baby," she replied softly. She looked like a million bucks and his morning wood sprung into action.

"You got all wet and steamy without me?" Jacob inquired in mock offense, his dark wood irises scanning the appetizing contours of Renesmee's figure.

"I'm sorry, sweetie," Nessie apologized teasingly, a playful smirk dancing on her shell-pink lips. "You just looked so peaceful. I didn't have the heart to wake you up."

"I would have woken up to see you naked," Jacob said, sitting up against the headboard.

"Oh, I know you would have, Jacob," Nessie retorted, arching an eyebrow that conveyed her amusement.

A flawless smile buttered her deliciously shaped mouth that made Jacob's heart pound like a hammer to a brick wall. Her hand immediately flew to her mouth in an awful attempt to cover her giggles. It was a beautiful sound without a doubt, but it was also quite suspicious.

Jacob raised an eyebrow. "Why are you laughing?"

"Oh, no reason," the half-breed retorted, waving at him—hiding a few eruptions of giggles. "You're just adorable and I'm crazy about you."

"But I know you're a morning person," Jacob replied, suggestively padding the side of the bed next to him.

"When it comes to you, I'm also a noon and night person," Nessie said, her tongue creating a bulge in her right cheek.

"Come here, Nessie," he beckoned huskily, crooking his finger at her. "Come back to bed."

"Actually, I was thinking we could get started on packing," Nessie suggested as her dark hair began to dry up and curl again.

"Sure, sure. Just as soon as you give me a kiss," Jacob bargained, wagging his eyebrows at her flirtatious.

"Mmm," Nessie nodded in agreement, sauntering over to his side.

She bent over slightly, her fingers clutching restlessly at the yellow towel so it wouldn't fall from her body. Jacob grinned smugly to himself, pulling Nessie on the bed. Letting out a shrill squeal of delight, Nessie placed her hands on either side of his face, and gave Jacob a gentle kiss on the forehead, but he couldn't be satisfied with just that. He shook his head at Nessie, molding his lips to hers in a chaste kiss that quickly grew more eager, and he felt her inner thigh rub against his erection. Jacob snarled softly, his lips slipping backward over his teeth.

When Nessie opened her eyes at Jacob, she automatically snickered.

Jacob rolled his eyes. "You're laughing again."

"I'm sorry, baby," the half-human half-vampire apologized between fits of giggles. "I'm so sorry. I was just thinking about the time I took a trashcan lid and went makeshift sledding down a hill." It had been Renesmee's third winter, and she was on a hunt with her father, Emmett, and Jacob. "Uncle Emmett flung himself in the way and surprised me so much that I went soaring through the air. When I was about to crash into the ground, you jumped down. I landed right on your back and you saved me."

At the time, Jacob had been phased into a wolf, but he couldn't help but yelp when his favorite, little companion was about to break a leg. After he made sure Nessie was safe, Edward all but tore Emmett a new one, which was nothing what Bella and Rosalie did to Emmett once they heard about the incident.

Anyway. . .

As Nessie recollected this memory aloud, Jacob studiously watched the contours of her face. It seemed to him that the memory to her was something to smile about, not laugh at. Still, Jacob decided to along with her, knowing he would find out later what was so garsh darn funny.

"Well, I think we both knew that I wasn't exactly going to let you get hurt," the shape-shifter replied, tilting his head in a nonchalant manner.

"That's why you're my hero," she laughed, playfully pointing her index finger in one of Jacob's smooth dimples.

"I love you," Jacob said, winking at her.

"I love you, too," Nessie replied, scrunching up her adorable nose.

He glanced at Nessie's wrist, finally taking notice to the small trinket dressed upon her alabaster skin. "Hey, you're wearing the bracelet."

"Yeah," Nessie nodded as Jacob started fiddling with her arms. "After we made love last night, it just felt right to wear it again."

"I should have tried to get you out of your clothes a lot sooner," he said, pressing his hands into the supple cheeks of her plump backside.

"That always does the job," Nessie shrugged.

"Oh, really?" Jacob questioned, mentally wishing that the stupid towel would just fall away already. "I wonder what else we could accomplish if that towel was put out of its misery."

"Your idea does have a ton of merit," Nessie replied, her pearly whites catching the edge of her bottom lip in a positively delectable fashion.

"Because I'm a genius," Jacob stated smugly, chuckling lightly.

As his wife. . . his fiancé arose from the bed and opened a drawer, she found one of his old navy t-shirts, tossing the poor towel aside. For just a few short seconds, Jacob was able to watch the enticing way Nessie's breasts slightly bounced along with movements of her naked body while she slipped his shirt on. He had to admit that she looked all the more. . . loveable—like he could have taken her against the bathroom counter, all the while she kept on his shirt. It was better than any fantasy he might have had with Nessie wearing sheer lingerie.

"I don't know about that," Nessie joked, casting a teasing wink in his direction.

"Hey!"

A sheepish smirk played at each corner of her lips as she shrugged unapologetically. "Whatever. You're not offended, so don't pretend you are."

"Miss Know It All," Jacob chuckled, childishly sticking his tongue out at her.

"Only when it comes to you, honey," Nessie replied, pursing her delectable lips back at Jacob and stuck her nose in the air. "Mmm, maybe you should take a shower."

"Is that your nice way of saying that my scent is offensive to you?" Jacob questioned, tilting his head at Nessie.

She slid on a little pair of ass-hugging, peach boyshorts. "I love your scent, lover boy. You still kind of smell like sex."

"And you did, too," Jacob started, reminding himself that he adored it when Renesmee's fruitful fragrance combined irresistibly with his own, whenever he got her all sexed up, "but you went and washed it all off."

"I'm sorry, my Jacob," Renesmee giggled, not quite meaning her apology, but he was more bothered by her suspicious laughter this morning. Of course, it was a beautiful sound as always, yet Jacob couldn't help but be skeptical.

"You keep laughing," the La Push-native pointed out, momentarily distracted by the delicious shape of his soul mate's legs when she walked over to the duffle bag she brought along with her as she attempted to discreetly drop a marker inside. "Why are you laughing again?"

"It's the way you keep looking at me," she answered, casting a lingering, hungry glance over her shoulder. "I'm out of practice with it, I guess. I need to get used to it again."

He could live with that explanation. "All right, baby. I'm gonna go take a shower."

"Okay," the hybrid replied in a futile attempt to stifle her girlish laughter.

"Again with the heeheehee," Jacob mocked with a swift roll of his eyes. "Are you sure you're not half-hyena?"

"I'm positive," Nessie replied, giving Jacob a squinty-eyed glower. "Go," she shooed him, waving him away. "Go shower."

Jacob, although very reluctantly, withdrew the covers from his body and hopped out of bed. A modest cherry blush painted Nessie's pretty cheeks as she shuffled around her bag, pretending to be searching for something. She was nervous to look upon Jacob's nude form, and he immediately figured that this could be an entertaining game to play. He breezed on over to Nessie and tauntingly brushed his proud erection against the tight space between her bottom cheeks. Squeaking out in a fit of surprised delight, she turned around. Her alabaster features went from pink to red while she tried to look everywhere but down. Jacob's eyebrows perked upon his forehead at her shyness.

"Get out of my face," Nessie ordered, gesturing toward the bathroom.

Chuckling quietly to himself, Jacob dramatically sauntered over to the bathroom. Nessie emitted a loud, ringing wolf whistle, to which they both ended up cracking up in laughter at. Finally, he went into his restroom, and caught a quick glimpse of himself in the mirror—then, Jacob had to do a doubletake. Above his upper lip was a marked-on mustache that curled at either end. On top of his forehead were the big, black, and capitalized words, "I'M SO HOT!" and on his right cheek was, "NESSIE WAS HERE," then on his left cheek was a smiley face. His dark brown eyes widened in shock and realization.

"What!" he shouted. "Nessie!" Grabbing a can of shaving crème, Jacob ran out of the washroom and attacked. "Oh, hell no! Come here!" He sprayed the white substance all over her body as Jacob pinned her down to the bed.

"No, Jacob!" Nessie squealed between peals of laughter, struggling to fight him off.

It wasn't long before their playful foreplay turned into a phenomenal morning romp against the wall, then the restroom mirror, and then finally in the shower. Thankfully, the afternoon hours took a short time to roll around. Jacob came out dressed in a pair of khaki cut-offs and a black t-shirt. As Nessie took a third shower, he started removing just a few pairs of clothes from the drawers. He really didn't need to take that much back home with him. All he preferred to suddenly forget was that he was ever without Nessie in the first place. He didn't want to bring any reminders of the pathetic life he was doomed to if she wasn't there to cheer him up.

She came out, clad in another one his shirt, and she still looked as tasty as ever. Jacob truly loved seeing Nessie in his clothes—anything that marked her as his. His girl. It was more promising than possibility of Renesmee adorning any form of expensive lingerie from Victoria's Secret.

"Why do you look good in everything?" Jacob inquired, almost drooling at the way Nessie paraded around his red t-shirt. God, her ass looked great.

"Because you're bias," Nessie answered, shrugging and shaking her head.

"I don't think so," Jacob replied, zipping up a few bags and shoved them into one suitcase. "Go ask any guy out there. They'll say you're fine as fu-"

"Jacob Black!" Nessie scowled in a light, breathy voice, but her lips were plastered with a sheepish smile.

She skittered out of the room, into the kitchen, and turned on the faucet as she collected the dirty plates scattered all over the counter. Renesmee set the small stack on the side, and pulled her hair into a tight ponytail.

Jacob chuckled. "You don't have to wash my dishes."

"I know that I don't have to, but I want to," the half-breed said, checking to see if the water was warm enough yet.

"Leave them alone, Nessie. I'll buy new stuff when we get home," Jacob replied and reached over to shut the sink off.

"Home. . ." Nessie repeated in an airy tone. Her teeth gently dug into the edge of her bottom lip in a thoughtful expression. She walked into the living room and plopped down on the sofa. "What will our living arrangements be?"

Kneeling down in front of Renesmee, he began to rub the smooth, milky surface of her thighs. "I don't know. To be honest, I haven't thought about it much. We could move in with Billy temporarily, until we find a place that we could have all to ourselves."

"I wonder how I'm supposed to explain all of this to my family," Nessie thought aloud, pursing her sweet lips.

"What do you mean?" he asked, slightly twitching his head to the right in befuddlement.

"As soon as I remembered, I left home to come find you," the girl-woman elucidated and took Jacob's wrist into her hands. "They don't know I'm here, Jacob."

"You stubborn girl," Jacob chortled, swiping his fingers through his raven-black locks. His words were a minor jibe disguised in a heartfelt compliment, but honestly, he quite admired and adored her spunky characteristics.

"I haven't thought of what I'm going to tell them," Nessie said, laying down on the side of the couch.

"What's wrong with the truth?" Jacob questioned, and combed his fingers through her bronze tendrils.

"Jacob," was her soft murmur of response. She smiled gracefully, though tightly—as if she didn't know how to speak, "I died."

"I remember. Believe me, I remember. That has never slipped my mind," Jacob nodded, the silken texture of her vibrant hair running over his fingertips. "What's your point?"

"I don't want anyone acting weird around me," Nessie retorted, sighing exasperatedly. "My mother is already overprotective enough. I definitely don't need eight vampires on my case all the time. They would lock me away in a secluded tower cell for the rest of my life."

"Maybe that's what you need."

"No way."

"It's only a matter of time," Jacob shrugged, exhaling as he became all too entranced in the chocolate swirls of his life's orbs. He knew there was something incredibly inevitable about their situation. "Edward is going to find out."

"My mom can use her shield, right?" Nessie inquired wearily. Her heart began to pound a little, getting nervous.

"He'll get suspicious," Jacob replied.

"It's better than knowing the truth," Nessie answered.

Her voice rang clearly in the crevices of Jacob's mind, inspiring a tender affection from his heart that he almost swooned. He felt as though his soul had been aired out from the love and guilt whirling in the room today; he must have realized that he was the true reason behind Nessie's deception to her own family.

"Yeah," Jacob agreed slightly, giving her hand a light peck. "He'll never forget it—that I let his daughter die."

"Jacob, my death was not your fault," Nessie stated firmly, sitting up on the couch. "Never. It was never your fault."

"How could you know that?" Jacob queried, standing up, and gazed down at her lovely face—the agile features contorted into reassurance. "I kept you caged in our own home. Of course, you would try to fly the coop and go looking to die."

"Oh, no," Nessie replied, shaking her head to and fro as her autumn curls swung from side-to-side. She stood up as well. "The only goal I had in mind when I went to Faethra was to protect you. You know that. We couldn't spend the rest of the world looking over our shoulders."

Nodding in agreement, Jacob tugged her petite figure into his arms. "You're right, Nessie, but I can't lose you again. I can't live with myself," the shape-shifter promised, resting his chin on the top of her head. "Trust me. I've learned that by now. You can't ask me to live without you ever again."

"And you can ask me to ever live without you," she bargained determinedly. "You're not the only one that has gone years without."

"I love you, Nessie. I do," Jacob replied earnestly, kissing her lightly on the forehead. "You can't leave me, Nessie. You just can't. Please, just stay with me forever."

"I am right here, my Jacob," the half-human half-vampire woman told her lover, gazing solemnly into his forest-brown orbs. "I'm right here in front of you and I'm not going to leave you."

Jacob disengaged himself, turning around. Otherwise, he might have actually started to cry like a big baby. "But why did you before?" he queried, feeling the way he did when she died—bitter and confused.

"I didn't mean to die, Jacob, but it was a sacrifice I was willing to make—for you," she deliberated, resting her arms around his lower torso from behind. A graceful sigh emanated from her sugary voice, brushing against the hairs of his neck. "Even if we didn't get another chance to live and fall in love, I would have died for you still, Jacob. And I'd do it again."

_Don't say that._

"All for me?" Jacob inquired, always puzzled by her extreme compassion, her unfailing faith in their love. He knew that he would have done the same for her, if he were in her shoes, but her dying for his survival? It was wrong. "Nessie, I didn't want you to die."

"I'm sorry that I put you through so much pain, Jake," Renesmee apologized, maneuvering around him. Jacob folded his arms over his wide chest, burning holes into the floorboards as he stared down. Nessie's bottom lip jutted out in a quivering pout, stifling oncoming tears. "Look at me, Jacob." When he refused, she positioned her palms on his cheeks and forced him. "I'm so sorry."

"I almost hated you for dying. Can you believe that? I hated you, Nessie. . ." Jacob confessed, closing his eyelids shut. He shook his head and sighed heavily. "You left me. That was everything that I knew. At first, all I had in me was anger."

Those first few days after her death were terrible. Perhaps if he held on to last remnants of red-hot madness, he would wake up from this nightmare. It was all a mistake. Nessie wasn't really dead. If he clung to hate, none of this was real. All he could do was walk around in a violent rage, destroying everything in his path like a tornado filled with hatred; but after smashing their church to ruins, Jacob wasn't strong enough to feel ire—he wasn't strong enough to feel. He just wanted to go numb from the ache inside his chest.

"Then, sadness."

"I don't regret ensuring that you were safe, Jacob," she stated firmly. "We're here now."

"We almost forgot to remember each other, Nessie. You were almost safe from me," Jacob replied dejectedly. It was his biggest regret, that his love was responsible for always putting Renesmee in such precarious situations.

"I don't care about being safe, Jacob," Nessie whispered. Her mahogany eyebrows kneaded together in consideration. "I love you. That's more important to me. I was only half of myself without you in my life."

"Same here," Jacob concurred, nodding in hesitant remembrance of the many months he spent dwelling in the shadow of a man he was in a past life. "But at least you weren't in danger."

"I would rather die," Nessie exclaimed, glaring darkly up at Jacob as if he were speaking a made-up language that she couldn't understand, "than never fall in love with you, Jacob Black."

"Don't say that, Nessie."

"It's true."

"I don't care. I'm not going to let you die again."

Renesmee softened, her liquid chocolate irises conveying her sweet understanding. "Everything is going to be all right. This time we'll stay together. We're a team."

Jacob inwardly mused about the moment when he was reminded about the entirety of his forgotten life—Bella showing him Nessie's bracelet. An artifact caused all of the memories to come rushing back. Then, he had to ask: "How did you find out?"

"I read Elizabeth's diary," Nessie answered tucking a strand of hair behind the shell of her hair.

"Your grandmother?" the shape-shifter inquired sheepishly.

"Yes," Nessie retorted, nervously turning away from Jacob. Her forehead began to heat up. It was bizarre for Jacob to watch her try to search for the right words to say. "She's a healer of sorts. Before I died, I went to find her."

"What?" Jacob questioned, confounded by what he was hearing. He had to make sure.

"I knew she would help us," she replied, shrugging bashfully.

"I went to Elizabeth, too."

"Yes, I know," Nessie smiled wearily. Her chest sunk deeply, emitting a brick-heavy sigh. "I also knew what we could be risking if we signed away our memories, but I believed everything would be okay. I have never doubted us and what our love is capable of."

"Show me," Jacob requested, bringing Nessie's delicate hands to his face.

"Wh-What?" Nessie asked, beginning to retract her remarkable touch, but Jacob gripped on to her a tiny bit tighter and kept her there.

"Show me with your powers," Jacob clarified, leaning his cheek into Nessie's palm. "I wanna know everything."

"Jake, I don't think that's such a good idea," Renesmee said, reluctant to open the connection into the truth.

"I need to know, Nessie," Jacob pleaded gently with her. "Please? Don't be afraid."

"What do you want to see?"

"Every secret you've kept from me."

"That's a lot."

"I figured, but it's okay."

"All right," Nessie nodded, sighing.

A plethora of memories filled Jacob's head.

_Can you forgive me?_

_Open up your heart _

_And let me in_

_No matter if the fates against us turn_

_There's one thing through all of this I've learned_

_That what I need from you is to_

_Forgive me, I'm sorry_

_Believe me_

_Stop hating, stop hurting_

_Forgive me_

_Forgive those who harm you_

_Do good for those who hate_

_Forgive, if not forget_

_I know it's not too later_

_Forgive me, and you'll discover too_

_That love of your love is you_


	54. Iridescent

**Disclaimer: So far, nothing belongs to me, except for the concept of this story. Song by Linkin Park.**

_And in a burst of light_

_That blinded every angle_

_As if the sky had blown_

_The heavens into stars_

_You felt the gravity of tempered grace_

_Falling into empty sky_

_No one there to catch you_

_In their arms_

"_How did you find me?" Renesmee questioned in an airy voice, glancing around the remodeled Cave of Fear. Knick-knacks were placed all over the walls—porcelain dolls, vases with odd flower patterns, black and white portraits of a family. "Well?"_

"_I have always been watching over my son and his family," the bronze-haired woman, the older of the two, spoke softly. _

"_You have always kept your distance until now," she replied out fairly, tracing the white edges of her fingernails upon the frigid outline of her expression. Her father had this woman's startling beautiful face; she has this woman's face. "Why?"_

"_It's safer for everyone if I stay away, but that does not mean I haven't had any difficulties in keeping my distance—whenever my son was in pain, whenever your mother faced great peril, and now you. My granddaughter," this strange woman elucidated, sitting down at a round table that should have been dressed in white linen that could have been topped with a magic crystal ball. _

"_You ignored your own family. There's no excuse," Nessie hissed resentfully._

"_Isn't there?" Elizabeth rolled her eyes, very much like Edward would have. "I have a complicated life."_

"_So, I've heard," Nessie muttered sarcastically under her breath._

"_With every person that I heal, my life is slowly willed away. I'm not certain about how much longer I will be alive," Elizabeth said as Nessie continued to glance around the small environment, never once making eye contact with her grandmother._

"_What does that have to do with anything? How does that make up for the fact you were never there for your son for most of his life?" Renesmee inquired, dusting off a picture of a baby, who had a toothless smile plastered on his happy expression, but appeared to be squirming to break free from the female arms that held him close. _

"_Our destinies are too different," Elizabeth retorted gently. "What could I do for him with only a physical presence? Give life back while he continues to take it away? I could never be the cause of such guilt in Edward."_

"_You're his mother," the youngest Cullen countered, not truly knowing if this growing anger was for her father or for herself. _

"_And make no mistake, young lady, I was never too far behind when my son truly needed me most," Elizabeth said, lowering her tone darkly—practically in warning._

"_But you haven't lifted a finger!" Nessie shouted, the rumbling of her voice caused the cave walls to tremble; one of the weird vases fell from a shelf and shattered to pieces. _

"_Who do you think left a trail back to Carlisle Cullen for Edward to follow after he strayed into the path of cold-blooded killing? Who do you think tipped Edward off when James had your mother trapped in a ballet studio?" Elizabeth exclaimed, just as irritated as Renesmee was. "Who do you think let Alice know that other hybrids like you exist?"_

"_You did. . . But why?"_

"_Family. I love my family."_

"_Why show yourself now?"_

"_Because of Jacob Black."_

"_What about my Jacob?"_

"_He still has a significant destiny to fulfill in this lifetime," Elizabeth replied when Renesmee finally took a seat; her eyes of pure emerald met Nessie's milk chocolate ones. "That destiny has always been you—to love you in earnest the only way he would know how to. Ever since his birth, you were always the destination his many crossroads would lead to. Ever since your birth, his obligation in life has always been to ensure your protection. True love. There is not greater destiny than that."_

"_We're imprints," Nessie nodded nervously, twiddling her restless thumbs. "Soul mates."_

"_Once a very long time ago, I had the power to save my husband," Elizabeth deliberated in a kind, slow murmur. "Only hours before he died, your grandfather said to me that my life was far more precious than his—that cheating his own death would take away from a great destiny, from my destiny and now yours." Her dark eyebrows furrowed. "Not a day has gone by in nearly a century where I wish I hadn't listened to him."_

"_Then you must already know I'm willing to do whatever it takes to keep Alice's vision from coming true," Renesmee said, and let out a heavy, burdened exhale. Her rich, dessert-filled irises solidified, dangerous and determined. _

"_I can help you, Renesmee," Elizabeth Masen offered, "but saving lives comes with a heavy cost. Tell me something," she started, pulling out a long contract paper, "What are you willing to sign away?_

_Renesmee arched an eyebrow, taking away the lengthy document in her hands, and read it over at least three times. "I. . . We'll forget about each other, what we mean. . ."_

_How could she? Just give away all that she and Jacob meant to each other. . . It wasn't an easy decision to make—that is, if she could—but Jacob's life was a hundred times more important than hers. If she died tonight and Faethra survived their final encounter, this would ensure Jacob would live no matter what. _

_He would hate her for doing this, just as she might if he had done this instead, but there was however a chance he wouldn't even remember who she was. Could she betray him this way? Nessie genuinely contemplated it for moments if she was capable of this immeasurable sort of courage, her heart inwardly breaking at the possibility of spending her life without Jacob—of having no memories of him._

"_I would have to give him up completely. . . Everything."_

"_Yes," Elizabeth retorted gently, taking her granddaughter's hands into her own in attempt to be consoling, but Nessie rejected her immediately._

"_I don't know," Renesmee muttered sadly. _

_This was a huge decision. If she actually signed it, she would be irrational. If she didn't sign it, she would be irrational. It was not a lose-win situation she wanted to deal with._

"_Ultimately, it's your decision," Elizabeth replied, shrugging. _

"_We won't remember each other." That's all Nessie knew for certain. "Will Jacob be happy?"_

_The former Missus Masen looked as if she was getting ready to shake her head in response, but suddenly stopped. "I can't promise you that, Renesmee, but I can promise that I will always keep him out of harm's way."_

"_How?"_

"_I'll find a way."_

"_I do love Jacob a great deal," Nessie said, withdrawing her hands and rested them in her lap. "I just wish I could give him a better chance at life." She knew what she was losing by just forfeiting her life with Jacob, but more so, Nessie knew what she was stealing from him. He loved her; but if not with her, Jacob still deserved to experience the power of true love. _

"_Does your husband know what you love him?" Elizabeth inquired, slightly tilting her head to the right. _

"_I tell him every day," Nessie responded, grimacing as she quickly recalled her goodbye to Jacob this morning. "I told him every day," she mended. _

"_Words aren't always enough."_

"_I would die for him," Nessie answered, resting her head on the edge of the table in exhaustion, "but I know how much that would break him apart."_

"_How willing are you to do that, Renesmee?" Elizabeth asked, getting up from her seat. "Yes, he will be safe from the golden hind, but he will still be living a half life."_

"_What is it you're trying to convince me of?" Nessie queried, suspiciously arching an eyebrow at her grandmother. _

"_The right thing."_

"_Which is?"_

"_If I had enough power to do so, I would turn back the hands of time and save my husband," Elizabeth imagined aloud, with her left hand resting over her chest, as her candy-sweet voice pierced the dull air. "But I know that is never going to be possible. My love wasn't enough to save him. Because Ned loved me so much, he ended up saving my life instead."_

"_I'm sorry," Nessie apologized, lifting her head up. Although, it was nice to hear of the love her grandmother shared with her grandfather, it didn't make her feel any less confused about what she should do. _

"_For the most part, your grandfather was a reserved man. Well-composed. That's where your father gets it from," Elizabeth smiled in thought to herself. It was a kind and gentle smile._

_Renesmee nodded, shrugging nonchalantly. She combed her delicate fingers through her soft, auburn tendrils. "At least you two had a son together, one that you loved very much. Jacob and I might not ever get that chance." No. She couldn't think like this. Their love could part oceans, defy gravity, and shove mountains out the way. _

_Her grandmother gestured to the long document, "Well, here it is. If you think your love can defy any obstacle, even amnesia, signing this contract will help you no matter what."_

"_Okay," Nessie nodded as her grandmother handed her a sharp comb from her reddish-brownish hair. "I do have faith in our love. After all, we made a promise to each other years ago. We'll find each other."_

"_For a young woman, you hold immense spirit," Elizabeth said, reaching out for her young granddaughter's hand. This time, Renesmee accepted._

"_It must be something that runs in the family," Nessie retorted, giving a lost member of her family a tender, earnest compliment. _

"_Possibly," Elizabeth shrugged and laughed, but still shook her head. "Renesmee, it's okay to be afraid of dying."_

"_I'm not afraid of dying for myself," Nessie immediately responded, "but for my Jacob. At least this way, I won't be dead for too long." _

_If she knew Jacob—and she did—he would search for Elizabeth endlessly, and restart the entirety of the past eight years. Come hell or high water, he would never accept her death, the same way she would never accept his. After all, this contract clearly stated that both of their signatures were required in order for the magic to take full affect. _

"_That's right," Elizabeth confirmed, nodding in agreement. _

_A nervous breath was expelled out of Renesmee's system, shaking throughout the chambers of her throbbing heart. She glanced at her grandmother in search for the right thing to do here, as if she wasn't already aware. All she could do was think of Jacob, if he would ever come to understand that her love for him was a force of nature to be reckoned with. Faethra wouldn't win if she had anything to say about it; she wouldn't let Faethra destroy a bond so steel-based, not even death was powerful enough to see it crumble. With that in mind, Nessie pricked her index finger with the comb and squeezed a small drop of her blood on the contract._

"_By the way, Jacob likes black coffee. Make sure he gets it."_

* * *

><p>Nessie withdrew her palms from Jacob's cheeks, both heated in sorrow. Tears, staining the white of his eyes pink, streamed down the sides of his russet face. His breath shattered to pieces, realizing where that vision would have ended up taking him. There was a part of him that wanted to know, to see what happened through her eyes. He realized that thought might have been too much. A tight knot swelled up in the back of his throat, threatening to choke him to death. His stomach churned like a thrashing ocean as if he was about to be sick. But that didn't stop his curiosity from shining through as he returned Nessie's hands, which trembled in fright, into his palms.<p>

"Don't stop, Nessie," Jacob whispered, dragging the tip of his thumb along the center of her hand. "I still want to see."

"No, you don't," the half-human half-vampire girl replied, shaking her head to and from.

The shape-shifter gently smiled, positioning his lips on the porcelain hue of Renesmee's cheek; it seemed the simple gesture elicited a nervous reaction from the hummingbird-like beat of her sweet heart. "I do, Nessie. I can forgive you for signing off on your own death, but I still need to know the rest."

"Please, I don't want to," Nessie said, taking three steps backward and accidentally hit the wall. Her shaking fingers covered her mouth, stifling a light gasp.

"Come here," Jacob gestured her forward, but her feet remained utterly glued to the ground in fear.

In fact, his Renesmee appeared to look like a tragically beautiful painting. Her long, autumn springs of perfect hair cascaded down over each shoulder, tracing thinly at the outline of her clothed breasts. Her face glistened with tears of pure sorrow, pouring down her flushed cheeks. The sad, pink color smeared across the alabaster shade, as she embraced her arms around herself. Little, darkened strands of hair clung to her wet cheeks, while her heartbeat faltered—the rhythm, as soft as it was, pounded as though it would break. Jacob almost didn't want to smudge her beauty by reaching out to her, but Nessie wasn't actually a painting.

So smudge her, he would.

"Nessie. . ." Jacob murmured, extending his left arm to reach for Nessie.

"You shouldn't be the one comforting me," she said, swiping a small teardrop from her eyelashes.

"Stop that," Jacob retorted sullenly, and walked with stammering footsteps over to her side. "Nessie, don't do this to yourself. There is no reason for you to feel guilty."

"I don't feel guilty," Renesmee replied, emitting a small sniffle.

"Then what's wrong?" Jacob questioned, and put his hands on the slim slopes of her shoulders. "Talk to me, beautiful."

"I died, Jacob," Renesmee whispered almost as if she didn't quite believe it—or maybe she didn't want to. Her milk chocolate orbs flickering all over Jacob's face. "That's kind of a big deal. I died, and the next thing I remember is that you were no longer a part of my life. That's the only part I regret, but I had no other choice."

"We both decided on that," he stated, not in an accusatory manner, but matter-of-factually.

"And it turned out the way I hoped it would," Renesmee added, "but. . .it almost didn't."

With a tight grimace on Jacob's masculine face, he closed the final distance between him and his wonderfully brave imprint. Then, he fell upon his knees, encircling his toned arms around her slender waist. His lips gave Nessie's stomach three, quick kisses. Slowly rising up to his feet, Jacob kissed a straight path up to her neck. Jacob kept having to remind himself that Nessie was actually here, with him in real life. She wasn't just an invention from a collection of his best dreams. And it just felt so right to have her in his arms, her body all soft and warm.

"What are you doing?" Nessie queried, her head tilted to the side. An amused smile spread across the contours of her lips.

"I'm trying to make up for the time we lost," Jacob retorted, lying more pecks on her cheeks.

Giggling, Nessie pulled back on her hands nervously. "Quit trying to butter me up."

The half-human half-vampire woman expelled an affectionate sigh, gently pushing aside Jacob's arms so she could rest her head on his chest. He grinned to himself, cupping the back of her head with his left hand while his right skimmed down the side of her body. Nessie smiled against his chest—the sensation of her soft lips moving against his t-shirt warmed him—as she seeked out her comfort in the correct answer. Jacob appreciated that—they could still be themselves, even after all the time that has passed.

Faethra had caused her fair share of damage, but she still had not managed to bring their love to shambles like she hoped. No. If anything, their endless bond was strengthened by every obstacle she flung in their path, and now they could continue to grow even stronger.

"Thank you," the man-wolf hybrid mumbled, and kissed her bottom lip.

"I don't know what I did, but you're very welcome," Nessie laughed, her disposition still nervous, as she studied Jacob's face.

"Show me. I can take it," Jacob requested once again. He brought Nessie over to the couch and sat her down on his lap, allowing her to shift around until she was comfortable. "We're here together now. No memories you show me will change that."

"Are you sure this is something you absolutely want to see?"

"Positive."

"If I show you now, there's no going back."

"I'm ready."

"All right, Jacob. You win."

"I always do."

. . .

_Renesmee remained hidden in the shadows, perched on the top branch of a mighty oak tree as the last golden hind came into view, glancing around every inch of the emptied forest—except up. She studied Faethra cautiously, the golden body of a true, fierce, and beautiful predator. Dangerous._

_Faethra's precariously narrowed features were sculpted from absolute sorrow and deeply rooted pain, pain that must have torn out a heart that was once good. Nessie genuinely felt sorry for her enemy—how sad it must have been to live with the knowledge that she was the last of her species. She was alone in this world, empty of company that could have made her smile, all because of Nessie, whom had killed Faethra's sister. But there was no way for Nessie to right that wrong, with the possible exception of putting Faethra out of her misery once and for all; but it wasn't in Renesmee Black's gentle nature to take a life in cold blood. _

_This was for Jacob. _

"_Come out, come out wherever you are!" the golden hind sang out, sitting down patiently on her back legs. _

_The half-human half-vampire jumped down from the branch and onto the slippery ground, crouching low. "I am done hiding from you."_

"_Finally." Faethra laughed maliciously, a maniacal sparkle wavered in her flaxen eyes. "Do you know how much work I had to do to get you to show yourself, vampire? It's been nothing but work, work, work for months! I'm utterly exhausted."_

"_I will not let you kill anymore people I love, Faethra, especially not Jacob," Nessie stated, daring to stand upright. "It's time you and I end this."_

"_Fine. I couldn't agree more," the golden hind replied, her jaw locked ferociously. "All you have to do for me is die. Simple business, really."_

"_If you think I won't fight you until my last breath, you are mistaken," Renesmee warned, folding her arms over her chest. She was terrified of dying, of being with Jacob. With the way she left him, she figured she didn't have much time to resolve this conflict. _

"_Put up a fight," the blonde deer challenged casually, forcing a thin smile. "It makes no never mind to me."_

"_Does anything matter to you?"_

"_I'm afraid not."_

"_Not even your family?"_

"_They're all dead."_

"_But what about the memories you must have of them?"_

"_Burdens. I refuse to live in the past."_

"_Then for that, I am truly sorry."_

"_You slaughtered my sister," she growled fiercely, her voice shattering in odd places. _

"_She was going to kill my husband. I didn't have much of a choice," Nessie explained for what felt like the millionth time._

"_No excuse you give me will bring her back," Faethra hissed under her breath, blinking back tears. "Do you know what your precious ancestors have done to me? Do you?" she questioned, glancing toward the ground. "For sport, they plagued my entire kind with death—my mate, my sons and daughters. All of my kind, all of my family! I have no choice but to die alone someday, and I swear you will suffer the same destiny."_

"_I'm sorry, Faethra," Nessie muttered honestly, shaking her head to and fro. "I'm sorry nothing seems to matter to you anymore."_

"_Maybe one thing does matter to me," Faethra retorted threateningly, adding on a small snarl. "My revenge."_

"_What makes you so sure you'll succeed?"_

"_Hate is strong."_

"_Love is stronger."_

"_The only better way to exact my vengeance is to kill your precious Jacob like the mongrel he is," Faethra sneered mockingly, her Cheshire Cat-like grin sending a nervous chill through Renesmee's skin, "or should I say was?"_

"_You'll never lay a hand on him," Nessie warned, her crackling mahogany irises smoking like a terrible black fire. _

"_Won't I?" the golden hind challenged, her mouth brightening into a fiendish smirk that dripped with over-confidence. "He'll be ripe for onslaught once I rid you from this world."_

"_You don't know anything about him," Nessie spat, glowering darkly._

"_Oh, dear child, I do," Faethra answered, drawing out a single arrow. She lightly pricked at the edge of her index finger, then held it out for Renesmee to catch a sniff—and her blood did smell great. Mouth-watering. "I am not blinded to all the pathetic woes of true love. I have been upon this world since fools thought it was a flat surface, far longer than your insolent family. I watch mankind rise from the ashes of the old world, and I bonded with them to fight the oppression of your kind. Oh, yes. I have seen true love, dismembered it myself on an occasion or two. I know enough about it weakness. You and your dog are not so different."_

"_Prepare to be extremely disappointed," Renesmee said, shifting the dirt around beneath her feet as water started to trickle down from the heavens. _

"_Never again. I swear you'll die, then him."_

"_I am capable of so much more than you know."_

"_I doubt it," Faethra snarled, shrugging nonchalantly. "You are the bearer of your own love's twilight. You are the only I know one capable of such foolishness."_

"_Tell yourself that," Nessie countered._

"_Both of you will end. I promise you."_

_Nessie slowly turned and knelt down upon one knee, pulling up at the sleeve of her converse shoe. "Over my dead body," she muttered, rolling her eyes._

"_With pleasure!" Faethra growled, charging the first arrow at the unsuspecting half-breed._

_The young hybrid heard the whistle of Faethra's signature weapon whistle through the wind and swiftly turned back around in that same second. She reached out her right hand, grasping the center of arrow's skinny length, snapped it in half like a twig, and tossed the broken edges at Faethra's shoulders. As Faethra swatted the torn arrow away, Nessie slipped out a long, sharp claw from a wolf, the only weapon that could fatally injure the golden hind. _

_She leapt up into the air and front-flipped, her heels crashing down on the center of the deer's back. Faethra's muscles cracked as her voice emitted a shrill scream, bucking around like an untamed bull. Renesmee fell down on the side of her back, hooves smashing and scraping her porcelain face—until it was covered in crimson and black. But she didn't have any time to focus on the pain screaming through out the nerves of her body, the hurt shooting up her spine, as Faethra aimed another arrow at Nessie's heart. Quickly locking her strong ankles around Faethra's left front leg and flipped over, sending the deer's head to hit the hard ground. _

_Yelping like an injured puppy, Faethra shot up as soon as Nessie hauled herself to her feet. The golden hind sneered frustratedly, whipping her head around. Renesmee used the wolf's claw, fashioned into a black-bladed dagger, to slice a burgundy line down Faethra's yellow stomach, but the wound was barely enough to momentarily distract her. A dangerous light twinkled in her honey irises, filled with a brand new sense of determination, while Renesmee kicked the arrow out of Faethra's hand. The flaxen doe screeched and struggled, latching her nimble hands around the half-breed's throat and flung her into the nearest tree like a ragdoll. Faethra wasted no time in pinning Nessie down to the dusty floor, stapling down the younger woman's shoulders with her front hooves. Her knife-like fingernails dug deep into her scalp, ruthlessly gripping onto roots of silky copper, and twisted round on her head; but Nessie's neck did not break. _

_The skywater cried a little harder when the half-human half-vampire stole a second to drive the bloody wolf's claw through Faethra's underbelly. Stumbling back in surprise, the golden hind's beautiful eyes expanded, but Renesmee was up in the next second. Slashing the claw through Faethra's chest, she exhaled softly—in relief. Yet still, salty tears burned into the girl's reddened and ripped flesh. Faethra sunk to her four knees, shock written all over tragic features, as she lied down on her side. _

_Kneeling down beside her, Nessie grasped the golden hind's cold hand and spoke softly, "Let go, Faethra. It's all right. You don't have to be angry anymore."_

_Nodding to Renesmee in confusion of her compassion, Faethra closed her eyes. It didn't take long for her breath to hitch, and then stop altogether. It was over._

_Covered in dirt and wounds, Nessie arose from the forest floor to go home, to her Jacob. She limped and flinched with every step, knowing that Carlisle would demand to see her right away. But she didn't get very far, when all over a sudden, the same weapon, doused in hind's blood, she had used on Faethra was launched into her ankle. Everything passed by in slow motion. With a final step forward, almost refusing to believe what was happening, she collapsed to her broken knees. Glancing over her shoulders in fear, Nessie saw the dying deer reach out, her flaxen fingers out-stretched._

"_Now I don't have to die alone."_

_A heartbroken cry pierced the forest breeze, resonating throughout the trees as Renesmee crashed on the front side of her body. She plucked the wolf's claw from her ankle and threw it away from her side in disgust. "No! Jacob!" Nessie was paralyzed underneath the gray rain, turned into a vegetable by the poisonous blood pulsating through her veins. All she could do was stare blankly ahead, feeling her skin grow could like the Arctic icebergs; but she never stopped clutching the million steel capable of life as thoughts of Jacob Black swam through her mind—of the moment their eyes first met and every time since then. Her heartbeat slowed, thumping at the walls of chest, and finally gave a final beat. Now, remnants of her brain and soul lingered upon the earth._

_A pale figure, like a vision of mercy, appeared through the dozens of trees. Her gorgeous topaz irises were dressed in terrible worry, but was soon replaced with sorrowful realization. "No!" Bella Cullen, her mother, yelled out into the window. She scooped the nearly lifeless body into her icy-cold arms and began to rock her body back and forth, cradling Renesmee close._

_Renesmee wished that her eardrums could be torn out at the sounds of her mother's dry sobs. The sounds alerted a copper-toned man, who immediately swept her exhausted figure into his warm arms. He grunted and yelled, pleading with Bella to change her into a full-blooded vampire, only to discover that it was much too later for that option. Jacob furrowed his eyebrow, concentrating on Nessie's drained expression, and begged once more for her to come back to him—that all she had to do was open her eyes, then he would take her to Carlisle and everything would be all right. _

_No._

_This couldn't be true._

_Nessie's eyes, the chocolate vibrance fading, examined the strained contours of her husband's handsome expression. She wanted to speak to him once more, to simply assure him that everything would be okay. He didn't have to feel any pain in his soul over this; she only desired to soothe the ache in his dark eyes as they drowned in tears. Her Jacob. . . His face disappeared as she slipped in and out of consciousnesses. _

_Someone tugged Nessie by the hand and guided her into a gentle glow of light, as if she were traveling through a star. Although she protested with every step of the way, the stranger warmly chuckled and assured her that she was always safe in his presence. In her memory, as Nessie showed Jacob what she could barely remember of after-life, the details on this stranger were fuzzy. All she could remember was that his smile was as kind as Jacob's and that he told her a magnificent story. Eventually, he gave her a name, but it was too difficult to recall. Something that started with an 'A.'_

_Do you feel cold_

_And lost in desperation?_

_You build up hope_

_But failures all you've ever known_

_Remember all the sadness_

_And frustration_

_And let it go_

_Let it go_


	55. Still Into You

**Disclaimer: Nothing belongs to me. This song is by Paramore and has been stuck in my head for the past three days. **

_Can't count on the years one hand_

_That we've been together_

_I need the other one to hold you_

_To make you feel, make you feel better_

_It's not a walk in the park to love each other_

_But when our fingers interlock_

_Can't deny, can't deny_

_You're worth it_

_'Cause after all this time, I'm still into you_

_Impatiently tapping the heel of her foot against the bottom edge of the wall, Renesmee crossed her slender arms over her chest, and waited for one of her family members to say something. Her grandfather, Carlisle Cullen, had announced that it was time for a family meeting, so that he could update them on their status in Tacoma. Renesmee, however, had a strong suspicion that she wouldn't end up enjoying today's discussion—particularly when there was a million other things she would rather be doing. All the same, Edward forced the youngest Cullen out of her room and ordered her to get downstairs. _

"_We will probably have to relocate pretty soon," Doctor Cullen reported from his seat on the black leather sofa. Esme smiled kindly toward her husband, resting a hand upon his knee. "People are beginning to notice that I have not aged."_

_Bella frowned regretfully. "That's a shame."_

"_I really love Tacoma," Renesmee said, furrowing an eyebrow. "La Push isn't too far away, so I can see Leah whenever I want."_

_Edward sighed, putting a sympathetic hand to his daughter's shoulder. "We know, baby girl, but we'll scout for some place that will be our new home, somewhere that you'll enjoy just as much."_

_The eight year-old going on eighteen shrugged at her father, then gazed at the pale face of her grandfather. "Grandpa, do you think we could move back to Forks?" After all, Forks had been her first home. It's where all of her childhood memories were stored. _

"_It's only been a few years, sweetheart. Not enough time has passed," Carlisle answered, adorning a mournful expression—grimacing in truth that his information would not make his only granddaughter pleased. "It is too soon to move back."_

"_People would notice," Esme submitted._

"_Like Mike Newton," Edward muttered to Bella under his breath, giving her his typical crooked smile. She snickered in response._

"_This sucks," Renesmee whined, moving away from the wall. _

_Rosalie draped an arm over her god-daughter's warm shoulders in a side hug. "Cheer up, Ren," the blonde vampire smiled affectionately. "Think about it this way—there will be a whole new selection of boys for you to win over."_

"_Yeah, right," Renesmee agreed sardonically, snorting as she lifted her aunt's arm off her. "Human boys."_

"_So what?" Emmett questioned._

"_So what!" Renesmee repeated incredulously, throwing her arms in the air defeatedly. Edward chuckled at her dramatics. "I'm a freak show! Human boys either can't control their globs of drool or they're frightened to death of me! I can only ever fit in with the wolves." Despite their constant teasing at her half-vampire status, at least they treated her like an actual person—not that she was attracted to any of them. _

"_Chill out, bro," Emmett chortled, snatching Renesmee away from Rosalie. He gave her a condescending pat on the head. "It just means that you'll get to spend the rest of your life, which is forever, with us!"_

"_Mo-om!" Renesmee whimpered. Her lower lip jutted out in a pout, as she retreated into the comfort of her mother's immediate embrace. _

_Emmett arched an eyebrow in perplexity. "Was it something I said?"_

"_It's okay, baby," Bella laughed indulgently, combing her marble digits through her daughter's reddish-brownish tendrils. "Listen to me—how about you go to Seattle and check out the area for us?"_

_Renesmee grumbled in annoyance, taking a stride backward from her mother—a bit let down about the lack of consolance she was receiving. "Seattle? Is that where we're moving?"_

"_Maybe," Bella retorted. "We'll see in about a year."_

_The teenager's shoulder slumped exaggeratedly, despair tinging in her muscles. "My life is over in a year?"_

"_Don't be so dramatic, Renesmee Carlie," Edward teasingly scolded, wagging an index finger in her direction. _

"_Fine," Renesmee sighed, giving in to Bella's outrageous task. "I'll go, but I won't like it!"_

"_Give it a chance, baby girl," Rosalie advised, sliding her flaxen tresses behind the flat shell of her ear. "This could end up being a great day for you."_

"_I doubt it," Renesmee mumbled, heading toward the door._

"_Wait, honey!" Esme called. "Do you want a spot of breakfast before you take off?"_

"_No, thank you," Renesmee replied, slightly dropping her attitude when addressing her grandmother. She rarely could muster the heart to be grumpy when it came to speaking with Esme. "I'm gonna see if I can find something to eat in Seattle," she finished, grabbing her handbag from the coat rack. _

"_Going to," Edward corrected her._

_Rolling her eyes in agitation, Renesmee muttered a bitter, "Whatever."_

"_No! Nuh-uh, young lady. Come here right now," Rosalie assertively beckoned, crooking a demanding finger._

_Renesmee reluctantly trudged her led-filled feet over to her aunt, her head hanging down—irritated at everyone suddenly treating her like a slave girl. "What?" she queried, her tone weighed down with annoyance._

"_Smile," Rosalie commanded, tilting Renesmee's chin up to look at her properly; she smiled awkwardly. "Like you mean it." The half-breed thought of the gentle crash of the ocean waves against the shore of First Beach, and she somewhat felt better. "Atta girl. Try to make this a good experience for yourself. Find something about Seattle to love."_

"_Do I have to?" Renesmee sighed, finding it hard to believe that Seattle would have anything she would take interest in._

"_Yes, you do."_

_. . ._

_Leave it to the extraordinary Rosalie Hale to be right about everything._

_Because she was definitely right about Seattle. _

_For a good measure of the morning, Renesmee strolled around random avenues, just wandering blankly around on a quest for something—anything—that would spark her intrigued nature; but so far, the dreary streets of Seattle continued to remind her that she would soon be moving away from Leah, from her friends, from her life, and from everything she had grown fond of in Tacoma. Of course, at the time, she was unaware that the journey she was on would turn out to be a blessing in disguise. _

_After a few hours of aimless traveling, the half-breed's feet began to exhaust from all the walking she had done, and her stomach growled from hunger pains. It was time to stop and take a break. By a convenient stroke of luck, Renesmee happened upon a humble-looking cafe. In the window, she saw two people engaged in a friendly conversation. One was a female human with her vibrant, strawberry blonde locked tied back into a tight ponytail. She laughed at something her companion said, her cinnamon eyes sparkling chipperly. The other one, the man, was toned in copper muscles that bulged even while he was merely sitting down._

_Upon gazing at the pair of strangers, the half-human half-vampire's feet started to move weightlessly at their own accord, onward into the cafe for a bit of breakfast. Before Renesmee somehow made herself aware of what she was doing, her hands were already pushing open the restaurant's door, causing a stringed-up bell to ring and announce her entrance. The sound sent a shock throughout her body, bring her mind back to the present. _

_Still, she continued to stare at the russet stranger from the corner of her eyes, now able to get a better look at him. He was blessed with a charming appearance—cropped hair the brilliant color of fresh midnight that held a soft hue of indigo in the dulls rays of the sun; his bronze skin seemed utterly smooth, almost flawless—almost as if she were to touch his arm, it would be the equivalent of encountering wet silk; his smile was an element far beyond this world, as his lips pulled back blindingly, the light of his glee like magic. Renesmee caught the quickest glimpse of his glistening pearly whites and she realized that, indeed, this man's smile was where his personality, his beauty, could be found. _

_Her heart smiled with, thundering as if. . . as if she were falling in love with him at first sight._

_Renesmee's reaction to a simple, nameless face when she realized that he, too, was gazing back at her with a pair of eyes the magnificent color of the forest drenched in a light sprinkle of rain. A knot swelled up in her stomach—or maybe she was experiencing her first case of butterflies. She felt almost sickened, but in a good way as both sets of brown eyes made contact. Then, Renesmee mused silently that the Cullen coven should move to Seattle right this instant. No questions asked. _

"_Hello, Miss!" an over-eager waiter exclaimed, grinning as bright as the day._

"_Oh, hello," Renesmee replied gently, managing a half-hearted simper in return._

"_Are you expecting your boyfriend to join you any time soon?" the waiter inquired curiously, pulling out a menu from the stand adjacent to him._

"_No," she answered nervously. "No boyfriend. Just me."_

"_Good," he remarked, quirking a bushy eyebrow at Renesmee, and she desperately wanted to lurch. He seated Renesmee immediately, not too far from the off-duty waitress and her tan-skinned friend. "Do you know what you'll be having or would you like some time to think it over?"_

"_Sweet tea and a blueberry muffin would be divine," she replied, handing back the food menu._

"_Your order will be coming right up."_

"_Thank you."_

_Pulling out a romance novel from her designer handbag carefully, Renesmee opened up the book in the center. Her brown eyes scanned the pages, settling herself comfortable in the wobbly chair. She listened closely to the discussion going on between the—what she assumed—couple diagonal from her, but the young gentleman was distracted as the waitress jabbered on for miles. In fact, he seemed to be distracted by her, Renesmee Cullen. His beautiful, black-brown eyes were fixated on the younger girl's bashful figure, studying her as if she had had two heads growing from her shoulders._

"_Of course fairly priced jeans are hard to come by," the waitress said with an exasperated exhale; though she had been originally speaking about a new pair of shoes. "Not that I think you care at all when you're making googly eyes with your girlfriend over there."_

_Ducking her head down to conceal her cherry-stained cheeks behind the the book, Renesmee couldn't help but smile. _

_The man's right eyebrow climbed up his forehead in faux defense, his sun-kissed expression plastered with a boyish playfulness that Renesmee's heart could have jumped upon. "Hey, I'm listening. I'm just suddenly distracted."_

"_Spare me the details of your new-found attraction lover boy," the blondish busgirl teased in a tone that conveyed her sweetness as she rolled her pretty, cinnamon eyes. "It's super obvious Miss Priss is out of your league." _

_Renesmee contorted her face in disagreement. Yes, she was decked out in a casual, albeit designer, clothing since it was the typical Cullen style—or rather, Alice's style—but that didn't make her think anyone was inferior. Although, maybe it was a bad idea to wear a cashmere sweater today, but she was not a snob. She would never presume to believe that she was superior to any stranger who might have worn a simple t-shirt. _

"_I've gotta get back to work anyway," the girl stated and stood up from the booth-for-two, using her hands to dust off the uniform apron dressed on her attire. "Just finish your breakfast. If you stay any longer, I'm afraid your obese butt will leave a permanent indent on the seat."_

_The tan man huffed out sarcastically, rolling his eyes. "Eight years I've known you, and now you tell me that my ass is big?" Renesmee sniggered inaudibly to herself. "Well, you know what? Your face reminds me of an ugly fish!"_

"_You jackass!" his probably girlfriend exclaimed, expelling loud, heartfelt laughter as she slapped him over the head. Renesmee's stomach knotted in terror—in jealousy. "Fine! I hate you, too!"_

"_Join the club!" he hollered in reply as the waitress stuck out her middle finger, walking over to another table. _

"_Is that your age or I.Q.?"_

_Unable to to hold back the bubble of laughter swelling in the pit of her stomach, a faint giggle burst from her lips. The light carried over to the next table, causing the stranger to glance over in curiosity. Renesmee, with her heart nervously skipping a beat, turned her chocolate gaze downward, and finally flipped to the next page in her novel. _

_Geesh. What was her problem? Renesmee Cullen was a confident, young, and vibrant woman and no man had every rendered her to mush before. What made him so different?_

"_Here you go, Miss," the young busboy announced, lying down her breakfast on the circular table, "your blueberry muffin and sweet tea. May I get anything else or you?" he questioned, leaning over the opposite edge of the table. Inaudibly, she gulped and tugged up at the neck of her sweater in an effort to cover the twins. "It would be my pleasure to help you out," he finished suggestively._

_She forced a grateful smile up at him, trying not to vomit at his blatant advances. "Thank you," Renesmee retorted casually, "but as of right now, I'm enjoying my book."_

"_Oh, really?" he asked indulgently, not caring a lick about proper literature. He looked more accustomed to trashy Playboy magazines. "What's it about?"_

_A content sigh was liberated from her stomach as she silently mused upon what she would say, and smiled to herself. "True love," Renesmee replied, shrugging her shoulders in sheepishness. A strand of her bronze hair was blinding her right eye, and she swept it back behind her ear. "It's really cheesy stuff."_

"_Chick-flick bullshit in a book, huh?" the waiter asked bluntly._

_A tight frown crossed the corner of the half-human half-vampire's mouth; the fowl language from every day humans wasn't anything she was unused to, considering the wolves she was frequently surrounded by could hardly be called gentlemen, but she never heard a curse word dropped in polite public. "I-I-I suppose."_

_Finally, both sets of brown eyes mingled—this time unabashedly on purpose. Try as she might, she wanted to avert her kind irises from the ever-handsome face of a man she couldn't put a name to yet, but should have. His mouth twitched into a smile that would put Prince Charming to shame—the cutest set of dimples she had ever seen poked in his russet cheeks. Right then, Renesmee should have figured out his identity; she had looked upon that heart-warming grin countless times in Billy Black's family albums hundreds of times. _

_But today, she was clueless._

_All of a sudden the flirtatious busboy walked away, his feet stomping down frustratedly on the tiled ground. He began mumbling under his breath, unaware of her superhuman hearing ability. "Fine, be that way. Let her be a bookreading slut. See if I care. . . Her loss." And with his face reddened in malice, the busboy slipped behind the kitchen door. _

_And for just a fragment of a second—okay, possibly longer than just a second—Renesmee felt an electrical warmth bolt up her spine, straight through her veins, when the stranger's eyes, brown like autumn oak, flickered across the shapes of her face. He chuckled, traces of reluctance erased from his features, at the magenta color darkening Renesmee's cheeks._

_She liked that, the rich sound of this man's laughter and how it was abudant with sincerity—even if it was made at her own expense._

_Sliding a bookmark betwixt the novel's thin pages and closing it, the half-breed finally queried, "So how long is this stare down supposed to go on?"_

_He blinked as if his mind had been elsewhere. "Why?" he asked teasingly, slightly tilting his head. "Do you have something better to do?"_

"_That depends on who you ask," Renesmee grumbled, rolling her eyes at she was forced to come here today—not that she minded that fact anymore. "Personally, I could do this all day. How about you?"_

"_I'm game, lady," Dark-and-Handsome retorted smugly. "It happens to be my day off."_

"_Oh, lucky me!" she exclaimed in mocked glee, her eyes directing over to the busy busgirl, who she that was his girlfriend. "I don't want to make your waitress girlfriend jealous, however."_

"_No, no, no, no," he retorted instantly, waving his hand to and fro, and shook his head. _

_The youngest Cullen tapped a restless heel, confined in a lime-green converse shoe, against the metal leg of the chair she was seated in. She giggled, muffling the small sound behind the palm of her right hand. "I find it rather quaint that you're very eager to convince me she is of no romantic intrigue to you, even though we've barely just met."_

_He chuckled, raising his hands to indicate her point. "You caught me," the copper stranger agreed defeatedly. "But to be fair, you started flirting with me first." A delicious smirk, both handsome and smug, spread from cheek to cheek across this man's boyish face. As shallow as it may have seemed, he was easy on the eyes. "And you haven't asked me for my name either."_

_Renesmee criss-crossed her arms over her chest as her legs entwined, one over the other. "Come again?" she scoffed, blatantly joking with him. "I was just striking up a friendly conversation with a dapper gentleman, who is evidently unable to keep his eyes to himself."_

_He winked, and Renesmee nearly swooned on cue. "Sure, sure. So, do I get to learn your name?" _

_Arching an eyebrow, the way all Cullens did, Renesmee stood up from her seat and tossed her romance novel into her Prada handbag. Boldly marching over to the stranger's table, she channeled a streak of lightning confidence, which she greatly needed. "Tell you what," Renesmee bargained, "guess my name."_

"_Er. . . Rumpelstiltskin," he quipped gently. _

_Giggling, she replied, "No, but you're pretty close." She shrugged nonchalantly and shifted her footsteps around to get going. "Oh, well."_

"_Wait, hold on a second!" he called to her quickly before she was about to leave. Renesmee looked at him, studying the desperation etched in a face she should have recognized instantly in any reality. "Um, what-what is your name?"_

"_If I ever see you again, then I'll know you're worthy enough to know my name."_

"_Why am I not worthy now?"_

_It took her a human second to mull over her answer. "Because given the unlikely chances of us meeting once again tomorrow or thirty years from now, you'd forget my name anyway." It was a human quality to be forgetful, but it was also a quality of life that they would never see each other again—unless she stalked him. _

"_Is that some sort of rule you have, lady?"_

"_Yeah."_

"_Then, I'm the exception."_

"_Oh?" Renesmee inquired, inwardly grateful that he did, in fact, like her enough to at least want to see her another time. Her fisted hand knocked against the wooden surface of the table for good luck. "We shall see."_

_Purposely, Renesmee brushed the gentle tips of her fingers against the nameless man's russet knuckles. His skin felt familiar—warm, as if he had been bathing in pure sunlight all his life—like the wolves, rather the wolves she associated herself with. A breath hitched painfully in the back of her throat as fright consumed her tensing muscles. The rhythm of her heart quickened, roaring ferociously at Renesmee to escape this creature's sight as soon as possible. He was a shape-shifter, on that wasn't bound by the Quileute-Cullen Treaty; if he found out what she was, the nature of his blood would certainly compel him to slaughter her ruthlessly. They were natural enemies, and he didn't owe her anything._

_Renesmee jerked back on her hand, scared. "Who. . . Who are you?"_

_He grinned, unaware of the fact they were meant to kill each other. "Nope, you have to tell me your name first."_

"_Goodbye." And with that, Renesmee dashed out of the door of the cafe. By just being near this man, she was putting her life at risk. He could have killed her right there on the street and probably be discreet about it, too. _

"_Hey! Lady, wait!" the stranger yelled, following after her._

_Hesitant to turn around, the half-human half-vampire girl stopped on the sidewalk—dead in her tracks. The tone of the shape-shifter's voice had the twinge of an Alpha's command—deep and loud, the sound echoing through the farthest reaches of Renesmee's mind, possibly her memory; but she had never listened to the Alpha voice before. For some reason, this time was significantly different. This time, she wanted to listen. Perhaps she wanted a final glimpse of his beautiful face before she went about the rest of her life, never seeing him again, or maybe her soul knew—knew all along who he was, what he was and wasn't capable of, that he meant no harm. _

"_Wait. . ." he repeated, softening the mood of his tone as he caught up to her. _

_She turned around, her breath rattling nervously. "Yes?"_

"_You forgot your purse," he said, holding it up to her. "It looks expensive."_

"_Th-Th-Thank you," Renesmee stammered, hanging the purse strap off her shoulder. "That was nice of you. Very stand up and chivalrous."_

"_Sounds like me. Mister Wonderful," the man chuckled, his demeanor calm and friendly. He had no intention of putting her in danger. "Could I proposition you?"_

"_For what?" Renesmee queried, shifting the weight of her body from foot to foot. _

"_A date," he answered, dipping his hands into his pockets and squared off his shoulders. "If we should meet again, against all odds, I want to take you out to dinner or something. It may not be as fancy as you're used to, but I think it would be fun. You game?"_

"_Yes," Renesmee retorted gently, the pitter-patter of her heart picking up. She nibbled upon her lower lip, trying to fight the smile spreading across her mouth. "I would like that very much. Too bad the chances aren't in our favor."_

_He shrugged his mouth, nodding. "Hmm, too bad."_

"_Anyway. . ." Renesmee took four steps backward, careful not to bump into any strangers, as she waved a heartfelt farewell. "Thank you again, Dimples."_

"_See you around, Brown Eyes."_

_As Renesmee walked down the street, the face of the kind stranger swam through her mind. There was an element of his familiarity to his gleeful expression, something that she couldn't quite get out of her head. How could she recognize him, yet his identity remain so mysterious? Maybe he just had one of those faces that reminded everybody of somebody. No, no. That wasn't it. She had to have known him from somewhere else. Then, realization slammed down on her head. Renesmee had seen him before, a hundred times in the Black family albums, in old pictures her mother kept. Jacob Black. _

_She met Jacob Black. _

_. . ._

Jacob and Renesmee had been on the road for about fifty-five minutes with his clothes, packed in a few duffle bags and boxes, rustling around noisily in the trunk; but no one was paying that much attention to the background sounds. As for Jacob, all he could think about was Nessie's death—the full details. Now he knew exactly what happened from her point of view—how Faethra thrashed Nessie almost to a pulp, yet she almost escaped with her life intact. Almost. He couldn't blink without picturing how melancholy the forest seemed as the arrow dug into Renesmee's ankle. The sheer pain running through her veins. . . It illed him, the hurt rattling in his bones to know.

"Jacob. . ." Nessie murmured, gently padding her his right knee to obtain his attention. "Earth to Jacob!"

"Hmm?" he hummed flatly in response, his blackish brown irises eyes stuck to the empty, dark road.

"You and I have been on the road for an hour and you haven't said a single word to me," the half-breed pointed out, her hushed tone conveying her wounded feelings.

"Oh, I'm sorry, Nessie," Jacob apologized softly. He exhaled harshly, furrowing his eyebrow. "I'm just thinking."

Renesmee playfully tsked him, waving her index finger to and fro. "Too much thinking can be precarious, especially for you."

"Tell me about it," Jacob yawned, shrugging casually. "I'm giving myself a huge headache."

"What are you thinking about?" Nessie inquired, massaging Jacob's knee affectionately.

"You, of course."

"Duh. What about me?"

"Everything," Jacob retorted, his forest-brown orbs glaring blankly upon the road. "Mostly what you showed me. Every time I think of it, I feel like someone dropped a stone in my stomach."

"Oh, Jacob. . .," Nessie sighed sympathetically, retracting her hand. "I-"

"I know," he interceded, shaking his head. "In all fairness, you did warn me." His gazed flickered quickly over to his imprint, forcing a tight smile for her. "It's just that I already have my own memories to live with, but I wasn't fully prepared for yours, to cope with your memories, you know? I guess I really didn't know what I was asking for."

"Pull over, Jacob," Nessie commanded, crossing her arms over her chest. "Right now."

"What?"

"I said pull over, Jacob."

"Why?"

"Just do it."

"Okay."

What Nessie wanted is what Nessie got.

He pulled over to the side of the road into a small bundle of bushes, the silver shade of the various trees concealing the young couple from the dulling yellow rays of the sun. Jacob tugged the gear into park, shifting his body around in the driver's seat to properly face Renesmee, but he wasn't strong enough to bring himself to meet her eyes.

"Look at me, Jacob," Renesmee ordered. She curled her index finger under her russet chin, five o'clock shadow budding its way on his skin, and tilted his face up to hers. "Tell me why you're so focused on this. What's the problem?"

"It's what I always knew—I was too late," Jacob answered and choked back on the bulbous lump swelling in his throat. "You needed me and I wasn't there in time."

"That was my fault," Nessie told him.

"Yeah, well, I don't appreciate being drugged either," Jacob grinned ruefully, scratching the back of his neck.

"See? So, it wasn't your fault. I kept you away," Nessie replied, placing an apologetically chaste kiss on her former husband's bottom lip.

"I was just minutes too late," he retorted, his demeanor softening slightly at the lingering sensation of her healing lips. "Bella and I could have helped you. We could have saved you."

"Or both of you could have died right along with me, Jacob," Renesmee added in exclamation, rolling her eyes. "I wasn't going to take that chance, Jacob. Don't think about it anymore, okay?"

"How? Jacob questioned bemusedly, frustratedly banging his foot against the shut-off gas petal. "How can I do that, Nessie? I can't get it out of my head."

"Because, Jacob, it didn't happen," the half-human half-vampire woman said, her shell-pink mouth strained in a miniature smile for him. "Not really, anyway. You and I changed the past."

"I guess," Jacob agreed, biting down on the tip of his tongue.

"We have right now, Jacob, and we will have the rest of our lives together," Nessie replied promisingly, unbuckling the harness of her seatbelt. "We have the present."

"I don't know if I'm ever gonna get over this, Nessie," the shape-shifter confessed, cupping his beautiful girl's supple, porcelain cheek. "I keep thinking you'll poof into thin air."

"I'm here—right here," Nessie replied, climbing out of the passenger seat and went to straddle Jacob's lap, locking her thighs tenaciously around his hips. "And I'm not going anywhere."

"Sometimes I forget you're real," he smiled, thumbing away a loose strand of bronze hair, and tucked it behind her ear.

"Well, I am," Nessie retorted, the rich chocolate hue of her eyes adorning mischief and need. "So, why don't you enjoy me for a spell?"

"Nessie. . ." Jacob whispered.

Renesmee gently rocked the center of her body against the crotch of Jacob's denim jeans, his limp member stiffening at the intense friction. He grunted at the frustration plumped in his pants, automatically bucking his hips forward. Squirming, Nessie whimpered and further ground her hips against him, causing his wood to suffocate terribly in his too-tight jeans. His hands dug into Nessie's slender hips, forcing her to gyrate faster against his pulsating bulge. The scent of the half-breed's arousal pervaded the thin space of the car, drowning his senses in the sweet aroma of her excitement. Jacob's mouth watered, hungry to be buried in Renesmee's tight sheath.

"Will you let me distract you, Jacob?" Renesmee queried seductively, running her nimble digits through his raven locks. Her bottom lip jutted out.

"Mmhmm." Jacob chuckled huskily, a bead of sweat formulating at the center of his forehead. "Are you seriously pouting for sex, Nessie. . . in a truck?"

"Maybe," Nessie shrugged nonchalantly, knowing that if she feigned being disinterested, that would arouse Jacob all the more.

She lifted herself off his lap, bringing their dry movements to a screeching halt, and Jacob's sex all but screamed in annoyance. Her hands gripped the shoulders of both seats, trying to adjust her stance, and felt a streak of wonder wander through the veins of her body. Jacob grasped her knee with one hand while the other one slid up the back of her shirt, and bent her over the seats—her ass right in his face.

"Where do you think you're going?" Jacob asked, tenderly massaging the flawlessly rounded cheeks of Renesmee's rear, and she elicited an indulgent mewl from her roused voice.

"Mmm, Jacob," Nessie groaned, her onyx pupils dilating as she glanced over her shoulder at him. Her knees trembled with anticipation as she gazed at the wolfish grin plastered on his face.

Curling his finger around the band of his imprint's beige panties, Jacob salivated profusely as he slowly peeled the cotton fabric from her body. When she lifted up her right leg so that he could slip the panties off, Jacob placed a quick peck on her heel, then did the same with her left foot. She giggled each time, apparently a little ticklish there. He grinned sheepishly, shoving the hybrid's underwear inside of his pocket for later, and attached his tongue to Nessie's drooling, pink slit and savagely lapped at her silky sex. Jacob nearly broke down, the taste of her honey-like juices so heavenly sweet; he wanted to push her into the backseat of his truck and claim her without a second thought.

"Please, Jacob," Nessie whimpered, swirling her hips in time with Jacob's expert licks. "Jacob," she repeated in a desperate whine.

Music to his ears.

"Mine," he growled possessively, the wolf riddled in delight, and pinned Renesmee's thighs down to the heads of the front seat, her back stapled to the roof of the truck. With the pads of his wide thumbs, he spread her tight entrance and traced his thirsty tongue right around her delectable rim. She squealed in felicity, almost falling forward into the backseat. Her opening seized the pink flesh of his tongue, stroking it through her damp core. "You like that?" Jacob inquired, gently massaging the tip of Nessie's clit with his middle finger—the tiny button of fire twitching sporadically. "C'mon. Let me hear you, beautiful."

"Oh, yes!" Nessie groaned, a droplet of thrill dripping onto the vehicle's carpet. "Jacob, baby, please, I need you so much!"

Grinning to himself, and equally mesmerized by the sight of her creamy ass in his face, the shape-shifter nudged her forward. Jacob made haste in shoving off his jeans, and joined his Nessie in the backseat. But he wanted to slow down the process a smidgen. He took Nessie's shell-pink mouth captive, their hungry lips brush against each other—tender and loving; but in the midst of being enraptured in her sweet kiss, Jacob's desire to be within her body all but erupted out of him.

Nessie lied beneath Jacob, her flushed palms burning against the heated skin of his copper cheeks. His fingers coiled against the white-lily texture of her cheeks, brushing the rim of her lower eyelashes. The two smiled warmly at one another as Nessie's legs encircled around Jacob's waist, guiding their nether regions together. He plunged his member into her moist cave, drowning greedily inside her wetness, and slowly stroked himself in and out of her.

Her body contracted tenaciously around his meaty wood, Nessie shivering each time. She whimpered desperately as Jacob's long manhood repeatedly stabbed into her sweet spot, every last gland receiving much needed attention. Digging the curved whites of her nails, the partial vampire-human scratched into Jacob's defined forearms—tracing his flexed muscles. He drove into her faster, harder, emitting a grunt with each thrust—gritting his teeth. Jacob gyrated his thumb against the tip of Nessie's clit, making her all the more sensitive to his merciless thrusts.

Moments later, the young woman's tight walls quivered, milking Jacob for every last drop of his warm essence—her juices crowding the swell of his shaft. In that same second, white ropes of her cum squirted out of Jacob's plump and straight into Nessie's womb. And then, with his heart beating a mile a minute, nuzzled his face between Nessie's pillowy, alabaster breasts as the couple caught their breaths.

"Wow," they sighed in unison, then both laughed.

"I love you," Nessie murmured, combing her tired digits through Jacob's hair.

"I love you, Nessie," Jacob yawned.

_I should be over all the butterflies_

_But I'm into you _

_I'm into you_

_And baby, even on our worst nights_

_I'm into you_

_I'm into you_

_Let 'em wonder how we got this far_

_'Cause I don't need to wonder at all_

_Yeah, after all this time_

_I'm still into you_


	56. Out of the Woods

**Author's Note: Yes, yes, yes, I'm alive! I know I've been gone for a long time. A lot has been going on, both good and bad. I've started writing my own story, with my own plot and characters, but I truly, truly missed this story. I missed Jacob and Nessie! I'm still obsessed with Jacob and Renesmee. I don't know when this story will be finished, but I vow that someday you will read its conclusion. Please forgive me for the long absence. **

**Disclaimer: As always, nothing belongs to me. Title song by Tswizzle.**

_Looking at it now_

_It all seems so simple_

_We were lying on the couch_

_I remember you took a Polaroid of us_

_Then discovered _

_The rest of the world was black and white_

_But we were in screaming color_

_Edward Cullen was by himself for a moment, shut behind the door to his deceased daughter's former bedroom. He sat at Renesmee's mirror bench, his sunlight-hued irises examining the dusty contours of every last corner. The periwinkle walls were painted with pink and yellow flowers, a Monet portrait hung high above the bed. Stuffed animals—teddy bears, giraffes, wolves, even a Loch Ness Monster—rested near Renesmee's closet, all in a row from smallest to largest. A wallet-sized photograph of Jacob, Bella, and himself was pasted on the top right corner of the rectangular mirror, while several other pictures of the wolf pack and Cullens were glued on the bottom left._

_The bedroom smelt like Renesmee did—used to. . .like sugary-sweet fruits—strawberries, pomegranates, and raspberries; although, Edward couldn't easily ignore the putrid scent of wet dog laced within the fruity fragrance. _

_Almost a year had passed since Renesmee transferred most of her belongings to La Push and changed her name from Cullen to Black, but Bella and Edward never cleared or cleaned the remaining items in her room just in case she and Jacob ever quarreled—she might have needed a place to escape temporarily. Edward was satisfied how Renesmee's sanctuary remained intact, still relatively neat and illuminated with her vivacious spirits—colors clashed and miss-matched; nothing Alice would approve of._

_But now, it lacked his daughter, more than it already had before._

_Sharply exhaling, the vampire rubbed his marble digits against his eyelids. If he had been human, he would burst out crying like a big baby, then he would have lacked the strength to comfort Bella. That is how Edward found himself in Renesmee's bedroom. He wanted to escape the sickening aroma of all types of perfumes and colognes that pervaded the fresh air; he wanted to flee from the melancholy mood that set upon the Cullen household permanently. It was too much to be around everybody. Edward couldn't cope._

_Everyone had discovered their own way of handling the grief of Nessie's lost life. Carlisle remained locked up in his office, rereading old medical journals and jotting down notes on the psychology of homicidal minds, wanting to make sense out of the golden hind's hostility. Esme drowned her garden, absentmindedly killing precious plants as she hummed a heartbroken melody, trapped in a spell of sadness. Jasper could usually be found outside, training training for an epic battle that would never come, while he took his anger out on the boulders and the trees. Alice took on a drab, unkempt style, wearing faded-out bluejeans and gray sweatshirts; bright colors reminded her too much of Renesmee and those memories were too unbearable. Emmett hadn't cracked any jokes lately, still locked in a state of shock and denial, while Rosalie cleaned and re-cleaned every inch of the house. For the most part, Bella seemed fine, but that's because she must have believed Nessie wouldn't stay gone._

_As for Jacob, who the hell knew?_

_There was a dark voice within Edward's mind, a voice that had lain silent for more than eight years—the voice of a monster. Dripping with a sinister tone, the monster reminded him of a time where everyone would have been so thrilled to the abomination child gone from this world; after all, it had been Edward's most desperate wish not too long ago and it was belatedly granted. Maybe it was that black desire for his own daughter's death that quieted Edward. The thought churned in his stomach, ringing with untruth. Although the monster's intentions were for pure evil, Edward knew it was his grief speaking. _

He could have been there; he could have done something.

_It was more bearable to blame himself for this tragedy rather than the person who was actually responsible—Renesmee._

_Edward's legs became all too frustrated with sitting down and stood up from the bench. He walked over to the window, where a mother sparrow was perched and chirping cheerfully. He recalled how Nessie used to adore awaking to the soft song of the birds on Saturday mornings. It filled her with such a purifying joy, giving her a strong faith in life—that she was always safe. Expelling a long sigh, Edward unlatched the metal mechanisms, and lifted the window open. The sunlight streamed in, the world was at peace as if Nessie's personality fluttered in the wind._

_Edward sunk his hands into his pockets of his gray suit pants, his gaze following the sparrow as she flew away, the flap of her grayish-brow wings graceful like the breeze._

"_It's another beautiful day," he said to no one in particular. His pale skin shimmered in the yellow rays of the sun, gleaming like broken diamonds. It disgusted him. The strigoi sat down on the edge of Renesmee's bed, and buried his head in the palms of his hands, choking on a broken, dry sob._

_He was sick to death of being unable to cry—ashamed that his immortal body would not permit him. Grief came packaged with all the sensations of wanting to cry—that tight, aching feeling that ping-ponged rapidly betwixt the center of his chest and the pit of his stomach, that strong desire to crumble into a helpless ball on the floor somewhere, and the sharp constriction inside his mouth as he constantly attempted to keep himself from screaming aloud—yet his face remained desolate._

_He was sick to death of being unable to die, forced to live with this harsh reality—with no end in sight._

_Thick heels clicked against the steps, making their way to Renesmee's room—in reluctance, however. The sound paused briefly before reaching the door, and there was a little knock._

"_Edward. . . ?" Bella called out, as the door slowly creaked open. Edward exhaled inaudibly, listening to the awful strain in his wife's voice._

_Bella repeated herself, entering through the doorway, her hand was framed around the bras knob, as she leaned against the door. "Edward?"_

"_I'm in here," Edward answered—the first words he had managed to speak to anyone in forty-eight hours. He was caught off-guard with how harsh he sounded. "I'm in here, love."_

"_What are you doing in Renesmee's room?" Bella questioned, her golden-brown eyes glancing nervously around the wide room._

_Looking over his shoulder, the male vampire examined his wife studiously. Bella had been shoved into a thick dress, black and short, and matching stocks that sensually embraced her vanilla calves. Her hair was done up in a bun, making her appear very conservative. Edward took notice of the tightness adorned on her scarlet-painted lips, trying to keep a frown off her face. He could tell that she was much in the same state he found himself in—they were both trying desperately to cling to sanity, not wanting to fall to pieces. All body parts stitched together as if Bella was a raggedy, old doll. She was still the most beautiful woman in the world, but Edward couldn't couldn't ignore the heavy sorrow that passed back and forth between their quick glances._

"_Just looking around," Edward answered, sucking in a pained breath. A hand slid underneath Nessie's pillow, and grabbed a photo album._

_There were all of Renesmee's memories._

"_We're going to be late to the funeral," Bella said flatly, swallowing a nervous knot in her throat._

"_I decided not to go," Edward admitted hoarsely, tapping his left foot against the mint-green carpet._

"_You and I have to go. She was our daughter," Bella reasoned, joining Edward on the bed. She folded her hands in her lap, remaining utterly statuesque and calm, though she probably should have blown up at him._

"_I don't think I can handle it, Bella," Edward voiced, a slow and steady sigh escaping through his system. It was already difficult to stay intact living in a house full of rueful vampires, let alone a whole funeral home filled with wolves and humans._

_Flipping to the first page of the photograph book, the first picture was one he took himself long ago. Nessie was two years-old, though physically about seven. It was a rare sunny day in Forks and Jacob was having a day out with the male members of his pack, and Nessie was trying to fill up her time by taking a plethora of pictures. Edward spent the entire day with his tiny daughter, recounting his experiences in the 1980's—the clothes, the hair, the music—and he taught her how to climb trees. When sunset fell upon them, Renesmee's porcelain skin was caked in dirt and her bronze locks were decorated with leaves. She looked too adorable and he had to get a photo, so he did._

_Thinking back on that day, Edward realized it was one of the few occasions where Nessie ever needed him as a companion. He was glad that she valued that day as well. The rest of the album was full of pictures—memories—that he had little to do with._

"_We'll be strong together, like we always have been," Bella promised, resting her soft hand around his strained wrist, as he turned the page._

"_It just feels wrong to still be alive," Edward shrugged, wondering how fate could be so miserable and cruel—how fate could so easily permit two parents to bury their daughter six feet underground. "To have outlived Renesmee. . ."_

"_I know," Bella agreed, pursing her lips._

"_It's not fair," Edward added, gazing down at another old photograph._

_This one was of a much young Renesmee—a large, blue towel wrapped around her four year-old body after a naked dash through the rain. It had been pouring like cats and dogs when she came home from a shopping spree with Rosalie and Alice. As soon as she stepped foot into the main house, Nessie was peeling away every item of clothing, save her undergarments. Although everyone was suspended in state of dismay, they all burst out laughing. Once Nessie had finished with her frolic in the weighty downpour, Bella dried her off and snapped a shot._

_What a weird day, but still another wonderful one._

"_Hey, I miss her, too," Bella nodded, managing to smile in remembrance of that moment as well._

"_I can't even cry over it," Edward stated, shaking his head stiffly._

"_Yeah, I get that. We've just had our hearts ripped open, but we can't bleed. We can't cry. We can't even open a bottle of vodka and numb the pain for a little while," Bella replied, tugging at the edges of her brunette locks._

"_We just have to live with ourselves." Edward raked his long fingers through his messy, bronze hair. He would have given anything to have an outlet for this madness. "Forever."_

"_Who knows? Maybe we'll get the closure we need from the funeral," Bella said, thumbing tenderly at Edward's wrist. Wishful thinking._

_But he didn't want closure. _

_What he wanted to do was ground Renesmee, and bar her from the rest of the outside world—to punish and protect her. What he wanted was a second chance at looking after her. What he wanted was to shake her for being so reckless and stupid. So what if she managed to save everyone's lives in exchange for her own? It still meant that everyone who had ever loved Renesmee had to go on with only half of themselves. What Edward wanted to do was scream at her, then pull her into his arms and refuse to ever let her go._

_He didn't want to accept her death as fact. _

"_How can I face that, Bella?" he inquired incredulously, furrowing an eyebrow at her. He didn't want to be angry, but. . . "Maybe I don't want to let her go."_

"_Neither do I."_

_He flipped the page again, spotting a picture of great importance._

"_Do you remember her first birthday?"_

_A smile crossed Bella's lovely face, though microscopic in its hesitant existence. "How could I forget?" She laughed, drawing the picture album into her lap. "Alice wanted to throw an extravagant party to celebrate Nessie's birthday and the anniversary of my becoming a vampire," Bella recalled aloud._

"_But you insisted that Renesmee's birthday be all about her," Edward added, recalling all the fuss between his wife and his favorite vampire sister. It was one issue Bella was assertive about._

_Thankfully, Alice finally gave in when Bella argued that Renesmee was her daughter, so she had no right to dictate Renesmee sharing her special day with her mother—that wouldn't have been fair. Every young child deserved one day to themselves. Effectively thwarted, Alice relented begrudgingly._

_The day had gone according to plan. Renesmee received dozens of gifts from vampires, wolves, and humans, the birthday cake had disappeared in fifteen minutes, and everyone had a blast._

"_But Renesmee made me a present anyway," Bella continued._

_Nessie had braided strings of all shades blue with the utmost precision to construct a bracelet, and stuck beats of hearts and stars, then carefully tied each end. Though it was her birthday and though Bella had stressed how that day should have been completely dedicated to her, Nessie still worked hard on creating the perfect present for her mother. For Edward, it was a beautiful sight—to see his two favorite people exchange affections. Nessie was the only Bella ever readily accepted presents from, because she couldn't deny her. _

_There was a power to Renesmee, a spell that everyone was under. Nobody could reject or want to hurt her feelings, especially Bella; but maybe that's because she was always the one that knew what and who Nessie really was. Their bond had been formed the very second Bella discovered her pregnancy._

"_She was always so sweet." Was. . . "Pure and giving."_

_Bella nodded in agreement. "She always wore her heart on her sleeve, and she was never embarrassed about it." She tilted her head, tracing the simper of Nessie's mouth in the picture. "That's not a trait she got from either of us."_

_His hands gripped the edge of the bed as he laid back. He stared up at the ceiling, counting the glow-in-the-dark stars tacked on. "She was so young," he mused aloud, shifting his head to the side to look at Bella. "Not even a decade has gone by since her birth."_

"_And yet she lived so fast," Bella said, shutting the book, and then shoved it aside. "Nessie went through so much in a short time and she loved every second of it." She rested her elbows on the top of her knees, burying her face in her hands._

"_My biggest regret is that her and I weren't very close."_

"_Don't do that to yourself, Edward," Bella cautioned solemnly, mumbling through her cold hands. "Renesmee loved you so much."_

"_Not as much as she loved Jacob."_

_And that was the hard, brutal truth. Most fathers had at least sixteen years with their daughters before their first love swoops in unannounced and uninvited, casting said fathers off to the sidelines. But Edward only had sixteen minutes before that mongrel became his daughter's entire world. Edward was never Nessie's number one man. It was always Jacob._

"_How has he been throughout all of this?"_

"_As cold as stone."_

"_I kind of wish he were here," Edward thought, resting his hands over his stomach. "We all lost her. It wasn't just him."_

_Bella patted her husband on the hand, then relaxed on her stomach and laid down on her stomach. "I just think that Jacob needs this time to himself."_

"_You're probably right," Edward nodded, sitting up. He was terrified of looking into Bella's face for too long—recounting the human features he used to adore about her so much, all the same features Renesmee had inherited. It was too painful. _

"_Edward. . ."_

"_I haven't had a dream in over a century. Now, I'm trapped in a nightmare," he said, a tight grimace adorned upon his expression._

"_I . . . Yeah." Bella sighed, turning over on her back. Her legs dangled off the bed, swinging them back and forth. "I was under the impression that it would all end with Faethera's death, but the train wreck keeps going."_

"_It's a fight," Edward started, gritting his teeth and clenching his teeth, "to keep holding on to any sanity. It makes contemplate that, in spite of every obstacle we've overcome, if we've been destined to lose this whole time."_

"_I've wondered that, too."_

"_I wish I could have held her at least one more time, or listen to the sound of her laughter," Edward whispered, haunted by the ghosts of dreams that could never be. _

"_Don't we all?" Forcing a contemptuous laugh, Bella questioned rhetorically. _

"_I should have grounded her," he quipped halfheartedly. It was a tragedy on its own how, though his heart was eternally dead, he could feel it drop heavily into his stomach and churn._

"_I recall that we did," Bella retorted, getting up from Nessie's bed. She knelt down in front of Edward, resting her hands in his lap._

"_You know," Edward began, fishing his cellular phone out his breast pocket and dialed a familiar phone number. "I keep calling her cell phone number, praying that she'll pick up. Then, I hear Renesmee's voice and I remember. . . She is never coming back, is she?"_

_On the opposite end of the phone came five unanswered rings, as Bella and Edward leaned in to listen closely. Then, there was a happy go-lucky giggle, followed by incoherent mumbles from Jacob. "Hello!" she exclaimed, ever-chipper with her beautiful voice. "This is the new Missus Renesmee Black. I'm sorry I couldn't answer your call, but leave me a message and I vow to get back to you as soon as possible. Bye!" _

_There was a long beep, then Edward pressed 'End' on his phone. _

_The brunette exhaled, burying her face in Edward's lap to conceal a spurt of sad laughter before she let out a broken whine. Edward combed his long fingers through her dark locks in attempt to console her. "God, Edward. . . Can I tell you a secret?"_

"_Of course, love."_

"_I am so mad at Renesmee. . . I hate her. . ." Bella confessed, her voice muffled by the barrier of Edward's knees. She trembled as if she were stuck outside in the rain, ready to catch her death. "I feel so pissed off at her for dying."_

"_Bella. . ." he murmured gently._

"_And I hate myself for being angry when all she did was protect everyone," Bella said, shamed by the hurricane of confused emotions. She gazed up at him, her eyebrows knitted together in a pained expression. "I want to be able to forgive her, Edward, but I'm unsure if I can."_

_Edward leaned in, pressing his forehead to hers. "How long have you been holding that in?"_

"_Awhile now," she answered with a shrug. "I feel terrible for feeling that way toward my own daughter, but I can't help it. If Renesmee had been more patient with the situation, maybe she would still be alive. Edward, I don't want to love a dead daughter."_

"_It's okay, Bella."_

"_It's not okay!" Bella bellowed, her tone caught between a whimper and a complaint. "How could she have been so reckless?"_

"_It's nothing we could have so easily stopped," Edward replied. "Renesmee wouldn't want you to beat yourself up."_

_Bella closed her eyes, exhausted from all of this suffering. What did it matter what Renesmee wanted or would want? She failed to consider what everyone else wanted. "I wish I could fall asleep."_

"_Yeah," Edward concurred, also desperate to dream of a happier reality. "Jacob is lucky to at least have that much. It would be nice to have a few hours to forget."_

"_Even if it's a lie?" Bella queried, arching an eyebrow. She could sense Edward's bitter tone, and came to Jacob's defense. "Because he eventually has to wake up and remember all over again. We. . . We can go numb to it, but he. . . He has to live with himself every day."_

"_So what," Edward grumbled under his breath, rolling his eyes. "As I said before, I want to see Renesmee's face again, and I don't mean when she's laying down in a coffin. I would give anything, even if it's not real."_

"_Me, too. In a heartbeat—so to speak," Bella replied, frowning._

_Their vampire sister, Rosalie, softly knocked on the door and called out to the pair. "Edward. . . Bella?"_

"_Come in, Rosalie," Edward beckoned gently as he tucked a loose strand of Bella mahogany hair behind the shell of her ear._

"_It's almost time for the funeral," the blonde announced nervously._

"_Okay."_

_Rosalie nodded, managing to form an expression that was half a wince and half a smile, then flitted away._

_Bella stood up. "Are you okay to go?" she queried, framing her face with her hands. "I'm not going to force you."_

_Edward nodded once, the fractional movement emotionless and blank, hesitant and slow. "Yes, love. I just need one more minute."_

"_I love you, Edward."_

"_I love you, Bella."_

_She slowly walked toward the door. With her right foot over the threshold of the doorway, she spared an empathetic glance over her shoulder, but Edward had not been paying attention. Sighing softly, Bella exited the room._

_Edward gazed out the window once more, glaring at the perfect sunlight. "It's not going to be easy to say goodbye, kiddo."_

. . .

"Renesmee. . ." Edward murmured into his daughter's fruit-scented copper locks, holding the petite-framed half-breed to his chest a smidgen too tightly.

For fifteen minutes now, Bella and Edward had been alternating their little miracle back and forth, between their arms—revealed and overjoyed to see Renesmee safe and sound at home, back from her reckless adventure to Seattle. If either vampire parent were able to cry tears of overwhelming comfort, two sets of cheeks would have been soaked.

"Mom, Dad. . . It's all right. I'm fine. You can let go now," Renesmee assured them lightheartedly, finally being released.

"Where the hell have you been?!" Edward demanded angrily, drawing his young daughter back into his arms—not quite done holding her. He was relieved to see her—alive—but damn it.

She shouldn't be a runaway case when there was a golden hind on the loose.

"I missed you, too, Daddy," Nessie giggled, her tone breathless as she struggled to break free from his hug.

"We were worried sick about you, Renesmee," Bella yelled, both of her hands balled into fists. "How could you do something so reckless?"

"I had to. . . I had to leave," Nessie shrugged sheepishly, grasping her soul mate's hand for moral support and squeezed her tiny finger around his knuckles until they were chalk-white.

"For what purpose?" Edward inquired, lowering his eyebrows into a dark glower at the young couple.

"For Jacob," she retorted.

The two exchanged loving glances and smile.

"I'll kill that mongrel," the male vampire threatened, taking a daring, dangerous step forward in Jacob's direction.

"Hey, you don't have to talk about me like I'm not standing right in front you, bloodsucker," Jacob said, unmoving and unafraid.

"Stay out of this, dog."

"Why did you even come back?" Renesmee's mother questioned, her eyes turned to coal-black in madness.

"To set things right," the shape-shifter replied, his arms draping over Nessie's petite shoulders.

"Things were just fine without you," Bella growled, her features fierce like a protective momma bear.

"Then, why did Nessie come and find me, huh?" the Quileute challenged mockingly, his lips tilted upward in a partial grin.

"Because she doesn't know-"

"Mom. . . I do know," the half-breed woman cut off her mid-sentence, careful. "And I don't care. Jacob is my soul mate. We're meant to be together."

"Honey," Edward gently sighed, slumping his shoulders tiredly, "one day Jacob might imprint on someone else. How do you expect to handle something so cosmic?"

"I won't imprint, Edward," Jacob stated matter-of-factually, shaking his head to and fro. "I will not imprint on anybody else."

"How could you possibly know that?" Edward asked, concentrating on the thousands of thoughts running through the wolf's mind. "It's still a possibility."

"I already imprinted on Nessie," Jacob answered honestly. There was no hesitance or uncertainty in his voice. He was absolutely serious, positive that destiny had willed Jacob's fate to join with Nessie's.

"What?" Edward queried incredulously, glancing between his daughter and former competition. "How? Leah-"

"Leah is Nessie's best friend," Jacob nodded.

"But Jacob is the love of my life," Nessie finished.

The shape-shifter's copper-toned expression glowed—the chocolate shade of his irises sparkling affectionately as his gaze fell completely on Renesmee; a wide grin was placed on Jacob's face, two dimples deep on either cheek while Nessie declared her love for him. Edward didn't need to be able to read minds to know that Jacob was telling the truth. His mind was in a state of utter bliss, just like the rest of the wolves that had imprinted.

"When did you imprint?" Edward asked, trying to wrap his head around an impossible truth.

"The night of Seth and Marguerite's wedding reception," Jacob retorted and shifted to the side, embracing his imprint from behind.

"Really? You did?" Nessie giggled, surprised by Jacob's admission.

"I did." Jacob smiled, dipping his noise into the back of her neck and gently soaked in her sweet aroma.

"That's impossible," Bella muttered. "There's no way you could have."

Renesmee scoffed exaggeratedly, folding her arms over her chest. "Is it really such a problem that Jacob is devoted to me?"

"Nobody is saying that," Edward replied, still reeling from the news.

"The hell I'm not," Bella disagreed sternly, shooting daggers at Edward. "Jacob, you need to stay away from my daughter. Otherwise, I promise that I will personally rearranged your face. You'll look like an ugly, smelly wolf all the time."

"Over my dead body," Nessie said, squinting the slits of her eyes in a dark glare.

Jacob and Bella grimaced in unison.

"Don't you care about your life?" Bella inquired, perplexed—yet not as perplexed as Edward was right then.

"Jacob is my life," Nessie countered aggressively. Her sweet expression was reddened, infuriated to the shade of hellfire. Jacob brushed his soft lips against her earlobe, effortlessly setting her at ease and effectively bringing her temperature down. "You risked your life time and time again to be with Daddy."

"I don't want to lose you again," Bella reasoned, her words seemingly slow-paced.

"Then, let's get something straight here. . . Mother, if I should die tomorrow or the day after, I will be with Jacob at any cost," Renesmee stated, taking on a tall, protective stance in front of the proud Native American man. She refused to back down under her mother's rage.

With each minute that passed, Edward felt all the more puzzled by the words exchanged between mother and daughter—the only one left of the loop. He couldn't rely on Renesmee's thoughts to explain the situation—they were much to jumbled and he couldn't decipher the many images running through her head—but Jacob was different. As usual, the words and images swirling endlessly in his mind were loud and clear. The pictures were dark, even brutal—Nessie lying dead in his arms. _This is my fault. All of this is my fault. Nessie, maybe you should have listened to Bella. She knows best. Nessie_. . .

"You'll die anyway if you stay with Jacob!" Bella yelled, stepping forward as Nessie and Jacob stook back.

"Hey, hey, hey! Time out!" Edward exclaimed, flailing his arms wildly to get everyone's attention. He needed to make sense of what was happening; he needed this nonsense sorted out. "Everyone, let's take a breather. He then turned to the shape-shifter, furrowing an eyebrow in demand. "Jacob, join me outside. I need to speak with you."

Jacob hesitated, squeezing his arms around Nessie's waist tighter. "I'm okay in here."

"Now," Edward growled, much like a lion to his prey.

The half-human half-vampire girl disengaged her body from Jacob's warmer embrace, then shifted around to face him. "Go, Jacob," she murmured into his ear. "My mother and I have a lifetime to discuss."

Giving into his imprint's whim, Jacob sunk his fixation to his feet and followed his would-be father in-law outside. Edward continued to read the Quileute's mind—how it spun a web of disarray and confusion—the color of Renesmee's skin flushed, pale, almost ghostly; all the while, Jacob cradled her immobile, broken body close. He could feel the strange turmoil swirling like a disastrous tornado in Jacob's thoughts—and Edward could only feel frustration from lacking the information behind the causation of those repulsive visions.

Why was Renesmee lifeless in Jacob's mind?

"So, would you like to tell me what on God's green earth is going on or shall I pry it out of you?" Edward queried, digging his fists into his pockets, and gritted his teeth in annoyance.

The sheepish wolf-man tapped a foot against the wooden floor, uncomfortable with the vampire's black-eyed scrutiny. "Edward, believe me. . . You don't want to know. Just leave it alone."

"Listen to me, you uncouth pup, your imprint happens to be my daughter. I need to every facet of the situation in order to protect her," Edward replied, rolling his eyes. It wasn't that he didn't like Jacob, but after he simply up and left Renesmee, he didn't trust him any longer.

"Trust me, Edward."

"Tell me, Jacob," the strigoi hissed impatiently, tempted to grab the dumb dog by the collar and throw him into a tree. "Why do you keep picturing her dead?"

"I'm not picturing anything," Jacob answered, swallowing nervously and tried to think of something else.

"I can read your mind, Jacob, so run that by me one time," Edward snarled.

Thankfully for Jacob, Bella and Renesmee came to his rescue finally.

"They're memories," Bella spoke up, her voice squeaking in eerie places.

Edward slightly tilted his head to the side, furrowing an eyebrow. "Memories?"

"Maybe you should sit down for this."

"I'm fine standing up, thank you."

"A lot of this has happened before."

"Faethra has happened before," Jacob clarified, clearing his throat uncomfortably.

"I. . ." Renesmee paused, standing by the door frame, and bounced one knee up and down, "died. The only difference between then and now is that Jacob imprinted on me when I was a few minutes old, not Leah."

"What. . . ?"

"I've known for years, Edward," Bella confessed, apprehensively scratching the side of her face.

"I helped Jacob find a way to restore Renesmee's life."

"By use of time travel?" Edward chuckled in disbelief, shaking his head. There was no way any of this were possible. "Seriously?"

"It's the truth!" Jacob exclaimed, clenching his fists. "We signed a contract that gave away our memories in exchange for a second change."

"Do you realize how crazy this all sounds?" Edward asked, keeping his tone even.

"Daddy. . . Let me show you?"

Although Bella and Jacob, actually agreeing on something, shook their heads in protest, Nessie as always did what she thought was the right thing. She placed her left hand to her father's cheek and inwardly elaborated on her own memories. The first one was of Jacob, the hard and infuriated features focused on her while the shadows of the walls danced in the ebony color of his eyes; then, suddenly, an expression of immense serenity and bewilderment washed over him.

Nessie showed everything of her life with Jacob—the way he gave her the warmest hugs, when they faced the threat of the Volturi, the way he held her hand through many growing pains, and the way he kissed her. . . But their happily ever was not to last when the golden hind, indeed, invaded their lives; and Edward had the chance to witness it all. Again.

He nearly jerked back when the secret of her death was exposed to him, but he remained still. Edward felt Nessie's death—her aches, her sadness, her last breath, her last thoughts. Not a single detail was vague or forgotten.

"Stop it!" Edward rasped, gently pushing her hand away from his cheek. "That's enough. I can't take anymore."

"You were the last person that needed to know," Nessie said.

"What about Leah?"

"No," the hybrid retorted, shaking her head calmly. "Leah will have to accept the information she already knows."

And then—finally—the reality sunk in, the realization of what happened to her. He put his hand to Nessie's cheek, glad she was alive now. "You died, baby girl?"

Renesmee nodded numbly. "It was a very long time ago." She sighed in exasperation, her thoughts growing hazy as Bella began to activate her shield.

"I'm so sorry," Edward apologized, bringing his little girl close and kissed her on the forehead. "I should have done more to-"

"It's okay, Daddy. I'm okay," Renesmee replied, a gentle smile adorned upon his sweet face.

"I'm so sorry I couldn't protect you," Edward again apologized as his gaze slowly traveled toward Bella, who stood off to the side with a guilty look dressed on her slouched posture.

"Dad-" Renesmee started, but was immediately silenced when Edward raised a hand.

"And you!" he roared at Bella, overcome by grief, betrayal, and rage. How dare she keep this from him for so long? Didn't he deserve to know? Rensmee was his daughter, too. "You knew this entire time and you never going to bother to tell me a single thing!"

"I'm sorry, Edward," Bella apologized, shrinking under his stiff glare, and raised her eyebrows in an almost triangular pattern to convey her regret. "I wanted to tell you. Every day, I wanted to tell you the truth, but I . . ."

"Then why didn't you ever say something?" Edward demanded incredulously.

"I just couldn't!"

"What the hell stopped you?"

"Maybe I can help iron out some of the details, Edward," a woman spoke, stepping out from the shadows of the many trees.

"M-Mom. . . !"

_Looking at it now_

_Last December_

_We were built to fall apart_

_Then fall back together_

_Your necklace hanging from my neck_

_The night we couldn't quite forget_

_When we decided to move the furniture_

_So we could dance_

_Baby, like we stood a chance_


End file.
